Monetize the Mic
Hosts Jessica Rhodes and Margy Feldhuhn are the co-owners of Interview Connections, an award-winning podcast guest booking agency. Listen to Monetize the Mic every week to learn the secrets of leveraging interviews on other’s people’s podcasts to increase your brand awareness, attract more warm qualified leads, and transform your business and life with the power of visibility.
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Why You Need to Use Podcast Guesting to Grow Your Speaking Business Now!
08/10/2022
Why You Need to Use Podcast Guesting to Grow Your Speaking Business Now!
Enjoy the replay of a Facebook Live that Jessica hosted with Jacqueline Nagle about why you need to use podcast guesting to grow your speaking business now! To learn more about Jacqueline and her programs for speakers, visit (affiliate link)
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Visibility Breakthroughs with Dr. Joli Hamilton
07/01/2022
Visibility Breakthroughs with Dr. Joli Hamilton
Dr. Joli Hamilton is the relationship coach for couples who color outside the lines. She is a research psychologist, TEDx speaker, best-selling author, and AASECT (pronounced ay-sect) certified sex educator. Joli also co-hosts the Project Relationship podcast with her anchor partner, Ken. Joli’s been featured in The New York Times, Vogue, NPR, and The Atlantic. She’s spent the past two decades studying and reimagining what love can be if we open our imaginations to possibility.Joli helps people create non-monogamous partnerships that are custom-built for their authentic selves, no more shrinking, pretending, or hiding required. In this episode, she shares the biggest visibility breakthroughs she’s had thanks to podcast guesting and coaching with Jess, Margy and the Interview Connections team! Take Joli’s quiz at https://joliquiz.com/
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Are You A Workaholic Or A People Pleaser?
06/27/2022
Are You A Workaholic Or A People Pleaser?
In this episode, Jess shares about a pivotal moment recently when she realized that her workaholism was actually masking her people-pleasing tendencies. Audio Transcript: Jessica Rhodes: On this episode, I want to share a really, really great breakthrough, I had. 2 00:00:10.559 --> 00:00:21.870 Jessica Rhodes: spoiler alert we're sharing all of our breakthroughs on this podcast now, but I want to share a really important breakthrough about like workaholism and people pleasing and the connection because. 3 00:00:22.470 --> 00:00:35.640 Jessica Rhodes: I had this pivotal moment recently when I was you know talking with my husband Jamie he was like hey you know we do our two week vacation every summer with our like extended family. 4 00:00:36.390 --> 00:00:51.660 Jessica Rhodes: And then he was like I really think this summer, we should also do a week vacation like just the four of us, and I was like yeah and when he suggested that I was starting to get a little nervous about taking another week off and. 5 00:00:52.740 --> 00:01:06.270 Jessica Rhodes: Normally one would be excited for a vacation, but it was like kind of stressing me out like scheduling it in, and you know we found this week where it's fine like there's no launching happening and. 6 00:01:07.530 --> 00:01:10.410 Jessica Rhodes: It was like we were looking at this Wednesday to a Wednesday. 7 00:01:11.490 --> 00:01:19.350 Jessica Rhodes: And I saw that on the calendar was like a group mastermind call and content day like where we record all our podcast and I was like. 8 00:01:20.100 --> 00:01:26.430 Jessica Rhodes: Okay Jamie maybe like let's leave like Wednesday afternoon because, like, I have some stuff in the morning and he was like. 9 00:01:27.240 --> 00:01:41.250 Jessica Rhodes: it's we're talking about August, like you, can't move it and I was like getting really nervous and like uncomfortable and I was like um no I can get it, and he, like what he gave me the look right he was like seriously like you can't move this like. 10 00:01:42.360 --> 00:01:50.850 Jessica Rhodes: And I really like it was just in that moment, where I was like oh my God like I don't i'm not like addicted to work i'm not a workaholic I am. 11 00:01:51.240 --> 00:01:56.970 Jessica Rhodes: deeply afraid of inconveniencing other people, because I knew that if I. 12 00:01:57.390 --> 00:02:05.610 Jessica Rhodes: said i'm going to be off that day I would have to ask Maggie can we record our podcast on a different day and I would have to say to MARQuIS can you lead the call that day. 13 00:02:06.390 --> 00:02:16.320 Jessica Rhodes: And I was so afraid to make that request, and I was like I have always identified as a hard worker I love work i'm a career woman like. 14 00:02:16.770 --> 00:02:28.830 Jessica Rhodes: That has been my identity and through all of this work that's happening right now, this personal work I realized, it is like people-pleasing manifesting as workaholism and an addiction to work. 15 00:02:29.130 --> 00:02:40.080 Jessica Rhodes: it's not an addiction to work, I actually quite enjoy taking time off, but I was so afraid of inconveniencing somebody that I just was like I love working. 16 00:02:42.120 --> 00:02:48.150 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah and, like the stuff that justice talking about is like very easy to reschedule to. 17 00:02:48.600 --> 00:02:49.950 Jessica Rhodes: Like it just exactly. 18 00:02:50.040 --> 00:03:02.100 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Like we reschedule like our content block when we record the podcast we reschedule it like all the time, in fact, the August, one is a reschedule of the original one because I booked a weekend with my basti and all the colleges move this. 19 00:03:03.840 --> 00:03:05.880 Jessica Rhodes: knocking I have different trauma tendencies. 20 00:03:07.770 --> 00:03:11.190 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah, but I think this is really good, because this is something. 21 00:03:12.840 --> 00:03:17.220 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): When we did the leadership and the nervous system panel hold on. 22 00:03:19.470 --> 00:03:30.540 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): When we did the leadership in the nervous system panel which we also put out as a podcast episode So hopefully you listen to it and talks about psychological safety we talked a little bit about. 23 00:03:32.880 --> 00:03:46.920 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): trauma informed leadership, which I think is really, really interesting and i'm excited to go down more of a rabbit hole on that, but one of the things we talked about because, having worked with Elizabeth Elizabeth Christoph who, I guess, we talked about in every. 24 00:03:46.920 --> 00:03:50.040 Jessica Rhodes: episode is basically our co host now we're. 25 00:03:50.820 --> 00:03:57.390 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): only slightly obsessed with her and the work that she's doing but um she was talking about herself how. 26 00:03:58.380 --> 00:04:08.850 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know nervous system dysregulation and trauma and stuff manifested as perfectionism and high achieving and how true that is for a lot of business owners, a lot of high performers. 27 00:04:09.810 --> 00:04:17.190 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): there's like this aspect of like yes, you love what you do, but then there's this aspect of the way that you're doing it that can be dysfunctional. 28 00:04:17.580 --> 00:04:22.020 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And it was really interesting because we're talking about leadership and the nervous system and talking about our teams. 