Aura, Pillar 3: Calm “The Container” - Why Leadership Presence Starts With What You Can Hold | Edge of the Napkin #23
Paper Napkin Wisdom
In the last few Edge of the Napkin episodes, we’ve been building something deliberately. Not a formula. Not a personality profile. Not another leadership “style.” We’ve been unpacking something more fundamental—what I’ve been calling the Magnetic Growth Aura. An Aura isn’t what you say. It isn’t your title. It isn’t even your expertise. It’s what people experience when they’re around you. And...
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Keep Your Commitment to Yourself | Edgar Jones – Speaker and Coach, Former NFL Linebacker
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Some wisdom doesn’t shout. It waits. It waits patiently until you’re ready to stop running… until you’re willing to turn around… until facing it finally becomes worth it to you. That’s exactly what Edgar Jones brought to the Paper Napkin Wisdom table. On his napkin, Edgar wrote: “Keep your commitment to yourself!!! You will face it when it’s worth it to you.” At first glance, it feels simple. But as you’ll hear in this conversation, that...
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Aura, Pillar Two: Congruence - Say What You Do. Do What You Say. | Edge of the Napkin #22
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Some leadership traits are easy to spot. Confidence shows up quickly. Calm is noticeable under pressure. Contribution is visible in results. Congruence is different. You don’t always notice it when it’s present — but you always feel it when it’s missing. In Episode 334 of the Paper Napkin Wisdom Podcast, and #22 in the Edge of the Napkin series, Govindh Jayaraman explores the second pillar of the Magnetic Growth Aura: Congruence — the quiet discipline that makes...
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One Ripple Can Change the Tide - Leaders Create Them | Sabine Hutchinson Author, Founder
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Introduction: The Power of a Small Stone Sabine Hutchison has lived a life shaped not by grand plans, but by small, courageous moments — moments where she spoke an idea out loud, asked for help, or chose possibility over certainty. Sabine is the author of Beyond the Ladder, the founder of the Ripple Network, and a longtime leader working at the intersection of science, leadership, and advocacy for women. Born in the U.S. to a German mother, her life has unfolded across countries, industries, and identities — from chemistry labs to the world tour of...
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Aura, Pillar One: Confidence - Why Pushing Harder Isn’t Leadership (And What Is) Edge of the Napkin Series — Episode 21
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Introduction: When Confidence Quietly Turns Into Pressure Most leaders I work with don’t lack confidence. They’re capable. They’ve proven themselves. They’ve built something real. And yet… there’s a familiar pattern I see again and again. When the outcome isn’t coming, they don’t pause. They push. They work longer hours. They inject more of themselves into the system. They become more present in every decision. They try to force...
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Always Look for a Glimmer of Light | With Denise Cesare, Founder, Author
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Introduction: When the Light Is Almost Invisible Denise Cesare didn’t bring a complicated napkin. She didn’t bring a framework. Or a system. Or a clever phrase designed to sound insightful. She brought a sentence that could only come from lived experience: “Always look for a glimmer of light.” At first glance, it feels gentle. Comforting. Almost obvious. But as this conversation unfolds, you realize this isn’t encouragement spoken from the sidelines. It’s a survival...
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Build Your Growth Aura - How Leaders Attract Momentum and Gravity - Edge of the Napkin #20
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Introduction: When Effort Isn’t the Problem There comes a point in leadership where doing more stops working. You’re focused. You’re aligned. You’re taking action. And yet—momentum feels heavier than it should. Trust takes longer to build. Progress happens, but it doesn’t compound. This episode lives in that space. Not to offer another tactic or system, but to explore something quieter and more foundational: why some leaders seem to carry gravity, while others—with...
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Help Me See What You See - With Susan Asiyanbi Founder and CEO Olori Network
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Introduction: Seeing Beyond What We See Susan Asiyanbi is one of only two guests in the history of Paper Napkin Wisdom to draw eyes on a napkin. Not symbols. Not words alone. Eyes — complete with lashes — and a simple phrase beneath them: “Help me see what you see.” At first glance, it feels poetic. But as this conversation unfolds, you realize it’s not poetic at all. It’s practical. It’s disciplined. And it may be one of the most underutilized leadership skills...
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One Punch. One Practice. One Shift. Why Mastery Beats Momentum in Leadership
Paper Napkin Wisdom
We are drowning in leadership wisdom. Quotes. Frameworks. Podcasts. Books. Slides. Ideas stacked on top of ideas — each one sounding right, useful, even necessary. And yet, if we’re honest, something feels off. We’ve never known more about leadership… and rarely have we lived less of it. This isn’t a crisis of information. It’s a crisis of integration. We confuse motion with progress. Exposure with understanding. Volume with mastery. And nowhere is...
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If It’s Not a Hell Yes, It’s an Easy No | Guest: Liza Roeser Founder, CEO of Fifty Flowers
Paper Napkin Wisdom
Some ideas don’t need to be polished. They don’t need to be optimized. They don’t need a strategy deck or a five-year plan. They just need to be true. When Liza Roeser wrote her napkin for this conversation, she didn’t overthink it. She didn’t hedge it. She didn’t soften it. She wrote: If it’s not a Hell Yes, it’s an easy No. At first glance, it sounds obvious. Almost too simple. But...
info_outlineThere are times in life when wisdom doesn’t show up quietly. It doesn’t whisper. It doesn’t tap you gently on the shoulder. Sometimes it arrives like a jolt — like your heart recognizing something before your brain can process it. That’s how this episode began.
