Ep 200: Truth or Trigger: Celebrating 200 Episodes of UFYR by Answering YOUR Relationship Questions!
Release Date: 05/26/2025
Episode: 225 How to RAISE YOUR STANDARDS and UPGRADE YOUR LIFE
Unf*ck Your Relationships
WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 224: Life Lessons from a Recovering People Pleaser
Unf*ck Your Relationships
Okay, babe… let’s talk about people pleasing, because this episode is me calling myself (and you) all the way out. For years, I thought being the “chill, supportive, easygoing” partner made me good. But in reality? I was just betraying myself over and over. I wasn’t setting boundaries, I was building walls and then wondering why everything exploded when I finally snapped. I share the story of how I went from spending every damn Saturday house-hunting for someone else’s dream home (that I wasn’t even living in!) to realising I was overextending myself because I was scared to look...
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Episode 223: Stop Calling It Love…You’re Just Abandoning Yourself
Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, I’m calling BS on the fluffy, feel-good version of “self-love.” Because let’s be real… bubble baths and affirmations don’t fix years of self-abandonment. I get raw about my own story of being the “ultimate caretaker”, the one holding everything together, doing the emotional labor, and calling it love. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t love, it was survival. And it left me exhausted, resentful, and disconnected as hell. I break down what it really looks like to stop people-pleasing and start standing the f*ck up for yourself…even when it...
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Episode 222: How to Stop the Emotional Whiplash of Fearful Avoidance
Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I dive into the fearful avoidant attachment style sometimes called anxious avoidant and the blind spots that come with it. This was once my dominant attachment style, and even now I can see how it still pops up in relationships. Unlike anxious or dismissive avoidants, the fearful avoidant flips between hyper-activation (all emotion, seeking closeness, reassurance, and validation) and deactivation (withdrawal, coldness, the “ick,” detachment). This creates emotional whiplash for partners, leaving them unsure which version of you they’re going...
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Episode 221: Why Logic Won’t Save You in Love
Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I’m breaking down the blind spots of the dismissive avoidant attachment style. If you’ve ever felt confused about why you (or your partner) shut down, withdraw, or over-rely on logic in relationships, this episode will give you clarity and a new way forward. Here’s what I dive into: Logic vs. Love – Why relying on logic and analysis won’t create real intimacy. Where It Starts – How childhood environments that dismissed emotions shaped these defense patterns. The Hidden Cycle – How conflicts get rationalized away, leading to the same...
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Episode 220: The Hidden Patterns Keeping You Stuck in Love
Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I dig into the blind spots of anxious attachment, the hidden patterns that keep you stuck in the same cycles, even when you think you’ve “done the work.” I explain why reflection alone isn’t enough, because you can only reflect on what you’re consciously aware of. Blind spots live in the shadows the parts of yourself you deny, repress, or don’t even know exist. And until you shine light on those, you’ll keep repeating the same patterns in love, friendships, and even business. Here’s what I explore in this episode: Your strength as...
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Episode 219: The Real Reason Anxious + Avoidant Relationships NEVER Work (Until You Do This)
Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I dive into one of the most common yet challenging dynamics I see: the anxious–avoidant relationship. Instead of just giving surface-level advice like “communicate better” or “give each other more space,” I explore how shadow work is the real key to creating lasting change. I share some of my own experiences with anxiety, avoidance, and love and why I realised that traditional approaches often just reinforce the old wounds. For me, shadow work has been the tool that allowed me to see the parts of myself I had disowned and projected onto...
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Ep 218: Mirror, Mirror: A Conversation About Call-Outs with Connected Woman Alum Heather Rotan
Unf*ck Your Relationships
Today’s conversation is all about the OWN IT part of CLOCK IT, OWN IT, CLEAN IT UP…and who better to share than the accountability queen herself, my amazing client Heather! Heather is a mother of three, a healthcare executive, and a self-proclaimed attention whore who loves deeply, leads fiercely, and never backs down from a challenge…and she proved that when she finally (after THREE FUCKING YEARS!) signed up for The Connected Woman! Facing down your patterns is never easy. But Heather makes it look that way with the way she owns them. It can take fucking AGES for people to clean up...
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Ep 217: Self-Abandonment in Relationships: How to Stop Betraying Yourself
Unf*ck Your Relationships
Not to break your entire self-image or whatever, but abandoning all your needs and desires for the sake of your partner actually doesn’t make you a good person. Sorry not sorry. Sure, maybe it feels good to oh-so-f*cking-selflessly lay your needs down to fulfill your partner’s instead. To be the “good girl.” The “cool girl.” To play the hero in his story. Right up until resentment starts burning so badly you think you’ve got a f*cking ulcer. Truthfully, self-abandonment is a relationship-killer. But it can be a subtle one, especially when you don’t know what the fuck...
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Ep 216: 10 Brutal Truths About Anxious Attachment (This Will Piss You Off)
Unf*ck Your Relationships
Warning: today’s episode might just piss you off. It’s to be expected, all right? I am called the Trigger Queen, after all. (If you’re new here, just know: it’s all said with love.) Buckle up, because today, I've got some fucking brutal truth bombs to drop about anxious attachment. If you’re someone who anxiously attaches, at least a couple of these are probably going to make you fucking furious. But you know what? Fucking good. Sometimes we need a good shakeup to get our heads out of our asses and actually start shifting things. The reality is, the patterns that you're running...
info_outlineI can’t believe I’m about to say this (well, I actually can) but…
WELCOME TO THE 200TH EPISODE OF UNF*CK YOUR RELATIONSHIPS!
Fuuuck, has this been a JOURNEY. Most podcasts don’t even break double digits, let alone triple, let alone hit fucking 200. Can I just take a second to brag on myself? Way to go, Michelle. I’m so proud of you.
And I’m proud of YOU, my loves; every single one of you that has shown up wanting to do the work. Wanting to learn. Wanting to reconnect to yourself and to others. I see you. I’m so fucking proud of you for being here.
You’ve given me the gift of my dream come true…so I want to give something back today. I reached out and asked for your relationship situations you could use a little coaching on, and you all DELIVERED.
Today, we’re playing a little game called TRUTH OR TRIGGER. Let’s see if those stories you’re telling yourself about your relationships are ACTUALLY the truth…or a story your triggers are trying to disguise as the truth.
WORK WITH MICHELLE:
These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: https://michellepanning.com/awakening
Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience
CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning
Website: http://www.michellepanning.com