Fear Free Childbirth Podcast with Alexia Leachman

The Fear Free Childbirth podcast is for parents-to-be who want to take the fear out of pregnancy, birth and beyond. The show is a mix of real-life positive stories, experts sharing their wisdom and Alexia sharing psychology insights to help you to get into a fearless mindset. Mindset is a key aspect that can help to you have a positive experience with all three, and it all starts with preparing for pregnancy and childbirth. One of the biggest fears parents-to-be face is the fear of the unknown. This is where this show can help. By learning more about what to expect, and how to handle it, you can lose one the fear and embrace the journey. It all started when Alexia experienced her first miscarriage and felt relief; she knew something was amiss. She had tokophobia, the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth, which is pretty terrifying. To help her cope with her pregnancy and the thought of the birth, Alexia developed a technique to get rid of her fears and anxieties. She went on to have two amazing births and she now teaches this technique to others that they too can overcome their fears and have the life they want. What started as a maternity leave project, is now an essential resource with tens of thousands now listening to Alexia’s podcast each month as they seek to lose The Fear and prepare for pregnancy, birth and motherhood. The podcast is credited with helping thousands of women around the world in having a positive birth experience. A empowered birth experience is the best way to start the parenting journey because it infuses you with strength and resilience. Alexia is the developer of the healing modality Head Trash Clearance, a coach, speaker, trainer and author of the books “Fearless Birthing: Clear your fears for a positive birth” and “Clear Your Head Trash: How to create clarity, peace and confidence in your life and work”. She works privately with people from all over the world, as well as supporting them with her online products and programs. Fear Free Childbirth is the online destination for women seeking to take the fear out of pregnancy and birth with fear-clearance meditations, online fear-clearance courses, professional training and specialist programs for overcoming tokophobia. Find out more at FearFreeChildbirth.com

Erin’s Tokophobia Healing Journey 03/06/2024

Erin’s Tokophobia Healing Journey I'm thrilled to share with you another incredible tokophobia healing journey. As the host of the Fear Free Childbirth podcast, I have had the profound privilege of connecting with many incredible women, each on her unique path to overcoming the fears and anxieties that accompany pregnancy and childbirth. Today, I want to share with you one of the most touching and inspiring stories to grace my podcast – the profound journey of Erin, a woman who bravely faced her tokophobia and emerged with newfound confidence and strength. Tokophobia, an intense fear of childbirth, is more common than many realise, and it can take an immense toll on a woman’s life. Erin's story began with the paralysing terror she felt at the thought of childbirth. This fear was so strong that it extended to an aversion to even being around pregnant women. But Erin’s resolve to conquer this fear has transformed her life in ways neither of us could have imagined when we first embarked on this journey together. Erin's Tokophobia Healing Journey In this very special episode about Erin's tokophobia healing journey, we delve deep into the layers of fear and anxiety that are all too familiar for many women. Erin first got in touch with me just under a year ago, having read my book. She had tried to tackle her fears herself, but realised that she needed a bit more support to make the kind of progress she was hoping for. It was then that she decided to sign up for my This 5-week program kick-started her healing journey. Erin later joined one of my Tokophobia Healing Groups - a 5-week group program - and then she also joined my membership, the to help to keep her accountable for the final aspects of her healing journey. Where Erin's Fear Came From Erin has always regarded pregnancy with a mix of anticipation and trepidation. While the state of being pregnant seemed manageable — a sentiment echoed by her circle of friends — it was the prospect of childbirth that filled her with dread. Erin's fear of birth took root early in her life, stemming from a pivotal moment that etched itself into her memory, when at the tender age of eleven, Erin was in the delivery room when her stepmother gave birth. That intense experience left an indelible impression, leading to her often-repeated resolve: "Hell no." That mantra encapsulated Erin's feelings towards the daunting and raw reality of giving birth, even if the journey leading up to that point seemed far less intimidating. Erin's Tokophobia Healing Journey - How it Unfolded Erin's tokophobia healing journey was far from linear; it was a winding path filled with bumps and setbacks, as well as triumphs and insights. During our conversation, we discussed the heavy emotional burdens of trauma and its formidable impact on Erin’s personal growth. We also talked about how Erin's intuition blossomed throughout this process – it was as though she was rediscovering her inner compass, which had been stifled by fear for so long. This new connection with her intuition rippled out, improving her relationships at work and home, fostering compassion and better communication. Our conversation then flowed into the importance of compassion and forgiveness, not just in our personal lives, but how we can bring this transformative power into our workplaces as well. We mused on how personal transformation can catalyse profound shifts, creating ripples that improve our entire ecosystem of relationships, including those at work. Erin's Friends & Family Noticed the Changes Erin's closest ones, from her husband to her mother, have seen the changes in her. Her coworkers have felt the difference, remarking on her enhanced relational skills at the workplace. But the most significant change has been within Erin herself, especially about her perception of pregnancy and childbirth. Once a crippling fear, it’s now something she acknowledges but feels positive and equipped to handle, even planning a home birth while preparing herself to face any potential fears regarding hospitals. We also retraced Erin's steps to becoming pregnant — the initial wave of panic, followed by a dawning joy as she shared the news with her family and friends. Her journey traversed not just the physical realm but also the profound psychological and spiritual domains, contending with the responsibility and uncertainty that arrives with bringing a new life into the world. Resources That Helped Erin on her Healing Journey Through therapy, meditation, and reading literature by luminaries like Gabriel Mate, Erin has worked tirelessly to clear her layered traumas. This has included navigating generational traumas and learning not to identify herself by them. As she worked through them, she found herself embracing practices she once considered "woo woo" – a testament to the expansive nature of true healing. Erin’s journey, which took less than a year, has been nothing short of miraculous. It serves as a beacon of hope for all those who may still be struggling. For the listeners out there contending with tokophobia or any form of fear surrounding childbirth, Erin’s story exemplifies that healing is possible, and confronting our deepest fears can lead to a life of freedom and joy. Whether you're dealing with tokophobia like Erin, or any other fear related to childbirth, remember that it’s never too late to start your journey to healing. And as always, I encourage you all to explore the resources available here at fearfreechildbirth.com, where support and guidance await you. Until then, breathe deep, trust in your strength, and let the transformation unfold. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/30152793

Overcoming Birth Trauma: Heather's Journey Positive Birth 12/14/2023

Overcoming Birth Trauma: Heather's Journey Positive Birth In today's episode, I am joined by Heather to dive into her incredible journey from a fear-filled first birth to two positive and empowering experiences. Heather shares her deep emotional work in overcoming the negative feelings from her traumatic first birth and the steps she took to prepare herself mentally and emotionally for her second pregnancy. From therapy to Emotion Code, to Head Trash Clearance and hypnobirthing, Heather explores the various tools she used to transform her mindset and approach childbirth with a newfound sense of confidence. Here are some of the things we talked about; Traumatic First Birth Experience: Heather opens up about her initial birth experience, which left her feeling fearful and exhausted. She realised that her emotional baggage and negative energy had a significant impact on her birth. This realisation became the catalyst for her transformative journey towards healing and empowerment. Emotional Work and Preparation for Second Birth: Heather undertook various methods to prepare for her second birth, including therapy, Emotion Code, Head Trash Clearance, and hypnobirthing. By clearing trapped emotions and healing herself emotionally, she was able to let go of fear and create a positive birthing environment. Tuning In and Connecting with Herself: Throughout her pregnancy, Heather focused on self-care and cultivating her feminine energy. She discovered the power of connecting with her body through movements such as birth dance, a Middle Eastern practice that strengthens muscles and centres the mind. This allowed her to embrace her pregnancy and tap into her innate strength as a woman. Mindset Shift and Empowering Second Birth: Heather's mindset shift played a crucial role in her second birth experience. She approached the process with confidence, uninhibited by fear, and embraced the sensations as a natural part of birth. She utilised the tools she had acquired and received invaluable support from her doula, ultimately delivering her baby in a positive and empowering way. Postpartum Support and Integration: Heather talks about the importance of postpartum support and she recognised that her healing journey continued beyond the birth. With the love and guidance of her husband and parents, she navigated the chaotic postpartum period, and was able to balance it along with moving house and doing renovations. Through out all this, she realised she wanted to help to empower women and helping them realise the beauty and potential of birth, just as she had experienced. Heather's inspiring journey is a wonderful tale that shows us quite plainly that with the right tools, support, and a positive mindset, it is possible to have a birth experience that is both beautiful and empowering. Tune in to this episode and discover the techniques and mindset shifts that enabled Heather to go from a place of trauma and fear to being able to embrace the journey of birth with strength and empowerment. Birth has the potential to be a transformative and life-changing experience, and by preparing emotionally and mentally, you can create the empowering birth experience you want. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/29054353

