Unf*ck Your Relationships
Welcome to Unf*ck Your Relationships Podcast! I’m your host Michelle Panning - intimacy alchemist AKA your love, sex, and relationship bestie, trigger queen, and founder of my signature program The Connected Woman. I get it, you’re done being left on read, getting ghosted and being caught up in a cycle of attracting emotionally unavailable men. Let’s be real - you have NEEDS. You deserve it all, you deserve to feel worthy and confident. You deserve a fulfilling love life. For years I was going through the same experiences with men over and over again that left me feeling confused, anxious, and pissed off. I silenced myself in dating and relationships because I was terrified of being judged, rejected, and abandoned. I just wanted a meaningful relationship and thought I was doing all the right things. But none of it was working. I knew I couldn’t continue to repeat the same cycle with different men. Something had to change. I decided in that moment that I was going to finally work on healing my own wounds and work on myself, so that I could experience a beautiful and fulfilling relationship. I decided to put myself first. And now, with this podcast, I want to share with you the exact internal work strategies that I did to get to a place of confidence, peace, and worthiness. You can kiss ALL of your worries and limiting beliefs around love goodbye. Are you ready? Grab your favorite glass of wine and let’s get to work, because it is time to reclaim your self worth babe. For more information about the podcast, or other ways you can work with me, visit: www.michellepanning.com I would love to connect with you more on social media! You can find me at: IG: @michellepanning Website: michellepanning.com
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Episode: 225 How to RAISE YOUR STANDARDS and UPGRADE YOUR LIFE
11/17/2025
Episode: 225 How to RAISE YOUR STANDARDS and UPGRADE YOUR LIFE
WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 224: Life Lessons from a Recovering People Pleaser
11/10/2025
Episode 224: Life Lessons from a Recovering People Pleaser
Okay, babe… let’s talk about people pleasing, because this episode is me calling myself (and you) all the way out. For years, I thought being the “chill, supportive, easygoing” partner made me good. But in reality? I was just betraying myself over and over. I wasn’t setting boundaries, I was building walls and then wondering why everything exploded when I finally snapped. I share the story of how I went from spending every damn Saturday house-hunting for someone else’s dream home (that I wasn’t even living in!) to realising I was overextending myself because I was scared to look “selfish.” In this episode, I break down: The difference between having boundaries and just having preferences. Why your energy is sacred (and not everyone deserves access). How to stop rescuing grown-ass adults and hand their emotional baggage right back to them. What “proof over promises” really looks like in love and life. And why the only people pissed about your boundaries are the ones who benefited when you didn’t have any. This is your permission slip to stop apologizing for protecting your peace. You can be kind and firm. You can be soft andstrong. You can be compassionate and say “no.” Stop gaslighting your feelings just to make other people comfortable. If that makes you “too much,” so be it. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 223: Stop Calling It Love…You’re Just Abandoning Yourself
11/02/2025
Episode 223: Stop Calling It Love…You’re Just Abandoning Yourself
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, I’m calling BS on the fluffy, feel-good version of “self-love.” Because let’s be real… bubble baths and affirmations don’t fix years of self-abandonment. I get raw about my own story of being the “ultimate caretaker”, the one holding everything together, doing the emotional labor, and calling it love. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t love, it was survival. And it left me exhausted, resentful, and disconnected as hell. I break down what it really looks like to stop people-pleasing and start standing the f*ck up for yourself…even when it makes others uncomfortable. Here’s what we get into: Why “acting single” in a relationship might be the healthiest move you ever make How to spot the sneaky ways you keep abandoning yourself What self-respect and emotional discipline actually look like (hint: it’s not being the chill girl) The power of saying “no,” sending the meal back, and owning your standards Why advocating for your needs is a flex…not a flaw How to rebuild self-trust and stop outsourcing your worth By the end, I’ll remind you of one thing every woman needs to hear: No one’s coming to save you, babe…you’re the damn hero of your own story. It’s time to stop settling, stop shrinking, and start showing up like the woman who knows exactly who she is. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 222: How to Stop the Emotional Whiplash of Fearful Avoidance
