The Surviving Siblings®
Maya Roffler created The Surviving Siblings® after losing her brother Andreas to homicide in 2016 — a loss that changed her life forever. In the painful years that followed, she discovered what so many grieving siblings silently endure: while there are resources for parents who lose a child, support for surviving siblings is almost nonexistent. The grief of losing a brother or sister is profound, yet often invisible. This podcast was created to change that. Through honest storytelling, Maya shares her journey through sibling loss and invites other surviving siblings to share theirs. Together, they open up conversations about grief, love, healing, and hope — offering comfort to those navigating life after this unimaginable loss. Whether someone has lost a sibling or wants to support someone who has, The Surviving Siblings® is a safe space where grief is honored, love is remembered, and no one has to feel alone.
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Earla Loses Leigh-Ann To Pancreatic Cancer
02/25/2026
Earla Loses Leigh-Ann To Pancreatic Cancer
On Season 9, Episode 2 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host Maya Roffler is joined by Earla Dawn, who shares the story of losing her sister, Leigh-Ann, to pancreatic cancer. Earla takes us back to their childhood on the prairies, four siblings, endless fun, and the kind of relationship that started with “fighting like cats and dogs”… and grew into a deep, lifelong bond. Leigh-Ann was the polished one, the “always put together” sister, a devoted mom, a dog lover, and a woman who reinvented her life, starting over after divorce, and eventually moving across the world to Spain in 2006. Even with an ocean between them, their connection never faded. They learned Skype, relied on phone calls and letters, and stayed emotionally close until a fall visit home revealed something no one was prepared for: a growth on Leigh-Ann’s pancreas. What followed was a short, devastating season filled with advocacy, tenderness, quiet courage, and moments of unexpected beauty. This episode is a powerful reminder that grief isn’t just about the diagnosis or the timeline it’s about the small moments you carry forever: the way you follow your sibling’s lead, the calm you create for them, the love in the room, and the way connection can exist even without words. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Earla and Remembering Leigh-Ann Earla shares their family dynamic, childhood memories, and how their relationship evolved over time. (0:01:30) – From the Prairies to Spain: A Sisterhood That Stayed Close Leigh-Ann’s big life moves, her reinvention, and how distance didn’t break their bond. (0:04:00) – Subtle Symptoms and the Turning Point Leigh-Ann’s ongoing stomach issues, declining stamina, and the moment she learned about the pancreatic growth. (0:06:30) – “I Looked It Up Once… and Never Again” Earla reflects on the shock of Dr. Google, the fear that followed, and what she learned about living day-by-day. (0:08:00) – The Worst Day: “It’s All Over” An oncologist appointment confirms the terminal diagnosis and Earla shares why not having an exact end date changed everything. (0:09:30) – Following Leigh-Ann’s Lead Earla explains how she honored Leigh-Ann’s choices, advocated for information, and created a calm, sacred space at home. (0:11:30) – Palliative Support and the Permission of Time The practical support that helped their family breathe and why planning ahead reduced panic later. (0:14:00) – The List for Life (Not a Bucket List) Leigh-Ann’s wishes: connection, warmth, marriage, travel and the decision to take a “honeymoon” to Hawaii. (0:17:30) – Love, Humor, and the Moments That Stay Earla shares an unforgettable experience of wordless connection laughing together in the quiet. (0:20:00) – Her Final Days and a Peaceful Death What it looked like, what helped, and why Earla believes we need to talk more honestly about end-of-life moments. (0:22:30) – A Room Full of Love: Ritual, Meditation, and Goodbye Earla guides a meditation after Leigh-Ann’s passing and describes the gentle, meaningful way they honored her. (0:26:00) – Grace in Grief: Caring for Yourself While Losing Your Person Earla shares what “giving yourself grace” looked like in real life including rest, boundaries, and self-trust. (0:31:00) – Zines, Creativity, and Finding a Way Forward How small, simple storytelling (zines) became an accessible form of grief processing and a bridge back to hope. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Earla: Instagram: Earla’s Book: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Stephen Loses Stacy To A Car Accident
02/11/2026
Stephen Loses Stacy To A Car Accident
On episode 1 of Season 9 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast® host, Maya Roffler is joined by Stephen Stott who opens up about the tragic loss of his sister, Stacy, to a car accident 24 years ago. Stephen was just 16 when his life changed forever. After being "voluntold" to accompany his sister to a cheerleading camp six hours away, he shared a moment of deep personal truth with her the first person he ever came out to as queer. Just days later, on the drive home, they both fell asleep behind the wheel. Stacy didn’t survive. Stephen did. What follows is a deeply moving story of grief, identity, movement, and healing. Stephen shares how he turned toward dance, breathwork, and somatic healing not only to honor Stacy’s memory but to help others process grief in their own bodies. He also reflects on his decision to found Embrace the Darkness, a platform and resource space that embraces the hard and sacred work of grief, especially for queer siblings and those needing support outside of traditional therapy. This episode is about so much more than loss. It’s about grief in the body, safe spaces for queer siblings, and what it means to move with your grief instead of away from it. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Stephen and Remembering Stacy Stephen shares who Stacy was, their sibling bond through movement, and the moment that changed everything. (0:04:00) – Movement as Medicine: Honoring Stacy Through Dance Stephen describes how continuing cheer, gymnastics, and dance helped him stay close to his sister and move through grief. (0:05:00) – Coming Out and Catastrophe: The Last Conversation Stephen tells the powerful story of coming out to his sister just days before the fatal car accident. It was the first time he told anyone he liked boys. (0:06:30) – The Car Accident and Immediate Aftermath He recalls the surreal moment of waking up in the hospital, already knowing deep in his bones that Stacy was gone. (0:08:00) – Back to School, No Time to Grieve Just a week after the accident, Stephen was thrown back into high school, sports, and work using distraction to survive. (0:11:00) – Survivor Guilt, Queer Identity, and Grieving Alone Stephen reflects on how his queer identity shaped his grief and how he struggled to find representation and resources. (0:14:00) – Why Queer Grief Spaces Are Essential Maya and Stephen dive into why queer-specific grief groups matter, and how judgment—even within sibling spaces can create harm. (0:21:00) – The Turning Point at 21: A Grief Conference Shifts Everything Stephen’s mother encouraged him to attend a grief conference, where a simple dance skit helped him feel seen and opened a path toward healing. (0:25:00) – Becoming a Social Worker and Healing Through Service Stephen shares how his desire to help others evolved into a career in social work and ultimately into his grief-centered platform. (0:27:00) – Founding Embrace the Darkness He explains why toxic positivity doesn’t work, and how this powerful name emerged from his belief that we must sit with the dark to truly heal. (0:43:00) – Parasympathetic Nervous System & Breathwork as Reset Maya and Stephen discuss how breathwork activates the vagus nerve and helps shift the body from chaos to calm. (0:47:00) – The Mission Moving Forward Stephen talks about his workshops, his work with siblings globally, and his dream to bring more somatic healing into the grief world. About Embrace the Darkness Stephen is the founder of Embrace The Darkness, a platform that provides breathwork, sibling grief support, and LGBTQ+-affirming spaces for healing. Stephen is starting a 6-month program and is offering $1,000 off for any surviving sibling. The unspoken path community discount: This episode is sponsored by Embrace The Darkness Connect with Stephen: Facebook: Instagram: Email: Website: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Chelsey McHale Interviews Maya Roffler On Sibling Loss
12/10/2025
Chelsey McHale Interviews Maya Roffler On Sibling Loss
On episode 10 of season 8 of The Surviving Siblings® Podcast, guest host Chelsey McHale takes over the mic to interview podcast founder and host Maya Roffler in a deeply personal and reflective conversation. With 2026 marking 10 years since the loss of her brother Andreas, Maya opens up about what this milestone means to her, how her grief has evolved, and the legacy her brother continues to leave behind through this powerful community. From the early days of navigating violent loss to founding the podcast, the summit, and a thriving support network, Maya shares what she’s learned from interviewing over 70 siblings, including her own personal growth, struggles, healing, and mission. This candid and vulnerable episode is a must-listen for anyone feeling stuck in grief, facing complex sibling loss, or wondering how to honor their loved one with grace, authenticity, and community. In This Episode: [00:00–03:00] Anniversary Reflections & Feeling the Weight of Year 10 Maya shares her emotions around approaching the 10-year anniversary of Andreas’s death, the pressure that comes with milestones, and the peace she feels from honoring him every day. [03:00–07:00] How Maya Stays Spiritually Connected to Andreas From sunflowers and champagne to nature walks and old episodes of The Office, Maya shares the personal rituals that bring her comfort and connection. [07:00–12:00] Signs From Andreas & Spiritual Moments She talks about powerful signs—from sunflowers in strange places to her dog Bonnie—and the deep belief that our loved ones are always with us. [12:00–17:00] Fear of Forgetting Their Voice Maya addresses a common fear among grieving siblings: “What if I forget what they sounded like?” She discusses how memory, dreams, and digital archives play a role. [32:00–37:00] Holding Onto the Bond Without Feeling Stuck What does it really mean to “move forward” without “moving on”? Maya explains how honoring your sibling is healthy and how to combat the pressure of getting “unstuck.” [37:00–43:00] Parent Grief vs. Sibling Grief Maya addresses one of the most asked questions: “How do I grieve when I have to be strong for my parents?” She challenges grief hierarchy and gives permission to prioritize your healing. [43:00–47:00] Does It Get Easier? Maya’s Most Frequent Question Her honest answer: yes and no. Maya breaks down why grief evolves, how the pain shifts, and what healing can look like years later. [53:00–58:00] Balancing Your Grief with Your Parents' Pain She dives into the invisible pressure placed on siblings to suppress their grief in favor of their parents—and why that has to change. [58:00–1:03:00] The Surviving Siblings Summit: Goals & Vision Maya gives a behind-the-scenes look at the summit’s evolution, why virtual events matter, and the future of this movement—including a possible retreat. [1:03:00–1:12:00] The Power of Community & Friendship in Grief Chelsey and Maya close with reflections on their friendship, the healing power of this community, and why this show exists: to keep sibling stories alive. Listen to the full episode of “Chelsey McHale Interviews Maya Roffler On Sibling Loss” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Chelsey: Instagram: Tiktok: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Katherine Loses Colin To Cancer
11/26/2025
Katherine Loses Colin To Cancer