29 00:04:22.440 --> 00:04:36.120 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And there's this sort of myth in mastermind groups and just groups of entrepreneurs talking it's like if somebody has a team Member who's like all into like first two o'clock in first o'clock out like all this stuff that like your. 30 00:04:36.120 --> 00:04:36.960 Jessica Rhodes: Last too long ago. 31 00:04:37.500 --> 00:04:37.950 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Oh yeah. 32 00:04:40.650 --> 00:04:41.520 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): See I can't even say. 33 00:04:43.050 --> 00:04:51.690 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah So if you have someone who's like the first in in the morning, the first out at night, like just working super hard I can't. 34 00:04:51.840 --> 00:04:53.460 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): See it's not me. 35 00:04:57.240 --> 00:05:08.820 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): there's this myth that if you have this employee who is so all in there working longer hours and everybody they're trying harder their work is perfect like they're just like this quintessential a player. 36 00:05:09.330 --> 00:05:15.330 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): everybody's like oh my God you're so lucky like where did you get them, how can we clone them. 37 00:05:15.720 --> 00:05:23.760 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And there's nothing wrong with having someone who's a super high performer i'm a high performer just as a high performer like it's good but there's also. 38 00:05:24.270 --> 00:05:31.470 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): With trauma informed leadership, there is this aspects of is that person. 39 00:05:32.160 --> 00:05:42.240 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Working that way because of dysregulation and a lot of the times, I think the answer is yes, we can still perform at a high level, we can still work hard. 40 00:05:42.510 --> 00:05:49.710 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): and go hard on the things that we love that we're in flow and alignment on that feel really easy but that generate results in revenue. 41 00:05:50.130 --> 00:05:56.100 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But I do think it's really powerful to look at this idea of especially. 42 00:05:56.550 --> 00:06:04.500 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know within capitalism it's being a hard worker being a duo or being a grinder being the hardest worker in the room, like. 43 00:06:04.860 --> 00:06:16.470 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): All there's so many sayings are so many quotes there are so many motivational posters like it's so glorified and I think it's really important to bring in this aspect of the dialogue that. 44 00:06:17.370 --> 00:06:34.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's kind of dysfunctional and while the label of being a workaholic or super hard worker feels really validating to the ego that ego boost might be covering up some less you know, maybe attractive or less. 45 00:06:34.770 --> 00:06:45.060 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): gratifying to the ego traits that have more to do with proving self worth getting affirmation not letting people down people pleasing all that stuff. 46 00:06:45.480 --> 00:06:51.690 Jessica Rhodes: yeah and when you understand and have these breakthroughs of understanding, your tendencies and what they're coming from. 47 00:06:52.380 --> 00:06:59.460 Jessica Rhodes: A lot of your actions can be similar, but it is totally perceived in a new way and you feel so much more different. 48 00:07:00.330 --> 00:07:02.010 Jessica Rhodes: You know so for me like I. 49 00:07:02.250 --> 00:07:16.020 Jessica Rhodes: I do, I love this business and I love, what I do and before I realized that I had these people pleasing tendencies, like, I mean i've heard for forever people like i'm a people pleaser and i'm like that's not me that's not me and i'm like so Okay, maybe it is so i've had. 50 00:07:16.530 --> 00:07:26.520 Jessica Rhodes: Since i've had this realization around like how I do, I have had these people pleasing tendencies now i'm realizing oh my gosh like I can see how many times, I was. 51 00:07:27.210 --> 00:07:36.690 Jessica Rhodes: working more hours working harder doing more things because I wanted to please people and I didn't want to inconvenience anyone, and I wanted to like show my worth. 52 00:07:37.200 --> 00:07:47.850 Jessica Rhodes: And now that I realized the difference like you know i'm working on our social media at seven in the morning because I want to because it's fun, not because i'm trying to please somebody and then. 53 00:07:48.210 --> 00:07:56.850 Jessica Rhodes: I may stop working at 430 or four o'clock because I know i've provided the value that I can provide that day and I don't feel bad or guilty about it and it's just. 54 00:07:57.990 --> 00:08:05.970 Jessica Rhodes: it's so interesting to have this realization and this breakthrough because i'm now seeing it and other people, which is like i'm like okay now I gotta. 55 00:08:07.050 --> 00:08:15.450 Jessica Rhodes: I can't not coach this person or this or you know, and I think it's I love what you're saying about the dysfunctional. 56 00:08:16.470 --> 00:08:26.970 Jessica Rhodes: You know traits because it's It makes me sad right when people are like they want to check their email on vacation because they don't want to inconvenience, you and I think that's something. 57 00:08:27.330 --> 00:08:38.010 Jessica Rhodes: I mean you talk about this, all the time, like really healing the workplace healing the team, so people can feel free to to take that time off without feeling stressed about it. 58 00:08:38.970 --> 00:08:51.000 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah and the healing of a team starts with the leaders right like it's you it's not enough to just work on an individual level, you also have to work with the organization and, as a group, but it starts with the leader. 59 00:08:51.330 --> 00:09:02.730 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And you can send a message with your words that it's okay to unplug and take a vacation if you're not actually modeling that energetically and with your actions. 60 00:09:03.480 --> 00:09:10.080 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): They people are smart social mammals pick up on cues and it's not just what you say. 61 00:09:10.320 --> 00:09:24.510 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And if you say something's Okay, but every other piece of you is indicating it's not okay your team will get the message they're like all right wink wink got it it's okay to do this, like I know it's not and they won't do it so. 62 00:09:25.380 --> 00:09:38.430 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): This healing that we do as leaders has such an impact to create this next level team to create group healing and we knew think about how people spend and we i'll probably do a whole. 63 00:09:38.910 --> 00:09:44.040 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): episode on this, but when you think about how people spend the majority of their time at work. 64 00:09:44.400 --> 00:09:56.280 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): The space that you create within your Organization has such a huge impact on people's lives which then has this ripple effect on all the people that they live with and come in contact with. 65 00:09:56.610 --> 00:10:11.970 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): So I think leaders have this incredible opportunity to create the shift in consciousness and to heal generational trauma and all of this stuff by creating these safe spaces, with our teams, but it really does start with you as the leader. 66 00:10:12.780 --> 00:10:26.610 Jessica Rhodes: yeah So if you do feel like you're a workaholic and you're addicted to your work just know that there may be some trauma to process there may be some tendencies playing out that are in your blind spot and. 67 00:10:27.150 --> 00:10:40.560 Jessica Rhodes: As somebody who has felt like a workaholic there is this, there is a possibility for you to enjoy taking time off and to do it in a way that feels really good and free and not like it's constricting you know. 68 00:10:41.130 --> 00:10:46.470 Jessica Rhodes: So we hope that this was helpful and maybe shed a light on something that you weren't looking at before.
