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Childless After Infertility: You’re Not Meant to Just Survive This

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

Release Date: 06/18/2025

The Story a Childless, Infertile Woman Tells show art The Story a Childless, Infertile Woman Tells

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

How to tell your story with pride when IVF failed and you are living childless after infertility.  When IVF fails and motherhood did not happen, it is so easy to feel like your only option is to hide. You spent years doing everything you possibly could—fertility treatments, doctors’ appointments, lifestyle changes, endless waiting. You gave your body, your money, your heart, and your time to the dream of becoming a mom. And despite all of it, you find yourself living childless after infertility. In those moments, it can feel impossible to talk about what really happened. Maybe you...

info_outline Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable show art Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

When IVF fails and you’re childless after infertility, people often try to cheer you up with “at least you can…” comments. But what these comments really reveal is how uncomfortable our society is with sadness. In this episode, I share how a recent injury reminded me of that cultural reflex, why sadness is not a flaw, and how you can create room for both grief and growth as a childless woman. Plus: details on my free class September 17 and my World Childless Week panel on September 20, Rediscovering Your Identity as a Childless Woman. Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels...

info_outline IVF Failed: Calm Your Brain and Find Peace when Childless show art IVF Failed: Calm Your Brain and Find Peace when Childless

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

When IVF fails, your brain can feel like the enemy, spiraling with infertility triggers, constant comparison, and the grief of being childless after infertility. In this episode, you will discover why your brain reacts this way when fertility treatments do not work, and three simple practices to begin calming your mind and finding peace. Have you ever felt fine one moment, and then a single pregnancy announcement, bump photo, or piece of unsolicited advice left you spiraling? If IVF failed you and you are now childless, your brain may feel like the enemy. But the truth is, your brain is just...

info_outline Childless Legacy – How to Create One show art Childless Legacy – How to Create One

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

Episode 181: Childless Legacy – How to Create One If you are childless after infertility, what kind of legacy are you leaving? When IVF, IUI, or years of trying to conceive did not lead to the family you dreamed of, it can feel like your story has nowhere to go. Like your legacy disappeared along with the possibility of motherhood. But what if you could create a legacy that does not depend on having a child? In this episode of The “So Now What?” Podcast, Lana shares a deeply personal reflection on what legacy really means when you are childless not by choice. Inspired by her...

info_outline Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong show art Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong Have you ever walked into a room and instantly thought, “I’m the only one here without kids”? That sinking feeling in your body is what is known as othering. Othering happens when you are seen, or you see yourself, as separate because you do not fit a societal mold. If you are childless after infertility or your IVF journey ended without the child you dreamed of, you know how often othering can happen. You get left out of conversations, your life experiences are dismissed, or someone makes a comment that forces you to explain why you do...

info_outline Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It show art Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It If you are childless after infertility, you have probably been on both sides of the spectrum: staying silent because you do not have the words or emotional energy to talk about your journey, and then overexplaining to justify that you “did enough” to try to become a mom. In this episode of The So Now What? Podcast, we talk about the exhausting pressure to explain why you did not keep going with fertility treatments, adoption, or donor eggs, and how to protect your peace when people ask intrusive questions. I share a personal passage from...

info_outline IVF Without a Pregnancy — No One Saw You Trying show art IVF Without a Pregnancy — No One Saw You Trying

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

What if the hardest part of infertility wasn’t just the treatments… but the fact that no one even knew how hard you tried? In this episode of The "So Now What?" Podcast, we’re talking about an overlooked reality: what it feels like to go through years of IVF and fertility treatments and never even get a positive pregnancy test. No bump. No loss others can see. Just you, quietly rearranging your life around the hope of motherhood… with nothing to show for it when it didn’t work. This is for you if you’re childless after infertility and have felt the sting of being dismissed,...

info_outline Friendships When You're the Only Childless One show art Friendships When You're the Only Childless One

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

You love your friends. You’ve grown up together, lived through milestones, and shared so many memories. But now they’re raising kids, and you’re navigating life after infertility. You’re the only one in the group chat without a child, and suddenly, the conversations feel distant. Do you go and feel left out? Or do you stay home and feel even more alone? In this episode of The "So Now What?" Podcast, Lana shares the story of reuniting with three of her closest college friends (all moms) and what it now feels like to show up to these friendships as a proud, childless woman. Years ago,...

info_outline Infertility and the Shame, Secrecy, and Guilt That Haunts You show art Infertility and the Shame, Secrecy, and Guilt That Haunts You

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

If you are a woman who is childless not by choice, you know the heartbreak of infertility does not end when treatments stop. You might still feel like shame and guilt are following you around every day. In this episode, you will hear why infertility shame and secrecy can stay with you for years after IVF or other fertility treatments. Lana shares insights from a 1998 doctoral thesis that described shame as the central emotion of infertility and explains why so little has changed in how women feel about themselves today. You will discover how guilt convinces you that infertility was your fault,...

info_outline Childless After IVF: When the Path to Your Dreams Feels Impossible show art Childless After IVF: When the Path to Your Dreams Feels Impossible

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

If you have spent years going through fertility treatments like IVF, pouring everything into your dream of motherhood, and still found yourself without a child, you know how heavy it feels to imagine a future that could ever feel as meaningful. In this week’s episode, Lana shares a deeply personal story about standing on a piece of vacant land in Michigan, a place she and her husband dreamed of building their future home, and realizing that the path to something beautiful isn't coming without obstacles. If you’re childless after infertility, it’s so easy to believe your life will always...

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If you’ve ever wondered if this is just how life feels when you don’t become a mom, this episode is for you.

  • Maybe your fertility journey ended with heartbreak instead of a baby.
  • Maybe you’ve been told (by the world, by your inner voice) that life will always feel incomplete, lonely, or second-best now.
  • Maybe you scroll past pregnancy announcements and family vacation photos, not because you’re bitter, but because they hurt.
  • And maybe you’ve started to believe the quiet story that society tells women like us: That life without children will always feel like you’re just holding on.

But what if that story isn’t true?

In episode 172 of The “So Now What?” Podcast, Lana shares:

  • The truth about the emotional aftermath of IVF and infertility that no one talks about.

  • Her own story of navigating the grief of a chromosomally abnormal embryo (Trisomy 16) and what came after fertility treatments ended.

  • Why the world’s attempts to “fix” you with adoption, donor eggs, or surrogacy often leave you feeling more invisible.

  • How guilt, shame, and comparison can keep you frozen in time, and what it takes to finally move forward.

You'll hear how women inside her 12-week coaching program, go from surviving each day to actually loving their lives again. One client shares how she stopped obsessing over what people with kids were doing and started finding confidence, peace, and simple joys in her everyday life.

This episode invites you to imagine a summer, and a life, where:

  • You wake up excited for your day, not dreading another reminder of what’s missing

  • You reconnect with your body and stop treating it like it failed you

  • You feel connected to your partner again, building a future that feels like yours

  • You finally stop pretending to be okay, and actually are

If you’re ready to stop surviving and start living a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling—even without the children you always dreamed of—this episode will show you what’s possible.

💬 Ready to Take the Next Step?

Don’t let another summer pass you by in a fog of comparison and sadness.

✨ Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call with Lana to create a plan for what comes next:
👉 Click here to schedule your call

This is your first step toward creating a life that fits again...one that you love, even though it turned out differently than you expected.

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