On episode 9 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler sits down with Katherine Mandzak, a writer and advocate, as she opens up about losing her beloved younger brother Colin to a rare and aggressive form of bile duct cancer. From growing up as inseparable homeschool siblings to navigating a shocking cancer diagnosis, Katherine shares the raw reality of becoming the only surviving sibling and how her identity, grief, and life path were forever changed. She walks us through the six-month rollercoaster from diagnosis to hospice, the sacred final moments, and the silence that followed. With powerful vulnerability, Katherine discusses anticipatory grief, the weight of being “the strong one,” the unexpected beauty of sibling love, and how writing became her lifeline through it all. This episode is a must-listen for anyone facing sibling loss, complicated grief, or struggling to find themselves in the aftermath. In This Episode: [00:00–03:00] Childhood Bond & Homeschooling Katherine reflects on growing up closely with Colin—just the two of them, homeschooled and always side by side. [03:00–05:00] Staying Connected Through the College Years Despite being nearly five years apart, the two remained close with frequent check-ins, music events, and road trips. [05:00–07:00] The First Health Scare Colin complains of gallstone-like pain within hours, he’s in the ER and yellow with jaundice. [07:00–10:00] The Diagnosis That Changed Everything On Katherine’s 28th birthday, they learn it’s bile duct cancer. The rare and aggressive nature becomes clear and hope turns to urgency. [10:00–13:00] Shock, Dissociation, and the Urge to “Hold It Together” Katherine opens up about the emotional shutdown she experienced during Colin’s treatment, trying to be strong for everyone else. [14:00–16:00] Hopes for a Liver Transplant The family explores living donor options, but everyone, including Katherine and their mother, is ruled out. [16:00–18:00] A Devastating Update Colin shares he has “a year left,” but Katherine later learns he only had six months. She speaks candidly about the anger and betrayal of that timeline. [18:00–21:00] The Final Days: Hospice & Sacred Space As the new year begins, Colin enters hospice. Katherine describes visiting him every weekend and witnessing moments where “he had one foot in each world.” [21:00–24:00] 2AM Goodbye She recalls the night Colin passed surrounded by silence and stillness and the powerful hug from her father that became a memory etched in time. [24:00–26:00] A Brother’s Hidden Love At the memorial, Colin’s friends tell Katherine how much he talked about her redefining how she saw their bond. [33:00–39:00] Healing, Boundaries, and Becoming Herself Katherine found her voice again through therapy and creativity. She now embraces who she is forever changed, but healing. [39:00–44:00] Conversations About the Future As the only surviving sibling, she’s now navigating conversations around caregiving, children, and long-term planning with her parents. [44:00–47:00] How Her Husband Showed Up Katherine highlights her husband’s quiet strength, especially during the memorial where he read for Colin. Listen to the full episode of “Katherine Loses Colin To Cancer” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Katherine: Facebook: Twitter/X: Tumblr: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Dan Loses Patti To Appendicitis
11/12/2025
Dan Loses Patti To Appendicitis
On episode 8 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler speaks with Dan Dunsmore, a devoted brother, father, and educator who shares the heartbreaking story of losing his sister Patti at just 13 years old to a sudden and misdiagnosed case of appendicitis. Dan takes us back to 1968 in South Knoxville, Tennessee, and walks us through the idyllic beginnings of his childhood, followed by a series of devastating family losses, each one reshaping the course of his life. Dan opens up about the traumatic last words he spoke to Patti, the moment he found himself alone in a suddenly silent house, and how grief compounded as he later lost both parents and eventually his beloved older sister, Libby. Now decades into his healing journey, Dan shares the long-term impact of losing a sibling young, the power of therapy, and the divine full-circle love story of reconnecting with Patti’s childhood best friend—who is now his wife. This episode is a powerful testament to resilience, love, and finding meaning in pain. In This Episode: [00:00–02:00] Childhood Memories in South Knoxville Dan describes growing up in South Knoxville in the late 1960s — an idyllic childhood filled with freedom, neighborhood adventures, and sibling connection. He and Patti were two years apart and inseparable, forming a tight bond that shaped his early life. [03:00–06:00] Patti Falls Ill What started as a cold became something far more serious. Dan recalls watching his sister’s illness worsen as doctors struggled to diagnose her. When she was hospitalized, he thought she was seeking attention — and the last words he said to her haunt him to this day. [06:00–08:00] The Day Everything Changed Patti’s appendix ruptured, leading to her death on the operating table. Dan was only 13 years old. He recalls the phone call, his mother’s sobs, and being left alone in the quiet house, unaware that his sister was gone. [08:00–11:00] The Empty House & Lasting Trauma Dan shares how that eerie silence imprinted on him — even now, decades later, he can’t sit in silence without sound in the background. That empty house moment became a lifelong trauma trigger, symbolizing loss and isolation. [13:00–16:00] The Dream Visit from Patti Patti came to Dan in a dream. Dressed in the same outfit she was buried in, she simply said, “I’m okay. I’m okay.” That dream became a lifelong source of peace, convincing Dan that love transcends death. [18:00–21:00] Losing Faith & Clinging to Hope Dan recalls sleeping with a Bible in bed for weeks after Patti’s passing. Though not deeply religious, he needed something to hold onto — faith, comfort, and the feeling that Patti was still close. [21:00–24:00] Two Years Later: Losing His Father Just two years after Patti’s death, Dan’s father suffered a fatal heart attack — a loss he attributes partly to heartbreak. His mother spiraled into depression, leaving Dan to navigate grief, instability, and survival at just 15. [25:00–29:00] Family Collapse & Survival Mode Dan refused to leave his mother’s side even as his older siblings took in his baby sister, Cindy. His loyalty kept him in a house full of pain, where he often became the caretaker for his grieving mother. [30:00–33:00] His Mother’s Suicide Attempt Dan bravely opens up about the night his mother attempted suicide while he was out on a date. Though she survived, it reinforced his fear of abandonment — and his determination to never leave her again. [37:00–41:00] Therapy Breakthrough: Decades Later It wasn’t until 30 years later — during his divorce — that Dan began therapy and discovered a life-changing insight: his daughter was the same age Patti was when she died. He realized he was reliving that trauma. [42:00–44:00] Rebuilding & Finding Love Again Years later, Dan reconnected with Murph — Patti’s childhood best friend. What began as holiday cards turned into a love story. Today, she’s his wife, and they honor Patti’s memory together. [48:00–52:00] Losing Libby: Another Sibling Gone Dan shares the loss of his older sister Libby in 2010 and her miraculous life story. Born with a severe spinal issue, doctors never expected her to walk — yet she lived fully, loved deeply, and became a mother figure to everyone around her. [53:00–55:00] Lessons from Libby & Final Reflections Libby never ended a call without saying, “I love you.” Dan urges listeners: never wait to say it. Tell your siblings, your parents, your friends — you love them. You never know when it’ll be the last time. Listen to the full episode of “Dan Loses Patti To Appendicitis” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Dan: Facebook: Instagram: Email: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Dawn Loses Justin To Suicide
10/29/2025
Dawn Loses Justin To Suicide
On episode 7 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler sits down with Dawn, a surviving sibling who opens up about the unexpected loss of her brother Justin, just weeks before his wedding day. Dawn shares the full arc of their sibling bond, from pranks and family laughter, to the hidden pain Justin carried, to the shock of losing him to suicide in 2013. Through her storytelling, Dawn brings light to the complexities of grief, sibling guilt, the impact of hidden addiction and gambling, and the long road toward healing. This conversation is a tribute to Justin, a celebration of Dawn’s strength, and a resource for anyone navigating the grief of suicide loss. She also shares how her daughter Justine, born later, became a symbol of healing and joy. In This Episode: [0:00] – Meet Dawn & Her Brother Justin Dawn introduces her family, sharing about her close-knit childhood with her two brothers, including the deep bond she had with Justin, her "twin in spirit." [2:00] – Living with Visual Impairment & Justin’s Support She opens up about growing up with congenital nystagmus, and how Justin always treated her with love and equality—never seeing her as disabled. [5:00] – Prank Wars & Wedding Shenanigans From pranking their brother Jason to orchestrating a hilarious wedding garter joke, Dawn reflects on how laughter defined their sibling connection. [7:00] – Health Challenges & Justin’s Shift Dawn explains how Justin’s life took a turn after a medical issue ended his athletic dreams, which may have led to a spiral of hidden struggles. [10:00] – The Call That Changed Everything In May 2013, Dawn receives a devastating call: Justin was found in the woods by their father. He had died by suicide, just one month before his wedding. [13:00] – Processing the Shock Dawn recounts the overwhelming grief, the small details that haunted her (like how Justin’s smile was missing in his casket), and how she stepped into her “eldest sibling” role to hold the family together. [17:00] – The Unraveling Begins After the funeral, the family begins discovering secrets Justin had kept hidden—dropping out of college, gambling debts, and signs of silent struggle. [23:00] – Navigating Family Shame & Speaking the Truth Dawn candidly discusses how her family wanted to hide the cause of death, but how speaking up and honoring the truth helped her begin to heal. [26:00] – Grief, Guilt & a Mud Run Gone Wrong On what would’ve been Justin’s wedding day, Dawn attempted to mask her grief with a mud run—but broke her ankle, lost her job, and spiraled into depression. The symbolic “fall” marked a breaking point in her grief journey. [29:00] – Naming Her Daughter After Justin A year later, Dawn gave birth to her third child, Justine Brianna, named after her brother. From her left-handedness to her smile, Justine became a living tribute and source of healing for the family. [32:00] – Pregnant in Grief: The Duality of Joy & Loss Dawn shares what it was like to grieve while pregnant—balancing immense sorrow with the hope of new life, and the bittersweet beauty of motherhood after loss. [34:00] – Six Years Later: The Weight of Untold Grief In 2019, six years after Justin's death, Dawn broke her silence—not in therapy, but in a surprising place: a Weight Watchers meeting. Talking about her grief helped her shed both emotional and physical weight. [43:00] – The Power of Community in Grief Whether it’s a podcast, support group, or a wellness meeting, Dawn emphasizes the importance of community when grieving a sibling. Talking changed everything. Listen to the full episode of “Dawn Loses Justin To Suicide” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Dawn: Email: mfwbookkeeper@aol.com Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Tommy Loses John To Addiction & Tim To Cancer
10/15/2025
Tommy Loses John To Addiction & Tim To Cancer
