Libsyn Directory

ERP 501: From Projection to Presence: The Art of Seeing and Being Seen — An Interview With David Mars

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Release Date: 11/04/2025

ERP 514: Measuring What Matters: How Awareness and Alignment Create Enduring Love - An Interview with Zoey Charif

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Ever wondered why, despite our best intentions, we keep falling into the same relationship traps? Or how two people can feel worlds apart even when they desperately want things to work? The subtle dance of self-worth, mutual respect, and compatibility often determines whether love thrives or fizzles out. Too often, we end up settling for relationships that slowly chip away at our confidence, hoping for change while ignoring the mismatch in values, traits, and emotional needs. In this episode, listeners are guided through a groundbreaking and practical approach for understanding the science...

ERP 513: Why Openness Matters More than Resolution in Couple Communication — An Interview with Kathryn Ford M.D.

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Ever felt like no matter how much you prepare for an important conversation with your partner, you still end up missing each other entirely? In the heat of tough conversations, even the best intentions can get lost as tension rises and defenses go up. It's all too easy for moments of misunderstanding to snowball, leaving both people feeling disconnected and unsure how to find their way back to each other. In this episode, you’ll discover a radically simple approach to transforming those tense moments into opportunities for true connection. Looking through the lens of openness, which the...

ERP 512: The Courage Practice: How Facing Fear Deepens Intimacy and Connection — An Interview with Scott Simon

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

What if playing it safe is actually keeping you from the life and relationships you truly want? Too often, fear convinces us to stay small, avoid discomfort, and stick to familiar routines, especially when it comes to our most important connections. The result? Missed opportunities for deep intimacy, vibrant trust, and authentic connection. It's a paradox: the very quest for comfort may be the greatest risk of all. In this episode, listeners are invited to challenge the idea that comfort equals happiness. Through inspiring stories and practical tools, the conversation explores how embracing...

ERP 511: From Protection to Connection: Healing Shame and Building Secure Connection — An Interview with Dr. Arielle Schwartz

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Have you ever wondered why, in the moments you crave connection the most, you suddenly find yourself pulling back or feeling unworthy of love? It’s a confusing cycle—wanting deep intimacy yet stumbling over old shame and protective patterns that keep you at arm’s length from those who matter most. The echoes of our early relationships can linger, quietly shaping the way we trust, open up, and even interpret simple gestures of kindness. Left unspoken and unexplored, these internal beliefs can create barriers to the very closeness we long for. In this episode, listeners are invited to take...

ERP 510: The Last 8%: How to Have the Conversations That Matter Most in Your Relationship — An Interview with Bill Benjamin

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Ever notice that it’s not the everyday conversations or simple disagreements that shape the quality of a relationship—it’s those high-stakes moments, the tough talks that feel risky and uncomfortable, that truly define the connection. Far too often, we skirt around what really needs to be said, trading short-term relief for long-term regret. Whether it’s at work or at home, these avoided discussions can lead to resentment, disconnection, and a sense of self-abandonment. In this episode, listeners will dive deep into understanding why we tend to avoid these “last 8%” conversations,...

ERP 509: When Ambition Costs Connection: How Overachievers Can Find Healthy, Aligned Love — An Interview with Keren Eldad

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Are you chasing every gold star, climbing every ladder, and nailing every “right” mark—only to find yourself missing out on real fulfillment and meaningful connection? The relentless pursuit of achievement can sometimes leave us feeling lonely, disconnected from ourselves, and trapped in relationships that don’t truly nourish our hearts. When ambition runs amok, the cost may be far greater than just burnout or missed vacation days—it can lead to self-abandonment and relationships that feel more like a cage than a home. In this episode, you’ll discover how overachievement and...

ERP 508: The Power of Collaboration: Building Trust and Connection in Love and Life — An Interview with Leslie Grossman

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

In a world that often glorifies rugged individualism, finding real connection and mutual growth with others can feel elusive, especially when it comes to our closest relationships. The secret ingredient might just be what so many overlook: genuine collaboration—both at home and beyond. What if the key to thriving wasn’t “doing it all yourself,” but learning how to truly work together? In this episode, you’ll discover how building circles of collaboration can transform your personal relationships, family dynamics, and even your broader social and professional connections. Through...

