Grieve That Sh!t

Grieve That Shit isn’t here to comfort you with clichés or tidy slogans about “better places.” This podcast digs straight into the wreckage of loss—the nights you can’t breathe, the mornings you can’t move, and the ache that takes over your whole body. Hosted by grief specialist Sharon Brubaker, it’s an unfiltered look at what grief actually does to you and how to face it head-on. Sharon brings her own story, real conversations, and practical tools that cut through the noise. If you’re done with people minimizing your pain and you want the truth about grief, this is it. Grieve That Shit is where the rawness lives—and where real healing begins.

The Grief Lies We Keep Believing 06/12/2026

The Grief Lies We Keep Believing Episode Description “Time doesn't heal grief. It just passes.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, takes on some of the biggest grief myths we've all heard—and tells the truth about why they're keeping grievers stuck. "Just give it time." "Grief comes in waves." "You're never supposed to let go of the pain." "Grief is a roller coaster." We hear these phrases all the time. They're repeated at funerals, shared by friends, posted online, and passed from one griever to another. But are they actually helping? Or are they keeping people trapped in survival mode? In this powerful episode, Sharon breaks down the hidden messages behind common grief advice and explains why healing requires more than simply waiting for time to pass. She explores why so many grievers believe holding onto pain is the same as holding onto their person, why grief keeps showing up in waves, and what it really means to process loss instead of avoiding it. This episode is a reminder that grief is not something time fixes. It's something we learn to move through. Because healing doesn't happen by accident. It happens when we stop waiting and start doing the work. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why "just give it time" is some of the most misunderstood grief advice What time actually does—and doesn't do—for grief Why looking better is not the same as healing The truth about holding onto pain after loss Why many grievers fear letting go of their suffering What it means when grief comes in waves The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why grief feels like a roller coaster—and how to step off How unprocessed grief continues to resurface Why healing requires action, not just time Questions to Sit With After Listening What am I waiting for time to fix? Am I healing my grief or simply learning how to hide it? What pain am I afraid to let go of? What emotions keep showing up over and over again? What would change if I stopped waiting and started processing? Homework for You Take out a piece of paper and answer this question: "What am I hoping time will do for me?" Write down every answer that comes up. Then ask yourself: "What if time isn't the thing that's supposed to heal this?" Because healing doesn't happen because enough days pass. Healing happens when you become willing to face the pain that's asking for your attention. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join Processing the Pain of Grief 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com Because time is not coming to save you. But that doesn't mean you're stuck. It means the power to heal has been inside you all along. And there is a way forward. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41621860

The Grief You Didn't Know You Were Carrying with Elizabeth Part 1 06/05/2026

The Grief You Didn't Know You Were Carrying with Elizabeth Part 1 Episode Description “What if the thing you've been carrying for years is actually grief?” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with grief graduate and friend Elizabeth Keene to talk about a truth that changes everything: Not all grief comes from death. Sometimes grief comes from childhood wounds. Broken relationships. Disappointments. Rejection. Life experiences that never got processed. And years later, you're still carrying them around without realizing it. Elizabeth shares how she stumbled into Sharon's TikTok live completely by accident, asking a simple question about whether a romantic breakup could be considered grief. That question led her into grief work that uncovered more than twenty years of unresolved pain she didn't even know she was carrying. Together, Sharon and Elizabeth discuss the surprising ways grief shows up in everyday life, why so many people stay stuck in old pain, and what happens when you finally stop trying to "get over it" and learn how to process it instead. Elizabeth also shares the moment she experienced a physical release after doing grief work for the first time, how understanding the difference between thoughts and emotions changed everything, and why healing is possible even when you've spent decades believing it isn't. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief is bigger than death. And sometimes the healing you're searching for begins when you finally call it what it is. Grief. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why grief is about far more than death How unresolved life experiences continue affecting us for decades The 47+ different losses that can create grief Why people stay stuck even when they desperately want to move forward The difference between thoughts, stories, and emotions How grief work creates emotional and physical healing Why "just get over it" never works What happens when you finally process old pain How grief affects relationships, identity, and daily life Why healing doesn't erase your past—it changes your relationship with it Questions to Sit With After Listening What experiences from my past still carry emotional weight today? What pain have I been calling something else instead of grief? Have I been trying to think my way out of emotions? What losses have I never fully acknowledged? What would be possible if I finally put down the emotional weight I've been carrying? Homework for You Take out a notebook and create a timeline of your life. Start with your earliest memories and write down every event, relationship, disappointment, heartbreak, transition, or loss that affected you emotionally. Don't judge it. Don't minimize it. Just write it down. Then ask yourself: "What part of this might actually be grief?" Because healing often starts when we stop dismissing our experiences and start telling the truth about them. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com Because grief is not just about who died. It's about every experience that left a mark on your heart. And healing begins when you finally stop carrying it alone. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41550480

The Grief You Didn't Know You Were Carrying with Elizabeth Part 2 06/05/2026

The Grief You Didn't Know You Were Carrying with Elizabeth Part 2 Episode Description “Healing didn't just change her life. It changed her purpose.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker sits down again with Elizabeth Keene for Part 2 of their powerful conversation about grief, healing, and what happens when you finally stop surviving and start living. After doing her own grief work, Elizabeth experienced something she never expected. She didn't just heal. She found her calling. What started as a random TikTok scroll turned into a journey that transformed how she sees herself, other people, and the entire world. Now, after working through decades of unresolved grief, Elizabeth is becoming a certified grief specialist to help others navigate the pain she knows so well. Together, Sharon and Elizabeth dive into the reality that every person you meet is carrying a broken heart somewhere. They discuss why grief is not a life sentence, how emotional pain accumulates over time, and why so many people remain stuck in survival mode for years—or even decades. Elizabeth shares the moment she realized her own pain could become a pathway to helping others heal, the surprising connection between grief and trauma, and why doing grief work gave her something no amount of therapy, self-help, or distraction ever could: Peace. This episode is also a powerful conversation about purpose. Because sometimes the thing that breaks your heart becomes the very thing that teaches you how to help someone else heal theirs. And sometimes your greatest pain becomes your greatest gift. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why everyone is a griever The difference between carrying pain and processing it How grief accumulates throughout a lifetime Why grief is often connected to trauma and survival responses What happens when you stop avoiding emotional pain Why healing doesn't erase your story How grief work creates more peace, joy, and emotional freedom The role grief plays in purpose and personal growth Why people stay stuck in grief for decades How healing changes the way you show up for others Questions to Sit With After Listening What pain have I been carrying longer than I realize? Am I surviving my life or fully living it? What losses have shaped the person I am today? What would my life look like if I stopped carrying the emotional weight? Could my healing help someone else someday? Homework for You Write down this question: “What pain am I still carrying that no longer belongs in my backpack?” Then make a list. Don't judge it. Don't rank it. Don't minimize it. Just tell the truth. Because every unresolved hurt takes up space. And healing begins when you're willing to look at what you've been carrying. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com Because grief is not the end of your story. It's often the beginning of the chapter where you finally learn how to live again. And when you heal your own heart, you become a safer place for someone else's. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41550575