On episode 6 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler sits down with Tommy, a surviving sibling who lost two brothers—John to addiction and Tim to cancer. Tommy shares a powerful testimony of family, trauma, guilt, grief, and recovery offering a rare and vulnerable glimpse into what it means to survive sibling loss from two very different but equally devastating causes. Raised in Queens, New York, Tommy opens up about growing up in a family marked by love, loyalty, and generational addiction. He candidly recounts the progression of his brother John's substance use following a workplace injury and the day he tragically discovered his brother unresponsive. Just two days later, Tommy’s beloved Aunt Angela, like a second mother to him, died by suicide. Years later, after achieving long-term sobriety, Tommy would face unimaginable grief again, this time, losing his twin brother Tim to 9/11-related cancer after witnessing his hard-fought battle to get sober. With 30+ years of recovery, Tommy now dedicates his life to helping families through his organization, Sober Companion Los Angeles, supporting others impacted by addiction and loss. This episode holds space for anyone navigating complex grief, guilt, and healing after losing a sibling to addiction, overdose, or cancer—and reminds us that asking for help is an act of strength. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Tommy and His Family in Queens Tommy introduces his close-knit, working-class New York family, their upbringing in Queens, and the presence of generational addiction beginning with his parents. (0:02:00) – Early Drinking, Generational Patterns, and Family Dynamics He shares how his father’s alcoholism shaped his childhood and how both he and his brothers began drinking in adolescence. (0:05:00) – John’s Injury, Prescription Pills, and Spiraling Addiction Tommy recalls the moment his brother was prescribed opioids after a construction injury, which rapidly escalated into addiction. (0:09:00) – The Day Everything Changed Tommy recounts in vivid detail the day he and his father found John unconscious, brought him home, and later discovered he had died of an overdose. (0:11:00) – Guilt, Grief, and a Second Tragedy Two days after John’s death, their Aunt Angela, who helped raise them died by suicide, compounding the trauma and sorrow for the entire family. (0:14:00) – The Emotional Fallout and Drinking Resumes Tommy shares how he relapsed after John’s death and reflects on the toll it took on both his parents and his own mental health. (0:18:00) – Twin Bond and Tim’s Role in His Healing He describes the twin bond he shared with Tim, how they held each other up in the wake of loss, and how the absence of John left a deep void. (0:20:00) – Tommy’s Turning Point and Path to Sobriety After years of drinking and legal trouble, Tommy made the decision to get sober in 1994—walking into a 12-step meeting and never looking back. (0:27:00) – Tim’s Parallel Journey and Struggles While Tommy stayed sober, Tim continued to struggle with alcohol for years, finally making progress in late 2019 after joining a recovery program. (0:28:00) – 9/11, First Response, and a Cancer Diagnosis Tommy shares how Tim responded to the September 11 attacks, working at Ground Zero—and how years later, he was diagnosed with 9/11-related cancer. (0:33:00) – Hospitalization, Final Days, and the Last Promise Tommy recounts Tim’s rapid decline, the powerful final conversations they shared, and the promise he made at his brother’s bedside before removing life support. (0:36:00) – Coping with Losing a Twin He opens up about the heartbreak of losing Tim, what it meant to lose his “person,” and the impact on his life, sobriety, and ongoing grief. (0:38:00) – Sober Companion Los Angeles: From Grief to Purpose Tommy shares how he turned his pain into purpose by founding Sober Companion LA to help families in crisis, offering interventions, support, and 24/7 recovery coaching nationwide. (0:43:00) – Advice for Siblings Struggling with Guilt and “Could I Have Saved Them?” Tommy speaks directly to listeners who’ve lost a sibling to addiction—offering compassionate, practical advice on releasing guilt, seeking professional help, and finding peace in grief. (0:51:00) – The Night He Almost Relapsed — and Chose Life He reflects on the night of Tim’s death, when he stood outside a bar ready to drink—but made a different choice, asked for help, and recommitted to his sobriety. (0:55:00) – Continuing the Mission and Staying Sober Together Tommy concludes by encouraging siblings to reach out, stay connected, and know they are not alone in grief or in healing. 🎧 Listen to the full episode of “Tommy Loses John To Addiction & Tim To Cancer” — streaming now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by Sober Companion Los Angeles. Connect with Tommy: Instagram: Yelp: Sober Companion Website: Sober Companion NYC: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Brennan Loses Jackson To A Storm Accident
10/01/2025
Brennan Loses Jackson To A Storm Accident
On episode 5 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler welcomes Brennan to share the devastating and unexpected loss of her younger brother, Jackson, during a freak storm in 2019. What begins as a reflection on their sibling relationship through childhood, divorce, and young adulthood turns into a powerful story of trauma, survival, family dynamics, and what it means to rebuild, both physically and emotionally. Brennan takes us back to life growing up in the Mississippi Delta, the evolution of her bond with Jackson, and the unique pain of being the only surviving sibling. When a storm tore through her hometown, uprooting trees and altering the course of her family’s life in an instant, Brennan was thrust into a nightmarish journey of grief, resilience, and reconstruction, literally and emotionally. The episode dives deep into themes of sudden loss, natural disaster trauma, complicated family dynamics, anticipatory grief, and healing through change. Brennan shares how she supported both of her divorced parents in uniquely different ways, helped rebuild the family home, and eventually made a life-changing move across the country that helped her begin healing. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Brennan and Her Brother Jackson Maya welcomes Brennan, who shares stories of growing up six years apart from her brother Jackson and how their sibling dynamic changed over time. (0:03:00) – Childhood, Divorce, and Reconnection Brennan reflects on how her parents’ divorce affected her relationship with Jackson and how their bond began to strengthen as they got older. (0:05:00) – The Day Everything Changed Brennan recounts the tragic storm that took Jackson’s life, the chilling phone call from her father, and the frantic drive through fallen trees and flooded roads to reach her family home. (0:07:00) – A Father’s Desperation and a Devastating Scene She shares the harrowing details of her arrival: her father soaked and shivering, first responders delayed, and the realization that her brother was already gone. (0:09:00) – A Freak Storm with No Warning Brennan explains the storm conditions and how a misreported tornado warning led to five massive oak trees being uprooted one of which landed directly on the home’s front door. (0:11:00) – Shock, Rescue, and Reality Setting In She describes the painful wait, her father's rescue attempts, and the surrealism of those first few hours of grief. (0:13:00) – Storm Preparedness, Tornado Drills, and Coping with Chaos Maya and Brennan reflect on growing up with tornado drills and how this tragedy added a new, personal layer to those experiences. (0:23:00) – Planning a Funeral Through Grief Brennan takes the lead on planning Jackson’s service, navigating her parents' conflicting wishes, and honoring her brother with a celebration at his childhood church. (0:26:00) – A Standing Room Only Memorial The funeral draws a massive crowd every seat filled, and hundreds standing. Brennan reflects on how that overwhelming support was both shocking and comforting. (0:29:00) – Back to Work and Back to the Build Just days later, Brennan returns to work and begins helping her father rebuild the house, an emotional and physical labor of love that spans over two years. (0:33:00) – Grieving Through a Pandemic She shares how grief collided with COVID-19, slowing down the rebuild and affecting her mental health, her parents’ well-being, and their support systems. (0:35:00) – A Fresh Start in Las Vegas Brennan talks about the pivotal phone call from her mom asking her to move across the country. Without hesitation, she says yes. (0:44:00) – Helping Her Mom Through Grief She reflects on moving in with her mom, their evolving relationship, and witnessing how differently each parent handled Jackson’s death. (0:47:00) – Two Parents, Two Grief Journeys Brennan discusses how her dad grieved through action, while her mom grieved through emotion, and how she found herself trying to show up for both—while still navigating her own loss. (0:50:00) – The Only Surviving Sibling As the only surviving sibling, Brennan opens up about feeling lonely in her grief, questioning her place in her parents’ world, and learning to own her voice and her story. (0:56:00) – Advice to the Newly Bereaved Brennan’s parting words are powerful: “Give yourself grace. Don’t bottle it up. If you don’t let it out, it becomes a monster.” She encourages all siblings to reach out, speak up, and find safe people to lean on. Listen to the full episode of “Brennan Loses Jackson To A Storm Accident” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Brennan: Facebook: Tik Tok: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Michael Loses Jimmy To A Homicide
09/17/2025
Michael Loses Jimmy To A Homicide
On episode 4 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler is joined by Michael Tobin, who shares the raw and unfiltered story of losing his older brother, Jimmy, to homicide in 1992. Over 30 years later, Michael reflects on how this traumatic event shaped his life, his family, and his ongoing mission to keep Jimmy’s memory alive. Michael recounts the joys of growing up in a big Irish-Catholic family in the Bronx, the tight-knit neighborhood where breakdancing, graffiti, and hip-hop shaped their youth, and the bond he shared with Jimmy—a wisecracking, creative, loyal soul who was beloved by all who knew him. But in April of 1992, that world was shattered when Jimmy was chased down and killed just 100 yards from their front door. This episode explores not only the devastating loss of a sibling to violence, but also the long-term impact of unresolved cases, complicated grief, faith, family dynamics, and the lifelong journey of honoring someone gone too soon. Michael’s story is one of heartbreak, healing, and finding strength through memory, community, and creative expression. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Michael and Remembering Jimmy Michael shares about growing up in a big family in the Bronx in the 80s, surrounded by hip-hop, graffiti, and a strong sibling bond with Jimmy. (0:03:00) – Jimmy: The Artist, Protector, and Big Brother Jimmy’s love for graffiti, music, and community come to life, along with heartfelt memories of his protectiveness and humor. (0:06:00) – A Brush with Death: Jimmy’s 1990 Car Accident Michael recounts how Jimmy survived a devastating crash at 16, learning to walk again—a trauma that predated his murder. (0:08:00) – April 3, 1992: The Night Everything Changed Jimmy was ambushed just a block from home. Michael describes the events leading to the homicide and its immediate aftermath. (0:14:00) – A Phone Call, A Car Ride, and A Life Shattered Michael shares the harrowing moment he found out about his brother’s death while staying in Long Island. (0:17:00) – Delivering the News to Jimmy’s Girlfriend In one of the most emotional moments of the episode, Michael describes having to tell Jimmy’s girlfriend about his death. (0:18:00) – Wakes, Funeral, and Unimaginable Loss Three days of public grieving culminate in Jimmy’s funeral—a moment that changed Michael’s life forever. (0:22:00) – Reading the Eulogy: A 15-Year-Old’s Defining Moment Michael reflects on writing and reading a letter with his siblings to Jimmy—an act that would shape his voice and purpose for decades. (0:26:00) – The Long Grief Journey: 30 Years of Remembering Michael discusses the evolution of grief, the anger, the love, and the unshakable commitment to never letting Jimmy be forgotten. (0:29:00) – Graffiti Memorials, Tagging, and Street Reminders He shares stories of tribute murals, Taz tags, and how graffiti became a way of keeping Jimmy’s spirit alive in the neighborhood. (0:33:00) – The Case Still Unsolved Michael speaks on the pain of unresolved homicide cases and the faith his mother held onto despite the lack of justice. (0:35:00) – Faith, Anger, and Letting Go He recalls his mother’s unwavering faith and how he eventually turned a corner from hatred to honoring how Jimmy lived. (0:38:00) – Closure Isn’t Real, But Perspective Is Maya and Michael discuss the myth of closure, and why time doesn’t heal—but allows you to carry grief differently. (0:42:00) – Friends, Support, and Found Family Michael expresses gratitude for the friends and chosen family who carried him through the darkest years. (0:44:00) – Coping Without Answers They dive into the reality of unsolved cases, lingering pain, and how the pursuit of justice often looks nothing like TV. (0:49:00) – Advice for Siblings Grieving Homicide Loss Michael offers heartfelt advice for those stuck in anger, seeking justice, or waiting for closure that may never come. (0:51:00) – Family Dynamics, Different Grief Journeys He reflects on how each sibling grieved differently and how his mother’s legacy of “stay together” held the family through decades. Listen to the full episode of “Michael Loses Jimmy To Homicide” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Michael: Facebook: Instagram: Tik Tok: Facebook: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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The Thurgaland’s Lose Kathryn To A Car Accident