10/26/2025
Episode 222: How to Stop the Emotional Whiplash of Fearful Avoidance
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I dive into the fearful avoidant attachment style sometimes called anxious avoidant and the blind spots that come with it. This was once my dominant attachment style, and even now I can see how it still pops up in relationships. Unlike anxious or dismissive avoidants, the fearful avoidant flips between hyper-activation (all emotion, seeking closeness, reassurance, and validation) and deactivation (withdrawal, coldness, the “ick,” detachment). This creates emotional whiplash for partners, leaving them unsure which version of you they’re going to get. Here’s what I unpack in this episode: Logic vs. Emotion – How fearful avoidants have access to both, but rarely integrate them at the same time. The Pendulum Swing – Why you may go from desperate for closeness one week to completely withdrawn the next. The “Lost Myself” Myth – Why feeling like you “lost yourself” in a relationship often just means hidden parts of you have been triggered. The Mask Crumbling – How the persona you’ve built (cool girl, caregiver, rescuer, strong independent woman) eventually cracks under stress, leaving you scattered and disconnected. The Integration Work – Using both emotion and logic as data, building authenticity, and leaning into micro-moments of vulnerability instead of extreme swings. Practical Tips – For anxious-leaning FAs: keep a scorecard of consistency and non-negotiables so you don’t abandon yourself. For avoidant-leaning FAs: practice small disclosures and direct asks to build capacity for intimacy without shutting down. At the core, being a fearful avoidant isn’t about shame, it’s about learning integration, self-compassion, and balance. When you use both emotion and logic together, you can move toward secure love without the constant pendulum swings. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 221: Why Logic Won’t Save You in Love
10/19/2025
Episode 221: Why Logic Won’t Save You in Love
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I’m breaking down the blind spots of the dismissive avoidant attachment style. If you’ve ever felt confused about why you (or your partner) shut down, withdraw, or over-rely on logic in relationships, this episode will give you clarity and a new way forward. Here’s what I dive into: Logic vs. Love – Why relying on logic and analysis won’t create real intimacy. Where It Starts – How childhood environments that dismissed emotions shaped these defense patterns. The Hidden Cycle – How conflicts get rationalized away, leading to the same fights and disconnection repeating. Cut Off From Pain – Why avoiding your emotions also cuts you off from your body’s wisdom and intuition. The Path Forward – Learning to balance logic with emotion, validate your own needs, and stay in connection even when it feels uncomfortable. This episode is for both dismissive avoidants who want to understand themselves better, and anxious partners who are trying to make sense of their avoidant loved ones. My goal is to bring empathy, clarity, and practical tools to both sides so you can create more safety and connection. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 220: The Hidden Patterns Keeping You Stuck in Love
10/12/2025
Episode 220: The Hidden Patterns Keeping You Stuck in Love