The Grief Lesson Nobody Taught Us 05/29/2026

The Grief Lesson Nobody Taught Us Episode Description “Your kids are already grieving. The question is whether they know how.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, tackles one of the hardest parts of loss for parents: helping children grieve while you're grieving too. Because most parents believe their job is to protect their children from pain. But grief doesn't work that way. Children feel everything. They feel the tension. They feel the sadness. They feel the fear. They notice the silence. They notice the tears you hide. And when we avoid talking about grief, soften the truth, or pretend we're okay, they don't feel protected. They feel confused. In this powerful episode, Sharon explains why children do not need perfect answers. They need honest ones. They need to see what grief looks like. They need to learn that pain is something you move through, not something you avoid. Sharon shares why so many parents rush to fix, distract, or protect their children from grief, and how that often comes from their own fear of facing the pain. She also shares a deeply personal story about losing her favorite aunt at sixteen years old and how being left to figure grief out alone shaped her understanding of loss. This episode is a reminder that your children are watching. Not your words. Your grief. Because whether we realize it or not, we are teaching our children how to grieve every single day. And if we don't teach them? They'll end up where most of us did. Trying to figure it out alone. What You'll Learn in This Episode Why children experience grief differently than adults The truth about trying to protect kids from pain Why silence creates confusion during grief How children learn grief by watching the adults around them The difference between protecting your child and interrupting their grief Why honesty builds trust during loss Common mistakes parents make when talking about death How your own grief work helps your children heal Why children need presence more than perfect answers Questions to Sit With After Listening What emotions does my child's grief bring up in me? Am I protecting my child from pain... or protecting myself from watching it? What messages did I learn about grief growing up? How am I modeling grief for my children right now? What would change if I stopped pretending I was okay? Homework for You Take a piece of paper and write this question at the top: “What did I learn about grief growing up?” Then answer honestly. What did the adults around you teach you? Did they talk about grief? Did they hide it? Did they cry? Did they tell the truth? Because before we can teach our children how to grieve... We have to understand what we learned about grief ourselves. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com Because your child does not need a perfect parent. They need a grieving parent willing to tell the truth. And sometimes the greatest gift we can give our children is showing them that pain is not something to fear. It's something we learn to move through. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41464410

Why Grief Feels So Out of Control 05/22/2026

Why Grief Feels So Out of Control Episode Description “What you thought grief was… it isn’t.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real definition of grief and why so many grievers feel overwhelmed, exhausted, numb, angry, and emotionally out of control after loss. Because nobody taught us what grief actually is. We were taught how to survive it. Stay strong. Stay busy. Push it down. Keep going. Humans really decided emotional pain should be ignored until it starts leaking out sideways into every relationship. Strange little system. But grief is not just sadness. It is emotional, mental, physical, and deeply connected to the body. It affects your brain, nervous system, thoughts, emotions, and reactions. In this episode, Sharon talks about the brain fog, exhaustion, chest tightness, numbness, anger out of nowhere, and the feeling that your whole life split in half after loss. She also explains why grief itself is not the problem. The problem is resisting it, avoiding it, distracting yourself from it, and pretending it is not there. Because unprocessed grief does not disappear. It waits. It builds. And eventually it starts showing up in every part of your life. This episode is also a powerful teaching on what it actually means to process grief. Not just talking about it, but learning how to lean into the pain long enough for your body to move through it. Because your body already knows how to grieve. It was designed to. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grief is more than sadness What a full-body grief experience looks like Why grief causes brain fog, exhaustion, and numbness The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why avoiding grief keeps people stuck What it actually means to process grief How unprocessed grief starts showing up in daily life Questions to Sit With After Listening What was I taught grief should look like? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or surviving it? Where is grief showing up in my body right now? Homework for You Write this question at the top of a page: “What was I taught to do with grief?” Then answer honestly. Because most people were never taught how to process grief. They were taught how to hide it. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: griefdiscovery.com Because healing starts when you stop resisting the pain and finally understand what grief is actually doing inside of you. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41399045

Why You Feel Exhausted, Numb, and Out of Control 05/15/2026

Why You Feel Exhausted, Numb, and Out of Control Episode Description “What you thought grief was… it isn’t.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real definition of grief and why so many grievers feel overwhelmed, exhausted, numb, angry, and emotionally out of control after loss. Because nobody taught us what grief actually is. We were taught how to survive it. Stay strong. Stay busy. Push it down. Keep going. Humans really decided emotional pain should be ignored until it starts leaking out sideways into every relationship. Strange little system. But grief is not just sadness. It is emotional, mental, physical, and deeply connected to the body. It affects your brain, nervous system, thoughts, emotions, and reactions. In this episode, Sharon talks about the brain fog, exhaustion, chest tightness, numbness, anger out of nowhere, and the feeling that your whole life split in half after loss. She also explains why grief itself is not the problem. The problem is resisting it, avoiding it, distracting yourself from it, and pretending it is not there. Because unprocessed grief does not disappear. It waits. It builds. And eventually it starts showing up in every part of your life. This episode is also a powerful teaching on what it actually means to process grief. Not just talking about it, but learning how to lean into the pain long enough for your body to move through it. Because your body already knows how to grieve. It was designed to. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grief is more than sadness What a full-body grief experience looks like Why grief causes brain fog, exhaustion, and numbness The difference between surviving grief and processing grief Why avoiding grief keeps people stuck What it actually means to process grief How unprocessed grief starts showing up in daily life Questions to Sit With After Listening What was I taught grief should look like? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or surviving it? Where is grief showing up in my body right now? Homework for You Write this question at the top of a page: “What was I taught to do with grief?” Then answer honestly. Because most people were never taught how to process grief. They were taught how to hide it. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes of Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: Because healing starts when you stop resisting the pain and finally understand what grief is actually doing inside of you. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41309500

The Truth About Why Grief Feels So Heavy 05/08/2026

The Truth About Why Grief Feels So Heavy Episode Description “Your life isn’t broken. Your heart is.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down why so many grievers stay stuck in pain for years… even while trying everything they can to survive it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon realized the problem wasn’t that grievers were weak. The problem was that nobody taught us how to grieve. So we stay busy. We avoid the pain. We push it down. And we keep trying to “get over” something our body is still trying to process. In this episode, Sharon explains the real work of grief. Not just talking about it. Not pretending you’re okay. But understanding what grief actually is, why your body reacts the way it does, and what it means to truly process pain instead of carrying it forever. She also talks about “completion”, the unfinished conversations, emotions, and words that stay trapped inside the body after loss. The things you still need to say. The anger. The guilt. The love. The goodbye you never got. Because undelivered emotions do not disappear. This conversation is not about “moving on.” It’s about finally understanding what grief is trying to do inside you… so you can stop fighting yourself. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grief feels like a full-body experience The difference between surviving grief and processing it Why staying busy keeps grief stuck What “completion” actually means in grief How unfinished emotions stay trapped in the body Why avoiding grief makes it louder over time How to separate love from pain Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What have I still not said? What emotions have I been trying to avoid? Am I processing my grief… or just surviving it? What pain am I still carrying that was never expressed? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What is still left unsaid?” Then let yourself answer honestly. Not the polite version. Not the strong version. The real one. Because grief doesn’t stay stuck because you loved too much. It stays stuck when everything inside you goes unspoken. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it’s because something inside you is ready to stop surviving and start understanding your grief. You don’t have to carry this alone. 👉 Join The Story Room 👉 Listen to more episodes on Grieve That Sh!t 👉 Learn more at: Because healing starts when you stop running from the pain and finally learn how to move through it. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41217135

