Self Identity - It's Hard To Look In The Mirror
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of self identity The guys joke about their lack of Biblical knowledge around God’s statement to Moses “I am who I am” Jim refers to a podcast he heard that mentioned the we’re never ready and you just have to face your fears Mark reflects on his career and how he speaks with everyone he helps about their self identity. It’s the most important part of his work. You have to be able to tell your own story. He thinks most people cannot tell their own story. Jim agrees Mark reads the definition of self identity Mark reflects on the 1000’s of people he’s...
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Reinventing Yourself At Any Age - How To Be Clever About It
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of reinventing yourself in the context of a personal brand. Both guys have been working on their brands. Jim is finishing up a formal effort with his brand Mark puts his career up as a reinvention experience Jim shares his view of how stories and brands have evolved over time and explains why he has made his recent investment of time and money working out his brand and messaging. Contextually he explains this journey as one with three parts. The past, present and future. He talks about the work and the advisor he hired. He brings our 5 key areas of life framework Mark...
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Worldview: Politics, Perspectives & People Who Still Talk to Each Other
Imperfect Mens Club
“You cannot kill a thought. It needs to die of old age or natural causes” Mark introduces the topic of worldview and the different belief systems we all have…and where we get them Jim adds the influence of the political distress specifically in LA and brings in the flywheel Mark clarifies the politics of it all and both guys laugh at how everything is about politics Jim says most of us don’t like to have our belief systems challenged, but agree it’s important to do so Mark reads Jim’s 5w’s assessment…What, why, where, when and who Jim brings up self awareness and Mark agrees...
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Trump Derangement Syndrome And The 10 Commandments
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic by reading the definition and symptoms As much as the guys believe it to be real, it’s also funny Jim asks Mark what “Psychic pathology” means and he takes a shot Jim shares his opinion about friends and family that seem to struggle with this Jim talks about his mom. She exhibits physical manifestations Mark thinks this physical reaction indicates a pretty severe condition Jim calls it impulsive Mark calls Trump insensitive and crass. He’s a fighter and not a politician Mark talks about one friend who is very smart, but can’t remain objective when Trump’s...
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90% Of Life Is Just Showing Up
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic and frames it in the context of his recent experience with having a plumber show up at his home to do some work He shares how gratitude plays a part in the discussion. He expresses a concern that the topic is so rich that staying on topic might be tough Jim reflects on the story Mark has already told him Jim expands on the “Showing up” concept Jim shares his perspective having been a tradesman and having gone into many homes and being treated poorly, more often than not. He applauds Marks treatment of the plumber Jim expands on the notion of appreciation and gives...
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The Disingenuous Epidemic - Cowards, Clowns, and Characters
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of disingenuous people. Both guys have had recent experiences with people who were being disingenuous. Mark asks whether he thinks people are born this way or do become this way based on environment or circumstance. Jim says he’s been using that word more often lately Mark reads the legal definition of the word Jim shares his definition. He clarifies the nuance of this activity being intentional Mark says there are different levels of it, but that some people are just stupid Jim shares his recent encounter with a disingenuous neighbor Deception from the get go. Jim...
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How A Simple Framework Can Help Us Communicate With Candor And Clarity
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark brings up the topic of communication in the context of self talk and self reflection Then he shares a framework Jim brought that he uses for communication. The triple A method Assumptions/Agreement/Action Mark is a fan Jim brings up a favorite quote of his - “The most important conversation you’ll ever have is the conversation you have with yourself”…and that’s a crazy person Mark shares his self talk routine Jim - simply…you have to turn the channel He shares how his mind works. He finds or creates tools to help him. That’s where this AAA framework came from. He uses it to...
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Personal Stories Of Neurodivergence - The Ability To Think Different
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the guys and topic. He cites how aligned both guys are. As they enter the call they’re thinking of the same topics and thoughts Neurodivergence (See definition at the bottom of the show notes) Mark shares a call about his grandson and his current struggles which may well involve him being on the spectrum Jim shared his perspective about labels and crutches and his own story about being neurodivergent himself growing up Jim’s perspective is to reframe this label as an opportunity to think of things differently Neither guy likes meds, but do agree that in some cases they can...