Celeste's Journey from Tokophobia to Inner Peace 12/07/2023

Periods & Pregnancy: Learning to love your cycle 11/30/2023

Periods & Pregnancy: Learning to love your cycle In today's episode, I have a thought-provoking conversation with Elizabeth Tidwell, a menstrual cycle coach, as she shares her journey of healing and embracing the power of her menstrual cycle. I wanted to talk about periods because even though they're not front and centre of the pregnancy and birth experience - they are! We obsess over when they stop - are we pregnant??? - and then we obsess over when they start again. They are a HUGE part of this. And, more importantly, I wanted to talk about them because I don't think that we appreciate our periods much. There's lots of negativity around them and so I wanted to flip the script and help you to LOVE your period and tap into their power. Here are some of the things you can hear as part of this conversation; Resolving Childhood Trauma: Elizabeth opens up about her personal experience with childhood trauma and how it impacted her menstrual cycle. Through healing this trauma, she discovered that it had a profound effect not only on her cycle but on various aspects of her life. Elizabeth believes that addressing trauma is crucial to breaking free from negative cycles and embracing our menstrual cycles as sources of strength and wisdom. Menarche Kits and Breaking the Cycle of Shame: I love that Elizabeth has created menarche kits and and creates resources for us to discuss periods with openly. Elizabeth emphasises the importance of releasing the shame and trauma surrounding puberty for the next generation. By providing education and support during this transformative phase, we can set the foundation for young girls to navigate their menstrual cycles with confidence and self-acceptance. The Connection Between the Lunar Cycle and Menstrual Cycle: Is this a myth? Maybe. We discuss the connection between the lunar cycle and the menstrual cycle. While there are different viewpoints on this connection, Elizabeth points out that light-sensitive hormones might have caused women to sync up with the moon cycle in the past. However, modern lifestyles with artificial light can disrupt hormonal rhythms. Despite the scientific explanation, Elizabeth emphasises the energetic significance of aligning with the moon cycle, giving it a sense of specialness. Understanding Menstrual Cycle Awareness: Elizabeth talks us through the concept of menstrual cycle awareness, which involves being conscious of the different phases of our cycle and how they impact our daily experiences. I struggle with this big time! Hormonal fluctuations throughout the cycle lead to varying emotions and reactions. Understanding this awareness can enhance communication, help avoid conflicts, and enable us to have a better understanding of our bodies. And for those entering perimenopause - very interesting! Healing Trauma and Its Impact on Menstrual Health: Trauma, whether big or small, can have a profound impact on our menstrual cycles. Elizabeth tells us how trauma can manifest in fears and phobias related to pregnancy and birth, body image issues, and fears of losing control. By healing from trauma, we can potentially resolve related physical and emotional issues, leading to a better relationship with our bodies and our cycles. Fertility Awareness and Birth Control: Elizabeth shares insights into fertility awareness and birth control. She suggests considering fertility biomarkers rather than relying solely on apps and algorithms. We know that stress and cortisol levels can impact fertility, so stressing about trying to conceive is probably going to hinder fertility. This is why she emphasises the importance of self-care during menstruation so that we can shift our we feel and honour our bodies. I hope that listening to Elizabeth as she takes us on her transformative journey of embracing and loving her menstrual cycle can help you to learn to LOVE your periods. By addressing trauma, understanding our cycles, and cultivating self-awareness, we can unlock the immense power and wisdom that our bodies hold, and help our daughters to do the same. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28773018

Solo Parenting: Steph's Choice 11/23/2023

Solo Parenting: Steph's Choice In this episode, we dive into a powerful and inspiring conversation with my guest, Steph Bennet, as she shares her experience of choosing to solo parent. Steph's story is a testament to the strength and resilience of women who navigate both career success and motherhood on their own terms. Join us as we explore the challenges, triumphs, and joys of Steph's unique journey into motherhood. Steph made the decision to prioritise a career that allowed her to have control over her work without judgment. She is a strong advocate for not compromising but optimising her life to create a balanced and fear-free environment for herself and her daughter. As a managing director, Steph initially faced challenges in balancing work and parenting, but she gradually found strategies to create flexibility and adapt to hybrid and flexible working arrangements. Her story highlights the ongoing need for better support and understanding in the workplace for working mothers. Here are some of the things we chatted about... 1. The Challenges of Being a Solo Parent: Steph's journey began with a clear vision of becoming a mother, even if she couldn't find a partner. She discusses her decision to explore single parenthood and the concerns she had about the physical and emotional aspects of raising a child on her own. 2. Choosing the Path of Insemination: Steph underwent tests at a fertility clinic and discovered that IVF was not suitable for her. She decided to pursue IUI, or intrauterine insemination, as an alternative. She shares her experience of choosing a sperm donor from an online catalog based on various factors, including health information and personality traits. 3. Balancing Work and Motherhood: Steph candidly discusses the challenges and rewards of being a working mother. She emphasises the importance of setting boundaries and not overworking, while also acknowledging the lack of respect and flexibility that many working parents face in the workplace. 4. French vs. British Parenting Styles: Steph and I compare parenting styles in France and the UK. They explore the benefits of allowing children to be independent and figure things out on their own, as well as the challenges of French school holidays for working parents. 5. The Journey of Conscious Parenting: Steph highlights the importance of allowing children to make their own decisions and learn from their own mistakes. She shares her desire to give her daughter the freedom to choose her own interests and create her own path in life. Steph candidly addresses these key questions shaping her solo parenting journey: How did Steph's previous health concerns and epilepsy diagnosis affect her decision to become a solo parent? In what ways did Steph's career choice allow her to have more control over her work and spend more time with her daughter? Steph mentions the importance of not compromising but optimising her life. How does this mindset play a role in her journey as a solo parent? How does the support and childcare system in France compare to that in the UK, and what impact does it have on working mothers? What are some organisations and campaigns that are working towards supporting working moms in the workplace, and what more needs to be done? How has the COVID-19 pandemic affected the experiences of pregnant women and new mothers, especially those who are solo parenting? What are some of the challenges Steph faced as a solo parent, and how did she navigate them? How did she find support and emotional connection during the early stages of parenting? Steph discusses the importance of allowing children to be independent and make their own decisions. How can parents balance setting boundaries with fostering independence in their children? Steph mentions her new podcast, "For the Love of Kids." How does her experience as a solo parent influence the topics and themes covered in her podcast? Steph's journey from considering adoption to choosing IUI as a solo parent is unique. How did she approach the process of selecting a sperm donor, and how did she envision her daughter's future relationship with her donor father? Steph's story of choosing to solo parent is an incredible testament to the power of following one's dreams and embracing the possibilities of motherhood. Her journey highlights the need for increased support for working mothers in the workplace and challenges conventional norms surrounding parenting and work-life balance. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28771773

Transforming Birth Culture: Resolving Conflict in the Birth Space for Improved Maternity Care 11/16/2023

