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Transcript- Episode 2: We All Belong Here with Giselle Miralles Writing Success Center Faculty
04/04/2023
Transcript- Episode 2: We All Belong Here with Giselle Miralles Writing Success Center Faculty
00:00:00 Giselle But there are also times when I wonder like can I actually do this job? I struggle a lot with imposter syndrome and I feel like that's one place I can really relate with some of my students, is that sometimes, it's really hard to feel like you belong, but you just have to keep reminding yourself that you're here. You've made it here, you do belong here. 00:00:19 Veronica You know, when it comes to a community college as students, we're the reason why everyone else is here. I think a lot of times when people think of students, they're thinking about us growing and learning, but the one thing that I realized talking to my professors is that they are constantly also growing and learning as well, whether they want to admit it or not. 00:00:39 Veronica I'm your host, Veronica Daniel, and I'm a journalism and communication student here on campus. 00:00:45 Liesel I'm Dr. Liesel Reinhart. I teach mass communication and TVR courses here at PCC, and I am thrilled to co-host with my amazing, former student, Veronica. 00:00:55 Veronica On this show, Liesel and I are going to talk with some remarkable individuals from our PCC campus community. These are people you may know, but stories you probably don't. 00:01:04 Liesel It can be tough, but we don't have to do it alone. 00:01:06 Veronica Exactly, because in higher education, we are all under development. A podcast from the Office of Professional and Organizational Development at Pasadena City College, and funded by a PCC Foundation Community Excellence Grant. 00:01:21 Veronica Hi Liesel? 00:01:24 Liesel Well, hello, Veronica. How's it going today? 00:01:26 Veronica I'm doing good. I have a question for you. Can you tell me about a time in your life where you experienced failure? 00:01:35 Liesel Do you mean this week or ...? 00:01:40 Veronica Anytime. 00:01:41 Liesel Sure. Okay, I have a really embarrassing story. I, in college decided to go to my first speech and debate tournament, and I entered in a bunch of different categories because I thought, "Oh, I can do speech and debate." And one of them was impromptu speaking where they give you a quotation and you're supposed to give, it turns out, like a philosophical analysis of the quotation. 00:02:03 Liesel I didn't quite get the full brief. So, I went in and I sang. I ended up like singing like a musical number and doing a performance sort of inspired by the quotation, and like seriously a room of people just staring at me like what is going on? 00:02:22 Liesel I'm like, "Oh, they're blinded by my talent." At that speech tournament, I got the bottom score from every judge in every performance I gave for the entire tournament. And it was like a three-hour bus ride home and I had to sit there and read these ballots that were like trying ... even the ones that were trying to be polite were humiliating. 00:02:45 Liesel I'm surprised I stayed in speech and debate after that. I don't know, I must have been a glutton for punishment, but I'm glad I did. 00:02:53 Veronica You have to tell me what song you were singing. You have to tell me the number that you did because ... 00:02:57 Liesel It was, Come On, Get Happy. It was a quotation about happiness and I'm like, "Forget your troubles. Come on, get happy." I don't know. I don't know. 00:03:06 Veronica That's great. 00:03:07 Liesel Yeah, so any student I ever coached though, after that, I would be like, "Guess what? Whatever you do, it will not be worse than what I did." 00:03:16 Veronica That is such a funny story. 00:03:21 Liesel How about you? Have you ever had any big flops? 00:03:25 Veronica You know, I've had so many random stories of failure. I mean, I came here to PCC in 2016 after dropping out of school in the Bay, and I came to PCC because so many people were telling me how amazing it was, and at the time, I didn't have a car and I was commuting, and it was really, really difficult for me to make that adjustment. 00:03:45 Veronica But the professors and everyone was so nice that I felt like I wanted to do really well. I signed myself up for like five classes. Two weeks in, I dropped two of those classes. I ended up going out of the semester, I had only passed one class and it was with a C. I failed all of my other classes. 00:04:01 Veronica And I eventually did end up dropping out. And like I said, I knew that I wanted to come back to PCC when I was ready to continue my academic journey. But I took that failure with me for a long time. Like I held it and was just like, "What is wrong with you? You know, you had this second chance and you blew it." 00:04:17 Veronica But again, I'm, I'm really happy that I failed in that area because I would not be here if it wasn't for that. 00:04:22 Liesel Well, congratulations for looking that in the face and showing back up. And you got an A in my class. 00:04:29 Veronica I did. I got an A in your class and my journalism class. So, I started off the semester with a 4.0. Went into the next semester getting a 3-8. So, I felt pretty good about that. 00:04:39 Liesel You should. 