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Luxury Manifestation Retreat Breakthroughs
06/20/2022
Luxury Manifestation Retreat Breakthroughs
Margy recently attended Rise Retreat in May and she shares all about it in this episode! Links mentioned: Audio Transcript: Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): In this episode, I am going to share some of the breakthroughs I had going on a manifestation retreat with Kathleen camera and I went on her rise retreat last week in the Bahamas and it was a really. 2 00:00:19.740 --> 00:00:39.270 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Profound amazing experience it wasn't what I thought it would be, but it definitely ended up being what I needed and so i've been sharing this on my personal instagram at hey MARQuIS on live, but we wanted to bring some of those lessons here to the podcast. 3 00:00:39.930 --> 00:00:50.310 Jessica Rhodes: yeah, and so this came about, we were in Florida for a mastermind that we're in Kelly Roach his legacy leaders, and you know Margie had this. 4 00:00:51.480 --> 00:00:52.230 Jessica Rhodes: Really, this like. 5 00:00:52.710 --> 00:01:02.280 Jessica Rhodes: Calling she's like I need someone to pour into me do I need like an executive coach like I need something right so she's now out seeking and I remember we're walking through the airport. 6 00:01:02.370 --> 00:01:14.910 Jessica Rhodes: Well, she had previously heard from Anna rains like you should go to kathleen's retreat and so we're walking she tells me about it in the hotel room and I was like okay like cool like an expensive retreat in the Bahamas sounds like a. 7 00:01:16.260 --> 00:01:17.250 Jessica Rhodes: Perfect business and. 8 00:01:21.120 --> 00:01:21.780 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was like. 9 00:01:22.140 --> 00:01:31.350 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): A true into MARQuIS style of like being like I think I want to invest in a you know, an executive coach should work with me a CEO. 10 00:01:31.680 --> 00:01:40.830 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And, but I had been afraid to ask because it felt really selfish to ask the business to invest in coaching that was just for me, but, but I was like you know. 11 00:01:41.250 --> 00:01:49.830 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): As CEO and showing up and coaching and pouring into everybody else I was like I really feel like I need somebody who's like pouring into me. 12 00:01:50.340 --> 00:01:57.930 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): So I was like i'll hire an executive coach and then as just said, I, so I reached out to Anna rains and i'm just kind of like researching different coaches. 13 00:01:58.590 --> 00:02:07.170 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Kathleen Cameron is amazing she's somebody i've like had my eye on who does incredible work with manifestation and she's a really powerful very authentic person. 14 00:02:07.500 --> 00:02:09.360 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so I reached out to Anna and i'm like. 15 00:02:09.750 --> 00:02:20.790 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): All right, like what a what a kathleen's programs look like you know she's got like some six months programs and there's like a group they're like group programs with a call once a week, which I really was looking for something one on one, but I figured i'd ask like. 16 00:02:21.150 --> 00:02:24.750 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): What does it look like and Anna was like you know I actually think. 17 00:02:25.770 --> 00:02:37.140 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I don't know that her programs would be as good a fit for you as this retreat this like three day retreat in the Bahamas it's going to be amazing Kathleen is going to be there again her energy you'll have these breakthroughs. 18 00:02:38.100 --> 00:02:47.730 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so, like when, for me, hiring an executive coach to me like telling jess and my wife like I think i'm going to go to the Bahamas and then being like what. 19 00:02:47.760 --> 00:02:54.360 Jessica Rhodes: Are you talking about so we're like walking through the palm beach airport and. 20 00:02:54.870 --> 00:03:00.990 Jessica Rhodes: she's like she has her phone out and she's like I really feel like I need to be there and i'm like all right. 21 00:03:04.230 --> 00:03:17.340 Jessica Rhodes: And like if you know mark it as as argues wife and I know very well when she says she really feels like she needs to be there, like we know it's going to happen and like there's not you know. 22 00:03:17.700 --> 00:03:22.710 Jessica Rhodes: it's like get on board or not, but like business happening, and so we sit down. 23 00:03:23.460 --> 00:03:28.530 Jessica Rhodes: And she's like really sharing like I really feel like I need to be there. 24 00:03:28.890 --> 00:03:37.320 Jessica Rhodes: And she was sort of like and I was like Okay, what does that mean because, like whenever we work with a coach like we always work with a coach like together like we do a mastermind together we're 50 partners and all that. 25 00:03:37.860 --> 00:03:48.420 Jessica Rhodes: And she was sort of like like do you want to check it out like what do you think, and I looked at it and I was like I mean I it's hard to do it's hard to look at a luxury retreat in the Bahamas and be like this ain't for me. 26 00:03:48.930 --> 00:04:01.830 Jessica Rhodes: But I looked at it and I was like this ain't for me like i'm like this Okay, you have my blessing, you can go on this retreat and i'm like I know it'll pay off, but it was like. 27 00:04:02.820 --> 00:04:09.060 Jessica Rhodes: Okay, this, this is what it's like to partner with marky she is like i'm going to do this and you're like I trust you. 28 00:04:10.380 --> 00:04:13.110 Jessica Rhodes: and go ahead. 29 00:04:14.340 --> 00:04:16.860 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah I get some intuitive hits that. 30 00:04:18.420 --> 00:04:26.820 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): seem really off topic, sometimes, but so far 100% of the time they have like paid off. 31 00:04:27.630 --> 00:04:34.590 Jessica Rhodes: it's just so funny because, like it went from like when I think executive coach and I know this like isn't probably super. 32 00:04:35.040 --> 00:04:51.090 Jessica Rhodes: You know, politically correct, but I just think of like an old man in a suit i'm like okay she's gonna go get some like CEO you know, and then it turns out she's like two weeks later in the Bahamas like in clear blue water and this like $33 million mansion and i'm like okay. 33 00:04:52.080 --> 00:05:05.730 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah and it was like and the thing is like yeah I mean a luxury retreat is cool but that wasn't what I set out for I really set out because I knew that I needed to up level as a leader. 34 00:05:06.090 --> 00:05:18.990 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I wanted someone that was coaching me and I wanted some coaching that was like just for me because, like just said, we are coaching together all the time, but increasingly we have very, very different roles and. 35 00:05:19.620 --> 00:05:29.100 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Like i'm the only one in the CEO see and like it's just a different vibe it's a different like I don't feel like i'm alone, sometimes. 36 00:05:29.370 --> 00:05:43.500 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so having a coach who's just working with me directly to help me be the best CEO possible and to help me coach and mentor everybody else in the business, who I met her directly and like to help them up level even more. 37 00:05:44.880 --> 00:05:47.250 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I was also picturing an old white man. 38 00:05:48.390 --> 00:05:53.550 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Which is why I was so funny because it was like the feeling was so strong and it was like also funny because. 39 00:05:53.970 --> 00:06:04.890 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I am a little bit like easing into travel, so the idea like i'm looking at this thing we're in the airport and I had just been like I think I want to travel less. 40 00:06:05.220 --> 00:06:10.830 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And this retreat is like less than a month away an international trip it, which is just like. 41 00:06:11.700 --> 00:06:23.550 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): On the surface, I was like this is, and of course it was like every annual doctor's appointment, I had fell during that one week it was like there was, like all these inconveniences that I was just like. 42 00:06:23.970 --> 00:06:31.020 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Oh, but I felt so strong and I was like I have to be there, and so I just I was, like all right i'm rescheduling everything and like. 43 00:06:31.650 --> 00:06:48.900 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know, deep appreciation to just for supporting me and for believing that there would be an Roi to the business and to my wife, for supporting me when she was like really not happy that I had just gotten home and was like i'm going to the Bahamas like by. 44 00:06:51.120 --> 00:07:06.450 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): She was not happy, but I knew that I had to go and I thought it was because I needed to go and get into kathleen's presence, because she has this incredible vibe and Energy I had heard about it. 45 00:07:06.930 --> 00:07:26.670 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I ended up going and we actually didn't spend a lot of time with Kathleen because she had some health issues, which was really interesting because, at first, the first day she wasn't there and I was like there was a part of my mind that was like oh wait a minute. 46 00:07:26.880 --> 00:07:38.340 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Like Why did I have this intuitive hit that I needed to be at this thing when the person who whose presence, I wanted to be in to get this next level guidance to bring back to the business. 