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You Can’t Masturbate Your Way to a Million Dollars w / Caitlin V

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Release Date: 06/17/2026

Arielle Z on Ariel Z: Consent, Comedy & Chaos w/Ariel Zucker show art Arielle Z on Ariel Z: Consent, Comedy & Chaos w/Ariel Zucker

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday:  Ariel Zucker is a producer, director, and writer from Atlanta, Georgia where sex education was taught through abstinence, fear-based messaging, and wildly unhelpful visuals that left her and her peers confused about their bodies and sexuality. In this episode we talk about growing up with abstinence-based sex education, the confusion and shame that comes from fear-driven messaging, how sex education shapes our early experiences, and what it actually means to unlearn all of that as an adult. We get into working in...

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Dangerous Women w/ Alyssa Mei Liu show art Dangerous Women w/ Alyssa Mei Liu

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Alyssa Mei Lue is a traveling burlesque and circus performer, Playboy model, and podcaster from Riverside, California, where her formal sex education consisted of one vague classroom video, a heavily religious upbringing, and getting married at 21 before she had ever seen, touched, or had sex with a penis. In this episode, we talk about performance, survival, and what it actually means to be a dangerous woman. Alyssa shares how she got into modeling during quarantine, why modeling can be just as risky as live performance, and how learning boundaries in those industries changed the way she...

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We should be kissing each other, not fighting each other w/ Emily Zawadzki show art We should be kissing each other, not fighting each other w/ Emily Zawadzki

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Emily Zawadzki (AKA Emily Zed) is a Canadian sex educator who specializes in supporting queer, kinky, and neurodivergent people navigating intimacy, relationships, and pleasure. She grew up in Kitchener-Waterloo, Ontario, where her formal sex education came from Catholic school abstinence lessons, graphic STI scare tactics, and a very cool mom who handed her an educational flap book about how babies are made. In this episode we talk about building a career in sex education, why gender-affirming care isn’t just for...

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I Thought Penises Had Bones w/ Joy Mamey show art I Thought Penises Had Bones w/ Joy Mamey

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Joy Mamey is an actor, writer, comedian, cancer survivor, and improviser currently performing with Sunday Company at The Groundlings who grew up in Los Angeles where her sex ed teacher wouldn’t answer her questions so she thought sex was basically naked kissing and that penises had bones. In this episode we talk about the surprising overlap between improv and intimacy, why "yes and" can become a people-pleasing trap, and what happens when we're taught to ignore our instincts to make other people comfortable. Joy...

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You Can’t Masturbate Your Way to a Million Dollars w / Caitlin V show art You Can’t Masturbate Your Way to a Million Dollars w / Caitlin V

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Caitlin V is a sex and relationship coach, former sexuality researcher, author of Harder, Better, Longer, Stronger, and host of Good Sex on HBO Max from Michigan where her earliest sex education included a fifth-grade period lesson, a graphic STI scare slide in health class, and years of curiosity about pleasure that she had already discovered on her own. In this episode we talk about what men actually want help with in their sex lives, why performance goals like “lasting longer” rarely solve the real problem, and...

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Episode 69: Making Her Moan w/ Daddy Heff show art Episode 69: Making Her Moan w/ Daddy Heff

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

It’s 6/9 so we’re publishing early! Plus if you're in Los Angeles, come with us... to Melrose Umbrella Co from 6-9p to celebrate! Daddy Heff is a professional dominant, kink educator and master of the sensual art of impact play from Greensboro, North Carolina where his earliest sex education included school lessons on fallopian tubes, ovaries, sperm and semen, sneaking reads of his mom’s risqué novels, flipping through Penthouse Forum stories, and asking a very uncomfortable teacher to explain anal sex after seeing it in a porn video. In this episode we talk about the connection between...

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Stay Attractive. Stay Attracted. w/ Phil Morris show art Stay Attractive. Stay Attracted. w/ Phil Morris

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join us for the watch party on YouTube LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on episode release day:  Phil Morris is an actor best known as Jackie Chiles on Seinfeld and John Jones on Smallville who grew up in Los Angeles and Beverly Hills, where the closest thing to sex education was basic health class, a little anatomy, and figuring out the rest through growing up in Hollywood. In this episode we talk about Good Vibes Breakfast Club, the beautiful way community can create space for men to be vulnerable, and why real connection so often happens when people drop the performance and just show up as...

