Rae Alexandra and “Unsung Heroines,” Part 1 (S8E14)

Rae Alexandra has 35 stories to share with you, plus her own.

In this Women’s History Month episode, meet and get to know Rae. She recently published a book with City Lights Publishing called Unsung Heroines: 35 Women Who Changed the Bay Area. It’s of course available at City Lights, but you can also find it at your local independent bookstore.

I read the book and could not put it down. Only toward the end of the 35 essays did I start to recognize the women Rae features. I love history and I love learning and I have mixed feelings about the fact that there are so many rad women whose stories are untold. Thank you, Rae Alexandra, for shining on a light on these incredible women.

These days, she’s a staff writer at KQED. But Rae’s story starts in Wales in the UK. She grew up in Cardiff, the capital of the country. (I learn in the conversation that Wales is a country. I also learn that “United Kingdom” and “Great Britain” are the same thing. Now, British vs. English we don’t touch, for obvious reasons. But I digress …)

Ed. note: I’ll describe my conversation with Rae as two Gen Ex journalist types with ADHD (is that redundant?) doing their best to be linear. To me, the meanderings of our talk are totally normal.

Rae says that Wales is delightful and has all the best castles, but that’s because of the number times the country has been invaded and conquered. Close to where her mom lives today is a castle that boasts the world’s largest crossbow. When I ask when Rae was born (1978), we discover that she’s a horse as in Year of the Horse (aka 2026). Cool.

Rae continued to call Cardiff home up through her college years. She didn’t go to another school outside of Wales that had accepted her because she was attached to a group of skateboarders in her hometown. After she graduated, though, she moved to London.

Music has been central for Rae as far back as she remembers (same). She shares stories of being maybe 5 and listening to the Top 40 with her cassette recorder ready to nab her favorite songs (same).

According to Rae, the English look down on the Welsh, and have for some time, based on classist generalizations. Wales is where the UK mines most of its coal. London-types consider their neighbors to the southwest feral, and in some regards, the Welsh are, she says.

In the Eighties, she remembers stories about IRA bombings appearing on the news nightly. Also, in Wales, miners went on strike and everyone knew about it. Rae says that Wales in the Eighties was essentially like listening to The Clash.

We go on a sidebar about siblings, birth order, and what it means to be the youngest, which Rae and I both are. Growing up, she was close with both her older sisters. Today, one lives in Australia and the other lives in the London suburbs.

Around age 10, Rae discovered metal. By 12, she decided that she would become a music journalist. In her teen years, she “snuck” her writing into local and college newspapers. The music journalism she consumed in those days included publications like Smash Hits, Kerrang!, NME, and Melody Maker. In fact, her first job out of college was at Kerrang!

We go on a sidebar on the whole idea of living somewhere vs. visiting, and how they’re so totally different on every level. I use Chicago, where I lived for a full six months in the Nineties, as my example. Rae offers up a stay in Brooklyn as hers.

That job at Kerrang! is what brought Rae to London, another place she found impossible to live. I ask her to expound on what it was about the place, and she indulges me. She says that you have to be obscenely wealthy to live in Central London, so most folks are forced to the outskirts. But the jobs are in the middle of town, and so you end up spending around two or three hours a day commuting underground.

It was/is also gray—the weather, the architecture—and the people in London were, as Rae describes it, hostile. When she goes into detail about the ways in which they were hostile, we agree that only you get to shit on your own hometown. People who aren’t from there aren’t allowed. It’s a rule. Look it up.

After a year working for the magazine in London, Rae met a guy from San Francisco. She’d been to The City and even spent significant time here working for Maximum Rock ‘n’ Roll. (At this point in the recording, I mistakenly call the BBQ place near Hayes and Divisadero until sometime in the early 2000s “Brothers.” It was in fact called Brother in-law’s. My apologies.)

She moved in with that guy she met, lived with him for six months in London, and then it was time for him to come home to SF. He asked her if she wanted to join him and she accepted. She had already transitioned to freelance writing for the magazine, because office life didn’t suit her, so work wasn’t so much a problem. But upon arrival, she soon discovered how difficult it was to do anything without a Social Security number.

That added an extra layer to moving here. But it wasn’t the place itself or its people that made things hard. It was the system, so to speak. Also, while she was getting settled and learning how to survive in the US without an SSN, she started to see that the guy was, let’s just say, not for her. She felt he’d been playing the long game when they lived together in London, but once back on his home turf, some of his sociopath tendencies emerged.

It was 2002 and she lived in Bernal Heights on Cortland. She spent most of her time in the Mission, just down the hill. After a short time, the guy convinced her that they needed to get married, so they moved back to London. The marriage lasted three months, and Rae returned to her new home—San Francisco.

When she came back, she experienced a stretch of housing instability. You could call it “couch surfing,” but either way, it was dicey. Six months or so later, things settled. It was easier to live cheaply in the early 2000s, also. A $5 burrito could be a whole day’s worth of food. And Rae had befriended enough bartenders that she rarely paid full-price for booze. She describes “The Blackout Triangle” of Killowatt, Delirium, and Dr. Bombay’s. She also regularly visited Beauty Bar until that place went downhill.

Check back this Thursday for Part 2 with Rae Alexandra.

We recorded this episode at Vesuvio in North Beach in February 2026.

Photography by Jeff Hunt