IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

I am an infertility survivor—the kind you never hope to become: childless. After enduring multiple rounds of IUI and IVF at some of the leading fertility centers, I was advised to discontinue treatment. When my fertility journey ended, I was offered no resources to help me navigate the reality of an unexpected childless life. I was left asking: So now what? In the years that followed, I tried to convince myself I’d be OK, but I wasn’t. I felt shattered, alone, and failed—not just by the process but by my own body. I longed for someone who truly understood the pain I felt, a guide to help me navigate a life without children. But I couldn’t find it. So, I decided to create it. Today, I am still childless, but I’ve redefined what that means. I’ve learned that a meaningful and purposeful life is possible, even without motherhood. I’ve learned to love myself and embrace the body I once felt had let me down. Through my certification in life coaching and my own transformation, I’ve discovered tools and insights that helped me thrive—and I’m here to share them with you on The "So Now What?" Podcast. If you’ve been on this journey, join me as we build what we were never offered: a sisterhood for the bravest women I know. Together, we’ll rewrite the narrative, shedding labels like failed, unexplained, miscarriage, pregnancy loss, not-viable, or advanced maternal age. Follow me on Instagram: @lana.manikowski for resources, inspiration, and opportunities to live a fulfilling life without the children you dreamed of.

The Story a Childless, Infertile Woman Tells 09/16/2025

The Story a Childless, Infertile Woman Tells How to tell your story with pride when IVF failed and you are living childless after infertility. When IVF fails and motherhood did not happen, it is so easy to feel like your only option is to hide. You spent years doing everything you possibly could—fertility treatments, doctors’ appointments, lifestyle changes, endless waiting. You gave your body, your money, your heart, and your time to the dream of becoming a mom. And despite all of it, you find yourself living childless after infertility. In those moments, it can feel impossible to talk about what really happened. Maybe you have learned to keep quiet because the pain feels too heavy. Maybe you are tired of comments like “You could always adopt” or “At least you can sleep in.” Maybe you worry about making others uncomfortable. But here is the truth: hiding from your infertility story will never create the life you crave. In this episode, I share why there is nothing more beautiful than telling your story, even when IVF failed and motherhood didn’t happen. I will show you how owning your infertility story changes the way you see yourself and how others see you, and how telling your story can open the door to a future that feels powerful, grounded, and deeply meaningful. In this episode you will learn: Why you can feel proud of your infertility story even if IVF failed How hiding keeps you small and why telling your truth sets you free What life can feel like when the question “Do you have kids” no longer holds power over you How sharing your story helps you reconnect with your body, your friendships, and your future You may not have the children you dreamed of, but you can still live a life that feels rich, purposeful, and joyful. Your story is not one of failure. Your story is one of strength. And there is nothing more beautiful than learning how to tell it. 🌟 Links Mentioned in This Episode Register for my free masterclass (Wednesday 9/17): Join my World Childless Week webinar (Saturday, Sept 20): Download my free guide: /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/38246050

Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable 09/09/2025

Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable When IVF fails and you’re childless after infertility, people often try to cheer you up with “at least you can…” comments. But what these comments really reveal is how uncomfortable our society is with sadness. In this episode, I share how a recent injury reminded me of that cultural reflex, why sadness is not a flaw, and how you can create room for both grief and growth as a childless woman. Plus: details on my free class September 17 and my World Childless Week panel on September 20, Rediscovering Your Identity as a Childless Woman. Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable Have you ever been told “At least you can travel” or “At least you don’t have to pay for college” after your IVF failed? If you’re childless after infertility, you know how painful and dismissive these “at least you can” comments feel. People think they’re comforting, but they rarely land that way. In this week’s episode of The So Now What? Podcast, I explore what these comments really mean, why they don’t help, and how to stop internalizing the silent message they send — that sadness, disappointment, and grief are emotions you shouldn’t feel. You’ll hear: Why people reach for “at least” comments and what it reveals about society’s discomfort with sadness How my nephew’s recent soccer injury reminded me of our instinct to erase someone else’s sadness The connection between these comments and what we hear when IVF fails Why sadness is not a flaw but proof that something mattered to you How to hold both infertility grief and the good that still exists in your life Why rediscovering your identity as a childless woman can shift your story from loss to strength This episode also celebrates the 4-year anniversary of The So Now What? Podcast. Four years of creating a community for women who were left without resources after fertility treatments ended without a baby. Free Resources & Upcoming Events Free Class: Wednesday, Sept 17: Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond Without Spiraling or Shutting Down). Morning/afternoon in the US, evening in Europe. Register ! World Childless Week: Saturday, Sept 20: I’m leading a panel called Rediscovering Your Identity as a Childless Woman at 8 AM CT / 2 PM BST. Join us live or catch the replay. Register ! Free Guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond) Download it for free. ☕ Help me celebrate 4 years of The “So Now What?” Podcast! If this podcast has supported you, would you leave a rating or review? Reviews help more women who are grieving infertility discover this resource. As a thank-you, I’ll send you a $5 Starbucks gift card. 👉 Here’s how to claim it: Follow the to leave your rating or review. Take a screenshot once your review is posted. Email it to me here: [email protected] When I receive your screenshot, I’ll send you a Starbucks gift card as my thank-you for celebrating this milestone with me. Sadness doesn’t mean you’re broken. Grief after infertility is real, but it doesn’t define your whole story. Listen to Episode 183: Sadness and Infertility: When It Feels Uncomfortable to learn how to stop internalizing “at least you can” comments and start creating space for both your grief and your growth. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/38148580

IVF Failed: Calm Your Brain and Find Peace when Childless 09/02/2025

IVF Failed: Calm Your Brain and Find Peace when Childless When IVF fails, your brain can feel like the enemy, spiraling with infertility triggers, constant comparison, and the grief of being childless after infertility. In this episode, you will discover why your brain reacts this way when fertility treatments do not work, and three simple practices to begin calming your mind and finding peace. Have you ever felt fine one moment, and then a single pregnancy announcement, bump photo, or piece of unsolicited advice left you spiraling? If IVF failed you and you are now childless, your brain may feel like the enemy. But the truth is, your brain is just trying to protect you. In Episode 182 of The “So Now What?” Podcast, you will discover why your brain works the way it does after infertility and how to start rewiring it so you can feel calmer, steadier, and more in control of your story. You will learn: Why your “smoke alarm brain” gets so sensitive after IVF fails and infertility treatments end What it means to “name it” when you feel yourself reacting (fight, flight, freeze, or fawn) How to look for glimmers of safety that calm your nervous system faster than pep talks Why bridge thoughts are more believable and more healing than toxic positivity How shifting the way you respond to infertility triggers helps you reclaim peace and confidence in your childless life Once you stop seeing your body and brain as the enemy, everything changes: your friendships, your marriage, your time, and your ability to create a meaningful future without children. Announcements 🌍 World Childless Week On Saturday, September 20th at 2pm BST (8am CT / 9am ET) I am honored to be leading a panel: Rediscovering Your Identity as a Childless Woman. Each panelist has walked a unique path through autoimmune conditions, male factor infertility, singlehood, and female factor infertility. Together, we will share reflections on moving from “hopeful mother” to confident women living life on our own terms. This is not a conversation about what was lost. It is about what is possible. If you are ready to feel proud of the woman you are, with no disclaimers and no shame, this is for you. 🎓 Free Live Masterclass I am hosting another session of Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond), this time scheduled to fit international listeners. It is happening on September 18th at 11:30am CT / 5:30pm BST. This is a brand new class, not a replay. If you have ever frozen, shut down, or replayed conversations after someone made a comment about your childlessness, this live call will give you practical language and mindset tools to respond with confidence. Free Resource Get my free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond) You do not have to stay stuck in autopilot reactions. Your brain is not broken, it just needs a new way forward. Tune in now to learn how to begin calming your brain after IVF fails so you can feel safe, steady, and proud of the life you are creating without children. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/38064845

