Understanding The Foster Care to Prison Pipeline with Desmond DeRoo and Sara DeRoo - Ep 156
Release Date: 07/29/2024
Building Resilience: DBT Techniques for Overcoming Adoption-Related Challenges with Sharon Stein McNamara - Ep 184
Unraveling Adoption
"So the piece that I most resonate with the Dialectical Behavior Therapy is it's one of the therapies that really understands this core feeling of feeling overwhelmed and like you don't want to be alive." - Sharon Stein McNamara EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Sharon Stein McNamara, a licensed psychologist and adoption-competent therapist. Sharon, an adoptee herself, shared her personal journey and the profound impact of adoption on her life, particularly during her adolescent years when she faced suicidal thoughts after a breakup....
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Breathwork and Healing: A Journey Through Adoption Trauma with Kellan Bacon - Ep 183
Unraveling Adoption
"I was one of these slight skeptics; I was like, well I've been breathing all my life, what can breathwork do for me?" -- Kellan Bacon Hear the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JKBNQJYFFZT18Z0XSMHHTH37 EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kellan Bacon, a gender-expansive, transracial adoptee from China, who was adopted as an infant in 1998 and now resides in Cardiff, Wales. Kellan has recently launched a professional practice called Kai Ming Holistics, where they utilize breathwork and other embodied...
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Responding to the Siren Call: Navigating Birth Family Connections with Susan Kiyo Ito - Ep 182
Unraveling Adoption
"I think she had a deep ambivalence about me, knowing me, having a relationship with me from the very beginning." -- Susan Kiyo Ito Read the transcript of this episode here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Susan Kiyo Ito, a writing professor and author of the memoir I Would Meet You Anywhere. Susan's book, a culmination of 30 years of work, explores her journey as a biracial adoptee—half Japanese and half white—who was adopted at three and a half months old by Japanese American parents. We delved into Susan's origin story, her...
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The Rebellious Adoptee: Finding Healing and Community After a Traumatic Childhood with Dave Sanchez-Brown - Ep 181
Unraveling Adoption
"The most healing thing for me now has been the support of other adoptees." -- Dave Sanchez-Brown Read the transcript of this episode here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JJD8EF1R7VJ6J0V5GXRWXJY4 =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Dave Sanchez-Brown, an adoptee who has bravely navigated the complexities of adoption, mental health struggles, and addiction. Dave shared his adoption story, which took a significant turn after he read Dani Shapiro's memoir Inheritance. Inspired, he decided to take a DNA test, leading...
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Adoption in India: Insights from an Adoptee Therapist with Dr. Asra Ali - Ep 180
Unraveling Adoption
"It's a deep rooted fear of every adoptive parent that the parent will get rejected." - Dr. Asra Ali Read the transcript of this episode here: =============== Join Unraveling Adoption's in-person Adoption Healing Quest in Seal Beach, CA on February 8, 2025. More info and registration here: =============== EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Dr. Asra Ali, an adoptee from India whose adoption was facilitated by Mother Teresa. Dr. Asra shared her unique adoption story, highlighting the positive experiences she had growing up in a loving...
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From Secrets to Self-Discovery: A Late Discovery Adoptee’s Story with Brad Ewell - Ep 179
Unraveling Adoption
"I was able to kind of reinvent myself into who I probably would have been at some level had I not been adopted." -- Brad Ewell Read the transcript: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the honor of speaking with Brad Ewell, a late discovery adoptee (LDA) who learned about his adoption at the age of 48. Brad shared his shocking journey of self-discovery after taking an ancestry DNA test, which revealed a truth that had been hidden from him for nearly five decades. He discussed the confusion and betrayal he felt upon learning that everyone around him had known he was...
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REPLAY Behind the Scenes of Because She's Adopted: A Filmmaker's Journey with Kristal Parke - Ep 178
Unraveling Adoption
"I truly felt the weight of the world telling the story. I felt like it was a great responsibility, but I had to do it." -- Kristal Parke Read the Transcript here: https://app.swellai.com/t/tp_01JG7AR0SN4Y6M7WW6E7WEK0AT EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Kristal Parke, a talented filmmaker and adoptee, about her acclaimed documentary, Because She's Adopted. As we kick off 2025, we are excited to offer a replay of our conversation, which dives deep into the complexities of adoption and the personal journey Kristal undertook while...
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From Control to Acceptance: Parenting Through Grief with Jessica Fein - Ep 177
Unraveling Adoption
"We followed her lead. And so there was a lot of laughter and there was a lot of beauty." -- Jessica Fein Read the episode transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Jessica Fein, an adoptive mother and author of the memoir Breath Taking: A Memoir of Family, Dreams, and Broken Genes. Jessica shares her family's deeply moving and complex journey through adoption and the heartbreaking experience of losing her middle child, Dalia, to a rare genetic disorder. We began by discussing Jessica's family's path to adoption, which was...