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I dig into the blind spots of anxious attachment, the hidden patterns that keep you stuck in the same cycles, even when you think you’ve “done the work.” I explain why reflection alone isn’t enough, because you can only reflect on what you’re consciously aware of. Blind spots live in the shadows the parts of yourself you deny, repress, or don’t even know exist. And until you shine light on those, you’ll keep repeating the same patterns in love, friendships, and even business. Here’s what I explore in this episode: Your strength as someone with anxious attachment The shadow side of that strength How failing to hold boundaries often leads to resentment, misplaced blame, and feeling abandoned. Why sourcing safety from within not from your partner is the foundation of secure love. How building a full life outside of relationships makes you more attractive, grounded, and secure. Why pacing yourself in love is crucial to avoiding cycles of clinginess, panic, and destabilisation. I also share a personal story about noticing when I wanted my partner to uphold a boundary that was actually mine to hold a powerful reminder that no one else can honour your limits for you. At the heart of this episode, I want you to know: your open heart is a gift. But your lesson is learning to protect it, pace it, and recognise your value, so you don’t hand it over to just anyone without discernment. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Episode 219: The Real Reason Anxious + Avoidant Relationships NEVER Work (Until You Do This)
10/05/2025
Episode 219: The Real Reason Anxious + Avoidant Relationships NEVER Work (Until You Do This)
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I dive into one of the most common yet challenging dynamics I see: the anxious–avoidant relationship. Instead of just giving surface-level advice like “communicate better” or “give each other more space,” I explore how shadow work is the real key to creating lasting change. I share some of my own experiences with anxiety, avoidance, and love and why I realised that traditional approaches often just reinforce the old wounds. For me, shadow work has been the tool that allowed me to see the parts of myself I had disowned and projected onto partners, which kept me locked in unhealthy cycles. Here’s what I cover: Why anxious and avoidant partners are so magnetised to each other. How your partner often mirrors the parts of yourself you’ve hidden or rejected. Why symptom management (like “better communication”) doesn’t actually heal the root cause. The difference between chemistry and true compatibility. How I personally decide when a relationship is worth working on vs. when it’s time to leave. The questions I ask myself when I feel stuck in old patterns. This work has taught me that true growth in relationships comes from embodiment, not just intellectual understanding. That’s exactly why I created The Connected Woman to help women integrate shadow work with practices that shift attachment patterns, so we can all show up more secure, more authentic, and more fully ourselves in love. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 218: Mirror, Mirror: A Conversation About Call-Outs with Connected Woman Alum Heather Rotan
09/29/2025
Ep 218: Mirror, Mirror: A Conversation About Call-Outs with Connected Woman Alum Heather Rotan
Today’s conversation is all about the OWN IT part of CLOCK IT, OWN IT, CLEAN IT UP…and who better to share than the accountability queen herself, my amazing client Heather! Heather is a mother of three, a healthcare executive, and a self-proclaimed attention whore who loves deeply, leads fiercely, and never backs down from a challenge…and she proved that when she finally (after THREE FUCKING YEARS!) signed up for The Connected Woman! Facing down your patterns is never easy. But Heather makes it look that way with the way she owns them. It can take fucking AGES for people to clean up their patterns because they spend so long pretending they don’t exist. Not an issue for Heather. And I’m hopeful as FUCK she’s going to inspire you all to take a long, hard look in the mirror…because if everyone owned their shit the way she does, they’d hit a breakthrough a whole lot faster. CONNECT WITH HEATHER: Instagram: WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 217: Self-Abandonment in Relationships: How to Stop Betraying Yourself
09/22/2025
Ep 217: Self-Abandonment in Relationships: How to Stop Betraying Yourself
