Libsyn Directory

Episode 34 | Boom Boom Beige

Release Date: 05/01/2025

Episode 39 | Living Rooms are for LIVING

Hey White Women

In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca unpack what happens when white belief in institutional fairness collides with the lived reality of systemic injustice. Daniella reflects on a moment of betrayal in traffic court and how it cracked open her assumptions about justice, privilege, and whiteness. The conversation weaves through topics like the myth of rule-following as protection, the military's blending of cultural vernaculars, and the unique disorientation white women face when systems stop working for them. They also explore how white women’s fear of “doing it wrong”—especially...

Episode 38 | Growth Is Uncomfortable

Hey White Women

In this powerful conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca unpack how systems—from the military to corporate culture to parenting ideologies—often rely on cult-like tactics to demand obedience, erase individuality, and sell comfort as a virtue. Together, they examine the roles of love bombing, future faking, and authoritarian control in everyday life, and ask what it means to reclaim personal autonomy after indoctrination. We talk about what happens when you stop waiting for permission, why “just doing what you're told” is a dangerous lesson to teach children, and how...

Episode 37 | Are Red-Heads Black?

Hey White Women

In this episode of Hey White Women, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca dive into the layered and surprising discourse around a viral TikTok trend that claimed “all redheads are Black.” What starts as a joke becomes a powerful lens for unpacking themes of othering, cultural belonging, and the danger of conformity in white-dominant spaces. The hosts explore how redheaded individuals are often dehumanized through humor, hypersexualization, and alienation—even as whiteness shields them from systemic racism. This conversation becomes a springboard into deeper critiques of whiteness,...

Episode 36 | Growth Before Activism

Hey White Women

In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca engage in a deep conversation about the complexities of white supremacy, the importance of listening to Black voices, and the need for white women to confront their own roles in social justice movements. They explore hypothetical scenarios regarding protests, the significance of community, and the dangers of ignoring the perspectives of marginalized groups. The discussion emphasizes the necessity of personal growth and genuine engagement in anti-racism work, while also addressing the cyclical nature of blame and the illusion of safety in activism. ...

Episode 35 | Colors for Community

Hey White Women

In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore the intersections of fashion, identity, and race, discussing how personal expression through clothing can challenge societal norms. They delve into the complexities of navigating whiteness in diverse spaces, the cultural disconnect evident in social interactions, and the significance of color as a form of resistance. The discussion also touches on the importance of critiquing whiteness, understanding cult dynamics through the Byte model, and the value of personal narratives in shaping identity. They emphasize the role of community in fostering...

Episode 34 | Boom Boom Beige

Hey White Women

Episode 33 | Protest or Parade?

Hey White Women

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of race, activism, and the impact of online criticism, particularly on black women. They discuss the intersection of political identity and extremism, the role of white women in social movements, and the importance of listening to marginalized voices. The conversation delves into the dynamics of whiteness in society, the power of storytelling, and the journey of self-discovery in the context of anti-racism. Ultimately, they emphasize the need for community support and the role of women in driving social change. In this...

Episode 32 | "Lickies and Chewies?"

Hey White Women

This conversation delves into the complexities of race, privilege, and activism, particularly focusing on the experiences of black women and the reactions of white women in the context of social justice. The speakers discuss the historical and current realities of systemic oppression, the implications of language, and the importance of listening and learning from marginalized voices. They also explore the nature of groupthink, the illusion of safety, and the responsibilities of individuals in activism. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of group dynamics, the...

Episode 31 | Defensiveness and White Identity

Hey White Women

In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore the complexities of race, identity, and the dynamics of power within societal structures. They discuss the defensiveness often exhibited by white women in conversations about race, the impact of language, and the role of white women in perpetuating systems of oppression. The dialogue emphasizes the importance of acknowledgment, healing, and the responsibility that comes with privilege. They also touch on the significance of community and the need for open, honest discussions about race and identity. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella...