Childless Legacy – How to Create One 08/21/2025

Childless Legacy – How to Create One Episode 181: Childless Legacy – How to Create One If you are childless after infertility, what kind of legacy are you leaving? When IVF, IUI, or years of trying to conceive did not lead to the family you dreamed of, it can feel like your story has nowhere to go. Like your legacy disappeared along with the possibility of motherhood. But what if you could create a legacy that does not depend on having a child? In this episode of The “So Now What?” Podcast, Lana shares a deeply personal reflection on what legacy really means when you are childless not by choice. Inspired by her grandfather’s 118th birthday and the stories passed down about the life he lived, she challenges the belief that legacy begins when you are gone or only matters if you are remembered by children. Your legacy is how you show up in your life today. It is how you treat yourself, how you treat others, and how you decide to keep living even when life turned out differently than you hoped. In this episode, you will learn: What a childless legacy really is, and why it matters now more than ever Why waiting to be remembered is keeping you from feeling fulfilled How to reflect your values in your day-to-day life A new way to define meaning and purpose after infertility Why you do not have to wait for someone else to tell your story A challenge to start building your legacy now, not later If you have ever wondered how to create a life that feels meaningful without the children you dreamed of, this episode will speak directly to you. 📅 Free Masterclass on August 26 “Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond)” Learn how to respond with calm, confidence, and clarity to the unsolicited comments and advice that often come your way after infertility. ! 🌟 Resources and Mentions Free Guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You're Childless and How to Respond Download it here: Join the Back-to-School Photo Challenge Tired of feeling invisible while everyone posts pictures of their kids? Post a photo of you and celebrate who you are in this season. Tag @lana.manikowski on Instagram to join the challenge. Read the Book: by Lana Manikowski – A guide for women living childless after infertility Book a Thrive Call: If you are ready to stop wondering what is next and start shaping a life that feels good again, schedule your free You do not need a child to create a legacy. You just need to decide how you want to live yours. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37905255

Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong 08/12/2025

Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong Infertility and Othering: When You Don’t Belong Have you ever walked into a room and instantly thought, “I’m the only one here without kids”? That sinking feeling in your body is what is known as othering. Othering happens when you are seen, or you see yourself, as separate because you do not fit a societal mold. If you are childless after infertility or your IVF journey ended without the child you dreamed of, you know how often othering can happen. You get left out of conversations, your life experiences are dismissed, or someone makes a comment that forces you to explain why you do not have children. But here is something you might not have considered. You may be keeping yourself in that “other” role without even realizing it. In this episode, you will discover how you might be self-othering and how to shift the way you show up so you feel more connected and less defined by childlessness. I share why this topic is so personal to me after my own seven-year journey through IVF failed and ended without a child. You will learn the exact mindset shift that helped me stop letting “childless” be my headline and start introducing myself in ways that made me feel confident and part of the room. You will learn how to: Recognize when you are self-othering without realizing it Stop letting childlessness become your whole identity Walk into social settings feeling prepared to lead the conversation with who you are beyond motherhood Use simple questions to connect with friends, family, and colleagues without the focus being on parenting See yourself as more than the one without kids so others can too I also share a Thrive After Infertility client story that shows how one small change in how you show up can completely change how you are seen and how you feel in social situations. If you have been feeling disconnected, overlooked, or like you will never belong in rooms where most people are parents, this episode will help you step out of the “other” box, create your own sense of belonging, and feel empowered in any setting. Links from this episode Free Class: Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond) Learn practical ways to handle comments without shutting down or feeling small. ! Thrive After Infertility: 12 Week Coaching Program Work with me to create a life you love even without the children you dreamed of Book Your Free 45 Minute Thrive Call ! In this call, you and I will create a plan for how you can start thriving and loving your life after infertility. Book your call Follow me on Instagram If you are ready to stop letting childlessness define your story and start living in a way that reflects all of who you are, press play on this episode now. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37779460

Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It 08/08/2025

Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It Your Infertility Journey: How to Stop Explaining It If you are childless after infertility, you have probably been on both sides of the spectrum: staying silent because you do not have the words or emotional energy to talk about your journey, and then overexplaining to justify that you “did enough” to try to become a mom. In this episode of The So Now What? Podcast, we talk about the exhausting pressure to explain why you did not keep going with fertility treatments, adoption, or donor eggs, and how to protect your peace when people ask intrusive questions. I share a personal passage from Chapter 1 of my bestselling book So Now What? about the moment I learned my final embryo was not viable, and how that phone call ended my fertility journey but not my life. You will learn why the way you tell your story is one of the most powerful tools you have, and how you can start telling it in a way that feels true, peaceful, and rooted in who you are now as a woman without children. This is the exact work I do with my clients inside . I help you reclaim your story, stop overexplaining, and feel confident and proud in conversations about your life, even when it turned out differently than you dreamed. In this episode, you will learn: The two extremes: staying silent vs. overexplaining your childlessness Why overexplaining feels like putting your pain on trial How to stop offering your grief as “evidence” to be believed A real-life excerpt from my book So Now What? How to start telling your story on your terms without apology Why this shift changes how you feel about yourself in every room you walk into Links from this episode: Register for my free live class on Auguat 26, 2025 : Download your free guide: Download Chapter 1 of my book So Now What?: Book your free Thrive Call: If you are ready to create a life you love without the children you dreamed of and finally feel rooted, confident, and proud of who you are, I can help you get there. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37735115

IVF Without a Pregnancy — No One Saw You Trying 07/30/2025

IVF Without a Pregnancy — No One Saw You Trying What if the hardest part of infertility wasn’t just the treatments… but the fact that no one even knew how hard you tried? In this episode of The "So Now What?" Podcast, we’re talking about an overlooked reality: what it feels like to go through years of IVF and fertility treatments and never even get a positive pregnancy test. No bump. No loss others can see. Just you, quietly rearranging your life around the hope of motherhood… with nothing to show for it when it didn’t work. This is for you if you’re childless after infertility and have felt the sting of being dismissed, forgotten, or misunderstood because your story doesn’t come with "visible" grief. Here’s what we cover: Why IVF without pregnancy leaves a haunting silence around your story The reality of disenfranchised grief when you’re infertile and childless Why comparing your pain to others doesn’t bring healing, it brings shame The myth that you have to love your story in order to find peace How to stop minimizing your experience and start creating a future you feel proud of What it looks like to reclaim your voice and move forward without motherhood You don’t have to keep shrinking your grief or hiding your truth just to make others comfortable. This episode reminds you that you were in it. And that’s enough to matter. If you’ve ever wondered whether your story counts because you never got pregnant—this episode is your reminder: You don’t need proof to be seen. You don’t need a baby to validate your grief. You were there. You gave everything. And that matters. ✨ Mentioned in this episode: 📆 Free Masterclass: “Things People Say (and How to Respond)” Join me on Tuesday, August 26 at 6pm CT for a powerful free class where I’ll teach you how to navigate comments about your motherhood status—without spiraling, shutting down, or feeling like you need to justify anything. Register . 📘 Chapter 1 of my book “So Now What?” FREE The day I found out I’d never become a mom, and what happened next. 📝 - Free Guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You're Childless (and How to Respond) 📺 Watch this episode on YouTube 👉 Let’s connect: 🌐 Website: 📸 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@lana.manikowski 📕 Buy my book: https://www.lanamanikowski.com/book /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37604885