09/03/2025
The Thurgaland’s Lose Kathryn To A Car Accident
On episode 3 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler sits down with three surviving siblings Elizabeth, Roger (Avery), and Ryan to share the heartbreaking and inspiring story of losing their sister, Kathryn “Kayleigh” Thurgaland, in a tragic car accident in October 2020. What makes this episode truly unique is hearing the story from three perspectives, each sibling offering a different memory, emotion, and lens through which Kayleigh is remembered. From early childhood memories filled with family bonfires and music, to the unimaginable moment of receiving the call that she had passed, this episode is a portrait of a family that has chosen love, unity, and legacy in the face of profound loss. Kayleigh was a gifted artist, dancer, and musician whose spirit lives on through the Kathryn Lee Thurgaland Foundation, a family-run nonprofit offering grief support to families, scholarships to young artists, and a celebration of life through their annual Love of Life Festival. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Introducing the Thurgaland Siblings Maya welcomes Elizabeth, Roger (Avery), and Ryan to the show. The three surviving siblings share their family dynamic, what it was like growing up with Kayleigh, and their close-knit, creative household full of love, art, and adventure. (0:05:00) – Each Sibling Shares Their Bond with Kayleigh Elizabeth, the eldest, recalls being a “second mom” figure. Roger reflects on their musical childhood and fatherhood overlapping with grief. Ryan speaks about being the baby of the family and Kayleigh’s influence on his love for dance and music. (0:15:00) – The Last Day They Saw Kayleigh Each sibling recounts the day Kayleigh returned home from college. Her final night, the last hug, and the moments leading up to the car accident that took her life. Their vivid, heartbreaking memories capture both the beauty of their bond and the devastation of sudden loss. (0:26:00) – The Accident Elizabeth walks listeners through the frantic hours spent trying to locate Kayleigh after she didn’t return home, how she uncovered clues from snapchat, and the devastating moment the family received the news. (0:44:00) – What Happened to Kayleigh Kayleigh and a friend died in a car crash caused by distracted driving and speeding. She was asleep in the passenger seat. The car crossed a median and was struck by an oncoming vehicle. Both passengers were pronounced dead at the scene. [00:46:00] How the Foundation Began The family shares how community support inspired them to start the KLT Foundation, honoring Kayleigh’s life through grief support, scholarships, and the Love of Life Festival. [00:51:00] Kayleigh’s Art & Words Her artwork and powerful quotes live on—"If any flame could burn forever, it would be our own..."—now used for fundraising and remembrance. [00:53:00] Grieving as a Family Ryan discusses how working together as a family through the foundation is healing, even when it's hard. [00:55:00] Love of Life Festival 2026 Event details for the next Love of Life Festival in Weirsdale, FL—March 7, 2026. Music, art, and remembrance. This episode is sponsored by The Kathryn Leigh Thurgaland Foundation Out of their immense grief, the Thurgalands created the Kathryn Lee Thurgaland Foundation, which serves three powerful missions: Grief Week Support: Helping families during the fragile first days after losing a child. Creative Arts Scholarships: Supporting students pursuing careers in the arts. Love of Life Festival: A free, joy-filled event celebrating life, community, and remembrance. Their motto? “Keep laughing. Keep dancing. Keep singing.” — a phrase pulled from Kayleigh’s own journals. Learn More About The Foundation: Press Kit: The KLT Foundation: KLT Foundation Instagram: KLT Foundation Linkedin: Love Of Life Festival: Connect with Elizabeth: Facebook: Instagram: Connect With Roger Avery: Facebook: Instagram: TikTok: Connect With Ryan: Instagram: TikTok: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Lori Loses Gina To Breast Cancer
08/20/2025
Lori Loses Gina To Breast Cancer
On episode 2 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings Podcast®, host, Maya Roffler welcomes Lori to share the heartfelt journey of losing her sister, Gina, to breast cancer. What begins as a candid reflection on sibling dynamics soon unfolds into an honest, powerful testimony of anticipatory grief, advocacy, and resilience. Lori opens up about growing up as the “quintessential middle child” in a close-knit family, the evolution of her relationship with Gina from sibling rivalry to deep sisterhood, and how their bond strengthened through the challenges of Gina’s cancer diagnosis at age 37. As a nurse, Lori offers a unique lens, balancing her clinical instincts with emotional turmoil as she watched her sister fight a devastating disease. The episode dives deep into themes like anticipatory grief, family caregiving, shifting family roles, the emotional toll of being both a sibling and a medical professional, and the moment Lori truly stepped into the role of Gina’s advocate, making the most difficult decisions no sibling ever wants to face. Ultimately, Lori reflects on how Gina’s legacy shaped the mother, nurse, and person she is today and offers compassionate advice for anyone walking the painful road of sibling loss to cancer. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Meet Lori and Her Sister Gina Maya welcomes Lori, who reflects on her childhood with her older sister Gina, their sibling rivalry, and how they grew closer as adults. (0:03:00) – The Diagnosis That Changed Everything Lori, a nurse, recounts the moment Gina called her about a lump — and how the diagnosis of triple-negative breast cancer at age 37 turned their world upside down. (0:06:00) – Treatment, Hope, and Medical Realities Lori explains Gina’s treatment journey, the challenges of triple-negative breast cancer, and the emotional toll of watching her sister become a patient. (0:13:00) – From Sister to Advocate Lori describes how she transitioned from “just” a nurse and sister to becoming Gina’s full-fledged medical advocate, particularly as treatment options ran out. (0:18:00) – Anticipatory Grief and Bargaining with the Universe She shares her internal struggles — including moments of bargaining and wishing she could trade places — and the power of naming those feelings. (0:25:00) – A Pivotal Night, a Fish Tank, and a Shift Lori recounts the night she lost hope — and how it became the turning point that moved her from fear to fierce protection of Gina’s dignity. (0:29:00) – Final Days, Hard Decisions, and Saying Goodbye An intense and brave retelling of the days leading to Gina’s passing, including making a DNR decision, choosing comfort care, and honoring Gina’s wishes. (0:33:00) – Cremation, Closure, and a Closed Casket Lori shares the emotional moments surrounding Gina’s service and the deeply personal decision to protect her sister’s dignity, even in death. (0:37:00) – Grieving While Working in Healthcare She opens up about returning to work days after the funeral, navigating poor grief support at her job, and the need for better bereavement understanding. (0:41:00) – Time Doesn’t Heal — It Helps You Adjust Lori reflects on how grief evolves — why time doesn’t heal but does allow you to adapt — and how her family honors Gina in small, beautiful ways. (0:44:00) – Keeping Gina’s Memory Alive for Her Children She talks about raising Gina’s daughters with love and intention, helping them understand who their mother was, and showing up as a steady presence. (0:48:00) – Legacy, Compassion, and Becoming a Better Human Lori shares how Gina’s life and death transformed her — making her a better nurse, mom, and human being with deeper empathy and compassion for others. (0:53:00) – Advice for Surviving Siblings and Caregivers She offers powerful advice for those experiencing anticipatory grief or recent loss: “Show yourself grace. Do what’s best for you in the moment.” Listen to the full episode of “Lori Loses Gina To Breast Cancer” now on all major platforms. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Lori: Facebook: Tik Tok: Instagram: Email: forevergina@myyahoo.com Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Amanda Loses Bill to Hyperthermia
08/06/2025
Amanda Loses Bill to Hyperthermia
On episode 1 of Season 8 of The Surviving Siblings® Podcast, host, Maya Roffler sits down with Amanda, who shares the heartbreaking story of losing her older brother, Bill, to hyperthermia in the Arizona desert. Amanda walks us through the unique sibling dynamic they shared, the evolution of their relationship as adults, and the tragic events that unfolded in the summer of 2013. From the moment Amanda lost her housing at 19 and moved across the country into Bill’s home, to the tight-knit bond they formed in the years that followed, Amanda paints a vivid picture of how integral her brother was to her journey. The story then takes a devastating turn as she recounts the day she learned Bill went missing — and the unimaginable moments that followed. Amanda also opens up about the difficult grief path she’s navigated since, including the mental, emotional, and spiritual toll of losing someone in such a preventable way. She shares how her healing journey eventually led to founding the nonprofit Bottles for Bill, which provides bottled water and education to prevent heat-related deaths — a legacy of purpose built from heartbreak. This episode is a raw, real, and unforgettable conversation about loss, sibling connection, resilience, and turning grief into action. In This Episode: (0:00:00) – Introducing Amanda and Her Brother Bill Maya welcomes Amanda, who begins to share her journey as a surviving sibling and her bond with her older brother Bill, a world-traveling Army veteran. (0:01:00) – Growing Up With a Nine-Year Age Gap Amanda reflects on her childhood in a small Michigan town, the long-distance sibling relationship she had with Bill, and how they reconnected when she became a teenager. (0:03:00) – Rebuilding Their Bond in Young Adulthood Amanda explains how a family divorce and new technology helped bring her and Bill closer as she navigated college and adult life. (0:05:00) – The Cross-Country Move That Changed Everything Amanda shares how Bill invited her and her now-husband to Arizona after she became suddenly homeless — and how this gesture solidified their relationship and support for each other. (0:10:00) – Tragedy, Joy, and Complicated Grief Amanda recounts the loss of a beloved figure in her life, her brother’s newborn son, and how multiple layers of grief interwove during this season of transition and growth. (0:16:00) – A Family Trip and a Final Hug Amanda shares precious memories from a family trip to Michigan taken just one week before Bill’s death — and the last time she ever saw her brother alive. (0:18:00) – The Day Bill Went Missing Amanda describes the moment she received the call that something was wrong, the shock that followed, and the surreal experience of traveling to the desert in search of answers. (0:25:00) – The Moment Everything Changed Amanda shares the exact moment her family was told Bill was gone — and the primal scream that will forever live in her memory. (0:30:00) – What Happened to Bill? Amanda walks through the investigation, autopsy, and heartbreaking discovery that her brother had died from hyperthermia — extreme heat exposure — after becoming disoriented in the desert. (0:35:00) – The Unimaginable Grief of a Preventable Loss Amanda opens up about the psychological torment of losing someone to something so preventable — and how it sent her spiraling into questions and “what ifs.” (0:44:00) – The Role of Therapy and Asking for Help Amanda shares how grief therapy helped her pause her obsessive search for answers and gave her permission to simply feel her pain and begin healing. (0:51:00) – Grieving While in Partnership Amanda discusses what it was like grieving alongside her husband, who also knew and loved Bill, and how deep communication became the foundation for getting through the hardest season of their marriage. (0:56:00) – Honoring Bill’s Legacy with Purpose Amanda introduces her nonprofit Bottles for Bill and how a small act of asking for $5 water donations turned into a six-year mission that’s now donated over 300,000 bottles of water and saved lives. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings® Connect with Amanda: Facebook: Instagram: Facebook: Instagram: Tik Tok: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Jessica Loses Jen To Addiction
