Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 63 | Performative Relief
Release Date: 01/15/2026
Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 64 | Respectability Rebranded
Hey White Women
In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca explore how white womanhood functions as a powerful cultural and political identity within American systems of power. The conversation examines how whiteness, gender, and class intersect to produce both vulnerability and authority, and how white women are often positioned as both victims and enforcers within oppressive structures. Together, they unpack how safety narratives, respectability politics, and emotional performances have historically been weaponized to uphold racial hierarchies while obscuring class struggle. The episode ultimately reframes white...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 63 | Performative Relief
Hey White Women
In this episode, Daniella is joined by White Woman Whisperer for a wide-ranging, unflinching conversation about whiteness, community, deconstruction, and political responsibility. Using current events, historical context, and personal experience, they explore why white Americans, especially white women, struggle to form collective resistance, how cult dynamics show up in liberalism and patriotism, and why deconstruction often feels like loss before it becomes liberation. The conversation challenges performative allyship, critiques victimhood narratives, and emphasizes that real change...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Women Whisperer | 62 | Driving While White
Hey White Women
In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca explore how whiteness, cult conditioning, and authoritarian systems shape fear, behavior, and identity, using car trauma, policing, and “common sense” social scripts as entry points. Daniella connects her evangelical cult upbringing to intense driving anxiety rooted in ritualized fear of death, while Rebecca situates car anxiety within racialized policing and survival awareness. From there, the conversation expands into white privilege as the absence of danger, the dehumanization embedded in rhetorical questions, and how “anti-identity” often...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 61 | Moral Superiority Binaries
Hey White Women
In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca unpack the backlash following Jasmine Crockett’s announcement that she’s running for Senate, focusing on how quickly public support—especially from white women—turned into purity testing. They examine why Black women in power are routinely held to impossible moral standards, particularly around U.S. support for Israel, while white politicians are rarely scrutinized the same way. The conversation expands into how whiteness flattens complexity into good/bad binaries, how “moral superiority” becomes a performance, and how this dynamic ultimately...
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Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | 60 | De-radicalization
Hey White Women
In this episode, Rebecca and Daniella dive into how cult dynamics show up way beyond just “cults.” Daniella shares pieces of her childhood in the Children of God and how those patterns of coercion, shame, and identity erasure followed her into adulthood—including her time in the military. They compare notes on how institutions, extremist movements, and even online communities use the same tactics to control people, and why so many folks get pulled into these systems in the first place. The conversation stays honest, nuanced, and very human as they talk about deradicalization, belonging,...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 59 | In-Person Special Episode
Hey White Women
In this in-person episode, Daniella and Rebecca dive deep into racial dynamics, whiteness, group behavior, cult patterns, and the ways white women, white culture, and American norms create invisible and often unexamined hierarchies. They explore how racism shows up in everyday interactions — such as being asked to “prove” a lived experience, being demanded to provide citations, or being treated as less credible unless a white source confirms it. They move through topics including camera/lens racism, anti-Blackness in beauty and hair culture, the Puritan roots of American “purity,”...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 58 | Puritan Whiteness
Hey White Women
This episode is a wide-ranging conversation between Daniella and Rebecca about the everyday and systemic ways whiteness shapes culture, identity, and behavior. They discuss how beauty standards, camera technology, tanning culture, and even small tech features like autocapitalization reflect racial bias. A major theme is how white women often derail or center themselves in conversations about race, sometimes unintentionally, through whitesplaining or over-explaining. They explore beauty labor, the politics of hair and appearance, and how the same practices (such as time-consuming beauty...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 57 | Who's Speaking Matters
Hey White Women
This episode features a deep, nuanced conversation between Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca about whiteness, power, community, cultural disconnection, and the complicated dynamics of speaking about social issues publicly. They explore how race, gender, and perceived authority shape who is “allowed” to say what, and how society reacts differently depending on the identity of the speaker. Their discussion spans topics such as the weaponization of “niceness,” internal policing within white communities, the loss of joy in white American culture, the effects of cult-like systems,...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 56 | Enablism
Hey White Women
In this wide-ranging and incisive conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca (White Woman Whisperer) examine how white womanhood functions within patriarchal and white supremacist systems. They discuss cultural habits like performative complaining, body-shaming as small talk, and the defense of harmful relationships as coping mechanisms inherited from historical gender norms. The two connect these behaviors to broader enablism within oppressive systems, drawing parallels between interpersonal and systemic patterns of abuse. They explore the emotional labor of deconstruction—how...