No One Taught You How to Grieve And Why That’s a Problem 05/01/2026

No One Taught You How to Grieve And Why That’s a Problem Episode Description “You’re not broken. You’re trying to heal something you don’t even understand.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down the real reason so many people feel stuck in their grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn’t just about loss. It’s about what happens when you’re left trying to survive something no one ever taught you how to process. No one gave you the language. No one gave you the instructions. And now you’re trying to figure it out while you’re in it. In this episode, Sharon walks through why grief feels so overwhelming, how misinformation and avoidance keep it stuck, and why staying busy, pushing it down, or trying to “get over it” only makes it louder over time. She also explains how grief actually works in your body and mind, why the pain keeps coming back, and what it really takes to move through it. This conversation is not about doing grief perfectly. It’s about understanding it. Because when you understand your grief, you stop fighting yourself. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why you feel stuck in your grief How lack of understanding keeps grief from moving Why staying busy and avoiding emotions makes it worse How grief shows up in your body, thoughts, and identity The difference between surviving and actually healing Why grief keeps coming back stronger when it’s not processed Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Do I actually understand what grief is… or am I guessing? Am I trying to survive this… or actually heal it? What have I been doing to avoid feeling my grief? Where am I fighting against something I don’t understand? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What do I not understand about my grief?” Then answer honestly. Not what you’ve heard. Not what sounds right. The truth. Because you cannot move something you don’t understand. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it’s because something in you is ready to stop guessing and start understanding your grief. You don’t have to stay stuck here. 👉 Learn more: Because healing doesn’t happen by accident. It happens when you finally understand what you’re going through. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41116715

Stop Trying to Protect Your Child from Grief 04/24/2026

Stop Trying to Protect Your Child from Grief Episode Description “Your child doesn’t need the pain removed. They need you to help them move through it.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down one of the biggest mistakes parents make when their child is grieving. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn’t something you can protect someone from. Especially not your child. Because your kids already feel everything. They feel your silence. They feel your sadness. They feel what’s not being said. They just don’t have the words for it. In this episode, Sharon walks through what actually happens when parents try to shield their children from grief, why that instinct makes sense, and how it unintentionally creates confusion, fear, and isolation. She also explains what children really need, how to talk to them about loss, and why your own grief work is the most powerful tool you have to help them. This conversation is not about being a perfect parent. It’s about telling the truth. Because your child is not learning from what you say. They’re learning from what you show. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why children feel everything, even when they can’t express it What happens when you try to protect them from grief Why avoiding the truth creates confusion instead of comfort How children process grief differently from adults Why your own grief work matters more than what you say How to talk to your child about death in a way they can understand Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What am I trying to protect my child from? Am I avoiding their grief… or my own? What emotions from my child are hardest for me to sit with? What did I learn about grief growing up… and how is that showing up now? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What am I trying to protect my child from?” Then answer honestly. Not the version that sounds like you’re doing it right. The real one. Because clarity is what builds trust. And trust is what makes grief safer. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it’s because something in you is ready to stop avoiding and start understanding grief, for you and your child. You don’t have to figure this out alone. 👉 Join the masterclass: Because your child doesn’t need perfection. They need you. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/41003655

The First Year of Grief Is Where Most People Get It Wrong 04/17/2026

The First Year of Grief Is Where Most People Get It Wrong Episode Description “Grief is already painful. But the way you’re trying to survive it might be making it harder.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down what most people unknowingly do in the first year of grief that increases their suffering. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about loss. It is about what happens when you’re left trying to survive something no one ever taught you how to process. The first year is the most confusing. The most painful. And the year you get the worst advice. Stay strong. Keep busy. Don’t think about it. But these strategies do not heal grief. They delay it. In this episode, Sharon walks through four common patterns that make grief heavier: avoiding your emotions, pretending you’re okay, comparing your timeline to others, and staying busy to escape the pain. She explains why these responses make sense, why your brain uses them to protect you, and why they end up keeping grief stuck and louder over time. This conversation is not about doing grief perfectly. It is about becoming aware of what is actually happening. Because you are not doing it wrong. You were just never taught how to do it at all. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why the first year of grief feels the hardest How avoiding emotions actually increases suffering Why pretending you’re okay creates isolation The danger of comparing your grief to others How staying busy keeps grief from being processed Why your reactions make sense (even if they’re not helping) Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What emotions have I been avoiding since the loss? Where am I pretending I’m okay when I’m not? Have I been comparing my grief to someone else’s timeline? When do I actually allow myself to sit with my grief? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What have I been doing to avoid my grief?” Then answer honestly. Not the strong answer. Not the version that sounds like you’re handling it well. The real one. Because awareness is where healing begins. Resources + Next Steps If this episode hit you, it’s because something in you is ready to stop avoiding and start understanding your grief. You don’t have to figure this out alone. 👉 Get the book: 👉 Join The Story Room Because healing doesn’t happen when you run from grief It happens when you finally face it. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40649280

Why Your Brain Won’t Stop Replaying the Day They Died 04/10/2026

Why Your Brain Won’t Stop Replaying the Day They Died Episode Description “Your brain is not trying to hurt you. It’s trying to understand what just changed your entire life.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down why your mind keeps replaying the moment your person died. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just emotional. It is a full body and brain experience that records life-altering moments with intense detail. The phone call. The hospital room. The last words. These moments stay vivid not because something is wrong with you, but because your brain is trying to make sense of what happened. In this episode, Sharon explains how trauma and memory work together, why your brain keeps returning to the same moment, and how shock and disbelief keep the story from fully settling. She also breaks down the connection between thoughts and emotions, why painful memories keep triggering emotional waves, and how speaking your story out loud helps the brain begin organizing the experience. This conversation is not about stopping the replay instantly. It is about understanding why it is happening. Because when you understand your grief, you stop being afraid of your own mind. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why your brain replays the moment your person died How trauma impacts memory and emotional intensity Why grief feels like a full body experience The connection between thoughts and emotional pain Why shock and disbelief keep the memory looping How talking about your story helps your brain process it Why you are not broken for thinking about it Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What moment does my mind keep going back to? What part of that story still feels unfinished or unclear? Have I been afraid of my thoughts instead of understanding them? Where can I safely begin to talk about this out loud? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “This is the moment my life changed.” Then describe it. What you saw. What you heard. What you felt. Not to relive it. But to begin organizing it. Because what your brain keeps replaying is what it is still trying to understand. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because your mind is trying to process something that has never been fully spoken. You don’t have to do that alone. 👉 Join The Story Room: Because healing begins when your story finally has a place to land. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40649170

