loader from loading.io

Episode 30 | Speaking equitably with confidence

Hey White Women

Release Date: 03/20/2025

Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep48 | Purity Prison show art Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep48 | Purity Prison

Hey White Women

In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca dive into themes of creativity, body image, cultural conditioning, and the lingering impacts of cult and purity culture. Daniella shares her journey of transforming clothing and crafts as a form of healing, while Rebecca draws connections between whiteness, consumerism, and self-imposed restrictions on bodies and identities. Together, they unpack how purity culture manifests in practices like “purity balls,” clothing expectations, and even shower habits, connecting these to deeper systems of control rooted in patriarchy, whiteness, and colonization....

info_outline
Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep47 | Main Characters show art Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep47 | Main Characters

Hey White Women

In this episode, Rebecca and Daniella (Knitting Cult Lady) dive into the intersections of social conditioning, cult dynamics, whiteness, and language. The conversation begins with Daniella’s reflections on color, identity, and creativity, connecting personal expression (knitting, design, aesthetics) to larger cultural narratives. Together, they explore how white women are socialized into “Sleeping Beauty” and “main character” frameworks—delusions that foster passivity, entitlement, and distorted views of desirability. From there, they interrogate purity culture and linguistic...

info_outline
Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep46 | Communalism show art Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | ep46 | Communalism

Hey White Women

In this rich and emotionally resonant conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young and Rebecca dive deep into the intersections of community, capitalism, creativity, and healing. They explore how authentic relationships—both personal and professional—can serve as a foundation for meaningful work and social change. From profit-sharing models to communal living, from the trauma of systemic abuse to the joy of unexpected gifts, the episode is a tapestry of lived experience, vulnerability, and visionary thinking. The conversation organically weaves through topics like: The difference between...

info_outline
Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | Episode 45 | Paperwork Privilege & More show art Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer | Episode 45 | Paperwork Privilege & More

Hey White Women

In this episode, Rebecca and Daniella weave between personal stories, cultural critique, and nuanced discussions of race, privilege, and community building. Daniella shares her upcoming RV book tour, the planning quirks of packing crafting supplies, and the deliberate choice to travel through Canada to avoid unsafe environments in the U.S. The conversation pivots into an exploration of “paperwork privilege,” contrasting how bureaucratic systems treat white people versus Black people, and the mental toll of anticipating discrimination even when no harm occurs. They address audience...

info_outline
Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer Episode 44 | Community is inconvenient show art Hey White Women with Knitting Cult Lady and White Woman Whisperer Episode 44 | Community is inconvenient

Hey White Women

In this rich, wide-ranging conversation, Daniella and Rebecca reflect on systems of power, whiteness, deconstruction, and community. They begin by discussing "front-of-room advantage"—how audiences are conditioned to trust authority figures just because they're positioned at the front. This leads into critiques of white supremacy, especially how it shapes comfort, trust, and the way people engage with authority, learning, and community. They emphasize that community is inconvenient—it requires work, discomfort, and relationship with those who challenge you. Daniella speaks from her...

info_outline
Episode 43 | Detangling White Supremacy show art Episode 43 | Detangling White Supremacy

Hey White Women

This episode is a wide-ranging conversation between Daniella and Rebecca about power, privilege, whiteness, and the dynamics of control in both personal and societal contexts. They share personal stories and cultural analysis to unpack how whiteness shapes perspective, behavior, and expectations; the illusion of confidence in white male leadership; and why fear of hypothetical harm dominates many white cultural narratives. The discussion explores the American Dream as a harmful myth rooted in capitalism and scarcity mindsets, and draws parallels between cult tactics and systemic control...

info_outline
Episode 42 | The Language of Systems show art Episode 42 | The Language of Systems

Hey White Women

This episode dives into the cultural and personal narratives around productivity, storytelling, and the illusion of being “caught up.” Rebecca and Daniella explore the language we use—like “caught up,” “trappings of success,” and “by the book”—and unpack how these phrases reveal underlying systems of control and whiteness. They discuss the tension between wanting to create art and resisting the structures that commodify it, the permanence (and pressure) of publishing books versus the fluidity of online work, and the ways capitalism and cult-like systems shape our ideas of...

info_outline
Episode 41 | George Washington Didn't Have Wooden Teeth show art Episode 41 | George Washington Didn't Have Wooden Teeth

Hey White Women

In this fiery, funny, and no-holds-barred conversation, Rebecca and Daniella go deep on why everything in America feels like a cult. From MLMs to marathons, publishing to patriotism, they expose the unspoken systems that keep us exhausted, competitive, and obedient. Together, they unpack the cult of white womanhood, the lie of the silver bullet of success, and the performance of exceptionalism that so many white institutions demand. Connect with Rebecca at:       Connect with Daniella at: You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here....

info_outline
Episode 40 | Is Whinnie the Pooh A WS Cult? show art Episode 40 | Is Whinnie the Pooh A WS Cult?