Not to break your entire self-image or whatever, but abandoning all your needs and desires for the sake of your partner actually doesn’t make you a good person. Sorry not sorry. Sure, maybe it feels good to oh-so-f*cking-selflessly lay your needs down to fulfill your partner’s instead. To be the “good girl.” The “cool girl.” To play the hero in his story. Right up until resentment starts burning so badly you think you’ve got a f*cking ulcer. Truthfully, self-abandonment is a relationship-killer. But it can be a subtle one, especially when you don’t know what the fuck self-abandonment even LOOKS like. That’s why I’m walking you through all the ways self-abandonment slinks out of the shadows and sets you on the path to complete relationship meltdown—and how to finally shine a light on it so you can clock it, own it, and clean it up. Martyrhood isn’t a good look on you, babe. It’s time you tried something new. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 216: 10 Brutal Truths About Anxious Attachment (This Will Piss You Off)
09/15/2025
Ep 216: 10 Brutal Truths About Anxious Attachment (This Will Piss You Off)
Warning: today’s episode might just piss you off. It’s to be expected, all right? I am called the Trigger Queen, after all. (If you’re new here, just know: it’s all said with love.) Buckle up, because today, I've got some fucking brutal truth bombs to drop about anxious attachment. If you’re someone who anxiously attaches, at least a couple of these are probably going to make you fucking furious. But you know what? Fucking good. Sometimes we need a good shakeup to get our heads out of our asses and actually start shifting things. The reality is, the patterns that you're running through right now are keeping you stuck. And until something brings you to your fucking senses, you’re just going to keep running on that hamster wheel of heartbreak and dating the same damn person in a different outfit. And coming from someone who’s been there…if you can actually let these land, they're going to change how you do love forever. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 215: Trust the Process - A Conversation with Client Rochelle Powell
09/08/2025
Ep 215: Trust the Process - A Conversation with Client Rochelle Powell
Welcome to a super special episode, friends: today, we have the beautiful Rochelle Powell here with us! Rochelle is one of my incredible clients, and I've been working with her for a few years now. She is an ever-evolving woman determined to experience all aspects of herself by fiercely leaning into her edges and exploring what it truly means to come home to herself. She moves through life with curiosity, a wild spirit, and a deep devotion to truth and connection, and her story is one a lot of you are going to relate to. From unwillingly listening to the podcast (still dying over that one, wait until you hear the story!) to hosting one of her own, Rochelle’s journey is one for the books…or the headphones, apparently. Buckle up, babes. This one’s going to challenge you. CONNECT WITH ROCHELLE: Follow Rochelle on Instagram: WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 214: Become Okay With Being Alone
09/01/2025
Ep 214: Become Okay With Being Alone
If you identify as a strong, independent woman who is 100% fine being alone, this one is for you… Because I’m calling bullshit. Being single is not the same thing as being alone. And sure, maybe you’re fine being single…but what do you fill that gap with? TV? Social media scrolling? Going out with friends? Swiping on the apps until your weekend is booked up? “Wait, you want me to sit there, alone, with nothing to distract me from feeling a real, genuine EMOTION for once? I think the FUCK NOT.” Yeah. That’s what I fucking thought. Most people cannot stand actually being alone with themselves. But if you made yourself sit with your sadness, your anger, whatever it is…you might actually discover that feeling all the feels, even the ones we’re so terrified to feel, is a deeply beautiful thing. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 213: Solo Travel, Self-Talk, and Skydiving: A Fearless Conversation with Connected Woman Alum Dily
08/25/2025
Ep 213: Solo Travel, Self-Talk, and Skydiving: A Fearless Conversation with Connected Woman Alum Dily
Let’s be honest: most people will sit down, listen to a podcast, give their best “OMG! So true, bestie!” and then promptly move the fuck on with their lives. My guest today is NOT one of those people. My dear friend Dily is here to share about her Connected Woman journey, and let me tell you…she is an amazing example of the kind of dedication and courage self-development work actually takes. Dily is one of the most fearless, determined, proactive human beings in the world. When she learns something new, she doesn’t just let it go in one ear and out the other; she actively implements it. She is passionate about growth and stretching herself past her comfort zone, and I know for fucking CERTAIN that’s a skill we all need more practice with. This is a woman who is happy to take herself on a trip for scuba-diving lessons…in shark-infested waters…where a fucking CYCLONE just tore through, no less…but struggles deeply with opening herself up and being vulnerable. Yet she’s here today to share with all of you, and I could not be prouder. We could all learn a thing or two from Dily. CONNECT WITH DILY: Follow Dily’s travel adventures on Instagram: WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 212: 20 Non-Negotiables You Need to Have in a Relationship
