424 The 6 Saboteurs Destroying Your Self-Control (And How to Beat Them) with Eric Zimmer
Sobriety: The One Day At A Time Recovery Podcast
Release Date: 04/02/2026
Sobriety: The One Day At A Time Recovery Podcast
This is the second episode in the step work series with Sonia Kahlon. Co host of the sisters in sobriety podcast and a woman in long term recovery. And I’m tellin you, she is coming in HOT about Step 2! Before we dive in, a quick announcement. The show notes of every episode contain a summary, all the action steps and all the books mentioned in the episode. There is also a resources tab you’ll want to check out with a bunch of free guides like how to have sober fun, 30 tips for your first 30 days, as well as links to the YouTube channel. You can find all of these free resources to enrich...
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Today I sit down with Peter Bailey, author of Be Epic: Reframe Your Past to Navigate Your Future, president of the Prouty Project, and a man with 43 years of sobriety. Peter started drinking at 13, got sober at 22 on Block Island, Rhode Island, and has spent decades since helping people in recovery and corporate leadership see their stories through a completely different lens — one rooted in Joseph Campbell's Hero's Journey model. In this episode, you'll learn: How reframing your past can turn shame into your greatest superpower What the Hero's Journey model is and how it maps directly onto...
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What do you do when you’ve had a $28 million business exit — and then watch nearly all of it disappear? If you’re Diane Prince, you eventually find Al-Anon, do the work, and rebuild a life and business that’s more fulfilling than anything you had before. In this episode, Arlina sits down with Diane — entrepreneur, business strategist, and Al-Anon member of 17 years — for one of the most honest conversations about recovery, money, and entrepreneurship we’ve had on this show. The Exploding Doormat Diane didn’t grow up with alcohol in her home. But she grew up with rage — a...
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What if the biggest obstacle to your success isn’t your skill set, your circumstances, or even your past — but your addiction to staying stuck? That’s the central thread of my conversation with Peter Moulton, a 35-year recovery veteran, entrepreneur, and author of UP: A Journey of Intention, Focus, and Execution. Peter has spent nearly three decades coaching entrepreneurs and leaders, and what he’s discovered cuts right through the noise: most of us don’t fail because we lack information. We fail because we’re unwilling to be seen. The Three-Year Prison Peter describes a...
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You Don’t Have to Lose Everything First: What Step One Really Teaches Us If you’ve ever looked at the 12 steps and thought that’s not for me, you’re not alone. I thought the same thing for years. The God stuff felt like a barrier. The word “powerless” felt insulting. And the idea that my life had to look like a wreck before I qualified? That kept me stuck longer than anything else. This week on the podcast, I sat down with Sonia Kahlon — founder of EverBlume and host of the Sisters in Sobriety podcast — to start working the 12 steps together, live, on air. Sonia has nearly nine...
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What if the secret to lasting change isn’t a single powerful moment, but thousands of tiny, unremarkable ones? That’s the central idea behind Eric Zimmer’s powerful new book, How a Little Becomes a Lot: The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life. Eric is the host of The One You Feed podcast and a long-time figure in the recovery community with 26 years of sobriety. In Episode 424, he and I explored why real transformation happens slowly — and why that’s actually good news. The Hammer and the Chisel Eric opens his book with the story of Dasrath Manjhi, an...
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When Nothing Goes According to Plan — and That's the Point Andrew Lassise didn't get sober because he wanted to. He got sober because a judge gave him a choice: jail or rehab. He chose rehab. And as he'll tell you, that was the best decision he never really made. Andrew's story is the kind that makes you laugh out loud and then quietly reassess your own life. At 16, he was blacking out at parties. By college, it was a daily habit. By his mid-twenties, he had a 0.24 BAC DUI, three failed breathalyzer readings on his own car-mounted device, and a pocket breathalyzer he'd purchased on eBay to...
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What if your energy was like a bag of Skittles? That’s the metaphor Anne uses in this conversation, and once you hear it, you can’t unsee it. Every day you wake up with a limited number of Skittles. Each one represents your energy — mentally, emotionally, and physically. The problem? Most of us are throwing our Skittles away without even realizing it. We spend them worrying about things we can’t control, replaying conversations in our heads, arguing on social media, or saying yes to things we don’t actually want to do. Before we know it, our energy is gone. And we’re left feeling...
