Turn Workplace Conflict Into Healing (with Susan Winchester)
Release Date: 12/15/2024
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info_outlineSomersaults on the floor. Singing. A blue baseball bat from Amazon, five dollars, used to whack a couch. That's not a breakdown, my guest Susan Winchester says, that's how you actually process workplace conflict instead of swallowing it. If your instinct is to picture your chief HR officer doing any of that, you've never met Susan.
Susan spent 36 years in corporate HR, including stints as chief HR officer for Applied Materials (a Fortune 150 Silicon Valley company) and Rockwell Automation. She's the co-author, with Martha Finney, of Healing at Work: A Guide to Using Career Conflicts to Overcome Your Past and Build the Future You Deserve, and for 30 of those 36 years, her accomplishments were fueled by a belief she never said out loud: that she wasn't good enough. She unpacks the Centers for Disease Control's landmark ACEs study (nearly two-thirds of us have at least one adverse childhood experience), and the "bumper car moments" concept she and Martha coined for what workplace conflict actually feels like when an old wound gets tapped.
You'll walk away with her three-step rapid power reclaim method for the exact moment you feel emotionally activated at work, why "getting the emotion out of your body" comes before any conversation, and why healing at work sometimes really does start with a baseball bat and a couch.
Watch this episode on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQ9hR4xUtBA
In this episode
- Why Susan calls the workplace a "laboratory" for emotional healing instead of something to just endure
- The CDC's ACEs study, and why nearly two-thirds of us carry at least one adverse childhood experience into our careers
- Big T vs. little t trauma, and why "a feeling of helplessness over a long amount of time" counts too
- The three-step "rapid power reclaim" for the moment you feel emotionally triggered at work: create choice, elevate action, celebrate and integrate
- What a "bumper car moment" is, and how naming it out loud can drain the whole charge
- Why healing at work almost always means facing pushback from family who liked the old, more people-pleasing version of you
Timestamps
- (00:01) Welcome and guest intro: meet former Fortune 150 chief HR officer Susan Winchester
- (01:13) The workplace as a laboratory: using conflict as a catalyst for emotional healing
- (02:39) The CDC/Kaiser ACEs study: nearly two-thirds of us carry at least one adverse childhood experience
- (05:00) Big T trauma vs. little t trauma, and "the unconscious wounded career path"
- (10:56) Almost not publishing Healing at Work: freezing in fear of being judged
- (14:33) The section Susan checkmarked twice: healing at work can trigger pushback from family
- (18:00) The rapid power reclaim, step one: create choice by getting the emotion out of your body
- (18:40) Step two, elevate action; step three, celebrate and integrate
- (23:26) The blue baseball bat and the somersaults: sound, movement, and breath in practice
- (25:37) What a "bumper car moment" is, and where the concept came from
- (29:30) The Power of Discord: why stepping into conflict builds stronger relationships
- (33:29) Where to find Susan Winchester, Healing at Work, and her free quiz
About Susan Winchester
Susan Winchester is the past chief HR officer for Applied Materials, a Fortune 150 Silicon Valley company, and Rockwell Automation. She's an author, sought-after keynote speaker, and HR consultant known for her book, Healing at Work: A Guide to Using Career Conflicts to Overcome Your Past and Build the Future You Deserve, co-written with Martha Finney.
Learn more at HealingAtWork.com, where you can also take her free quiz on what's fueling your workplace stress. Connect with Susan on Facebook, LinkedIn, or Instagram.
Favorite quotes
"30 of my 36 years, my accomplishments were really fueled by my own underlying belief that I wasn't good enough." —Susan Winchester
"We cannot create choice until we move that emotion out of our bodies." —Susan Winchester
"The bumper car moment is the catalytic moment for emotional healing." —Susan Winchester
Resources mentioned
- Healing at Work: Susan's book, co-written with Martha Finney
- HealingAtWork.com: Susan's website, with a free quiz on the root causes of your workplace stress
- Outlive by Dr. Peter Attia (referenced by Susan for its description of childhood trauma and helplessness)
- The Language of Letting Go by Melody Beattie (referenced for the idea of "letting other people be responsible for their own property")
- The Power of Discord by Dr. Ed Tronick and Dr. Claudia Gold (referenced on the power of stepping into conflict)
- Heal to Lead: Revolutionizing Leadership through Trauma Healing by Kelly L. Campbell (referenced by Susan alongside the rapid power reclaim method)
- MyHealingMenu.com: Kelly Campbell's compilation of somatic and body-based processing methods, mentioned by Susan
Related episodes
- The Path to Trauma-Informed Leadership: another guest tracing how unprocessed emotional wounds quietly run a career, from the leadership side.
- Setting Boundaries for Well-Being and Success: pairs with Susan's point that healing at work almost always means facing pushback when you set new boundaries with family.
- How to Spot Burnout Before It's Too Late: for anyone who recognized themselves in Susan's 30 years of "proving myself over and over."
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Curious where your own boundaries stand? Take my free Work Boundaries Quiz: danaskaggs.com/quiz