Vol. I, No. 4. Best Ways to Find the Best, Part 1.

A gavel is donated, the Society begins a new fundraising endeavor, listeners launch a “fan” group with transcription efforts. In the main discussion, this first of two parts lays the foundation for the Society’s main project of finding the best products, services, and methods—introducing and depicting the problem to be solved.

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N.B.: For disclaimers, rules, and prefaces, see Vol. I, No. 1.

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Minutes of the Meeting.

For corrections to this issue, see errata of future issues.

The meeting of the Sisyphian Society was held on Tuesday, 14 July 2020, remotely, the co-chairs pro tempore being in the chairs and the secretary being present.

0:00:38 Refreshments. Called again for Dunkin’ to sponsor Proceedings. Discussed Kyle’s potentially misunderstood comments about Dunkin’ in Vol. I, No. 2. Played interview clip, sent in by Mr. A., to serve as apology. Praised Dunkin’s definitionally freshly made donuts. Discussed Dunkin’s name change.

0:05:41 Meeting called to order with first rap of the Fraudulent Gavel. Gavel was provided by Sorkness Machine, “your first choice for custom manufacturing needs”, marking Society’s first tangible gift from a listener and first corporate patron since publication of Proceedings began. Discussed questionable Lincoln Logs-esque audio profile of gavel and sounding block; authentic Apexstone gavel Kyle assumes Sorkness Machine purchased [buy on Amazon]; (non-Apexstone) gavel Kyle actually received [buy on Amazon], (poorly) wrapped in Apexstone packaging. Considered investigating vast underground counterfeit-gavel industry. Discussed using hardcover copy of Robert’s Rules of Order [buy on Amazon] as sound-deadening foundation. Called for other corporate patronage.

0:11:06 Introduced topic of main discussion, to occupy second half of this meeting.

0:14:30 Discussed duration of Proceedings. Discussed indulgence from Vol. I, No. 3, typical podcast formats and lengths, and lengths of most-popular radio show in America (The Rush Limbaugh Show) and most-popular podcast (The Joe Rogan Experience [which had been discussed with regard to Spotify in Vol. I, No. 3]). Cited analysis from JRE Facts (not to be confused with Java Runtime Environment). Mentioned longest episode of Rogan’s podcast (featuring Alex Jones), interdimentional vampires, old sense of apology.

0:19:29 Addressed elephant no longer in room: Matt’s audio.

0:20:35 Errata.

Mentioned Tyler Compromise of 2020. [See Vol. I, No. 3.]

• 0:21:07 Vol. I, No. 2. Correspondence, Scooby-Doo, and Humor.
  • 0:21:10 "two kudos to Mark" was grammatically incorrect, as kudos is an uncountable noun. Kyle asked whether Society should award merits (and demerits) or points instead. Matt will work on developing axiological crosswalk for differentiating three parallel structures for various sorts of praise (and condemnation).
• 0:23:08 Vol. I, No. 3. Talk Radio and Podcasts.
  • 0:23:10 Audio continued to suffer problems, including chair noise. Kyle provided at least partial explanation for marble sounds. Kyle installed a second pop filter.
  • 0:25:16 Matt called issue an “episode” multiple times. Kyle will attempt to correct that particular error in-place from now on.
  • 0:25:24 “We’re goin’ real fast” should have been “We’re goin’ really quickly”.
  • 0:25:37 For accuracy of quotation, “That’ll learn ’em” should have been “This’ll learn ’em”, and “That will teach them” should have been “This will teach them”.
  • 0:26:07 “I don't have the notes that Kyle has, so I never know what’s happening” was libelous. Matt and Kyle are experimenting with a new color-coded shared agenda.
  • 0:26:51 Kyle apologized for not having explicitly extended invitation to wood-burn grandmother’s table to First Official Loyal Fan David.
  • 0:27:43 Award of one kudo(s) to Matt will be grammatically corrected upon development of Matt’s new praise system.
  • 0:27:50 David’s description of first-generation iPod contained numerous errors. See Wikipedia on 1st generation iPod.
  • 0:27:07 Matt had said he never expected to receive “the new or cool thing in . . . in the realm of gifts”. Kyle pointed to the Christmas of knives as further counterexample. Matt disagreed.
  • 0:30:02 Spotify does not truncate show notes. (It just creates every other possible problem with them.)
  • 0:30:18 Kyle had said Spotify paid Joe Rogan $100 million. Exact amount is unknown. Source said it was more than $100 million.
  • 0:30:30 “I actually did try to find any sort of open-source podcast app for iOS and I couldn’t” should have been “free and open-source”. Also, by “iOS” Kyle meant to refer to operating system on iPhones, iPods, and iPads, but Apple renamed operating system for iPad to iPadOS in 2019. Kyle requested new blanket term. Matt suggested “the family of operating systems formerly known as iOS”.

