329: Stop Taking Communication Advice from Men

In this fiery and insightful episode, Heather Hansen takes a bold stand against one-size-fits-all communication advice — especially the kind coming from male experts that simply doesn't work for women. With decades of experience in advocacy, law, and coaching, Heather breaks down why advice from well-meaning male voices like Jefferson Fisher and Vin Gang may actually backfire for women in real-life situations, especially when it comes to being interrupted, advocating for yourself, or commanding authority.

She offers a powerful alternative: learn how to advocate the way that actually works for you. With stories from her courtroom days, coaching practice, and research-backed insight, Heather shows women how to stop trying to “man up” their voice and instead lean into proven techniques designed for how women are actually perceived — and how we naturally communicate.

If you’ve ever followed advice that left you feeling ignored, labeled as “too much,” or just plain ineffective, this episode is your permission slip to do things differently.

In this episode, you’ll learn:

• Why “great advice” often fails women — and how to know if it’s not for you

• The difference between communication and advocacy (and why you must master both)

• What research says about women being interrupted — and why standard advice can make it worse

• How women are judged differently for the same behaviors as men — and what to do about it

• Why avoiding conflict OR mimicking male assertiveness both backfire

• The proven tools that help women advocate effectively, without being labeled abrasive or bossy

• Why Heather’s courtroom experience taught her to prepare men and women differently — and how you can apply that in everyday life
  
  

Resources Mentioned:

📚 The Elegant Warrior by Heather Hansen
📖 The Next Conversation by Jefferson Fisher
🎧 Jay Shetty’s podcast interview with Vin Gang
📊 The recent study on how women CEOs are labeled

Bonus Announcement:

🎓 FREE Masterclass: How to Handle Interruptions (and Be Heard) Without Being Dismissed
🗓️ August 13 at 3 PM ET
➡️ Can’t join live? Sign up to get the replay.
🎁 But if you can make it live, there’s a special surprise just for you!
🔗 [Register here]

In this episode:

[00:00] Heather sets the tone: Why she’s tired of advice that doesn’t work for women
[01:45] Communication vs. advocacy — how they’re different and why it matters
[03:10] Why following male experts left Heather confused and frustrated
[05:00] The two critical questions to ask before following anyone’s advice
[05:30] The case of Jefferson Fisher: great communicator, but his advice may not fit
[07:50] Why women’s voices and presence are systemically dismissed
[10:00] Research reveals the biases women face when speaking up
[12:30] Why “too much” isn’t always powerful — and what actually gets results
[14:00] How to know your audience (or “jury”) before you speak
[15:00] The feminine communication edge — and how to use it strategically
[16:30] Heather’s courtroom wisdom: train men and women differently for better results
[17:15] A call to action: Get the tools to speak effectively and get what you want

“You have to speak for your ideas, your potential, and your worth — because they can’t speak for themselves.” – Heather Hansen

Connect with Heather:

• Schedule a call with Heather

• Follow Heather on Instagram

• Website

• Watch Episodes on Youtube

• Heather’s TikTok ‍

• [email protected]

 

The Elegant Warrior Podcast and content posted by Heather Hansen is presented solely for general informational, educational, and entertainment purposes. The use of information on this podcast or materials linked from this podcast or website is at the user’s own risk. It is not intended as a substitute for the advice of a physician, professional coach, psychotherapist, or other qualified professional, diagnosis, or treatment. Users should not disregard or delay in obtaining medical advice for any medical or mental health condition they may have and should seek the assistance of their healthcare professionals for any such conditions.