Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

Parenting is not a clean-cut, simple process for those who like to follow the rules. Family life is messy and unpredictable, but it is the greatest adventure you will ever have. We are Mike and Alicia Hernon, parents of 10 children ranging from 10 to 27 and we would like to invite you into some of the conversations we have had with each other about marriage, parenting, and Catholic family life. Our hope is that our conversation sparks a dialogue between you and your spouse that leads to greater unity and intentional Christian parenting in your home. Listen in to our podcast and start the conversation as we seek to lead our families to heaven. Visit us at https:///www/MessyFamilyProject.org for resources, guides, links and show notes.

MFP 331: Let’s Talk About Husbands! Listener questions answered 05/05/2025

MFP 331: Let’s Talk About Husbands! Listener questions answered “If we accept that God’s love is unconditional, that the Father’s love cannot be bought or sold, then we will become capable of showing boundless love and forgiving others even if they have wronged us” - Pope Francis in Amoris Laetitia Summary: Becoming a husband and father is the biggest change a man goes through in his life. There is simply no better “life-coaching” than family life! But when men find their vocation difficult, it is usually their wives that they turn to or who observe this difficulty and have a desire to help. In this podcast, we hear from women who have questions about how to support and help their husbands overcome challenges at work, at home, and in their personal lives. So many wives want their husbands to be the best men they can be and overcome vices of sloth, anger, and lust but they aren’t sure how to help. Sometimes wives can take action, but in other situations, it's best for wives to be supportive and keep their advice to themselves. When do you know which is right? Listen in to find out! Key Takeaways Wives need to be very careful when it comes to giving husbands advice or correction regarding his relationship with work. It is a source of great respect for men, so this topic should be delicately considered. Men need to be needed. If wives are doing everything and then complaining that he isn’t stepping up, realize that you are probably doing too much. Overcoming anger requires introspection and being curious about why it arises within you at certain times. Usually the “trigger” is not really your child, but something that your child is doing or saying that is touching an unresolved issue in yourself. We need to take time to think about these things and give ourselves space to consider them and bring God into that situation so He can heal us. If you have a husband who is at a different place spiritually than you, be patient. Honor his journey as being different from your own. /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/36421465

MFP 330: What Will Your Children Remember? 04/28/2025

MFP 329: Who is “God the Father”? 04/21/2025

MFP 328: Let Your Life Be a Witness, An interview with Chris and Molly McMahon 04/14/2025

MFP 328: Let Your Life Be a Witness, An interview with Chris and Molly McMahon "Never be embarrassed to love your wife." – Chris McMahon Summary What does it take to build a thriving business and a strong marriage at the same time? In this episode, Mike sits down with longtime friends Chris and Molly McMahon—financial advisors, founders, parents of five, and marriage warriors. Together, they unpack the real story behind balancing ambition with family, building a faith-filled home without a perfect blueprint, and making decisions that prioritize your marriage even when the world says otherwise. From the mess of early parenthood and maxed-out credit cards to spiritual renewal and raising adult kids with a legacy of love, the McMahons share wisdom from 36 years of marriage. Get ready for candid stories, practical advice, and heartfelt encouragement for couples trying to do it all without losing what matters most. Topics include: Why full transparency is non-negotiable in marriage How to prioritize your spouse even in seasons of hustle Reclaiming Sundays and breaking free from the “frantic family” pace Making faith central—even in business And don’t miss your chance to sign up for the Family Board Meeting, a transformative way to lead your family with intention: Key Takeaways Put your spouse first. Connect with them and make them a priority no matter what is happening at work. Talk about your spouse with love and respect always to others. Be a witness in the workplace. Put up a sacred image, hold a high standard for yourself and be bold about sharing your faith. Never accept the standards of the world for success. If you feel like both of you “have” to work to get ahead or buy a house, don’t accept that! Think outside the box Make time for the things that matter. Be intentional with how you spend your time and money. If God has blessed you, be a blessing to others. God will give you a mission - respond! Couple Discussion Questions How can we use our time intentionally to prioritize each other? How can we live in a way that puts our marriage first? What is the mission that God is asking us to go on two by two? What is the particular way we can serve Him as a married couple? /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/36120895

