Episode 123: The Silent Spiral: Hidden Struggles and Racing Thoughts Before OCD Had a Name
Dare To Share Your Untold Story
Release Date: 10/22/2025
Dare To Share Your Untold Story
In this episode, Tracey shares the powerful parallels between the physical scars she carries and the emotional ones she spent years learning to understand. At eight years old, Tracey survived life-threatening burns when a candle ignited her homemade costume. She recalls going into survival mode instantly, brushing off her pain, and learning early on to fix problems quickly and minimize her own needs. This became the pattern that shaped much of her life. Tracey later joined the Coast Guard and found herself walking directly into the wounds of trauma through search-and-rescue missions. She...
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In this episode, Nicole shares the story she once believed she would never speak — the decade of childhood sexual abuse she experienced while the world around her saw a bright, high-achieving, “perfect” young girl. At fourteen, a single, intuitive question from her mother led to a moment of truth that changed everything. Nicole reflects on her mother’s immediate protective actions and the fear, shame, and uncertainty that followed in the aftermath. Nicole describes how she learned to push her emotions down, stay busy, and shape herself into whatever version of “okay” she believed...
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Jennifer was raised to be strong and independent—and she carried that identity proudly. As a critical care nurse, she believed she knew the answers to what it meant to be healthy and well. But life had other lessons waiting. Her journey shifted in 2002, when her second son suffered a massive neonatal stroke just one hour after birth. The experience awakened her to the many gaps in the healthcare system and inspired her to begin bridging those gaps through energy work, nutrition, and exercise. Several years later, on the same day she discovered she was expecting her fourth child, Jennifer...
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Julie’s story unfolds at the intersection of faith, identity, and self-compassion. Raised in a culturally and religiously conservative South Asian household, she grew up surrounded by clear definitions of what was right and wrong — spoken and unspoken rules that guided how one should live and belong. But how Julie was authentically wired didn’t always fit those expectations. The tension between who she was and who she was told to be became an early internal struggle, one she learned to carry as if it were her fault. When Julie was ten years old, she lost her father in a tragic car...
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Felicity’s story is one of survival, silence, and rediscovery after enduring over forty years of physical, emotional, and mental abuse. At ten years old, she witnessed her father attempt to kill her mother with a crystal ashtray — a moment that changed everything and taught her to stay quiet, to shut down, and to carry fear as though it were part of her. Throughout her life, Felicity experienced repeated patterns of abuse. She grew up believing her worth was tied to endurance and her safety to silence — patterns rooted in a long line of generational trauma carried by her grandmother, her...
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In this deeply honest and transformative episode, Jenn Greenhut shares a story that began in quiet emotional suppression and perfectionism—and evolved into a journey of awakening, trust, and healing. As a young elite gymnast training for the Olympics, Jenn was conditioned to dismiss her emotions, believing that worth was only found through flawless performance. She trained intensely, travelled globally, and learned to disconnect from her needs—until a knee injury forced her out of the sport. That moment, she now says, was her body making the decision she couldn’t. Years later, she poured...
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In this raw and courageous episode, Glen opens up about the emotional cost of living behind the badge—sharing how years of witnessing trauma, bottling up pain, and keeping secrets from loved ones quietly unraveled his inner world. He speaks with striking honesty about the toll of suppressing his emotions to maintain a tough exterior, and how it led to walls of disconnection, impulsive choices, and a sense of losing himself completely. Glen describes how PTSD shaped his responses—through recurring nightmares, emotional shutdown, and what he calls “PTSD-influenced decisions” that felt...
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In this honest and thought-provoking episode, Kevin shares his journey of living with racing thoughts that began in childhood—relentless mental loops he couldn’t fully articulate and believed no one else experienced. For years, he suffered in silence, overwhelmed by the belief that he was alone in his struggle. That changed the day he realized others faced similar internal battles—a pivotal moment that reshaped how he viewed himself and his mental health. At age 29, Kevin was diagnosed with OCD, and he describes the emotional resistance that often spiraled into panic attacks—waves of...
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In this profoundly moving episode, Julia shares a deeply personal untold story that begins with loss—the loss of her beloved mother, a woman who wasn’t just a parent, but also her best friend, protector, and guiding compass. As her mother’s health declined, Julia tried to remain fully present, asking tender questions and offering emotional support through the unknowns of anticipated grief. One moment that stayed with her was her mother describing how, as a child, she found comfort sitting beneath the soft canopy of a willow tree. That image became a symbol of comfort and connection—and...
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In this deeply moving and reflective episode, Jennifer Gill courageously unpacks the layered experience of solo parenting, thoughtfully distinguishing it from single parenting. Her journey began in 2007 when her mother-in-law passed away, leaving a wave of grief in the family. Jennifer suddenly found herself juggling the emotional needs of her father-in-law, who was now widowed, while her husband relocated two provinces away for work. At home, she was raising two young daughters—ages 7 and 10—both diagnosed with learning disabilities, which came with their own unique set of challenges. At...
info_outlineIn this honest and thought-provoking episode, Kevin shares his journey of living with racing thoughts that began in childhood—relentless mental loops he couldn’t fully articulate and believed no one else experienced. For years, he suffered in silence, overwhelmed by the belief that he was alone in his struggle. That changed the day he realized others faced similar internal battles—a pivotal moment that reshaped how he viewed himself and his mental health. At age 29, Kevin was diagnosed with OCD, and he describes the emotional resistance that often spiraled into panic attacks—waves of fear so intense, they felt like impending death. He tried to think his way through it, to reason with his mind, but the weight was too heavy to carry alone. Medication became a part of his journey, though navigating this with loved ones was not always easy. He reflects on the frustration of trying to explain his intense emotional reactions—how his stress would ripple out and unintentionally impact others. Despite having a supportive family, he often felt misunderstood, isolated, and overwhelmed by waves of shame and embarrassment. There were moments when he felt himself shrinking—emotionally smaller and further removed from his sense of self. Through time, reflection, and support, Kevin has learned the power of naming his experience and breaking the silence he once lived in. His key message to the listeners is to always keep room for kindness and grace, no matter the situation, especially when dealing with yourself; share your story with people you trust, it really helps to lift the weight off yourself, and there are lots of other positive effects like, the more you hear (your own story), the more you heal.
Guest Bio:
Kevin originally from Monticello, IL, is a passionate mental health advocate, podcaster, writer, and speaker. A lifelong performer with a gift for connecting through both humor and heart, Kevin brings his creativity and compassion into everything he does. His work is grounded in a deep belief in the power of storytelling to break down stigma and foster connection.
He is the host of the mental health podcast Behind Beautiful Things, where each week he welcomes courageous and generous guests to share personal stories of struggle and resilience. By creating space for these conversations, Kevin helps listeners and storytellers alike feel less alone while shining light on the universal truths behind difficult experiences. He is also the author of All Conviction, a Substack publication that blends writing, reflection, and advocacy. Guided by his belief in kindness and humor, Kevin continues to use his voice and platforms to support those navigating mental health challenges and to inspire communities toward empathy and understanding.
Passionate about: Kevin extends his gratitude to the Coalition for Immigrant Mental Health—an organization doing vital work to support immigrants facing mental health challenges, especially during turbulent times in the U.S. Their mission deeply resonates with him, as they offer care, advocacy, and connection to those who often feel unseen.
URL for shoutout:
https://www.ourcimh.org | Coalition for Immigrant Mental Health
Where to find me:
Website: www.kevincrispin.com
Podcast: www.sadtimespodcast.com
Instagram: @behindbeautifulthingspodcast
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/373292146649249