Transforming Birth Culture: Resolving Conflict in the Birth Space for Improved Maternity Care Birth is a profound and transformative experience, but unfortunately, conflicts and disagreements within the birth space can sometimes overshadow the joy and empowerment that should be at the forefront. In this episode of the Fear Free Childbirth podcast, Jenny Koslow, a perinatal educator with four decades of experience, sheds light on the issues of conflict and tension within the birth world. Understanding the Birth Space: Jenny begins by sharing her wealth of knowledge and stories gathered from birth workers around the globe. She highlights the conflicting views and struggles that exist between different professions within the birth world, such as midwives, lactation consultants, and doulas. These conflicts often arise from differing ideologies stemming from the biomedical and naturalistic sides of childbirth. From home births to highly medicalized hospital births, the spectrum of choices and opinions can be quite divisive. The Influence of Birth Settings: The conversation then delves into the impact of various birth settings. Jenny discusses how midwives typically handle vaginal births with minimal intervention, but the c-section rates in private clinics in many countries are unacceptably high. Public hospitals, where most people give birth, often face issues with support and the need for less judgment towards healthcare providers working in these systems. There is also a sense of resentment among professionals like midwives, obstetrical nurses, and doulas, especially in countries like Spain and other Latin American nations. Examining the Roles of Birth Workers: Jenny addresses the challenges within the doula movement, including the need for more professional training and regulation. While doulas carry immense emotional weight, they may not bear the same level of medical responsibility as healthcare providers. This discrepancy, coupled with differences in income and work dynamics, can sometimes lead to tension and dissatisfaction among birth workers. Finding Common Ground: Despite these conflicts, Jenny emphasises the importance of recognising the positive work being done by individuals in the system and avoiding generalisations. She highlights positive initiatives in different countries, demonstrating that change can come from a combination of different approaches rather than extreme views. The conversation explores the crucial need for effective communication, formation of personal relationships, and acknowledgement of the contributions made by individuals across the birth spectrum. Promoting Unity in the Birth Space: Positive changes often stem from top-down leadership but acknowledges that frontline caregivers need more support. The conversation explores the imbalances in authority, challenges faced by professionals within institutionalized childbirth, and the importance of respect and recognition. The episode also delves into the role of birth education, the impact of the internet on preparation, and the different priorities individuals have when it comes to their birthing experience. Jenny tackles these burning questions: How does conflict in the birth space impact the overall birthing experience for families? What are some common sources of conflict between different professions in the birth world, such as midwives, lactation consultants, and doulas? How do different birth settings, like private clinics, public hospitals, birthing centers, and home births, contribute to the conflict in the birth world? What are some potential solutions to reduce the conflict between birth professionals and improve collaboration in maternity healthcare? What role does fear play in creating conflict and backlash in the birth space? How can fear be addressed and alleviated to create a more positive birth experience? How can authorities and decision-makers in the birth industry support birth professionals and foster unity and respect among different roles? What are some potential drawbacks of the current doula movement, and how can it be improved and regulated to create a more professional environment? What can be done to bridge the gap in understanding and respect between birth professionals in the biomedical and naturalistic sides of the birth world? How can birth education and prenatal classes be improved to better prepare couples for childbirth and empower them to advocate for their own values and desires? What steps can individuals in the birth industry take to address judgment, shame, and guilt among birth workers, and promote empathy, respect, and professional ethics? By exploring the perspectives of various birth professionals and delving into the need for unity, better training, and improved communication, this episode serves as a catalyst for positive change in the pregnancy and birth industry. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28637443

How Puberty Trauma Shapeshifts into Fear of Pregnancy and Body Image 11/02/2023

How Puberty Trauma Shapeshifts into Fear of Pregnancy and Body Image Today's episode is a deeply insightful conversation between Alexia and a previous guest, Ramona who recently shared her story of overcoming tokophobia. They share personal experiences and explore the connection between puberty trauma, body dysmorphia, and the fear of pregnancy and childbirth, known as tokophobia. In this thought-provoking episode, we delve into our own experiences during puberty, our struggles with body image, and the impact it has on our adulthood, especially as they transition from maiden to mother. Here are some of the things we touched on during this conversation; 1. Personal Growth and Mental Health Insights: Ramona shares her path to becoming a therapist, which opened her eyes to mental illnesses and disorders. She noticed patterns in her own behaviours and those of their family members, leading to a realisation about her body image and weight-related issues. 2. Perception of Body Image and Weight: Society's compliments women on their appearance and weight which reinforces the belief that they are doing well, despite engaging in disordered eating. 3. Overcoming Tokophobia: Ramona shares her struggles with tokophobia and how body image and body dysmorphia played a pivotal role. She sheds light on her journey to develop a healthier relationship with food and her body, seeking therapy and support from professionals to tackle the underlying narratives and beliefs. 4. Embracing Change: The fear of becoming pregnant and the associated changes in body and life were prominent concerns for Ramona. She reflects on her initial negative outlook and the gradual realisation that these changes were manageable and even beautiful. 5. Puberty Trauma and Tokophobia: Alexia and Ramona explore the connection between puberty trauma and tokophobia, particularly how experiences during puberty can shape a woman's perception of pregnancy and childbirth. They acknowledge the fear of losing control and feeling trapped within the process, which can lead to anxiety and fear. This episode of Fear Free Childbirth pushes the boundaries of exploration, and I invite you my listeners to reflect on your own puberty journeys and how they may affect your adult lives, including the transition to motherhood. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28473458

From Phobia to Calling: From Fearful Mama to Confident Midwife 10/26/2023

From Phobia to Calling: From Fearful Mama to Confident Midwife In this episode, I have an incredible story of transformation to share with you. My guest, Jessica, was once plagued with fear when it came to pregnancy and childbirth. However, she conquered her fears and had a positive birth experience that inspired her to make a bold career change. Jessica talks about her journey from fear to becoming a midwife. It's a remarkable turnaround that showcases the power of overcoming our deepest fears and embracing new paths in life. But before we delve into Jessica's inspiring story, I want to share with you a tale that highlights what can happen if we leave our pregnancy and birth fears unchecked. Learn about the fears commonly faced by women during pregnancy, birth, and even those struggling with tokophobia. While some may assume these fears revolve around pain and tearing, they often stem from deeper conflicts and anxieties. These fears include the fear of losing control, feeling trapped or lacking choices, making the wrong decisions, and feeling weak or vulnerable. These fears are not exclusive to pregnancy and birth. They can manifest in various areas of our lives, such as feeling out of control at home or work, or even a loss of control over our own bodies. It's crucial to recognise and address these fears because they tend to permeate other aspects of our lives, affecting our overall well-being and hindering our personal growth. To illustrate this point, I recount a powerful story of a radio show presenter who, like me, experienced tokophobia. Following the loss of her baby and her subsequent aversion to getting pregnant again, she discovered that this fear had affected multiple areas of her life without her realising it. Once she identified and faced her fear head-on, she realised how it had suppressed her ability to birth anything significant in her business and personal development. The transformation she experienced after releasing this fear was nothing short of astounding. So, if you're currently grappling with fears surrounding pregnancy, birth, or any other areas in life, listen closely to Jessica's remarkable journey. Her story is a testament to the incredible power we possess within ourselves to rewrite our narratives and conquer our deepest fears. Get ready to be inspired, empowered, and discover a fearless mindset with Fear Free Childbirth. In this episode, we delved into a wide array of thought-provoking questions with Jessica: Have you ever experienced any fears related to pregnancy or birth? How did you handle them? How do you think fears about pregnancy and birth can impact other aspects of a person's life? Can you think of any examples? Have you ever witnessed someone close to you struggling with fears around childbirth? How did they cope with it? Do you think understanding the root cause of a fear can help in overcoming it? Why or why not? Have you ever been inspired to make a major career change due to a life-changing event? How do you think conquering a fear can lead to personal transformation? Do you think this fear is universal? How might it manifest in different areas of life? How do you think societal expectations and judgments contribute to fears around pregnancy and birth? Do you think addressing past traumas is essential in overcoming fears? What steps do you think can be taken to raise awareness and provide support for individuals facing fears related to childbirth? /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28418111

Conversations with Spirit Babies 10/19/2023

Measuring Healing Progress in Pregnancy and Birth 10/12/2023

Measuring Healing Progress in Pregnancy and Birth Welcome back to Fear Free Childbirth! In today's episode, I want to delve into the fascinating concept of the Map of Consciousness. Have you ever invested time and energy into courses, therapy or retreats to bring about a change in how you feel, only to wonder if they're really making a difference? We all have, right? Today, I want share a powerful tool that you can use to measure the effectiveness of these activities in overcoming fear, anxiety, and finding calm and peace. Once I discovered this method of measuring healing progress I decided to revisit my own healing journey around overcoming tokophobia, and my pregnancy fears and anxieties; I wanted to see what it would tell me. And it's fascinating! In today's episode, we'll explore the concept of consciousness and how understanding your own state of mind can give you clues as to where you are on your healing journey. So, let's dive in and learn how to measure the effectiveness of our healing work or therapeutic methods, and ultimately, achieve fear-free childbirth. In this insightful podcast episode, I want to help you to embark on a journey of self-discovery and healing as we explore a series of thought-provoking questions; How do you personally measure the effectiveness of your healing work or therapeutic practices? Have you ever experienced a significant shift in your level of consciousness? If so, what factors do you believe contributed to that shift? Do you think it's important to have a tool or method to track progress in overcoming fears and anxieties? How do you distinguish between temporary feelings of happiness and true progress in your healing journey? Have you ever felt trapped in repeating negative patterns or self-destructive behaviours? How did you break free from them? What role do you think self-awareness plays in the healing journey? How has it impacted your own progress? How do you perceive the relationship between your level of consciousness and your emotional well-being? Are there any specific life events or experiences that have significantly impacted your personal growth and healing journey? These questions will guide our exploration into the realms of personal transformation, self-awareness, and the various tools and experiences that contribute to our individual healing journeys. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28212134

