loader from loading.io

046: Attachment Theory 101

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Release Date: 01/01/2024

063: Understanding and Overcoming the Freeze Response in Relationships with Lauren Dry show art 063: Understanding and Overcoming the Freeze Response in Relationships with Lauren Dry

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

In this episode of the Communicate and Connect Podcast, Liz talks with relationship coach Lauren Dry about the freeze response and how it shows up in communication, connection, and conflict. The freeze response is one of the most misunderstood nervous system reactions, especially in relationships. It can look like emotional shutdown, disconnection, or indifference but it’s actually a survival mechanism. Lauren explains why the freeze response happens, how it affects both partners, and what you can do to move from disconnection to reconnection. In this episode, you’ll learn: What...

info_outline
062: How to deal with different parenting styles with Adam Angel show art 062: How to deal with different parenting styles with Adam Angel

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to this episode of The Communicate & Connect Podcast, where we tackle the ever-relevant topic of how to deal with different parenting styles. In today's conversation, host Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky is joined by Adam Angel, a specialist in supporting new dads and an advocate for thoughtful, collaborative parenting approaches. This episode is particularly significant for military families, who often face unique challenges and transitions. Adam begins by sharing his personal journey into fatherhood during the pandemic, which led to his development of a supportive group for new dads....

info_outline
061: How to improve intimacy in a relationship with Chloe Mascord show art 061: How to improve intimacy in a relationship with Chloe Mascord

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

In this episode of The Communicate & Connect Podcast, host Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky welcomes intimacy expert Chloe Mascord to the show, where they dive deep into the intricacies of nurturing intimacy within relationships, with a special focus on the unique dynamics faced by military couples. Chloe, renowned for her expertise in the field, discusses the common challenges and misconceptions surrounding intimacy, emphasizing the crucial distinction between intimacy and sex and the need for emotional closeness for a fulfilling intimate life. Throughout the episode, Chloe offers a wealth of...

info_outline
060: How to make your relationship STRONG with Kristal Desantis show art 060: How to make your relationship STRONG with Kristal Desantis

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to Episode 060 of The Communicate & Connect Podcast! I'm your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky, and today we have an enlightening conversation with the incredible Kristal Desantis, a licensed marriage and family therapist based in Austin, Texas. In this episode, we delve into the often-overlooked dynamics of men in relationships and the societal expectations that shape their roles and behaviors. Kristal shares her insights on the shifting roles of men, particularly the challenge of being valued for performance over personhood. We'll unpack the powerful metaphor of "lipstick on a...

info_outline
059: Military Spouse Relocation - Navigating leaving friends and home behind with Leigh Conant show art 059: Military Spouse Relocation - Navigating leaving friends and home behind with Leigh Conant

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to Episode 59 of the Communicate & Connect Podcast! I'm your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky, and today we have a deeply insightful conversation lined up with our special guest, Leigh Conant, a licensed marriage and family therapist specializing in the military community. In this episode, we dive into the emotional and logistical complexities of military spouse relocation. Leigh shares her personal experience moving from a well-established community in New Orleans to Camp Lejeune in North Carolina, detailing the mix of excitement and profound grief that comes with leaving friends...

info_outline
058: Coping with PCS Stress with Michelle Farmer show art 058: Coping with PCS Stress with Michelle Farmer

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to The Communicate & Connect Podcast with your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky. In today's episode, titled "Coping with PCS Stress with Michelle Farmer," we dive deep into the unique challenges faced by military families during Permanent Change of Station (PCS) moves. Joining us is Michelle Farmer, a true expert in navigating military life, having experienced it from multiple perspectives—as an army brat, a service member, a military spouse, and a member of the reserves. Michelle and Dr. Polinsky explore a range of topics, from the complexities of communication within families and...

info_outline
057: Navigating living overseas and OCONUS military life with Brianna Mendoza show art 057: Navigating living overseas and OCONUS military life with Brianna Mendoza

