244 Managing Expectations: Showing Up For Yourself During Hard Times
Release Date: 05/21/2024
Unapologetically Sensitive
No Room for In-Between: Literal Thinking and Communication Ruptures In this raw and honest episode, Patricia (she/her) shares her ongoing challenges with neurodivergent miscommunication, community rupture, and the emotional toll of being misunderstood. From neighborhood conflicts to horse training lessons, from cancel culture to navigating friendships and travel as an autistic person, Patricia opens up about the messy, contradictory realities of life, belonging, and growth. Listeners will walk away feeling less alone in their struggles with relationships, self-advocacy, and embracing both...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
The Push-Pull of ADHD and Autism: Stretching Without Breaking In this candid conversation, Patricia Young (she/her) and B Lourenco (she/her) dive deep into the realities of living with ADHD, autism, and other forms of neurodivergence. They explore the push-pull between self-accommodation and stretching ourselves, how shame and internalized ableism impact daily life, and what it means to create realistic support systems at home, in relationships, and in the workplace. Expect raw honesty, relatable stories, and practical insights for navigating neurodivergent life. WHAT YOU’LL HEAR IN THIS...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Rupture without Repair, and the Discomfort of Being Misunderstood In this deeply personal episode, Patricia (she/her) unpacks the fallout from a neighborhood rupture and the painful loss of community connection. Through the lens of being autistic and AuDHD, she explores rejection sensitivity, communication breakdowns, friendship trauma, and why repair isn’t always possible. She also shares how co-regulation, body doubling, Costco runs, and fierce family love provide grounding. This conversation is raw, tender, and validating for anyone who has struggled with being misunderstood...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
When ADHD Wants Adventure and Autism Just Wants a Nap Patricia (she/her) explores what it means to show up authentically as a neurodivergent person—especially when navigating the tension between wanting novelty (hello ADHD/AuDHD brains!) and craving sameness (thank you autism). She shares candid stories about celebrating her anniversary, managing low energy, social interactions, and dealing with conflict. Patricia also opens up about balancing autistic traits, ADHD novelty-seeking, PDA (persistent drive for autonomy), and honoring her sensitivity. If you’re autistic, ADHD, AuDHD, or...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
When the Dogs Stop Saying Hi: The Human Need for Connection and Belonging Patricia (she/her) explores the complexities of community, being perceived, and the challenges of navigating relationships amidst misunderstandings and cancel culture. She shares personal experiences of rupture and repair within her community, reflecting on the emotional impact of feeling excluded and the importance of acknowledging one's behavior in relationships. Patricia also highlights the simultaneous beauty of connections and celebrations, even amidst challenges, emphasizing the need for self-acceptance and...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Disempowered to Empowered: Meltdowns, Boundaries & Donuts In this heartfelt episode, Patricia (she/her) shares three powerful personal stories that highlight the challenges—and wins—that come with being a sensitive, creative, neurodivergent human. From navigating family dynamics around living arrangements, to reclaiming power after a disempowering volunteer experience, and even exploring the emotional depth behind a simple craving for an apple fritter, Patricia offers an intimate and validating glimpse into what it's like to be an AuDHDer who feels things deeply—and still...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Friendship, Boundaries, and Other Olympic Sports for Autistic Brains Patricia gets real about friendship challenges, navigating communication mismatches, and how OCD and autistic wiring can shape our relationship expectations. She shares a behind-the-scenes peek into her new podcast project, the insecurities that surfaced while collaborating with her co-host, and how unexpected moments of validation reminded her that what she brings to the table is more than enough. HIGHLIGHTS · Patricia plans to release the podcast bi-monthly to...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Breaking Down Internalized Ableism Summary In this conversation, Patricia explores the concept of internalized ableism, particularly among neurodivergent individuals. She discusses how societal stigma and expectations can lead to negative self-perceptions and feelings of inadequacy. Patricia shares personal experiences and insights on how internalized ableism manifests in various aspects of life, including relationships, self-acceptance, and the pressure to conform to neurotypical standards. She emphasizes the importance of unlearning these hurtful beliefs and embracing one's...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Some Challenges in Neurodivergent Communication Summary In this episode, Patricia discusses the challenges faced by AuDHDers and other neurodivergent individuals in communication, particularly regarding lack of responding to messages. She explores the concept of internalized ableism and how it affects self-perception and interactions. Patricia shares personal experiences and insights on the importance of flexibility in relationships and the need for authenticity in communication. The conversation emphasizes the struggles of neurodivergent individuals, including executive functioning...
info_outlineUnapologetically Sensitive
Coping and Prepatory Strategies for Overstimulating Situations Summary In this episode, Patricia discusses her experiences with content creation, coping strategies for overstimulation, and managing sensory sensitivities during significant life events like weddings. She shares insights on emotional preparation, adjusting to changes in family dynamics, and maintaining a healthy work-life balance to prevent burnout. Throughout the conversation, she emphasizes the importance of self-care, embracing imperfection, and recognizing the rights of individuals to rest and be themselves....
info_outlineManaging Expectations: Showing Up for Yourself During Hard Times
Jen and Patricia discuss attachment wounds in their friendship. They explore the importance of self-awareness, setting boundaries, and managing expectations. They highlight the need for compassion & understanding when dealing with attachment issues & emphasize the ongoing work of healing & growth. In this conversation, Patricia shares her recent experiences with conflict & how she navigated this. She discusses the importance of leaning into difficult emotions and listening to others without defensiveness.
CO-HOST
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC
HIGHLIGHTS
Summary
The conversation revolves around attachment injuries and the impact they have on relationships. Patricia explores the concept of self-care and the need to treat oneself with kindness and nurturing. The conversation highlights the different lenses through which people view relationships and the importance of understanding one's own biases. Overall, the conversation emphasizes the value of curiosity, compassion, and self-empowerment in navigating challenging situations.