Gen Z Anxiety and the Decision to Start a Family 10/05/2023

From Fearful to Surrogate: Susie's Story 09/21/2023

From Fearful to Surrogate: Susie's Story In today's episode, I am joined by the incredible Susie Hamilton as she shares her spine-tingling story of transformation from someone who wrestled with tokophobia, the fear of pregnancy and birth, to becoming a surrogate. When Susie discovered this podcast when she was preparing for pregnancy, she went on to use my fear clearance method to clear her fears of pregnancy and birth. This lead to an incredible transformation in her. Not only did she have two wonderful births of her own children, but she has since embarked on the surrogacy journey, and she is currently pregnant with her second surrogate baby. Susie's story exemplifies the activation of inner power, self-advocacy, and the incredible impact that facing fears can have not only during childbirth but also in other aspects of life. As we delve into her experiences, we will explore the importance of feeling comfortable, making informed decisions, advocating for oneself, and embracing the journey with all its emotions. Overcoming Fear: Susie's Transformation from Anxiety to Empowerment Pregnancy and childbirth can be daunting experiences, filled with fears and anxieties. But what if there was a way to transform that fear into empowerment? In this episode of the Fear Free Childbirth Podcast, Susie's story is a testament to the power of overcoming fear and finding strength in vulnerability. Let us dive into Susie's journey and explore the lessons we can learn from her transformation. Embracing the Fear: Susie's journey starts with her admission of being terrified of pregnancy and childbirth. Like many expectant mothers, she found solace in the Fear Free Childbirth Podcast. Through the fear clearance method that I openly share, Susie learned to confront and release her fears, allowing her to embark on a path of radical transformation. Activating Inner Power: Susie's story highlights the activation of inner power and self-advocacy in the birth context. She shares her belief in fully experiencing the moment, embracing all emotions and adrenaline that come with it. While some may prefer to be fully clothed during birth, Susie felt comfortable being naked, emphasising the importance of feeling safe and secure during such a vulnerable time. The Journey into Surrogacy: Susie's positive birth experiences inspired her to explore surrogacy, so that she could to capture the empowering feeling of pregnancy without bringing another baby home. Despite her initial uncertainties, Susie embraced the opportunity when she met the qualifications and embarked on her incredible journey as a surrogate parent. Self-Advocacy and Empowerment During Birth: One message that's clear throughout this episode is the importance of advocating for yourself during labour and delivery. From questioning the necessity of certain medical procedures to choosing different positions for labour. Susie shares how she fearlessly asserted her right to make decisions about her own body and the birth. Her experiences are a useful reminder that assertiveness and comfort are essential for a positive birth experience. Building a Supportive Community: Susie's transformation was not just personal; she also found strength and support through the Fear Free Childbirth community and by starting her own Instagram account. By connecting with others who shared similar fears, Susie was able to overcome feelings of guilt and ungratefulness for desiring a peaceful pregnancy and birth. The power of community and the ability to create lifelong connections through shared experiences can really help you on this journey to motherhood, no matter what that looks like for you. Susie's tear-jerking story from fear to empowerment is a remarkable testament to the transformative power of embracing vulnerability and confronting your deepest fears. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/28063032

Emetophobia, Fear of Vomit and Pregnancy 09/14/2023

When Postnatal meets Perimenopause, with Linda Stephens 09/07/2023

When Postnatal meets Perimenopause, with Linda Stephens In today's episode, we dive deep into the fascinating world of perimenopause and how it intersects with the postnatal period. With so many women waiting until later in life to have children, this is an important topic for women to get their heads around. To help us do that, I am joined by my guest, Linda Stephens, who brings her expertise and insights on women's health to help you navigate this transitional stage in your life. We explore the hormonal changes, physical symptoms, and emotional challenges that can arise during this time. Together, we discover how understanding and nurturing our bodies can lead to a graceful transition and a renewed sense of self. Some of the key questions we explore include: 1. What are some common symptoms experienced by women during the perimenopause stage? How do these symptoms compare to those experienced after childbirth? 2. How can understanding the natural hormonal cycle of women help them navigate their energy levels and productivity throughout the month? 3. How can create a more supportive and accommodating environment for women during the perimenopause transition? 4. How can taking care of the adrenal glands help support hormonal balance during the perimenopause stage? 5. Why there is a lack of awareness and knowledge about this treatment option among healthcare professionals? 6. What are some techniques or practices mentioned in the episode that can help shift the body into a parasympathetic state and support adrenal care? 7. How can we prioritise good fats, fiber, and quality carbohydrates in our diet to support our hormones? 8. How societal expectations and pressures impact women's approach to exercise during this stage of life? 9. Why it is important for women to educate themselves about the changes they will experience during the late 30s to post-menopause stage? 10. How can women embrace the "wise woman" phase and let go of societal pressures to stay young and slim? What steps can we take to promote positive self-acceptance and embrace the changes in our bodies during this stage of life? /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/27933795

Your Hidden Pregnancy & Birth Traumas 09/07/2023

How Drumming Enhances Pregnancy and Birth Experiences 08/31/2023

How Drumming Enhances Pregnancy and Birth Experiences Welcome to another episode of Fear Free Childbirth podcast, where we delve into the incredible realm of childbirth and explore unconventional yet empowering practices. In this episode, I am joined by special guest Sophie Messager, a doula who has integrated drumming into her work with expecting mothers. Together, we explore the profound effects of drumming during pregnancy and birth, while highlighting the lost wisdom of traditional women's practices. We touch upon several thought-provoking topics and intriguing questions related to drumming for pregnancy and birth. 1. Uncovering the Healing Power: Sophie emphasises the importance of healing oneself before guiding others on their journey. By attuning to their own energetic patterns and addressing any emotional blocks, practitioners can hold space more effectively and transmit the transformational power of their method. 2. Training and Specialisation: Our discussion sheds light on the availability of training options for practitioners interested in incorporating drumming into their work. From practitioner and professional levels to specialised training for pregnancy and birth, individuals can explore these avenues to deepen their understanding and skills. 3. Science Meets Tradition: Our conversation touches upon the scientific validation of non-scientific practices like Reiki and the need to bridge traditional wisdom with modern science, bringing together the best of both worlds. This holistic approach offers a comprehensive understanding of the profound effects drumming can have on the mind, body, and spirit. Some of the key questions we explore include: How does the use of drumming in pregnancy and birth align with traditional women's wisdom and cultural practices? In what ways can drumming support women in feeling empowered and relaxed during childbirth? How can drumming be adapted to meet the needs and preferences of each individual woman? How could Sophie’s book contribute to the existing literature on childbirth practices? How does drumming affect the brain and fascias, and what other potential benefits might it have for the body? How can holistic approaches, like drumming, contribute to this healing process? How can we promote a more positive and empowering perspective on menopause in our communities? How could drumming positively impact young girls' experiences of developing womanhood? How can we advocate for a more holistic approach to health, especially in the context of childbirth? Is there a correlation between drumming and labour induction? How might we further explore this connection? This episode takes us on a captivating journey into the ancient wisdom of drumming and its transformative power during pregnancy and birth. We shed light on the forgotten practices of women's wisdom, emphasising the significance of creating safe and supportive spaces for birthing individuals. As we explore the profound connection between science and tradition, may we embrace the healing potential of drumming and empower expecting mothers to embark on their birth journeys fearlessly. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/27879243

Conquering Tokophobia & Body Dysmorphia: Ramona's Story 08/24/2023

Conquering Tokophobia & Body Dysmorphia: Ramona's Story In this week's episode, Alexia chats to Ramona, who shares her powerful story of triumphing over tokophobia and body dysmorphia to embrace and enjoy pregnancy. Throughout our conversation, Ramona imparts wisdom on communicating with healthcare providers, finding the right support, and illuminating challenging experiences. She candidly shares her transformation from body dysmorphia to embracing pregnancy joyfully, revealing how her perspective changed with the help of a personal trainer and a comprehensive program of healing and self-care. Ramona's journey traces a path to acceptance and empowerment, from initial anxiety about her pregnancy to a resolute decision to embrace it. We explore how her past experiences parallel her approach to pregnancy and childbirth, as she confronts longstanding fears and anxieties head-on. Here are just some of the questions we explore in this episode How did Ramona's initial doubts about the effectiveness of mantras change over time? Did her open-mindedness play a role in their transformation? What were some of her previous attempts to improve her sleep and why did she find the mantras to be more effective? In what ways did her trauma therapy, combined with the use of mantras, contribute to her transformative journey? How does she experience with CBT for anxiety disorders and phobias compare to their belief in the need for body therapy to rewire the brain and body's response to fear? What are some additional therapies that she recommends for addressing phobias and anxiety disorders, and why does she find them effective? What steps did she take to prepare for childbirth and ensure a positive experience despite her tokophobia? Why does she emphasise the importance of talking to someone about fears and traumatic experiences, and what role does validation and support play in this process? How can societal expectations around pregnancy and parenthood contribute to feelings of loneliness and isolation What strategies did she suggest to overcome these challenges? How did her work with a therapist and personal trainer impact her body image and relationship with her own body during pregnancy? Reflecting on her journey, what role did research, online communities, and exposure to positive birth stories have in her transformation and acceptance of pregnancy? /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/27728367