00:04:40 Veronica Thank you. 00:04:41 Liesel That's a good transition to our conversation you're going to have with our guest today who works in the Success Center, I think. 00:04:48 Veronica She does. And our guest shares my experience with struggling with that transition from high school to college, and just about her failure. But her failures helped her to find her true calling, and also helped her find herself here at PCC. So, I'm excited to talk to this guest. Are you ready? 00:05:07 Liesel I can't wait. 00:05:11 Veronica We are here today with Giselle Miralles. Can you tell me a little bit about yourself? 00:05:16 Giselle Yeah, of course. So, my name is Giselle Miralles. I am an instructor here at PCC in English, and I also am a writing center support faculty member where I help develop the programming there. I hire the tutors, provide workshops, make sure that our students have accessible writing support, and then I also teach English not just with you know, all students here at PCC, but I also teach the CORE scholars. I'm currently the CORE cohort instructors. 00:05:46 Veronica Can you explain what CORE is for those that might not know? 00:05:48 Giselle Yes, of course. So, CORE is an acronym for the Community Overcoming Recidivism through Education. And essentially, what CORE does is it provides support for previously incarcerated and system-impacted students. So, that comes in the form of one having that community where students can lean on each other, having support for which classes that they're supposed to take. 00:06:11 Giselle I think they also provide workshops and they also have a lot of community building activities. So, I know recently, they went on a hike, so sad I couldn't have gone but they do all sorts of things to help these students feel like they belong here at PCC, and that they are capable of passing and getting through and getting their degree here. 00:06:30 Veronica I see. Is there a reason why you specifically decided to work with CORE? 00:06:36 Giselle Yeah, so it goes back in my educational and my academic career. When I was in college, I learned a lot of things about like critical race theory, intersectional feminism, a lot of these big theories that helped me understand my life. 00:06:52 Giselle So, while I was at Cal State Long Beach, there was a professor in particular, Professor Dennis Lopez and he really impacted me in so many ways. I carry what he taught me with me every day that I come to work. But more than anything, he was the first professor of color that I saw in the English department. 00:07:11 Giselle He actually demoed in the class I was part of as part of his interview, and I still remember the poem he taught. It was a Sherman Alexie poem about Walt Whitman, and I just found him so impactful. And just seeing someone teaching literature in front of the classroom that was like me, it was life-changing. 00:07:30 Giselle So, I saw him and I thought like I want to be like him. But not just like that person standing in front of the classroom. It was the way that he taught me. He taught me things that mattered. He showed me that I could do it too, but also, he was very understanding and compassionate. 00:07:47 Giselle So, even in grad school, he'd let me turn stuff in late and I think a lot of people have this idea of colleges being difficult and unrelenting, but he showed me it could be something else. So, from him, I just really wanted to teach. That's one thing. 00:08:04 Giselle Another thing that's impacted me to want to do this work. So, with that knowledge of critical race theory and social justice, was my time working in the Orange County Juvenile Hall. I worked there for three years as an English language development assistant. 00:08:20 Giselle When I graduated with my bachelor's, I had no idea what I was going to do. I was on like EDJOIN, and just applying to any job I saw. So, when I applied for the job, I didn't even realize what it was, I just applied. 00:08:31 Giselle I got an interview and it was in the interview where they told me like this is for a position in a juvenile facility. And I was like, oh, okay. Turns out I got the job and they kind of threw me in there. So, I had a short orientation and then it was actually in the juvenile hall. 00:08:49 Giselle So, my first experience walking through multiple locked doors, having to have the staff buzz me in to get into like what's essentially a school. And then during the actual orientation, they really just taught us safety stuff. But what they didn't teach us was how to interact with the students. 00:09:07 Giselle So, I got all this like safety information and they made it seem like it was kind of dangerous. That's the kind of idea they put in your head when the focus is on safety. But once I actually got into the classroom my first day, I was so lucky to be paired with a teacher who really cared about these students. 00:09:24 Giselle Not everyone in there does. Some teachers see them as criminals (I hate to say that) - but that is just how some of them see them. But this teacher, she really saw them and she's still my dear friend today. She really saw them for who they were and she wanted them to do better. So, with that sort of mentorship, I really grew into that role. 00:09:41 Giselle But my first day, they were making gingerbread houses, and I was walking through the classroom, she told me, "Just be comfortable, just be yourself, they'll love you." And I had no idea how to interact with the students but I just was like, "Okay, well, I'll just talk to them like any other student." 