08/18/2025
Ep 212: 20 Non-Negotiables You Need to Have in a Relationship
What are your non-negotiables for a relationship? How many can you list? Ten? Five? Three? Can you name even ONE must-have for the relationship you long for, or is it just…anything goes? It is 2025, bitch. We are not fucking around with ANYTHING GOES around here. You NEED non-negotiables. You NEED things that are an immediate HELL NO and things that are an immediate FUCK YES. Otherwise, you’re going straight to Situationship City with every Tom, Dick, and Harry that strolls by, because you’ll never know if you’re actually aligned until something happens months down the line that you can’t rationalize away with your rose-colored glasses. If you’re not sure where to start, you don’t have to be. I’ve got twenty non-negotiables you can add to your list right now. Listen, copy, paste–then add a few of your own. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 211: How To ACTUALLY Become Secure
08/11/2025
Ep 211: How To ACTUALLY Become Secure
There is so much fluff out there when it comes to what it takes to become a secure woman that it can get you SO fucking mixed up. Luckily, I’m not here to bullshit you. Becoming secure takes fucking WORK. It’s hard. It’s scary. It’s vulnerable. And it’s all so fucking worth it. There are four shifts I made in order to become secure–and I’m sharing them with you today. They’re not fluff. They’re not easy. They’re sure as fuck not comfortable. But when you make them, you won’t recognize the woman you were before you started…and trust me, it’s the best change you can possibly make for yourself. Yeah, for YOURSELF, love—no one else. Isn’t it time you chose YOU for once? Let’s start shifting. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 210: 10 Tiny Micro-Habits to Increase Your Feminine Energy
08/04/2025
Ep 210: 10 Tiny Micro-Habits to Increase Your Feminine Energy
If you think the feminine is all frilly dresses, keeping house, and speaking softly… You’ve fallen for the simplified caricature of feminine energy the internet likes to latch on to. That is NOT the fucking feminine…though it can be one expression of it. If you’ve been performing what you THINK the feminine is, and you’re just finding out now, I’ve got just the thing for you. We’re going to get you anchored into your ACTUAL feminine energy—all it takes is some intentional habit-building. I’ve got ten micro-habits you can work into your life without a hitch to help you embody your feminine energy. And when we’re done, you’re going to be a different woman. I won’t promise it will be comfortable. But I can promise it will be FUCKING WORTH IT. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 209: When the Wounds Close: A Conversation with Retreat Alum Abigail Elizabeth
07/28/2025
Ep 209: When the Wounds Close: A Conversation with Retreat Alum Abigail Elizabeth
We know her, we love her, and we are THRILLED to have her back…everyone please welcome Abigail Elizabeth, business owner, badass mother of two, and an overall gem of a human being. Abigail was on just a few months ago to chat about her experience doing the work and attending my retreats, and now she’s back to tell us how her life has continued to shift and change since. It can be easy to start out strong when you’re doing the work…then start to fall off the wagon after some time has gone by. But Abigail is an amazing example of what doing the work long-term looks like: the ups and downs, the payoff, and the incredible ripple effects that can transform the lives of your entire family. You’re not JUST doing the work for you, babe. This can stop the generational trauma train, last stop YOU—and Abigail’s going to tell us how. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 208: You Have Standards for Your Whole Life… So Why Are You Settling in Dating?
07/21/2025
Ep 208: You Have Standards for Your Whole Life… So Why Are You Settling in Dating?