Hey White Women

In this candid and wide-ranging conversation, Daniella Mestyanek Young unpacks how cult dynamics shape everyday life—from the military to motherhood, from corporate jargon to childhood punishments over “scowling at the Word of God.” She and Rebecca dig into the subtle and overt ways white supremacy trains white women into compliance and calls it safety. Daniella also breaks down the coded messages in American media—including her darkly hilarious theory that Winnie the Pooh is a cult. Through stories of her upbringing, military career, and anti-racism work, Daniella helps listeners...

info_outline
Episode 39 | Living Rooms are for LIVING show art Episode 39 | Living Rooms are for LIVING

Hey White Women

In this episode, Daniella and Rebecca unpack what happens when white belief in institutional fairness collides with the lived reality of systemic injustice. Daniella reflects on a moment of betrayal in traffic court and how it cracked open her assumptions about justice, privilege, and whiteness. The conversation weaves through topics like the myth of rule-following as protection, the military's blending of cultural vernaculars, and the unique disorientation white women face when systems stop working for them. They also explore how white women’s fear of “doing it wrong”—especially...

info_outline
 
More Episodes

In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca delve into the complexities of cult dynamics, particularly focusing on the Nation of Islam. They explore personal experiences with cults, the intersection of race and cults, and the societal responses to these groups. The discussion highlights the role of white women in these conversations, the importance of listening and learning from diverse experiences, and the manipulative tactics employed by cults. The speakers emphasize that conflict can be a necessary part of understanding and navigating these topics, and they advocate for a more nuanced approach to discussing race and identity within the context of cults. In this conversation, Daniella and Rebecca explore the complexities of racial discussions, the importance of asking questions, and the role of community in understanding different perspectives. They delve into the nuances of consumer privilege in content creation, the challenges of neurodiversity, and the impact of cultural practices on comfort and community. The discussion also touches on the significance of authenticity, self-reflection, and the dynamics of rebranding in personal and societal contexts.

Connect with Rebecca at:

The White Woman Whisperer Website

 

The White Woman Whisperer Patreon

 

The White Woman Whisperer TikTok

 

Connect with Daniella at:

You can read all about that story in my book, Uncultured-- buy signed copies here. https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured
For more info on me:
Patreon: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding
Cult book Clubs (Advanced AND Memoirs) Annual Membership: https://bit.ly/YTPLanding
Get an autographed copy of my book, Uncultured: https://bit.ly/SignedUncultured
Get my book, Uncultured, from Bookshop.org: https://bit.ly/4g1Ufw8
Daniella’s Tiktok: https://bit.ly/3V6GK6k / KnittingCultLady
Instagram:  https://bit.ly/4ePAOFK / daniellamyoung_ 
Unamerican video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/YTVideoBook
Secret Practice video book (on Patreon): https://bit.ly/3ZswGY8
Fundraiser for Culting of America book publishing https://tr.ee/fldwYRFTJI

Takeaways

  • Conflict is not inherently negative; it can lead to growth.
  • Understanding cults requires listening to ex-members' experiences.
  • Cults often share similar patterns regardless of their cultural background.
  • The intersection of race and cult dynamics is complex and nuanced.
  • White women have a unique role in discussing race and cults.
  • Cults manipulate societal discontent to recruit and control members.
  • Listening to diverse experiences enriches understanding of cult dynamics.
  • Language and perception play significant roles in how cults are viewed.
  • Personal experiences with cults can reveal broader societal issues.
  • Navigating conversations about race and cults requires sensitivity and awareness.
  • Racial conversations require sensitivity and awareness.
  • Asking questions can lead to deeper understanding.
  • Debunking is less effective than fostering empathy.
  • Community context is crucial in discussions about race.
  • Consumer privilege affects how content is received.
  • Neurodiversity brings unique challenges to social interactions.
  • Self-discovery involves acknowledging past mistakes.
  • Cultural practices shape our perceptions of comfort.
  • Rebranding can obscure the true nature of organizations.
  • Authenticity is rooted in self-awareness and reflection.

Chapters

00:00 Exploring the Nation of Islam and Cult Dynamics
03:19 Patterns in Cults and Personal Experiences
06:28 Intersectionality and the Complexity of Cults
09:18 Cults, Patriarchy, and Social Movements
12:17 Navigating Conversations About Race and Cults
15:07 The Role of White Women in Discussing Cults
18:09 Understanding Intent vs. Impact in Conversations
21:09 Cultural Sensitivity and Personal Growth
24:04 Defining Experiences and the Nature of Cults
26:25 Understanding Cult Dynamics and Personal Experiences
31:17 The Intersection of Race and Cults
37:06 Navigating Conversations About Cults and Identity
42:14 The Role of Questions in Understanding Cults
47:36 Consumer Privilege and Content Creation
53:48 The Evangelizing Phase of Learning and Growth
55:05 Confronting Shame and Acknowledging Complicity
58:04 Cultural Reflections on Space and Society
01:01:21 Romanticizing Narratives and Historical Contexts
01:03:40 The Impact of Climate on Culture and Community
01:08:51 Gaslighting and Control in Systems
01:16:15 Rebranding and Authenticity in Identity
01:21:56 Listening and Respect in Conversations
01:22:32 HWW Intro 16x9.mp4

Produced by Haley Phillips