Parenting: A Spontaneous Mutual Unfolding of Potential with Dr Gordon Neufeld

Hosted by Rosemary Davies-Janes 

Produced by J’aime Rothbard

Join us for this rich, frank conversation that roves from Gordon’s own boundless curiosity and shame -free upbringing, to the eternal wisdom of his bestselling book, Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More than Peers. In addition to speaking about parenting, grandparenting, and the source of emotional well-being, he touches on his initial encounter with fellow UBC student, Gabor Maté, who, after being one of Gordon’s, “best students, ever,” collaborated with him on his book.

Dr Neufeld’s approach to parenting prioritizes emotional connection, understanding, and the therapeutic power of play. He also highlights the:

- Importance of love and togetherness, both of which are essential for human development, ongoing relationships and emotional health.

- Two critical keys to parenting, right relationships and soft hearts, which flourish in caring environments in which children are naturally dependent on their caregivers.

- Concept of cascading care, where we can depend on one another in a network of support, is contrasted with the current emphasis on independence, which often undermines relational needs.

- Impact of technology on parenting and children's emotional health is noted, and parents are urged to engage with their children meaningfully amidst the distractions of screens and digital media.

Throughout this conversation, Gordon stresses the need for parental emotional awareness to help our children navigate their feelings, particularly in today’s plugged in culture which is rife with emotionally challenging media and convincingly presented misinformation. 

About Dr Gordon Neufeld
Dr. Neufeld’s life’s work has been to help adults provide the conditions for children to flourish. He has worked as a clinical psychologist with youth, children, and those responsible for them, for over five decades. A foremost authority on child development, stress, trauma and resilience, Gordon is also the best-selling author of the timeless book, Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

Having stepped back from his University teaching and clinical practice, Dr. Neufeld not only enjoys being an involved father of five and grandfather of seven, but continues to lead the interpretation of the developmental paradigm. 

His widespread reputation for making sense of complex problems, opening doors for change, and his obvious passion for his work, keep him very active on the international speaking stage.

Gordon also directs the Neufeld Institute, the global virtual educational organization and charitable foundation he established in 2006
to support parents, educators and helping

professionals in applying developmental science to the task of raising children. Over the past two decades, he has devoted much of his time to creating over 40 courses for educators, parents and professionals, which are now offered in 10 languages, primarily through the Neufeld Institute. 

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Resources:

Websites: Neufeld Institute

Neufeld Institute Courses

Neufeld Institute Free Resources

Relevant Links:
Adding the Wisdom of Play to the Wisdom of Trauma (Article)

Podcasts: The Hidden Dangers of Peer Influence, What Fresh Hell Podcast, 2024

Rennet Wong Gates Episode, The Gifts of Trauma Podcast, 2024, 

Videos: Relationships Matter Presentation

The Wisdom of Dependence Presentation

Books: Hold On to Your Kids: Why Parents Need to Matter More Than Peers

Reclaiming Our Students: Why Children Are More Anxious, Aggressive,
and Shut Down Than Ever – And What We Can Do About It  

Rest, Play, Grow: Making Sense of Preschoolers (Or Anyone Who Acts Like One)

Nourished: Connection, Food, and Caring for Our Kids (And Everyone Else We Love)

The Heart's Code: Tapping the Wisdom and Power of Our Heart Energy

The Last Self-Help Book You'll Ever Need: Repress Your Anger, Think Negatively,
Be a Good Blamer, and Throttle Your Inner Child

Quotes: "I move in a psychological and therapeutic world and I can tell you without bias, that
Gordon‘s understanding of child development is just deeper than anybody else’s on the
planet and I highly recommend his work.  I’ll just finish by saying that my own work has been
so deeply informed by Gordon’s that I can’t even imagine it without it so this has been, at
least for me, an essential partnership." - Dr. Gabor Maté

“Our body’s wisdom can take care of us by disconnecting from that which is too painful to
bear. However, we are not meant to stay in this disconnected state. Gabor says, “We have
to work our way back to feeling, when we are ready.” I’m going to suggest we can play our
way back to full feeling as well.”  - Dr Gordon Neufeld

“Our mission is to use developmental science to make sense of children to the adults
responsible for them. Our instrument is the attachment-based developmental approach as
synthesized and articulated by Dr. Gordon Neufeld. Our hope is that the insights provided by
this evidence-based theory will rejoin parents, teachers and helping professionals to their
natural intuition. Our evidence-based belief is that children are meant to be raised in the
context of relationship to those who are responsible for them. - Neufeld Institute

Social Media Handles:

Facebook: @neufeldinstitute

Instagram: @neufeldinstitute

YouTube:   @neufeldmedia