47 00:07:38.790 --> 00:07:47.220 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): isn't here and I don't say that with any rudeness, but like those are the sort of limiting thoughts that come up sometimes but then there was this other part of me that was like. 48 00:07:47.550 --> 00:07:55.830 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): i'm here this investment is made, I am going to have a breakthrough and like when I decide i'm going to have a breakthrough. 49 00:07:56.250 --> 00:08:03.570 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): As I told a few people I could have a breakthrough staring at a telephone pole like breakthroughs on demand baby if. 50 00:08:04.020 --> 00:08:12.450 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): i'm going to have a breakthrough i'm going to have a breakthrough and I did end up having these huge breakthroughs, but they weren't and This is so true like when we did landmark it was like this, like. 51 00:08:13.050 --> 00:08:25.110 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I the breakthrough is never Look how I think they're going to look but it's always the breakthrough that I need and showing up without my wife without jess and justin I always go to business things together. 52 00:08:26.340 --> 00:08:35.310 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was so weird I like I couldn't believe it, so I show up in the super expensive Villa expecting to feel. 53 00:08:35.940 --> 00:08:43.590 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): This like amazing manifesting abundance right and I showed up and I actually felt kind of weird. 54 00:08:44.070 --> 00:08:57.300 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I was like shit like i'm not i'm not manifesting right, you know, like i'm supposed to i'm supposed to be in this expensive Villa and feel the feelings of abundance and, like all of this stuff and. 55 00:08:57.840 --> 00:09:04.710 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But I like showed up, and it was sort of awkward because I came a little bit earlier than everyone else, so there was only a few people in the House and, like. 56 00:09:04.950 --> 00:09:09.210 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And again, that i'm not knocking the retreat amazing retreat Kathleen is amazing. 57 00:09:09.540 --> 00:09:14.550 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): This is how I experienced it because of my level of consciousness, which then evolved we're going to take you through it. 58 00:09:14.850 --> 00:09:19.920 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But, so I first arrived and i'm feeling awkward and there's like a few people and i'm kind of like high. 59 00:09:20.370 --> 00:09:26.970 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And they all seem to know each other, because they had participated in Bob proctor and Kathleen programs for a long time. 60 00:09:27.270 --> 00:09:33.720 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): They are part of that world which I have never done any of those things, so people are like, why are you here, and I was like. 61 00:09:34.440 --> 00:09:42.960 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): i've gotten that question a few times you know, like just an Alex would would ask the same thing i'm not sure I just knew I had to be here and. 62 00:09:43.350 --> 00:09:51.780 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was sort of awkward and then everybody arrived, and we had this dinner but Kathleen was supposed to be there, but she wasn't there and it was. 63 00:09:52.110 --> 00:10:05.820 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was a little weird and I didn't really know anyone I knew one person I knew Annabel like she had other friends there who she's been friends with for a long time, so I didn't want to like intrude on her time with her bfs so I was just sort of like awkwardly floating around. 64 00:10:07.650 --> 00:10:22.740 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And being like Why do I feel so weird like i'm like Marty what the hell is wrong with you like you're literally in a mansion on the beach, why are you feeling uncomfortable you should just be feeling like amazing and manifest it. 65 00:10:24.180 --> 00:10:35.250 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so we go through the first full day of the retreat Kathleen still not there it's very unclear when she's going to get there if she's going to get there and i'm kind of like what is happening. 66 00:10:35.520 --> 00:10:45.150 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And i'm still like in this battle against myself of like Come on, you asshole like manifest like look at the ocean and feel the feelings of abundance margate. 67 00:10:45.210 --> 00:10:47.340 Jessica Rhodes: swing on those swings in the water. 68 00:10:48.330 --> 00:10:50.220 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But well we didn't get to the swings yet that was like. 69 00:10:50.220 --> 00:11:10.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Okay, but but i'm like come on girl like talking to myself, like and but still feeling so weird so we get through day one, and it's like nice um I think it was the I think it was all day one, because we get to dinner and or like dinner time and people are sharing. 70 00:11:11.820 --> 00:11:17.730 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I was like I need to share this because i've experienced this so many times. 71 00:11:18.150 --> 00:11:28.320 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Where there's just something like not it up and you and you're like fighting against yourself and only when you say it out loud to other human beings are you free of it. 72 00:11:28.740 --> 00:11:40.650 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And it's always awkward but it's like I knew I needed to do that so everyone's doing their shares and they're like talking about abundance and, like all like the stuff we're supposed to be talking about. 73 00:11:41.100 --> 00:11:49.560 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I, so I get the MIC and we're at this big giant live live edge wood table with this insane ocean view. 74 00:11:50.520 --> 00:12:06.090 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I get the MIC and, of course, my voice starts cracking immediately so i'm like into the MIC like I just feel like it's like so embarrassing voices like that, through this entire speech. 75 00:12:08.130 --> 00:12:09.090 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I just like. 76 00:12:09.330 --> 00:12:24.510 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): open to other them about like feeling so insecure and like showing up alone and feeling like those old feelings from like middle school of like. 77 00:12:24.960 --> 00:12:35.160 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know, it does my body look right like Am I wearing the right clothes, am I saying the right things like everybody knows each other they're already friends and i'm like I you know i'm like. 78 00:12:35.670 --> 00:12:46.170 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I don't know anyone so i'm kind of floating around and i'm like trying not to look like a weird outcast but i'm also trying not to intrude on other people's conversations like like just like being an absolute nutcase. 79 00:12:46.290 --> 00:12:47.790 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): In this like gorgeous. 80 00:12:48.390 --> 00:12:50.130 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): With this gorgeous backdrop. 81 00:12:50.610 --> 00:12:56.190 Jessica Rhodes: If you have not seen the instagram stories like imagine selling sunset It is like one of those mansions. 82 00:12:56.340 --> 00:13:08.460 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah and it's like and one of the lessons I think, is that, like, no matter how gorgeous scenery it's like what what is happening inside of you that's what matters like you could have a view of a dumpster and if you're in alignment. 83 00:13:08.880 --> 00:13:22.440 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's gonna be amazing and you can be in a gorgeous $35 million Villa and like battling old insecurities that you thought you were like 20 years away from experiencing. 84 00:13:22.860 --> 00:13:32.040 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): So I share all this in my like cracked voice, and it was so beautiful and by like being honest with people about how I was feeling. 85 00:13:32.400 --> 00:13:40.470 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I was able to actually connect with them people new group are tearing up people told me they felt the same way and I was like, and it was like. 86 00:13:40.890 --> 00:13:49.590 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I was like really because you look amazing and they were like you look amazing and I was like maybe we're all crazy and it was just so amazing. 87 00:13:50.250 --> 00:13:59.970 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so after I did that share Oh, you know what this was after the boat experience, so we did have that really cool but experience, which was really nice, but I still felt kind of weird and then. 88 00:14:01.230 --> 00:14:12.840 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): After I said that we you know we finished our food everybody's like milling around and rosie this really nice woman who was there comes up to me and she was like you know. 89 00:14:13.830 --> 00:14:22.800 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Today, when we were on the boat excursion I told you, I love your bathing suit it's like your style is so gorgeous and so unique. 90 00:14:23.250 --> 00:14:33.660 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And she had said this compliment at a normal volume of voice to me people around heard because they were they could hear that conversation they're like yeah I heard that. 91 00:14:34.080 --> 00:14:40.530 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I didn't answer her like it must have looked like I snapped her because I literally didn't hear it. 92 00:14:41.160 --> 00:14:56.040 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And that blew my mind, I was like I because I wasn't feeling confident in myself I literally physically could not hear the nice things that people were saying to me. 93 00:14:56.850 --> 00:15:01.140 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And that blew my fucking mind because it's like how much love. 94 00:15:01.410 --> 00:15:16.290 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): and...