Friendships When You're the Only Childless One 07/22/2025

Friendships When You're the Only Childless One You love your friends. You’ve grown up together, lived through milestones, and shared so many memories. But now they’re raising kids, and you’re navigating life after infertility. You’re the only one in the group chat without a child, and suddenly, the conversations feel distant. Do you go and feel left out? Or do you stay home and feel even more alone? In this episode of The "So Now What?" Podcast, Lana shares the story of reuniting with three of her closest college friends (all moms) and what it now feels like to show up to these friendships as a proud, childless woman. Years ago, she would have dodged the invitation. But now? She’s looking forward to it—and she shares exactly how that shift became possible. If you’ve ever: Avoided girls’ weekends or coffee dates because you're childless after infertility Sat through motherhood conversations feeling invisible or irrelevant Wondered if your friendships could survive your childlessness ...this episode will help you imagine what’s possible when you no longer feel like the outsider. 💭 Imagine going to a girls’ weekend and not faking a single smile. 💭 Imagine feeling proud of your story and connected to your friends, even if their lives look different from yours. 💭 Imagine leaving your reunion feeling recharged and in love with the life you’re building. This is what thriving after infertility can look like. Lana also shares how this kind of transformation is possible through the work she does in the Thrive After Infertility Mastermind—and how you can begin by joining her free masterclass. 🎓 FREE CLASS: How to Respond to the Things People Say When You’re Childless On Tuesday, August 26th at 6pm CT, Lana is teaching a free class to help you respond to unsolicited comments about your motherhood status—without spiraling, shutting down, or plotting someone’s demise in the grocery store. 🔗 Register here: 🔗 Links Mentioned in This Episode: ✨ Register for the Free Masterclass (August 26) 📞 Book Your Free 45-Minute Thrive Call : 📘 Click to Buy My #1 Bestselling Book, So Now What?: 📱 Follow Me on : 📺 Watch on : 🎵 Follow Me on : /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37504255

Infertility and the Shame, Secrecy, and Guilt That Haunts You 07/16/2025

Infertility and the Shame, Secrecy, and Guilt That Haunts You If you are a woman who is childless not by choice, you know the heartbreak of infertility does not end when treatments stop. You might still feel like shame and guilt are following you around every day. In this episode, you will hear why infertility shame and secrecy can stay with you for years after IVF or other fertility treatments. Lana shares insights from a 1998 doctoral thesis that described shame as the central emotion of infertility and explains why so little has changed in how women feel about themselves today. You will discover how guilt convinces you that infertility was your fault, how secrecy keeps you isolated, and why infertility does not define your worth or your future. If you are tired of feeling like you failed or like you are living life on the sidelines, this conversation will help you imagine how thriving after infertility is possible for you. In This Episode, You Will Learn Why shame is often the hidden part of infertility no one talks about How guilt after IVF or failed fertility treatments can feel like punishment What happens when secrecy becomes your coping mechanism A client story showing how she went from feeling invisible to creating a life she is proud of How infertility coaching can help you rebuild your identity and confidence without children Ready to Thrive After Infertility? You do not have to keep guessing how to feel like yourself again after infertility. That is exactly what the Thrive Method is for. Inside Thrive After Infertility, you will learn how to: Rebuild confidence in who you are without motherhood as your identity Reconnect with your partner and friendships you have been avoiding Create milestones that bring purpose and joy to your next decades If you are ready to stop living in guilt and shame and start creating a life you love, . 💖 Links and Resources 📘 Download your free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (and How to Respond Authentically) 🌟 Explore Thrive After Infertility: Learn more about the 12-week coaching program for women who are ready to thrive without the children they dreamed of. 💬 Book Your Thrive Call: Create a plan to rebuild your identity and find clarity about what is next. ✨ Follow Lana for more inspiration: | | Share This Episode If you know a woman who is childless after infertility and still carrying shame or guilt, please share this episode. She deserves to know she is not alone and there is a way to create a life she is proud of. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37430720

Childless After IVF: When the Path to Your Dreams Feels Impossible 07/08/2025

Childless After IVF: When the Path to Your Dreams Feels Impossible If you have spent years going through fertility treatments like IVF, pouring everything into your dream of motherhood, and still found yourself without a child, you know how heavy it feels to imagine a future that could ever feel as meaningful. In this week’s episode, Lana shares a deeply personal story about standing on a piece of vacant land in Michigan, a place she and her husband dreamed of building their future home, and realizing that the path to something beautiful isn't coming without obstacles. If you’re childless after infertility, it’s so easy to believe your life will always feel smaller or less significant than those who got to have a child or raise children. You probably haven’t seen many examples ofchildless women living fulfilling, connected lives without kids, so your brain fills in the blanks, telling you that it must be impossible for you. But just because you don’t see the path doesn’t mean it isn’t there. In this episode, you’ll hear: ✨ Why your brain convinces you that a meaningful life after infertility doesn’t exist—and how that belief is just a story, not a fact. ✨ What to do when you feel like you’re staring at a mound of sand that’s blocking everything you wanted. ✨ How learning to trust yourself, even without a roadmap, is the first step to feeling proud of your life again. ✨ The truth about why feeling stuck doesn’t mean you’re broken, it just means you haven’t been shown another way yet. If you’re ready to stop assuming nothing will ever compare to motherhood and start creating a life that feels purposeful and satisfying, this episode will remind you: more is possible, even if you can’t see it yet. Links and Resources Mentioned in This Episode: 🌿 Book Your Free 45-Minute If you want help mapping out where you are now and how to get to a life you feel proud of—even without the children you dreamed of—book your free Thrive Call with Lana here: 👉 Schedule Your Call 🌿 Download Your Free Guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond) This resource will help you feel confident navigating the questions and comments that can make you feel misunderstood or judged: 👉 the Free Guide 🌿 Follow Lana on Social Media for Daily Encouragement and Tools: ✨ ✨ ✨ Whether you’re feeling stuck, disconnected, or unsure how to begin, remember: your dreams didn’t end when motherhood didn’t happen. They are still waiting for you to claim them. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37336890