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Everyone Wants To Say Yes Mistress w/ Justine Cross show art Everyone Wants To Say Yes Mistress w/ Justine Cross

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Justine Cross is a professional dominatrix, dungeon owner, educator, and sex worker advocate who grew up in the tri-state area where she actually received surprisingly comprehensive sex education growing up between private and public schools, something she credits with shaping how she thinks about sex, consent, and power dynamics today. In this episode we talk about how someone becomes a professional dominatrix, what actually happens inside a BDSM dungeon, and why kink spaces are often far more structured, communicative, and consent-focused than most people expect. We also get into power...

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Is This Blood Normal? w/ Nicole Jardim show art Is This Blood Normal? w/ Nicole Jardim

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: Nicole Jardim is a certified women’s health coach, author of Fix Your Period, and founder of the Institute for Menstrual Health originally from Antigua where the closest thing to sex education was mostly silence… leaving her to figure out hormones, cycles, and menstrual health the hard way before eventually dedicating her career to helping other women do the same. In this episode we talk about Nicole and I’s shared history working in television production, how burnout and health challenges led her to...

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Purity Culture and Fascism Are Very Good Friends w/ Erica Smith show art Purity Culture and Fascism Are Very Good Friends w/ Erica Smith

Birds And Bees Don't Fck

Erica Smith is an award-winning sexuality educator, advocate, and author from rural Pennsylvania, where she grew up casually Christian, went to public school, learned sex ed from a gym teacher, and somehow became the most responsible teenage sexual health nerd with birth control, condoms, spermicide, and library books before having sex for the first time. In this episode we talk about purity culture, religious sexual shame, high-control groups, Christian nationalism, marital consent, “duty sex,” the pressure placed on both women and men in evangelical purity teachings, and why healing from...

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More Episodes

Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck

Caitlin V is a sex and relationship coach, former sexuality researcher, author of Harder, Better, Longer, Stronger, and host of Good Sex on HBO Max from Michigan where her earliest sex education included a fifth-grade period lesson, a graphic STI scare slide in health class, and years of curiosity about pleasure that she had already discovered on her own.

In this episode we talk about what men actually want help with in their sex lives, why performance goals like “lasting longer” rarely solve the real problem, and how intimacy, not frequency, is what most couples are actually craving. Caitlin shares how she went from academic sex research at the Kinsey Institute to coaching men about sex and relationships, why maintenance sex can quietly kill desire, and how intention, presence, and curiosity can transform a sex life. We also get into astrology and sexual chemistry, loud sex and the connection between breath and orgasm, group dynamics in intimacy, why coaching spaces for men matter, and the surprising way Caitlin realized academia wasn’t where she wanted to make her impact.

Caitlin and I are not fcking around with these Reddit stories. Join Patreon and dive in! https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck 

Where to find Caitlin:

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@CaitlinV

Book (Harder, Better, Longer, Stronger): https://harderbook.com

Where to find Arielle:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/birdsandbeesdontfck

TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck 

Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck

 

Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon;

STORY 1: I think my wife 31-F might be poisoning me 34-M, and I don’t know what to do

STORY 2: I [28F] am dating a divorcing dad [34M] and it’s starting to take over my life

STORY 3: My bf (M29) is threatening to break up with me (F24) over condoms

 

Like my cuffs? Me too! Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here:https://lovecrave.com/arielle

 

Episode Cheat Sheet

02:14 Astrology, Sexual Chemistry & Scorpio/Leo Energy

06:03 Loud Sex, Breath & Orgasm Connection

08:15 Getting Caught Having Sex & Early Exploration

11:07 Claiming, Dominance & Sexual Identity

13:28 Science, Magic & Manifestation in Sex

16:12 Why Caitlin Coaches Men About Sex

19:02 Why Most Therapists Aren’t Trained in Sexuality

21:36 Quality vs Quantity in Long-Term Sex

23:45 Why “Maintenance Sex” Kills Desire

26:04 Physical, Emotional & Spiritual Sex Explained

28:20 Co-Regulation, Group Energy & Intimacy

32:21 Why Male Friendship & Community Matter

36:54 Boundaries, Accountability & Relationship Conflict

45:33 Communication, Softening & Honest Feedback

46:58 Growing Up in Michigan & Early Sex Education

49:24 Masturbation, Pleasure & STI Fear-Based Education

52:05 Becoming a Sex Researcher at Kinsey Institute

56:12 Leaving Academia & Starting a Sex Education Platform

01:00:37 Coaching vs Influencing in Sex Education

01:02:50 Changing Career Paths & Following Your Zone of Genius

01:04:43 Patreon Reddit Stories Preview