366. The REAL Reason You Keep Self-Sabotaging (It Started in Childhood) w/ Jason VanRuler
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
Release Date: 12/11/2025
371. Meals By Cug: Why Caring Less Might Make You More Successful
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
Get Guided Support on Building Your Brand If you’re looking for clarity, strategy, and guidance on building a personal brand that actually feels like you, book a free brand call here: 👉 In this episode of Decoding Success, Matt LeBris sits down with Danny Mondello—better known as Meals By Cug—for a raw, funny, and unexpectedly deep conversation about success, pressure, and why caring less might actually be the key to winning. Danny never chased fame or money. He was simply cooking, filming what he was already doing, and staying consistent. Over time, that approach turned into...
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370. Robbie Bent (Co-Founder, Othership): I Built the Dream… But I Was Wearing Armor
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
YOUR PERSONAL BRAND CAN LEVEL UP... START HERE: Robbie Bent reveals why entrepreneurial success, high performance, and constant pressure can disconnect you from the very self you’re working so hard to elevate. After years of scaling a fast-growing company, Robbie found himself battling anxiety, founder stress, and emotional burnout — even while living the dream on paper. He shares how operating in “armor” — overwork, intensity, and survival mode — helped him achieve success, but left him feeling tense, overwhelmed, and internally disconnected. But here’s the breakthrough:...
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369. Why Betting on Yourself Feels Lonely (But Pays Off) w/ Lil Mo Mozzarella
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
YOUR PERSONAL BRAND LEVELED UP STARTS HERE: What does it really take to bet on yourself — especially when the path feels isolating and uncertain? In this episode, I sit down with Lil Mo Mozzarella to talk about leaving a stable career, stepping into comedy later in life, and why real confidence is built through action, not approval. We unpack the loneliness that comes with growth, the importance of protecting your value, and how turning pain into purpose is often the key to long-term success. This conversation is about earned self-belief — the kind that comes from showing up, taking...
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368. Why Shame Is Blocking the Life, Love, and Intimacy You Want w/ Stefanos Sifandos
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
LEVELING UP YOUR PERSONAL BRAND STARTS HERE: Most people think they’re stuck because they lack discipline, confidence, or clarity. But what if the real reason you’re not experiencing deeper intimacy, freedom, and fulfillment… is shame you don’t even realize you’re carrying? In this episode, I sit down in person with Stefanos Sifandos for a raw, honest conversation about the invisible force shaping our relationships, our self-expression, and the parts of our lives where we keep holding back. We explore why shame doesn’t usually announce itself loudly— it hides in avoidance,...
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367. Why You Keep Self-Abandoning (and How to Finally Come Home to Yourself) | Kate Eckman
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
Kate Eckman breaks down why so many high-achieving people feel disconnected despite doing everything “right.” She explains how self-abandonment begins early in life as a way to earn love, safety, and approval—and how people-pleasing, perfectionism, and overachievement are survival responses, not strengths. Drawing from her own healing journey, Kate reveals why emotional invalidation teaches us to doubt our instincts, silence our truth, and perform instead of feel. She shares why choosing yourself often feels lonely, how solitude exposes what distraction hides, and why telling the...
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366. The REAL Reason You Keep Self-Sabotaging (It Started in Childhood) w/ Jason VanRuler
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
👉 Want clarity on your own brand? Book a free 1:1 call with the Brand Builders team: Most people think they’ve healed their past. But the truth is far heavier: your childhood blueprint is still running your life — your relationships, your success, your self-worth — and you don’t even realize it. In this raw and revealing conversation, therapist and author Jason VanRuler returns to Decoding Success to break open the invisible patterns that shape us: earning love, chasing highs, self-sabotaging the moment life gets quiet, and mistaking achievement for fulfillment. This episode...
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365. Rory Vaden: Differentiation Is Dead. Be Unique Instead.
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
BUILD YOUR BRAND w/ Rory Vaden joins the show to break down why differentiation is dead — and why your real advantage is your uniqueness. If you’ve ever struggled to build an authentic personal brand because you’ve spent years people-pleasing, fitting in, or carrying an identity that wasn’t truly yours, this episode is a reset. Rory shares how he reinvented himself overnight, why nobody is thinking about your brand as much as you think they are, and the simple shift that helps you build a brand rooted in service, not ego. We also dive into his Trajectory Test, becoming...