Anxiety in Pregnancy 08/17/2023

Anxiety in Pregnancy In this episode of Fear Free Childbirth, I delve into the topic of anxiety and how it affects pregnancy. As someone who has personally experienced anxiety during my own pregnancy journey, I understand the importance of addressing and overcoming these fears and anxieties. Fear and control are significant themes in anxiety and tokophobia, which can intensify during pregnancy due to the numerous unknowns and changes that occur. The fear of uncertainty and the feeling of things spiralling out of control can be overwhelming. I discuss how this fear primarily exists in our minds, until a real threat is encountered. During labour, fear can arise if things are not going well, while anxiety is present before that point. Our fear radar can be influenced by society's fear messaging, making it challenging to distinguish between real threats and imagined ones. The past few years have been filled with fear messaging, but not all of it has been based on reality. In addition to the fear of pregnancy and birth, I explore how fears and anxieties can manifest in other aspects of life, such as health, relationships, parenting, work, and our professional life. I explain how patterns of conflict around control and letting go can impact multiple areas of life, and how addressing and healing these conflicts can lead to positive ripple effects. I also share my personal journey of overcoming fear of judgment and fear of losing social connections, which can cause hesitation in having children. I explore how fear of judgment and indecision can lead to procrastination in various areas of life, resulting in poor sleep quality and increased tiredness during the day. So, if you're experiencing anxiety during your pregnancy journey or simply want to understand and overcome fear in different aspects of your life, this episode is a must-listen. Here are some of the questions that I explore in this episode: How does the fear of uncertainty and change impact anxiety during pregnancy? What are some common fears and anxieties that women experience during pregnancy and childbirth? How does fear messaging from society affect our ability to distinguish between real threats and imagined ones? What role does fear of judgment play in anxiety around pregnancy and parenthood? How can conflicts around control and letting go impact various aspects of life, including pregnancy and childbirth? How does anxiety and fear of judgment affect decision-making and procrastination in other areas of life? What are some strategies or resources that can help women overcome fears and anxieties surrounding pregnancy and birth? What are some potential consequences of prolonged anxiety and fear during pregnancy, such as poor sleep quality and reliance on stimulants for energy? How can tokophobia, the fear of pregnancy and childbirth, impact a woman's journey and choices during pregnancy What can be done to increase awareness and understanding of tokophobia, and support women who are experiencing it during pregnancy? /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/27727086

Ethnicity Scans and Black Bodied Maternal Health, with Mars Lord 08/10/2023

Ethnicity Scans and Black Bodied Maternal Health, with Mars Lord In this episode I'm am joined by the incredible Mars Lord, doula and activist dedicated to improving the birthing experiences of black and brown-bodied women. In this episode, Mars will shine a light on a pressing issue: ethnicity scans. We'll delve into the controversy surrounding these scans, their potential risks and benefits, and the systemic racism that underlies their implementation. We dive deep into the challenges faced by black and brown-bodied women within the healthcare system and explore ways to navigate these hurdles and ensure a fear-free childbirth. Here are some key questions that we explore during our conversation: 1. How does systemic racism contribute to poor healthcare outcomes for black and brown-bodied people, specifically during the perinatal period? 2. What are some specific examples of discrimination and mistreatment experienced by black and brown-bodied pregnant women within the healthcare system? 3. How does chronic stress and anxiety, along with systemic issues, contribute to the high rates of maternal mortality among black and brown women? 4. What are some potential solutions for improving the birthing experiences and healthcare outcomes for black and brown-bodied women? 5. How can healthcare providers be better equipped to address the specific healthcare needs and concerns of black and brown-bodied women? 6. What role does self-advocacy play in navigating the healthcare system as a black or brown-bodied pregnant woman? 7. How can education and awareness surrounding ethnicity scans be increased to empower black and brown-bodied women to make informed decisions about their care? 8. How can the healthcare system shift its focus from technology-centred care to women-centred and evidence-based care? 9. What steps can be taken to ensure that the voices and experiences of black and brown-bodied women are listened to and heard within the healthcare system? 10. In what ways can the healthcare system address and dismantle systemic racism in order to provide equitable and quality care for all women, regardless of their ethnicity? /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/27690759

Overcoming Tokophobia: Heather's story 07/27/2023

How to have a fear free childbirth 07/20/2023

How partners can support women during pregnancy & birth 08/22/2022

How partners can support women during pregnancy & birth The one idea that inspired and motivated me when I started working in the birth and pregnancy space was this: the birth moment is a sacred one that has ripple effect that impacts so many people. The moment of birth creates a ripple that affects many Birth doesn't just affect the mother and the baby being born, it affects the father and/or the mother's partner too. And it affects the professionals present; the midwives, the doctors or OB-GYNs, the consultants, the doulas, and the nurses. But it doesn't stop there. Depending on how the birth goes, it will will also affect the baby's siblings, and other family members. Then there's the life of the baby as he or she grows up. Our births create an emotional blueprint that we carry with us our whole lives. Our fears, our patterns of behaviour, our stresses and our anxieties are all rooted in our birth experience. If we experienced a traumatic birth, then this will affect in all sorts of mysterious ways as our fears and traumas play out. I say 'mysterious' because many people don't realise that they struggles they are afflicted with as adults probably have their roots in their birth experience. The WAY we are born - c-cection, vaginal birth, ventouse etc - can impact us too, as I've covered already quite a bit on the podcast. has done incredible work in this area if you're interested in finding out more. If, as a baby, we experience our birth as challenging or traumatic then as adults we might not go on to have children as our trauma creates fears or phobias in us. In my work supporting women in overcoming tokophobia, for many of my clients the trauma of their arrival in the world is often the trauma that is at the root of their phobia. The moment of birth has far-reaching consequences. And it's for this reason that I want to help people to improve the chances or that moment being as wonderful as possible. Birth is sacred You see, when you take a closer look, the moment of birth is a sacred one. But it's not simply because it affects so many. It's because it is the creation of life. It's the moment when we exist for the first time outside of our mother and it carries such potency. The first time we look into our babies eyes is a powerful moment that can stay with you forever. Those first few hours with your baby can be like nothing you've ever experienced. But sadly, these are experiences that can be missing for those whose births are difficult. When a birth experience is a difficult one, the impact of this is far-reaching and does not only affect the mother and child. The father or partner is affected, as are the professionals present. And so the ripple expands. By focusing our energy on preparing to create the space for a wonderful birth experience to take place, we are creating the possibility for lots of people to benefit in important ways from this one birth. Conscious preparation is not just for mothers-to-be But this conscious preparation is not limited to the mother-to-be, although she can often feel like it's all on her shoulders. The father or partner also needs to be part of this, and while they might know that, it might not always be immediately obvious HOW they can support the mother. If this is you - wondering how you can best support your partner as you prepare for the arrival of your baby - then this interview is a must listen. Conversation with Souvereign In this interview I chat with Souvereign who helps dads to prepare for the arrival of their baby. During this conversation Souvereign shares; how his experience of the arrival of his first child made him decide to do things differently for his second how he views birth and its sacred nature practical ways on how men can support their partners during pregnancy his experience on being asked to cut the cord made him feel his fascinating perspective on the cutting of the cord and why we need to wait as long as possible why he is a strong advocate of natural birth About Souvereign Souvereign is a well known Syntropy expert in the Regenerative Practitioner world. "For 10 years I have studied and applied Regenerative Agricultural Practices and now I am using the same principles to create Regeneration in Human Ecology. Bringing the Syntropic Ethos into the inner healing space is powerful and important because when we deal with trauma or healing of any kind, our Human Nature is always part of that equation. Doing this work myself on myself has transformed, up-levelled, and empowered me to teach, train and coach others in “Syntropic Embodiment”. I work (mostly) with women in their sunset years who are ready to go deep and do the inner cleaning that meditation or yoga never addressed. This is deep healing of early childhood wounds related to the World of Man or the patriarchy and restores a love-filled wholeness from within. As a strong voice for Lotus Birth and Natural Birthing Advocate, I teach men around the importance of Natural Birth & pregnancy practices and how they can show up even more effectively and powerfully during pregnancy and birth. I teach men simple and yet insightful ways that help them become the fathers they want to be without repeating the damage they themselves experienced being young. In that, I am a stand for the sacredness of Birth, Women’s healing with the World of Man and Trauma Transformation. I simply offer people this: Let me help you Remember your Nature. The healing, albeit transformational will be All Natural. " Souvereign can be reached at For notifications for upcoming workshops and trainings subscribe here: IG: Facebook: YouTube: youtube.com/c/ /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/24128100