Your skincare routine? Precise. Your career? Thriving. Your friendships? Healthy. Your wardrobe? Curated. Your dating life? FUCKED. What tf happened there, exactly? You have top-notch standards for every single area of your life…but for some reason, you’re tolerating all kinds of bullshit when it comes to dating. Not anymore. Sit down, strap in, and get ready to set—and HOLD—some actual fucking standards instead of giving someone a dozen chances to meet them when we both know they’re never going to. (But it’s so nice to get to blame them when it doesn’t work out yet again, isn’t it?) Nothing’s going to change before you do. Let’s get to work. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Sign up for SWIPE RIGHT, my signature dating program that is going to help you attract genuine, long-term love: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 207: AI, Authenticity, and Emotional Manipulation in Modern Dating
07/14/2025
Ep 207: AI, Authenticity, and Emotional Manipulation in Modern Dating
Let me see if I’ve got this right: You’re chatting with this man, and he’s everything you’ve ever dreamed of. His answers are thought-provoking and emotionally intelligent. He asks questions back. He always has the perfect response…like, always. Every fucking time. And that’s not even a little suspicious to you? Odds are, you haven’t stumbled upon your soulmate, babe—you’ve just fallen in love with ChatGPT. AI is ruining and revolutionizing dating at the same time. Yes, it makes it incredibly easy to put together an intriguing bio or craft the perfect response…but at the cost of true authenticity + actual connection. Now, AI isn’t the enemy here—in fact, there are some really fucking amazing ways you cna use AI to uplevel your dating game without pulling some manipulative bullshit. But it’s a fine line to walk, and most people don’t take the kind of caution they need to take. Let’s talk about the importance of discernment in dating…especially when it comes to AI use. There’s more than one way to end up catfished. (Or, shall we say…CHAT-fished?) WORK WITH MICHELLE: Sign up for SWIPE RIGHT, my signature dating program that is going to help you attract genuine, long-term love: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 206: Why Fantasizing Your Way Through Dating is F*cking You Over
07/07/2025
Ep 206: Why Fantasizing Your Way Through Dating is F*cking You Over
So…I did the thing. I am officially back on the dating apps. That’s right, my loves—I’m back in the dating trenches. All the things you’re going through? I’m going through them right along with you. (I figured if I'm releasing a program about dating, it's only fair that I do it alongside you, right?) But as long as I’m here, I’m going to talk about some of the reasons why you might not be having much success with dating. First and foremost, the fact that you’ll go on one date with a man and come home already planning the wedding. It’s great to be excited when you meet someone new. But it’s TOO fucking easy to get swept straight into a full-blown fantasy about who this person is…when in reality, you have no idea who they actually are. “But Michelle, we’re soulmates!” No, you’re STRANGERS. And you need to remember that before you dive too deep into something you don’t even want. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Sign up for SWIPE RIGHT, my signature dating program that is going to help you attract genuine, long-term love: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 205: 5 Signs YOU are the Red Flag
06/30/2025
Ep 205: 5 Signs YOU are the Red Flag
If you’re racking your brain trying to figure out why you can’t seem to find “the one” for you…sit down a sec. I think I might’ve solved it. So. Your relationships keep failing. You keep attracting emotionally unavailable men. You can’t find someone willing to commit. You can’t track down a secure man. Your dating woes seem to have no fucking end. Now, hear me out on this one… It sounds to me like YOU’RE the fucking problem. No, think about it—what’s the common denominator in all these relationships? Different men, different circumstances, all with the same outcome, and the only consistent factor is—you guessed it—you. “No, Michelle, it’s them!” Are you sure about that? Because I smell bullshit. But the only way to be sure is to take a good, hard look at what you might be doing to contribute, so… Let’s talk about five red flags you might be flying without even realizing it. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Sign up for SWIPE RIGHT, my signature dating program that is going to help you attract genuine, long-term love: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 204: Secure as F*ck: 5 Dating Don'ts Secure Women NEVER Do
06/23/2025