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364. Why You Resist Change (And How to Finally Surrender) with Jessica Zweig
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
💰 Book your F R E E Brand Strategy Call here: freebrandcall.com/mattlebris In this powerful and deeply honest conversation, Matt sits down with bestselling author, entrepreneur, and spiritual teacher Jessica Zweig for a raw exploration of what it really means to surrender, evolve, and take radical responsibility for your life. Jessica opens up about her recent season of expansion — navigating anxiety, overwhelm, business transitions, spiritual initiation, and the deeper truth behind why so many of us resist change even when we’re praying for a breakthrough. Together, they unpack...
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363. Dr. Mariel Buqué on Breaking Generational Trauma & Healing in Micro Victories
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
BOOK YOUR FREE BRAND STRATEGY CALL 👉 In this powerful episode of Decoding Success, we are joined by Dr. Mariel Buqué — psychologist, intergenerational trauma expert, and author of Break The Cycle. This conversation goes deep into what healing actually looks like, why the in-between seasons of life feel so uncomfortable, how to train your nervous system to tolerate triggers, and why breaking cycles can feel lonely — especially for the black sheep, cycle-breakers, and self-healers. If you’ve ever felt like you’re evolving faster than the environment around you… If you’ve ever...
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362. How to STOP Chasing Validation & Become Your Own Best Friend w/ Valerie Greenberg
Decoding Success with Matt LeBris
👉 Start here (free strategy call): Today’s conversation with TV personality and author Valerie Greenberg is a masterclass in shifting from external approval to inner authority. We dig into befriending the inner critic, choosing presence over the next “big high,” and how to build your Confidence Community... those truth-tellers who both cheer you on and call you up. If you’ve ever felt like a black sheep trying to “catch up,” this one brings you back to center. In this episode, you’ll learn Best-friend energy: Practical ways to befriend (not silence) your inner critic so you...
info_outline👉 Want clarity on your own brand? Book a free 1:1 call with the Brand Builders team:
https://freebrandcall.com/mattlebris/
Most people think they’ve healed their past.
But the truth is far heavier: your childhood blueprint is still running your life — your relationships, your success, your self-worth — and you don’t even realize it.
In this raw and revealing conversation, therapist and author Jason VanRuler returns to Decoding Success to break open the invisible patterns that shape us: earning love, chasing highs, self-sabotaging the moment life gets quiet, and mistaking achievement for fulfillment. This episode isn’t about blame — it’s about finally understanding why you are the way you are… and how to rewrite the script.
If you’ve ever wondered why you push so hard, why you crash so hard, or why the middle feels unbearable — this one will hit you right in the truth.
WATCH ON YOUTUBE: https://www.youtube.com/@MattLeBris
In this episode, we uncover:
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The childhood wound most people think they healed… but is still driving everything.
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Why high achievers feel empty even when they’re “winning.”
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The difference between using pain and being controlled by it.
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How to stop earning love and start feeling “I’m okay either way.
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How to change your relationship with your past without reliving every wound.
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What self-sabotage actually is — and the surprising first step to stop it.
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The role expectations play in suffering (especially with parents).
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Why being your authentic self feels so dangerous — and why it’s the only path to real connection.
This conversation is simple, confronting, and clarifying — the kind that doesn’t just give answers, but gives you yourself back.
Connect with Jason
Website: https://www.jasonvr.com/
Pre-Order the NEW Book
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/jason.vanruler/
Chapters
00:00 The Drive for Success and Parental Influence
02:28 Understanding Past Pain and Its Impact
05:27 The Role of Pain in Motivation
08:16 Embracing the Middle of Transformation
10:59 Finding Fulfillment Beyond Achievement
14:00 Shifting Intentions and Self-Acceptance
17:01 Whose Voice Are You Listening To?
17:53 Understanding High-Pressure Moments
19:06 The Nature of Resilience
20:03 Beyond Talking: Processing Pain
20:53 Identifying Patterns in Pain
22:14 The Role of Expectations in Relationships
23:37 Making Peace with Family Dynamics
25:51 Accepting People for Who They Are
27:39 The Question of Self-Acceptance
29:30 Grieving Unmet Expectations
31:31 Finding Acceptance in What We Need
33:37 Cultural Influences on Our Needs
34:23 The Complexity of Modern Life
36:30 Authenticity in Relationships
38:59 The Challenge of Being Authentic
41:50 Navigating Modern Dating
44:51 The Importance of Relationships
45:49 Healing Through Storytelling
50:20 Understanding the 'Why' Behind Our Actions
53:08 Embracing Failure as a Path to Growth
55:59 The Myths of Trauma and Healing
57:48 The Importance of Communication in Relationships
01:00:31 Simplifying Life: The Hard Mode Dilemma