Unf*ck Your Relationships
In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, we’re building the blueprint for your most grounded, self-led, and successful year ever. Not because the calendar magically fixes your life - but because you decide to show up as the woman who no longer drags old chaos into her new chapter. 2026 is a blank slate. A reset. A clean energetic line in the sand. And the version of you who thrives next year is built from identity, habits, emotional maturity, and standards… not “new year, new me” delusion. I walk you through the exact ways to anchor into self-belief, detox 2025 without spiralling...
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In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we’re stepping into the most misunderstood and most misused part of feminine energy: the dark feminine. Not the TikTok version. Not the “manipulate him back” bullshit. The real dark feminine. The part of you that is bold, grounded, self-protective, deeply self-respecting, and absolutely unwilling to keep abandoning herself for crumbs. Most women are living 90% in their light feminine… the sweet, nurturing, soft version of themselves and then wonder why they feel drained, overlooked, over-giving, mothering grown men, and acting like...
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EP 227: How to Level Up So Fast It Feels Illegal In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, we’re diving into the identity level shifts required to level up so quickly it almost feels wrong. The truth? You’re not stuck because of timing, luck, or the men you date. You’re stuck because your nervous system is still wired for chaos, crumbs, and chasing and you keep choosing what’s familiar over what’s actually good for you. I break down the real reasons you keep looping in the same patterns and how to step into the version of you who doesn’t tolerate inconsistency, confusion, or...
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In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships*, we’re going deep into the truth about female friendships, support, and the energetics behind the women you keep around you. Because here’s the reality: You cannot build a powerful life while surrounding yourself with women who are secretly competing with you, resenting you, or only “supportive” when you’re not doing better than them. And yet so many women tolerate friendships that drain them, make them shrink, or leave them feeling like they have to downplay their wins so someone else doesn’t get jealous. That’s not friendship....
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WORK WITH MICHELLE: Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: CONNECT WITH MICHELLE: Instagram: Website:
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Okay, babe… let’s talk about people pleasing, because this episode is me calling myself (and you) all the way out. For years, I thought being the “chill, supportive, easygoing” partner made me good. But in reality? I was just betraying myself over and over. I wasn’t setting boundaries, I was building walls and then wondering why everything exploded when I finally snapped. I share the story of how I went from spending every damn Saturday house-hunting for someone else’s dream home (that I wasn’t even living in!) to realising I was overextending myself because I was scared to look...
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In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationships, I’m calling BS on the fluffy, feel-good version of “self-love.” Because let’s be real… bubble baths and affirmations don’t fix years of self-abandonment. I get raw about my own story of being the “ultimate caretaker”, the one holding everything together, doing the emotional labor, and calling it love. Spoiler alert: it wasn’t love, it was survival. And it left me exhausted, resentful, and disconnected as hell. I break down what it really looks like to stop people-pleasing and start standing the f*ck up for yourself…even when it...
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In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I dive into the fearful avoidant attachment style sometimes called anxious avoidant and the blind spots that come with it. This was once my dominant attachment style, and even now I can see how it still pops up in relationships. Unlike anxious or dismissive avoidants, the fearful avoidant flips between hyper-activation (all emotion, seeking closeness, reassurance, and validation) and deactivation (withdrawal, coldness, the “ick,” detachment). This creates emotional whiplash for partners, leaving them unsure which version of you they’re going...
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In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, I’m breaking down the blind spots of the dismissive avoidant attachment style. If you’ve ever felt confused about why you (or your partner) shut down, withdraw, or over-rely on logic in relationships, this episode will give you clarity and a new way forward. Here’s what I dive into: Logic vs. Love – Why relying on logic and analysis won’t create real intimacy. Where It Starts – How childhood environments that dismissed emotions shaped these defense patterns. The Hidden Cycle – How conflicts get rationalized away, leading to the same...
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In this episode of Unf*ck Your Relationship, I dig into the blind spots of anxious attachment, the hidden patterns that keep you stuck in the same cycles, even when you think you’ve “done the work.” I explain why reflection alone isn’t enough, because you can only reflect on what you’re consciously aware of. Blind spots live in the shadows the parts of yourself you deny, repress, or don’t even know exist. And until you shine light on those, you’ll keep repeating the same patterns in love, friendships, and even business. Here’s what I explore in this episode: Your strength as...
info_outlineEP 227: How to Level Up So Fast It Feels Illegal
In this episode of Unfck Your Relationships, we’re diving into the identity level shifts required to level up so quickly it almost feels wrong. The truth? You’re not stuck because of timing, luck, or the men you date. You’re stuck because your nervous system is still wired for chaos, crumbs, and chasing and you keep choosing what’s familiar over what’s actually good for you.
I break down the real reasons you keep looping in the same patterns and how to step into the version of you who doesn’t tolerate inconsistency, confusion, or emotional breadcrumbs. This is where your “Secure Her” identity gets built not from goals, but from standards, self-respect, and micro-moments of alignment.
Here’s what I unpack in this episode:
Why You’re Stuck It’s not the universe or bad luck. It’s the identity you’re operating from and the parts of you (anxious girl, avoidant girl, cool girl, little girl) running the show.
Defining Your Next-Level Self Who is “Secure Her”? What does she tolerate? What becomes a hard no? And if the world was watching you 24/7… would you be proud?
Meeting the Version of You Who Already Lives There The you with standards, follow-through, nourishment, rest, boundaries, and self-respect. What does she do that you’re not doing? What has she stopped tolerating?
The Brutal Gap Check Where your life doesn’t match your mouth: who you text, who you sleep with, your friendships, your food, your sleep, and how you talk to yourself. Your results = your standards in action.
Closing the Gap With Micro-Standards One small high-standard action per day. Don’t text him back. Go to bed earlier. Speak up. Walk away from what isn’t a match. Let your nervous system learn that it’s safe to be the new you.
Expecting Backlash + Resistance Old friends will notice. Men who benefitted from your low standards will push back. Your inner child will panic because familiar feels safe. This is GOOD.
Reframing the Discomfort “I’m not losing people I’m losing patterns.” “I’m not being dramatic I’m raising my standards.” “It’s not scary it’s new.”
At the core, leveling up this fast isn’t about becoming someone new. It’s about returning to the version of you who was always there the one with discernment, self-trust, and standards that feel like a full-body yes.
WORK WITH MICHELLE:
Join THE CONNECTED WOMAN, a course for the woman who wants to go from anxious & self-abandoning in relationships to secure, confident and unf*ckwithable: https://michellepanning.com/the-connected-woman
Sign up for THE EXPERIENCE, an exclusive 12-month mentorship experience where you go all in on YOU (aka, you get direct access to me as a mentor, access to every offer I run over your year, and MORE): https://michellepanning.com/the-experience
Sign up for THE AWAKENING RETREATS now before they sell out. These aren't just retreats. These are where we turn your inner chaos into GOLD: https://michellepanning.com/awakening
CONNECT WITH MICHELLE:
Instagram: http://www.instagram.com/michellepanning
Website: http://www.michellepanning.com