Your Meaning as a Childless Woman After Infertility 07/02/2025

Your Meaning as a Childless Woman After Infertility Your Meaning as a Childless Woman After Infertility If you ever find yourself waking up on a Saturday, staring at a day that is completely yours and feeling more suffocated than free, this episode is for you. Maybe you spent years picturing weekends packed with soccer games, birthday parties, college visits, and noisy family trips. You imagined how all the hard parts of infertility and IVF would feel worth it once you finally had your baby in your arms. But here you are, childless after infertility, and the quiet moments you thought would feel peaceful just feel heavy. And if you have ever caught yourself actually enjoying your life now, maybe a spontaneous trip, an afternoon reading, or a coffee date with your partner, only to feel instant guilt because you think it “looks bad” to be happy without kids, you are not alone. You might think: I shouldn’t enjoy this because it means I am okay with what happened. I am betraying the woman I was, the one who fought so hard to be a mom. Other people will think I didn’t care enough if I can move on. This episode will remind you: ✨ You are allowed to love parts of your life right now. ✨ You are allowed to find meaning, peace, and purpose, even if motherhood didn’t happen. ✨ You don’t have to spend the next 40 years waiting for something that will never come. Inside this conversation, you will learn: ✔️ Why weekends and free time feel so triggering when you are unexpectedly childless ✔️ How to stop feeling guilty for enjoying what you have now ✔️ Why this struggle doesn’t mean you are broken or that you didn’t want motherhood enough ✔️ How to start creating a life you genuinely love without comparing it to the life you dreamed of This is exactly why I created . is my 12-week coaching program for women who are tired of feeling stuck, invisible, or like life is just happening to them instead of for them. Inside Thrive, you will learn how to: 🌿 Own your time and create experiences that feel expansive and meaningful 🌿 Let go of the guilt that comes when you enjoy your life without children 🌿 Feel connected, confident, and purposeful again on your terms If you are ready to stop surviving and start living, this is your invitation. You don’t have to figure this out alone. 💛 Ready to take the next step? Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call. We will create a plan for what is next so you can start designing a life you love, even though it turned out so differently than you expected. ✨ Book Your Free 🎧 Mentioned in this episode: 💌 Stay connected with me: You are allowed to love this life, even if it broke your heart. You are allowed to build something beautiful, even if it wasn’t the story you planned. And you are allowed to start today. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37252675

Infertile, Childless, and Taking Back Control 06/24/2025

Childless After Infertility: You’re Not Meant to Just Survive This 06/18/2025

Childless After Infertility: You’re Not Meant to Just Survive This If you’ve ever wondered if this is just how life feels when you don’t become a mom, this episode is for you. Maybe your fertility journey ended with heartbreak instead of a baby. Maybe you’ve been told (by the world, by your inner voice) that life will always feel incomplete, lonely, or second-best now. Maybe you scroll past pregnancy announcements and family vacation photos, not because you’re bitter, but because they hurt. And maybe you’ve started to believe the quiet story that society tells women like us: That life without children will always feel like you’re just holding on. But what if that story isn’t true? In episode 172 of The “So Now What?” Podcast, Lana shares: The truth about the emotional aftermath of IVF and infertility that no one talks about. Her own story of navigating the grief of a chromosomally abnormal embryo (Trisomy 16) and what came after fertility treatments ended. Why the world’s attempts to “fix” you with adoption, donor eggs, or surrogacy often leave you feeling more invisible. How guilt, shame, and comparison can keep you frozen in time, and what it takes to finally move forward. You'll hear how women inside her 12-week coaching program, go from surviving each day to actually loving their lives again. One client shares how she stopped obsessing over what people with kids were doing and started finding confidence, peace, and simple joys in her everyday life. This episode invites you to imagine a summer, and a life, where: You wake up excited for your day, not dreading another reminder of what’s missing You reconnect with your body and stop treating it like it failed you You feel connected to your partner again, building a future that feels like yours You finally stop pretending to be okay, and actually are If you’re ready to stop surviving and start living a life that feels meaningful and fulfilling—even without the children you always dreamed of—this episode will show you what’s possible. 💬 Ready to Take the Next Step? Don’t let another summer pass you by in a fog of comparison and sadness. ✨ Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call with Lana to create a plan for what comes next: 👉 This is your first step toward creating a life that fits again...one that you love, even though it turned out differently than you expected. 📲 Stay Connected with Lana 💻 Website & Coaching Info: 📕 Buy the book "So Now What?" ! 📥 Free Download: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and How to Respond) → 📸 Instagram: 🎥 YouTube: 🎵 TikTok: @lana.manikowski /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/37054930

Father’s Day When He’s Childless Too 06/10/2025

Father’s Day When He’s Childless Too If you're a woman who went through fertility treatments like IVF or IUI and now find yourself childless after infertility, this episode will speak directly to your heart. This week, we talk about a quiet kind of grief. The grief carried by the man who never got to become a dad. Whether it's your husband, partner, brother, or someone else close to you, Father’s Day can feel invisible for the men who once dreamed of fatherhood but never got to live it. And if you’ve been focused on your own pain after infertility, you might not have realized how much he’s grieving too. In this episode, you’ll hear: How infertility affects your partner even if he never talks about it Why the guilt you’ve been carrying is not yours to hold anymore Ways to show up for your partner on Father’s Day without it being complicated or performative A reminder that your relationship is still meaningful, even without children 💬 “I thought I was the only one grieving, but I wasn’t. He was just quieter about it.” 📖 Want more support around Father’s Day? Chapter 25 of my bestselling book, So Now What?, is dedicated to helping you understand and support your partner when he didn’t get to become a biological dad. If you’re wondering how to bring up this conversation, how to honor him, and how to let go of the guilt you’ve been carrying, this chapter is for you. 📚 You can read Chapter 1 and the foreword by Jody Day for free: lanamanikowski.com/book 🎁 Free Resource Download: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and How to Respond) Your script for those awkward or painful conversations. 💬 Want help creating a life you love, even if you never became a mom? Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call with me. We’ll create a personal plan to help you move forward with confidence, connection, and purpose. 📲 This week on Instagram, I’m sharing a series called “A Letter to My Childless Husband.” Follow along at If you’re childless not by choice, grieving after infertility, and want to feel more connected to your life and your partner, this episode will help you start. Your story isn’t over. It’s just beginning. #InfertilitySupport #ChildlessAfterInfertility #IVFDidntWork #FatherlessFathersDay #LifeAfterInfertility #SoNowWhat #LanaManikowski #IUIJourney #LifeWithoutChildren #FertilityTreatments /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36937290

Infertility & Goal Fatigue – What to Do When IVF Fails 06/03/2025

Infertility & Goal Fatigue – What to Do When IVF Fails Infertility & Goal Fatigue – What to Do When IVF Fails If you’re childless after infertility and emotionally drained from years of chasing the dream of motherhood through IVF, I want you to know: you’re not alone. And what you’re feeling right now? It makes perfect sense. You spent years setting goals—diagnosis, treatment plans, egg retrievals, embryo transfers, second opinions, supplements, side effects, losses… all in pursuit of the child you dreamed of. But when IVF doesn’t work—and you find yourself childless after all of it—you’re left with a silent question that echoes through your mind: Now what? In this episode of The “So Now What?” Podcast, I’m sharing a deeply personal moment that stopped me in my tracks—one that reminded me how so many of us are living in a state of goal fatigue without even realizing it. It all started with one innocent, thoughtful question from my 13-year-old nephew: “Uncle Jack, what’s your goal for this year?” And that moment led me to a massive realization—what if we’ve been asking the wrong question all along? In this episode, I’ll guide you through: ✅ Why infertility turns us into high-functioning goal-chasers ✅ What “goal fatigue” looks and feels like after IVF fails ✅ Why you might feel disconnected even after big wins at work or in life ✅ How I became a workaholic after IVF ended—and still felt empty ✅ The life-changing power of asking, “How do I want to feel?” ✅ What to do if you don’t even know how you want to feel anymore This conversation is a gentle but powerful invitation to start living from the inside out—not chasing more goals to prove your worth, but learning to feel fulfilled by who you are right now, even without the children you hoped for. 💬 Want to go deeper? ✨ Book your free . If you’ve been feeling stuck, lost, or unsure of how to move forward, I’ll help you reconnect with what matters to you. No pressure. No performance. Just a clear, hope-filled starting point for your next chapter. 📘 Ready to read the book that’s helping women just like you? Check out my new bestselling book, So Now What?—created especially for women who are childless after infertility and looking for purpose, healing, and joy beyond motherhood. Grab your copy or download a free preview here: 👉 🔗 Stay connected: 🎥 Watch this episode on 📸 Connect with me on 📱 Follow along on 🎁 Don’t miss this: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and How to Respond) Get your free copy . You don’t have to chase the next big thing to feel proud of your life. You don’t have to “move on” or pretend it doesn’t hurt. You don’t have to keep pushing to prove that you matter. You’re allowed to feel peace, love, purpose, and joy—even without a child. So if IVF didn’t work and you’re wondering what now… this episode is your starting point. Tune in. And let’s begin—together. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36834605