0:32:14 Minutes of the last meeting were approved.

0:32:23 Discussed renaming “Updates” to “Follow-Up”. Matt moved to “give into the modern fads and call this ‘Follow-Up’.” The motion was adopted.

0:34:07 Discussed whether and precisely when to rap gavel upon adoption of motions. Again cited Robert’s Rules of Order [buy on Amazon]. To prevent men bursting through doors, will attempt to use gavel in this way.

0:35:36 Follow-Up.

• 0:35:39 Listeners have still not updated Scoobypedia, despite Kyle’s request in Vol. I, No. 2. Renewed call.
• 0:36:56 Society’s website now appears on first page of Google results, as first, second, and fourth result, for sisyphian society. Search term sisyphian still invisibilized. Set new goal of overcoming that.
• 0:38:39 Society’s call for gavel was heeded. [See above.]
• 0:38:45 No one (successfully) publicly shamed Matt for clicking. Kyle urged listeners to remain vigilant.
• 0:39:21 Follow-Up on Podcasts.
  • 0:39:42 Kyle mentioned benefits of MP3 chapters: built into file, enables various compatibilities with players, more easily recalculated than timestamps. Nevertheless, Kyle believes they remain unusuable, due to length and formatting of chapter titles [as discussed in Vol. I, No. 3].
  • 0:40:33 When Kyle said Spotify could know one’s browsing history, he meant Spotify, not Web, browsing history. [Matt’s not listening to music was discussed in Vol. I, No. 3.] Kyle argued why this is nevertheless a significant problem. Matt suggested listeners should investigate domain of possible advertisements on Spotify.
  • 0:43:16 Kyle discussed why the existence of a free-of-cost Spotify plan is no consolation.
  • 0:43:53 Discussed problems of pointing listeners to website for show notes. Discussed disclaimer now appearing at top of Proceedings’s show notes.
  • 0:45:09 Regarding worry about podcasts replacing human relationships, cited interview in which CEO of iHeartMedia described the podcasting business as one of “providing companionship”.
  • 0:46:24 Kyle had to forego discussing worry about number of young women interested in true-crime podcasts. See “Social Psychologist Amanda Vicary and Spotify Reveal Why Women Are So Obsessed with True Crime—And Share 4 New Podcasts Coming in 2020” from Spotify, “True crime: Five reasons why women love it” from BBC Radio 4, “Why are women obsessed with true crime? Rachel Monroe has some answers” from The Guardian, or “Why Do Women Love True Crime?” from The New York Times, as examples of recent commentary on this phenomenon.
  • 0:47:00 Mentioned painful technique for postponing agenda items.
  • 0:47:20 Kyle mentioned in Vol. I, No. 3 that he could provide his podcast recommendations in that meeting’s minutes. However, he wants to provide commentary on them, so he is postponing those recommendations to future meeting.
  • 0:47:51 As further evidence of Kyle’s arguments about benefits of transcripts, noted that after last meeting, Matt, David, and Kyle were able to find podcast episode David had discussed (about man discovering treasure) only because a transcript of that episode had been published online.
  • 0:49:13 As David and Matt assumed in Vol. I, No. 3, listeners to Proceedings have in fact begun a collaborative transcription project. Listener Mark, whose correspondence had been read in Vol. I, No. 2, has started Sisyphian Society Podcast Forum Facebook group, for discussion about the podcast and transcription efforts. Cited description of group and inaugural post. Discussed benefits of group being fully listener-controlled. Group boasts four members. Called upon 39 other listeners to join group. Suggested members of group decide upon term for themselves. Kyle proposed referring to Mark as Benevolent Dictator. Cited “benevolent dictator for life” tradition. Matt attempted to declare Proceedings “an anti-Hitler podcast”, in violation of Society’s rule about discussing politics [see Vol. I, No. 1]. Disclaimed about myriad problems with Facebook, to be discussed at future meeting. Mentioned "friends of the library" groups as potential model.

