Self Discipline - A Stoic View of Imperfection
Imperfect Mens Club
Episode 43: Self Discipline. A Stoic View of Imperfection Summary In this episode, Mark and Jim explore self-discipline through the lens of Stoic philosophy. They unpack five timeless rules that still hold up in a world full of distractions, dopamine hits, and excuses. The conversation spans modern habits, mental toughness, guilt, accountability, voluntary discomfort, and the deeper connection between self-awareness, self-trust, and real personal growth. The core message: self-discipline isn’t perfection. It’s the small, unglamorous, repeatable reps you keep showing up for. What We...
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Self-Projection, Narcissism & Radical Accountability
Imperfect Mens Club
Short Episode Description In this episode, Mark and Jim unpack self-projection: how it shows up consciously and unconsciously, how it damages relationships, and what radical accountability actually looks like in real life. They explore narcissistic patterns, the difference between healthy self-presentation and fake personas, and why the simple act of pausing might be one of the most powerful tools you have. Along the way, Mark shares hard-won lessons from a deeply toxic relationship and how he rebuilt his emotional maturity in the years that followed. Episode Summary Mark and Jim start from...
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Why 2025 Could Be the Most Consequential Year of Our Lifetime
Imperfect Mens Club
Episode Overview In this episode, Mark and Jim zoom out to the worldview arena of the Imperfect Men’s Club framework and connect four generations, American innovation, AI, capitalism, and historical cycles into one big through-line. The jumping-off point is Jim’s recent trip with his 85-year-old mom to meet his new granddaughter. That experience, paired with a talk he watched about 2025 being a “tipping point year,” sparked a conversation about why history really does repeat itself in 25- and 80-year patterns, how America’s unique mix of freedom and capitalism unlocks innovation, and...
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"I'm Not Good Enough" The Origins And Impact Of Self Limiting Beliefs
Imperfect Mens Club
Episode Summary Mark and Jim dive into the belief that quietly caps potential: “I’m not good enough.” They trace where it starts (childhood messages, school systems, fear, past misses) and how it shows up in adult life: promotions we never ask for, relationships we avoid, work we don’t share, skills we won’t try. Along the way: stories from recruiting, entrepreneurship, parenting after divorce, and reframing regret as proof you care. The Conversation Explores What a self-limiting belief system is Thoughts that feel like facts, internalized from fear, old messages, or past...
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Introspection Without the Spiral: 5 Moves to Get Unstuck
Imperfect Mens Club
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Reframing The Differences Between Men And Women
Imperfect Mens Club
Summary Mark and Jim dive into the “relationships” spoke of the wheel, using a simple moment in a tire shop to unpack a bigger idea: reframing. From there they explore the difference between loving and longing, how past relationships shape current ones, what men and women tend to seek at different life stages, and why self-awareness is the only way any of this works. Mark shares hard-won perspective as a single dad of two daughters and a son; Jim brings a long-married vantage point and a field report from that fish-tank-by-the-waiting-room conversation. The conversation explores...
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Self-Discipline, Routines, and the Quiet Power of Consistency
Imperfect Mens Club
Summary Mark and Jim dig into self-discipline as a daily practice, not a personality trait. They walk through their real-world morning and evening routines, how gratitude and breathwork change your state, why partnerships create accountability, and how three tightly chosen priorities per day compound into a better year. Practical, free, and doable. The conversation explores: What self-discipline actually is: controlling impulses and short-term urges to align with long-term values and intentions, built through practice and simple systems. Morning routines that stick: hydration, oil pulling,...
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Are You A Leader Or Simply In A Position Of Authority?
Imperfect Mens Club
Quick Summary Mark and Jim unpack leadership through the lens of “seasons.” Drawing on John Maxwell’s idea that everyone has a book inside them, they explore how winter, spring, summer, and fall map to personal growth, responsibility, and impact. They also get candid about humility, credibility, and why leadership is more than holding a title—it’s taking responsibility for the well-being of other people. The conversation explores Leadership ≠ Title: The difference between positions of authority and true leadership that models behavior, brings clarity, and takes responsibility for...
