233: Kindness

One tool I think God uses to develop kindness in our character is to sometimes bring irritable, grumpy people into our lives as a mirror to show us our own crabby nature. At the same time, he’ll round off our rough edges by having kind people cross our path to show us who we could become. I have a story that illustrates the point in today’s episode. I’m pretty sure you’re going to like this one.

But first, I’m John Certalic, and you are listening to episode 233 of You Were Made for This, the podcast about enriching our lives by reflecting the character, image, and likeness of God in our relationships. It’s what we were made for. We were made for this.

Irritations that started the day

It was a hot, hot July afternoon when I went to a doctor’s appointment

 on the other side of town. In 2017 I was diagnosed with sleep apnea, and once a year I’m supposed to see my sleep doctor so he can evaluate the data recorded on my CPAP machine and make any changes to the settings if needed.

Nothing ever changes when I’ve seen him in the past, so these appointments seem like a waste of time to me. It’s why I pushed my annual visit back to three years.

I had woken up on the wrong side of the bed the morning of my appointment. There were lots of things I wanted to get done, and this doctor’s appointment was a minor and annoying interruption to my plans for the day.

Added to this is the fact I don’t do well in the extreme July heat, so I was especially grumpy. My friends in Arizona tell me that in their summer heat they can get grumpy too, but it’s a dry kind of grumpiness, so it’s more bearable.

Also, if it weren’t for my tall height, I would be an ideal character out of Central Casting for the role of Grumpy in Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs.

As I opened the door of the medical building of my doctor’s office I wished I had worn my parka. It was that cold. It was something else to be irritated about. You could have hung sides of beef in the hallway.

But something changed when I checked in with the receptionist. 

A smile and a cup of water

She was a pleasant woman in her early 50s with blond hair. dressed in blue scrubs. She greeted me with a wide smile and offered me a styrofoam cup of cold water with a straw stuck through its lid. I appreciated her kindness, but declined her offer. It occurred to me that the water could easily turn to ice while waiting for the doctor, and then what was I going to do with a cup of ice in my hand?

I sat down in the waiting room and noticed my spirits gradually started to lift. Within a few minutes the receptionist came out from behind her desk, and with that same pleasing smile said, “Please follow me. The doctor is ready to see you now. And how are you doing today, by the way? Is it still so hot out there?”

Her soft demeanor made me forget the heat outside and the cold inside. It calmed my heart to be attended to by someone clothed in kindness, like the Bible talks about in the Book of Colossians. 

The doctor himself exuded kindness. He told me the numbers on my CPAP machine were great and no adjustments were needed. “Keep doing what you are doing and I’ll see you in a year.”  Yeah, I like this guy. He’s so calm and mild -mannered. He seems to enjoy what he’s doing, so I will be back.

He showed me the way back to the waiting room, and as I passed the receptionist’s desk she once again offered me that same styrofoam cup of water. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to take it with you? It’s important to stay hydrated in weather like this. “

Kindness received

I paused for a moment, still not thirsty, then said, “Sure. Thank you. I will take it with me.” 

I did so because I thought it would brighten her day. Her eyes widened as did her smile. “Good choice,” she said.

I almost replied with, “Thanks. Mom.” Her kindness brought out the best in me at that moment.

We exchanged smiles when I noticed her gold cross jewelry around her neck. Hmm. I wondered it there was a connection between her kindness and her necklace, but I let it go. I need to be more like her, I thought. Life is too short to be as irritable as I was. Give people a styrofoam cup of water with a plastic straw through the lid. It will make both you and them feel good. Simple acts of kindness do that, you know.

Surprised at how good I now felt, I left for home, but stopped at Chick-fil-A on the way. That’s when everything changed again.

As I pulled into the drive-thru lane I was met by a woman in her mid-twenties, decked out in company-issue red shirt and gray slacks to take my order. Clearly irritated about something, her disposition was worse than my mood that started my day. No smile, impatient with my order, eyes rolling, gruff voice. Next to the word “grumpy” in the dictionary is her photo.

In her defense though, it was blazing hot, even in the shade next to the drive-thru lane. But still, I felt like I should have apologized for being her customer. It was not her pleasure to take my order, that’s for sure.

An embarrassing realization

Her mood turned the clock back to my own crabby temperament earlier in the day. The kindness I just experienced from the receptionist  at the doctor’s office was a distant memory. Her irritability was a curtain call that invited my pwn crabbiness to return for a final bow.

What gives, I thought on my way home? This woman was so unlike every other experience I’ve had at Chick-fil-A.

Then it struck me.

Earlier in the day I was just like that crabby order taker. My irritable mood at the time had the potential to put others in a bad mood like herd did for me. I was creating relational climate change that adversely affects others.It was an inconvenient truth I had to face.

Then I thought, “I wonder if this irritable Chick-fil-A order taker was really an angel sent by God to gently teach me about the effect my disposition has on others.

It seemed as if God was holding her up as a mirror to show me how my grouchy mood could bother people, while at the same time showing me how I can improve the relational climate for people around me by extending simple acts of kindness as the receptionist did at the doctor’s office.

Pretty wise of God, I thought. I got his message.

What does all this mean for YOU? 

What about you? I wonder if you’re seeing any angels acting as a mirror to help you become more like the person he created you to be

Closing

Well, that’s it for today., I hope your thinking was stimulated by today’s show, to make the world a better place by showing a little kindness every now and then.

For when you do, it will help you experience the joy of being the person you were created to be, a person who reflects the kindness of God. You Were Made for this, you know.

Finally, as I often say at the end of each show, remember to spread a little relational sunshine around the people you meet this week. Spark some joy for them.  And I’ll see you again next time. Goodbye for now.

Prior recent episode

332: Who Can I Trust?

All past and future episodes can be found at JohnCertalic.com