06/25/2025
Jessica Loses Jen To Addiction
In this heartfelt episode of The Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Jessica Meyer, a bereaved sibling who lost her younger sister, Jen, to fentanyl addiction in 2021. Jessica opens up about the deep bond they shared growing up in a tight-knit Mexican-Jewish family and how addiction slowly dismantled their lives. Jen was so much more than her addiction—an empathetic, talented athlete and the life of every room she entered. Jessica walks us through Jen’s undiagnosed Tourette’s and ADHD, how she began self-medicating with Ambien as a teenager, and how this evolved into decades of addiction, multiple rehabs, and painful relapses. Jen later found purpose helping others through recovery—but her battle with addiction continued in secret. Jessica shares the heartbreaking story of Jen’s final days, her passing just 48 hours after her daughter left for college, and the raw aftermath of losing her lifelong best friend. She also reveals the shocking discovery of a drug trafficking ring tied to Jen’s death, her fight for justice, and the family’s grief journey that followed. This powerful episode is an unflinching look at sibling loss through addiction and the devastating reality of fentanyl-related deaths. Jessica’s vulnerability, courage, and passion to honor Jen’s legacy through her jewelry brand, Bullet Girl, is a tribute to both pain and purpose. In This Episode: (00:01:00) – Jessica & Jen's Bond Jessica shares their close-knit childhood, imaginative games, and growing up inseparable in a loving family. (00:03:00) – Early Signs: Tourette's, ADHD & Ambien Use Jen’s tics and impulsivity went undiagnosed for years. Ambien use in her teens became the beginning of her addiction journey. (00:08:00) – The Beginnings of Addiction Jessica reflects on Jen’s coping mechanisms, her early experimentation, and how recreational use escalated. (00:12:00) – College, Trauma, and First Rehab Jen’s assault trauma, college struggles, and introduction to harder drugs like crystal meth and cocaine are revealed. (00:19:00) – Marriage, Motherhood, and Addiction’s Grip Despite marrying and becoming a mom, Jen’s addiction deepened—leading to lost custody and deteriorating health. (00:24:00) – Boundaries, Guilt, and Tough Love Jessica painfully discusses the limits she had to set and the guilt of choosing distance the week before Jen passed. (00:28:00) – Jen’s Role Helping Others in Recovery Jen found strength in working at a rehab center—offering guidance to others, even as she privately relapsed. (00:33:00) – The Day Jen Passed Jessica walks us through the traumatic discovery of Jen’s body, the heartbreaking final hug, and the unanswered questions. (00:41:00) – Toxicology, Fentanyl, and Black Tar Heroin Jessica shares her detective work uncovering her sister’s fentanyl use, her dealer’s identity, and how evidence led nowhere. (00:49:00) – Justice Denied: The Aftermath Despite a paper trail and drug dealer identification, no legal justice has been served for Jen’s death—fueling the family’s heartbreak. (00:56:00) – Shame, Stigma, and Speaking Out Jessica talks about the stigma of fentanyl deaths, public silence, and the pain of people not seeing Jen beyond her addiction. (01:01:00) – Bullet Girl Jewelry & The Beautiful Struggle Jessica shares the story behind her jewelry line, the letter Jen wrote her, and the upcoming tribute collection called The Beautiful Struggle. (01:07:00) – Advice for Grieving Siblings Jessica urges listeners to give themselves grace, avoid shame, and stay grounded in love—not fear—through the grief journey This episode is sponsored by Bullet Girl Jewelry Connect with Jessica: Email: Instagram: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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LeeAnn Loses Michael To Addiction
06/11/2025
LeeAnn Loses Michael To Addiction
In this deeply honest and heartfelt episode of The Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler sits down with LeAnn Sullivan, a bereaved sister who lost her brother Michael to addiction in 2016. LeAnn shares her powerful story of love, loss, resilience, and healing after years of navigating a complicated family dynamic, her brother’s addiction, and her own journey through grief. Growing up with divorced parents and facing early separation from Michael, LeAnn always saw herself as his protector. Despite their time apart, they reconnected as young adults, building a bond that helped them raise their respective children together and create a deeply rooted sibling relationship. When Michael passed away unexpectedly, LeAnn’s world crumbled. But in the years since, she has turned her pain into purpose—becoming an advocate for families affected by addiction and a board member of the Shevlin Family Foundation. This episode explores the complexity of sibling grief after addiction, the layers of family trauma, and the power of transforming pain into community and service. LeAnn’s story is one of loss, but also of light—a testament to what it means to survive, heal, and honor a sibling’s legacy. In This Episode: (00:01:00) – LeAnn’s Early Life & Separation from Michael (00:03:00) – Reconnecting as Adults & Becoming a Team (00:08:00) – The Call That Changed Everything (00:10:00) – The Physical Pain of Loss & Funeral Experience (00:14:00) – Returning to Work Amidst Grief (00:17:00) – Helping Her Son Through Grief & Recovery (00:21:00) – Family Strain and the Power of Support (00:24:00) – Michael’s Addiction, Relapse & Fentanyl Crisis (00:27:00) – The Stigma of Addiction and Sharing the Truth (00:29:00) – A Turning Point: Losing Her Job & Finding Healing (00:31:00) – Creating Bowl for Hope & Meeting Christine This episode is sponsored by The Shevlin Family Foundation If you or someone you love is struggling with addiction help is available. Please reach out to a professional or call your local crisis line. You are never alone More About The Shevlin Family Foundation: Website: Facebook: Instagram: Linkedin: Connect with LeeAnn: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Jen Loses Teddy To Suicide
05/28/2025
Jen Loses Teddy To Suicide
In this raw and profoundly moving episode of The Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler sits down with Jen, a bereaved sibling who lost her brother Teddy to suicide in 2017. Jen and Teddy shared an incredibly close bond, growing up as part of a large Sicilian family just outside of Boston. But their story begins even earlier—Teddy was a micro-preemie twin who survived against all odds, unknowingly carrying deep grief for his twin, Joseph, who died shortly after birth. Jen opens up about the fierce sibling connection they shared, their upbringing in a culture that didn’t talk about emotions, and the invisible scars Teddy carried after a childhood marked by severe bullying, trauma, and being misunderstood. Despite his vibrant, goofy, and deeply caring personality, Teddy struggled silently with mental health throughout his life. This episode explores the reality of surviving sibling suicide, the hidden pain many carry, and the complex journey of grief, guilt, and healing. Jen shares how she only began to process her loss years later during the pandemic and how therapy has helped her reframe her survivor’s guilt and begin to find peace. She also reflects on the final moments, the call that changed everything, and the weight of not getting to say goodbye. If you’ve ever felt the heartbreak of suicide loss, struggled with survivor’s guilt, or longed for healing in a family that doesn’t talk about grief—Jen’s story will show you that you are not alone, and your voice matters. In This Episode: (00:01:09) – Growing Up Sicilian Jen describes her “free-range childhood” and the powerful, chaotic closeness of growing up in a big Sicilian family, where cousins felt like siblings. (00:02:31) – Teddy’s Early Arrival & Twin Loss Teddy was born four months premature in 1975. His twin, Joseph, passed away shortly after birth—a fact Jen discovered years later on her own. (00:06:00) – Protector & Big Sister From defending Teddy against bullies to enduring the silence of their home life, Jen shares what it meant to be the older sister in a family that didn’t talk about pain. (00:12:00) – School, Stereotypes & Sibling Comparisons Jen reflects on how academic pressure, comparison, and cultural expectations shaped both her and Teddy in very different ways. (00:15:22) – Therapy & Rewriting the Narrative A family photo once filled with shame becomes a moment of healing thanks to therapy—Jen discusses the power of reframing grief and guilt. (00:19:00) – Discovering Teddy’s Twinhood Jen recalls the moment she discovered Teddy was a surviving twin and the emotional weight of finding a note he once wrote to God, asking if his brother was safe in heaven. (00:22:00) – 2017: The Year Everything Changed After losing his beloved grandmother and a close friend, Teddy's grief deepened. Jen shares how she never saw the signs of his declining mental health. (00:26:00) – A Life of Trauma and Suppression From childhood bullying to a near-institutionalization as a teen, Jen uncovers the deep traumas Teddy endured—and how their family culture of silence kept him from healing. (00:30:00) – Teddy’s First Suicide Attempt In 2003, Teddy survived a suicide attempt on Boston’s Tobin Bridge. Jen recounts the hospital call that changed everything—and how the stigma around mental health silenced the conversation for years. (00:32:00) – Saying Goodbye Was Not Easy Jen discusses the complicated decisions her family made after Teddy’s death, the tension surrounding his service, and the 400 people who came to say goodbye. (00:35:00) – The Call That Changed Everything Jen shares the moment she learned of Teddy’s death—and how her family’s avoidance of grief left her in prolonged shock for nearly three years. (00:42:00) – Grief Bubble & Delayed Healing Without the space to grieve immediately, Jen’s own grief journey was stunted. She talks about what it means to be “strong for the family” and the emotional cost of silence. (00:44:00) – The Pandemic Awakening It wasn’t until the COVID-19 pandemic that Jen was forced to sit with her thoughts—and finally begin to unpack her trauma and start to heal. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. If you or someone you love is struggling with mental health or suicidal thoughts, help is available. Please reach out to a mental health professional or call your local crisis line. You are never alone. Connect with Jen: Facebook: Instagram: Website: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Cryssy Loses Danielle To Leukemia
05/14/2025
Cryssy Loses Danielle To Leukemia
