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The Good Girl Tax: Why You Don’t Trust Yourself (And How to Fix It)

Wild Medicine

Release Date: 05/05/2026

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More Episodes

FREE RESOURCE:  Try our Burnout Archetype Quiz: https://twc-jqgxs.involve.me/archetype-quiz

In this episode of Wild Medicine, Dr. Michelle Peris explores the themes of self-trust, the Wild Woman archetype, and the impact of good girl conditioning on women's emotional awareness and relationships. 

She discusses the importance of understanding sensory data, setting boundaries, and recognizing incongruence in relationships. 

The conversation emphasizes the need for effective communication skills and the cost of overanalyzing interactions. 

Dr. Peris also introduces the concept of the fawn response, highlighting how hypervigilance can lead to disconnection from one's own needs and desires. 

In this conversation, Dr. Michelle Peris delves into the complexities of overthinking, the impact of good girl conditioning, and the importance of setting boundaries.

She emphasizes how the nervous system plays a crucial role in our responses to perceived threats and how societal conditioning can lead to self-doubt and compliance. 

Through personal anecdotes and insights, she encourages women to trust their instincts and recognize the data their bodies provide, ultimately advocating for a more empowered and authentic way of living.

 

Takeaways

  • The Wild Woman archetype encourages women to embrace their true selves.

  • Good girl conditioning can lead to a lack of self-trust.

  • Understanding sensory data is crucial for setting boundaries.

  • Congruence in relationships is essential for emotional health.

  • Overanalyzing others' behaviour can lead to confusion and resentment.

  • Effective communication skills are vital for expressing needs.

  • The fawn response can cause disconnection from one's own emotions.

  • Rewilding involves reclaiming one's emotional awareness.

  • Self-trust is foundational for healthy relationships.

  • The cost of not addressing incongruence in relationships is high. Your nervous system is trained to protect you from perceived danger.

  • Good girl conditioning leads to a deep association between compliance and self-worth.

  • Setting boundaries can feel threatening due to past conditioning.

  • Overanalyzing relationships often stems from a desire for safety.

  • The discomfort you feel is a signal of an imbalance, not a betrayal.

  • Honesty in relationships fosters intimacy and connection.

  • Women often struggle to set boundaries due to fear of conflict.

  • Recognizing the mismatch between words and actions is crucial for self-trust.

  • Small adjustments in behaviour can lead to healthier boundaries.

  • Trusting your own data is essential for personal empowerment.

 

Chapters

00:00 Introduction and Personal Reflections

04:10 Exploring the Wild Woman Archetype

06:41 The Good Girl Tax and Self-Trust

09:10 Understanding Sensory Data and Boundaries

11:34 The Importance of Congruence in Relationships

13:57 Navigating Incongruence and Self-Trust

16:54 The Role of Hypervigilance in Good Girl Conditioning

19:25 Rewilding and Emotional Awareness

21:57 The Cost of Overanalyzing Relationships

24:49 Communication Skills and Emotional Processing

26:48 The Fawn Response and Emotional Regulation

36:45 Understanding the Nervous System's Role in Overthinking

38:05 The Impact of Good Girl Conditioning

40:04 Recognizing the Mismatch Between Words and Action

43:01 The Exhaustion of Overanalyzing Relationships

45:57 The Cost of Inaction and Overanalysis

50:23 The Importance of Setting Boundaries

55:20 Navigating the Fear of Being Seen as Difficult

59:07 Practical Steps to Adjust Boundaries

01:03:14 Understanding the Nervous System's Response to Boundaries

01:06:38 Building Trust in Oneself Through Data Awareness

 

Stay Wild.

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