MFP 327: Five Steps to Give You More Time 04/07/2025

MFP 327: Five Steps to Give You More Time The only way to not live constantly in the Urgent is to manage those things that are Important. Summary “How are you?” “BUSY!” Isn't that the response so many of us give when asked this question? How did we all get so busy and how do we get off the crazy train? Parents have as much time as anyone else (even though it doesn’t feel like it!) but they need to be more conscious than anyone else regarding how they spend the precious time they have. In this podcast, we give five steps that parents can use right now to use their time wisely. Using the Eisenhower matrix of Important/Urgent we will show you how to manage those things that are Important (children and all their needs!) so we aren’t always living in the Urgent. Parents must be careful on how they spend time because days turn into weeks, and then years, and then kids are gone! Childhood is short and we need to be very intentional on how we spend our precious time with our precious children. Key Takeaways We all need to evaluate how we are spending our time. If you always feel like you are putting out important fires, then you need to learn how to manage those things so your life isn’t always “urgent”. To make sure you take care of those relationships that are essential in your life, you have to schedule an appointment. Put on your schedule prayer time, date night, special time. One essential way to live a balanced life is to create routines that will build good habits for you and your children. Make your time purposeful. It's not always about the quantity of time, it's also the quality of that time. Keep in mind your mission! The mission of your family is to confer identity, belonging and purpose upon your children. If you don’t do it, they will seek that out from others and that is a scary prospect. Couple Discussion Questions Let’s evaluate our time. Are always putting out fires? Do we feel our life is frantic? How can we identify pain points and create routines to address them? What is the best way to use our time together? What are the needs in our marriage and how can we satisfy those needs when we are together? How can we use our time better with our children? What would they like to do? /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35924815

MFP 326: The Art of Raising Humans 03/24/2025

MFP 326: The Art of Raising Humans "God gives us our children to heal and transform us." - Kyle Wester Summary In many ways, being a parent is less about our kids and more about our own formation! When we lean into the vocation of parenthood, God can use every experience with our children to show us His love and to form us into the person He has created us to be. In this podcast, we talk to Kyle and Sara Wester, counselors and hosts of the podcast The Art of Raising Humans. During our conversation, they explained four different parenting styles that we move in and out of depending on our life circumstances, how our marriage is actually the most important parenting tool we have, and how our understanding of who we are in the eyes of God affects how we relate to our kids. This podcast is full of great insights for parents and we know you will gain from the Wester’s wisdom. Key Takeaways Children need to be taught relationship skills and correct behavior. The most powerful way they learn is by watching how you relate to your spouse. God gives us our children to heal and transform us. To love our children effectively, we need to first receive God’s love for us personally. Every conflict with our spouse or children is about expectations. When our child exhibits behavior that is inappropriate for a situation, we need to ask ourselves, “What is this behavior telling me about this child?” Discipline comes from discipleship and the foundation of discipleship is relationship. We all must work on having a deep and rich relationship with our children to form them. There are 4 different parenting styles that we move through depending on our life circumstances. We don’t always choose what is best, but we can keep in mind the goal of Loving Guidance and move towards that. Recommended books from the Westers: Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids by Dr. Laura Markham Easy to Love, Difficult to Discipline by by Rebecca Bailey Playful Parenting by Lawrence Cohen No Drama Discipline by Daniel J. Siegel and Tina Payne Bryson Couple Discussion Questions Are we happy with how we are modeling conflict resolution for our children? How can we do this better? What in our children do we see in ourselves? Write these things down. Do we love these things in ourselves? Why or why not? Resources: Facebook - Instagram - TikTok - /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35709685