In this heartfelt episode of the Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Cryssy, a bereaved sibling who lost her younger sister, Danielle, to acute myeloid leukemia in 2012. As the oldest sibling, Cryssy took on the role of protector, caregiver, and advocate—navigating the heartbreak of watching her sister battle a devastating illness. Cryssy shares her deeply personal journey of anticipatory grief, the pain of losing Danielle at just 21 years old, and the complex emotions of grieving while trying to stay strong for her family. She opens up about the regret of not getting to say goodbye the way she wanted, the physical toll grief took on her body, and the creative, meaningful ways she keeps Danielle’s memory alive every day. This episode is a powerful conversation about sibling loss, anticipatory grief, and finding purpose after tragedy. Cryssy also shares how honoring her sister through traditions, a beloved stuffed animal, and small daily acts has helped her heal—and how grief can manifest physically in ways we might never expect. If you’ve ever felt the weight of grieving a sibling while being the “strong one” for others, Cryssy’s story will remind you that love endures, even through the pain. In This Episode: (00:01:00) – Danielle: A Birthday Gift Sister Cryssy shares how Danielle was born just two days before her own birthday, how they celebrated together, and how their sibling bond was filled with love, chaos, and laughter. (00:04:00) – Big Sister, Protector, Mama Bear Growing up as the oldest, Cryssy stepped into a protective role, helping raise Danielle and their brother, shielding them, and taking on family responsibilities from a young age. (00:05:00) – The Call That Changed Everything Cryssy recounts the moment she learned Danielle was being rushed to the hospital after a bloody nose turned into a leukemia diagnosis—and how she instantly began grieving. (00:08:00) – Facing Acute Myeloid Leukemia Cryssy explains Danielle’s diagnosis, the aggressive treatment process, and how she tried to stay hopeful on the outside while preparing herself internally for the worst. (00:11:00) – Holidays in the Hospital Danielle asked Cryssy to decorate her hospital room for Halloween and Christmas—keeping their family traditions alive despite spending their favorite holidays in a hospital room. (00:14:00) – The Final Christmas Together Cryssy reflects on their last Christmas, staying up all night talking, exchanging meaningful gifts, and creating treasured memories in what would be Danielle’s final holiday. (00:19:00) – Saying Goodbye Without Words Cryssy shares the experience of Danielle’s “surge” before passing, the bittersweet final days, and the deep regret of not being able to say goodbye the way she had hoped. (00:24:00) – Preparing Danielle’s Goodbye Honoring her sister’s love of style, Cryssy lovingly prepared Danielle for her viewing—painting her nails, doing her hair, dressing her in jewelry, and ensuring she looked radiant. (00:31:00) – A Dream Visit From Danielle Months after Danielle’s passing, Cryssy had a vivid dream of Danielle smiling and telling her, “It’s okay to be okay”—a powerful, healing moment that brought her comfort. (00:37:00) – Grief’s Physical Impact Cryssy opens up about how her grief manifested in physical illness, leading to hospitalization, sepsis, and a near-death experience that she believes Danielle helped her survive. (00:48:00) – Finding Purpose in Grief Cryssy reflects on how grief has shaped her purpose, giving her strength to help others and reminding her that grief is love in a different form. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Cryssy: Tik Tok: Email: Instagram: Facebook: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Stephanie Loses Quinton To A Car Accident
04/30/2025
Stephanie Loses Quinton To A Car Accident
Maya is joined by Stephanie Murphy, who bravely shares the heartbreaking story of losing her younger brother, Quinton, to a tragic car accident in 2001 when he was just 18 years old. Stephanie opens up about their sibling bond, the fight that led to their last conversation, and the devastating night she learned her brother was gone. She shares how grief collided with unexpected motherhood, her battle with anxiety and alcohol, and how she found strength to heal—leading to nine years of sobriety and honoring Quinton's memory every step of the way. In This Episode: (00:01:00) – Sibling Dynamics: From Rivalry to Best Friends Stephanie reflects on growing up as the oldest sibling, her playful (and sometimes bossy) relationship with Quinton, and how their bond deepened during their high school years. (00:04:00) – An Ambitious Young Man with Big Dreams She shares how Quinton's drive and charisma made him stand out—working multiple jobs, managing at Chick-fil-A, buying his dream car, and planning for a future in business. (00:07:00) – The Fight That Changed Everything Stephanie recounts the emotional last conversation she had with Quinton after a disagreement over her relationship—and how that moment became their final goodbye. (00:11:00) – Missing His Graduation & Growing Distance Stephanie talks about missing Quinton's graduation due to work, the lingering family tensions, and sending a heartfelt letter in hopes of reconciling. (00:15:00) – “I Just Want to Cry…” The Night Before She describes the overwhelming emotions and strange premonition she felt the night before Quinton's accident—a deep knowing that something was wrong. (00:18:00) – The Knock at 4 AM: News No One Ever Wants Stephanie relives the devastating moment her mother arrived at her door to tell her that Quinton had died in a car accident—and how her world shattered in an instant. (00:23:00) – Finding the Unopened Letter While grieving at her parents’ house, Stephanie finds the card and letter she had sent Quinton—still sealed. She opens it at his funeral, turning it into a final tribute. (00:26:00) – What Happened That Night: The Truth About the Accident Stephanie shares what Quinton’s friend—who survived the crash—revealed about the events leading up to the accident, including alcohol, missed exits, and heartbreaking what-ifs. (00:33:00) – Grieving While Pregnant & The Anxiety That Followed Stephanie opens up about navigating grief while expecting her first child, the overwhelming anxiety that took hold, and how she struggled to find normalcy after loss. (00:38:00) – Turning to Alcohol: Numbing the Pain She discusses how grief and family history led her down a path of alcohol dependence—and how it became a coping mechanism for years. (00:40:00) – The Day Everything Changed: Choosing Sobriety On the anniversary of Quinton’s death in 2015, Stephanie made a life-altering decision. She shares what led to her nine years (and counting) of sobriety. (00:49:00) – Learning to Live Without Fear Stephanie reflects on how grief made her fear every phone call, every tragedy, and how she’s worked to regain peace—especially as a mother. (00:57:00) – Signs, Dreams & Spiritual Connection From vivid dreams to her son being born on Quentin’s birthday, Stephanie shares the powerful ways her brother continues to show up in her life. (01:03:00) – Acceptance, Growth & Honoring Quentin Stephanie discusses how she’s learned to live with grief, why healing doesn’t mean forgetting, and how she continues to make her brother proud. (01:08:00) – Advice for Surviving Siblings Stephanie offers heartfelt wisdom for those navigating sibling loss—reminding us that while grief never fully leaves, we can choose growth, joy, and purpose. This episode was sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. Connect with Stephanie: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Parul Loses Manu To Oral Cancer
04/16/2025
Parul Loses Manu To Oral Cancer
Maya is joined by Dr. Parul Dua Makkar—dentist, grief coach, speaker, and author—who shares the heartbreaking journey of losing her only sibling, Manu, to oral cancer at just 34 years old. Parul opens up about the moment she knew something wasn’t right, the delays in diagnosis, what it was like navigating end-of-life care during the height of COVID-19, and how her grief transformed into a powerful mission. She also shares the legacy Manu left behind—his book Life Interrupted, a powerful collection of essays he wrote during his final months, which Parul helped complete and publish after his passing. In This Episode: (00:01:00) – Sibling Bond, Eight Years Apart Parul shares what it was like being a big sister to Manu—changing his diapers, watching him grow up, and how their love for dentistry helped them stay connected despite distance. (00:04:00) – Global Nomads & Deep Connections Raised across continents, Parul and Manu lived in different countries for most of their lives, but their bond stayed strong through regular visits, daily calls, and shared professional passions. (00:08:00) – “This Might Be Cancer…” Parul recalls the moment she saw the lesion in her brother’s mouth. (00:10:00) – The First Surgery & Fighting Back Manu underwent an eight-hour surgery to remove half his tongue, and despite it all, came back stronger—treating patients, traveling, buying a dog (named Maya), and embracing life with a new sense of urgency. (00:14:00) – COVID, Cancer & Compassion Release When the cancer returned in 2020, Parul had to fight to cross the U.S.-Canada border during COVID lockdowns. She shares the emotional story of writing her father a letter, asking for permission to say goodbye. (00:20:00) – “You Can Let Go…” On a video call, Parul tells her brother it’s okay to stop fighting. He passes away just hours later. She arrives in Canada to plan his funeral—grieving, and still under COVID restrictions. (00:24:00) – Loss Upon Loss Parul shares how, just three years later, she lost her father unexpectedly to cardiac arrest—just after Thanksgiving. She reflects on how it felt like her dad died of a broken heart. (00:30:00) – Oral Cancer Awareness & Early Detection As a dentist, Parul explains why oral cancer is often caught too late, how misdiagnosis happens, and what signs everyone should look for. She encourages early biopsies and routine checkups. (00:34:00) – Turning Grief into Purpose After Manu’s passing, Parul completed and published his book, Life Interrupted, which he had begun writing during treatment. She shares how publishing his words brought her healing and closure. This episode was sponsored by Duagoodjob. Connect with Parul: Facebook: Website: LinkedIn: Instagram: Youtube: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Kayla Loses Ashley To Choking
04/02/2025
Kayla Loses Ashley To Choking
In this deeply emotional episode of The Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Kayla, a bereaved sibling who lost her baby sister, Ashley, in a tragic and unexpected medical event in 2006. At just eleven years old, Kayla’s world changed forever when her one-and-a-half-year-old sister suddenly stopped breathing—an event that would later be revealed as a preventable tragedy. Kayla opens up about the deep bond she shared with Ashley, the impact of her sister’s passing on their entire family, and how grief shaped her childhood, teenage years, and adulthood. She shares the devastating realization that Ashley’s death was caused by a misdiagnosed medical condition and how the hospital’s oversight led to a prolonged struggle for answers and justice. This episode explores the complexities of grieving at a young age, how Kayla’s family navigated immense loss, and the lifelong journey of healing. Kayla also discusses the anxiety and trauma that followed, the lasting effects of sibling loss, and how she has found strength in sharing her story for the first time. If you’ve ever experienced loss at a young age or struggled to process grief over the years, Kayla’s story will remind you that healing is possible, and you are not alone. In This Episode: (00:01:09) – The Role of a Big Sister Kayla reflects on growing up as the oldest sibling and the deep love she had for her younger sisters, Mia and Ashley. (00:02:41) – When Ashley Got Sick Kayla recalls the months leading up to Ashley’s passing, the concerning symptoms, and the repeated hospital visits where doctors misdiagnosed her condition. (00:06:20) – The Day That Changed Everything Kayla describes the morning she learned about Ashley’s passing and the shock of hearing the news from her father and stepmother. (00:12:00) – Attending School the Next Day Despite the tragedy, Kayla insisted on going to school, determined to maintain her perfect attendance and a sense of normalcy in the chaos of grief. (00:15:22) – Ashley’s Funeral Kayla shares the surreal experience of attending her sister’s funeral, seeing Ashley one last time, and the heartbreaking traditions her family developed to honor her memory. (00:18:00) – The Truth Behind Ashley’s Passing Weeks later, the autopsy revealed that Ashley had been choking on a peanut for months—something doctors had missed in her chest x-ray. (00:22:30) – The Aftermath: Lawsuits & Family Divides Kayla details how the misdiagnosis led to legal action against the hospital, the ripple effects it had on her family, and how relationships were fractured as blame and guilt took over. (00:35:00) – The Long-Term Impact of Grief Kayla discusses how losing Ashley at such a young age led to severe anxiety, control issues, and the fear of losing loved ones, as well as how therapy and medication have helped her manage these struggles. (00:47:00) – Healing & Moving Forward Years later, Kayla’s family has slowly started to mend. She shares how her father overcame addiction, her stepmother found ways to honor Ashley, and how she has learned to navigate life after loss. (00:56:00) – Advice for Young Bereaved Siblings Kayla reflects on what she would tell her younger self and encourages others to allow themselves to grieve, seek support, and embrace the healing process. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Kayla: Facebook: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Elliet Loses Dylan To A 4-Wheeling Accident
03/19/2025
Elliet Loses Dylan To A 4-Wheeling Accident
