Arielle Z on Ariel Z: Consent, Comedy & Chaos w/Ariel Zucker
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Ariel Zucker is a producer, director, and writer from Atlanta, Georgia where sex education was taught through abstinence, fear-based messaging, and wildly unhelpful visuals that left her and her peers confused about their bodies and sexuality. In this episode we talk about growing up with abstinence-based sex education, the confusion and shame that comes from fear-driven messaging, how sex education shapes our early experiences, and what it actually means to unlearn all of that as an adult. We get into working in...
info_outline
Dangerous Women w/ Alyssa Mei Liu
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Alyssa Mei Lue is a traveling burlesque and circus performer, Playboy model, and podcaster from Riverside, California, where her formal sex education consisted of one vague classroom video, a heavily religious upbringing, and getting married at 21 before she had ever seen, touched, or had sex with a penis. In this episode, we talk about performance, survival, and what it actually means to be a dangerous woman. Alyssa shares how she got into modeling during quarantine, why modeling can be just as risky as live performance, and how learning boundaries in those industries changed the way she...
info_outline
We should be kissing each other, not fighting each other w/ Emily Zawadzki
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Emily Zawadzki (AKA Emily Zed) is a Canadian sex educator who specializes in supporting queer, kinky, and neurodivergent people navigating intimacy, relationships, and pleasure. She grew up in Kitchener-Waterloo, Ontario, where her formal sex education came from Catholic school abstinence lessons, graphic STI scare tactics, and a very cool mom who handed her an educational flap book about how babies are made. In this episode we talk about building a career in sex education, why gender-affirming care isn’t just for...
info_outline
I Thought Penises Had Bones w/ Joy Mamey
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Joy Mamey is an actor, writer, comedian, cancer survivor, and improviser currently performing with Sunday Company at The Groundlings who grew up in Los Angeles where her sex ed teacher wouldn’t answer her questions so she thought sex was basically naked kissing and that penises had bones. In this episode we talk about the surprising overlap between improv and intimacy, why "yes and" can become a people-pleasing trap, and what happens when we're taught to ignore our instincts to make other people comfortable. Joy...
info_outline
You Can’t Masturbate Your Way to a Million Dollars w / Caitlin V
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join us LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on YouTube for the watch party every Wednesday: Caitlin V is a sex and relationship coach, former sexuality researcher, author of Harder, Better, Longer, Stronger, and host of Good Sex on HBO Max from Michigan where her earliest sex education included a fifth-grade period lesson, a graphic STI scare slide in health class, and years of curiosity about pleasure that she had already discovered on her own. In this episode we talk about what men actually want help with in their sex lives, why performance goals like “lasting longer” rarely solve the real problem, and...
info_outline
Episode 69: Making Her Moan w/ Daddy Heff
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
It’s 6/9 so we’re publishing early! Plus if you're in Los Angeles, come with us... to Melrose Umbrella Co from 6-9p to celebrate! Daddy Heff is a professional dominant, kink educator and master of the sensual art of impact play from Greensboro, North Carolina where his earliest sex education included school lessons on fallopian tubes, ovaries, sperm and semen, sneaking reads of his mom’s risqué novels, flipping through Penthouse Forum stories, and asking a very uncomfortable teacher to explain anal sex after seeing it in a porn video. In this episode we talk about the connection between...
info_outline
Stay Attractive. Stay Attracted. w/ Phil Morris
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join us for the watch party on YouTube LIVE AT FIVE (PT) on episode release day: Phil Morris is an actor best known as Jackie Chiles on Seinfeld and John Jones on Smallville who grew up in Los Angeles and Beverly Hills, where the closest thing to sex education was basic health class, a little anatomy, and figuring out the rest through growing up in Hollywood. In this episode we talk about Good Vibes Breakfast Club, the beautiful way community can create space for men to be vulnerable, and why real connection so often happens when people drop the performance and just show up as...
info_outline
Everyone Wants To Say Yes Mistress w/ Justine Cross
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Justine Cross is a professional dominatrix, dungeon owner, educator, and sex worker advocate who grew up in the tri-state area where she actually received surprisingly comprehensive sex education growing up between private and public schools, something she credits with shaping how she thinks about sex, consent, and power dynamics today. In this episode we talk about how someone becomes a professional dominatrix, what actually happens inside a BDSM dungeon, and why kink spaces are often far more structured, communicative, and consent-focused than most people expect. We also get into power...
