194: Doing All the Things Is Killing Your Tree of Life
Release Date: 11/20/2025
194: Doing All the Things Is Killing Your Tree of Life
SayTheThings's podcast
I'm kicking off a new series about letting go to uncover who we really are, inspired by John Acuff's Greatest Year Ever course. Just like the trees in fall draw their energy inward and release what no longer serves them, we need to learn to bring our energy back inside and use it with wisdom—not to meet everyone else's needs, but to sustain a healthy life. I've been questioning how our generation fell into the trap of doing all the things for all the people, treating ourselves like machines instead of humans who need rest and restoration. This week, I'm asking you to simply notice what needs...
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193: How to Come Back After You've Burned It Down
SayTheThings's podcast
Repair is the most skipped step in conflict work, and I've had to do a lot of it with my daughter after years of being too quick, too certain, and too afraid to be vulnerable. Today, I'm breaking down the four components of genuine repair—and why "I'm sorry, but..." will never rebuild what you've broken. This isn't a one-and-done process, and your timeline isn't their timeline—but every time you choose repair over justification, you're teaching the people you love that you're safe. https://www.instagram.com/nicole_bachle/
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192: What to Ask Before, During, and After the Fight
SayTheThings's podcast
Last Tuesday, my daughter came home frustrated and every instinct told me to fix it, control it, be right about it—but I paused and asked her what she thought her options were instead. This week, I'm sharing the specific questions that rewire how conflict happens: what to ask yourself before walking into hard conversations, how to stay present during them, and the reflection work that creates lasting change. Plus, I'm tackling the truth that 80% of conflict has no resolution—and why that's actually okay. https://www.instagram.com/nicole_bachle/
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191: Willpower Won't Regulate Your Nervous System
SayTheThings's podcast
Turns out, you can't think your way out of a fight-or-flight response—and that's why willpower alone never fixes how we show up in conflict. I'm walking you through what happens in your body during an argument, why my shift from fight to freeze confused my daughter's nervous system, and the practical tools that actually work to regulate yourself before, during, and after conflict. This is where we learn that our bodies aren't broken—they're just protecting us with outdated information. https://www.instagram.com/nicole_bachle/
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190: The Weapons We Carry in Conflict
SayTheThings's podcast
I used to be lightning-fast with my words—shutting down arguments before anyone could respond, winning every fight while losing connection. This week, we're getting honest about what we bring to conflict that makes it worse: unprocessed anger, the need to be right, defensiveness, or the ways we disguise control as care. If you're ready to stop having the same fight on different days, this episode is your starting point—because you cannot change what you do not see. Ryan Dunlap: Conflict/ish "Your life does not get better by chance, it gets better by change." — Jim Rohn...
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189: What If the Noise Holds the News?
SayTheThings's podcast
Most of us are grinding through life, dismissing the whispers of our body and our relationships because we don't have time to pause. But what if the noise we're taught to manage is actually news—information our lives are desperately trying to send us? I'm breaking down five concrete practices (that won't add to your plate) to help you shift from managing to listening, including nervous system regulation, creating safe space for vulnerability, and moving through stored stress in your body.
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188: Introducing Your Circle of Control
SayTheThings's podcast
A few weeks ago, I did an exercise that completely changed how I see control—and honestly, it pissed me off before it set me free. I drew a circle and listed what I actually control inside it and what I don't outside it, and the truth was brutal: I've been spending most of my energy trying to manage things that were never mine to hold. Today I'm walking you through this exercise and the new soundtracks that are helping me release my grip on other people, outcomes, the past, and the future—so I can finally be present in the one moment I actually have.
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187: Stop Competing, Start Connecting: Lessons from the Forest
SayTheThings's podcast
Research shows that trees don't compete for sunlight – they share resources through an underground network, warning each other of dangers and supporting the whole forest's health. I'm exploring how we can shift from competition to collaboration in our relationships, especially when social media makes comparison so tempting. Your community network is probably more abundant than you realize, and it's time to tend to it with the same energy you give everything else in your life.
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186 The Truth About Truth: Stop Being Manipulated by Information
SayTheThings's podcast
In a world where we're constantly fed opinions disguised as facts, I'm sharing the three simple questions that transformed how I process information. We'll explore why being "nice" sometimes means having uncomfortable conversations about truth, and how to navigate conflicting information without losing your sanity. I challenge you to apply these questions to something you encounter this week – because the truth doesn't change according to our ability to stomach it.
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185: The Energy You Bring
SayTheThings's podcast
I took an extended summer break and found myself not in the right headspace to return, which got me thinking about the energy we bring into the world. With all the negativity and chaos happening around us—from political unrest to violence—I want to ask: what energy are you contributing? I believe we are literally energetic beings operating at measurable frequencies, and there's science behind how our physical and emotional states affect not just us, but everyone around us. This week, I'm challenging you to pick one thing—whether it's starting a gratitude practice, getting moving outside,...
info_outlineI'm kicking off a new series about letting go to uncover who we really are, inspired by John Acuff's Greatest Year Ever course. Just like the trees in fall draw their energy inward and release what no longer serves them, we need to learn to bring our energy back inside and use it with wisdom—not to meet everyone else's needs, but to sustain a healthy life. I've been questioning how our generation fell into the trap of doing all the things for all the people, treating ourselves like machines instead of humans who need rest and restoration. This week, I'm asking you to simply notice what needs to fall away in your life—the commitments, expectations, and beliefs about who you should be that no longer serve the woman you're becoming.
https://www.instagram.com/nicole_bachle