Childless and Grieving with Jody Day 05/20/2025

Childless and Grieving with Jody Day If you are childless after infertility and wondering how to move forward without the future you dreamed of, this powerful conversation with Jody Day will meet you right where you are. In this episode, we explore what it truly means to grieve childlessness and how embracing that grief can lead to deep healing, creativity, and purpose. Jody shares her personal story, her insights from years of working in the childless-not-by-choice space, and how grief can evolve from something you endure into something you grow through. Inside this episode: Why grief is not an event but a skill What it means to experience disenfranchised grief as a childless woman How to feel seen in a society that avoids your pain What it takes to build your own support network as you age Why asking for help is a form of strength and connection Unforgettable quotes from Jody Day: “Grief is not an event. It’s a skill.” “You’re not needy. You have needs. You’re human.” “We grieve that which we have loved.” “Grief is the emotion that allows us to let go of what was in order to embrace what’s next.” “I look back at the woman who tried so hard and say: You didn’t know more was available to you.” Whether you are early in your grief or further down the path, this episode will remind you that you are not alone, and that you still have the power to build a life you love. You are not too late. You are not alone. You may be childless, but your story still matters. This episode will remind you that healing is possible, connection is available, and the life ahead of you still holds meaning. Helpful links and resources: 🎧 Download: (...and How to Respond) 📞 Book a Free 45-Minute with Lana and create a personalized plan for living a fulfilling life without children 📘 Explore Jody Day’s work: 💌 Subscribe to her Substack: 📱 Follow Lana on , , and TikTok About Jody Day: Jody is the English-Irish founder of Gateway Women, the world’s best-known support and advocacy network for childless women. Often described as the founder of the global childless movement, she is an integrative psychotherapist, two-time TEDx speaker, author, and thought leader. Her best-selling book : How to Find Hope, Meaning and a Fulfilling Future Without Children has become essential reading for women navigating life without motherhood. Jody has been a World Childless Week Ambassador since 2017, was chosen as one of the BBC’s 100 Women in 2013, and named a UK Digital Woman of the Year in 2021. She is a former Fellow in Social Innovation at Cambridge Judge Business School and was a founding board member of the UK charity Ageing Without Children. Today, she writes the popular Substack Gateway Elderwomen, which explores aging and elderhood without motherhood, and is developing her ALTERKIN Project to create local mutual-aid communities for those aging without children. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36648265

Feeling Connection After Infertility 05/13/2025

Feeling Connection After Infertility If Mother’s Day felt hard for you, you’re not alone and this week’s episode of The “So Now What?” Podcast is especially for you. You’ve probably spent years feeling like a party of one, moving through infertility and now life without children, not sure where to go to find connection or how to create it. Maybe you’ve told yourself you should be strong enough to figure this out alone. Maybe you’ve been hiding, thinking you’re the only one whose treatments didn’t end in motherhood. In this powerful episode, you’ll hear why connection is not a luxury, it’s a necessity. You’ll be reminded that you are not weak for wanting support. You are human, and you were never meant to do this alone. Lana opens up about her own journey, from getting an unexplained infertility diagnosis in 2011 and hiding her pain, to walking into silence despite being someone who always had “talks too much” on her report card. You’ll hear how that silence was one of the hardest parts, and why finding your voice again starts with connection. Lana shares what inspired her to start this podcast in 2021, why she left her 20-year corporate career to coach full time, and how her program and The Other’s Day Brunch were created to make sure women like you never have to navigate childlessness alone. You’ll hear about: - What it feels like when connection feels out of reach after infertility - Why fertility clinics gave us science but not the soul-level support we needed - What healing starts to look like when you stop hiding - The incredible stories of women at The Other’s Day Brunch who showed up not knowing a soul and left with new friendships - Simple ways you can say yes to connection today . even if it starts with a coffee invite or replying to a DM This episode is a reminder that even if your life looks different than you planned, it can still be beautiful, because you are part of it. ✨ Resource Mentioned: Download *The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond) . ! 🎧 If this episode resonated with you, please take a moment to rate and review the podcast. Your words help other women find this space. 📲 Connect with Lana on Instagram, TikTok, and YouTube: @lana.manikowski 💌 Questions or feedback? 🌐 Learn more: /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36553595

To the Childless Woman on Mother’s Day 05/06/2025

To the Childless Woman on Mother’s Day If you're feeling overlooked, invisible, or emotionally raw as Mother's Day approaches, this episode was made for you. In this heartfelt and healing conversation, Lana speaks directly to you — the woman who did everything she could to become a mom, but still doesn’t have the child she dreamed of. Whether this is your first Mother's Day since stopping fertility treatments or your fifteenth, this episode holds space for your grief, your story, and your desire to be seen in a world that rarely acknowledges women who are childless not by choice. Lana shares why Mother's Day can be more than just a tough day — it can be a cultural reminder of the life you hoped for and the identity you never got to claim. She talks about the emotional toll of constant reminders — inbox ads, grocery store signs, brunch invites — and why it's not about jealousy or resentment, but a profound sadness that so few people recognize. You’ll also hear: Why your grief is real and valid — even if others don’t understand it What disenfranchised grief is and why it’s so common for childless women How the Other’s Day Brunch was born out of this very longing to be seen Why healing doesn’t mean forgetting, and how grief and joy can coexist What to do this weekend if you're looking for a way to honor your story and take care of yourself Whether you're quietly grieving at home or attending the 4th Annual Other’s Day Brunch in Chicago, this episode is your reminder that you are not alone. 🎧 Listen in if you’ve ever thought: “Why is this still so hard—even after all this time?” “Why does no one acknowledge the pain of being childless on Mother's Day?” “I don’t want pity. I just want to feel like I matter.” 💬 What to do next: 💗 Join us in Chicago for the 4th Annual Other’s Day Brunch on May 10 — a space where you’ll be seen, honored, and celebrated: 👉 www.lanamanikowski.com/othersday 📞 Ready to stop feeling stuck and create a new vision for your future? Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call with Lana and get personalized support for building a life that feels full, even without the children you dreamed of: 👉 https://calendly.com/lanamanikowski/strategy-session 📥 Download Lana’s free guide: ✔️ The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless... and How to Respond with Confidence and Self-Respect: 👉 https://lana-manikowski.myflodesk.com/thingspeoplesay 📲 Follow Lana on social media for community and inspiration: Instagram: TikTok: @lana.manikowski YouTube: ✨ You are not an afterthought. You are a whole woman with a full heart — even if it's still healing. This Mother’s Day, take up space. You belong here. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36456535