MFP 325: Let’s Get Intimate… 03/17/2025

MFP 325: Let’s Get Intimate… “Lovemaking puts flesh on the vows that we exchange in marriage” - Byron and Francine Pirola Summary A few years ago in Australia, we met an amazing couple who we immediately wanted to share with our listeners. Byron and Francine Piroloa from Smart Loving, are on a mission to make marriages stronger all over the world and they are willing to talk about that subject that few couples will tackle - physical intimacy. We aired this podcast five years ago and it got such a great response that we decided to put it up again for all of you. Listen in as we talk to the Pirolas about how and why you should make time for sex, how the arousal pattern for men is different from women and why sex gets better and better the longer you are married! This is a podcast filled with wisdom, but also laughter and honesty. We hope you will enjoy listening as much as we enjoyed talking to them! Key Takeaways Anything precious and unique needs rules to be protected. That is why the Church gives us boundaries in this area to teach us how to be appropriately vulnerable in our marital relationships A person’s sexual prime is in their 20s, but our erotic prime is reached in our 50s. This is a culmination of our relationship and our intimacy that is built over time. Sexual relations can slip into the “recreational” category in our minds when we are trying to survive. The antidote is seeing sex as a sacred communication that needs to be prioritized. Desire, arousal, climax, resolution is a typical male pattern. For most women the pattern is different - arousal, or foreplay, creates desire in the woman. We need to work and train our brains to connect with our spouse emotionally, to be present, so the intimacy that we share emotionally and physically. Couple Discussion Questions How are we creating a romantic environment in our relationship? Where are we making space for marital relations? How are we opening our hearts to our spouse in lovemaking? Can we work on being present to our spouse and retrain our brains to focus on them? Resources /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35708135

MFP 324: Moving from Isolation to Unity 03/10/2025

MFP 324: Moving from Isolation to Unity Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. Genesis 2:24 Summary Unity between man and woman was God’s original plan, but the Fall not only broke our relationship with God, it also broke our relationship with each other. But the good news is that Jesus has given us grace in the sacrament of Matrimony so we can have a oneness in marriage that would be impossible otherwise! With unity, couples can handle anything life dishes out. Without it, even the easy things will seem hard. Couples need to constantly be striving for unity, because if spouses aren’t intentional, those marriages will drift apart! In this podcast, we will give you three tools - honoring, forgiveness, and vulnerability - that you can use to start moving towards your spouse. We need to intentionally use these tools to work towards the greater unity within the gift of marriage that God has for us. Key Takeaways All couples must strive for unity - if you float along, you will drift apart Unity was what we were made for, but the fall introduced distrust into the male/female relationships There are three things you can do to move towards unity: honoring, forgiveness, and vulnerability On the scale of Affirmation/Criticism, choose to honor your spouse, even publicly to build them up On the scale of Resentment/Forgiveness, choose to forgive them instead of being resentful of their shortcomings On the scale of Detachment/Intimacy we need to choose vulnerability and openness to our spouse. Couple Discussion Questions On a scale of 1-10, how are we doing in our unity? In which of the three areas can we do better? Which one of these three areas is the most challenging for me? Why do I think that is? Resources Free Mini-Marriage Retreat: Register for the Family Board Meeting! Easter Webinar Register here…. /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35560600

MFP 323: Desires, Vices, and Holiness for Parents 03/03/2025

MFP 323: Desires, Vices, and Holiness for Parents Vices are our disordered way of fulfilling our God-given good desires. Summary So many of us thought we were good people till we had kids, right? This is because kids expose our weaknesses and we need to be aware of them in order to overcome them. Listen in as we reveal Satan’s plan for you and lay out God’s great plan of using our rightly ordered desires to develop virtues and live according to His plan. The desires that God has put in our hearts for dignity, communion, justice, and peace are all good, but when we try to fulfill them on our own, they can lead to vice, or repeated bad habits. We do this because we are all fallen, wounded people! But the good news is that we just need to tap into learning how to satisfy those desires in the best way, which is what God intended for us. This is a snapshot from our video series we are doing for our Cana90 Fellowship this year. In that series, each vice gets its own video where we break it down and show how we as parents are particularly susceptible to falling into it. or the rest of the series! Key Takeaways Vices are our disordered desires. Every vice has a longing or desire behind it and a corresponding virtue to help overcome it. Parents struggle with vices in particular ways that may not have been evident before they had kids. Envy is the longing for Dignity and it comes from the fear that we will not be seen, known, and acknowledged. We get this from our Heavenly Father! Sloth is the longing for Peace and it causes us to choose a “fake peace” that comes from ignoring problems instead of working through them. Couple Discussion Questions Where do I struggle to act? What situations would I rather ignore than deal with? Write down some ideas. Try them each day one at a time. What is one thing I can do to make this room/situation/gathering better? How can I be proactive? Think of when someone else was kind to you. How did it make you feel? List 25 things you can do to make the lives of others around you more pleasant References Bishop Barron’s series on the Seven Deadly Sins Broken Gods by Dr. Gregory Popcak Cana90 Fellowship /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35494670