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to The Communicate & Connect Podcast! I'm your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky. In today's episode, we're diving into the unique challenges and enriching experiences that come with living overseas and navigating OCONUS military life. Our special guest, Brianna Mendoza, brings her wealth of experience as a military spouse and graduate student in marriage and family therapy, specifically focusing on military therapy. Brianna will share her journey of moving to Japan post-COVID, highlighting her adventures in nature hikes, traditional onsen visits, and connecting with locals through a...

info_outline
056: How to make a Military Marriage Work with Darrell and Veronica Williams show art 056: How to make a Military Marriage Work with Darrell and Veronica Williams

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to The Communicate & Connect Podcast with your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky. In today's episode, we're delving into the unique challenges and triumphs of military marriages with our special guests, Darrell and Veronica Williams. With an impressive 26-year marriage behind them, Darrell and Veronica share their journey from high school sweethearts to long-distance partners, offering invaluable insights into navigating military life together. Dr. Polinsky wraps up this heartfelt conversation by expressing gratitude for the wisdom and mentorship shared by the Williamses, and reminding...

info_outline
055: Attachment Theory and Domestic Violence with Jef Slootmaeckers show art 055: Attachment Theory and Domestic Violence with Jef Slootmaeckers

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome to Episode 55 of The Communicate & Connect Podcast! I'm your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky, and in today's episode, we're diving deep into the complex world of attachment theory and its intertwining with domestic violence, especially within the military context. Joining us is Jef Slootmaeckers, an Emotionally Focused Trainer with ICEEFT and therapist with a profound understanding of the relational dynamics related to domestic violence. In this episode, we explore the intricate balance between emotional regulation and survival strategies, focusing on the pivotal questions of...

info_outline
054: How to Deal with Separation Anxiety in Relationships with Megan McCullough show art 054: How to Deal with Separation Anxiety in Relationships with Megan McCullough

The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships

Welcome back to The Communicate & Connect Podcast, where we explore the intricate dynamics of relationships and mental well-being, especially within military families. I'm your host, Dr. Elizabeth Polinsky, and today we delve into Episode 54: "How to Deal with Separation Anxiety in Relationships." Joining us is Megan McCullough, a licensed clinical social worker and military spouse with 19 years of experience navigating the unique challenges of military life. In this episode, we'll uncover the often unspoken struggles faced by military spouses, who are expected to "suck it up" and push...

info_outline
 
More Episodes

Welcome to The Communicate & Connect Podcast for Military Relationships. I'm your host, Elizabeth Polinsky, and today we're talking about Attachment Theory, which plays a crucial role in understanding the dynamics of intimate relationships—particularly within military couples. This series is aimed at offering valuable insights into the intricacies of human attachment and how it can impact the resilience and satisfaction of couples navigating the complexities of military life.

In this episode, titled "Attachment Theory 101," we'll explore the fundamental concepts of Attachment Theory, originating from the pioneering work of John Bowlby. This theory investigates the significant impact that parent-child interactions have on personal development. We'll examine how these early attachments form an internal template that can affect our self-esteem and our ability to trust others as we grow into adulthood.

Throughout this series, I'll share perspectives from various experts in the field of Emotionally Focused Couple Therapy, a methodology deeply rooted in Attachment Theory. We will discuss how secure and insecure attachment styles manifest in relationships and their implications for couples experiencing the unique pressures of military life. From fears of abandonment and independence to the need for emotional closeness, understanding these dynamics is essential for fostering a supportive and stable partnership.

One of the key highlights of this episode is the relationship between attachment security and coping mechanisms. Based on my own research, I'll reveal how the quality of your marriage can significantly impact your resilience and ability to handle stress more effectively than individual coping abilities alone. This is particularly meaningful for military families, where deployment and frequent relocations pose additional stresses.

To help you assess the security of your own relationship, we're introducing a free, downloadable tool called the ARE Quiz. This quiz, developed from the Brief Accessibility, Responsiveness, and Engagement Scale used in my dissertation, allows you and your partner to measure the attachment-related behaviors in your relationship.

Make sure to like, review, and subscribe to get all the future episodes and help the podcast be found by others who would benefit the most.