Letting Go To Find Balance

When we feel we are losing our balance we grab hold of something to feel secure and to prevent falling. This is a normal reaction to be able to maintain our physical balance and hopefully prevent pain. At that moment of uncertainty, that moment of being out of balance, we would think it strange if someone told us to “just let go.” 

But what about our mental balance? What are we grabbing hold of to feel secure? And are we holding on to hopefully prevent the mental and emotional pains?

In the ancient text, the Yoga Sutras, within the very first few sutras we are told that it is possible to manage the mind. We are given the information about just five different thought patterns that disturb the mind that take us away from balance and the methods to reign them in.

These five thought patterns are said to create vrittis, or whirlpools within the conscious mind and prevent us from seeing our true essence. I’ve always loved the definition of vrittis as whirlpools. I used to do some river rafting and the rough waters of rapids there are sometimes “holes” as rafters call them. This is where water flowing over a rock or other obstacle flows down, then back onto itself in an eruption of whitewater. It creates a whirlpool circling around and around and if a raft goes into one, it can trap that nice buoyant raft and pull it down under the water! 

Now when the Yoga Sutras were written over two thousand years ago, this metaphor didn’t exist. I don’t think there was that sort of river rafting going on. But every time I think about the thought patterns being a whirlpool, this metaphor works for me. I know how often I get stuck in the different patterns of my thinking and how I’ve been pulled down under the water many, many times.

In river rafting, one must be alert and aware to manage the river flowing around the “holes” that will become a trap. In the same way, in yoga, one must also be alert and aware to manage the thoughts flowing that can entrap us, so that we can access the knowledge of our true nature, that aspect of who we are beyond how we present in the world. 

We identify with our thoughts, our vrittis. The Yoga Sutras say that if you can find a way to stop identifying with them, you will “rest” or “abide” in your own true essence. 

I love the commentaries that use the word rest. It implies a time after working, or a sense of being rather than doing. A time when it might be possible to stop the mental battles, to put down the variety of masks we wear in the world, to find a point of balance within the mind that actually exists-and “rest” there.

The five vrittis, or thought patterns are:

1. right knowledge
2. wrong knowledge
3. fantasy 
4. deep sleep
5. memories

These are the whirlpools that keep us from reaching that point of balance where we can “rest.” Let’s take each one and briefly discuss it, but first I want to say that each of these has both positive and negative qualities within them. It’s not about that-the good or bad-it’s about seeing them for what they are. To be able to understand the full spectrum of what each means as it plays out in your life, and by then finding the space between seeing each and the reaction to it.

You might believe that right knowledge doesn’t belong in the list. After all, isn’t yoga with its teachings a form of right knowledge? Isn’t studying to learn anything that helps us be a productive and positive member of society good? Well, yes. That can be toward one end of the spectrum, but what about overindulging in knowledge-such as being a professional student who uses schooling as an escape? Or being fanatical that your knowledge is somehow better than someone else’s? The knowledge itself might not be bad but the ego-driven use of it puts it at the other end of the spectrum. Regardless, the knowledge creates patterns of thought that may take you away from your inner knowing.

What about wrong knowledge? Again, it depends on what it is and how it’s applied. Perhaps you were brought up to believe that no one could love you because you were raised in an unloving family. That’s wrong knowledge, but it can dramatically affect how you relate to others going forward through life. 

But then how can wrong knowledge be good? Well, let’s say you’re a weather geek and the forecast is for a cloudy, rainy and windy day, so you prepare appropriately. But then the approaching storm takes a different course, and the sun comes out and the day turns beautiful. I’ll bet you will think it’s good that the weather forecast was wrong. Actually, in this instance, if you live in Cleveland where I do, the forecast is often wrong so it’s “good” to be prepared for whatever life gives you and be content with it!

Fantasy or imagination can be great! Artist and creatives utilize this to bring beauty and excitement into our lives. However, indulging too deeply into this pattern of thinking can create delusions and other forms of inappropriate behavior.

Are you beginning to understand? It’s not just the vritti but how firmly we are letting it control the mind and manipulate our actions.

So, we are now at deep sleep. Remember that these vrittis are about disturbing our conscious mind and in deep sleep the mind is in a very deep state of unconsciousness. This lack of awareness in this stage of sleep is a vritti. It’s a necessary one to allow the body to recover and repair itself, but because it is an absence of consciousness and actions, it is still a vritti.

Lastly, but definitely not least is memory. I’m sure each of you can see how memories create patterns of thinking, both good and bad and everywhere along the spectrum. Memories are a necessary part of everyday life. Imagine waking up in the morning and not remembering who you are or how to do anything! There was even a movie years ago called “Memento” that was a mystery/thriller based on a rare form of memory loss due to a tragedy. 

Memories can serve us or destroy us. Memories can exert their influence even when they are not in the conscious, self-aware mind. There has been a lot of research in recent years about memories, false memories, the influence of memories, and so on. You see, more than 2000 years ago, memories were considered to be one of the five primary thought patterns that keep us from accessing a higher level of awareness and reaching an understanding of our true nature.

So what are we to do? What’s the answer? The Yoga Sutras say the answer is twofold: Abhyasa and Vairagya.

Abhyasa is a dedicated practice done with faith over a long period of time. These three factors need to be clarified. A dedicated practice requires unwavering discipline. It’s not a meditation practice that’s done irregularly, maybe once a week then three times a week, then take off for a week, and so on. It means that the practice is a daily part of life, and not only that but it must be done with faith! True progress and change occur slowly, and it is somewhat ludicrous to think that practicing in a class once per week, or while on vacation but no other time, is going to yield results! Imagine you wish to become a great musician. Can you practice irregularly for a year or two and achieve this? So why do we think we can change our lives by this pattern? And because it takes a long time, we must have faith. Those changes are small and sometimes too small to even realize, but with faith, you must believe that they will come over the long haul.

The other method of managing the vrittis is vairagya, or non-attachment. Cultivating the ability to “let go” of our attachments and expectations. Think about this. What does it mean to you? Many of our mental disturbances come from the thought patterns associated with what we are attached to and what we expect to happen at any given moment. Take a moment to think about the last time you were upset about something….I can pretty much guarantee that your distress came from being attached to something or expecting a different outcome than what was there facing you.

To practice non-attachment doesn’t mean you give everything away or that you try to create a mental state of detachment. Rather it means that you can fully enjoy life and find emotional contentment regardless of circumstances! You are no longer governed by the situation around you. Everything in your life is “on loan” so to speak. Your relationships, your material belongings, your job, even your emotions and reactions.

There’s a story about the Buddha who was accosted by an angry person who shouted and berated him calling him stupid and a fake. When he stopped, the Buddha turned to the man and asked, “If you buy a gift for someone and that person does not take it, to whom does the gift belong?”

The man was surprised by the question, but answered, “It would belong to me because I bought the gift.”

The Buddha said, “Correct. It’s the same with your anger. If you become angry with me and I don’t feel insulted nor accept your hostility, the anger falls back on you, as it was initially yours to give. You are then the only one who becomes unhappy, not me. All you’ve done is hurt yourself.”

Now that’s a great example of embodiment of non-attachment. Probably one that would be difficult for most of us! But we can start to see where our attachments lie, which thought patterns or vrittis are disturbing our consciousness, and begin to explore and practice forms of yoga that are meant to develop our awareness. 

Feel free to contact me for more information and guidance or visit my website for recorded practices.