MFP 322: Dealing with Mouthy Teens 02/24/2025

MFP 322: Dealing with Mouthy Teens A problem with disrespect from a child always goes back to a dysfunction in the parent-child relationship. Summary When our sweet children enter the teen years and adolescence is upon them, something happens that tends to cause parents stress and dismay - back talk and disrespect. Some of this is immaturity on the part of the child and some is simply lack of training in relationships. It is our job as parents to teach our children how to express their feelings, disagree, and even debate while maintaining an attitude of respect towards us and therefore, other people in their lives. The family is the training ground for life! In this podcast we will give you some perspective on the struggles teens have, tell you what NOT to do and explain the Three C’s of responding to a mouthy teen. Listen in! Key Takeaways A disrespectful child is, simply put, someone no one wants to be around. But the good news is that parents can change this! We can help our child become someone we not just love, but like. Yelling, punishing, taking things personally, and debating with your teen does not work. Avoid these reactions. Tweens and teens need us to guide them on acceptable ways of speaking to others. This will help them be successful in many areas of life. CONTROL YOURSELF - If you are triggered by your teen and fly off the handle, ask yourself why and get your emotional life in order. CONSEQUENCES - It is our responsibility to help them see what happens when they don’t control their tongue. The world’s consequences will be much harder than ours! COACH - We need to point our teens towards adulthood so they can see we are not treating them as a child, we are teaching them how to be an adult. Couple Discussion Questions Are we happy with the way that our children speak to us? Can we identify areas of difficulty with them? What would be a quick, acceptable consequence for our child’s disrespect? Which one of us would be best to talk to them about this? How can we coach our child to do better? Links: Link to Cana90 https://messyfamilyproject.org/programs/cana90/ Link to Beloved Event https://arrayofhope.regfox.com/beloved /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35397725

MFP321: Fifty Years and Going Strong! 02/17/2025

MFP321: Fifty Years and Going Strong! A husband and wife may disagree on many things, but they must absolutely agree on this: to never, ever give up. Summary When we did our listener survey, you asked for interviews of regular families who have raised children through to adulthood with grace and courage. Well, we have a treat for you! A few years ago we met Brian and Joanna Simpson of London ONT who have run the Family Foundations Institute for the past 25 years. They also have 9 children and over 35 grandchildren and they are a witness to the goodness of God despite difficulty and heartache. In this episode, they tell some of their story, but also give wisdom to young families on what should be the most important things in your home and how to create a home focused on God and loving each other. We really enjoyed our time with them and we know you will too! Key Takeaways Forgiveness in the family is key - modeling it for the children with them and with your spouse. The husband as the head of the household is the one who carries the responsibility in the family, not only authority. Wise spouses realize that the best decisions are done together in unity. When tragedy and suffering happens in the family, as it inevitably will, God can still be present and make something truly beautiful out of it when we trust Him. Personal prayer and trust in God’s love for you is key to building a family of faith and prayer. When our conflict stays in the dark, the Evil One has more power. It is best to be honest and vulnerable, even if you don’t do it perfectly, because then you can work to actively build unity. Couple Discussion Questions What things are important to us in our household and how are we communicating that? How do we support each other in our roles as husband and wife/mom and dad in the family? Resources: Family Foundations Institute Link to Cana90 Link to Beloved Event /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35298075