Episode 30 | Speaking equitably with confidence

Hey White Women

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca delve into the complexities of cult dynamics, particularly focusing on the Nation of Islam. They explore personal experiences with cults, the intersection of race and cults, and the societal responses to these groups. The discussion highlights the role of white women in these conversations, the importance of listening and learning from diverse experiences, and the manipulative tactics employed by cults. The speakers emphasize that conflict can be a necessary part of understanding and navigating these topics, and they advocate for a more nuanced...

More Episodes

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of platform building, the evolution of ideas, and the impact of cultural narratives on personal identity. They discuss the importance of vulnerability in leadership, the tenets of white supremacy, and the challenges of navigating capitalism and professionalism. The dialogue emphasizes the significance of shared experiences and the need to reopen historical conversations while addressing the dehumanization inherent in capitalist systems. In this conversation, Rebecca and Daniella explore the intersections of capitalism, storytelling, and identity. They discuss the metrics of progress, the complexities of human experience, and the importance of vulnerable storytelling. The dialogue delves into cultural appropriation versus appreciation, the tenets of white supremacy, and the military experience as a lens for understanding identity. They emphasize the need for joy in resistance and the discomfort that comes with navigating these conversations, ultimately challenging the notion of individual specialness in a collective human experience.

Connect with Rebecca at:

The White Woman Whisperer Website

The White Woman Whisperer Patreon

The White Woman Whisperer TikTok

Connect with Daniella at:

You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured

For more info on me:

Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding

Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding

Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured

Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8

Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady

Instagram: https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_

Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook

Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8

Takeaways

Building a platform often starts with uncertainty.
Hindsight thinking can be counterproductive.
Cultural narratives shape our understanding of apocalyptic scenarios.
Public panic can stem from misinformation.
Understanding white supremacy requires recognizing its tenets.
Vulnerability is essential for authentic leadership.
Exceptionalism is a fallacy that can hinder progress.
Planning must be adaptable to changing circumstances.
Capitalism often dehumanizes individuals in the workforce.
The line between expertise and guruism is crucial to navigate. When measuring progress, harm reduction is often overlooked.
The capitalist model prioritizes profit over meaningful solutions.
Storytelling should be rooted in vulnerability and authenticity.
Representation matters in how stories are told and received.
Finding joy in difficult times can be a form of resistance.
Difficult stories need to be shared to foster understanding.
Discomfort is a necessary part of growth and conversation.
Cultural appropriation and appreciation are nuanced topics.
Empathy should be abundant and not seen as scarce.
Individual specialness is a myth; we are all part of a collective experience.

Chapters

00:00 Building Platforms and Overcoming Fear
06:38 Exploring Apocalyptic Narratives and Cultural Reflections
12:38 Understanding White Supremacy and Its Tenets
18:48 Planning and Adaptability in Crisis
31:12 The Uniqueness of Human Experience
32:40 Patterns of Coercive Control
34:29 Defining Cults and Their Implications
36:08 The Complexity of Solutions
37:08 Language and Problem Solving
38:44 Revisiting Social Issues
40:50 Accessibility of Knowledge
42:59 The Role of Agency in the Present
45:34 Cultural Perspectives on Crisis
47:10 The Seriousness of Professionalism
49:57 Gendered Perceptions of Professionalism
52:17 Manipulation in Organizational Psychology
54:39 Capitalism and Dehumanization
56:47 Self-Compassion and Growth
58:30 The Metrics of Progress and Profit
01:01:32 The Cult of Technology and Capitalism
01:04:02 Storytelling and Representation
01:07:46 The Emotional Connection in Storytelling
01:10:53 Discomfort and Expertise
01:13:38 The Importance of Conversations
01:16:38 Cultural Attitudes Towards Sex and Consent
01:19:46 The Why Behind the What
01:26:29 Finding Joy in Adversity
01:30:42 Cultural Appropriation vs. Cultural Appreciation
01:35:45 Understanding White Supremacy and Its Impact
01:40:48 The Military Experience and Gender Dynamics
01:45:39 The Complexity of Identity and Experience
01:49:33 Concluding Thoughts on Discomfort and Growth

TOPICS