The Hidden Trap in High-Conflict Divorce: When a Man Reacts Instead of Leads, with Holistic Health Practitioner Specializing in Integral Masculine Self-Development, Michael Holt
Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast
Release Date: 12/04/2025
Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast
In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, Karen McMahon sits down with divorce attorney Andrea Vacca, Esq. to explore the unique pressures of the holiday season when you’re considering divorce. This is the stage where uncertainty weighs heavily, information is still being gathered, and you may not be ready—or safe—to share your plans with anyone. Family gatherings, traditions, and expectations continue around you, even as you quietly wonder what the new year will bring. Karen and Andrea bring compassionate clarity to this “secret season,” discussing how to stay grounded,...
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In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, I’m speaking directly to the men who are walking through the intensity of high conflict divorce — the pressure, the triggers, the confusion, and the deep internal unraveling that often comes with it. Men in high conflict divorce are asked to hold an extraordinary amount: to respond instead of react, to stay grounded when provoked, and to lead even when everything around them feels uncertain. And while I coach men through these challenges every single day, I also know that some truths land more powerfully when they come from another man...
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In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, we dive deep with Cheryl, a mother of two, whose post-divorce journey reflects the emotional complexity so many women face when rebuilding their lives. Cheryl holds nothing back, discussing the early fears she carried—from concerns around safety and childhood wounds resurfacing, to the sheer uncertainty of starting over. Listen as she reveals the pivotal moment she discovered the power of listening to her body, trusting her intuition, and honoring her core values. We explore the critical role of boundaries in creating emotional...
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In this episode, I’m inviting you into one of the most tender and complicated questions you may ever face: How Do I Know If It’s Time to Divorce? If you’ve been living in a cycle of uncertainty, replaying conversations, second-guessing yourself, or worrying about the impact on your children, this conversation is designed to bring you clarity, calm, and a grounded sense of direction. I explore the fears and confusion that naturally arise when you’re considering divorce, and I help you distinguish between conflict that can be healed and patterns that may be too damaging or...
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In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, we explore one of the most important strategies for navigating divorce: building a collaborative team from the start. I talk with Andrea Vacca, a leading collaborative divorce attorney, about how legal, financial, and emotional professionals working together can reduce stress, protect your long-term goals, and create smoother outcomes. We discuss why early planning, intentional team alignment, and choosing the right divorce process—whether mediation, collaborative law, or litigation—are critical for managing high-conflict situations....
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Are you worried your spouse is hiding money or manipulating finances during your divorce? In high-conflict divorces, it’s all too common for funds to be moved, concealed, or dissipated, leaving one partner in the dark and anxious about their financial future. In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, I dive into the high-stakes world of divorce forensics and financial investigations, exploring what you need to know to protect yourself and your assets. I’m joined by seasoned forensic accounting expert Ilan Hirschfeld, who shares decades of experience uncovering hidden...
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Why do so many relationships fall apart because one partner can’t—or won’t—connect emotionally? Why do men and women alike find themselves trapped in cycles of emotional immaturity, disconnection, and pain that lead to divorce? For many women, life with an emotionally unavailable or immature partner feels confusing and isolating. For single moms, the question becomes: How do I raise an emotionally healthy son when his father isn’t modeling it? Yet men, too, often suffer in silence—many find themselves with emotionally unavailable or even abusive partners, unsure how to express...
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Have you ever wondered why, even after divorce, your ex still feels energetically present in your life? Divorce isn’t just the end of a relationship... it’s a profound emotional, energetic, and spiritual transition. Long after the legal papers are signed and the physical separation is complete, many people remain unconsciously bonded to their former spouse, feeling stuck in emotional patterns, attachment, or resentment that blocks healing, peace, and future love. In this powerful episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, I sit down with Joanna Shakti, the Soul Love™ Mentor and...
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When your wife says she wants a divorce... and you never saw it coming... it can feel like your world is collapsing. Most men panic in that moment. They chase, plead, argue, or withdraw… all the things that feel natural, but only push her further away. In this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, I sit down with transformational men’s coach Tim Wade, who brings over 25 years of experience helping men rebuild their marriages, their confidence, and their lives. Tim shares his own story of reconciliation after eight years of separation and the powerful lessons he’s learned guiding...
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Co-parenting is never easy—but when your ex displays narcissistic or emotionally abusive behaviors, it can feel impossible. You’re not just managing logistics—you’re protecting your peace, supporting your children, and trying not to lose yourself in the chaos. In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. David Hawkins, founder of the Marriage Recovery Center and the Emotional Abuse Institute. With over four decades of experience and more than 40 books to his name, Dr. Hawkins brings deep insight into what it takes to stay grounded and emotionally safe while co-parenting with a narcissist. We...
info_outlineIn this episode of the Journey Beyond Divorce Podcast, I’m speaking directly to the men who are walking through the intensity of high conflict divorce — the pressure, the triggers, the confusion, and the deep internal unraveling that often comes with it. Men in high conflict divorce are asked to hold an extraordinary amount: to respond instead of react, to stay grounded when provoked, and to lead even when everything around them feels uncertain. And while I coach men through these challenges every single day, I also know that some truths land more powerfully when they come from another man who embodies the discipline, steadiness, and intentional leadership required to rise during divorce.
That’s why I invited Michael Holt, founder of the international Savage & Saint Collective, to join me for this conversation. Michael has dedicated his life to helping men reclaim emotional sovereignty, cultivate presence, and embody a form of masculine leadership that is rooted in clarity rather than chaos. His work blends meditation, martial arts, psychology, holistic health, and serious inner discipline — and it aligns deeply with what I teach men navigating high conflict divorce: that the real power lies not in controlling others, but in mastering yourself.
Michael and I explore the patterns that keep men stuck in reactivity during divorce and the internal shifts required to break those cycles. We talk about the cost of abandoning your center, how quickly men give away their power when triggered, and what it takes to stay grounded when you feel attacked, misunderstood, or overwhelmed. Michael offers a male perspective on strength that doesn’t rely on force, suppression, or avoidance, but instead comes from presence, vitality, and self-awareness — qualities that become essential when the stakes are high and the conflict feels relentless.
Together, we dig into the difference between reactive masculinity and embodied leadership, and why men who learn to regulate their nervous system and stay anchored in who they are gain far more influence — not just in their divorce, but in their lives, relationships, and fatherhood. We discuss how men can cultivate discipline, stability, and clarity even in the middle of legal battles, emotional turmoil, and the dismantling of a marriage. This is the kind of conversation that gives men direction, grounding, and a roadmap for showing up as the man they want to be, not the man the conflict tries to turn them into.
Michael Holt is a powerful example of what it looks like to live the work rather than talk about it. His Savage & Saint Collective supports men around the world in strengthening their inner foundation so they can show up with integrity, courage, and calm — exactly what is needed in high conflict divorce.
If you’re a man navigating divorce and you’ve been searching for guidance from someone who truly understands the internal journey you’re on, this episode will offer the clarity and steadiness you’ve been craving. This is about reclaiming yourself, rebuilding your center, and stepping into the kind of leadership that can change the trajectory of your life.
Connect with Michael:
- Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/savageandsaint/
- Free Gift: E-Book re: Savage & Saint Philosophy: https://ebook.savageandsaint.com/savageandsaintphilosophy
- Masculine Vitality Program: https://savageandsaint.com/mens-courses/
Resources Mentioned in this Episode:
- Follow JBD on Instagram: @journey_beyond_divorce
- Book a Free Rapid Relief Call: http://rapidreliefcall.com
- Free Divorce Support Network Gift: https://divorcesupportnetwork.com/jbdpod