MFP 320: Super Habits for the Family 02/10/2025

MFP 320: Super Habits for the Family Summary Have you ever wanted to stop yelling at your kids? Be more courteous to your spouse? Or be more orderly at home? Enter Super Habits! These are not just new things for you to learn to do, these are life-changing actions that will make you happier, healthier and more successful in many areas. In this interview, we spoke to Dr. Andrew Abela, author of the book Super Habits and his wife Kathleen who explained to us how to apply this book to family life. They gave us some great insights and showed us how Super Habits can be the answer to what we all need in our parenting and marriages. And the best part is that these habits are already present in us, we just need to activate them. Listen in! Key Takeaways Every virtue is a habit anyone can cultivate, not just a characteristic or personality trait. We can all grow and change. All new habits create new neurological pathways in our brains, but the advantage of Super Habits is that these are pathways that are native to us already, we already have the “muscles”; we just need to use them. Super habits do three things - they make us happier, healthier, and they have a positive effect on multiple areas of our lives. St. Thomas Aquinas has the best system of organizing the virtues! We all need fluency in the language of virtues. All growth in Super Habits is slow and steady so keep going! Virtue happens when we channel our desires correctly - not squash them. Growth in Super Habits is the answer to “helicopter” or “bulldozer” parenting We need to be aware of the full range of virtues for the full flourishing of the human person. Couple Discussion Questions In what ways have we already developed some Super Habits? How did we do that? What Super Habit will help us in our parenting? How can we support each other in cultivating it? Resources : sophiainstitute.com/product/super-habits/ : : superhabit.substack.com/ - messyfamilyproject.org/programs/cana90/ - arrayofhope.regfox.com/beloved /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35211550

MFP 319: How Husbands Lead 02/03/2025

MFP 319: How Husbands Lead Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord. Eph 6:4 In this episode of the Messy Family Podcast, hosts Mike and Alicia Hernon celebrate their 10th year of the podcast and introduce the new studio, setting the stage for a discussion on fatherhood and leadership in the home. They emphasize that while fathers are called by God to lead, many struggle to understand what that truly means in a world that often undermines their role. True leadership is not about domination but about serving, sacrificing, and guiding with love, following Christ’s example. A father’s success is measured by the unity in his marriage and family, and when discord arises, it signals a need to recalibrate leadership. Mike and Alicia challenge men to overcome passivity, a struggle rooted in Adam’s sin, and to step up, protect, and guide their families with intentional love. Practical steps for dads include pursuing their wives first, taking initiative in family life, loving sacrificially, and leading with unity in mind. They highlight research showing that a father’s presence has a profound impact on his children’s faith, success, and well-being. While many men feel incompetent in the home, undervalue their influence, or struggle with passivity, Mike and Alicia encourage them to embrace the God-given mission of fatherhood with confidence, knowing that great men and strong fathers are desperately needed today. Key Takeaways Husbands are called to lead in the home because this is how God is going to make them holy and you were created to give first to be able to receive. You know you are leading when there is unity, when you are challenged, and when your wife feels safe. Men need to go in to battle and fight against the tendency to be passive or to avoid what they do not feel competent at. Never doubt how important you are in the life of your wife and children - they need you! Couple Discussion Questions Are we happy with our roles of leading our family right now? How are we doing? How can I (wife) support you (husband) in leading our family? For more information on this and other topics visit: https://www.messyfamilyproject.org/ /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/35121630

MFP 318: Families as Missionaries 01/27/2025

MFP 317: Who are These Messy Families? 2024 Survey Summary 01/20/2025

MFP 316: A Manual for Catholic Families 01/13/2025

MFP 316: A Manual for Catholic Families “Catholic parenting is above all a work of grace” - Fr. Carter Griffin We often say there is no manual for being a parent, but this book comes pretty close! In this podcast, we interview the author of Forming Families, Forming Saints Fr. Carter Griffin. Fr. Griffin has worked for years forming young men into priests in the seminary setting. In doing so, he saw many similarities between what he was doing with young men and what parents were doing at home. The four pillars of formation in the seminary - human, intellectual, spiritual, and apostolic - can be applied in the family as well! In both settings, ultimately God is the one who does the transforming in people’s lives, but He does choose to use us in the process. We believe this book is a valuable resource for parents that they will be able to refer to again and again. Key Concepts Parents are proxies. God is the ultimate shaper of their hearts and minds, but He chooses to use us in the lives of our children In the past decade or so there has been an emphasis on the importance of childhood and parenting on a person’s life. This knowledge is good, but it also has put an incredible amount of pressure on parents to “do it right”. The four pillars of seminary formation - Human, Spiritual, Intellectual, and Apostolic can be applied for parents forming children within the home. The most successful parents create an environment of trust in the home through continual dialogue with their children while sending the message that they don’t just love their kids, but they like them too! Parents need to know they are not alone! There are many other families working alongside you and we have a great cloud of witnesses cheering us on. Couple Discussion Consider the four pillars that Fr. Griffith describes. How is our child doing in each of these? Can we make a goal for them in each area? Are we overwhelmed by the responsibility of parenting? How can we rely on God more for the grace that we need and for the grace that our children need? Resources Find out more about our UK tour in March - Event in New Jersey with Array of Hope - Beloved /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/34808215

