Sari Swears Podcast | Season 8, Ep. 9: How to Master Difficult Conversations: The Tool I Swear By
Release Date: 11/07/2025
Sari Swears
This year will look EXACTLY like last year unless something deeper changes. MOST people donāt fail because they lack discipline or ambition. They fail because theyāre chasing results instead of identity. You donāt want the verdict. You want the feeling you think comes with it. And hereās the part no one wants to admit: Willpower is trash. It runs out. Every time. In this weekās podcast, I break down: ā” Why goals alone donāt work ā” Why ādoing moreā keeps you stuck ā” Why everything shifts when you decide who you are first If you want different results this year, donāt...
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If youāre a trial lawyer, youāve probably been told some version of this: š« āDonāt be arrogant.ā š« āStay humble.ā š« āLet the work speak for itself.ā Sounds right⦠until it starts shrinking how you show up. In this weekās podcast, Coach K and I talk directly to YOU about a mindset trap we see all the time ā the humble saboteur š§ . Itās the voice that tells you: š£ļø āDonāt own that win too much.ā š£ļø āYouāre not there yet.ā š£ļø āIf you think youāre great, youāll get lazy.ā That voice is NOT humility. Itās fear. And juries...
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The year is winding down. Trials are slowing. Your brain is STILL going a mile a minute. This week on Sari Swears, Iām joined by guest speaker Coach K for a conversation that feels like hitting the reset button before the new year. We talk through the mindset traps that quietly wear trial lawyers down and what to do about them. We Break Down: šš½ Why chasing ā100% preparedā keeps you stuck šš½ How fear bloats your opening and blurs your story šš½ Why isolation lies to you about everyone else having it together šš½ How your saboteur plays its favorite holiday reruns...
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Have you ever felt COMPLETELY drained by this work⦠even when everything is technically āgoing fineā? Not just tired, but heavy? Thatās exactly what weāre talking about this week on Sari Swears and Coach K is back with me for this episode. Weāre diving into secondary trauma ā the kind you absorb from: šš½ The cases šš½ The injuries šš½ The families šš½ The devastation It doesnāt just affect your health⦠it can quietly limit your damages in the courtroom. If youāve been feeling exhausted, disconnected, overwhelmed, or like youāre always just...
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Letās talk about money. Specifically: what money can buy... and what it canāt. That distinction? Itās everything in trial. And itās everything when it comes to damages. Economic damages? Youāve got bills, life care plans, receipts⦠Non-economic? You're asking the jury to put a number on grief. On lost joy. On the inability to hold your child again. In this podcast episode, Iāll show you EXACTLY how to: ā Separate price from value in voir dire, opening, and closing ā Use stand-in language and metaphor to anchor your ask ā Reframe the juryās role so they stop...
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If youāre anything like I was a few years ago⦠You're doing everything. You're hustling. Youāre building. And youāre running a successful business. BUT, you STILL feel trapped. Thatās because youāre operating like a solopreneur, not an entrepreneur. (Spoiler: one burns out, the other builds a team.) In this weekās podcast, Iām sharing something outside of the trial world, but essential to your success inside the courtroom: šš½ HOW to get the right people in the right seats šš½ WHY the traditional org chart is completely ass-backwards šš½ WHAT Iāve learned from...
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Do you ever catch yourself repeating things in trial and worry itās too much? Let me stop you right there: itās NOT too much. In fact, you probably need to repeat yourself MORE. This weekās podcast episode is all about how intentional repetition helps your jurors: āļø Understand your case āļø Remember your core messages āļø Trust YOU Too many attorneys are afraid of sounding redundant. But repetition, when done right, is one of the most powerful teaching tools you have. In the episode, I break down: š£ļøWhy repetition builds neural pathways and increases recall š£ļøHow to...
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You ever meet someone and think, āOh, theyāre about to break wide open.ā That was PI attorney Shaun Lieser. When he first joined our H2H world, he was smart (still is), capable (still is), and honestly? A little stuck. Then he FLIPPED the switch. Inside the episode, we talk about: šš½ Why wanting to be liked is killing your presence in court šš½ The moment Shaun realized voir dire isnāt all about being smart ā itās about connection šš½ How the H2H Method⢠helped him step FULLY into his voice and style Thereās SO much gold in this one, and Shaun brings the...
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Ever been in a conversation that went sideways fast? š«£ You had good intentions⦠but suddenly it felt like you were speaking different languages? Yeah. Been there. Thatās WHY Iām dropping this weekās episode: How to Master Difficult Conversations: The Tool I Swear By. Itās based on a life-changing framework I got from my very first coach and I still use it TO. THIS. DAY (yeah it's that good). Learn how to STAY grounded, clear, and powerful when sh*t hits the fan. Inside this episode, Iām sharing: ⨠What most people get wrong when trying to ātend to the relationshipā āØ...
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If instinct is your only strategy in the courtroom, you've already lost ground. This weekās episode might ruffle a few feathers. Because Iām calling BS on the myth of ānatural trial talent.ā You know the one. š The idea that great trial lawyers are just BORN that way. That some people just have it. Instincts are a starting point. BUT theyāll only take you so far. If youāre not practicing, really practicing, youāre playing small. In this episode, I talk about: šš½ Why you confuse instinct with what it really is: trained responsiveness šš½ How trial...
info_outlineEver been in a conversation that went sideways fast? š«£
You had good intentions⦠but suddenly it felt like you were speaking different languages?
Yeah. Been there.
Thatās WHY Iām dropping this weekās episode: How to Master Difficult Conversations: The Tool I Swear By.
Itās based on a life-changing framework I got from my very first coach and I still use it TO. THIS. DAY (yeah it's that good).
Learn how to STAY grounded, clear, and powerful when sh*t hits the fan.
Inside this episode, Iām sharing:
⨠What most people get wrong when trying to ātend to the relationshipā
⨠Why not knowing your outcome can derail the entire conversation
⨠The surprising reason you might be avoiding hard convos (itās not what you think)
And thatās JUST the beginning.
I walk you through the full 4-step Focus Tool thatāll help you prepare and show up with presence ā whether itās your co-counsel, your kid, or your partner.
(Or save it for when youāre about to text āwe need to talkā¦ā)
Tune in NOW! š§
Love,
Sari š
Focus Tool Sheet - sariswears.com/focus-tool
Quote:
"Just because you're having a hard conversation doesn't mean it has to be a hard experience. When you're grounded in clarity, when you know what you're asking for, what your emotions are trying to tell you, and how you're contributing to the dynamicāyou can show up with compassion and confidence."
ā Sari de la Motte
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