In this heartfelt episode of the Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Elliet, a bereaved sibling who lost their younger brother, Dylan, in a tragic four-wheeling accident in 2003. At just eight years old, Elliet’s world was turned upside down when their best friend and only sibling was suddenly gone. Elliet shares their deeply personal journey of navigating grief as a child, how their parents' loss impacted the entire family dynamic, and the emotional weight of growing up as a surviving sibling. They open up about the lasting effects of guilt, the struggle of answering the dreaded "Do you have any siblings?" question, and how they’ve finally found peace and healing—20+ years later. This episode is a powerful conversation about sibling loss, the lifelong journey of grief, and the importance of self-discovery, therapy, and community support. Elliet also shares their experience of coming out as transgender and how it intersected with their grief journey, adding another layer of resilience to their incredible story. If you’ve ever felt like you had to carry the weight of grief alone, Elliet’s story will remind you that you’re not alone. In This Episode: (00:01:09) – Dylan: A Best Friend & Sidekick Elliet reflects on their childhood, growing up extremely close with Dylan, and the unique bond they shared as only siblings. (00:02:31) – The Day That Changed Everything Elliet recounts the last time they saw Dylan before the tragic accident and the gut feeling they couldn’t shake. (00:12:30) – The Moment of Realization Elliet describes the instant their world shattered and how they found out their brother was gone. (00:16:10) – Grieving as a Child Navigating grief at eight years old, dealing with unanswered questions, and feeling the weight of loss in an unexplainable way. (00:32:00) – Becoming the "Perfect" Child Elliet shares how they tried to make life easier for their parents, suppressing their own grief to avoid adding to their pain. (00:42:39) – Finding Therapy & Self-Discovery After years of struggling, Elliet opens up about how therapy, personal growth, and embracing their identity have led them toward healing. (00:50:54) – The 20-Year Milestone & Coming Out Elliet shares how the 20-year anniversary of Dylan’s passing coincided with their decision to come out as transgender, and how it deeply affected their relationship with family. (01:01:06) – The Truth About Grief Why grief never disappears—but instead, we grow around it. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Elliet: Tik Tok: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Jessica Loses Aaron To Drowning
03/05/2025
Jessica Loses Aaron To Drowning
In this deeply emotional episode of the Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Jessica Kueck, a bereaved sibling who courageously shares the heartbreaking story of losing her younger brother, Aaron, at just three years old in a tragic drowning accident. Jessica was only 11 when her world was turned upside down, and she reflects on how this loss shaped her childhood, mental health, and journey into adulthood. Jessica opens up about the intense grief her family endured, particularly the profound impact it had on her mother and father. She shares how growing up in a home marked by sorrow and trauma affected her perspective on life, anxiety, and relationships. Now a mother herself, Jessica talks about how she navigates parenting while consciously working to break the cycle of generational trauma and honor Aaron’s memory in a way that fosters healing and growth. In This Episode: (0:01:18) - Growing Up as the Oldest Sibling Jessica describes her family dynamic, being the oldest of three siblings, and the deep love and admiration her family had for Aaron, their miracle baby. (0:02:13) - A Tragic Day in Arizona Jessica recalls the road trip with her mother, siblings, and family friends that led to the devastating moment when Aaron drowned at their condo’s community pool. (0:06:22) - The Immediate Aftermath Jessica shares the harrowing moments of calling her father, witnessing the chaos at the pool, and the tragic realization at the hospital that Aaron was gone. (0:15:38) - The Funeral and Shiva Jessica reflects on the Jewish traditions of mourning, including Shiva, and how the week of support gave temporary solace to her grieving mother. (0:21:50) - Anxiety and Hypervigilance After Loss Jessica discusses how losing Aaron as a child shaped her anxiety, causing her to catastrophize everyday situations and always anticipate the worst. (0:40:12) - Motherhood and Breaking the Cycle Jessica shares how becoming a mother forced her to confront her childhood trauma, and how she actively works to ensure her daughter doesn’t inherit the same fears and anxieties. (0:46:21) - Finding Healing and Hope Jessica talks about her journey with therapy, medication, and mindfulness practices that have helped her manage her anxiety and live a more present and peaceful life. (1:02:00) - Advice for Those Who Lost a Sibling Young Jessica offers heartfelt advice for siblings who lost their brother or sister as children, discussing how to navigate grief, honor their sibling, and create a life that fosters healing. This episode is a poignant reminder that grief is a lifelong journey, but healing and transformation are possible. Jessica’s story is one of strength, awareness, and breaking cycles to build a healthier future for herself and her family. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. Connect with Jessica: Facebook: Linkedin: Email: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Michelle Loses Pat To A Plane Crash
02/19/2025
Michelle Loses Pat To A Plane Crash
In this deeply moving episode of the Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Michelle Tobin, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, therapist, and author, who shares her emotional journey of losing her brother Patrick in a devastating plane crash. Michelle reflects on the lasting impact of this loss, how it shaped her career in mental health, and the unexpected ways grief has woven itself into her life’s work. She opens up about trauma, healing, and the importance of finding outlets for grief, including writing, physical movement, and faith. Michelle’s story is one of resilience, personal transformation, and hope as she discusses how she carried her brother’s memory with her for 50 years, culminating in the release of her novel, Home for the Bewildered. This powerful episode offers insight and comfort for anyone navigating sibling loss and seeking ways to move forward while keeping their loved ones close. In This Episode: (0:01:18) - Growing Up in a Large Family Michelle paints a picture of her family dynamics, growing up as one of twelve children, and the deep admiration she had for her older brother Patrick. (0:04:36) - The Night of the Tragedy Michelle recounts the eerie feeling she and her sister had the night before Thanksgiving, followed by the heartbreaking moment they learned of Patrick’s passing. (0:06:28) - Processing Grief as a Teenager Michelle reflects on the immediate aftermath of Patrick’s passing, the difficulties of not having closure due to a closed casket, and how grief was handled in her family during the 1970s. (0:14:53) - The Five-Year Mark and a Divine Intervention Michelle shares the moment she experienced a divine intervention, a turning point in her healing journey, and how she found solace through swimming and faith. (0:21:12) - The Importance of Physical Outlets for Grief Maya and Michelle discuss how physical activity, whether it be swimming, running, or walking, can serve as a powerful release for trauma and emotional pain. (0:27:17) - Giving Yourself Grace in the Grieving Process Michelle emphasizes the importance of allowing yourself to grieve in your own way, shutting out societal pressures, and leaning into people who offer true support. (0:46:21) - Writing Home for the Bewildered 50 Years Later Michelle discusses how her novel was inspired by her brother’s death and the themes of grief, trauma, and healing embedded in her writing. She also explains the significance of setting the novel in 1974, the year Patrick passed away. (0:50:56) - Where to Find Michelle’s Book Michelle shares how listeners can purchase Home for the Bewildered directly from Vine Leaves Press and connect with her through her website and social media. This episode is a heartfelt exploration of loss, resilience, and finding light after tragedy. Michelle’s story is a testament to the power of healing, self-discovery, and embracing hope, no matter how many years have passed. This episode is sponsored by Home for the Bewildered written by Michelle Tobin. Connect with Michelle: Website: Instagram: Tik Tok: @michelletobin7 Facebook: Purchase Her Book Here: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Claire Loses Rob to Assault
12/18/2024
Claire Loses Rob to Assault
Claire Thompson’s journey is one of resilience, loss, and healing after the devastating loss of her brother Rob. From their tight-knit sibling bond growing up in Scotland to the tragedy that would redefine Claire’s life, this episode explores the profound grief and transformation that comes with sibling loss. Rob, a charismatic and creative soul with a love for video editing, music, and fine whiskey, was tragically taken in 2014 due to an unprovoked assault in Glasgow, Scotland. Claire shares the heart-wrenching details of that day, the waiting period that followed, and the challenging processes that came after. She delves into the immense toll of those three days in the hospital, leading to the painful decision to say goodbye to Rob. Claire’s story is not only about loss but also about survival and finding purpose. A psychologist in training, Claire discusses how Rob’s death shaped her life and led her to focus her career on sibling loss and bereavement. Through sled dog racing in Alaska, connecting with nature, and deep empathy, Claire found ways to heal and honor her brother’s legacy. Now completing her doctorate, she is conducting a groundbreaking study on young adult sibling loss to advocate for greater awareness and support for surviving siblings. In this episode: (00:00:55) – Introduction to Claire’s Background and Family Dynamics (00:10:09) – The Day of Rob’s Assault and the Aftermath (00:18:34) – Navigating Hospital Decisions and Legal Processes (00:27:00) – Finding Strength Through Nature and Connection (00:36:42) – The Healing Power of Empathy and Advocacy (00:46:39) – Claire’s Current Work and Doctoral Research on Sibling Loss Claire’s story is a powerful testament to the enduring bonds of sibling love and the transformative power of channeling grief into purpose. Connect with Claire: Email: Facebook: This Episode is Sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram:Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Heather Loses Casey To Gun Violence
12/11/2024
Heather Loses Casey To Gun Violence
In this emotional episode of the Surviving Siblings podcast, host Maya Roffler welcomes Heather, who shares the devastating story of losing her brother Casey to gun violence. Heather takes listeners on a journey through their close sibling bond, the tragic circumstances of Casey's death, and the lifelong impact of his loss. She opens up about navigating grief, seeking answers, and finding healing over the 30 years since Casey’s passing. Heather’s story is one of heartbreak, resilience, and hope, as she reflects on her journey to honor Casey’s memory and find strength amid unanswered questions. In This Episode: (0:00:10) - Introducing Heather and Casey's Story Maya introduces Heather, who shares her journey as a surviving sibling and tells the story of her brother Casey, whom she lost to gun violence at 18 years old. (0:01:33) - Heather’s Family Dynamics Heather reflects on her family growing up, her father’s military background, and her close sibling bond with Casey, the middle child in their family of three siblings. (0:02:54) - Casey’s Protective Nature Heather recalls her relationship with Casey, his protective personality, and the deep connection they shared as siblings. (0:06:18) - Casey’s Teen Years and Struggles Heather shares how family challenges, including her father’s alcoholism, influenced Casey’s teenage years, leading him to the wrong crowd and struggles with substance use. (0:12:14) - The Night of the Tragedy Heather recounts the heartbreaking night Casey was shot and how he was brought home alive by his friends, leading to a chaotic and tragic turn of events. (0:18:37) - The Aftermath at the Hospital Heather describes the shocking moments in the hospital, Casey’s brief responsiveness, and the devastating decision to donate his organs. (1:03:00) - Heather’s Transformational Dream Heather describes a vivid dream of Casey shortly after his death, which brought her comfort and a sense of peace, affirming his continued presence in her life. This episode is a testament to the strength it takes to survive the loss of a sibling, especially under tragic circumstances. Heather’s story is both heart-wrenching and inspiring, offering hope and solidarity to those on a similar journey. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Heather: TikTok: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Diana Loses Tyler To Asthma