MFP 315: 10 Things to Stop Doing in 2025 01/07/2025

MFP 314: Seasons of Prayer for Parents 12/16/2024

MFP 313: Surviving the Holidays with Grace 12/09/2024

MFP 312: The Well Ordered Family 12/02/2024

MFP 311: Family Roots - Mike's Irish Experience 11/25/2024

MFP 311: Family Roots - Mike's Irish Experience In this episode, we dive into the beauty and power of family history. Mike shares the incredible story of his journey to Ireland—a dream rooted in a deep love for his heritage and a promise to pass it on to his children. From the ruins of his grandfather’s cottage to the windswept cliffs of the Aran Islands, the trip becomes a testament to the importance of staying connected to the past while building a legacy for the future. As we reflect on the stories of those who came before us, we’re reminded of the sacrifices and struggles that shaped who we are today. Alicia and Mike discuss how understanding our roots can ground us in our present and inspire us to leave a rich legacy for those who will follow. Whether it’s through reclaiming a family cottage or sharing stories with your kids, this episode is a call to embrace the sacred work of family. We also explore how the holiday season offers a perfect time to reconnect with family traditions. From meaningful Advent meditations to practical tools like the Family Board Meeting course, we’re excited to help you create a home that is intentional and full of life. ✨ A Few Takeaways: The power of family stories to shape our identity and inspire our future The importance of honoring both the joys and struggles in our family history How to talk with your kids about their roots in a meaningful way 🌟 Featured Resources: Beautiful Advent books with Jesse Tree meditations and ornaments The Family Board Meeting webinar on December 8th Exclusive Advent bundles to enrich your holiday traditions 🙏 Let’s pray together for the grace to live lives worthy of those who came before us, and to build homes filled with faith, hope, and love. 💖 If this episode speaks to you, consider supporting the mission of the Messy Family Project. Your generosity makes everything we do possible—from free resources to life-changing events. Together, we can strengthen families and inspire faith. #FamilyStories #HeritageAndHope #MessyFamilyProject #RootedInFaith /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/34119611

MFP 310: Marriage, Teamwork, and Business - an interview with Dan and Brenda Vansteenburg 11/18/2024

MFP 309: How Busy is Too Busy? 11/11/2024

MFP 308: The Power of Asking for Forgiveness 11/04/2024

MFP 308: The Power of Asking for Forgiveness “Genuine humility never disturbs the soul. Rather it is accompanied by peace, joy and calm” St. Theresa of Avila Summary What is the biggest problem in Catholic marriages? Although we appreciate good communication tools, marriage insights, and mentors - at the end of the day the biggest problem is simply a lack of holiness. One essential tool in our quest for holiness is learning how to ask for forgiveness. When we have conflict in our home, we all need to ask ourselves the question - what could I have done differently? When we take ownership in this way, we can repent to God and then ask forgiveness of our spouse or children in order to repair that relationship. Often we will focus only on our sins and try to amend our lives, but in addition to those good things, we also need to seek to reconcile the relationship and ask for forgiveness. Key Takeaways When there is conflict in the home, we always need to ask ourselves how have I contributed to this situation and what could I have done differently? Taking extreme ownership means that you don’t make excuses, but instead recognize that the past does not have power over you any more. You always have a choice. When you are aware of your weakness, you are more open to asking for forgiveness and growing in holiness Asking forgiveness also repairs the rupture in the relationship that happens as a result of our actions. When you ask forgiveness and make your heart pure through Confession, then you are able to more clearly see God. “The pure in heart shall see God” Matt 5:8 A daily examen should include asking for forgiveness of family members we have sinned against. Couple Discussion Questions Reflect on your marriage and children and ask God to show you areas in which you need to change. Go to your spouse and children and ask their forgiveness. When can we do a daily examen in our household? How can we incorporate regular asking of forgiveness? References: Romans 12 Matthew 18:21-35 /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/33756997

