EFR 909: Stop Trying, Start Doing: How to Overcome Fear, Procrastination, and People-Pleasing with Carla Ondrasik

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Author and mindset disruptor Carla Ondrasik unpacks the radical idea behind ‘stop trying’. Carla challenges the culturally accepted virtue of “trying,” revealing it as a fear response that keeps us stuck in inaction and self-sabotage. Through personal stories—from pitching hit songs to Cher to rewriting her own future through visualization—Carla shares why doing, not trying, is the true path to success. This conversation explores how trying shows up in our language, our relationships, and our goals, and offers clear, compassionate strategies for unlearning inherited patterns, setting boundaries, and building a life rooted in clarity and courageous action.

Follow Carla @carlaondrasik

Follow Chase @chase_chewning

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00:01 The Fear Behind Trying - Carla introduces the core message of her book and why trying is often rooted in fear and failure

02:10 Why We’re Addicted to Trying - How instant gratification culture conditions us to avoid real effort and use “trying” as an escape hatch

06:46 Yoda, Gretzky, and the Myth of Noble Trying - Debunking iconic quotes and redefining effort vs. action

12:01 The Try Test: What Does It Even Mean to Try? - Carla’s book-lifting exercise proves that trying is a mental illusion, not a physical act

15:19 Fear, Music Industry Boldness, and Doing Anyway - A powerful story about pitching a hit song to Geffen Records—and why doing beats hesitation

20:16 Excuses Are Just Rocks Under the Bridge - Why action requires clear motivation and how to move through fear by starting small

24:46 Inherited Trying and Manifesting Through Doing - Carla’s unconventional childhood, visualization rituals, and how language shapes outcomes

31:41 The Airport Analogy: Why Trying Isn’t Even an Option - Real-life examples where we would never say “I’ll try”—and how to apply that clarity to everything

36:51 Trying vs. People-Pleasing: The Power of No - Why saying “I’ll try” is often a fear-based way to avoid discomfort—and how to stop doing that

42:41 How to Hold Others Accountable to Doing
Simple scripts to redirect vague language and inspire action in others

46:18 The Best Exercise to Escape the Try Loop - Carla’s top recommendation: become aware of what “try” really means—and reject it

48:06 The Power of Silence and Doing in Private - Why your goals get stronger when you stop announcing them—and how to let results speak for themselves

52:21 Failure, Courage, and Public Vulnerability - Carla shares her fear, failures, and learning curve while writing and launching the book.

56:13 What “Ever Forward” Means to Carla - A personal reflection on living forward with purpose, urgency, and collective inspiration

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Episode resources:

• Save 20% on the Hair Care System from Caldera Lab with checkout code EVERFORWARD at https://www.CalderaLab.com 
• Get your first audio book for FREE with your 30-day trial of Audible at https://www.AudibleTrial.com/everforward
• Watch and subscribe on YouTube
• Learn more at CarlaOndrasik.com