Life After Infertility: From Rejection to Redefinition 04/30/2025

Infertile But Not Invisible 04/23/2025

Infertile But Not Invisible If you’ve gone through IVF or fertility treatments and didn’t end up with the child you always dreamed of, this episode is for you. During National Infertility Awareness Week 2025, it’s easy to feel like the spotlight is only on the stories that end in a baby. But what if yours didn’t? What if you're childless after infertility, and you’ve spent years wondering where your voice fits in? This week, we’re finally talking about the part no one wants to say out loud: The silence that follows when fertility treatments don’t work. The awkward comments. The unsolicited advice. The way people try to “fix” you with adoption suggestions, miracle stories, or spiritual shortcuts. But in this episode, you’ll hear what you’ve been longing to hear: You are not an afterthought. You are not a failure. And you are not alone. Lana shares: Why awareness doesn’t always mean inclusion, especially when your journey ends without a child How society struggles to hold space for grief that’s not “fixable” What it’s like to be left without resources or support when you leave your clinic for the last time A reading from Chapter 14 of her new book , called “Avoiding Isolation and Strengthening Existing Connections” What you can do to start reconnecting with yourself and others in an authentic way without having to explain or justify your path Whether you’ve felt misunderstood, judged, or completely invisible, this episode will help you feel grounded, seen, and empowered to move forward, even when life looks nothing like you planned. 🧡 Want to keep going beyond the podcast? Here’s how to get support and stay connected: ➡️ Join me LIVE during National Infertility Awareness Week: April 28 – Infertility, Identity, and the Fight to Be Seen – So Now What? at Indiana University Northwest, 11:30 AM April 28 – Interview on WCPT Radio in Chicago May 1 – Book reading and signing at City Lit Books, 6:30 PM (Logan Square, Chicago) May 10 – The 4th Annual Other’s Day Brunch, a powerful gathering for women without children on the Saturday before Mother’s Day Get all the details at: 🎧 Ready to talk about what’s next for you? Book your free 45-minute Thrive Call with Lana and start mapping out what your future can look like, even if it doesn’t include motherhood. 👉 📚 Haven’t read the book yet? Download the foreword by Jody Day and Chapter 1 of So Now What? 👉 💬 Struggling with how to respond to awkward or hurtful comments? Download the free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and How to Respond) 👉 If this episode spoke to you, please leave a review or share it with someone who needs to hear that a meaningful life is still possible, even without the children they dreamed of. 📲 Connect with Lana on Instagram, TikTok, or YouTube: /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36278435

Infertility Isn’t a Finish Line 04/17/2025

Infertility Isn’t a Finish Line If you’ve been through fertility treatments like IVF or IUI and ended your journey without the baby you dreamed of, you might be waiting for the day you finally feel “healed.” But what if healing isn’t something you ever fully complete? What if infertility isn’t a finish line—but a beginning? In this episode of The “So Now What?” Podcast, you’ll discover that you don’t have to be completely healed to start feeling proud of who you are becoming. You’ll explore how to notice your growth, even on the hard days, and how small steps forward are worth celebrating—even if no one else sees them. I’ll also be sharing details about a few special public events coming up, including a reading from Chapter 11 of my book, , titled “Who Are You Now? Who Do You Want to Become?” This question is at the heart of reclaiming your life after infertility, and I hope it inspires you the way it inspired me. ✨ Upcoming Events (All Open to the Public): 🗓 April 28 at 11:30 AM Speaking at Indiana University Northwest Topic: Infertility, Identity, and the Fight to Be Seen – So Now What? 📚 May 1 at 6:30 PM Book Reading and Signing at City Lit in Logan Square Featuring Chapter 11: “Who Are You Now? Who Do You Want to Become?” 🥂 May 10 at 11:30 AM The 4th Annual in Chicago A celebration for women without children to feel seen, supported, and celebrated 🎟 🎧 Listen now if you’ve ever thought: “I still feel sad, so I must not be healed yet” “I didn’t become a mom, so what do I celebrate about myself?” “I don’t even know who I am without motherhood” This episode is your reminder that you are growing, even if your grief still exists. Your story didn’t end when your treatments did. It just started taking a new shape—one that you get to define. 📞 Ready to take the next step? Book a free 45-minute Thrive Call with me We’ll create a plan together for how to start building a life that feels meaningful without the children you dreamed of. 👉 💬 Free Download The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and how to respond) An authentic and empowering guide to help you feel steady and confident in conversations that often feel uncomfortable. 📥 📲 Stay connected: Instagram: YouTube: TikTok: Website: /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36211395

From Infertility to Impact: Why This Chapter Matters 04/10/2025

From Infertility to Impact: Why This Chapter Matters Have you ever looked around and thought, “So now what?” after years of trying fertility treatments that didn’t work? You’re not alone. This week’s episode is for you. In this deeply personal and empowering episode, you’ll hear Lana reflect on the powerful launch of her new book, So Now What?, which became a #1 New Release in the Fertility and Infertility categories on Amazon. That milestone wasn’t just about sales. It was about finally being heard after years of feeling silenced by a childless outcome. Whether you’ve gone through IVF, IUI, or spent years navigating the complex, emotional rollercoaster of fertility treatments only to leave without a baby, this episode will remind you that your story still matters. You’ll hear: How Lana’s unexpected injury mirrored the unpredictability of infertility Why So Now What? was written for women just like you A powerful reading from Chapter 3 of the book that will leave you feeling seen and understood Why this book belongs in every fertility clinic and how you can help make that happen 🎧 This episode is for you if: You feel like no one talks about what happens after treatment doesn’t work You’re searching for hope, community, and guidance in your childless life You’re ready to believe that your life can still be meaningful even without the children you dreamed of ✨ Help Us Spread the Word Lana is currently sending So Now What? to reproductive endocrinologists, clinics, and therapists. She wants your help reaching more professionals who need this resource. If you know of a doctor, clinic, or support group that could benefit, Lana or send her a DM on , or TikTok 📍 Upcoming Book Events If you’re in the Chicago or Northwest Indiana area, join Lana at one of her upcoming events: April 28 at 11:30 AM – Infertility, Identity, and the Fight to Be Seen at Indiana University Northwest May 1 at 6:30 PM – Book reading at in Logan Square, Chicago May 10 – The Other’s Day Brunch (a celebration for women without children by circumstance, not choice) Get your ticket: 📚 Get Your Copy of So Now What? Available now on: Or visit the new landing page: 💬 Free Download: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless… and How to Respond Tired of awkward, intrusive conversations about your childless status? This free resource will help you feel more confident, clear, and authentic. Download it here: 💬 Remember: You are not behind. You are not broken. You are not alone. Your life still has purpose, joy, and connection ahead. Let this episode be your reminder that your next chapter is waiting to be written. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/36083380

