Deliver The Profile Episode 297: Dried Up, Tied and Dead to the World
Release Date: 07/02/2024
Deliver The Profile Episode 307: The Nerding Hour (with Daniel Daughhetee)
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Guest shots guest shots guest shots. This time Ronnie is joined by Daniel Daughhetee (Thrawnderdome) to talk about "Empty Planet", an episode about a serial bomber whose bombings are based on obscure sci-fi literature. Who better to decode this nonsense than sci-fi nerd Daniel Daughhetee? Along the way we recommend some actual good stuff and explain why Daniel prefers Joe Mantegna to Mandy Patinkin.
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Deliver The Profile Episode 306: Girlfriend 2000
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JJ takes a stalking case personally--is it because she's a girl or is there some other culprit? We learn in this episode that the bicep is the penis equivalent for network television and Ronnie recounts his disastrous viewing of My Date With Drew, a real horror show. Also, Rossi and Hotch are letting the kids handle stalking as they interview a battered woman. It's real Grade A stuff.
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Menom on Venom Episode 3: Venom: The Last Dance
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The boys discuss the final ever until the next one Venom movie, The Last Dance. Yes, Venom dances, so really the title lives up to its promise. What else does Venom 3 have? More symbiotes, more MCU actors in non-MCU roles, a Maroon 5 song, a road trip that doesn't really go anywhere and, of course, SILLY VOICES. Listen as Ronnie and Jazz talk for more than the length of the actual movie about how you're a loser and a sucker if you like these things about Tom Hardy having a "bromance" with Spider-Man's laundry. Oops, sorry, can't mention Spider-Man. Venom is somebody's old laundry, okay?
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Deliver The Profile Episode 305: Manimal vs. Jack the Ripper (Seriously)
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Not a dream! Not a hallucination! Not an imaginary story! Deliver The Profile's victory lap culminates in revisiting two series from the show's past: Manimal and Night Man. They're back, and they're together, in the Night Man episode "Manimal". No description of the insanity that unfolds will do it justice so why don't you click the play button and hear it for yourself?
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Deliver The Profile: Kino Korner: Road House
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Ronnie and Jazz spend nearly two hours dissecting the one, the only Road House. The ONLY Road House. When fat and tough were indistinguishable, a bouncer's natural enemy was a John Cassavetes staple, and Sam Elliott was a hard trodden 45 year old. Play us out, Jeff Healey Band!
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Deliver The Profile Episode 303: Bailey Beer
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Here it is, it's finally here: the season finale of Criminal Minds: Evolution Part Deux. Who will live? Who will die? Whose fate will be called into question despite the fact that we know no principal cast member is going to die at this juncture? In "Save The Children", the Gold Stars kidnap Prentiss and it's up to Voit the serial killer to help the team find her. Ronnie and Jazz are just glad it's over. For now. Tune in next week for Deliver The Profile Guest Shots.
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Deliver The Profile Episode 302: Bingo Royale
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Ronnie and Jazz discuss the penultimate episode of Season 17, "Stars and Stripes", the new Crow movie (which bombed so badly it's already out of theatres by the time this description is being written), Glover and more. "Stars and Stripes" introduces new villains such as "pedophile mercenary" and "black girl who's shot in the head almost immediately". It's almost over.
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Deliver The Profile Episode 301: Jillian and Rossi Sitting In A Tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G
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Scandalous! In one of the shortest podcasts in years, Ronnie and Jazz dissect "North Star", episode 8 of this bullshit season 17. Rossi and Gideon's ex-wife kiss! Something happens to Damien! We meet Voit's lawyer, and he's played by a Shield alum! You'll find out why this podcast is under an hour because that's about all there is to this episode.
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Deliver The Profile Episode 300: Piran-haha
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It's episode 300, something neither of the hosts recognized while recording, so prepare to be disappointed if you're expecting fanfare. What do we have? Well, there's a guy melting dudes in his basement. You know shit is real when the episode begins with a "Viewer discretion is advised" screen. What else happens? Oh yeah, convicted felon Felicity Huffman joins the show as Mandy Patinkin's ex-wife! We're 17 years in and introducing long dead characters' exes, we've hit rock fucking bottom.
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Deliver The Profile Episode 299: Episode 420
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JJ and Prentiss get high in "Message in a Bottle", one of the dumbest hours this show has ever delivered us. Not since "Eyes Wide Shut" has marijuana been portrayed so poorly. But at least there's other plot, such as Tyler running afoul of an ex-girlfriend and David Rossi cleaning a gun.
info_outlineEyes are still being taken out in "Kingdom of the Blind", episode 4 of the interminable slog that is Criminal Minds: Evolution: Season 2. This time the enucleator draws little tattoos on herself after committing the act, like Mr. Zsasz. Unlike Mr. Zsasz, nobody even approaching Alan Grant or Norm Breyfogle's talent level is working on this shit. Also, Sicarius meets with his family and Prentiss is bailed out of jail by a Rossi who's still talking to Head Sicarius. Christ almighty.