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Unraveling the Layers of Childhood Trauma with Ron Jenkins - Ep 176
Unraveling Adoption
"I didn't realize how strong I was until, you know, I got into therapy and started to understand all the things that I've overcome." - Ron Jenkins Read the transcript of this episode here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the privilege of speaking with Ron Jenkins, a remarkable individual whose journey through the complexities of foster care and adoption is both harrowing and inspiring. Ron's story begins with the tragic loss of his mother as a young child, leading him and his siblings into the foster care system. He was eventually adopted by a woman who, rather...
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Abortion and Adoption: Insights from Sociological Research with Gretchen Sisson - Ep 175
Unraveling Adoption
"I use the language of supply and demand because this is a market-based system and it's uncomfortable for a lot of people, right? Because you're talking about a supply and demand of human beings." -- Gretchen Sisson Read the transcript here: EPISODE SUMMARY: In this episode of Unraveling Adoption, I had the pleasure of speaking with Gretchen Sisson, the author of the acclaimed book Relinquished: The Politics of Adoption and the Privilege of American Motherhood. Gretchen's work stems from a decade-long qualitative sociological study that delves into the experiences of relinquishing...
info_outline“Love is the biggest and best thing that she did — unconditional love." Desmond DeRoo
EPISODE SUMMARY:
In this episode of the podcast, I had the privilege of speaking with Desmond DeRoo, a 30-year-old currently serving his second prison term in Michigan. Desmond, who was adopted by Sarah DeRoo at the age of five after being in the foster care system, shared his experiences of growing up as a biracial child in a small white town in Michigan. Despite facing intense early childhood trauma and struggles with impulsive behavior, Desmond emphasized the importance of unconditional love and support from his adoptive family, especially his mother, Sarah.
Desmond provided valuable advice for struggling youth, emphasizing the importance of finding one's passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for one's actions. He also highlighted the significance of seeking community support and resources, especially for adoptive parents facing challenges in raising their children.
The episode shed light on the failures of various systems, including the foster care, education, and criminal justice systems, in supporting individuals like Desmond. It underscored the need for greater awareness, empathy, and proactive intervention to prevent marginalized youth from falling through the cracks and entering the prison pipeline.
Overall, Desmond's resilience, wisdom, and commitment to helping others serve as an inspiration for adoptive parents and individuals navigating trauma and adversity. His and his mom’s joint message of hope and empowerment resonates with the importance of building supportive communities and advocating for systemic change to create a more inclusive and compassionate society.
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📆 Community Calendar: UnravelingAdoption.com/Calendar
✨Healing the Adoption Constellation database: UnravelingAdoption.com/Healing
💌Sign up for our Unraveling Adoption email list: http://eepurl.com/hVIAVX
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RESOURCES:
Desmond and Sara’s information:
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Connect with Desmond and Sara through their website: https://lovingdesmond.com/
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Buy their book through Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Loving-Desmond-DeRoo/dp/B0CZPHNS9K
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Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lovingdesmondbook/
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Follow on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100090386023261
Other Resources:
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Statistics about foster care and prison that were mentioned in the intro: https://cepr.org/voxeu/columns/foster-care-prison-pipeline
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APtitude Support Group for Adoptive Parents Facing Adoption’s Challenges: http://UnravelingAdoption.com/APtitude
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Other Parents Like Me - http://oplm.com
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Heather Ross - Life Coaching for Parents who have a child struggling with addiction: https://heatherrosscoaching.com/
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Unraveling Adoption is produced and hosted by Beth Syverson
Music written and performed by Joseph Nakao
Email questions or comments to [email protected]
Find us on Facebook, Instagram, and YouTube
Support Unraveling Adoption on Patreon: http://Patreon.com/UnravelingAdoption
Check out our website: http://UnravelingAdoption.com
Create your own podcast through Libsyn: https://signup.libsyn.com/?promo_code=ADOPTION
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TIME STAMPS:
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00:00:00 - Introduction: Beth Syverson introduces herself and her role as an adoptive mom, setting the stage for the podcast episode.
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00:02:41 - Foster Care to Prison Pipeline Statistics: Discussion on the statistics and challenges faced by former foster children in the criminal justice system.
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00:06:29 - Desmond and Sara's Background: Introduction to Desmond and Sara DeRoo's story, highlighting their experiences with adoption and trauma.
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00:09:12 - Desmond's Early Trauma and Challenges: Desmond's struggles as a biracial child in a small white town, his impulsive behavior, and encounters with the criminal justice system.
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00:12:00 - Sara's Parenting Journey: Sara's experiences as a widow raising six adopted kids and blending families, navigating the complexities of adoption.
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00:19:12 - Impact of Education System on Desmond: Discussion on how the education system failed Desmond and contributed to his path towards prison.
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00:25:48 - Advice for Adoptive Parents: Desmond and Sara share advice for parents, emphasizing the importance of love, support, and seeking help.
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00:35:16 - Desmond's Advice for Struggling Youth: Desmond offers advice for struggling youth, focusing on finding passion, surrounding oneself with positive influences, and taking responsibility for actions.
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00:42:09 - Desmond's Future Plans Post-Prison: Desmond discusses his plans post-prison, including working with kids and using his experiences to help others.
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00:46:55 - Final Thoughts and Advice on Adoption Journey: Desmond and Sara emphasize the importance of community, seeking support, and being open about struggles in the adoption journey.