#42: Emotional Strength Isn’t Built by Crushing Your Feelings
Beyond Success
The trickiest part about healing your inner world is learning to figure out the difference between self-help schticks and true healing. They are often confused with each other - especially by high achievers. And the cost you pay for mixing them up is hefty. Like, for example: * Striving for more and more success even when it feels empty * Sabotaging your relationships at home and at work * Developing a severe case of burnout, numbness, and depression And worst of all: * Tricking yourself into thinking you’re growing when you’re really building more...
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#41: The High Cost of Hiding Your True Emotions
Beyond Success
Many high achievers treat vulnerability as if it’s a four-letter word. And it’s easy to understand why: they’ve been told leaders must keep their emotions in check, and be level-headed and strong in the face of challenges. But the misunderstandings about vulnerability aren’t just unfortunate, they’re devastating. Because they lead to people going numb to their feelings and relationships, all while convincing themselves they’re doing the right thing. In this episode I’m going to cut through the fog and show you what vulnerability really looks like. I’ll explain how vulnerability...
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#40: You’ve Been Lied to About What It Means To Be Emotionally Strong
Beyond Success
Almost everything you’ve learned about emotional “strength” is not only a flat-out lie, but completely backwards. Toughing it out, staying in control, never letting others see you sweat - these aren’t signs of emotional strength, but emotional blindness. And emotional blindness comes with a steep cost that nobody deserves to pay: It leaves you empty, unfulfilled (even after milestone achievements), and depressed. Why? Because the old way of being emotionally strong is really fear in disguise. And fear is the ultimate mind-killer. That’s the bad news. The...
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#39: The Human Shield Excuse: Why Goodness Dies When We Stop Taking Responsibility
Beyond Success
Let’s stop pretending this is just a problem for soldiers and politicians. The “human shields excuse” isn’t just some abstract wartime tactic—it’s the same twisted reasoning people use every day to justify hurting others, dodging accountability, or compromising their integrity. It’s what lets you blow up a relationship and blame the other person for making you do it. It’s how you rationalize crossing a line—then sleep at night because technically, it wasn’t your fault. In war, this excuse gets innocent people killed. In your life, it’s killing your peace of mind,...
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#38: Success Doesn't Heal Shame: Why the Hustle Kills Emotional Strength
Beyond Success
Too many people are numb to life, unable to enjoy themselves and their relationships even if they’ve achieved great things. The real problem isn’t intelligence, skill, or drive. It’s a failure to process emotions properly because they’ve lost the ability to use their “heart-mind.” Sadly, most of us have been subtly conditioned to not even know we’re approaching this all wrong. Thankfully, you can learn how to regain clarity of your heart-mind. And once you do, and stick with it, the results are astounding. In today’s episode, I’ll share three key ideas about your...
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#37: The Books That Helped Me Stop Proving Myself and Start Living for Real
Beyond Success
The Achiever’s Curse is a deadly one. It starts subtle at first. But left unchecked long enough, it seeps into every aspect of your life, stealing joy and fulfillment every step of the way. Too many achievers don’t realize this insidious curse until they feel the intense pangs of regret on their deathbed. Far too late, in other words. I want to help you avoid this terrible fate… I have read well over 1,000 books in my life - spanning across psychology, philosophy, leadership, business, religion, spirituality, personal growth, and more. Most of them were interesting. A...
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#36: The Hidden Reason Smart People Make Terrible Life Decisions
Beyond Success
Perhaps the most important skill an intelligent person can learn is the Dao of Decision Making. Making tough, high-stakes decisions doesn’t come naturally to high achievers because they’ve been fooled into valuing their intelligence more than their emotions. But every decision has its roots in emotions… and relying solely on logic and data for these decisions is a quick way to make a decision that wrecks your marriage, your internal harmony, and even your future fulfillment. In other words, there is a better way to access the deep kind of wisdom that makes the answer to...
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#35: The Silent Way Emotional Avoidance Destroys Success
Beyond Success
High achievers are vulnerable to emotional avoidance. It’s subtle, sneaky, and seductive. It tricks you into thinking you’re making progress or crushing goals. But when everything feels flat - no matter how big the accomplishment - it’s a sign that you’re under the spell of emotional avoidance. And emotional avoidance comes with a devastating cost: Losing the entire gamut of your emotions. That might sound alluring at first, until you realize the full cost. It’s not just mental, but physical too. In fact, it could put you in the ground long before your time. But...
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#34: Why Smart, Driven People Struggle Emotionally (& How to Finally Break Free)
Beyond Success
Most high achievers learned at a young age that emotions were distractions. This early lesson inspired much of their success… but it came at a terrible cost: It develops emotional blindspots that quietly, patiently, and relentlessly sabotage you. Here’s the thing about emotional blindspots: No matter how much you try to stuff them down and pretend they don’t exist, they don’t simply disappear. Instead, they move underground. They become sneakier. More insidious. And more sabotaging. Worst part? There’s only one way to address your emotional blindspots in a way that...
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#33: The Myth of Emotional Toughness: Why Suppressing Feelings is Weak, Not Strong
Beyond Success
Most high achievers take pride in the fact that they’re not too emotional. They stay cool under pressure, act like nothing bothers them, wear their emotional armor like a badge. But one day, they wake up and realize that they’re a mere observer of their life. They’re not actually living their own life. Instead, they feel empty, like something’s missing that they can’t quite put their finger on. Worst part? They don’t realize that the emotional armor they wore so proudly is the exact thing preventing them from experiencing all the good life has to offer: Joy, love,...
info_outlineAfter helping hundreds of thousands of people, from 87 different countries, find fulfillment, happiness and meaning in their personal and professional lives, I’ve decided to start a new journey to help you do the same.
Beyond Success is a brand-new show that explores the ideas that lead to lasting happiness and fulfillment—not just short-lived “success.”
If you’ve succeeded on the outside but feel like something deeper is missing, this show will pave the road for your happiness and fulfillment on the inside.
In this introductory episode, I reveal the key concepts and ideas that we’ll discuss on this podcast, explore how to invite more joy into your life, and shatter some of the biggest myths keeping you successful, yet unfulfilled.
Listen now.
Show Highlights Include:
- Are you successful on the outside but feel like something deeper is missing? Here’s how to feel fulfilled and successful (1:10)
- Why striving for perfection fast tracks you towards failure (and why focusing on this instead unlocks true happiness) (2:32)
- Is there a way to enjoy life and achieve your goals with more ease and efficiency? Yes, and here’s how to do it (3:21)
- How embracing your emotions (instead of instantly shutting them down) improves your decision-making process (3:49)
- The single most dangerous word in the English language for your joy (4:19)
For more about David Tian, go here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/about/
Emotional Mastery is David Tian's step-by-step system to transform, regulate, and control your emotions... so that you can master yourself, your interactions with others, and your relationships... and live a life worth living. Learn more here: https://www.davidtianphd.com/emotionalmastery