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PULP #12 - THE SWITCH-WITCH SCRIPT PINCH | [FANTASY/DETECTIVE]

Release Date: 09/26/2020

2026 SHOWREEL / SAMPLER

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

this is THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY; publishing handmade schmuck surrealism & stories that'll leave ink in your ears since 2019 x 💀 💀 💀 💀 💀 💀 for more surreal stories: 💀 for podcasts: 💀 for books and digital zines: 💀 for videos: 💀 and for patreon:

BONE ZONE HALF HOUR #4: CRADLED IN THE BIG HANDS OF OUR VENGEFUL GOD

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

An orphaned, terrestrial planet rests cradled in the cupped hands of a dying God, neighbourless in an empty cosmos. Slouched in the vast, abandoned heavens, a slack skull stares down upon one-eighth of this humble globe; His tangible gaze emitting visible light in two tangential fields of almighty yellow. In tandem, they pierce through an atmospheric barrier of mirror blue, blooming phenomenal malachite skies. Only in the fastened sights of Godking Pantakratos can the Folk Beneath thrive, for the remaining eighty-seven percent of the habitable world has undergone monumental cryoformation....

BONE ZONE HALF HOUR #3: WELCOME TO THE FRANK UTURE & MORE

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

Private Detective Frank Uture stepped out from behind his privacy screen with a bloody mouth and tremors in his steps like they’d installed all his bones upside down and the wrong way around. The corpse; my corpse, not my corpse but the one that I put there, lay on the brown-washed pavement not breathing — a sure sign that I’d done what needed to be done. As a junior detective, I didn’t have much to do at the time. I hadn’t worked a scene like this before. I didn’t think I’d get assigned to it, but I had to show up for there to be any chance of my getting sleep without a lead...

THE BONE ZONE HALLOWE'EN HALF HOUR!

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

I'M YOU, FROM THE FUTURE a boy wakes on christmas day to find an intruder in his smart-home that looks just like him, and if you can't tell just from the title what's going to happen, then there's no hope, is there? WOULD YOU STILL LOVE ME IF I WERE (A) WORM? how many times will my wife ask me this question? many, many times because this tall tale cannot be considered an answer. angular tommy, third-generation bumpkin, turns into an earthworm whenever he looks at the moon day-or-night, and that's no good considering his whole job is keepin' birds outta corn fields. ALL THE SWIFTNESS OF...

BONE ZONE HALF HOUR #1: IF YOU DIE ON STAGE, YOU DIE IN REAL LIFE

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

It was the sudden realisation that everybody else was living their goddam American dreams that snapped him out of his vibe-walk. Dirk Steveman coasted all the way through his shift in the jetpack mines, gotten back home to his Le Grand McMansion, opened his mail, washed his nutsack in the sink, brushed his teeth, ate his dinner, washed his nutsack again, and gotten all nice and tucked up in bed and all it had taken to break him out of his trance was the realisation that, no matter how many bedrooms he had tacked onto the side of his 200,000 square-foot domain, no matter how many bars of gold...

CLOWN DEPARTMENT: A WALTER WELLES MYSTERY

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

PAPER GHOST DETECTIVE GUILD; YOU'VE REACHED THE CLOWN DEPARTMENT, HOW MAY I DIRECT YOUR CALL? on a well-deserved break from sunny-side up los angeles, celebrity sleuth walter welles iis tasked with uncovering the truth behind a locked-room mystery in the scottish highlands. but where has the victim gone? All sound design made with public domain SFX & music, unless stated below: (yanvince - who am I? [NCS Release] Music provided by NoCopyrightSounds) have a good night x 💀 for more surreal stories: 💀 for podcasts: 💀 for books and digital...

SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES? - EPISODE 3

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

after two-hundred and forty-seven years of imprisonment on a desolate island, the saint-borne vampires have enacted a scheme of dastardly revenge. it is up to aoife sheridan, surreal detective supreme, and the intrinsic council of witches to decide their punishment. SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES is a three-part audiozine that i cannot believe i have finished. i mean, goddam. i feel like i've been making this show for like thirty years. i am excited to make something new. i hope you like it. if you like this, or want a little more context to the world of STRANGELOVE and the...

SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES? - EPISODE 2

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

after two-hundred and forty-seven years of imprisonment on a desolate island, the saint-borne vampires have enacted a scheme of dastardly revenge. it is up to aoife sheridan, surreal detective supreme, and the intrinsic council of witches to decide their punishment. SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES is a three-part audiozine that has been in the works since the last series of PULP: SURREAL STORIES FROM A NEARBY SKULL. it was supposed to be the final episode but it turned out to be too long, oops. Usually, the things I make turn out to be too long but THIS was somethin' else! anyway, it's...

SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES? - EPISODE 1

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

after two-hundred and forty-seven years of imprisonment on a desolate island, the saint-borne vampires have enacted a scheme of dastardly revenge. it is up to aoife sheridan, surreal detective supreme, and the intrinsic council of witches to decide their punishment. SHOULD WE JUST KILL ALL THE VAMPIRES is a three-part audiozine that i have been working on for a little while now. in the time it has taken, i have been unemployed and reemployed. i aim to finish the next two episodes as soon as i can but my rent has to come first, unfortunately. if you like this, or want a little more context to...

YET ANOTHER BONE ZONE HALLOWEEN HALF HOUR!!!

THE SLEEPY BONES DETECTIVE AGENCY

ANOTHER YEAR, ANOTHER BONE ZONE HALLOWEEN HALF HOUR UPLOADED SEVERAL HOURS AFTER THE HOLIDAY HAS ENDED. THERE'S A LINE IN THERE THAT SAYS ITS ON TIME BECAUSE I WAS VERY CONFIDENT AT THE TIME, AND THEN I DIDN'T FINISH IT. THAT'S ALL THERE IS TO IT, SOZ. please enjoy the following half-hour (actual length about an hour and a bit) of stories including; "WHY, WHY MS. MUMMIFIED ALIVE?", "FEAST YOUR BLOODY EYES ON THIS!", "STAIRWELL THAT ENDS WELL", and "MAKING MOUNTAINS OUT OF ANTHILLS". stay safe x 💀 for more surreal stories: 💀 for podcasts: 💀 for books and digital...

More Episodes

Aoife Sheridan's looking for a book; it's an old book, about yea high? A cat burglar nicked it from a witchy high school, haven't you heard? Might end the world? No? All right, then.

'PULP' is a series of short stories set in the same universe; telling tall tales of gods and horrors, detectives and witches, monsters and all-sorts.

This is the series finale of 'PULP: SURREAL STORIES FROM A NEARBY SKULL'. Later on, when we return, we'll be bringing you something different. Until then, this is part two of two in the 'Switch Witch Saga'.

thank you for listening x

💀 for more surreal stories: www.carefultheresbones.com
💀 for podcasts: www.open.spotify.com/show/71BsUtInYZalsP0dPWNFuz?si=c272b6610cba4175
💀 for books and digital zines: www.sbda.itch.io
💀 for videos: www.youtube.com/@sbda
💀 and for patreon: www.patreon.com/sbda

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