The Stories Grievers Never Get to Tell 04/03/2026

The Stories Grievers Never Get to Tell Episode Description “The part of your grief that hurts the most is often the part you never say out loud.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, talks about the stories grievers carry but rarely share. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about missing someone. It is also about the moments that changed everything—the phone call, the hospital room, the last words, the unanswered questions. These are the parts most people don’t talk about. Not because they don’t want to. But because they don’t feel safe to. In this episode, Sharon explains why grievers stop sharing their stories, how silence builds over time, and what happens when those memories have nowhere to go. She breaks down how the brain replays painful moments, why these memories stay stuck, and why speaking them out loud is one of the most important parts of processing grief. She also introduces The Story Room, a space created for grievers to share the full truth of their experience—without judgment, interruption, or being corrected. This conversation is not about making grief smaller. It is about giving it a place to be heard. Because healing does not begin when the pain goes away. It begins when the story is finally spoken. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grievers are afraid to share certain parts of their story What happens when grief stories are kept inside Why painful memories replay over and over again How silence increases isolation and emotional weight Why telling your grief story helps the brain process it The importance of being witnessed in your grief How The Story Room creates a safe space for real grief Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. What parts of my grief have I never said out loud? Am I holding back my story to protect other people’s comfort? What memories keep replaying in my mind? Where do I feel like I have no place to share this? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “This is the part of my grief I’ve never said out loud.” Then write it. Not the edited version. Not the acceptable version. The real one. Because what stays unspoken stays heavy. Resources + Next Steps If this episode spoke to you, it is because there is a part of your story that needs to be heard. You do not have to carry it alone. 👉 Join The Story Room: Because your healing begins when your story is finally witnessed. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40649090

Why You Still Feel Lost in Your Grief (And What No One Shows You) 03/27/2026

Why You Still Feel Lost in Your Grief (And What No One Shows You) Episode Description “Grief doesn’t feel confusing because you’re broken. It feels confusing because no one ever showed you how to understand it.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down one of the biggest gaps in grief support: no one actually helps you understand your grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full body experience that affects your sleep, your thoughts, your memory, your identity, and your daily life. And yet, most people are never given the space to look at it. Instead, they are given comfort. They are given timelines. They are told to keep going. But what they are not given is understanding. In this episode, Sharon introduces the purpose behind the Grief Assessment—a structured conversation designed to help you finally look at your grief honestly and begin to make sense of what you are experiencing. She explains why grief feels so overwhelming, why your mind keeps replaying moments, and why talking through your story is one of the most important parts of processing it. This conversation is not about fixing you. It is about helping you understand what is happening inside of you. Because healing does not begin with answers. It begins with understanding. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why most grievers never get a real understanding of their grief How grief affects your body, mind, and daily functioning Why your brain keeps replaying painful moments The role of telling your grief story in healing What the Grief Assessment actually is and how it works How patterns like avoidance, guilt, and isolation show up Why confusion decreases when you begin to understand your grief Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Have I ever truly been asked about my grief? What parts of my story have I not fully spoken out loud? Where is my grief showing up in my body and daily life? What patterns am I noticing in how I handle my grief? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “How is my grief actually showing up in my life?” Then answer honestly. Not the short version. Not the version you tell others. The real one. Because understanding your grief is the first step to moving it. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because something in you is ready to understand your grief on a deeper level. You don’t need to keep guessing. You don’t need to figure this out alone. 👉 Take the Grief Assessment: Because your healing starts when your grief finally makes sense. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40648300

The Truth About Narcissists No One Tells You with Aisha 03/20/2026

The Truth About Narcissists No One Tells You with Aisha Episode Description “You’re not stuck because you still love them. You’re stuck because of the attachment.” In this episode of Grieve That Sh!t, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with a narc recovery coach and author of Toxic Charm to break down one of the most confusing and painful relationship dynamics people experience. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just about death. It shows up anywhere attachment is broken. And when narcissistic patterns are involved, that attachment becomes even more intense, unstable, and hard to walk away from. Together, they unpack what narcissism actually looks like in real life, why it feels like love one moment and disappears the next, and why so many people stay stuck trying to figure the other person out instead of coming back to themselves. They explore how these relationships create emotional highs and lows, how patterns repeat, and why clarity—not more guessing—is what begins to shift everything. This conversation is not about labeling people. It is about understanding patterns. Because sometimes the hardest truth is this: You can love someone… and still be stuck in something that is hurting you. What You’ll Learn in This Episode What narcissism actually is in plain language Why these relationships feel intense, addictive, and confusing The difference between selfish behavior and narcissistic patterns Why you do not need a diagnosis to begin your healing How attachment and grief keep you tied to the relationship Why “just leave” is not as simple as it sounds How to start rebuilding self-trust after losing yourself Why patterns matter more than labels Questions to Sit With After Listening Take your time with these. Am I holding on to who they are… or who I hoped they could be? What patterns have I been ignoring or explaining away? Have I been trying to understand them more than I understand myself? What would it look like to choose clarity over confusion? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What patterns did I experience that I kept trying to explain away?” Then answer honestly. Not the version that protects them. Not the version that minimizes what happened. The real one. Because you cannot break a cycle you are still trying to justify. Resources + Next Steps If this episode resonated with you, it is because something in you is ready for clarity. You do not need to keep guessing. You do not need to keep decoding. You do not need to keep losing yourself trying to make it make sense. 👉 Find more resources and support at: /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40561040

What Is Your Grief Story 03/13/2026

What Is Your Grief Story Episode Description “Grief does not get louder because you are weak. It gets louder because it has nowhere to land.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, talks about something most grievers never receive after loss: a true witness to their grief story. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is the mind and body trying to process something life changing that the world around you quickly moves on from. While everyone else returns to their normal life, the griever often finds themselves living in what Sharon calls the alternate universe of grief. And when there is no safe place to speak the story out loud, the grief does not disappear. It loops. It replays. It grows louder inside the nervous system. In this episode, Sharon explains why the brain keeps replaying painful memories after loss, how unspoken grief stays trapped in the body, and why having a witness is one of the most powerful parts of healing. She also introduces The Story Room, a space created for women to share their grief story out loud in a room of people who understand, listen without judgment, and hold space for the truth of what loss actually feels like. This conversation is not about fixing grief. It is about finally giving it a place to land. Because grief does not need to be corrected. It needs to be witnessed. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why every griever has a grief story that needs to be told What happens when grief has no witness Why the brain keeps replaying painful memories after loss How silence can keep grief stuck in the nervous system Why speaking your grief story out loud can begin to shift the pain What makes the Story Room different from typical grief support spaces How witnessing someone else’s grief can help you process your own Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. Let them sit with you. When did my grief story actually begin? Have I had a place where my grief could be spoken without correction or comparison? What parts of my story have I been editing or keeping quiet? What is my grief still trying to say? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “This is the part of my grief story I have never said out loud.” Then start writing. Not the version you tell people. Not the shortened version. Not the strong version. The real one. Because sometimes the first step in healing grief is simply letting the story be heard. Resources + Next Steps If this episode spoke to you, the place Sharon created for this work is called The Story Room. It is a guided grief space where women can share their story, be witnessed, and begin processing grief in a room that understands. The Story Room meets the every Thursday. 👉 Learn more and join here: /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40442010

