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FMQ 521 Come And Play For A Change

Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

Release Date: 12/05/2025

#480 The Missing Part Of Success show art #480 The Missing Part Of Success

Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

The Missing Part Of Success Why Thinking Isn’t Enough (And What Actually Works) The Bit Everyone Misses You’ve done the work. You’ve read the books. You’ve said the affirmations. You’ve visualised success over and over again. “I’ve got this.” “I’m a winner.” And yet… nothing really changes. Sound familiar? That’s because mindset alone isn’t enough. In this episode, we uncover the missing part of success — the part that turns thinking into doing, and knowing into being. It’s Not Just Mindset Yes, mindset matters. But it’s only half the story. Because if your...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

The Missing Part Of Success The Seed of Success Most People Miss We hear it all the time… “Think positive.” “Have the right mindset.” “Say your affirmations.” And yes… that’s part of it. But what if that’s only half the equation? In this Five Minute Quickie, we uncover the missing piece of success — the part hardly anyone talks about, yet it changes everything. > It’s Not Just Psychology… It’s Physiology You can have: The perfect plan The right words The strongest mindset …but if your body isn’t aligned? It won’t land. Success isn’t just in your...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

What Are You Afraid Of Losing? Here’s a question for you… What are you afraid of losing? Not gaining… not achieving… But losing. Because here’s the thing… I’ve been doing a bit of deeper work on myself lately — you know, when life shifts a little and things you’ve always done… just don’t have that same spark anymore. And in that space… that little void… I found myself looking for something new. A new direction… a bit more passion… a bit more something. But the harder I looked… The more it seemed to disappear. Now that’s frustrating, isn’t it? And it got me...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

FMQ530 What Are You Afraid of Losing? (And How It’s Holding You Back) Here’s a question for you… What are you afraid of losing? Not gaining… not achieving… But losing. Because here’s the thing… I’ve been doing a bit of deeper work on myself lately — you know, when life shifts a little and things you’ve always done… just don’t have that same spark anymore. And in that space… that little void… I found myself looking for something new. A new direction… a bit more passion… a bit more something. But the harder I looked… The more it seemed to disappear. Now...

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Your Growth Serves: Find Your Why, Build Confidence & Create Meaningful Impact What if personal development wasn’t just about fixing yourself… but fulfilling something bigger? In this deeper dive from the FMQ “The Big Why – Let’s Refresh”, we move beyond goals, habits and self-improvement — and into something far more powerful: Service through growth Because when your “why” is only about you, motivation fades. But when your growth begins to serve others, everything changes. In this episode, you’ll experience a powerful process to help you: Reconnect with your...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

FMQ529 – The Big Why: Let’s Refresh Sometimes we just need to pause… and refresh. Not another technique. Not another goal. Not another productivity hack. Just a simple question: Why are you doing this personal development thing anyway? In this short FMQ episode I invite you to take a moment to review where you are on your personal development adventure. Whether you’re brand new to this work or you’ve been exploring it for years, a refresh is powerful. Looking at how far you’ve come, what you’ve learned, and where you truly want to go next. Because personal development isn’t...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

Don't Blame Your Parents Or Anyone Else . Subscribe to the Podcast Ready to subscribe? to explore your options. Or, if you're on Apple Music or iTunes, you can go straight to subscribe or leave a review . Special Programs for You For tools on developing Supreme Inner Confidence, finding Freedom from Anxiety, or specialized Hypnosis Tracks, visit . Free Hypnosis Tracks Want access to my FREE hypnosis tracks? Head over to . Connect with Me Follow me on Twitter: Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

Who or What Is To Blame For Your Failure What are you blaming right now? The weather? The economy? Your lack of time? Your past? Your boss? Your parents? In this Five Minute Quickie (that’s never quite five minutes 😄), I’m planting a seed that might feel a little uncomfortable… Because blame feels justified. It feels intelligent. It feels protective. It even feels responsible sometimes. But what if it’s actually costing you your power? In this episode I begin to unpack: The hidden cost of living at the effect side of life Why excuses can feel like safety How trauma (big T or...

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Anxiety to Confidence - The Personal Development Unplugged Podcast

Empathy - A Way That Works Without The Pain In the FMQ527 I said something that probably made you blink. Empathy sucks. And I meant it. Not because caring is wrong. Not because helping people is wrong. Not because being sensitive is wrong. But because absorbing other people’s pain is not helping them — and it’s definitely not helping you. In this deeper dive, I show you: Why emotional dumping drains you Why empathy often becomes a hiding strategy The crucial difference between empathy and compassion How to stay grounded when people offload on you And how to become truly...