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Beware The "Vortex". Aging Gracefully In Relationships
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of male and female relationships. Jim had brought up the recent Bill Belichick interview with his new 24 year old girlfriend Jim covers our framework and the wheel of life. Relationships is one of the five and women is a subset of that Jim likes looking at life in increments of 10 years. Now we’re both in our 60’s and things have changed Jim brings up the Belichick interview in the context of self awareness and how he was not self aware at all Both guys lost respect for him Mark goes back to his relationship with his girlfriend and brings up how recently he...
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Confidence Isn’t a Trait, It’s a Practice
Imperfect Mens Club
Mark introduces the topic of confidence. Self-confidence The topic originated with Jim’s interest in elitism - entitlement - self-accountability - confidence In order to be self accountable, one must be confident Jim ties in the current news events and his recent book as he frames his view of confidence. Particularly sports and business He distinguishes between confidence and the competence required to be confident Jim brings up academia. See civically Harvard…and entitlements/elitism He shares the academic idea that perfection is attainable. We both support the reality of...
info_outlineMark introduces the topic by reading the definition and symptoms
As much as the guys believe it to be real, it’s also funny
Jim asks Mark what “Psychic pathology” means and he takes a shot
Jim shares his opinion about friends and family that seem to struggle with this
Jim talks about his mom. She exhibits physical manifestations
Mark thinks this physical reaction indicates a pretty severe condition
Jim calls it impulsive
Mark calls Trump insensitive and crass. He’s a fighter and not a politician
Mark talks about one friend who is very smart, but can’t remain objective when Trump’s name comes up
Both guys say they’ve never seen anything like it
Neither guy feels that he’s a bad guy. He’s not treated fairly in their opinion
Neither guy is interested in defending Trump
Mark says if you can’t talk about this guy without losing your shit…it’s likely some form of mental illness
Both guys are more interested in issues than personality
Jim shares another story about his mom and common ground. He also doesn’t tell people who he voted for
He also shares his daughter’s experience and some friends
Mark says people are more nuanced. Liking one issue doesn’t necessarily put you in any other groups, but people do assume and presume
Mark asked Jim’s opinion on what the political climate is like living in California
Mark shares his opinion on living in Florida
Mark shares his experience wearing a Trump shirt
Both guys are entertained by people with TDS
Jim says, in CA people take immediate positions. Red team or blue team
He shares his recent encounter with a woman who got emotional when she discovered Jim’s friend was a Trump guy. She mellowed a bit after getting into the discussion. She expressed pride in being an “American”
The woman brought up the pending law in Texas about hanging up the 10 Commandments in public schools
Jim’s position is against it and Mark disagrees
Mark shares his view of how nuanced this woman was after getting deeper into the discussion
People aren’t as obvious as they might seem to be
Both guys respect people with strong positions. That stand for something and have some humor and self deprecation. Jim has no time for the passive aggressive people who get lost in emotion. He seeks common ground
Mark reminds people that Trump behaves on purpose. It’s a strategy that people with TDS don’t even understand
Jim’s friend asked her where she was from and she dug into being an American
The discussion became more interesting after a few drinks
Mark cites this an another example of why we can’t assume things about people and their beliefs
Mark feels that Trump has repositioned the US as a strong nation
Jim explains the political landscape of different areas of CA. Red and blue areas
Jim voted more against the blue team than he did for the red team. He feels his vote didn’t matter, but he also believes in voting. His was a “protest” vote
The guys introduce the 10 Commandments topic that this woman asked about
Jim agreed with the woman. No religion in the school
Mark disagrees. He feels that the US was founded on Judeo Christian values so putting the Commandments in schools is OK. It’s different than teaching religion
Both guys add context to their positions. They agree to disagree go deeper into their respective positions
Mark shares the 10 Commandments and each guy gives his thoughts about each and some of the hypocrisy around sins
Mark feels like the TDS people hold Trump to a higher standard than others
Mark share the last 7 Commandments and suggests they would provide for a good life without the religious flavor
Mark feels that Christianity can’t be watered down
Mark shares his position on his faith and his awareness that other people might push their beliefs on others
He shares his opinion on Notre Dame’s celebration of Pride month and his response
He shares his response about the difference between “accepting” others and “promoting” others