Why You Keep Repeating the Same Relationship Patterns with Sean 03/06/2026

Why You Keep Repeating the Same Relationship Patterns with Sean Episode Description “Unprocessed grief does not disappear. It shows up in the way you attach, the way you fear, and the way you love.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Sean Walker, a faith-based relationship coach who helps men and women understand attachment patterns, regulate their nervous systems, and stop repeating the same painful relationship cycles. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is what happens when love has nowhere to land. And that same injury can show up after death, divorce, breakup, abandonment, or the loss of a connection that was never safely formed. Together, Sharon and Sean unpack the powerful overlap between grief and attachment. They explore how early relationships shape the way we love, why people cling or shut down, how labels can help but also keep people stuck, and what it really means to heal at the soul level instead of just trying to fix the relationship. This conversation is not about dating tricks. It is about internal rewiring. Because sometimes the real heartbreak is not just who left. It is the pattern that keeps getting repeated. What You’ll Learn in This Episode How grief and attachment are deeply connected Why breakup pain is often more than “just a breakup” What anxious and avoidant attachment can look like in real life Why people over-identify with labels instead of doing the healing work How unprocessed grief can keep showing up in dating and relationships Why you can still love someone and know the relationship is not right for you What it means to build security that lasts beyond marriage or romantic love Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these quickly. Am I grieving a person, a relationship, or a version of safety I never had? What patterns do I keep repeating in love? Have I been using labels to understand myself — or to avoid feeling? Do I want love from a place of wholeness, or do I need it to prove I’m okay? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What am I really grieving in love?” Then answer honestly. Not the polished answer. Not the spiritual answer. Not the one that makes you sound healed. The real one. Because you cannot heal what you keep misnaming. Resources + Next Steps Find Sean Walker on social media at Coach Sean Walker Explore his resources, including Feel to Heal and Beat the Breakup 👉 Find everything at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40345805

Welcome To The Grief School 02/27/2026

Welcome To The Grief School Episode Description “Grief deserves care. It does not deserve to be shoved in a corner.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, pulls back the curtain and finally answers the question: What actually is The Grief School? After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned the hard way that grief is not something you “get over.” It cracks your heart open. It shifts your identity. It leaves you standing in the aftermath asking, What the hell am I supposed to do now? The Grief School was built for that moment. This episode walks you through every layer of the community — from the free Facebook spaces to the Story Room, Courage Club, Processing the Pain of Grief, Forever Changed, Honor Society, and beyond. Sharon explains how each space is designed to help women stop performing, start telling the truth, and finally process what actually happened to their hearts. This is not about moving on. It is about healing a broken heart in community. Because grief is heavy enough. Carrying it alone makes it heavier. What You’ll Learn in This Episode What The Grief School actually is — and who it’s for The difference between the free community spaces and the private university How the Story Room creates a safe place to speak the truth What happens inside Processing the Pain of Grief What Forever Changed really means — and why integration matters Why grief healing requires structure, community, and courage Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. What has happened in my life that cracked my heart open? Have I been trying to carry this alone? Where do I need to be witnessed instead of fixed? Am I ready to learn the truth about my grief? Homework for You Ask yourself: “Where is the safest place for me to begin?” Maybe it’s listening. Maybe it’s joining the free Facebook group. Maybe it’s coming to the Story Room. Just take one step. Healing doesn’t start with perfection. It starts with showing up. Resources + Next Steps Join the private Facebook group: The Grief School Sign up for the Story Room or Grief 101 using the links below 👉 Find everything at clickhereforhope.com /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40287970

Grief, Addiction, and the Power of One Moment with Emily 02/13/2026

Grief, Addiction, and the Power of One Moment with Emily Episode Description “Healing happens in moments. And sometimes one moment changes everything.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Emily, founder of Moment Cares — a full-service recovery and mental health support organization helping individuals and families navigate substance use, trauma, and emotional crisis. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It lives in the body. It hides in addiction. It shows up as anxiety, avoidance, overworking, numbing, and survival mode. And in this powerful conversation, Sharon and Emily connect the dots between grief, trauma, addiction, and the nervous system. With 18 years of personal sobriety and 15 years of professional experience, Emily shares how her own recovery journey revealed something deeper: alcohol and drugs are often not the root problem — they are the symptom. Underneath is unprocessed pain. Unfelt grief. A nervous system stuck in fear. Together, they explore the head–heart connection, why so many people live disconnected from their bodies, and how learning to sit with emotion — even for one minute — can begin to change everything. This episode is not just about addiction. It is about grief, trauma, community, and connection. Because healing does not happen in isolation. It happens when someone says, “Me too.” What You’ll Learn in This Episode How addiction and numbing behaviors are often responses to unprocessed grief Why sitting with emotion feels terrifying — and why it actually sets you free The difference between intellectualizing pain and feeling it in the body How trauma disconnects us from our own nervous system Why community is one of the most powerful tools in recovery How mental health, grief, and substance use are deeply connected Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these all at once. What have I been using to avoid feeling? Is my struggle really about the surface behavior — or something deeper? Where did I learn that my emotions were not safe? Who is safe enough for me to begin telling the truth? Homework for You The next time you feel overwhelmed, pause. Ask yourself: “What am I feeling in my body right now?” Not what you’re thinking. Not the story. Just the feeling. Sit with it for one minute. Watch what happens. That minute might be your moment. Resources + Next Steps Learn more about Emily and Moment Cares at momentcares.com 👉 Find grief support and resources at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40106030

10 Choices Every Griever Faces 02/06/2026

10 Choices Every Griever Faces Episode Description “You may not get to choose what you feel. But you do get to choose what you practice.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, breaks down something most grievers have never been told: You have choices in your grief. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief feels automatic. The memories. The body reactions. The waves that hit before you’re even fully awake. It can feel like something is happening to you — and you are stuck. But what if you are not stuck? This episode walks through 10 real choices every griever faces — not fluffy mindset shifts, but nervous-system level decisions that shape whether you stay in survival mode or begin moving toward healing. From avoidance vs. engagement, to isolation vs. regulated support, to surviving vs. living again — Sharon challenges the belief that time alone heals and invites you into active participation in your own healing. This episode is not about forcing feelings. It is about practicing safety. Because grief healing is not passive. It is something you participate in. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why you cannot always choose your emotions — but you can choose your response The difference between avoidance and true engagement How isolation keeps the nervous system in threat mode Why intellectualizing grief is not the same as processing it What it actually means to retrain your nervous system How survival mode becomes a habit — and how to slowly shift out of it Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. Where am I avoiding instead of engaging? Am I waiting for time to fix this — or am I participating in healing? Who feels safe enough to witness my grief without trying to fix it? What am I practicing daily — survival or safety? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What am I practicing in my grief?” Then list your honest answers. No shame. No judgment. Just awareness. Then circle one choice you are ready to practice differently this week. Healing does not happen by accident. It happens by repetition. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Find everything at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40098740

What Is Your Grief Costing You? 01/30/2026

What Is Your Grief Costing You? Episode Description “Your grief is not a burden. Your silence is.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, asks a hard but necessary question: What is your grief costing you? After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief does not just take the person you love. It takes your energy. Your focus. Your sense of self. And when you start hiding it, it takes even more. Many grievers believe staying quiet makes them strong. They believe pretending to be “okay” protects the people around them. But silence does not protect you. It isolates you. It disconnects you. It keeps you stuck in survival mode. This episode explores the hidden cost of emotional suppression and why grief needs a place to land. This episode is not about falling apart. It is about telling the truth. Because healing does not happen in hiding. It happens when your pain is seen. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why hiding your grief drains your energy and disconnects you from support How silence keeps you stuck in survival mode The difference between protecting others and abandoning yourself Why grief needs space, air, and honesty to begin healing Simple, practical ways to start telling the truth about your pain Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to rush these. What has my grief been costing me emotionally? Where have I been pretending instead of telling the truth? Who feels safe enough to hear even a small piece of my pain? What is one thing I need to say out loud this week? Homework for You At the top of a page, write: “What my silence is costing me.” Be honest. No performing. No minimizing. Just tell the truth. Then circle one small step you can take this week to let your grief have a place to land. That is where the shift begins. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Find everything at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/40098660

