8. Inside the Mind of a 12-Year-Old with ADHD: Wisdom, Humor, and Hoverboarding
Release Date: 11/12/2024
19. ADHD and Identifying Emotions with Tera Wages
ADHD in the Real World
In this episode, Martha sits down with Tera Wages to explore the Core Emotion Wheel — a powerful tool created by marriage and family therapist Dr. Glenn that helps people identify, name, and communicate their core emotions. Originally designed for couples, this tool has proven to be transformative for people of all ages, including children and adults with ADHD. What We Cover: How emotional dysregulation is central to the ADHD experience, from big reactions and masking, to the intense somatic experience of emotions felt in the body. Tera walks us through what the Core Emotion Wheel...
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18. How Fair Play Changed Our Marriage (and Our Lives) with Julie Shain
ADHD in the Real World
What happens when Julie overhears Martha in a DC coffee shop?? They discover they're both passionate about the same marriage-saving system and more. In this conversation, Martha sits down with Julie Shain to discuss how Fair Play transformed their marriages, reduced conflict by up to 70%, and created space for the lives they actually wanted to live. Julie opens up about navigating marriage with three kids under five, the passive-aggressive WhatsApp chains that nearly broke her relationship, and how a simple card game became the foundation for sustainable change. Plus, she shares her...
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17. When to Tweak Your System… and When to Burn It Down
ADHD in the Real World
This episode is for you if • You keep trying to “fix yourself” with new routines and it never sticks • You are exhausted from forcing systems that fight your brain • You want to know when to tweak, and when to change the circumstance entirely What we’re talking about today • Accommodations: changing how you access the thing, not the thing itself • Modifications: changing the expectation, the workload, or the whole situation • Why both are valid, and why one is not “better” than the other • Real life examples: sleep, mornings, work schedules, and laundry The big takeaway...
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16. Recovery Time Matters More Than Your Streak
ADHD in the Real World
In this episode, I connect running advice to life with ADHD and all the pressure we feel to build perfect habits. We are told to add more and more habits, keep the streak going, never miss a day, and then we beat ourselves up the second we fall off. I am here to tell you that the real magic is in how quickly you restart, not how perfectly you never miss. I will walk you through how to: • Shift your focus from perfection to recovery • Treat a missed day or a missed month as a normal part of being human • Celebrate the 60 days you did the thing instead of obsessing over the 3 you did not...
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15. From Chores to Care: A Conversation with Lori Sugarman Li
ADHD in the Real World
In this powerful episode, Martha sits down with Lori Sugarman Li; Fair Play Facilitator, family coach, and author of Our Home: The Love, Work, and Heart of Family. They talk about the often invisible and undervalued labor that keeps households running. Lori shares the story behind her children’s book, a beautiful tool designed to spark conversations about equity, contribution, and care within families. The conversation dives deep into Lori’s journey from a career in marketing to full-time caregiving, the culture shock of moving from Canada’s year-long parental leave to the U.S., and a...
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14. Before, During & Aftercare for Work Travel with ADHD
ADHD in the Real World
In this episode, I break down how I support myself before, during, and after traveling for work—especially when attending conferences. Fresh off a recent trip, I’m sharing what helps me not just survive professional development experiences, but actually enjoy them, get what I need from them, and avoid total burnout. As someone with ADHD who used to lead professional development for others, I’ve picked up a lot of tools along the way. Whether it’s how I prep for travel, navigate sensory overload, or build in recovery time, this episode is full of real-life strategies for taking care of...
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13. Rethinking Money: ADHD, Shame, and Financial Freedom with Keina Newell
ADHD in the Real World
Money can feel overwhelming, especially when you have ADHD. In this episode, I sit down with my longtime friend and money coach, Keina Newell of Wealth Over Now, to talk about how we can break free from shame, make peace with our spending, and build a future that supports our needs—without giving up the things that bring us joy. We explore: Why thinking about "future you" is so hard with ADHD The role of shame in financial decision-making Practical steps to start managing money without overwhelm How small, messy progress is better than waiting for the "perfect" time Keina shares how she...
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12. Navigating Domestic Inequity, ADHD, and Mental Load with Paige Connell
ADHD in the Real World
In this episode, Martha Hoffman speaks with Paige Connell, a working mom of four and a content creator who explores critical topics like the mental load in parenthood, domestic inequities, and systemic challenges such as affordable childcare and paid parental leave. They dive into the unique challenges faced by neurodivergent individuals and families, including how ADHD impacts domestic dynamics and parenting. Martha and Paige share personal stories, thoughtful strategies, and valuable insights on navigating household responsibilities with equity—not equality. They discuss how to support...
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11. Mental Load and ADHD with Zach Watson
ADHD in the Real World
In this episode, we explore the intersection of ADHD and the mental load in relationships, uncovering the hidden costs of imbalance and how societal norms often add to the strain. Drawing on years of teaching experience, we discuss strategies to engage interest-based brains and tackle resistant behaviors—whether with middle schoolers or partners. We dive into how gamifying emotional labor can help ADHD brains build lasting habits, why unlearning outdated gender roles is crucial, and the difference between skill and will when addressing mental load challenges. This conversation is packed with...
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10. Fair Play and ADHD – A Game Changer for Home and Family
ADHD in the Real World
I can’t believe it took me 10 episodes to talk about Fair Play! This system, based on Eve Rodsky’s book, has been a game changer for my family and my work. In this episode, I break down how the Fair Play Method helps partners create more equitable systems for managing home and family life—especially when ADHD is part of the equation. Here’s what you’ll learn: Why equity (not equality) is the key to sharing responsibilities in a way that works for both partners. How Fair Play’s design naturally supports ADHDers with structure, ownership, and clear communication. The importance...
info_outlineIn this special episode, I sit down with an extraordinary 12-year-old with ADHD who shares his unique perspective on navigating school, friendships, and life. From hoverboarding during Zoom calls to rocking in class to focus, he sheds light on what helps him thrive and what he wishes teachers and classmates understood about ADHD. Join us as we explore everything from managing boredom to finding dopamine boosts in daily life. His insights will make you laugh, reflect, and maybe even rethink ADHD. This episode is perfect for anyone wanting an honest look at ADHD through the eyes of a child!