11/27/2024
Diana Loses Tyler To Asthma
In this heartfelt episode, host Maya Roffler speaks with Diana Hunter, who opens up about the loss of her brother Tyler. Diana shares her story of growing up with her three younger brothers, the unique sibling bond she shared with Tyler, and the challenges he faced with asthma and addiction. Diana reflects on her family's complicated dynamics, her role as a "second mom" to her younger siblings, and how Tyler’s passing deeply impacted her and her family. Throughout this conversation, Diana and Maya connect on the experience of being the eldest sibling, processing sudden loss, and finding light amidst grief. In this episode: (0:00:45) - Diana’s Background and Family Dynamics (0:02:00) - Tyler’s Health Challenges and Asthma Diagnosis (0:07:28) - Navigating Family Tensions (0:08:57) - Tyler’s Adult Life and Struggles with Addiction (0:21:00) - The Day of Tyler’s Passing (0:26:37) - Family Reconciliation (0:33:18) - Talking to Jack About Tyler’s Passing (0:46:34) - Processing Complicated Grief Connect with Diana: TikTok: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Janine's Sister Big Ang battles Cancer
11/13/2024
Janine's Sister Big Ang battles Cancer
In this heartfelt and deeply moving episode of The Surviving Siblings Podcast, host Maya Roffler sits down with Janine DeTore, the youngest of seven siblings, to share an intimate look into her life, her incredible bond with her sister Angela, and the profound grief she endured after losing Angela to cancer. In this episode: [00:00:57] Family Dynamics – Janine discusses her role as the youngest of seven siblings and her relationship with Angela. [00:02:52] Childhood Memories – Stories of Angela caring for Janine and their shared childhood experiences. [00:06:20] Role Reversal – How Janine stepped up as a caregiver after their mother’s death. [00:15:00] The Other Half – Janine talks about Angela being her other half and how their connection was spiritual and deep. [00:27:00] Coping with Loss – Janine shares how she dealt with grief, including feelings of anger and bargaining with God. [00:36:49] Angela's Battle – Details on Angela’s diagnosis, treatments, and the emotional toll of caregiving. [00:47:08] Honoring Angela – How Janine continues to honor Angela’s memory through personal projects like writing a book. This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Janine: Facebook: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: https://x.com/survivingsibpod Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Sidney Loses Dottie To Addiction
10/30/2024
Sidney Loses Dottie To Addiction
In this deeply personal and emotional episode, Sidney Savoie shares the story of his sister Dottie, who tragically passed away from a drug overdose in August 2020. Sidney opens up about their childhood, growing up as siblings with contrasting personalities, and the powerful bond they shared despite their differences. Dottie was adopted into Sidney's family before he was born, and Sidney reflects on how much he owes his existence to her. Growing up with a passionate and vibrant sister, Sidney recalls their sibling rivalry and their eventual maturing relationship in adulthood. He paints a vivid picture of Dottie’s larger-than-life personality, her struggles with mental health, and the addiction that ultimately claimed her life. Sidney discusses the complexities of Dottie's struggles with depression, bipolar disorder, and addiction. He speaks candidly about her battle with drugs, and how despite periods of sobriety, Dottie eventually succumbed to her addiction. The episode delves into the layers of grief Sidney has faced, from mourning his sister to navigating life without her. Sidney also shares the challenges of losing a sibling, describing how it feels like losing a part of himself. He reflects on the unique pain of sibling loss and the secondary grief of missing out on future milestones, like his sister not meeting his wife or being there for family moments. In this episode: [00:01:00] – Introduction to Sidney and Dottie [00:03:09] – Growing Up with Dottie: Sibling Rivalry and Bonding [00:06:25] – Dottie’s Struggles with Mental Health and Addiction [00:19:10] – Navigating Grief and the Complexity of Addiction [00:29:07] – Dottie's Overdose and the Impact of Her Passing [00:46:00] – Sidney's Reflections on Marriage and Loss [00:55:00] – Sidney's Relationship with His Nieces Post-Dottie [01:00:00] – The Grief Journey: Finding Meaning and Healing This episode is sponsored by The Surviving Siblings Connect with Sidney: Facebook: TikTok: Email: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Kourtney Loses Her Sister To Rett Syndrome
10/16/2024
Kourtney Loses Her Sister To Rett Syndrome
From being born into a family with Kristi already navigating the challenges of Rett syndrome, Kourtney’s story is one of dedication, loss, and profound love. Kristi was born in 1965 with a rare neurological disorder that affects primarily girls, which led her to lose many of her early developmental skills between 6 and 18 months old. The disorder wasn’t formally diagnosed in the United States until 1986, so for the first 21 years of Kristi’s life, the family had no name for what she was living with. Kourtney, the youngest of five, was seven years behind her siblings and grew up with Kristi already in a group home. Kourtney’s relationship with Kristi went beyond that of a typical sibling dynamic. She served as her sister, caregiver, and advocate, navigating the complexities of Kristi’s condition and her family’s evolving needs. Despite the challenges, Kourtney’s memories are filled with light moments and profound connections, like when Kristi laughed at a joke no one thought she would understand, signaling that “she’s in there,” a realization that challenged every assumption they’d been told about her mental capabilities. The family finally received a formal diagnosis of Rett syndrome when Kristi was 21, after a neurologist encountered a presentation by Dr. Andreas Rett, the doctor who discovered the syndrome. This brought a mixture of relief and frustration, as it came too late to change the course of Kristi’s treatment, but finally gave the family a name for what they had been living with for so many years. Kourtney became heavily involved in the Rett community, both as an advocate and later as a professional, dedicating her life to helping other families and teaching children with Rett syndrome how to communicate through eye gaze technology. In this episode, Kourtney shares her journey through anticipatory grief, the lifelong process of caring for a sibling with Rett syndrome, and the unique pain of losing not just a sister, but the person who shaped her identity. She reflects on how her life and career have been deeply intertwined with Kristi’s presence, leading her to work in the Rett community as an advocate and teacher. Kourtney’s story is a testament to the enduring bonds of sibling love, the complexities of grief, and the resilience it takes to rebuild a life after such a significant loss. In this episode: (00:00:55) – Introduction to Kourtney’s Family Dynamic and Kristi’s Early Years (00:10:09) – Understanding Rett Syndrome and the Impact on the Family (00:18:34) – The Evolution of Kourtney’s Role from Sister to Caregiver (00:36:42) – Kristi’s Communication Breakthrough with Eye Gaze Technology (00:46:39) – The Final Years: Health Declines and the Emotional Toll (00:51:41) – Grieving Kristi’s Passing and Finding Purpose in Advocacy This Episode is Sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. Connect with Kourtney: TikTok: Instagram: Facebook: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Ginger’s Loss Of Her Brother To Seizure Complications
10/02/2024
Ginger’s Loss Of Her Brother To Seizure Complications
From childhood memories of Mike singing and dancing to his career as an award-winning blues musician, Ginger’s story is one of love, loss, and the challenges of navigating life after such a tragedy. She delves into the complexities of coping with Mike’s epilepsy, which played a significant role in his passing, and how their family dynamic shaped her grief process. His unexpected passing in 2019, due to complications from epilepsy, left a profound mark on Ginger’s life, as well as on the countless others who were touched by Mike’s vibrant presence and musical talents. This episode explores the deep bond between siblings, the layers of grief, and the resilience needed to move forward when the music stops. Ginger paints a vivid picture of her close relationship with Mike, who was nine years younger and someone she not only viewed as a brother but also cared for with maternal instincts. Ginger opens up about the difficulty of dealing with regret, the loss of her family’s former dynamic, and the struggle to accept that her parents will never be the same after Mike's death. Yet, through it all, she emphasizes the importance of faith in her healing journey, finding solace and strength in her relationship with God as she navigates life without her brother. Ginger offers an intimate look at how grief evolves over time, how she grappled with the second year of loss, and how the love and memories of Mike continue to inspire her. Her story is a powerful reminder that while we may never truly "move on" from losing a sibling, we can find ways to grow through the pain and cherish the memories that live on. In this episode: (00:03:00) - Ginger’s Relationship with Mike (00:20:29) - Coping with Epilepsy and Seizures (00:28:55) - Mike’s Music Career and Legacy (00:36:42) - Dealing with the Unexpected Loss (00:51:41) - Support, Faith, and Family Dynamics This Episode is Sponsored by The Surviving Siblings. Connect with Ginger: TikTok: Instagram: Facebook: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: YouTube: Patreon:
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Jackson Stotlar on Losing His Sister Lauren to a School Bus Accident
09/18/2024
Jackson Stotlar on Losing His Sister Lauren to a School Bus Accident
In this heartfelt episode, Jackson shares the profound journey of losing his younger sister, Lauren, when he was just 10 years old. Jackson reflects on the unique bond they had, with Lauren’s vibrant and fearless personality, and how her sudden death in a tragic bus accident forever changed his family. Jackson opens up about the complex emotions of being the oldest, becoming an only child, and later a big brother again. He also discusses how his family coped with grief and the unique challenges of sibling loss at a young age. Throughout the episode, Jackson shares the evolution of his grief, from the initial stages to his adulthood, and how he continues to navigate it with grace and gentleness. He provides insights into the impact of grief on family dynamics, the complexity of forgiveness, and the importance of creating a community of support. Jackson also touches on his involvement in his family's organization, GrieveWell, which focuses on peer-to-peer support for those navigating loss. In This Episode: (0:00:24) - A Brother's Reflection on Sibling Loss: Jackson recalls his relationship with his younger sister, Lauren, and the impact her fearless nature had on his life. (0:08:58) - The Day Everything Changed: Jackson recounts the tragic day Lauren passed away in a bus accident and the shock that followed. (0:16:12) - Grief and Growth: Jackson reflects on how he and his family dealt with grief in the years following Lauren’s death and the dynamic shift when his younger brother was born. (0:24:57) - Evolving Through Grief: The conversation dives into the lifelong process of grief and how Jackson has experienced it through different life milestones, including preparing for his upcoming wedding. (0:40:00) - GrieveWell: A Community of Support: Jackson shares about GrieveWell, the nonprofit organization his family created to provide peer-to-peer grief support and its impact on those navigating loss. To join GrieveWell’s community of hope and healing, visit them at: Website: Linkedin: Instagram: Twitter: Facebook: Connect with Jackson: Instagram: Connect with Maya: Podcast Instagram: Maya's Instagram: TikTok: Twitter: Website: Facebook Group: The Surviving Siblings Podcast YouTube: Patreon:
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