The Grief Men Are Never Taught to Talk About with Coach Martize 01/23/2026

The Grief Men Are Never Taught to Talk About with Coach Martize Episode Description “Grief does not disappear when you ignore it. It just gets heavier when you carry it alone.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens an honest conversation about men, grief, and emotional pain. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief is not just sadness. It is a full-body experience that affects thoughts, emotions, and the nervous system. And while grief impacts everyone, many men are taught early that strength means silence. This episode challenges the belief that “big boys don’t cry” and explores what really happens when men are never given space to feel, talk, or be witnessed in their grief. Sharon is joined by Coach Martize of The Frazier Group, who brings his personal story and professional experience into the conversation. Together, they unpack how emotional suppression is learned, why avoidance is not weakness but survival, and how outdated beliefs keep people stuck long after the loss. This episode is not about fixing grief. It is about creating space for it. Because pain does not need to be handled. It needs to be held. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why emotional pain is often avoided, not because of weakness, but because of conditioning How men are taught to survive instead of feel The difference between strength and emotional suppression Where beliefs about toughness and vulnerability come from Why grief needs space, not silence Questions to Sit With After Listening You do not need to answer these quickly. Where did I learn that showing emotion was unsafe? What feelings have I been pushing down instead of listening to? How has “being strong” shaped the way I grieve? Where do I need space instead of advice? Homework for You Write this at the top of a page: “What I was taught about emotions.” Now finish the sentence honestly. No fixing. No explaining. Just notice what comes up. That awareness matters. Resources + Next Steps 👉 Find everything at clickhereforhope.com /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39852210

How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 2 01/16/2026

How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 2 “She was more than her ending. And healing didn’t mean letting her go. It meant letting the pain stop running the show.” In Part 2 of this deeply personal episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, grief specialist and founder of The Grief School, continues the raw conversation with Nikki about grieving a mother who was also her best friend. This episode moves beyond the loss and into what happens after the world keeps spinning and you’re still stuck. Nikki shares what it was really like to resist grief work, to believe that suffering was the only way to honor her mom, and to carry guilt she didn’t even realize she was holding. Together, Sharon and Nikki unpack one of the most painful grief lies of all: “If I heal, it means I didn’t love them enough.” You’ll hear how healing finally began when Nikki stopped protecting the pain and allowed herself to tell the truth about what she lost, what she carried, and what she deserved next. This episode is about releasing unhealthy grief, honoring the full life of your person, and learning how to live again without betraying the love that came before. What You’ll Hear in This Episode Why many grievers believe suffering equals loyalty How guilt hides inside grief and keeps you stuck What it means to be “more than their ending” Why healing doesn’t erase love, memories, or connection How letting the pain soften creates space to celebrate your person again Questions to Sit With After Listening You don’t have to answer these perfectly. Just honestly. Where have I believed that my pain is protecting my person? What part of my grief feels unhealthy, even if I don’t want to admit it yet? Am I afraid that healing means leaving them behind? If my person could speak to me right now, what would they want for my life? What would it look like to grieve and live at the same time? Gentle Homework Write this sentence at the top of a page: “They were more than their ending.” Now finish it without rushing. Let memories come. Let truth come. Let the love show up. You’re not erasing them. You’re letting their whole life matter again. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39681340

How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 1 01/09/2026

How to Grieve a Mother Who Was Your Best Friend with Nikki Part 1 “You were never meant to grieve quietly. Your emotions didn’t show up to hurt you. They showed up to help you process what just happened.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, sits down with Nikki to talk about a kind of loss that cuts straight to the core. The loss of a mother who was also a best friend. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon learned that grief isn’t one-dimensional. There are layers. And one of the most overlooked layers is the grief that comes from losing the person who knew you, guided you, and helped you make sense of life. In this conversation, Nikki shares the story of her mom Cheryl. Not just who she was, but how deeply intertwined she was in every part of her life. From daily texts and phone calls to faith, caregiving, unanswered prayers, and the shock of having no time to prepare. This episode explores what happens when grief collides with faith, when anger at God feels unavoidable, and when the foundation you were raised on both supports you and breaks your heart at the same time. We talk about the reality of caregiving, the trauma of watching someone you love decline, and the quiet ways people stay connected after loss. Keeping a phone on. Sending messages that will never be answered. Letting grandchildren leave voicemails. Choosing connection instead of rules. This is an honest, raw conversation about layered grief, unfinished moments, and learning how to live in a world where your anchor is gone. You’re not doing grief wrong. You’re responding to something that mattered deeply. Let’s grieve that shit together. What You’ll Hear in This Episode • Why losing a mother who was also a best friend creates a second layer of grief • How caregiving changes the grief experience before death even happens • What it’s like to have no time to process before everything changes • How faith can both comfort and anger you after loss • Why staying connected in your own way is not wrong • The difference between healing and erasing the relationship Reflection Questions Take your time with these. There’s no rush. Who was your person to you beyond the title they held in your life? What part of your grief do you feel most people don’t understand? Where has faith supported you, and where has it felt complicated or painful? What unfinished moments or conversations still live in your body? What connection are you holding onto that brings you comfort, even if others wouldn’t understand it? If you stopped judging your grief, what would you allow yourself to feel? Gentle Homework Write this sentence at the top of a page: “What hurts the most about losing them is…” Let yourself finish it without fixing, explaining, or softening the answer. That honesty is part of your healing. Resources + Next Steps 🎥 Watch Sharon’s grief teachings and video overviews 🎧 Explore deep-dive podcast episodes like this one 📘 Access study guides, journal prompts, and grief education 🧠 Continue your work inside The Grief School 👉 Everything lives at clickhereforhope.com You don’t have to rush this. You don’t have to be okay. You just have to be honest. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39681245

Your Grief Brain vs Your Grieving Heart 01/02/2026

Your Grief Brain vs Your Grieving Heart “Your brain didn’t break when your person died. It’s just doing what it knows—trying to protect you from pain. But grief doesn’t live in your brain. It lives in your heart.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, dives deep into one of the biggest truths about grief: you can’t think your way out of it. After losing her nephew Austin, Sharon discovered firsthand that grief isn’t logical—it’s emotional. Your brain tries to reason, fix, and explain the unexplainable, while your heart just breaks wide open. That war between the head and the heart? It’s exactly why you feel like you’re spinning. This episode unpacks the difference between intellect, emotion, and sensation—and shows why healing can only happen when you stop trying to “figure it out” and start feeling it. Sharon shares the same lessons that inspired her book This Is Grief and walks you through how to finally calm your mind so you can listen to your heart. Because the truth is: your heart already knows what your brain keeps trying to solve. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grief is emotional—not intellectual—and how that changes everything The silent war between your brain and your heart after loss Why logic and reason can’t fix what’s broken in your soul How thoughts like “Why didn’t I go?” or “I should have done more” keep you stuck in pain What it really means to “drop into your heart” and let it speak Homework for You If you’ve been spinning in your thoughts, here’s your assignment: Grab a sheet of paper and write down one question that won’t stop looping in your mind—like “Why me?” or “Why didn’t I answer the phone?” Now write your honest answer. Don’t edit. Don’t analyze. Just let your heart respond. Then underneath that answer, finish this sentence: “What I really feel is…” That’s where your healing begins—not in your thoughts, but in your truth. Resources + Next Steps 🎥 Get the 4-Part Video Series “This Is Grief” — Walk through Sharon’s full teaching on what grief is, where it lives, and how to heal. 📖 Read the Book “This Is Grief” — The definition Sharon needed when Austin died. 🧠 Join The Grief School’s Study Hall — Weekly live support where you can share, learn, and heal together. 👉 Download or watch it all at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/38477805