MFP 307: Navigating Family Life Challenges: Q&A with Real-Life Struggles and Faith-Filled Solutions 10/28/2024

MFP 306: What Teens/Tweens Really Need with Mark Hart 10/21/2024

MFP 306: What Teens/Tweens Really Need with Mark Hart “It’s important that we remember to talk ‘to’ our kids, not ‘at’ them” - Mark Hart Summary Parents are rightly concerned today about the influence of the culture on their teens. As much as we would like to put our kids in a teflon bubble to shield them from the false fake culture of the world, it is just not possible! What do our kids need from us to prepare them for life? Join us in this podcast for a conversation with Mark Hart of Lifeteen - a speaker, author, and parent himself of teens and adult children. Mark gives us some great insights (and laughs!) on how to talk to your kids, what they are REALLY looking for, and what not to be afraid of. We were blessed in this conversation and we are thrilled to be able to share it with you! Key Takeaways Keeping teens in a “teflon” bubble and trying to shield them from the world their whole lives doesn’t work. We need to teach them and get them ready. Kids need space to ask questions and have conversations with their parents without feeling judged. Pushing back is a natural part of maturation. Teens demand authenticity! They challenge us to be real and that is good for us and for the Church. Talk “to” your kids, not “at” them. Significant conversations with our teens allow our lives to re-echo across the generations. Take time for conversations. For parents, the 20 minutes you spend focused on your child and not on yourself is as spiritually beneficial as a Holy Hour! Parents should be less concerned with WHAT your child knows and more concerned about WHO is teaching them and where they are getting their information from God entrusted these souls to you for a season. They will not be living under your roof forever. See your child as a whole person. You need to spend time with them and really “see” them. A successful home has three altars: the dinner table to share life and food, the coffee table to gather with family and friends for ideas and fun, and the marriage bed that forms the foundation of the family. Parents often think of themselves as a hose that ideas and prayer comes through, but we need to be like a fountain - filled up so much in ourselves that we spill over onto our spouse, children, and everyone around us. Couple Discussion Questions Do we take time to have significant conversations with our kids? How can we do this more? Looking at the maturity of our children, are we protecting them too much? Not enough? How are we doing in using the “three altars” of our home? Are all three of them places that are giving life to our family? Links: Ascension press - Bible Heroes Register for the Family Board Meeting WWM On Demand course Listener Survey /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/33540277

MFP 305: Should You Correct Your Spouse? 10/14/2024

MFP 304: Enjoying your Toddler 10/07/2024

MFP 303: How to Parent Like a Catholic Pt. 2 09/30/2024

MFP 302: A Parent’s Guide to Temperaments 09/23/2024

MFP 302: A Parent’s Guide to Temperaments “You and your spouse are a team that GOD wants together!” - Art and LaraineBennett Summary The first step in creating a dynamic family is to know the people who are in it! That starts with knowing yourself, then your spouse, and then your children. One of the tools that we love using for this knowledge is the classic four temperaments - choleric, sanguine, melancholic, and phlegmatic. The leading Catholic authors on the temperaments are Art and Laraine Bennett, authors of the book The Temperament God Gave You and many other great resources! In this conversation we pepper them with questions about what the temperaments are, why knowing the temperaments are important, and how they can change your parenting. This podcast is FULL of great tips and resources of parents of any age. Listen in! Key Takeaways Temperaments are only ONE aspect of our personality. Many things make each one of us unique. Temperaments are part of the wisdom of the ancients, but they also have been extensively studied in modern psychology Your temperament is the way you REACT. Knowing our temperament helps us to learn how to RESPOND to others in love. As a parent, knowing our children’s temperaments helps because we can teach them how to mature by focusing on their strengths and helping them process their weaknesses. When we react we will fly, fight, or freeze. Learning the “art of the pause” will help us respond in love and get out of “reaction mode”. You and your spouse can help each other by knowing your gifts and giving each other alternatives to handling difficult situations. Couple Discussion Questions Take the quiz at https://temperamentquiz.com and link your account with your spouse. Observe your children this week. During a date night, talk about the temperament of each child and how you can encourage their strengths. What are our gifts as a couple? How can we better use them for the good of our children? /episode/index/show/messyparenting/id/33160577

Messy Family Podcast : Catholic Conversations on Marriage and Family

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