info_outline
Is This Blood Normal? w/ Nicole Jardim
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Join the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET: Nicole Jardim is a certified women’s health coach, author of Fix Your Period, and founder of the Institute for Menstrual Health originally from Antigua where the closest thing to sex education was mostly silence… leaving her to figure out hormones, cycles, and menstrual health the hard way before eventually dedicating her career to helping other women do the same. In this episode we talk about Nicole and I’s shared history working in television production, how burnout and health challenges led her to...
info_outline
Purity Culture and Fascism Are Very Good Friends w/ Erica Smith
Birds And Bees Don't Fck
Erica Smith is an award-winning sexuality educator, advocate, and author from rural Pennsylvania, where she grew up casually Christian, went to public school, learned sex ed from a gym teacher, and somehow became the most responsible teenage sexual health nerd with birth control, condoms, spermicide, and library books before having sex for the first time. In this episode we talk about purity culture, religious sexual shame, high-control groups, Christian nationalism, marital consent, “duty sex,” the pressure placed on both women and men in evangelical purity teachings, and why healing from...
info_outlineJoin the live watch party on YouTube today, episode release day, at 5p PT / 8p ET:
https://www.youtube.com/@birdsandbeesdontfck
Alex Gay is a certified intimacy and relationship coach and adult performer from Maryland, where his sex education came from homeschooling, evangelical purity culture, and two conversations with his dad that left him wondering if condoms were worth trading for Cheetos.
In this episode we talk about growing up in a religious high-control group, shame as a clue to desire, what kink actually means, why so many men are expected to magically know how to be good in bed, and how Alex went from purity culture to helping queer people, couples, and curious adults feel more confident exploring sex, intimacy, kink, and their own bodies.
Want to hear Alex and I unfiltered reading Reddit stories? Join the afterparty over on Patreon!
https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck
Where to find Alex:
Instagram: @heyalexgay
TikTok: @heyalexgay
Website: https://heyalexgay.com/
Where to find Arielle:
Instagram: @birdsandbeesdontfck
TikTok: @birdsandbeesdontfck
Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/cw/birdsandbeesdontfck
Bonus stories found exclusively on Patreon
- STORY 1: Am I the Asshole for Breaking Up With My Girlfriend After She Wanted Our Relationship to Be Pussy Free?
- STORY 2: My Husband Needs to Touch My Breasts to Fall Asleep. I’m Exhausted and Need a Divorce. Am I the Asshole?
- STORY 3: Am I the Asshole for Breaking Up With My Girlfriend Because She Literally Told Me She Would Cheat on Me If I Took a New Job?
Like my cuffs AND my vibrator necklace? Me too. Get $15 Off Crave Pleasure Jewelry Here: https://lovecrave.com/arielle
Episode Cheat Sheet
00:00 Meet Alex Gay, certified intimacy coach and adult performer
02:23 Adult entertainment, OnlyFans, and why spicy content builds coaching trust 04:48 Coaching sexual confidence, kink, communication, and why sex education is lifelong
05:30 The pressure on cis straight men to magically know how to be good in bed 07:01 Why "normal" does not exist when it comes to sex, bodies, and kink
08:10 Shame as a clue to desire and how taboo shapes what turns us on
10:20 Growing up in Maryland inside an evangelical high-control group
11:44 Homeschool sex ed, Christian sex books, condoms, and the Cheeto trade
16:17 Sleepovers, curiosity, and why honest sex education changes everything
19:30 Boy moms vs. moms who have boys and the emotional weight placed on sons 22:00 Leaving religion, hitting rock bottom, and finding inherent self-worth
25:16 Men's mental health, masculinity, and why 60 men die by suicide every hour 29:28 Queer sex education, coaching, and what gay male coaches bring to the table 31:46 Play parties, group scenes, body confidence, ethical porn, and real naked bodies
38:25 Alex's first OnlyFans videos, strip interviews, and modeling non-sexual intimacy 44:00 Course creation, ADHD, and why the labor of pleasure cannot be on your partner
49:21 Coaching couples, high-mileage questions, and becoming your own sex detective
56:32 Dr. Tush aftercare products, butt play recovery, and kink aftercare
01:00:00 Bonus Reddit stories and where to find Alex Gay