The Psychology of Pain, with Dr Gary Keil 06/18/2020

The Psychology of Pain, with Dr Gary Keil Pain is interesting. At least I find it interesting. I guess that comes from my work in helping women prepare for pregnancy and birth, because pain comes up a lot! In fact it comes up too much in my opinion. More than it should do. And this is because a fear of pain is probably one of the most common pregnancy and birth fears I come across. Well, it's only to be expected, after all childbirth is the gold standard when it comes to pain. Everything is compared to childbirth. And yet in some countries, childbirth is not considered or thought of as being painful. Now THAT is interesting! This raises all sorts of questions for us around the psychology of pain especially around something like childbirth. Is childbirth painful? A lot of people make the mistake of thinking that 'childbirth is painful' as being a fact and therefore guaranteed that it will happen. Well it's not. It's not something that happens every single time. It might happen for some people but not all. In fact some people find labour enjoyable or euphoric. From the reading I've done over the years, it's accepted that around a quarter of women experience pain-free births. . So it's most definitely not a fact. It's simply the experience of the majority. So this does raise all sorts of questions for me around the psychology of pain. How subjective is pain? Do our beliefs around pain have an impact on us experiencing it? Can we do anything to avoid it or reduce it in some way? Do we all experience it differently? At what point does pain become suffering? Is it psychological or is it physical. Or both? Thankfully I came across the opportunity to speak to someone who specialises in pain and suffering and was able to put these questions to them on my . The psychology of pain In this podcast chat I'm joined by . Dr. Keil was originally a pharmacist but has continued his hunger for knowledge in better understanding the human condition, why we behave the way we do and how we can improve. And now he specialises in pain and suffering. "I am passionate about how the mind and body work together, and how both can be fully developed to create happier, healthier and more creative individuals. Neuroscience and neuroplasticity, philosophy/theosophy/positive psychology, and mind-body practices like yoga and meditation are my main passions but I'm a FIRM believer that what you put into your body is just as important as how the innards work." During my podcast chat Dr Keil talks about the difference between pain and suffering how pain has both emotional and physical components what we can do to reduce our experience of pain, and what is likely to increase it how our beliefs impact our experience of pain the opposite of PTSD, PTGO what we can to prevent our experience of trauma the length of time it can take to train and change our minds It's a fascinating conversation and one that I hope you enjoy. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/14721065

What's the story behind the podcast? 05/28/2020

What's the story behind the podcast? The Fear Free Childbirth and Motherhood podcast is where I help you to lose the fear, anxiety and stress that inevitably accompanies the journey to motherhood. When you listen to this podcast you can expect to listen to me and my guests as we dive into real stories, expert topics and psychology insights to inspire you and change your mindset on this the most exciting journey of your life. My name is Alexia and I’m a therapeutic coach and the author of Fearless Birthing and Clear Your Head Trash. I help people to get rid of the head trash that stands between them and the life and business they want. When I found out I was pregnant I was a business mindset coach. I didn’t know it at the time, but I had tokophobia, the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth. This forced me to get up close and personal with Fear, in a way that I hadn’t before. I was able to overcome my tokophobia during my pregnancy using a fear clearance technique that I developed. At the time, I didn’t realise that what I had achieved was a big deal; apparently you can’t overcome tokophobia. But I missed that memo! As a result of my experience I now help women to overcome tokophobia using the same approach that I used. I call this approach Fearless birthing and at its heart is the Head Trash Clearance Method, the technique that I developed and refined over both my pregnancies. So how do we reduce fear? One of life’s biggest fears is the unknown. And nowhere does this apply more than to pregnancy, birth and motherhood. One of the best ways to reduce any fears is to learn and become better informed. To help you with this I seek out interesting experts to share insights and experience on a wide range of topics around pregnancy, birth and motherhood. Now, if you still have a lot of fear after becoming better informed, then it suggests that there is some emotional and mindset work to do. This is a little bit more involved and very much depends on you. Sometimes better understanding the psychology or mindset aspects to this journey to motherhood, can be helpful in unblocking things. And so that’s what some episodes will focus on - the mindset and psychology aspects - and how they relate to the pregnancy and motherhood journey. Some people really struggle with learning about aspects of pregnancy, birth or motherhood. If that’s you, then it suggests a strong emotional component is present - in other words - a high level of fear. But sometimes, listening to enough positive content and better understanding our psychology is all that’s required to lose the fear, anxiety and stress. And so that’s what you can expect from this podcast. I hope you enjoy it! Alexia /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/14603087

Anxiety in pregnancy 11/12/2019

Anxiety in pregnancy Anxiety in pregnancy is currently estimated to affect around 15% of women. Through my work in supporting women in preparing for birth and pregnancy, anxiety is something that I see a lot and, dare I say, I think the numbers are probably higher. When women are feeling fearful around aspects of their pregnancy or birth it can trigger feelings of anxiety, but these feelings are known to fluctuate through pregnancy. Anxiety in pregnancy has been shown to peak in both the first and the third trimester (1). How anxiety in pregnancy affects birth outcomes From the evidence available (2) we know that pregnancy anxiety not only affects pregnant women’s health but also has an impact on labour outcomes. Anxiety in pregnancy can affect the likelihood of things such as preterm delivery prolonged labour caesarean birth, low birth weight When you combine these potential outcomes with those that may arise as a result of fear, it’s clear that helping women to deal with fear and anxiety in pregnancy needs to be an important focus if we’re to improve birth outcomes for women. I’ve been supporting women in overcoming their fear for many years now, particularly those with tokophobia, and I’ve enjoyed some incredible success rates. Success rates that are apparently impossible. I was once told off on Twitter by a midwife specialising in tokophobia for suggesting that it’s possible to overcome tokophobia. “… [I] shouldn’t raise women’s hopes like that because they can’t. They just end up having c-sections.”. That may well be the case, but a positive c-section birth experience that is empowering for the woman is a world apart from the c-section that the woman dreads and feels anxious and terrified throughout. That’s when I realised that I needed to get some evidence behind my . Without it, I wouldn’t be able to get birth professionals and healthcare providers to take my work seriously. And that in turn would limit the women able to benefit from the success I’m achieving reducing strong fears and anxieties. So, that’s what I set out to do. Collaborating with the University of Nottingham I joined forces with the to explore the possibility of collaborating on a research project to evaluate my . This is when I first met Dr. Megan Barnard. Dr. Barnard specialises in anxiety and so exploring anxiety in pregnancy was a good fit for her area of research. So we set out to design a study that would enable us to answer the question: can women reduce their anxieties and fears during pregnancy using a self-paced online programme? Can we reduce anxiety in pregnancy? After many iterations and submissions to the Ethics Board, we got the green light. So I’m delighted to say that there is currently a study underway which aims to evaluate the effectiveness of the in helping women to reduce their anxiety and fear during pregnancy. Given, Dr. Barnard’s expertise in anxiety, I thought it would be a great idea for us to have a conversation about anxiety in pregnancy so that we could all learn more about anxiety. But even more of a reason is this; Dr. Barnard is now currently pregnant. When we started working together, her interest in our work was purely professional. Now that she is experiencing some of the anxieties that we are researching, she has a unique insight into our project which I just wanted to ask her about. A conversation with Dr. Megan Barnard One thing that stood out for me from our conversation was that Dr. Barnard was saying that anxiety could strike anyone during pregnancy; you don’t already need to be someone who suffers from it to be affected by it during pregnancy. Dr. Barnard also explained how much pregnancy has bought about a very human reaction to her pregnancy. Even though she studies and researches anxiety - and so is very knowledgeable on it - that doesn’t mean that she isn’t succumbing to it. And I think that is something we can all learn from. We might think that we have things covered, that we ‘know’, but that doesn’t stop our emotions from wading in and causing chaos. This is why I think all women need access to tools that can help them to reduce their anxiety and fear, because it really can happen to anyone, at any point during a pregnancy. And given that anxiety peaks the first and third trimesters, it’s important to have access to this kind of support from early on during your pregnancy. This is one point that Dr Barnard makes during our conversation. Typically women sign up to ante-natal classes late in their pregnancy but in fact, Dr Barnard suggests that women seek emotional and mental support much earlier on during their pregnancy. She talks about the negative impact of having the anxious thoughts ruminating throughout the pregnancy and how it’s better to address these as early on as possible. Anxiety in pregnancy study - would you like to take part? If you’re interested in taking part then this is who we’re looking for; Must be between 12-16 weeks pregnant when beginning the study. Must be at least 18 years old. Must be able to speak and read fluent English. Must be a UK resident. You can either or you can About Dr Megan Barnard I am a Teaching Associate at the University of Nottingham’s School of Psychology, having received my PhD in Psychology in 2017. When I am not teaching students, I am interested in conducting research on the impact that anxiety has in the real world? In other words, does it stop us from doing the things we want to do, and how can we relieve some of that anxiety in order to improve our wellbeing? I have looked into the effects on anxiety within areas such as transportation and cyberpsychology, and am now working with Alexia to see if psychological interventions can reduce levels of anxiety and depression during pregnancy. Sources Research by Lee et al. (2007) and Teixeira, Figueiredo, Conde, Pacheco, and Costa (2009) revealed a varied prevalence of pregnancy anxiety at different trimesters of pregnancy with high levels in first and third trimesters. Catov et al., 2010, Hernandez-Martinez et al., 2011, Lobel et al., 2008, Rauchfuss and Maier, 2011. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/12002357