How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 2 12/19/2025

How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 2 In Part Two of this Grieve That Shit conversation, Sharon Brubaker and Dr. Elijah Frazier move past introductions and into the heart of what grievers struggle with most: choice, accountability, faith, emotions, and permission to heal. This episode challenges one of the most damaging beliefs grievers carry—that grief is something they must endure forever. Sharon and Dr. Frazier speak directly to the idea that pain is inevitable after loss, but staying trapped in suffering is not the only option. They talk honestly about how grief can steal joy, peace, and energy when we are not aware of the choices we are making. Dr. Frazier introduces a powerful metaphor: your joy is on the auction block every day, and too often, people unknowingly give it away to pain, guilt, fear, or other people’s expectations. The conversation also dives into faith, anger at God, and the pressure grievers feel to perform spirituality instead of telling the truth. Sharon and Dr. Frazier make it clear that real healing does not require pretending, suppressing emotions, or being “good” in your grief. It requires honesty, boundaries, and the willingness to do the work. This episode speaks directly to the griever who feels stuck, judged, or afraid to move forward. It offers permission to feel fully, question deeply, and still choose healing. 🧠 Key Points Discussed: Why grievers often believe they have no choices and how that belief keeps them stuck The difference between pain and suffering in grief How joy and peace are quietly given away without awareness Why accountability is not punishment but empowerment The role of faith as a bridge, not a crutch Why being angry at God does not block healing The difference between feelings and emotions and why both matter Why natural emotions like anger, anxiety, sadness, and depression are not wrong How spiritual platitudes can invalidate grief and cause harm Why healing requires action, not waiting The importance of boundaries when you are grieving Why emotions need time and space to do their job 📓 Journal Questions for Reflection: Where do I feel like grief has taken away my choices? What pain am I experiencing, and where might I be adding suffering on top of it? In what moments do I notice my joy being “sold off” to other people or situations? What emotions am I afraid to feel fully? How have faith, beliefs, or expectations shaped the way I grieve? Where do I feel pressure to perform healing instead of living it honestly? What would it look like to give my emotions permission to do their work? 🩶 Conclusion: Grief is not a script. It is not a performance. And it is not something you have to endure forever to prove your love. You are allowed to feel anger. You are allowed to question faith. You are allowed to heal. This episode reminds grievers that emotions are not the enemy. Suppressing them is. Healing does not come from pretending everything is okay. It comes from honesty, accountability, and choosing yourself again and again. This is Grieve That Shit. And this is where healing continues. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39477040

How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 1 12/19/2025

How to Stop Treating Grief Like a System with Dr. Elijah Frazier Part 1 In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker introduces a defining moment for The Grief School and the podcast. For the first time, she welcomes Dr. Elijah Frazier and shares the news that The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group. This is not an announcement episode filled with buzzwords or credentials. It’s a conversation about people, pain, and what real care actually looks like when someone is at their breaking point. Sharon and Dr. Frazier talk openly about why grief cannot be handled by systems, scripts, or one-size-fits-all solutions. They explore the difference between easy work and necessary work, and why healing requires intentional relationships, honesty, and empowerment rather than dependency. Dr. Frazier shares his philosophy of care, his commitment to meeting people where they are, and why building a multidisciplinary team matters when someone’s life has been shaken by loss. Together, they explain how grief, mental health, physical health, faith, and life circumstances are deeply connected and why separating them often leaves people stuck. This episode sets the foundation for what’s coming next. It introduces a partnership built on trust, integrity, and the belief that grief deserves to be held by people, not processed through a system. This is part one of a two-part conversation. Part two goes deeper into grief, choice, and what it means to move forward without abandoning your pain. 🧠 Key Points Discussed: Why The Grief School is now powered by The Frazier Group and what that truly means The difference between easy conversations and necessary conversations in healing Why grief cannot be treated with cookie-cutter scripts or checklists The importance of honoring each person’s story instead of forcing outcomes Why empowerment matters more than dependency in long-term healing How unresolved grief often overlaps with weight, health, relationships, and identity Why a collaborative, multidisciplinary approach serves grievers better The role of intentionality in healing and decision-making What it means to do heart-centered work instead of system-centered care 📓 Journal Questions for Reflection: Where have I felt rushed, minimized, or misunderstood in my grief? What kind of support have I been needing but not receiving? How does it feel to consider care that honors my full story, not just my symptoms? Where in my life do I need empowerment instead of being rescued? What would it mean to feel truly seen in my grief? 🩶 Conclusion: Grief does not need to be fixed. It does not need to be rushed. And it should never be handled by a system that forgets the human in front of it. This episode marks the beginning of a deeper, more intentional way of supporting grievers. A way that honors pain, respects complexity, and believes healing happens through real connection. Your story is not finished. And you deserve care that treats it that way. This is Grieve That Shit. And this is where healing begins. /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39474390

What Grief Is Not 12/12/2025

What Grief Is Not “Grief is not a mental illness. It’s not weakness. It’s not a checklist to finish or a line you’re supposed to move through. It’s love—with nowhere left to go.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, gets brutally honest about everything grief isn’t. For too long, society has treated grief like a disorder to diagnose, a problem to medicate, or a series of stages to climb. But grief isn’t logical, linear, or tidy—it’s wild, unpredictable, and deeply human. Sharon unpacks why labeling grief as depression or PTSD misses the truth entirely, and how our culture’s obsession with “fixing” pain keeps us from actually healing it. You’ll hear the truth about what happens when you zig and zag through your pain, why falling apart is part of the process, and why crying, rage, and exhaustion aren’t weakness—they’re proof that you loved deeply. Because grief isn’t something you escape. It’s something you integrate. It’s the story of love that still lives in you, even when the person you loved is gone. What You’ll Learn in This Episode Why grief is not a mental illness—and what it actually is The truth about the “five stages” and why they never applied to grievers Why grief isn’t linear, logical, or something to “get over” How emotional chaos (crying, anger, numbness) is a normal part of healing The many ways we try to numb grief—through work, food, alcohol, or pretending Why facing your grief head-on is the only way through Homework for You This week, write this sentence at the top of a page: “Grief is not…” Then finish it five times, in your own words. “Grief is not something I can control.” “Grief is not weakness.” “Grief is not my enemy.” Keep writing until the truth feels real in your body. You’re not broken—you’re human. Resources + Next Steps 🎥 Get the Video Series “This Is Grief” — A powerful companion to Sharon’s book that walks you through every truth she teaches in this episode, with reflective journaling prompts after each lesson. 📘 Read the Book “This Is Grief” — The definition Sharon wished existed when her nephew Austin died. 🧠 Join Study Hall at The Grief School — Weekly live sessions where you can ask questions, share stories, and find tools for healing. 👉 Access everything at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/38477900