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Nervous System Dysregulation and Partnership Breakthroughs
06/13/2022
Nervous System Dysregulation and Partnership Breakthroughs
In this episode, we nerd out on all things nervous system! We share more about nervous system co-regulation and how actually dysregulating each other’s nervous systems was the key to experiencing a quantum leap of personal growth. Links mentioned: Elisabeth’s previous podcast appearances on our show: Applied Neurology: Leadership and the Nervous System: Audio Transcript: Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): On this episode, we are going to be nurturing out on the nervous system and on some really deep work that dustin I have been doing together. 2 00:00:14.219 --> 00:00:25.410 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And then, with the help of Elizabeth Christoph who is our nervous system angel and the incredible breakthroughs that that work has really made available. 3 00:00:26.790 --> 00:00:37.170 Jessica Rhodes: yeah I have learned, I mean i'm embarrassed to say I really didn't know what the nervous system was until like a year or year and a half ago, I mean, I guess, I had heard the phrase, but I really didn't understand it. 4 00:00:37.530 --> 00:00:52.980 Jessica Rhodes: and Elizabeth has been on this podcast I think three times I interviewed her a couple of years ago, so definitely will link to these episodes in the show notes, so you can can listen she's been on marquees panels leadership and the nervous system panels. 5 00:00:54.030 --> 00:01:02.940 Jessica Rhodes: And i've just learned so much about the nervous system and it's helps me like experience the biggest breakthroughs i've ever had. 6 00:01:04.080 --> 00:01:12.330 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah, and the reason that elizabeth's work and she's legit she has been featured in forbes she's like we're clearly obsessed with her. 7 00:01:13.110 --> 00:01:24.480 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): We feature her every possible opportunity we both personally work with her, we have coaching clients work with her when they have something they need to process through their nervous system, like the level of. 8 00:01:25.140 --> 00:01:32.460 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Our trust in her and our love of her is like very, very high, because we don't take that lightly, who we work with and also who we send our clients to. 9 00:01:33.030 --> 00:01:46.110 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): So what I love about elizabeth's work is I think there's such a huge focus in the personal development space on these mindset emotional energetic up levels. 10 00:01:46.590 --> 00:01:59.250 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I love them they're amazing like I love them i've had so many like mindset and your feelings and your emotional guidance system, all that stuff is so real and so important. 11 00:01:59.970 --> 00:02:11.730 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And also, I felt that I personally and i've observed other people kind of hit a ceiling on how far I could go with just mindset and emotion and energy. 12 00:02:12.150 --> 00:02:19.680 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I really wasn't sure why until I learned more about the nervous system and the work that Elizabeth doing. 13 00:02:20.040 --> 00:02:35.760 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And realizing that my mind my energy my spirit was like leveling up like crazy, but no one had talked to my body about what we were doing and that resulted in. 14 00:02:36.180 --> 00:02:46.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Yes, migraines exhaustion fatigue, but also in me sort of like getting up to the ledge of doing this thing that I knew I should do in this leap of faith. 15 00:02:46.710 --> 00:02:52.020 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And backing off because the discomfort in my body was so intense. 16 00:02:52.470 --> 00:03:01.560 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I felt like I couldn't handle it, whether that was like you know super tight in the chest like shaking hands shaking voice like it was just like. 17 00:03:01.830 --> 00:03:15.630 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was like my body was like hell no and so i'm ready to show up powerfully and make this big move, and meanwhile i'm like shaking i'm like I have this week voice i'm like so tense, I can barely get the word out like. 18 00:03:15.990 --> 00:03:27.660 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And i'm like this in it like this any would make me back off because i'd be kind of honestly embarrassed because my body is not cooperating and I feel so powerful, I want to show up powerfully. 19 00:03:28.050 --> 00:03:36.120 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And then i'm showing up with so much fear in my body and people can feel that and I can feel that and it started messing with my mindset. 20 00:03:36.420 --> 00:03:50.220 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Because I would like go for these up levels, then I would have these reactions his old fear and stuff in my body, and I would back off because I would be like oh God it's too much Oh, it was like there was a fear. 21 00:03:50.520 --> 00:03:59.610 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Of the fear like feeling the discomfort in my body from the fear was so uncomfortable that I would back off and i'd be like okay I won't do it then. 22 00:03:59.940 --> 00:04:03.120 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And then I would be getting mad at myself for playing small. 23 00:04:03.510 --> 00:04:15.900 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But the threat response that my body was going through, it was like you're gonna die you're going to die is like you're not gonna die from going on Facebook live, but if your body is sure that you will. 24 00:04:16.290 --> 00:04:23.850 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It will feel really, really scary and your brains job as Elizabeth says, all the time, is to keep you safe so. 25 00:04:24.420 --> 00:04:27.510 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): This has been such a profound thing for me because. 26 00:04:27.930 --> 00:04:40.950 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's really allowed me to quantum leap because i've already done all this work i've like I mean i've processed, a lot of trauma i've done a lot of energetic work i've done so much mindset so much emotional guidance system stuff. 27 00:04:41.430 --> 00:04:50.970 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It was the body was really the last piece, for me, and by now learning how to work with my nervous system and get the nervous system on board and take that time. 28 00:04:51.240 --> 00:04:57.630 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): To be like hey here's what we're doing it's going to be safe and like doing the neuro drills and the tapping. 29 00:04:58.260 --> 00:05:07.920 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It the power and the grounding that I now have is absolutely incredible and I say that as someone who has a tendency to dissociate. 30 00:05:08.520 --> 00:05:15.300 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And when you dissociate you're not in your body and so getting in my body is a focus for me. 31 00:05:15.900 --> 00:05:24.480 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's it's always something that I have to be really mindful of and i'm like up in the head i'm like flying like let's do this. 32 00:05:24.990 --> 00:05:39.030 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Typical air sign if you're into astrology and my my Achilles heel is always grounding a lack of grounding and feeling safe in my body feeling safe grounding into my body. 33 00:05:39.450 --> 00:05:50.130 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): has made me so much more powerful as a leader as a mammal You know, as you know, we are, we are like. 34 00:05:50.910 --> 00:06:06.210 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): alpha apex predators as humans like and there's something when you bring that full power, not in an aggressive way in your body to all the other work you've done mentally it's fucking crazy are we allowed to swear on the spot. 35 00:06:06.780 --> 00:06:16.890 Jessica Rhodes: Now well well we'll have the explicit sign, but I feel like that's very fitting for a show with you, because we always put the little explicit emoji react in slack so. 36 00:06:17.250 --> 00:06:18.150 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): yeah i'm a big. 37 00:06:18.450 --> 00:06:24.030 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): fan of being explicit I always say I want to tell you explicitly what I want. 38 00:06:24.450 --> 00:06:26.040 there's no miscommunication. 39 00:06:27.420 --> 00:06:30.660 Jessica Rhodes: yeah I love, all of this, and you know. 40 00:06:31.680 --> 00:06:43.080 Jessica Rhodes: MARQuIS came to me recently and I alluded to this and I didn't lead to it, I said it in the last episode, but I want to dive more into this, I mean, are you why don't you share that side of story because yeah I want you to share. 41 00:06:43.350 --> 00:06:50.700 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Okay, so something was happening, where I was getting dis regulated, when I was talking to us. 42 00:06:51.090 --> 00:06:58.770 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And there, there are something we talked about last episode we'll talk about it this episode like mirroring and funding and stuff like that which is a trauma response. 43 00:06:59.070 --> 00:07:08.790 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): where you want someone to like you, or you want to connect with someone, but to do that, you try to be what you think they want or to mirror what they're doing. 44 00:07:09.060 --> 00:07:19.290 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): which can backfire right, because if people feel like you're being in authentic and you're kind of stepping on their toes and you're doing what they're doing but it doesn't feel like it's really authentic. 45 00:07:19.740 --> 00:07:28.530 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): It can dis regulate them right and they start to get like they don't know why but they're just getting this feeling around you have like I don't know like I don't know if I like this. 46 00:07:29.010 --> 00:07:42.840 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I was starting to get that feeling and especially stepping into the personal brand I was getting it more, because just was getting more regulated, understandably, I was also kind of just regulated, because it was scary to step out into this content. 