Can You Write to Your Ex’s Lawyer? Family Law Tips for Self-Represented People
Release Date: 07/02/2025
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info_outlineListen to This Episode If You:
✉️ You’re self-represented in your family law matter
🤯 You’re feeling overwhelmed trying to respond to legal letters
⚖️ You’re unsure of your rights when communicating without a lawyer
📬 You need tips for writing clear, respectful, and protective responses
🚨 You’ve been told you must respond but don’t know where to start
🧾 You want to avoid common traps and stay legally safe
📌 Legal Disclaimer: This is a general discussion and not legal advice. Please see a qualified lawyer for advice specific to your situation.
Episode Summary:
Can you write to your ex’s lawyer if you don’t have one yourself? What are the legal and strategic risks—and how can you protect yourself?
In this essential episode, we break down how to navigate communication in your family law matter when you’re self-represented. From tone and structure to legal obligations and emotional traps, we cover everything you need to know to respond with confidence and protect your position.
We also talk about when not to respond, what the Family Law Rules say about unrepresented parties, and what to do if the other side’s lawyer refuses to deal with you directly. If you’re facing legal letters, emotional pressure, or confusion about your next step—this episode is your guide.
⏱️ Episode Timeline – What We Discuss:
00:00 Introduction: Responding to Your Ex's Lawyer
01:45 Understanding the Stress of Legal Letters
04:13 What are the Rules for Communicating with Your Ex's Lawyer
06:31 Best Practices for Writing Legal Letters
15:43 Common Tactics in Family Lawyer Letters and How to Handle Them
19:42 Guidelines for Self-Represented Individuals in Family Law and Divorce
24:54 Handling Lawyer-Guided Mediation
25:16 When to Seek Legal Advice
25:43 Responding to Offers and Legal Letters in your Divorce
27:44 Managing Emotional Reactions in your Divorce
29:27 Timing and Professionalism in Legal Responses
31:44 Disagreeing Professionally in a letter to a family lawyer
36:26 Avoidant Personality Tips in Divorce Communication
38:02 High Conflict Personality Tips in Divorce Communication
39:36 Manipulative and Controlling Personality Tips in Divorce Communication
41:34 Amicable Personality Tips in Divorce Communication
45:17 Final Tips for Self-Represented Litigants
Resources
Case N Johnson (Appellant/Husband) and M L Johnson (Cross-Appellant/Wife) [1997] FamCA 32 (7 July 1997)
https://www.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FamCA/1997/32.html?query=
RE: F Litigants in Person Guidelines [2001] FamCA 348 (4 June 2001)
http://www6.austlii.edu.au/cgi-bin/viewdoc/au/cases/cth/FamCA/2001/348.html?query=
102na Information https://www.fcfcoa.gov.au/fl/pubs/fv-info-sheet
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