Infertility Takes Everything From You… Or Does It? 03/25/2025

Infertility Takes Everything From You… Or Does It? Are you childless after infertility, feeling stuck in the “in-between” after years of fertility treatments and IVF? Have you spent years yearning for motherhood, only to be left wondering what life looks like now? If that sounds like you, this episode was created with your heart in mind. In Episode 162 of The So Now What? Podcast, I share a deeply personal reflection that started on a seemingly ordinary Saturday. It was a day filled with movement, joy, connection, and the kind of freedom I never expected to feel in a life without children. But by the end of the night, everything changed. That moment forced me to think about what I had built and who I had become. You’ll hear how that experience helped me step even more deeply into ownership of a life I never imagined living, and how you can do the same. 💬 In this episode, you’ll hear: Why your life without children can still feel full, meaningful, and chosen How waiting for time to heal might be keeping you stuck An excerpt from Chapter 9 of my new book called "Learning Not to Fear Change" How fear of failure, shaped by the language of fertility treatments, impacts your ability to move forward Why is already a Top New Best Seller on Amazon before it has even launched A heartfelt invitation to stop waiting and start rebuilding your life 📘 So Now What? is the guide you didn’t know you needed If you’ve ever said, “I thought I’d be a mom by now,” this book was written for you. So Now What? is more than a book. It is a guide, a lifeline, and a blueprint for the woman who never received the tools to navigate a future without motherhood. This book meets you where you are and shows you that you do not have to stay there. It is already being celebrated as a Top New Best Seller on Amazon, even before the official launch on April 2. 🛒 📅 Release Date: April 2 💬 Ready to stop wondering what’s next? If you feel stuck or unsure how to begin, I invite you to schedule a free 45-minute Thrive Call with me. This is your opportunity to map out a personalized plan and walk away with clarity and direction. You will not be asked to have all the answers, only the willingness to start. 📞 Book your free here 🎁 Free Download: Not sure how to respond when people offer advice or make assumptions about your childlessness? Download my free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (...and how to respond) 📥 Get your copy here ❤️ You are not alone If your fertility journey has left you childless, and you feel like you are the only one navigating this unexpected life, this episode will remind you that you are not alone. You have found your community. You have a coach who understands. You have a starting point. Your story is not over. It is just beginning. Let today be the day you take ownership of what is next. 🎧 Press play now and share this episode with someone who needs to hear it. 📱 Let’s stay connected: Instagram: TikTok: @lana.manikowski YouTube: Website: #childlessnotbychoice #infertilitysupport #ivfwarrior #childlessafterinfertility #lifecoachforinfertility #soNowWhat #infertilityjourney #lifeafterivf #thrivingafterinfertility #purposewithoutmotherhood #navigatingchildlessness #ivf /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35850140

Infertile & Childless: The Myths We Believe 03/19/2025

Infertile & Childless: The Myths We Believe 🎙 Listen now to The 'So Now What?' Podcast with Lana Manikowski, Episode 161 So now what? Did these three words race through your mind time and time again during fertility treatments? You poured everything—your energy, your time, your heart—into trying to have a child. But when that dream didn’t come true, you were left wondering: What now? If you've ever felt like motherhood was the missing piece, the thing that would finally make you whole, you are not alone. And today, we’re challenging that belief. In this episode, we’ll explore: ✅ Why focusing on what’s missing keeps you stuck in the absence of a child ✅ How to shift from dwelling in loss to expanding into new possibilities ✅ The false narrative that motherhood completes you—and what actually does ✅ How to rediscover your purpose and joy beyond motherhood You spent years believing that having a child would bring fulfillment. But what if your ability to create a meaningful life was never dependent on motherhood in the first place? You are not incomplete. You are not without purpose. You are just beginning a new chapter—one that is waiting to be fully lived. ✨ Are you ready to step into joy again? Book a free 45-minute Thrive Call with me, where we’ll map out your next steps toward fulfillment and purpose. → 📚 So Now What?, available now on Amazon! This is the resource I wish I had when I realized I would be living a life without children. It’s filled with insights and strategies to help you move forward with confidence. Order today and be one of the first to receive it when it releases on April 2nd! 💌 Get your free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (...and How to Respond) → 🌸 Join us for The Other’s Day Brunch on May 10 in Chicago! A beautiful space for childless women to connect and celebrate a life that is meaningful—without children. Get your tickets here → 💬 Let’s connect! 📌 Instagram: 📌 TikTok: 📌 YouTube: If this episode spoke to you, please take a moment to rate and review the podcast. It helps other women on this journey find the support they need. 🎧 Listen now and remember—you are so much more than this one dream. You have an entire life waiting to be lived fully. 💜 /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35772410

Infertility: Don't Believe Everything You Hear 03/12/2025

Infertility: Don't Believe Everything You Hear You’ve done it all—IVF, IUI, every possible fertility treatment. You’ve spent years hoping, praying, and planning for a baby that never arrived. Now, you find yourself in a place you never prepared for—life without the children you dreamed of. And you keep asking yourself, So now what? If those words have been circling in your mind, you are not alone. I remember when they consumed me. When I was told my only frozen embryo wasn’t viable, I was convinced I had failed at everything. I believed I had let my husband down, that I had cheated my in-laws out of becoming grandparents, and that I would grow old alone, pitied by everyone. Most of all, I believed that my life would never feel full again because I didn’t become a mother. But what if those beliefs aren’t actually true? In this episode, I’m giving you a sneak peek into So Now What?, my upcoming book that I have poured my heart into. It’s not just words on a page—it’s a guide, a companion, and an invitation to create a life you love, even though it looks nothing like what you expected. Today, we’re talking about something that changed everything for me: your beliefs. Are Your Beliefs Holding You Back? The way you see yourself, your future, and your worth is shaped by what you believe. And most of the time, we don’t even realize how much our thoughts are controlling our reality. Do you believe that because you didn’t become a mom, you’ll never experience deep love? Do you believe your marriage is doomed without children? Do you believe that you’ll always be on the outside looking in while your friends celebrate milestones with their families? If you’ve been carrying these beliefs, it’s not your fault. Society, family, religion, and the stories we’ve been told about what makes a woman’s life meaningful have shaped them. But here’s the truth: just because you’ve believed something for a long time doesn’t make it true. I want you to start questioning the beliefs that have been keeping you stuck. Who told you these things had to be true? What if they aren’t? Rewriting Your Story When I first realized that my beliefs were shaping my happiness (or in my case, my deep sadness), I had to do the uncomfortable work of questioning them. I had to ask myself: If I wasn’t a failure, then what? If my life wasn’t actually over, what could it look like? If I didn’t let my husband down, what was still possible for us? These questions were scary, but they were the key to setting myself free. They were the key to creating a life that, while different from what I imagined, is still full, meaningful, and beautiful. In So Now What?, I walk you through exactly how I did this. How I stopped letting these outdated beliefs define me. How I learned to see myself in a new light. How I discovered that I was still whole, still worthy, and still capable of creating a future that felt deeply fulfilling. And if this episode has you realizing that you’ve been carrying beliefs that no longer serve you, let’s talk. Join Me for a Free Thrive Call Maybe no one has ever offered you 45 minutes of their time, free of charge, to help you start creating a plan for your next chapter. But I do. During our Thrive Call, we will: ✅ Look at the beliefs that have been keeping you stuck ✅ Create a plan for what comes next ✅ Start shifting your mindset so you can move forward in a way that feels real and authentic to you You don’t have to keep feeling like your life is over. You don’t have to stay in this place of uncertainty and grief. There is another way forward, and I’d love to help you take that first step. Win a Free Signed Copy of So Now What? I am beyond excited for this book to be in your hands, and I want to give 10 lucky listeners a signed copy for free! Enter the giveaway now: Resources Mentioned in This Episode: 📖 So Now What? (Available April 2) – Preorder coming soon! 📞 Book a Free Thrive Call: 📥 Download The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (...and How to Respond): You are not broken. Your life is not over. You get to create something beautiful for yourself, and I’d love to help you take that first step. 💛 See you next week. Remember, it’s never too late to discover your meaning. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35649530