47 00:07:43.950 --> 00:07:58.860 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I really wasn't working with my nervous system, yet at that point so i'm already I would say delicate nervous system, wise in this new situation and then justice dysregulation was like we were just. 48 00:07:58.890 --> 00:08:00.750 Jessica Rhodes: It was a thing out of 10. 49 00:08:01.380 --> 00:08:06.870 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And yeah and I, like the reason people, people are like, why do you have such a successful partnership and like. 50 00:08:07.620 --> 00:08:11.640 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): We are able to talk to each other about stuff that like. 51 00:08:12.090 --> 00:08:23.790 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You you would never talk to someone about like because I started and I started to think about susie so susie if you've heard past episodes i'll let just do the whole story, but she was like a friend in middle school and there was this. 52 00:08:24.120 --> 00:08:29.880 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Experience with her were in typical middle school girl on evolved fashion. 53 00:08:30.750 --> 00:08:31.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Like. 54 00:08:31.410 --> 00:08:38.400 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know pulled this kind of power move, where she stopped talking to just she brought the friend group with her to super traumatizing. 55 00:08:39.210 --> 00:08:45.330 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And, in some ways and justin I have talked about this, there are some parallels between me and susie. 56 00:08:46.320 --> 00:08:59.100 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Just like energy wise and like so it was really interesting because, as this, I was already a little wonky with my regulation because i'm stepping into this new level. 57 00:08:59.790 --> 00:09:07.260 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Just seems just regulated, I can tell that there's more like finding and mirroring which is making me feel smothered which is making me feel this regulated. 58 00:09:07.800 --> 00:09:21.720 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I started thinking about susie and we had done coaching we've worked with great coaches and you know both jess and I are quite familiar with each other, like middle school drama and we talked about it all the time with our coaches. 59 00:09:22.200 --> 00:09:26.490 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And I was like you know what I wonder if this happened with susie. 60 00:09:26.850 --> 00:09:34.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I wonder if susie was getting this regulated and, of course, a middle school girl is not going to be evolved enough to say. 61 00:09:34.500 --> 00:09:46.080 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know what I think you're just regulating my nervous system, can we talk through the trauma that we might be playing out together so that we can have a more aligned dynamic now middle school girls are bitches she was like by. 62 00:09:47.250 --> 00:09:57.300 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And like and she used her influence to create you know, the new situation that she wanted, which is what people do, especially in middle school. 63 00:09:57.690 --> 00:10:04.620 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): So it was really interesting though, because I realized, we had talked a lot with coaches about. 64 00:10:05.130 --> 00:10:13.080 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): The susie situation, but it was always the aftermath right, it was always like okay you've been abandoned and now there's this abandonment wound. 65 00:10:13.440 --> 00:10:22.860 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): How do we, you know build your self worth up, which is like fine but, honestly it's kind of superficial right, because if you don't get to the root of something. 66 00:10:23.100 --> 00:10:33.090 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You can layer affirmations all day long it's not gonna work it's not going to work at the level of your nervous system, and you can say I feel so much better, but people can tell that you don't so. 67 00:10:33.630 --> 00:10:51.990 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And that's not just just like i've done that too we've all done that, and then like i'm doing great and it's like maybe, so I realized we've never gone before the susie incident right before it right so we've always just said yeah like susie's a jerk middle school girls are. 68 00:10:51.990 --> 00:10:55.860 Jessica Rhodes: traumatized and if susie if you happen to be listening I forgive you and I love you very much. 69 00:10:56.910 --> 00:11:01.350 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): We understand what happened with your nervous system, we get it we're on the level with you. 70 00:11:03.030 --> 00:11:06.900 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): and honestly, as far as middle school girls got like truly no judgment. 71 00:11:07.590 --> 00:11:15.720 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's a savage time so yeah, but it was really I was like we've never gone we've never asked the question why did susie leave. 72 00:11:16.020 --> 00:11:22.140 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Because it's always been I think people are afraid to ask questions like that, personally, and one of the things I like to do coaching people. 73 00:11:22.530 --> 00:11:29.280 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Is ask those questions that other people are afraid to ask because it's it's hard to tell someone who's like Oh, I had this. 74 00:11:29.670 --> 00:11:39.570 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): You know, someone abandoned me it was so traumatizing it's pretty in your face to say like, why do you think they left you right like because it's not just there a terrible person. 75 00:11:40.050 --> 00:11:48.210 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Everybody as Elizabeth would say is acting on the level of their nervous system, everybody is doing the best that they can. 76 00:11:48.510 --> 00:11:58.380 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): And so, are there, people without empathy yes, there are, but the majority of people, they don't do things for no reason right, it might be their own reasons, it might be their own trauma and have nothing to do with you. 77 00:11:58.890 --> 00:12:09.270 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But, as I was getting this feeling I was like I wonder if there's something here that we should dig into about what drove susie away. 78 00:12:09.600 --> 00:12:18.240 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): and not in a blame way, and this is what I said to just it's very easy to go from a victim of like this person abandoned me because they're an asshole. 79 00:12:18.630 --> 00:12:23.250 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): To self blaming have they abandoned me because i'm unlovable and i'm terrible. 80 00:12:23.580 --> 00:12:32.160 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): Those are basically the same thing those feel like two different things that are two sides of the same coin So how do we take responsibility in a way that's like. 81 00:12:32.430 --> 00:12:43.140 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): What caused this result is there a way that I contributed to this and what did that look like, because we know it's not the answer is never going to be your own lovable like spoiler alert. 82 00:12:43.590 --> 00:12:45.690 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): If that's what you're getting you're very lovable. 83 00:12:46.350 --> 00:12:53.940 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's never that you're a bad person it's never that you're fundamentally unlovable you'll never be enough, I know you have those thoughts I know they feel real. 84 00:12:54.210 --> 00:13:02.940 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): it's never going to be that, so if we can rule that out, and we can rule out that that person is just a monster, then we can come into this middle space of. 85 00:13:03.240 --> 00:13:14.130 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): What might have happened here what energy did I bring into this situation that somebody else didn't want to be around, and I think it's so incredible. 86 00:13:14.850 --> 00:13:22.950 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): The way we manifest the people in our lives, that we need to learn these lessons and to get to the next level and, like. 87 00:13:23.250 --> 00:13:36.930 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I was joking, with just but it's kind of true she's manifested me who is like this evolved susie right like I was probably more of a Suzy maybe even meaner and middle school because I had a lot of problems. 88 00:13:37.260 --> 00:13:50.190 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): But i've done the therapy, I have processed my trauma I have done the personal growth work so whereas susie as a middle school girl, the level of her you know evolution all she could do was be like by like. 89 00:13:50.280 --> 00:14:05.580 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): An abandoned you, I am an adult who's done a lot of work, so it was so incredible that it's like you've manifested this version of susie who's evolved enough to not just be like by i'm going to abandon you but to really be like. 90 00:14:06.180 --> 00:14:15.300 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): what's going on here because I am feeling dis regulated by like the funding and the mirroring and I want to like dive into it. 91 00:14:16.410 --> 00:14:19.590 Jessica Rhodes: I love it you're like all that just told us, the story, and then you know so. 92 00:14:21.060 --> 00:14:22.230 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I OK. 93 00:14:22.350 --> 00:14:23.160 Jessica Rhodes: I know I like. 94 00:14:24.720 --> 00:14:26.820 Margy Feldhuhn (she/her): I was like i'll just defer to just but then I was...
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The Power of Stepping Into the Role That’s Right For You
06/06/2022
The Power of Stepping Into the Role That’s Right For You
In this episode, we share more about the journey of stepping into the roles that are right for us in our company and how stepping into the role that is right for you brings so much alignment and self-expression into your life. Resources mentioned:
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Happiness Matters
05/30/2022
Happiness Matters
In this episode, we’re sharing with you the recording of Margy’s panel discussion about how to create psychological safety within your organization. If you like this topic be sure to read Margy’s blog post about it ! Connect with Brandi Olson on LinkedIn and connect with Elisabeth Kristof on .
