The Cuban Missile Crisis of Burlesque w/ Tito Bonito
Release Date: 03/18/2026
Purity Culture and Fascism Are Very Good Friends w/ Erica Smith
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Erica Smith is an award-winning sexuality educator, advocate, and author from rural Pennsylvania, where she grew up casually Christian, went to public school, learned sex ed from a gym teacher, and somehow became the most responsible teenage sexual health nerd with birth control, condoms, spermicide, and library books before having sex for the first time. In this episode we talk about purity culture, religious sexual shame, high-control groups, Christian nationalism, marital consent, “duty sex,” the pressure placed on both women and men in evangelical purity teachings, and why healing from...
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A Condom For A Cheeto w/ Alex Gay
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: Alex Gay is a certified intimacy and relationship coach and adult performer from Maryland, where his sex education came from homeschooling, evangelical purity culture, and two conversations with his dad that left him wondering if condoms were worth trading for Cheetos. In this episode we talk about growing up in a religious high-control group, shame as a clue to desire, what kink actually means, why so many men are expected to magically know how to be good in bed, and how Alex went from purity culture to...
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Purity Culture Sets Us Up for Failure w/ Reuben Johnson
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Reuben Johnson is one half of FlyDuo, a husband-and-wife team behind the pleasure-forward platform SexTech n' Chill, originally from the suburbs of Boston where growing up in a strict religious environment meant sex education was mostly abstinence, shame and silence. In this episode we talk about purity culture, abstinence-only sex education and how religious messaging around sex can leave people completely unprepared for real intimacy. We get into the science behind pleasure, why nervous system regulation matters in the bedroom, the myth of “think about baseball” when people struggle with...
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I Need You To Say Blue Balls w/ Ginger Koehler
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: Ginger Koehler is a sex educator, columnist and speaker from the Midwest where her earliest “sex talk” happened over mac and cheese at a McAlister’s… and ended with her bursting into tears when her mom explained what a period was. In this episode we talk about what it actually means to study sex academically, why people confidently give terrible sex advice online, and the moment Ginger realized she wanted to build a career translating complex sex science into language normal humans can understand....
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Wait… Is This A Kinky Dinner Party? w/ Maurice James
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: Maurice James is a comedian, host, actor, and co-creator of Kinky Comedy from Jackson, Mississippi where his formal sex education came from an Episcopalian school science class taught by a teacher who carried a petrified bull testicle cane… and where sex ed mostly felt like mitosis and meiosis rather than anything connected to his own body. Want to her Maurice and I unfiltered reading Reddit stories? Join the afterparty over on Patreon! Where to find Maurice: Instagram: & Kinky Comedy: ...
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A Real Good Sex Guy w / Justin Herman
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Justin Herman is a television director and producer, internationally touring stand-up comedian, and co-creator of Kinky Comedy originally from Albany, New York where his formal sex education consisted of one awkward school lesson separating boys and girls, a confusing anatomical chart, and a diner conversation with his dad about “the birds and the bees” that definitely did NOT cover kink. In this episode we talk about the lifestyle community, kink and non-monogamy, how Kinky Comedy accidentally became a hub for sexually liberated audiences, the anthropology of play parties, why lifestyle...
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What Porn Taught Hollywood About Sex Scenes w/ Lotus Lain
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Lotus Lain is an adult performer, producer, intimacy coordinator and sex worker advocate originally from California’s Central Valley where growing up in a small town meant most of her real sex education came later through curiosity, the internet, and eventually working in the adult industry itself. In this episode we talk about the unexpected overlap between porn and Hollywood, how the adult industry approached consent, boundaries and choreography long before mainstream film and television caught up, and why productions eventually realized they needed intimacy coordinators. We also get into...
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Where There's A Will, There's A Fcking Way w/ Aimee Latta
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Aimee Latta is a certified embodied intimacy and relationship coach and the host of the podcast Come Talk With Aimee, originally from Utah where the best sex education she got was a fifth grade presentation from a very enthusiastic husband and wife team… followed by years of abstinence-only education and a very graphic childbirth video meant to scare everyone into never having sex. In this episode we talk about growing up in Utah, abstinence-only sex education, Mormon purity culture, and what happens when the only messaging around sex is prevention instead of pleasure. We also get into...
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The Cuban Missile Crisis of Burlesque w/ Tito Bonito
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Tito Bonito is an international burlesque performer, host and instructor originally from Miami, Florida where he knew he was gay before he even knew how babies were made… and learned most of the rest through TLC, the Spice Girls, and sheer curiosity. Catch Tito and I talkin’ some real shit reading Reddit stories and join the afterparty over on Patreon! Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 4p PT / 7p ET: _________________________________________________ Where to find Tito: Instagram: | Links: Where to find Arielle: Insta: // TikTok: Bonus...
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Everyone Wants To Be A Cult Leader w/ Jimanekia Ebon
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join the watch party LIVE AT FIVE on YouTube: Jimanekia Eborn is a trauma specialist, sexuality educator, survivor advocate, co-owner of Cintima, and founder of the nonprofit Tending the Garden, originally from Riverside, California where she actually DID received sex education multiple times growing up… but was any of it good? Absolutely not. In this episode we talk about grief, trauma work, modern dating struggles, sex education failures, intimacy coordination, professional wrestling (yes, I mean that), mental health, and why community and safe spaces are essential for connection and...
info_outlineTito Bonito is an international burlesque performer, host and instructor originally from Miami, Florida where he knew he was gay before he even knew how babies were made… and learned most of the rest through TLC, the Spice Girls, and sheer curiosity.
Catch Tito and I talkin’ some real shit reading Reddit stories and join the afterparty over on Patreon! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck
Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 4p PT / 7p ET: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck
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Where to find Tito:
Instagram: @cubanmissilecrisis | Links: https://www.titobonito.com/links
Where to find Arielle:
Insta: @ariellezadok // @birdsandbeesdontfck
TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck
Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon:
- STORY 1: My (31F) husband (33M) of four years doesn’t take our role playing seriously when we have sex. He purposely takes his characters way over the top.
- STORY 2: AITA for dropping our dinner on the ground and walking out when my boyfriend asked me "What's for dinner tonight, b*tch?"
Like my cuffs? Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle
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Episode Cheat Sheet:
03:07 Shadowbanning, algorithms and why sex educators need Patreon
07:00 Demisexuality, graysexuality and why dating apps don’t work for everyone
09:14 Friends who fuck, play communities and chosen family
10:41 Why hookup culture looks different for women, femmes and men
12:45 The dream of a hookup app for women and femmes
18:31 Why talking about sex openly matters
20:00 Therapy, curiosity and emotional intelligence in relationships
23:07 Why getting “dicked down” can improve your mood
24:22 Prostate pleasure, anal play and why butt toys need a stopper
27:05 Lube 101: silicone vs water based and toy safety
29:31 Gooning, masturbation and slowing down sexual experiences
31:40 Subspace, rope play and erotic trance states
36:18 Growing up gay in Miami and early memories of sexuality
40:52 Masculinity, machismo and emotionally healthy men
46:22 Why it’s harder for men to seek emotional or sexual support
49:36 The performance of masculinity and learning sensuality
53:55 Why monogamy puts pressure on one partner to meet every sexual need
57:35 Men in burlesque and how Tito found the stage
59:27 The early burlesque scene and performing masculine tropes
01:03:44 Why burlesque is political, comedic and deeply sex positive
01:06:03 Giving audiences permission to explore sexuality
01:08:20 Consent culture and why burlesque spaces teach boundaries