Thomas Verny, Father of Prenatal Psychology 01/31/2019

Thomas Verny, Father of Prenatal Psychology Prenatal psychology is an area of psychology that looks at the psychological changes that women go through from conception to postpartum. If you're going to better understand your fears and anxieties during pregnancy then I think understanding prenatal psychology is pretty crucial. The journey to motherhood is one of massive change for a woman and is often accompanied by fear, insecurity, and stress. There is so much that could go wrong: preterm birth, an especially traumatic birth, problems breastfeeding, problems bonding with the baby, miscarriage, problems conceiving… gosh the list goes on! How prenatal psychology can help But mamas-to-be can handle their fears by drawing on ideas from prenatal psychology. Prenatal psychology can give you psychological resources for whatever may come your way: grief after a miscarriage, complicated parenting issues, bonding with their child, etc. For me, the biggest thing I took away from prenatal psychology was getting to grips with the idea that I could consider my unborn baby as a human being from my third trimester. This represented quite a shift in my thinking and my approach to pregnancy. Once you accept that you're carrying another human being who is able to listen, feel and hear around with you while your pregnant, then it invites some changes to your behaviour. "By the end of the second trimester, the unborn child is a sensing, feeling and sensible (and remembering) human being." Thomas Verny During our chat I put these questions to Thomas; What should a mother focus on during her pregnancy to improve the likelihood of a positive birth outcome? What can a mother do during pregnancy to nurture the baby? Can babies understand what their mothers are thinking when pregnant? Do babies pick up on the emotional journey of the mother during pregnancy? What are some causes of tokophobia [the extreme fear of pregnancy/birth]? Does the type of birth we have - vaginal unassisted, forceps, c-section etc - have any psychological impact on us? As you can see from these questions, they have the potential to reveal some fascinating answers, and Thomas doesn't disappoint. I was in heaven! Thomas starts by sharing some key factors that pregnant women should focus on during pregnancy to improve the likelihood of a positive birth outcome. These include; A desire for a child Relationship with her partner Relationship with one’s own mother Your own birth Some people might be surprised at these because they are not things we tend to see in the typical birth prep lists alongside the more expected items like nutrition exercise or birth education. Thomas shares some interesting perspectives that are definite food for thought. We chat about the importance of tuning into our babies and how best to do that and Thomas shares some ways that mamas-to-be can nurture baby during pregnancy. We also discuss fertility and how stress affects fertility. How our birth type affects our thinking The bit that I think you'll love though is what he has to say about our birth type, and what kind of mental and emotional patterns they can lay in place. Things like; Forceps birth - Pain in the neck is a common theme for them. At times of stress, they will likely have pain in the head or shoulders. C-section birth - Common thoughts will include "I can’t make it on my own", "If I’m in a tight place, people will come to my rescue" Breech birth - They are the most hard headed of people "It's my way or the highway". They don't want to conform. So, as you can see, this really is a fasinating chat and one that I think could really shift your perspective of your pregnancy journey. Let me know what you think in the comments! About Thomas Verny Thomas R. Verny is a psychiatrist, writer and academic. He has previously taught at Harvard University, University of Toronto, York University, Toronto and St. Mary’s University Minneapolis, Minnesota. Dr. Verny's books, professional publications and founding of the PPPANA, now APPPAH, and the Pre- and Perinatal Journal, have established him as one of the world's leading authorities on the effect of the prenatal and early postnatal environment on personality development. He lectures and leads workshops on Prenatal and Perinatal Psychology and Psychotherapy through-out Canada, the United States, Europe, South America and Southeast Asia. Thomas Verny's Books The Secret Life of the Unborn Child Pre-parenting Cellular Consciousness /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/8378489

7 Signs of a Woman with Tokphobia 01/17/2019

7 Signs of a Woman with Tokphobia How to tell if you know a woman with tokophobia Tokophobia is the extreme fear of pregnancy and birth. It’s not very well known and yet it can affect a lot of women. This extreme or pathological fear of birth is estimated to affect between 4 and 43% of women. 14% is an accepted estimate. So you see, a lot more common than you might think. Sadly, many women with tokophobia avoid pregnancy despite being desperate to be mothers. But that doesn’t mean you won’t come across it. Some women only realise they have tokophobia once they’re pregnant. Up until that point, they might feel that “I’m just not maternal” or “I don’t like kids” which is something you hear a lot. However, both of these are typical comments made by women with tokophobia. It is simply their fear speaking. Of course, there are also many women who simply don’t want kids who say these things. But it’s possible that when a woman says she doesn’t want kids that her fear is clouding her judgement, or that her true feelings are buried beneath the fear. Once she has overcome her tokophobia, she may very well change her mind. I’ve seen this a lot with the women I’ve worked with. In fact, it was something that I used to say all the time. I recently met up with some people who I’d not seen for ten years and both of them told me how they would never have imagined that I would have had kids; they thought I didn’t want any! Well, that changed once I’d overcome my fears. Why it's important to know if a woman has tokophobia It can be easy to shrug this phobia off as silly or irrational, but doing that is missing the point. Many women with tokophobia don’t see this fear as irrational. You can actually die in childbirth: that’s something worth fearing. Compare that to claustrophobia; being trapped in an enclosed space is not known to be fatal. The fact is, a woman with tokophobia would love a bit of kindness and understanding about how she's feeling. Having tokophobia can feel incredibly isolating because people don't understand and are quick to judge. Here's one woman's experience of sharing how she felt; I just explained that I suffer from tokophobia and I was looking for some positive encouragement, maybe some stories from people who had been through it and could tell me some positive things. What I got instead was the nastiest group of mean girls I've encountered in a very long time. Seriously, these women jumped all over me. The pitchforks immediately came out. It was seriously upsetting! I hope that by sharing this, that you can better understand what they're experiencing. If you have a wife or partner is tokophobic then maybe this post will help to explain things that you may have observed in your relationship. If you have friends who you suspect might have tokophobia then maybe this post will help you to better understand them. 7 signs of women with tokophobia Not all women with tokophobia will experience all of these, but if a handful of them are present, then it’s a pretty good sign. 1. They avoid conversations of babies, pregnancy and birth It’s often assumed that women love nothing better than to talk babies, but this simply isn’t true. Women with tokophobia will tend to remain silent if there is a group conversation that touches on babies, pregnancy or birth. They might do this because they simply have nothing to say and they can’t relate to what’s being said. But it could also be that they daren’t say anything because of the possible reaction from other women. Very often, women with tokophobia find that when they speak up about how they’re feeling, that other women do not understand or shrug off their feelings. They might feel judged or ashamed so they keep quiet. 2. They don’t want to hold a baby Holding a baby could easily freak them out and bring out quite a reaction. This means that they’ve probably never held a baby. 3. They have medical fears Women with tokophobia tend to have one or more fears that are related to medical things. So having a fear of needles and injections, fear of hospitals or doctors or a fear of medical procedures like vaginal examinations are very common. 4. They obsess over birth control A woman with tokophobia will want to avoid pregnancy and birth at all costs so birth control could easily be an obsession for them. Pregnancy tests will be a huge source of terror for them because of what they might tell them. They might find themselves fantasising about things like artificial wombs because they simply don’t want to carry the baby. This means they might be interested in surrogacy or fostering as alternatives. 5. They’re uncomfortable getting intimate or having sex This is simply because sex leads to pregnancy, and pregnancy leads to birth, both of which has the potential to terrify them. So for a woman with tokophobia, the best way to avoid either is simply to avoid sex. This means that getting intimate might be problematic for them too because that might lead to sex. Many women with tokophobia find that they struggle to develop intimate relationships because of this. Or they sabotage relationships at a particular stage in the relationship. This is often the Let’s Get Serious stage where babies are discussed, but it might be sooner when sex starts to be more present in the relationship. 6. They resent gender inequality and men not having to give birth It's common for a woman with tokophobia to think that it’s not fair that women have to go through the life experience that is pregnancy and childbirth. Because they consider both pregnancy and childbirth to be so negative, they hate the fact that they are the ones in the relationship that will have to undergo the hardship and risks of pregnancy and birth. Some even resent men for this, although not all. 7. They have a fear of death This might be a fear of them dying in childbirth or the baby. At a lesser level, this might be a fear of complications or things going wrong. They don’t consider this fear to be irrational as it’s often portrayed. For them, this is a rational fear; maternal mortality is something they take very seriously and they will probably be very clued up on the statistics. These are just a few of the tell-tale signs of women with tokophobia. If you think you know a woman with tokophobia, then be kind and understanding. And finally, I think it’s worth saying that tokophobia isn’t limited to women. Men can have it too If a man has it and his partner is pregnant, then it could mean that he might really struggle with being in the birth room when the time comes for the arrival of the baby. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/8248412