In Depth Takeaways
· Attachment injuries can impact relationships and trigger emotional reactions.
· Self-awareness is crucial in recognizing and understanding attachment wounds.
· Setting boundaries and managing expectations can help navigate attachment issues.
· Compassion and understanding are essential in healing and growth.
· Working on oneself and developing a strong inner relationship is key to managing attachment wounds. Leaning into difficult emotions and situations can lead to personal growth and understanding.
· Listening without defensiveness allows for better communication and resolution in conflicts.
· Self-care involves treating oneself with kindness and nurturing one's own needs.
· Understanding one's own biases and lenses can improve relationships and communication.
· Curiosity, compassion, and self-empowerment are essential in navigating challenging situations.
Additional Takeaways
- Understanding emotional struggles: Gain insights into navigating complex emotions.
- Communication strategies: Learn effective ways to express feelings and thoughts.
- Attachment wounds exploration: Understand how past experiences impact relationships.
- Self-reflection tools: Discover techniques for introspection and personal growth.
- Compassion importance: Explore the role of empathy in fostering connections.
- Relationship navigation: Tips for managing challenges in interpersonal dynamics.
- Trauma healing techniques: Tools for addressing and healing past traumas.
- Empathy and connection building: Foster deeper connections with others.
- Self-care prioritization: Learn to prioritize self-care and well-being.
- Embracing imperfections: Understand the value of self-acceptance and growth.
- Emotional intelligence enhancement: Develop skills for understanding and managing emotions.
- Healthy boundaries cultivation: Establish boundaries for healthier relationships.
- Validation of experiences: Feel validated in your personal journey and struggles.
- Self-discovery encouragement: Find inspiration for exploring your true self.
- Personal growth support: Receive guidance for personal development and transformation.
- Conflict resolution strategies: Learn techniques for resolving conflicts peacefully.
- Resilience and strength building: Develop resilience to overcome challenges.
- Effective listening techniques: Enhance your listening skills for better communication.
- Vulnerability encouragement: Embrace vulnerability as a path to authenticity.
- Positive change inspiration: Get motivated to make positive changes in your life.
Sound Bites
"The theme is attachment injuries."
"We all need a secure attachment."
"I really have learned to lean into whatever is going on for the moment and knowing that it will last for as long as it lasts."
"I was really able to listen instead of going into a place of defensiveness."
"This is the first time that I honestly thought I don't want to do relationships anymore because the feelings were so intense."
Chapters (please adjust for the addition of the introduction)
00:00 Introduction and Checking In
01:26 Attachment Injuries and Emotional Challenges
09:03 The Importance of Secure Attachment
11:18 Managing Expectations and Setting Boundaries
16:38 Learning to Show Up for Ourselves
18:30 Leaning into Difficult Emotions and Situations
19:40 Listening without Defensiveness in Conflict
24:35 The Importance of Self-Care and Nurturing
26:28 Understanding Biases and Lenses in Relationships
29:17 Curiosity, Compassion, and Self-Empowerment in Challenging Situations
PODCAST HOST
Patricia was a Licensed Clinical Social Worker for over 17 years, but she is now exclusively providing coaching. She knows what it’s like to feel like an outcast, misfit, and truthteller. Learning about the trait of being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP), then learning she is AuDHD with a PDA profile and RSD, helped Patricia rewrite her history with a deeper understanding, appreciation, and a sense of self-compassion. She created the podcast Unapologetically Sensitive to help other neurodivergent folks know that they aren’t alone, and that having a brain that is wired differently comes with amazing gifts, and some challenges. Patricia works online globally working individually with people, and she teaches Online Courses for neurodivergent folks that focus on understanding what it means to be a sensitive neurodivergent. Topics covered include: self-care, self-compassion, boundaries, perfectionism, mindfulness, communication, and creating a lifestyle that honors you
CO-HOST BIO
Jen Perry, MSEd, MA, LPC has been a psychotherapist for 20 years. She specializes in helping Highly Sensitive People thrive in love, work, and parenting Highly Sensitive Children. Jen is passionate about using mindfulness and compassion-based approaches to ameliorate human suffering.
LINKS
Jen’s Links
Email: Jen@heartfulnessconsulting.com
Jen’s website: https://heartfulnessconsulting.com/
Patricia’s Links
Neurodivergent Online Course-- https://unapologeticallysensitive.com/neurodivergent-online-courses/
Receive the top 10 most downloaded episodes of the podcast-- https://www.subscribepage.com/e6z6e6
Sign up for the Newsletter-- https://www.subscribepage.com/y0l7d4
To write a review in itunes:
- click on this link https://itunes.apple.com/us/podcast/unapologetically-sensitive/id1440433481?mt=2
- select “listen on Apple Podcasts”
- chose “open in itunes”
- choose “ratings and reviews”
- click to rate the number of starts
- click “write a review”
Website--www.unapologeticallysensitive.com
Facebook-- https://www.facebook.com/Unapologetically-Sensitive-2296688923985657/
Closed/Private Facebook group Unapologetically Sensitive-- https://www.facebook.com/groups/2099705880047619/
Instagram-- https://www.instagram.com/unapologeticallysensitive/
Youtube-- https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCOE6fodj7RBdO3Iw0NrAllg/videos?view_as=subscriber
Tik Tok--https://www.tiktok.com/@unapologeticallysensitiv
e-mail-- unapologeticallysensitive@gmail.com
Show hashtag--#unapologeticallysensitive
Music-- Gravel Dance by Andy Robinson www.andyrobinson.com
000002BE 000002BE 00003D9C 00003D9C 000FF082 000FF082 00007E86 00007E86 000FEC87 000FEC87