MFP 325: Let’s Get Intimate…
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
Release Date: 03/17/2025
MFP 339: Movies, kids, and imagination
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
"Fairy tales do not tell children the dragons exist. Children already know that dragons exist. Fairy tales tell children the dragons can be killed." - G.K. Chesterton Summary Movies shape more than behavior — they form the imagination, the moral compass, and the heart. Catholic parents are not merely protecting innocence; they are cultivating virtue and wonder. In this episode, we explore how stories shape our children, how to choose wisely, and how to use movies as part of a rich Catholic family culture. Jesus used stories to teach. So do we. Key Takeaways Here are four...
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MFP 338: Sharing the “Mental Load”?
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
Motherhood changes you because it literally alters a woman’s brain—structurally, functionally, and in many ways, irreversibly. - Louann Brizendine, The Female Brain Summary Women are gifted in a way that men are not. Women can hold many different tasks in their mind at the same time, see the needs of others, and know the needs of the household and balance them all. Sometimes this can feel empowering, but sometimes it's overwhelming, especially in times of great stress. In some circles, there is a call for men to share the “mental load”, but is that even...
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MFP 337: The Invincible Family
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
“True power is not dependent upon the invented honors of earth. True power is that which guides, shapes, carves, and claims the souls of men. And the souls of men are most often won and lost at the feet of mothers.” - Kimberly Ells Summary Does it feel like its harder to be a parent today than ever before? There are powers arrayed against the family - powers in secular philosophies, modern politics, and even our education system. The roots of these forces are deep and have been growing for years, but we are just now seeing their ugly fruit. We would like you...
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MFP 336: What Would You Say to Your Younger Self? An Interview with Suzanne Bilodeau
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
God has selected you uniquely to be the mother for these children. He will equip you for the work He wants you to do! Summary No one feels prepared to be a parent. Even if you were one of the oldest of 10 kids in a Catholic family (like Alicia or Katie) or a family of 7 (like Suzanne) you can never really be ready! The key to surviving, and even thriving, is stepping fully into your identity as a daughter of God. All the love that we have for our spouse and children needs to come from a deep place of confident love from our Heavenly Father. Listen in to this...
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MFP 335: Safety-ism
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
'Cause I love you more than you could know And your heart, it grows every time it breaks I know that it might sound strange But I wish you pain - “Wish You Pain” by Andy Grammar Summary Every parent wants to keep their kids safe, but is it possible to keep them “too safe”? In this podcast episode we dive into the overwhelming cult of safety-ism, which makes keeping your child from all pain and suffering an idol. Children are really “antifragile” - meaning that they need to have an appropriate amount of stress physically, mentally and emotionally to be able to...
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MFP 334: An Addiction, a Marriage, and a Priest
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
Our vows are for life, and we need overwhelming grace to live them out - Kevin Wells Summary If you ever thought your marriage was in such bad shape that you simply did not know what to do, this podcast is for you. We were so blessed to be able to talk to Kevin Wells, the author of The Hermit: The Priest Who Saved a Soul, a Marriage, and a Family. This interview is deep because Kevin and his wife Krista have been through the fire together and it is only by the grace of God that they both survived. Our discussion includes the indissolubility of the marriage vows, how...
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MFP 333: The Family Meeting
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
What is the rhythm of leadership in your family? Summary Every relationship relies on communication, but when you operate as a family with many members, communication can become difficult! Kids can get lost in the chaos, plans get forgotten, chores undone, and mom and dad are constantly putting out fires. In comes the miracle of the Family Meeting! Well, let’s rephrase that… A family meeting will not solve ALL your problems but it is a great step forward in leading your family and living life intentionally. In this podcast, we discuss the REAL purpose of a...
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MFP 332: The Seven Marks of Christian Forgiveness
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
If forgiveness isn’t hard, you aren’t doing it right - Dan Meola Summary Many parents struggle with their children--not because of the kids, but because of the wounds they are carrying from their own parents. The only path for healing those wounds is forgiveness. But how do we forgive, especially when the hurts are deep and real? In this podcast we sat down with Dan Meola, the founder of Life Giving Wounds, a ministry for adult children of divorce. We talked about the importance of forgiveness, what it is--and what it is not. To define true...
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MFP 331: Let’s Talk About Husbands! Listener questions answered
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
“If we accept that God’s love is unconditional, that the Father’s love cannot be bought or sold, then we will become capable of showing boundless love and forgiving others even if they have wronged us” - Pope Francis in Amoris Laetitia Summary: Becoming a husband and father is the biggest change a man goes through in his life. There is simply no better “life-coaching” than family life! But when men find their vocation difficult, it is usually their wives that they turn to or who observe this difficulty and have a desire to help. In this podcast, we hear from...
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MFP 330: What Will Your Children Remember?
Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family
“You’re not just parenting your children… you are parenting your grandchildren” Summary Have you ever walked through a thousand-year-old castle or along a wall built by Romans nearly a millennium ago? On a recent trip to the UK, we were struck by the longevity of these structures—and the intentionality behind them. They weren’t built to last a season, but centuries. In this episode, we challenge you to think the same way about your family culture. Are you parenting just for today… or are you building something that will bless your children, grandchildren, and...
info_outline“Lovemaking puts flesh on the vows that we exchange in marriage” - Byron and Francine Pirola
Summary
A few years ago in Australia, we met an amazing couple who we immediately wanted to share with our listeners. Byron and Francine Piroloa from Smart Loving, are on a mission to make marriages stronger all over the world and they are willing to talk about that subject that few couples will tackle - physical intimacy. We aired this podcast five years ago and it got such a great response that we decided to put it up again for all of you. Listen in as we talk to the Pirolas about how and why you should make time for sex, how the arousal pattern for men is different from women and why sex gets better and better the longer you are married! This is a podcast filled with wisdom, but also laughter and honesty. We hope you will enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed talking to them!
Key Takeaways
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Anything precious and unique needs rules to be protected. That is why the Church gives us boundaries in this area to teach us how to be appropriately vulnerable in our marital relationships
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A person’s sexual prime is in their 20s, but our erotic prime is reached in our 50s. This is a culmination of our relationship and our intimacy that is built over time.
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Sexual relations can slip into the “recreational” category in our minds when we are trying to survive. The antidote is seeing sex as a sacred communication that needs to be prioritized.
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Desire, arousal, climax, resolution is a typical male pattern. For most women the pattern is different - arousal, or foreplay, creates desire in the woman.
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We need to work and train our brains to connect with our spouse emotionally, to be present, so the intimacy that we share emotionally and physically.
Couple Discussion Questions
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How are we creating a romantic environment in our relationship? Where are we making space for marital relations?
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How are we opening our hearts to our spouse in lovemaking? Can we work on being present to our spouse and retrain our brains to focus on them?
Resources