Forever Changed But Not Broken 12/05/2025

Forever Changed But Not Broken “When your person died, a part of you died too. Not your whole self—but the version of you that only existed in connection with them. That’s the part grief takes. That’s what forever changed really means.” In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker, Certified Grief Specialist and founder of The Grief School, opens her heart about what it truly means to be forever changed—but not broken. After losing her nephew Austin and later her best friend Sharon, her life split into two: before and after. But in this episode, she invites you into the middle—the space between who you were and who you’re becoming. It’s the unseen, disorienting place where identity, routine, and meaning fall apart. This is the part of grief no one talks about. The part where you’re not who you were, but not yet who you’ll be. Sharon calls it “the tween.” And it’s here, in the unknown, that real healing begins. You’ll hear what it means to let go of the pieces that no longer match your truth, how to live with the absence that screams louder than words, and why being “forever changed” is not the same as being broken. Because the truth is—grief rewires your story. But you still get to decide how that story ends. What You’ll Learn in This Episode The three phases of grief: before, between, and after Why your identity shifts after loss—and how to honor the version of you that’s gone How to navigate the “tween,” the unknown space between devastation and rebuilding The truth about being “forever changed, not broken” Why time doesn’t fix grief—but processing the pain does Homework for You Find a quiet place this week and journal through these prompts: 1️⃣ What part of me died when they died? 2️⃣ What part of me is still here, waiting to be known again? 3️⃣ What truth am I ready to stop fighting? You don’t have to have perfect answers. You just have to begin writing them. Because healing starts the moment you stop trying to go back—and start facing the after. Resources + Next Steps 🎥 Get the Forever Changed Video Series — A 3-part self-guided video course with slides, reflection prompts, and deep-dive lessons to help you process your pain. 📘 Download the eBook “This Is Grief” — Learn the foundations of grief and what it really means to be forever changed. 🧠 Join The Grief School Study Hall — Live weekly support sessions where you can bring your questions, your tears, and your truth. 👉 Access everything at /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/38477880

When a Memory Hits You Like Fear 11/28/2025

When a Memory Hits You Like Fear Episode Summary: This episode cracks open one of the most frightening and misunderstood parts of grief: when a memory hits your body like a shock. You’re sitting still, lost in a moment with your person, and suddenly your stomach drops, your breath tightens, your heart races, and you remember all over again that they died. It feels like you’re grieving in two places at once. Sharon Brubaker takes you inside the neurobiology behind that jolt. She breaks down how the hippocampus pulls old memories like scenes from a movie, why the amygdala tags those memories as danger, and how your brain fires survival signals long before you can think. This isn’t denial and it isn’t weakness. It is your nervous system trying to protect you from emotional injury, and it moves faster than the rest of you can keep up. Through real-life examples and clear teaching, Sharon explains why certain memories hit harder, why they cycle over and over, and why it feels like the loss is happening in real time even years later. Most importantly, she shows you what it takes to calm the system that’s been stuck on high alert and how real healing begins when you learn to process the pain—rather than waiting for it to fade on its own. Key Points Discussed: • Why your brain drops you into old memories without warning • How the hippocampus and amygdala replay emotional pain as if it’s happening now • Why the body reacts before the mind understands • What reconciliation shock is and why it feels like losing your person twice • How unresolved emotion keeps your nervous system stuck in survival mode • Why memory jolts soften once grief pain is processed • What Processing the Pain of Grief teaches your brain to finally settle Journal Questions: • What memory pulls your body into a sudden drop • What part of that memory still feels emotionally unresolved • How does your body respond before your mind catches up • What does the second wave feel like when the truth hits • What would change in your life if your brain learned to soften these jolts Conclusion: These memory shocks don’t mean you’re going backwards. They don’t mean you’re in denial. They are the biology of grief doing what it was never taught to do differently. When you learn how to process the pain, the brain finally stops hitting the danger button every time you touch the past. Your system settles. The memories soften. The grief stops feeling like an ambush. This is the work. This is the shift. This is where healing begins. Contact Us: Ready to calm your grief brain and learn how to process the pain, not just survive it Join Sharon Brubaker inside Processing the Pain of Grief, her live classroom where you learn what your brain is doing, how grief works in the body, and how to move the pain out instead of holding it in. Learn more and get support inside The Grief School community. Website: thegriefschool.com Contact: info@thegriefschool.com TikTok, YouTube, Instagram: @thegriefschool /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39200670

Why Noise Feels Like an Attack In Grief 11/21/2025

Why Noise Feels Like an Attack In Grief Episode Summary: In this episode of Grieve That Shit, Sharon Brubaker talks about something most grievers never see coming: why normal sounds suddenly feel like an attack. The kids laughing, the microwave door slamming, a choir starting at church, a car alarm in the parking lot. Things you used to handle just fine now hit your body like lightning. Sharon walks you through what is really happening inside your grieving brain. She breaks down the amygdala, the nervous system, the HPA axis, and why grief flips all of them into survival mode. This is not you “being dramatic.” This is biology. Your brain is trying to protect your broken heart and it does not know the difference between emotional danger and physical danger. Through real stories from her clients, Sharon shows how jumpiness, noise sensitivity, snapping at people, and shutting down in crowds are not personality flaws. They are signs that your grief system is stuck on high alert and has not been taught how to turn off. Then she shows you the path out: learning how to calm your brain by processing the pain of grief instead of running from it. Key Points Discussed: Why everyday noise can feel like an attack when you are grieving How the amygdala scans for emotional pain and treats it like danger What happens to your thinking center when grief hits and why you feel numb How the sympathetic nervous system keeps your body in survival mode Why your senses feel sharper, your reactions bigger, and your patience thinner The four grief responses Sharon sees most often: resisting, reacting, avoiding, and pretending How stress hormones like cortisol and adrenaline keep your system on high alert Why this noise sensitivity is not permanent when you learn to process the pain How Processing the Pain of Grief helps calm your brain and soften your grief Journal Questions for Reflection: What sounds or situations make your body jump or tense up now that you are grieving Where do you notice your thinking has slowed down or feels foggy When was the last time you snapped or shut down and later realized you were not really mad at that person or thing What background noise or repeated behavior from others feels harder to tolerate since your loss What would it look like to give your brain and body a place to calm down instead of just pushing through Conclusion: Noise sensitivity in grief is not you “losing it.” It is your grief biology doing its best to protect you with the only tools it knows. Your brain is on high alert. Your body is tired. Your system is trying to outrun the pain. But this does not have to be your forever. When you learn how to process the pain of grief, your nervous system can settle. Your thoughts get clearer. Your reactions soften. The world gets a little quieter again. You will still miss your person, but the grief does not have to feel like an attack every time a memory or a sound shows up. Contact Us: Ready to calm your grief brain and learn how to process the pain, not just survive it Join Sharon Brubaker inside Processing the Pain of Grief, her live classroom where you learn what your brain is doing, how grief works in the body, and how to move the pain out instead of holding it in. Learn more and get support inside The Grief School community. Website: thegriefschool.com Contact: TikTok, YouTube, Instagram: @thegriefschool /episode/index/show/healingstartswiththeheart/id/39125485

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