0:55:46 Announcements.

• 0:55:53 Have not received any new Apple Podcasts/iTunes reviews. Renewed call. [See Support for instructions.]
• 0:56:03 Proceedings is now in Stitcher.
• 0:56:39 Called for reviews on Stitcher. See Support for instructions.
• 0:56:49 Read Stitcher review from listener “Definitely Not Kyle”.
• 0:57:39 Postponed Kyle’s rant on podcast directory/application “badges”.
• 0:57:58 Vol. I, No. 1 enjoys 122 unique downloads. No. 2 enjoys 98. No. 3 enjoys 73. Suggests both good retention and that doubling duration of issues had (slight) positive effect on listenership numbers.

0:58:33 Appealed to listeners who are not friends or family members of Matt or Kyle to leave voicemail message, for sake of demographic data. [See Correspondence for instructions.]

0:58:53 Treasurer’s report: Society has joined Amazon’s affiliate program. Society will earn small commission on qualifying purchases made, by listeners, using “buy on Amazon” links in minutes. Details available at Disclosures.

1:00:09 Discussed Kyle’s lifelong love of baseball, baseball cards, and baseball cards of Christy Mathewson in particular. Kyle requested a T206 Christy Mathewson HOF Portrait Piedmont 150 PSA 8.5 POP 1 NONE HIGHER slabbed baseball card [buy on Amazon] from listeners or (aspiring) patrons.

1:03:03 General Correspondence.

• 1:03:10 Kyle thanked those who sent unofficial personal correspondence to him but noted it must be passed over due to time constraints imposed by the Tylers. Discussed creating addtional patron-only program in which Matt and Kyle could respond to all correspondence.
• 1:03:53 Postponed voicemail message from Benevolent Dictator Mark.
• 1:04:11 Discussed voicemail message from Kyle’s mother, asking whether it is possible to listen to Proceedings over a telephone call. It is not.
• 1:04:46 Called for correspondence.

1:05:21 Main discussion, on best ways to find the best (Part 1).

• 1:05:33 Introduced topic.
• 1:09:30 Argued the need for a resource for finding the best. Mentioned Thesaurus.com, Apple Maps, Kelley Blue Book.
• 1:13:22 Discussed example of this need (mentioned in Vol. I, No. 1): best way to set, control, and monitor temperature of refrigerator.
• 1:17:47 Discussed further series of examples of this need: Kyle’s recent vehicular saga. Mentioned Yelp, Chick-fil-A, reviews on Google Maps, Angie’s List, Reddit, risk of a cut brake line, discombobulator, Kyle’s “[free and] open-source computer”. (Matt requested listeners send him a Windows 8 (or higher) computer.) Mentioned Jiffy Lube, Firestone Complete Auto Care, John Mulaney on Delta Air Lines, portable car jump-starters, 2006 Chevrolet Impala LS [buy on Amazon], other people complaining about Impala’s foolish trunk-opening design for same reason, Cash App, Venmo, PayPal. Postponed Kyle’s rant about imperial versus metric units. Mentioned car-battery charger Kyle purchased [buy on Amazon (but not recommended)]; need to schedule replacing of products that go bad over time, like batteries and food; inadequacy of word best; COVID-19 pandemic; Bonchon Chicken’s pen-disinfectant method.
• 1:49:40 Summarized takeaways from this Part 1. Finding the best is not a new problem, so humanity has no excuse for having failed to solve. Mentioned Farmers’ Almanac.
• 1:51:50 Introduced Part 2. Discussed what we are not looking for: being nitpicky for the sake of being nitpicky, over-systematizing, Sheldon’s obssessive particularity on The Big Bang Theory. Whenever a multitude of “guides to the best x” already exists, that is itself a sign of the problem and a source of further problems. Mentioned Consumer Reports, Wirecutter.
• 1:55:30 Called for listeners’ correspondence, especially regarding any sources they use to find the best products, services, or methods.

1:56:06 Next meeting’s topic will be Best Ways to Find the Best, Part 2. Hope to give listeners a “fun” issue after that.

1:56:42 Again thanked Sorkness Machine for patronage and called for more corporate patrons. Hope to provide method of non-corporate patronage soon.

1:57:13 Meeting adjourned.

Respectfully submitted,

Kyle, secretary

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“How do any of you have time for hobbies?! Isn’t your whole life just a series of discovering things that are broken that need you to go fix them?!”