Ep 204: Secure as F*ck: 5 Dating Don'ts Secure Women NEVER Do
At the very beginning of this year, I went through a pretty devastating breakup. It’s been nearly seven months now, and I haven’t dated at all since then. Not just because I wasn’t going to jump right on the apps after such a difficult breakup—a girl’s gotta process, after all—but because I just didn’t have a desire to date. Now, that’s starting to change. I can feel myself on the verge of being ready to date again…which is super exciting. But it also has me thinking a lot about the way a secure woman approaches dating compared to the way insecure women approach dating, and honestly? We need to talk about this. There are some super common threads I’ve seen among the clients I’ve supported through dating, and I want to help you avoid falling prey to the same. So let’s go over five things secure women NEVER do while dating. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Sign up for SWIPE RIGHT, my signature dating program that is going to help you attract genuine, long-term love: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 203: Behold, a Man! - A Conversation with Somatic Practitioner Jack Bohannan
06/16/2025
Ep 203: Behold, a Man! - A Conversation with Somatic Practitioner Jack Bohannan
Unf*ck Your Relationship may be for the girlies (mostly) but this one? This one’s for the boys. Okay, real talk, this podcast is for everyone. (Love you all, proud of you for being here, XOXO.) But today, we are going to be having some guy talk…because we have an actual guy on the podcast. That’s right: the elusive man has appeared on Unf*ck Your Relationships. Everyone please welcome Jack Bohannan! Jack is a certified somatica relationship coach who combines the experiential approach of somatica with elements of the Ideal Parent Figure, or IPF, protocol by Daniel Brown, which is a method developed to treat attachment issues. He supports women in healing their relationships with men and empowers men to relate better to women and themselves. This one’s going to be juuuicy, friends. I can feel it. And don’t worry…I know you’ve got questions for the man in the room. Jack’s going to help us get to the bottom of some of the greatest mysteries surrounding men…and maybe even turn the tables on me a little bit. WORK WITH JACK: Are you an anxiously attached girly? Struggling to connect with an avoidant partner? Get Jack’s FREE webinar now: Ready to release old attachment patterns + create happier, healthier connections? Work with Jack: CONNECT WITH JACK: Connect with Jack on Instagram: WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 202: Wrestling for Control: A Discussion With "The Experience" Member Kellie Irene
06/09/2025
Ep 202: Wrestling for Control: A Discussion With "The Experience" Member Kellie Irene
I’ve said it before, I’ll say it again, I’ll say it every fucking time I have a guest on the podcast: I am so fucking excited to introduce you all to one of my beautiful clients, Kellie Irene! Kellie has done Awakening Her, The Experience, and my retreats, so she’s been in my world for a while. She absolutely embodies main character energy. She’s bold, courageous, vivacious…I love being around her, and I have to bring her magic into this space so you all can experience it, too. But Kellie didn’t start out this confident. And this is one of the most f*cking impressive “how it started vs. how it’s going” stories you’ll ever hear. But I’ll let Kellie tell the story… CONNECT WITH KELLIE: Be the first to listen when Kellie launches her podcast, THE WOMAN OF YOUR DREAMS: Follow Kellie’s wrestling journey: Connect with Kellie: WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 201: Why You Feel Like You’re Too Much and Not Enough — At the Same Time
06/02/2025
Ep 201: Why You Feel Like You’re Too Much and Not Enough — At the Same Time
“I’m too needy. I ask for too much. I’m too emotional.” “I’m not strong enough. I’m not confident enough. I’m not cruisy enough.” Too much AND not enough…all at the same time? Yes, it is possible…and no, you’re not the only one. I see this shit every day in my work. Women who feel simultaneously like they are too much, too needy, too difficult, while also feeling like they aren’t enough to be chosen and cherished. That pendulum swing? It’s no fucking joke—and until you figure out how to regulate it, you’re going to keep swinging until you’re so dizzy you can’t even think straight. Tired of your too-muchness? Ready to kiss not-enoughness goodbye? Let’s get it done, love. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 200: Truth or Trigger: Celebrating 200 Episodes of UFYR by Answering YOUR Relationship Questions!
05/26/2025
Ep 200: Truth or Trigger: Celebrating 200 Episodes of UFYR by Answering YOUR Relationship Questions!