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Empathy Sucks (Unless It's With Yourself) I said it. Empathy sucks. Now before you unsubscribe and send me a strongly worded email… hear me out. In this episode I’m diving deep into something that most people believe is a virtue — feeling other people’s pain. And yes, empathy can be beautiful. But if all you do is absorb the emotions of others, carry their struggles, and ignore your own… that’s not kindness. That’s self-neglect. Here’s what I explore in this episode: Why absorbing other people’s pain drains your emotional energy How empathy can become a way of avoiding...

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More Episodes

Come And Play For A Change

In this slightly longer Five-Minute Quickie, I’m inviting you to do something different… to come and play. Play with ideas, play with possibilities, and play with the truth about those heavy beliefs we sometimes carry like “I’ve got no one.”

In this FMQ, we explore:

  • How “I’ve got no one” is a belief, not the truth

  • Why every belief — even identity-level stuff — can be changed

  • Why it often feels like our issues only happen to us

  • Why working with compassion (not empathy) creates real change

  • How every issue is just a behaviour — and behaviours can change

  • How these seeds we explore now lead directly into the deeper work in the following longer episode

This is your invitation to come play with me, to explore lightly but honestly, and to get ready for the deeper dive where we really shift these things.

Because it’s not magic… but it’s bloody magical.

Next steps:
Make sure you’re subscribed, share this with someone who needs a little support today, and keep an eye out for the longer episode — it’s a good one.

https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/fmq-521-come-and-play-for-a-change/

 

 

Shine Brightly 🌟

Paul


Hey there! I’d love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you've enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at feedback@personaldevelopmentunplugged.com.


Subscribe to the Podcast

Ready to subscribe? Click here to explore your options. Or, if you're on Apple Music or iTunes, you can go straight to subscribe or leave a review here.


Special Programs for You

For tools on developing Supreme Inner Confidence, finding Freedom from Anxiety, or specialized Hypnosis Tracks, visit PaulCloughOnline.com.


Free Hypnosis Tracks

Want access to my FREE hypnosis tracks? Head over to paulcloughonline.com/podcast.


Connect with Me

Follow me on Twitter: @pcloughie

Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you're operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you're unsure.


Find Us on Other Platforms

Catch the podcast on Spotify, Castbox, iHeart Radio, YouTube, or on our Libsyn page.

Stay tuned, and keep shining brightly. ✨


Music Credits

Music by Wataboi from Pixabay, Music by DreamHeaven from Pixabay, Music by ccjmusic from Pixabay, Music by freegroove from Pixabay, Music by prazkhanal from Pixabay.

And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism

Hey, welcome. Welcome to the Personal Development Unplugged podcast with me, Paul, where we are going to dive deeper into serious subjects, but in a way that's hopefully serious, but fun, funnily serious, because changing can be fun.

 

And that's why I've said come and play for a change. And this is just like the seed I'm sowing that I want to drop inside you. And then we can nurture it, water it, feed it, and let it grow into the special person that you are.

 

And one of the subjects I want to talk about, or will be talking about, is the thought, and it may be just me, may be just me, but there's a thought that we have, which is a belief, isn't it? Thinking you've got no one. Thinking you've got no one. What a belief to have.

 

What a belief to have. How's that? How's that working for you? Because, you know, you're right. You are right.

 

You've got no one. What? Why are you saying that? I thought this was, I know what you're thinking now. I thought you were going to try to make things better, Paul.

 

Help me change. But the thing is, if it's a belief, and a belief of, you know, with an identity bit, there's a little bit of I in there. I've got no one.

 

And there'll be a belief below that, giving you the reason why you've got no one, which you're going to believe. Well, if you believe that, then you're right. Because that's what you believe.

 

But beliefs can be changed. Every belief can be changed. Every core belief can be changed, if it's right to do so, because some of them do no longer, what? Do no longer? Yeah, no longer serve us.

 

They were okay in the beginning, but they're no longer any good. So we're going to get rid of them, because that's what we do here. You see, every issue that we have is only happening to you.

 

Or every issue that's happening to me is only happening to me. You see, everyone else is fucking fine, aren't they? You see them wandering around, they're fine. That's a lot of bollocks, isn't it? I'm sorry, I'm swearing, because I do swear.

 

No, it's not offensive. It's just me being a little bit, well, passionate. It's my passionate way of speaking, which is a lot of bollocks.

 

Oh, it isn't. It isn't. But the thing is, we do feel that it's only us, isn't it? Only us.

 

You've got no one, because it's only affecting me. I know I feel that when I've gone through either dark stages in my life, or even mild stages. You know, something happens, you go, oh, only me.