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The Beliefs That Shape Our Behavior One of the most frustrating experiences in life is knowing exactly what to do, but still not doing it. If you’ve ever tried to quit drinking, build a new habit, improve your health, or pursue a goal and found yourself slipping back into old patterns, you’re not alone. In this episode, I talk with behavioral design expert and bestselling author Nir Eyal about why this happens. The answer isn’t a lack of knowledge. It’s BELIEF. The Motivation Triangle Nir explains that motivation isn’t just about wanting something. It’s actually built on three...
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The Root Cause of Emotional Eating In Sobriety There’s something we don’t talk about enough. You quit drinking. You do the work. You go to meetings. You build a life you’re proud of. And then… You find yourself standing in the kitchen at 9pm. Again. Maybe it’s sugar. Maybe it’s “just a little snack.” Maybe it’s eating in secret. Maybe it’s feeling out of control around food in a way that feels eerily familiar. A lot of people in recovery don’t want to admit this part. But it’s common. Very common. In this week’s conversation with Ali Shapiro, we unpacked something...
info_outlineWhat if the secret to lasting change isn’t a single powerful moment, but thousands of tiny, unremarkable ones?
That’s the central idea behind Eric Zimmer’s powerful new book, How a Little Becomes a Lot: The Art of Small Changes for a More Meaningful Life. Eric is the host of The One You Feed podcast and a long-time figure in the recovery community with 26 years of sobriety. In Episode 424, he and I explored why real transformation happens slowly — and why that’s actually good news.
The Hammer and the Chisel
Eric opens his book with the story of Dasrath Manjhi, an Indian man who lost his wife because the road to the hospital was impossibly long. After her death, he took a hammer and chisel to the mountain separating his village from the town and spent decades chipping away at it — enduring ridicule and seemingly no progress — until he had carved a path that cut travel time by 90%. Eric calls this the ultimate story of how a little becomes a lot: not dynamite, just consistent effort.
Why Progress Is Invisible Before It’s Obvious
One of the most important points Eric makes is that progress happens long before we can see it. Our brains, wired for negativity bias, are constantly scanning for what’s not working — which makes it easy to miss all the marbles accumulating in the jar. He shared a story of a client who began putting a marble in a jar each sober day (without removing any for slips), and how seeing that jar fill up over months changed her entire relationship with her recovery.
The Recipe for Change
Eric’s formula is simple but not easy: low-resistance actions, done consistently, over time, in the same direction. Low-resistance doesn’t mean tiny — it means something you will actually do. Consistent means you don’t stop when it gets hard or invisible. And same direction means you aren’t scattered across 30 goals.
The 6 Saboteurs of Self-Control
Eric identifies six things that derail us at our “choice points”:
- The Autopilot Pitfall — acting without awareness (hello, phone scrolling)
- Fatigue Fallout — being too tired to make good choices
- The Shortsighted Stumble — valuing the present over the future (play the tape all the way through)
- Emotional Escapism — wanting to feel different than you do
- The Self-Doubt Stalemate — believing you can’t do it
- The Insignificance Trap — thinking one day doesn’t matter
Action Items from This Episode
- Do the values exercise on page 35: identify three times you were happiest, most proud, and most fulfilled — then look for the pattern.
- Pick a “guide” — someone you admire — and note what qualities you admire. Those are your values.
- Identify your current top saboteur and name one structural change to make it easier to choose well.
- Start a marble jar. Seriously.
Books & Resources Mentioned
- How a Little Becomes a Lot by Eric Zimmer – Buy Here
- The One You Feed podcast — oneyoufeed.net
Guest Website: https://oneyoufeed.net
Need help applying this information to your own life?
Here are 3 ways to get started:
Free Guide: 30 Tips for Your First 30 Days – With a printable PDF checklist
Grab your copy here: https://www.soberlifeschool.com
Private Coaching: Make Sobriety Stick
https://www.makesobrietystick.com
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