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Scrum and Agile
05/23/2022
Scrum and Agile
On today's episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess and Margy share more about their journey of transforming Interview Connections into a fully agile company using the Scrum methodology! 1. Working As A Team Makes It Easier for Individuals to Take Time Off with Less Stress 2. Interdepartmental Games of Telephone Waste Valuable Resources 3. Removing Individual Performance Metrics Lowers Stress and Allows Team Members to Focus on What’s Actually Important 4. Adjusting How Teams Approach Work Frees You From the Expensive and Ineffective Trap of Solving Problems With Addition 5. Working in Sprints Creates Rapid Improvement and Makes Big Changes Less Risky 6. Eliminating Top Down Decision Making is Good for Everyone 7. More Role Fluidity Helps Teams Thrive and Individuals Stay Engaged 8. Happiness Matters Want to learn more about leading an agile company? Read where she writes frequently about the journey!
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Why Am I So Tired?
05/16/2022
Why Am I So Tired?
On today's episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy and Jess discuss why entrepreneurs with decent schedules and pretty normal workloads are so tired. Things that appear small on the surface but really need to be talked about, toxic positivity, people pleasing, avoiding tough conversations and obstacles are all energy sucks that you should explore to see if they're draining you. When you're authentic and self expressed, you'll find that you feel way less drained.
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Is it Time to Demote Yourself?
05/09/2022
Is it Time to Demote Yourself?
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy and Jess are talking about how to know when it’s the right time to demote yourself (even if you’re a business owner or founder). When Jess founded the business, she called herself CEO, as most business owners and founders do. However, CEO is a very specific role and a lot of people who call themselves the CEO are not actually doing the work of a CEO, nor do they have the skills to. With Margy being the visionary and strategist in the business, it made much more sense for her to take on the title as she was already in the role and had the skills. In your business, it’s more important to have the right people in the right seats than to just look like you’re in a glamorous role. Margy also talks about how easy and trendy it is to be a business owner in general right now and how if you’re starting a business, you should ask yourself why you’re doing it and if you’re doing it for the right reasons.
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Replay: Suzy Ashworth's Episode of We Get It, Your Dad Died
05/02/2022
Replay: Suzy Ashworth's Episode of We Get It, Your Dad Died
On today's episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy shares the season 3 premiere episode of her podcast We Get It, Your Dad Died. The episode features an interview with entrepreneur Suzy Ashworth about how losing her parents impacted her life and career. Season 3 of We Get It, Your Dad Died goes live today, May 2, 2022! To listen to the rest of the season, find the show on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and Amazon.
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Optimizing Systems with Anne Hill
04/18/2022
Optimizing Systems with Anne Hill
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is joined by Interview Connections’ client Anne Hill. Anne has noticed there is a correlation between the health of a person and the health of their business and has founded Hilltop Virtual Solutions to help busy entrepreneurs automate and improve their systems so they can spend more time in their zone of genius. Anne discusses how she works with business owners to create new systems to improve their business’ health and function. She also goes into onboarding new team members, delegating tasks, and how she became an expert in operations and systems. To work with Anne, visit
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Maximizing Collaboration Opportunities with Adriana Monique Alvarez
04/11/2022
Maximizing Collaboration Opportunities with Adriana Monique Alvarez
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is joined by Interview Connections’ client and founder of AMA Publishing, Adriana Monique Alvarez. Adriana talks about creating impactful relationships in order to maximize your collaboration opportunities. Adriana gives tips for getting a broader perspective when it comes to getting to know potential clients, having patience and discipline to grow as a business owner, and implementing the value of relationships into everything you do. To learn more about Adriana’s work, go to her website
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Leadership & The Nervous System
04/04/2022
Leadership & The Nervous System
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, we are featuring a special replay of a Facebook live panel that Margy recently hosted on Leadership and the Nervous System. Joining Margy on the panel are Elisabeth Kristof and Brandi Olson. Elisabeth is the founder of Brain-Based Wellness, who helps entrepreneurs heal their past trauma by working with the nervous system, and Brandi, CEO of the Olson Group, who helps companies integrate agile strategy and organizational design into their organizations so they can thrive in times of change. This discussion is centered around the relationship between leadership, the nervous system, and how people can better understand their nervous system and its responses in order to become more effective, happier leaders. Check out Elisabeth’s work at brainbased-wellness.com and Brandi’s at helloolson.com
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How to Simplify Your Call to Action
03/28/2022
How to Simplify Your Call to Action
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is giving you some prompts to help you simplify your call to action. These prompts include listing out 5 of your best clients, how they found you, what their journey was like signing up with you, what the next intentional step is for a host or listener to take to ultimately sign up with you, and whether or not you are utilizing your email list. Listing out the answers to these questions will lead you to create your perfect call to action!
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Creating Your Interview Topics & Questions
03/21/2022
Creating Your Interview Topics & Questions
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is talking about how to write your interview topics and questions for your one sheet. A one sheet is a tool that is used to help you get booked for a podcast interview and gives hosts a sense of what value you can provide to their audience and also can act as a guide while interviewing you. In this episode, Jess gives you some prompts to help you identify what your most valuable interview topics are.
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Lessons Learned from Year One of Coaching
03/14/2022
Lessons Learned from Year One of Coaching
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess and Margy are sharing what they’ve learned after one year of running their group coaching program. Whether or not you have an agency or one on one business, you can add a group coaching program into what you’re already doing. It took a long time for Jess and Margy to pull the trigger on starting this program out of fear that nobody would sign up for it, even though they already had an accomplished and established business offering another service. Margy and Jess list out some questions you should ask yourself before you decide to create a new offering in your business in order to set yourself and potential new program up for success.
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The Paradox of More
03/07/2022
The Paradox of More
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess and Margy are talking about the paradox of more. The paradox of more has been coming up in the business over and over again and Margy realized that some problems don’t need to be solved with addition, but instead by leveraging the resources the business already has. Instead of buying more leads to get more sales, Margy realized they already had so many leads and the sales team was already sitting on gold. The team started to ask different questions in order to tap into the potential of the leads they already accumulated, rather than just buying more. Jess also discusses how this can apply to podcast guesting and shares an example of how she helped a client do more with the interviews she already had. Multiplying instead of adding can do amazing things for your business and can definitely help you get the most out of your team.