00:09:57 Giselle And I still remember, I asked a student, "Oh, that's a great gingerbread house. Can you tell me like what you did with it?" And he was like, "Well, this guy just got like shot at in front of his house and this is what's going on here." And I was taken aback by that. 00:10:10 Giselle But later on, I learned he was just trying to shock me. But all the students in there are just students. They want to do well, they want someone to believe in them. It really took the theory that I learned in grad school and made me put it into practice, and I'm also system-impacted. And it wasn't until CORE that I understood what that was. 00:10:29 Giselle My brother is previously incarcerated and seeing what he's gone through and what he continues to go through to today - we have a film documentary shown here at PCC called Almost Home that CORE brought and one of my colleagues in English brought to campus. 00:10:43 Giselle And it's about students who are overcoming recidivism, returning back to jail, life after prison. And I see my brother so much in that, and my hope and dreams that he'll come to PCC and be part of the CORE Program as well because I see the struggles and it's us that's helping him through it. Me, my mom, and my sister. 00:11:02 Veronica I was just wondering if you could tell me a little bit more and how that has changed not just your life but your perspective in terms of what you're doing in your career. 00:11:11 Giselle So, for me, my brother has always been the black sheep in terms of like he's labeled himself that, but he struggled a lot throughout the years with several things. The time when he was incarcerated wasn't the first time he was incarcerated. It was just the first time that it really impacted me because he had been incarcerated before. 00:11:30 Giselle The time when he was incarcerated and it impacted me, it was really hard because it was the first time that I really saw adult jail because I had been in juvenile hall working there. But to go through court with him, to visit him while he was in jail, to get the phone calls from jail, it was really difficult. 00:11:47 Giselle When I went to visit him, and walking into the jail, like I only went once because it was hard. I thought it wouldn't impact me because I had already been through the juvenile hall. But that experience of going to jail to visit someone you love, having to see them behind glass, it's hard. It's not easy. I can never understand what it feels like to be incarcerated. That is far worse than what I've experienced. 00:12:09 Giselle But watching my brother go through it, it really personalized all the theory that I already learned, all the experiences I had in the juvenile hall, it brought it home to me. Having to worry about him, waiting for his phone calls and having that prompt come up - "You have a call from an inmate in so-and-so facility." 00:12:29 Giselle Accepting that call, talking to him for the allotted amount of time he can, never it being too far from my mind that he was calling me from a phone in jail. It really just made everything that I learned in school real. Everything that I saw in the juvenile hall, more personal to me. 00:12:48 Giselle So, we still deal with the repercussions. Even though he's no longer incarcerated, watching him trying to be stable working through his mental health issues, working through his alcoholism, watching him trying to find a job and keep it because the system that's set up, sets up previously incarcerated folks for failure. 00:13:08 Giselle Ultimately, you walk out with a felony, good luck finding a job. It's unfair, it's wrong, it's unjust. Watching him still struggle every day with this thing on his record that doesn't define him as a person, but follows him around. Like I know the person he is, I know his heart, I love my brother dearly. But to watch him struggle and to see the roadblocks that are set in front of him, like it makes it hard for him. 00:13:32 Giselle Sometimes, he wants to just give up. I take him with me in the classroom all the time, like he's always with me because I just want him to do better. 00:13:40 Giselle And when I see my students do well and know that they can do it, it gives me hope that my brother can do it too. It's just a matter of putting your mind to it and doing your best that you can with the systemic oppressions that do exist, because ultimately, we can't ignore that. 00:13:54 Giselle It isn't just about pulling yourself up by your bootstraps. It's trying to navigate the system that's been set up to have these individuals fail. These systemic oppressions that are intentional. So, it's made me want to fight even more, not just support the students that I have, but fight even more towards a more just future. Particularly, in terms of how it relates to incarceration. 00:14:17 Veronica I like the way that you said that. I think the other thing that is so nice that your brother is so lucky to have is of course, you and your mom. 00:14:24 Veronica I know a lot of people personally who came out from being incarcerated and they didn't have this community or this family that was looking out for them or even trying to support...
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