The Maternal Brain 11/01/2018

The Maternal Brain Today's podcast is all about the maternal brain and the neuroscience of pregnancy, birth, postpartum and parenting. A few months back I shared an about the maternal brain on my Facebook page and it went a bit nuts. It's since been shared over 40 times which is unprecedented for my Facebook page. It also received tons of comments, many of which were saying how the article helped them to better understand what they were going through. So I knew I had to cover this topic on the podcast. I reached out to the expert that was quoted in the article, Jodi Pawluski, and was thrilled when she agreed to come on the podcast to talk about all things maternal brain. Jodi Pawluski is a perinatal mental health expert and Research Associate at the University of Rennes in France. Her research aims to promote maternal mental health: enhancing the health and well-being of both the mother and child. Her research focus is to determine the behavioral and neurobiological processes underlying maternal mental illness and use this information to improve mental health in women during the perinatal period. In other words, she knows a thing or two about the maternal brain! The Maternal Brain During our conversation, Jodi talks about the changes that are happening to our brain during pregnancy and how it's an important evolution for becoming a new parent how we have new brain circuitry coming online that provides us with the ability to tune into our infant by enabling us to experience a feeling of reward from our child and a feeling of attachment changes to the mood and emotions during pregnancy the role of the environment on the maternal brain aka "pregnancy brain" how quickly a mother can tune into her infant After half an hour of touching your baby's hand, you will recognise your baby's hand from touch alone. Pregnancy Brain We talk about whether this is a "thing". Some articles have stated that it's not a thing, so we talk about what it could be instead and why it might feel that it really IS a thing. 15% of women during pregnancy will have a high level of anxiety We touch on the important topic of anxiety and depression during pregnancy and taking medication when pregnant. And, we also cover the brain changes happening to dads.... there is so much in this conversation! Further Resources /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/7336736

Pregnancy Body Changes 10/25/2018

Pregnancy Body Changes Worrying about pregnancy body changes is something most pregnant women worry about. Whether it's the expected changes in the shape of your body as pregnancy progresses, to the least expected changes that might happen as a result of birth complications - and everything in between! Pregnancy body changes are a huge source of worry for women which is why I wanted to talk about this on the podcast. To help do that I’m going to be joined by Bianca and Natasha from . They have a doula business and have been working with women for over 10 years so they’ve seen it all when it comes to women getting worried about pregnancy body changes. We cover quite a few angles when it comes to pregnancy body changes, from plus size pregnancies, to being pregnant when fit and of course vaginal tearing.. and lots more. Pregnancy Body Changes The adjustment you need to go through in how you perceive your body once you’re pregnant is quite significant. Many women have worries when it comes to pregnancy body changes which mean they struggle with this adjustment. This is particularly so for women who have strong feelings around their body - whether that's love because they've spent a lot of effort being fit or whether they don't like their body. Common worries and fears around pregnancy body changes include; "why isn’t my pregnancy going like a “normal” pregnancy?" ..... whatever *that* is! “I’m worried about gaining too much weight during my pregnancy" Plus size pregnancy We talk about BMI measurement and the obese categories. Yes, a BMI of 30 and above carries risks, but it’s simply an increased risk, not an absolute or guaranteed outcome. As with all risks, it's crucial to understand what the numbers are telling you. The important thing to bear in mind is that with plus size pregnancies, positive outcomes are all possible! Did you know that a common misguided belief is that overweight women are not strong enough to birth their babies? And another is that their vagina will be too fat. Yes, you read that right. A fat vagina! Since when can you get a fat vagina?? How can a hole get fat? #crazytalk We also talk about the importance of ditching the yo-yo dieting habit Fit women The Bebo Mia ladies are clear to state that it's important for women to give themselves at least 6 weeks to recover. They encourage women to connect to their postpartum body rather than focus on trying to re-establish their pre-baby body. Another common problem is that some women are too scared to gain weight during pregnancy, with some women working out too much because they’re worried about gaining more than 25 pounds. Changes down below No chat about pregnancy body changes would be complete without talking about vaginal tearing. I know! Vaginal tearing is a HUGE fear among pregnant women. And yet interestingly, when I speak to women about their birth stories, vaginal tearing rarely features as something they worry about during birth - with many not even noticing it happening when it does. This vagina talk also covers; the husband stitch the importance of pelvic work This is a great episode that is made brilliant by my fabulous guests, who have also offered a discount on all courses on their site. Use the code FEARFREE20 to access the discount mentioned on the chat. /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/7274360

Preparing for Motherhood, with Sophie Brigstocke 10/18/2018

Preparing for Motherhood, with Sophie Brigstocke In today's podcast episode I'm honoured to be joined by Sophie Brigstocke. Sophie won Doula of the Year in 2017, so this is a real treat - my second Doula of the Year guest! As well as being a doula, Sophie also runs Nurturing Birth where she trains doulas alongside her co-founder Florence Etienne-Jackson. Together they have trained over 3000 doulas, so she knows a thing or two about birth and supporting women as they approach motherhood. It was really tricky to pick a title for today's podcast because we talked about so much. But it's all birthy and all very interesting! Some of the things we talk about include; Sophie's epic 10-day labour - YES you read that right... 10-day labour! her ECV and her difficult birth experience planning her subsequent VBAC her elective emergency c-section Preparing for motherhood and parenting We talked a lot about how we can use pregnancy to prepare for motherhood. Often the focus of pregnancy is preparing for the birth, but preparing for motherhood is also important because there are things that can be done during pregnancy to lay the foundation. Sophie shares with us that a lot of couples come unstuck with a new baby and they say they would have liked to have had help to prepare their relationship for the arrival of the baby. And yet, when classes were put on, no-one signed up. The benefit of hindsight, eh? the case for ditching parenting books and tuning into your baby why the mother is the expert on her baby the importance of tuning into the mothering instinct what women can do during pregnancy to prepare why psychological preparation is important maternal mental health Let’s take the emphasis OFF what we need to BUY materialistically. Let’s think a lot more about what we need to invest in for our mental and emotional well-being. Sophie tells us that "in terms of a good head space, preparing for the birth has a big impact. Your birth informs your postnatal period in a big way. I felt like my body had let me down. The positive feelings from having a good breastfeeding journey made such a difference” We also talk about breastfeeding and touch on some common breastfeeding myths. And any birth conversation is not exactly complete unless oxytocin is mentioned! Sophie feels that "oxytocin isn’t talked about enough. It has an important role in early parenting too; it’s part of breastfeeding." About Sophie Brigstocke Sophie is a birth and postnatal doula, Doula Mentor at Doula UK, Breastfeeding Supporter and Baby Massage Teacher. She was awarded “Doula of the Year” at MaMa Conference, 2017. Sophie started working with mums and babies in 2004 when she trained as a baby massage teacher with Peter Walker, something she regularly teaches with busy courses around SW London. She also trained as a Therapeutic Massage Practitioner at the London College of Massage, specialising in Pregnancy and Post-Natal treatments. She offers Closing the Bones postnatal massage and ceremony to new mothers, as well as babywearing support. You track Sophie down at . /episode/index/show/fearfreechildbirth/id/7222844

Fear Free Childbirth Podcast with Alexia Leachman

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