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How to Incorporate an Online Course Into Your Offerings with Melissa Guller
02/28/2022
How to Incorporate an Online Course Into Your Offerings with Melissa Guller
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is joined by Melissa Guller, who helps business owners turn their skills into online courses. If you find yourself answering the same question time after time, it might make sense for you to create an online course. Melissa goes over the differences between creating an online course on a website such as Skillshare versus Teachable, what content to include in your course, how to figure out your pricing, and how to think of TikTok as a raffle ticket. Get in touch with Melissa at or on social media @witandwire
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How to Use Press Releases to Gain Visibility with Mickie Kennedy
02/21/2022
How to Use Press Releases to Gain Visibility with Mickie Kennedy
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is talking with Mickie Kennedy about using press releases to gain visibility. Mickie is an Interview Connections client and helps small business owners, authors, and startups increase their visibility and credibility with press releases. If you commit to doing a press release strategy, a business owner can see all kinds of returns ranging from new leads, getting articles in major publications, to millions of dollars in revenue (and Mickie can attest to that). In this interview, Mickie goes over the most effective way to use press releases in order to make the most out of the strategy. To work with Mickie, head over to
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How to Bring "Doing Good" and "Making Money" Back Together
02/14/2022
How to Bring "Doing Good" and "Making Money" Back Together
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess and Margy are talking with Co-Founder of Benefit Capital, Bessi Graham. Recently, Bessi helped Margy realize that there are many ways that businesses can give back that don’t include just giving to charity. There are so many options for business owners to use their resources in order to make an impact within their own company. You can make a big change in your business by basing your thinking, behavior, and decision making on your values (how you pay your employees and what kind of conditions and culture they work in, etc). If you are clear on your own values (really strong reflections on who we are), then it is much easier to be decisive as a leader. And at the end of the day, you are a business owner and not the leader of a nonprofit so you ultimately need to make decisions as a business owner so you can still be financially sustainable. There are more ways to be a generous, decent human that don't include giving everything away for free. Connect with Bessi on social media at and
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How We Got to a $500k Month
02/07/2022
How We Got to a $500k Month
In today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy and Jess talk about how they got Interview Connections to its first $500k revenue month. In 2019, Margy set a goal for the company to have a $500k month and thought it would take maybe six months to achieve it…but it took two years. Finally, in December 2021, Interview Connections not only hit $500k, but finished the month at almost $600k. Throughout this episode, Margy and Jess share all of the invaluable lessons they’ve learned during the time that it took to hit this revenue goal. These lessons include hitting big goals by multiplication (not addition), leading by example, restructuring what you’re already doing, and persistence.
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You Can Do Better with Vasavi Kumar
01/31/2022
You Can Do Better with Vasavi Kumar
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is talking with Vasavi Kumar, a self-expression and confidence coach. Vasavi used to hate herself: she had to confront the ugliest parts of herself when she decided to conquer her addiction to cocaine, and how she has an amazing life and business helping others do better. Vasavi wants people to learn how to soothe themselves because when people feel soothed and safe, they have much more confidence and make better decisions. She also tells the story of recently performing her first standup comedy set, what happened to her nervous system during her set, and the importance of being exposed and vulnerable in front of people she was afraid of. So, what are you so afraid of? Connect with Vasavi at her Camera Confident Accelerator beginning in March! To sign up, go to
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Asking the Right Questions with Isaac and Natasha Ho
01/24/2022
Asking the Right Questions with Isaac and Natasha Ho
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is joined by Isaac and Natasha Ho. Isaac and Natasha are clients of Interview Connections and your classic business power couple. In this interview, they share why they decided to get booked on podcasts and also discuss the results they have seen from podcast guesting. They both have a curious approach when it comes to having conversations with people in business and the hosts who interview them and know the right questions to ask. These questions end up prompting discussions that often lead to people deciding they want to work with Isaac and Natasha. Isaac and Natasha both have a commitment to serve and they make it abundantly clear before, during, and after their podcast interviews. Connect with Isaac and Natasha at
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How Steve Wiideman Closed a $60k Agency Client from Podcast Guesting
01/17/2022
How Steve Wiideman Closed a $60k Agency Client from Podcast Guesting
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess is talking with Interview Connections client Steve Wiideman of Wiideman Consulting Group. Steve has achieved some incredible results with podcast guesting including improved SEO, great relationships, and earning a huge amount of revenue. Additionally, Steve is currently in communication with 60 leads that he has gained from his interviews and has gotten about $250,000 in value from podcast guesting on relatively small shows. Connect with Steve on social at @SEOSteve or send him an email at steve [at] wiideman.com (he reads every single email!).
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Replay: Elisabeth Kristof's Episode of We Get It, Your Dad Died
01/10/2022
Replay: Elisabeth Kristof's Episode of We Get It, Your Dad Died
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy is sharing an episode from the most recent season of her podcast We Get It, Your Dad Died. This episode features an interview with Elisabeth Kristof of Brain Based Wellness. She is an expert in the nervous system and the information she shares in this episode can be relevant to business owners who are ready to take the next step, but are being held back by limiting beliefs. “What if the things you feel most shame about have nothing to do with who you are as a person? This episode offers the most powerful gift of all; freedom from shame and self loathing. In this finale episode of Season 2, we break from the norm. This conversation doesn’t feature a death, but is one of the most profound and valuable conversations I’ve ever had. We went deep into topics like codependency, binge eating, self harm and boundaries. Elisabeth Kristof shares incredible wisdom that will make you rethink everything you thought you knew about trauma, grief and those negative habits that seem to keep playing out in your life, no matter how much you try to change. When you look at your “toxic traits” through the lens of a dysregulated nervous system, you are suddenly free to drop the self judgment and shame and create a new possibility. Elisabeth also offers actionable tips to get regulated and start healing right away. No matter who you are or what you’ve done, this episode will bring you peace. Learn more about Elisabeth's work at and check out her video drills to help you regulate your central nervous system when you're experiencing stress.”
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How to Nurture Your Leads from Podcasts with Social Selling featuring Ryann Dowdy
01/03/2022
How to Nurture Your Leads from Podcasts with Social Selling featuring Ryann Dowdy
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Jess interviews Interview Connections client Ryann Dowdy about how to nurture your podcast leads using the power of social media. Ryann has recently combined her sales methodology with Kelly Roach’s in order to create the Social Sellers Academy. Ryann explains how people need to see more of you in order to pay attention to you. Business owners need to create more content and post more and more in order to create familiarity because people buy from those they know, like, and trust. When you guest on podcasts, you create the trust factor, but how do you create the know and like? One way is to make it part of your workflow every couple of weeks to connect with podcast hosts who have interviewed you by sending a DM, replying to their stories, etc. Don’t just reply with an emoji either, make it a genuine, personal connection! Two things to consider when creating these connections: people love to hear their names and people love talking about themselves. Rather than saying “Hey girl” at the beginning of a DM, address someone by their name (or preferred nickname if applicable). And the first thing you should say in the DM? Something about them! Think of something they’ve recently shared on social or on their website and acknowledge it. Connect with Ryann at , on Instagram @SocialSellersAcademy , or on LinkedIn or Facebook (Ryann Dowdy).
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Your Business Isn't Sustainable...And That's Okay
12/27/2021
Your Business Isn't Sustainable...And That's Okay
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy and Jess discuss why your business isn’t sustainable and why that’s not entirely a bad thing. After a coaching client came to the realization that her business wasn’t sustainable, she began to panic. But your business not being sustainable is just a part of the growth journey. There are always parts of your business that aren’t sustainable, but entrepreneurs should constantly be evolving their businesses and consider those areas places to grow rather than a death sentence for their companies.
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Top 5 CEO Lessons from 2021
12/20/2021
Top 5 CEO Lessons from 2021
On today’s episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy is sharing her top five CEO lessons from 2021. Margy and Jess talk about the importance of asking questions to advocate for your own clarity, being a stand for your own excellence (even when it’s annoying), giving yourself a bird’s eye view (even when you’re in it), getting really honest with yourself about where and how you’re showing up as a leader, and not crumbling. Learning all of these lessons over the past year have not only made Margy a better leader, but have also improved the results and performance of the entire team. Email us at support[at]interviewconnections.com to let us know what you’ve learned as a CEO this year. Follow us on Instagram @interviewconnections
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Dangerous Truisms
12/13/2021
Dangerous Truisms
On today's episode of Monetize the Mic, Margy and Jess are talking about the power of just taking the leap and implementing something, even if it's not perfect right now. "Do it, even if it's sloppy" is not universally good advice for every situation, but for some systems and strategies, you can implement now and clean up later without any major repercussions. You do need to be mindful and able to distinguish what advice is right for you in your business. Margy also shares some common dangerous truisms that you should be mindful of.
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