I can’t believe I’m about to say this (well, I actually can) but… WELCOME TO THE 200TH EPISODE OF UNF*CK YOUR RELATIONSHIPS! Fuuuck, has this been a JOURNEY. Most podcasts don’t even break double digits, let alone triple, let alone hit fucking 200. Can I just take a second to brag on myself? Way to go, Michelle. I’m so proud of you. And I’m proud of YOU, my loves; every single one of you that has shown up wanting to do the work. Wanting to learn. Wanting to reconnect to yourself and to others. I see you. I’m so fucking proud of you for being here. You’ve given me the gift of my dream come true…so I want to give something back today. I reached out and asked for your relationship situations you could use a little coaching on, and you all DELIVERED. Today, we’re playing a little game called TRUTH OR TRIGGER. Let’s see if those stories you’re telling yourself about your relationships are ACTUALLY the truth…or a story your triggers are trying to disguise as the truth. WORK WITH MICHELLE: These aren’t just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD. Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 199: Embodiment is Essential. Here's Why
05/19/2025
Ep 199: Embodiment is Essential. Here's Why
So. Let’s review. You’re a high-achieving, self-aware woman. You’ve clocked your patterns and traced them back to their cause. You’ve been in therapy. You’ve read the books. You’ve listened to the podcasts. You’ve done breathwork, meditation, EFT tapping, all the things… And you haven’t made any real fucking progress. Why? Why have you done all the things, but aren’t getting “better?” Because mindset work isn’t enough. Because awareness without embodiment is just you doing mental cartwheels AROUND your trauma, not actually integrating it. Let’s talk about how to fix that. WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 198: Sweet Surrender: A Conversation with Embodiment Coach Chené O'Brien
05/12/2025
Ep 198: Sweet Surrender: A Conversation with Embodiment Coach Chené O'Brien
When I tell you this particular guest of mine is one of the most joyous, radiant, embodied women that I know…I hope you know that I fucking mean it. And I’m not just saying it because she’s my client. Meet Chené O’Brien: a client of mine, an embodiment coach, and the owner of the hottest f*cking accent ever. Chené’s healing journey started from a place of constant self-abandonment…but she clocked that pattern, embraced the pieces of herself that kept trying to throw her needs to the curb, and is now out here helping others connect to their own embodied wisdom. Her story brought me to tears. Genuinely. And now it’s your turn. So without further ado…let’s turn the mic over to Chené, shall we? WORK WITH CHENÉ: Want to work with Chené? Uh, yeah you fucking do. Head to her website now to get started: CONNECT WITH CHENÉ: Follow Chené on Instagram: WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 197: Why You Keep Losing Yourself in Relationships (and What to Do About It)
05/05/2025
Ep 197: Why You Keep Losing Yourself in Relationships (and What to Do About It)
It all happens so fast. One minute you’re living your best life. You’re hitting the gym. You’re journaling. You’re doing your embodiment practices. You’re going out with your friends. You’re going on solo dates. You have hobbies that you love… And then you meet someone. It is astonishing how QUICKLY I’ve seen women go from their glow-up era to “Wait, did I say the right thing? Did I mess up? Oh, he wants to hang out Friday—I’d better cancel my plans. Did that come across as too needy? Was I too much? What if he—” GIRL. TAKE A BREATH. Even when you’re a self-aware human, it’s easy to get swept up in the excitement of a new relationship. You can easily end up abandoning yourself without even realizing it’s happening…because when it does happen, it isn’t anything catastrophic. It just…happens. A little here. A bit more there. Until suddenly, when something finally goes wrong in the relationship and you bother to look up at your life for the first time in a while, you realize that you don’t even recognize the person you’ve become. But WHY do we do this—and how can we stop? WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Ep 196: Why You’re Scared of Healthy Love (Even Though You Swear That’s What You Want)
04/28/2025
Ep 196: Why You’re Scared of Healthy Love (Even Though You Swear That’s What You Want)
Everybody talks about wanting a man who COMMUNICATES, who’s HONEST, who CHOOSES YOU wholeheartedly… Until one actually shows up. And you go running like your f*cking ass is on fire. If you grew up without a secure attachment, your brain is wired to read insecurity as desirable. Which means your brain basically can’t tell the difference between a bear attack and a man telling you he really, really likes you. Sound ridiculous? Yeah, no f*cking kidding. But it’s true. And until you learn how to teach it otherwise, you’re going to keep treating every emotionally available man like he’s trying to eat you…and not in the fun way. So. Let’s get you recalibrated, shall we? WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a shadow work course for the woman who is ready to break free from the anxious/avoidant dance in relationships and step into unfuckwithable confidence, security, and self-worth: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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