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Hey White Women w/ Knitting Cult Lady & White Woman Whisperer | 55 | Weaponizing Whiteness
Hey White Women
In this episode, Daniella Mestyanek Young (Knitting Cult Lady) and Rebecca (White Woman Whisperer) unpack the process of recording the audiobook version of Daniella’s upcoming book and explore how their collaboration reflects deeper dynamics of race, privilege, and creative responsibility. They discuss rejecting the “easy” or most cost-effective route in favor of ethical decisions that honor Black voices and resist capitalist shortcuts. The conversation then broadens into weaponizing whiteness for good—how white women can leverage social privilege to confront injustice—and the...
info_outlineIn this episode, Daniella is joined by White Woman Whisperer for a wide-ranging, unflinching conversation about whiteness, community, deconstruction, and political responsibility. Using current events, historical context, and personal experience, they explore why white Americans, especially white women, struggle to form collective resistance, how cult dynamics show up in liberalism and patriotism, and why deconstruction often feels like loss before it becomes liberation. The conversation challenges performative allyship, critiques victimhood narratives, and emphasizes that real change requires sustained discomfort, relational courage, and a willingness to lose certainty, status, and sometimes relationships.
Event Links:
https://www.mobilize.us/indivisibleturningthetables/event/884215/
Rebecca's Links:
https://www.whitewomanwhisperer.com
https://www.patreon.com/whitewomanwhisperer
https://www.tiktok.com/@whitewomanwhisperer
Connect with Daniella at:
Uncultured by Daniella Mestyanek Young
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UnAMERICAN Videobook
Key Takeaways
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White America lacks a cohesive community identity, which makes collective resistance and accountability difficult.
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White women are often socialized into victimhood narratives that discourage agency and action.
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Deconstruction is not just intellectual; it involves grief, loss of pride, and loss of certainty.
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Cult dynamics show up in nationalism, liberal purity politics, and demands for perfection.
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Performative action provides emotional relief but avoids real responsibility.
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Resistance requires grounding, relationship-building, and long-term commitment, not savior figures.
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Fear-driven reactions prevent strategic thinking and meaningful organizing.
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Deconstructing harmful systems often costs social approval, but the cost of silence is higher.
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Being willing to be wrong, imperfect, and disliked is essential for growth and change.
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Real solidarity is relational, not conceptual, and requires sustained bravery.
Chapters
00:00 Navigating Activism and Community Dynamics
08:24 The Role of White Women in Social Movements
11:14 Historical Context of Resistance and Protest
13:46 Deconstructing Identity and National Pride
16:49 The Challenges of Personal Relationships in Activism
19:38 The Complexity of Deconstruction and Self-Expression
22:31 Facing Criticism and Embracing Change
30:56 Navigating Conversations on Race and Understanding
34:19 The Role of White Women in Social Change
37:59 The Complexity of Martial Law and Resistance
42:42 Conversations Around Revolution and Action
46:36 The Impact of Whiteness on Society
48:45 Rethinking Leadership and Power Dynamics
54:10 The Game of Life and Social Expectations
56:13 Challenging Societal Norms and Personal Journeys
58:33 The Impact of Historical Trauma on White Women
01:02:23 Deconstructing White Supremacy and Its Effects
01:04:42 The Importance of Grassroots Education and Action
01:11:59 Taking Action Against Fascism and Community Engagement
Produced by Haley Phillips