If you’ve been following along, you know it’s been a hard season in our home. Stacey’s father — my father-in-law — has been moving through the final stages of his cancer journey. And while there is an entire conversation to be had about the health, the living, and the complexity of that experience… this message isn’t about that part.
This one is about emotion.
The kind that sits heavy and deep.
The kind that reshapes you quietly.
It started with a simple clip of Steve Harvey telling a story about his dad. In it, he said something that froze me in place:
“Your father is the only man who truly wants you to be better than him. The only one who can say ‘I’m proud of you’ without competition.”
And as he said it, he broke — emotionally — because when his father died, he knew he’d never hear those words again.
That landed in me with a weight I wasn’t expecting. Not because of loss. Not because of fear.
But because of truth.
Over the last few months, I’ve been having deep conversations about masculinity — real masculinity. Not the loud, performative kind. Not the kind wrapped in bravado or posturing. I’m talking about the lived kind. The grounded kind. The kind that holds space for vulnerability, accountability, tenderness, and strength all at once.
And I’ve been doing this in community with other men — real, honest conversations where ego takes a back seat and presence takes the lead.
So when I heard Harvey’s words… they sparked something.
Because I’m lucky.
I have a father who calls me to remind me of who I can be.
A father who tells me he’s proud.
A father who truly wants me to be better than he was.
That is a rare gift. One I don’t take lightly.
And then it hit me — I feel the exact same way about my children.
I want my sons to be better than me.
I want my daughter to be better than me.
Not in the way the world measures “better,” but in depth of character, in presence, in courage, in self-trust.
And it goes further still:
I realized I want this for my friends too.
Not just that they succeed…
but that they surpass their own expectations.
That they rise higher.
That they win.
That they become the absolute best versions of themselves.
It’s strange to say this out loud, because men aren’t really taught to cheer for each other that way.
We’re taught competition, comparison, stoicism, silence.
But silence has been doing a lot of damage.
So a few weeks ago, I made a small — but life-shifting — decision:
I would no longer be the silent man in the corner.
I would be the active one.
The one who sends the message.
The one who checks in.
The one who says the thing out loud instead of assuming they know.
The one who tells his friends he’s proud of them.
The one who reminds them they matter.
Every week now, I’ve been sending short notes to the men in my life. Notes like:
“I believe in you.”
“I’m proud of you.”
“You’re doing better than you think.”
“You matter to me.”
And the responses reveal something profound:
Men don’t hear this often.
Sometimes not at all.
In a world full of noise, what’s missing is something incredibly simple — active encouragement.
Not advice. Not fixing. Not lecturing.
Encouragement.
And in the middle of all this reflection — the emotional weight of watching my father-in-law’s final chapter, the Steve Harvey moment, the conversations with other men — a parable emerged.
THE CORNERMAN — A PARABLE
There was once a young fighter named Sam. Talented. Strong. Smart. But he couldn’t win.
Not once.
Every fight ended the same way. He’d enter the ring hopeful… and leave defeated.
After one especially tough loss, Sam sat in the change room, crushed. A retired fighter — an older man sweeping the hallway — wandered in and said, “Rough night.”
Sam nodded.
“You’ve got talent,” the man said, “but that’s not your problem.”
Sam looked up.
“Kid… you’re losing because you don’t have a corner.”
Sam frowned. His coach was right there.
But the old man shook his head.
“I didn’t say a coach. I said a corner.
A corner is the place you go when you’re hurt.
The place where someone wipes the blood from your face.
Where no one judges you.
Where someone speaks truth into you, not doubt.
A fighter without a corner doesn’t lose because he’s weak…
He loses because he’s alone.”
That one idea changed Sam’s entire career — and his life.
He didn’t just learn how to fight.
He learned what it means to be supported.
And eventually, he became that man for others.
Because we all need someone in our corner.
And we all have the ability — and responsibility — to be a corner for someone else.
5 KEY TAKEAWAYS (For Entrepreneurs & Leaders)
1. Encouragement Is a Leadership Skill
Most leaders underestimate the power of saying, “I’m proud of you.”
Encouragement is not soft — it is strategic.
Take Action:
This week, tell one person on your team something specific you’re proud of. Name it. Say it.
2. Don’t Wait for People to Ask
Most people won’t ask for support.
Initiation is what separates real leadership from passive friendship.
Take Action:
Send one check-in message today without being prompted.
3. Men Need Active Support, Not Silent Approval
Silence leaves too much room for doubt.
Active encouragement builds identity and confidence.
Take Action:
Choose one man in your life and tell him something you admire about him.
4. Strength Isn’t Stoicism — It’s Presence
Real masculinity isn’t about withholding emotion; it’s about holding space.
Take Action:
Practice one moment of emotional presence today — with your partner, a friend, or your child.
5. Become the Corner You Needed
We all needed someone at some point.
Leadership is becoming that person for the next generation.
Take Action:
Make encouraging one person per week a non-negotiable ritual.
THE NAPKIN IDEA
If everything in this message could fit on one napkin, it would say:
“Be the man in someone’s corner.”
(Say it out loud.)
Because no one wins alone.
And the man who shows up for others becomes a man others trust, follow, and grow because of.
CALL TO ACTION
I want you to take this idea and make it real.
Write down the name of one person — just one — who needs to hear something today.
Then write your message on a paper napkin (yes, literally).
Take a photo.
Post it.
Tag it with #PaperNapkinWisdom.
Let’s normalize active encouragement.
Let’s show the world what leadership looks like in real life.
🌐 Website
www.papernapkinwisdom.com
▶️ YouTube Channel
https://www.youtube.com/@papernapkinwisdom
🎧 Podcast Links
Apple Podcasts:
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/paper-napkin-wisdom/id735345903