 

And I'm going to talk deeper about that in the longer podcast, why it's only happening to you, or it feels that way. And this is the beginning, as I said, the season. I'm going to keep saying these seeds, the seeds of our dives, I call them dives, but exploring issues that can be so destructive.

 

They're destructive to ourselves and the people around us. And I know we don't want that. We don't want that.

 

If you were to really go inside and explore, I know you don't want that for anybody else. And I know if you were really honest, you don't want it for yourself. And the thing about this is, I asked myself the question, okay, Cloughie, so are you an expert in all of this, all of these bloody issues? And my honest answer was, fuck no, of course I'm not.

 

I haven't experienced all the issues firsthand. I've experienced some, and I've got out of them and I'm going to teach you how to do how I did it. And also, but the thing is, I have a belief.

 

You see, I have helped others let go of so many issues that I haven't experienced. You see, that's not empathy, you see, because I don't need to know how you feel. Nice.

 

We've talked about it before. It's all about compassion. I want to know how you do what you do, how you want to be, and how I can help you make that change.

 

That's where I come from. And I've done it so many times because I believe everything that we do is just a behaviour. Now, that's common bloody sense, isn't it? I'm doing something, it's a behaviour.

 

But we don't think of our issues as behaviours. I even think as a belief as a behaviour. And some of them can be really supportive, and some of them can be just shit.

 

But they're shit for a reason. And that's what we're going to dive deeply into and then find different ways of doing this behaviour. Honouring our unconscious mind.

 

Yeah, I'll do lots of processes, maybe a little bit of hypnosis. So come with me and play for a change. Because everything is a behaviour.

 

Every compulsion is a behaviour. Every addiction to me, my belief is a behaviour. And every behaviour can change.

 

We can change our behaviours easy. Sometimes it takes a little bit of effort. But the principles are simple.

 

Because in simplicity, guess what? There's genius. And you make things complicated, they just get bloody complicated. And I can't do complicated.

 

I want to do simple, effective ways to help you change. So that's where we're going. Look for the next longer podcast because it's a real good one.

 

It's going to be a good one. I'm recording it. Yeah, I know it's going to be a good one.

 

Because that's why I jumped in here to look at the way I'm dressed. Because I just just wanted to get on and explain to you where I'm going. And I want you to come with me.

 

Now, I know you may be saying, I'm fine. I'm fine. We all say that, by the way, we all say we're fine, even when we're not.

 

So, but the thing is, sometimes we are fine. And then sometimes we're not. And so by listening to this, and joining me in the processes, they'll help you in the future, you'll know to come back.

 

But even on little issues, we're going to talk about serious stuff that has, well, a serious in the way that they affect our lives seriously. As we said, the consequences of carrying on like this, we hurt other people hurt ourselves. We don't want that.

 

But the process can be used for all manner of different things. So it could be a small issue that you're anxious about, have a little touch of fear, we can still use the same process, because the process is just the process of changing a behavior. And you say, I don't worry how big the behavior is, as it were, how big this issue is, because we can bring it down to these basics in its simplest form, and then make the simplest change, which then blows out the water and creates a life that we all deserve.

 

I hope this makes sense. I hope you will come and play with me for a change. You'll come and sit down for a change.

 

It's not magic, but it's fucking magical. That's a change. I'm sorry, I'm swearing far too much.

 

Am I? If it offends you, let me know. Feedback at personaldevelopmentunplugged.com. If there's something that you you're suffering, and it's an issue that you want to change, let me know because I'd rather deal with that sooner rather than later. I don't want to just come up with it haphazardly.

 

I want to deal with the things that you want to have dealt with. So let me know. Same email address.

 

They're all the same. They all come to me because there's no other bugger here. It's only me.

 

So please do that and come and experience change, because then you begin to enjoy every heartbeat. And guess what? Your unconscious mind will start to surprise you to feel happy for no reason. And that is a wonderful concept.

 

To feel happy for no bloody reason when you're wandering around in your day. So come and play and share with everybody you can, because we all need a little bit of help some days. And that's days with a D-A-Z-E.

 

Days. Enjoy. Enjoy every heartbeat.

 

Subscribe by the way. Press subscribe because you'll get these. Don't want to miss one.

 

Don't want to miss one. And have more fun than you can stand. As I said, so go fly.

 

And I'll see you in the longer podcast and every other one. Bye bye now. Warning, you are now leaving the unplugged mind of Paul Clough.

 

It's time to fly now. Be brave my friend. Personal Development Unplugged

 Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited

Personal development [Unplugged] [podcast][NLP][Hypnosis][self development]self improvement][awareness]