ERP 507: The Power of Attention: How to Access What Really Matters in Moments of Conflict — An Interview with Dana Caspersen

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Why do the smallest disagreements with loved ones sometimes feel like the fiercest battles? Conflict in relationships often spirals into unproductive cycles of attack and defense, leaving us stuck, misunderstood, and further apart from the connection we crave. We rush to defend, strategize, and fix—yet rarely pause long enough to truly understand what matters beneath the surface. In this episode, listeners are invited to explore powerful strategies for breaking the cycle of reactivity and shifting attention toward curiosity, clarity, and genuine understanding. Through personal stories,...

ERP 506: Regulate Your Body, Transform Your Bond: The Habit Science Behind Healthy Love — An Interview with Hadlee Garrison

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

Ever feel like your to-do list is running your life and you barely have any energy left for what matters most—like connecting with loved ones or just enjoying the moment? In our fast-paced world, we often believe productivity comes from pushing ourselves harder, burning the candle at both ends, and tackling more tasks. But what if the key to a happier, healthier life starts before you even get to your goals and conversations—right in the foundation of your daily rhythms and body awareness? In this episode, you’ll discover why tuning into your body’s core needs is the missing link for...

ERP 505: Money Wounds in Love: Healing the Hidden Stories Behind Your Spending and Saving — An Interview with Shari Rash

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

When was the last time you felt a sinking feeling just thinking about money? For many, money is far more than just numbers in a bank account—it's tangled up with our emotions, childhood experiences, and even our closest relationships. All too often, conversations around money get swept under the rug, leaving us to battle our financial stress and shame alone. But what if unraveling these hidden money wounds is the key to building stronger connections—with ourselves and with others? In this episode, listeners are invited to reimagine their relationship with money and begin addressing the...

More Episodes

Feeling unseen and misunderstood in your closest relationship can be one of the loneliest experiences, even when surrounded by family and friends. It's not uncommon for couples to fall into patterns of projection, reactivity, and defensiveness, leaving genuine intimacy and deep connection feeling just out of reach. How do we move from these cycles of blame and distance towards the kind of secure, transformative partnership that brings true accompaniment, dignity, and joy?

In this episode, you are invited to slow down and explore new pathways to presence and connection. Through practical tools, guided reflection, and insights rooted in transformative couples therapy, you’ll discover ways to move beyond automatic reactivity and habitual defense, and instead cultivate curiosity, somatic awareness, and genuine intimacy. Whether you’re looking to strengthen trust, improve communication, or rekindle the spark in a long-term bond, this conversation offers powerful guidance for anyone seeking more clarity, care, and lasting growth in their relationships.

Since 2008 Dr. David Mars has been the developer of Transformative Couples Therapy® (TCT). He leads seminars and training programs internationally on TCT. Affective neuroscience and attachment research are central to this experiential, somatically attuned and positivity-based method. Currently Dr. Mars also is the leader of a three-year project to quantify the results of TCT in preparation to offer published research on outcomes of the method. He is the Director of the Transformative Couples Therapy® Institute.

Episode Highlights

03:39 The impact of curiosity and projections in long-term relationships.

08:32 How attachment styles form early in life and opportunities for change.

10:05 The importance of somatic awareness, attunement, and slowing down in relationships.

15:42 Gender, stress, and the emotional costs of disconnection.

17:48 Strategies for setting boundaries and cultivating safe communication.

23:14 Transformation and growth through the I-Thou relationship.

24:43 Daily practices and the seven channels of experience in couples therapy.

29:49 Awareness of energetic imprints and somatic patterns from early life.

31:15 Navigating and embracing partner differences in relationships.

34:43 The role of journaling, self-regulation, and reverence in relational health.

40:57 Somatic-based modalities, resources, and generativity in relationships.

Your Check List of Actions to Take

Begin your conversations or sessions with your partner by sharing something you appreciate about each other to set a positive tone.
Take a deep inhale and exhale together to ground yourselves and invite presence before important discussions.
Communicate your feelings and needs using “I” statements to promote vulnerability and reduce defensiveness.
Speak directly to your partner, not just about them or through a third party, to foster genuine connection.
Notice and share your body sensations (like a tight chest or warm hands) during emotional exchanges to heighten self-awareness and attunement.
Approach your partner with genuine curiosity and try to witness their experience, rather than making assumptions or projecting your own perspective.
If either partner feels overwhelmed or unresourced, honor the need to pause and agree on a time to revisit the conversation.
Tune into the seven channels—sensation, emotion, energy, movement, auditory, visual, and imaginal—to enrich both your self-awareness and your communication with your partner.