Childless, Not Less: Happiness Without Justification 03/04/2025

Thrive Without Children – Because You CAN 02/26/2025

Thrive Without Children – Because You CAN If your fertility journey didn’t lead to motherhood, it’s easy to feel like everything else is just second best. After years of IVF, IUI, and trying everything to have a baby, you never imagined navigating a life without children. And now, instead of embracing the opportunities in front of you, you might feel stuck, wondering if true joy, fulfillment, and connection are even possible for you. But here’s the truth: You CAN create a life that feels meaningful, fulfilling, and deeply connected because you CAN. In this episode of The So Now What? Podcast, I’m sharing how my recent injury and surgery forced me to shift my focus from what I can’t do to what I can and how this same mindset shift is essential for embracing your life after infertility. Too many women who are childless after infertility struggle to see the gifts available to them. You might hold back from fully living, believing nothing could ever measure up to motherhood. But when you start doing things because you CAN instead of focusing on what’s missing, you’ll begin to create a life that feels aligned, purposeful, and truly yours. In This Episode, You’ll Learn: ✔️ Why it’s so easy to overlook the opportunities available to you after infertility ✔️ How my experience recovering from surgery helped me reframe what’s possible ✔️ How to stop treating your life as a backup plan and start embracing it fully ✔️ The simple shifts that help you find joy, fulfillment, and meaning without guilt ✔️ How I help my clients in Thrive After Infertility create lives that feel truly theirs You don’t have to stay stuck in the feeling that life without children is less than what it could have been. The things you CAN do, the dreams you CAN pursue, the adventures you CAN take, the ways you CAN show up for yourself are not second best. They are your life. And when you begin to truly live because you CAN, everything starts to shift. Resources & Next Steps for Your Journey: 📖 My new book, So Now What?, is coming out in April! Enter to win a free signed copy 📞 Book a free Thrive Call to start creating a life you love without the children you dreamed of. The Other's Day Brunch is May 10, 2025 in Chicago. to get on the waitlist! 📩 Download my free guide: The Top 27 Things People Say When You Are Childless (...and how to respond). 📲 Follow me on social media for daily inspiration: Instagram → TikTok → @lana.manikowski 🎧 Catch up on past episodes of The So Now What? Podcast. If this episode resonates with you, share it with a friend who needs to hear it. And if you haven’t yet, leaving a review helps more women find this space and know they are not alone. Until next time, remember: You CAN create a life you love because you CAN. 💛 /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35439750

If Not Now, When? Moving Forward After Infertility and IVF 02/18/2025

If Not Now, When? Moving Forward After Infertility and IVF Have you been living in a holding pattern—waiting, hoping, and unsure of when you’ll finally start living again? For years, infertility treatments dictated your schedule. You held off on vacations, skipped girls’ weekends, and put projects on pause, thinking, Maybe by then, I’ll be pregnant. Maybe I’ll have a baby. But now, fertility treatments are behind you, and you’re still feeling stuck. You have ideas of what you could do—remodeling a room, traveling, learning something new—but the energy just isn’t there to start. Why? In this episode, we’re breaking down the three biggest reasons why moving forward can feel paralyzing when you are childless after infertility: 1️⃣ Fear – Making plans for your future feels like closing the door on motherhood, and that’s terrifying. 2️⃣ Comparison – Nothing seems as meaningful as motherhood was supposed to be, so you tell yourself it’s not even worth trying. 3️⃣ Overwhelm – You don’t know where to start, so you keep waiting for the “right time.” But if not now… when? I recently worked with a coaching client who felt this exact way. She had things she wanted to do—remodeling her bathroom, planting a garden, traveling more with her husband—but nothing was on the calendar. It all just felt big. So we mapped it out. What mattered most? What was her first step? When did she want to start? And suddenly, it didn’t feel so overwhelming anymore. This is exactly what we do inside the Thrive After Infertility Mastermind. One of the three core pillars of the program is owning your time—because when you start making intentional choices about how to fill your days, you stop feeling lost in your own life. ✨ Want more guidance? My upcoming book, So Now What?, has an entire chapter dedicated to planning your future in a way that feels meaningful and fulfilling. I’m giving away 10 free signed copies, and you can enter to win using the link in my show notes or by heading to my bio on or . And if you’re ready to take action, book a free Thrive Call with me. We’ll create a personalized plan to help you stop waiting and start moving forward. The time to start is now. 🎧 Listen now, and let’s get you out of that holding pattern! 🔗 Resources Mentioned: 🎁 Enter to Win a Free Copy of My Book: 📖 Grab My Free Guide: 🤍 Book a Free Thrive Call: You don’t have to wait for your life to start. The question is: If not now, when? /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35324995

Infertility and Self-Blame: It’s Time to Let Go 02/12/2025

Handling Pity When You’re Infertile and Childless 02/05/2025

Handling Pity When You’re Infertile and Childless How to Handle Pity When You’re Childless After Infertility If you’ve ever felt the sting of someone’s pity—whether it’s the sad look, the heavy sigh, or the “I just feel so bad for you” comment—you’re not alone. When you’ve been through fertility treatments like IVF and IUI, only to walk away without the child you dreamed of, the last thing you need is for others to make you feel like your life is something to mourn. In this episode of The ‘So Now What?’ Podcast, we’re talking about how to recognize and process both your own feelings of sorrow and the misplaced pity that others place on you. If you’ve struggled with feeling like people see your life as incomplete because you’re childless—not by choice—this conversation is for you. In This Episode, You’ll Learn: 💔 Why feeling sorry for yourself sometimes is okay—and how to move forward without guilt. 🧠 How to stop internalizing other people’s pity—so you don’t start believing their sadness for you. 👀 Why people pity childless women—and how their words are often more about them than you. 🗣️ How to confidently respond when people say things like “I wish you could have had a baby”—without feeling like you have to justify your happiness or explain your sadness. Your life is not something to be pitied. If you’ve ever felt the weight of infertility, failed IVF, and the unexpected reality of a childless future, I want you to know—there is still so much for you. You can create a meaningful, fulfilling life, even though it looks different than you expected. And if you don’t know what that looks like yet? That’s what I help with. Book a free Thrive Call and let’s create a plan that helps you move forward—so you feel connected to your future instead of stuck in the loss of a dream. Links & Resources: 📖 My Book So Now What? is Coming Soon!—Want updates on the release? . 📞 Book a Free Thrive Call—Let’s create a plan to help you thrive after infertility: . 📩 Join My Email List—Get exclusive deals on Thrive After Infertility and weekly encouragement: . 🗂️ Download My Free Guide: 27 Things People Say When You’re Childless (and How to Respond)—So you can handle these conversations with confidence: . You are not alone, and your story is far from over. Let’s release the weight of pity and start embracing what’s next. /episode/index/show/lifeafterivf/id/35158050

IVF Failed You - The "So Now What?" Podcast

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