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Civil Discourse In A Divided World
Imperfect Mens Club
In this episode of the Imperfect Men’s Club Podcast, Mark Aylward and Jim Gurulé dive into the lost art of civil discourse—why it matters, how we’ve strayed from it, and what it takes to bring it back into everyday life. The conversation explores: Why civil discourse is more than politeness Civil discourse goes beyond surface-level politeness or avoiding conflict. It’s about creating space for real dialogue that expands knowledge, challenges assumptions, and strengthens community. Mark and Jim unpack why this practice is critical for healthy democracies, strong relationships,...
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“Do It Anyway” - The Key To Mining Your Own Personal Gold
Imperfect Mens Club
Short Description Mark and Jim unpack “self-alchemy”—turning your life’s raw materials (skills, reps, scars, notes, half-finished ideas) into something valuable. They connect it to the IMC wheel (Profession, Relationships, Money, Health/Well-Being, Worldview), talk about aligning work with values, and make the case for creating consistently despite criticism, delays, or imperfect outcomes. AI shows up not as artificial intelligence but as amplified intelligence that helps curate and ship your life’s work. The refrain: Do it anyway. What We Cover Self-Alchemy defined:...
info_outlineMark introduces the topic of confidence. Self-confidence
The topic originated with Jim’s interest in elitism - entitlement - self-accountability - confidence
In order to be self accountable, one must be confident
Jim ties in the current news events and his recent book as he frames his view of confidence. Particularly sports and business
He distinguishes between confidence and the competence required to be confident
Jim brings up academia. See civically Harvard…and entitlements/elitism
He shares the academic idea that perfection is attainable. We both support the reality of imperfection
Mark observes that confidence can be under done and over done
He shares his vision of where confidence comes from. Genetic and environment. Confidence starts to develop early
Jim thinks it’s all relative. People have very different perspectives on these issues of elitism and confidence
Jim shares his trade background and how educated people looked down on him and made him feel less than. Jim thinks the more “educated” you are, the less wisdom you have
Mark distinguishes between knowledge and wisdom. He shares his upbringing close to the Boston Ivy League and his disdain for this specific elitism
Mark thinks the family is huge in it’s role of confidence building
Jim moves into sports He agrees about the family influence. Jim thinks sports really emphasizes and exaggerates the importance and influence of confidence. Jim brings up the example of Eli Manning who is referenced in this book as to his mental blocks before winning
They joke about the Giants-Patriots games and Tom Brady comes up as the consummate mind-body guy
Mark connects all the life areas in the wheel and shares his experience when one area is operating at his peak…how the other areas benefit
Mark shares his thoughts about momentum and how contgious confidence can become
Marks ask about ignorance and brings up Mike Tyson as an example of this
Jim references his book again and shares the idea of a mental bank where confidence can be pulled from or deposited into. Managing the highs and lows by ignoring, forgetting and living in the moment
Mark thinks confident people look at failure as an opportunity to learn
Expectation management is required to keep the lows land highs regulated
Jim talks about how some recent wins got him a little high and he’s keeping an eye on being let down
Mark recalls feeling very confident and what a great feeling it is. But, he cautions that when you get that feeling, you have two choices: I deserve this…or I’m grateful for this…and that’s a Big difference. Mark says gratitude creates a “landslide” of more confidence.
Now Jim moves to the next topic from his book…the personal narrative. How the brain can produce adrenaline like a performance enhancing drug
Mark shares his daughter’s experience with anxiety and fear and her overcoming the fear by facing it head on…and your confidence can return. Jim says you can reframe your fear
Mark shares his story about nerves during his 12 year old Little League Allstar game. How his dad talked him down and taught him how to channel nerves
Jim brings up the next topic of filters and the power of reframing your focus toward success versus failures
Mark brings up his “worst case scenario” strategy. If the worst case is a loss…so what. He then shares the value of either ignoring others or paying no attention to the criticisms of others. The mental filters
Persistency and patience are two other qualities Jim brings up in the context of his patents and recent successes
Another point is how little we have control over as we’re trying to accomplish something. Jim also appreciates how you can view the world as happening to you or for you
Mark shares his daughter’s journey to business success…and frames it over the persistence required over 20 years
Then he talks about her generous reference to him as the force that kept her going when she wanted to quit Then Jim asks Mark to recount the time his daughter almost lost her business some years ago to a cease and desist order
Jim believes the Government position to shut her down was just another form of elitism. Both guys think the food and drug departments in government are being fully exposed now
Elitism - entitlement - self accountability - self confidence