245: Are You Creating Drama in Your Marriage? | 3 Toxic Roles You Need to Avoid
Release Date: 04/14/2025
266: Get Back On: One Coupleās Journey to Restore Marriage, Faith & Purpose on Horseback
What to Say & How to Say It
Ever feel like life bucked you off? Whether itās in marriage, business, or faith, the fastest way to win again is to Get Back On. Join Nina Roesner in this powerful and hope-filled episode of What to Say & How to Say It as she interviews Drs. Michelle and Paul LeCompte, DVM, a couple who know firsthand what it means to fallāhardāand get back up with Godās help. Now celebrating 39 years of marriage, theyāre embarking on a horseback journey across southern Ohio to inspire others to Get Back Onāno matter what life throws at you. From healing through lupus, battling addiction, and...
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265: From Unskilled to Spirit-Filled: How to Grow Spiritually and Save Your Marriage
What to Say & How to Say It
Struggling with conflict in your marriage? This episode of What to Say and How to Say It is for you. Join hosts Shy Lewis and Nina Roesner as they unpack the Four Stages of the Competence Model and how it mirrors God's process of transformation in marriageāfrom blindness and blame to wisdom and Christlike love. š” Discover: Why your complaints arenāt working What āconscious incompetenceā means (and why itās actually good news) How God uses conflict to shape us The difference between trust and respect How to partner with the Holy...
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256: When the Past Haunts Your Marriage | Healing Old Wounds & Emotional Triggers
What to Say & How to Say It
Have you or your spouse ever said, "I didnāt sign up for this"? You're not alone. In this episode of What to Say and How to Say It, Nina Roesner sits down with licensed professional counselor Kyle Hargrove to explore the concept of double-edged historyāhow past trauma, bad choices, and unresolved emotional pain can impact your present-day marriage. They get real about: Triggers from your spouseās past (or your own) Why healing is your responsibilityānot your partnerās How past wounds leak into the present Davidās biblical example of lingering consequences What to do when your...
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255: How to Stay Calm in Conflict | Christian Emotional Intelligence Tips for Marriage
What to Say & How to Say It
In todayās episode, hosts Shy Lewis and Nina Roesner talk about how to stay cool in the chaos ā especially when conflict strikes at home. Learn practical tools to manage your emotions, strengthen your self-regulation, and respond rather than react. Weāre diving deep into emotional intelligence (EQ) from a faith-based lens ā how it applies to marriage, what triggers us, and how to build resilience. Whether it's learning how to breathe through an argument or finally naming that hard emotion, this episode is full of tools you can start using today.
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254: Coaching vs. Therapy: How to Know What You (or Your Clients) Really Need
What to Say & How to Say It
Is it time for coachingāor therapy? š¤ In this raw and honest conversation, communication expert Nina Rosner teams up with Kyle Hargrove, a licensed professional counselor with 30+ years of experience, to unpack the often-blurry line between coaching and counseling. They dive into: ā How to spot when someone isnāt ready for coaching ā Key emotional red flags therapists see early on ā Why personal responsibility is non-negotiable in growth ā The difference between forward movement and emotional healing ā Why our culture is in an accountability crisisāand how itās...
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253: When Helping Hurts: How Good Intentions Can Blow Up Your Marriage
What to Say & How to Say It
Welcome back to What to Say & How to Say It! Today weāre tackling a surprising truth: your well-meaning help might be damaging your marriage. Weāll show you two simple, powerful tools to avoid that. Take our free marriage assessment at greaterimpact.org to find out if youāre ready to mentor other couplesāor if your own relationship needs a tune-up. Licensed counselor Kyle Hargrove joins us to unpack the difference between helping and hearingāand why jumping in to fix things often backfires. From car-buying gone wrong to emotional misfires, we share real stories, real tools, and...
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252: How to Handle a Dismissive Avoidant Partner | Attachment Styles & Boundaries in Christian Marriage
What to Say & How to Say It
Welcome to What to Say and How to Say It, the podcast that helps you fix your marriage with wisdom and grace. I'm Shy Lewis, here with Nina Roesner, and today we're diving into the Dismissive Avoidant Attachment Styleāwhat it looks like, why it happens, and how to respond effectively in a Christian marriage. š In this episode, we cover: What dismissive avoidant behavior looks like in a relationship How to communicate clearly and calmly without triggering shutdown Why managing your emotions is key to connection How to set boundaries and follow throughāwithout issuing ultimatums ...
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251: When a Closed Mind Keeps Your Marriage Stuck: Breaking Through the Walls
What to Say & How to Say It
What if the biggest roadblock in your marriage isn't your spouseābut your own mindset? In this powerful episode of What to Say and How to Say It, Nina Roesner and licensed counselor Kyle Hargrove unpack how a closed mind, especially one masked by victimhood or pride, can paralyze growth in a relationship. They share real stories, honest truths, and godly wisdom to help youāand your marriageāmove from stuck to surrendered. Ready for change? It starts with humility. š¬ā¤ļø #MarriageHelp #ChristianMarriage #GreaterImpact #RelationshipGrowth #HumbleHeart
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250: Is Your Partner Attached to Manipulation? | Attachment Styles, Drama & the Truth in Marriage
What to Say & How to Say It
Welcome to todayās episode of What to Say and How to Say It with Nina Roesner and licensed professional counselor Kyle Hargrove. š Today, weāre digging into a difficultābut essentialātopic: š Is your partner attached to manipulation? š Are you unknowingly using manipulation in your own relationship? š Whatās the difference between manipulation and motivation? Weāre unpacking attachment styles, passive-aggressive behaviors, fear of conflict, and the silent lies that erode trust over time. š¶āš«ļøš You might be surprised to learn how common manipulation...
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249: Is Complaining Ruining Your Attachment?
What to Say & How to Say It
Welcome to this episode of What to Say and How to Say It! I'm Nina Roesner, and I'm here with our favorite licensed professional counselor, Kyle Hargrove. Today weāre diving into a tough but important question: Is your complaining ruining your attachment? š” Key Takeaways: How complaining changes your brain What attachment styles really areāand how they form Can someone change their attachment style? (Spoiler: Yes!) What therapists can and canāt say about someone they've never met Why itās dangerous to ādiagnoseā your spouse š Take your next step:...
info_outlineWelcome to this episode of What to Say & How to Say It with Nina Roesner and Licensed Professional Counselor Kyle Hargrove! šļø Today, weāre diving into a powerful (and maybe convicting!) conversation: Are you creating drama in your marriage?
Weāre breaking down the Drama Triangle ā the Victim, the Villain, and the Hero ā three roles you DO NOT want to play if youāre serious about building a healthy, God-honoring relationship.
Are you unintentionally sabotaging your marriage by trying to rescue your spouse?
Are you falling into patterns of blame, manipulation, or emotional chaos?
Or maybe, just maybe, youāre stuck in a cycle you didnāt realize you were even inā¦
This episode is full of wisdom, humor, real-life examples, and biblical encouragement for anyone looking to stop the cycle of drama and start building connection instead.
š Take our FREE marriage assessment at https://greaterimpact.org to find out if coaching is right for you or if there are practical steps you can take to strengthen your marriage TODAY.