Pain Is Your Portal: How To Turn Suffering into Superpowers | Akshay Nanavati

Wellness + Wisdom | Episode 742

Is your fear of suffering keeping you from discovering the deepest treasures of your soul?

Author and extreme adventurer, Akshay Nanavati, joins Josh Trent on the Wellness + Wisdom Podcast, episode 742, to share how embracing suffering during his 60-day solo crossing of Antarctica became the key to transcending limitations and unlocking pure potential, what his journey taught him about the paradox of oneness, and why the only way out of suffering is through it.

"When you stop resisting suffering, it frees you from the grasp of suffering. It's not the suffering in and of itself that I seek. Suffering is the means, not the purpose. The purpose is what it gives you access to. It's the transcendence, the awakening, the breaking down of the illusions, the surrender." - Akshay Nanavati

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In This Episode, Akshay Nanavati Uncovers:

[01:10] 60 Days Alone in Antarctica

• Akshay Nanavati
• 606 Akshay Nanavati | How To Love Your Fear: The (REAL) Secret To Unlocking Your Pure Potential
• How the world shows you more about the human soul than any textbook.
• Why it's a privilege when we can choose our suffering.
• How he confronted his inner demons while crossing Antarctica.
• Why Akshay's biggest mental challenge during the expedition was frustration.
• How the last 10 days felt like he was drunk.
• Why he ended the expedition after 60 days due to a life-threatening medical issue.

[08:45] How to Stay In The Present Moment

• What brought Akshay into moments of oneness and bliss during the expedition.
• The three elements of a raw experience.
• Why he was pushing himself back into the present moment in order to keep going.
• How the only thing he could control was his next step.

[12:40] The Paradox of Oneness

• How we all seek different forms of peak experiences.
• Why the illusion in which we experience life changed for Akshay.
• Fearvana by Akshay Nanavati
• How the opposites encompass the human experience.
• Why the mind creates an illusion of good and bad.
• How Antarctica made Akshay feel very small but also extremely powerful.
• Why love is an experience of both separation and connection.
• How resisting or clinging to duality creates suffering.

[19:40] The Gift of Suffering

• The bigger the dragon we battle, the better the treasure on the other side of the battle.
• Why the human experience is a paradox.
• How suffering is the means to transcendence.
• Why pain connects us to God.
• How Akshay accepts what is instead of resisting suffering.
• Why comfort is not the enemy.

[26:45] Pure Experience

• Why reality is not "either, or."
• How labels create divisions and limitations.
• Why words can open the door for us, but can't provide the same value as experience.
• How mastery is about bringing ourselves back to the center.

[31:40] Stop Attaching to The Outcome

• How Akshay's Antarctica crossing helped him shed the resistance to the outcome.
• Why he's been embracing the process more than the outcome.
• How he plays on the edge in the middle.
• What led Akshay to find more peace within.

[36:40] Don't Be Afraid to Get Off Balance

• 734 Kirk Parsley MD | Sleep As Medicine: How To Sleep Like Royalty + Stop Being Sick
• Why Akshay doesn't feel like the polar expedition was dangerous.
• The importance of allowing ourselves to feel grief.
• 612 Dr. Michael Gervais | Living An Authentic Life: How to STOP Worrying About What People Think of You
• Why stillness isn't the same as doing nothing.
• How getting off balance helps us awaken.

[43:10] The End of The Polar Expedition

• Henry Worsley
• Why Akshay's diverticulitis was caused by extreme stress.
• How his body started falling apart in the last 10 days of the polar crossing.
• Why Antarctica is a mirror to the human soul.
• How Akshay doesn't struggle with solitude anymore, even though it used to be a trigger for drinking.

[47:25] Does Distance Improve Relationships?

• How Akshay channeled the spirit of Viktor Frankl.
• Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
• Why having a conversation with Viktor Frankl helped Akshay understand suffering.
• 538 John Wineland | A New Masculine Paradigm: Leading With Love, Living Your Truth + Healing The World
• How distance showed Akshay how supportive his wife is.
• Why separation makes us feel more connected.

[54:15] Accept The Isness

• Why we're stabbed with two darts of suffering, according to Buddha.
• How bringing conscious awareness to our self-dialogue can help us change it.
• Why all unnecessary suffering is the resistance to accepting the isness.
• How embracing the edge of you makes life more joyful.

[59:00] Feel It All

• Why we need to respect the mystery of God.
• How Akshay saw value in the delusion he was experiencing during the expedition.
• Why we shouldn't rob our children of their lessons.
• How Indian parents tend to over-spoil their kids.
• Why having our kids experience the full range of emotions builds their resilience.
• The only way out of the suffering is through it.

[01:06:30] The Power of Language

• How soft talk disempowers us.
• What led Akshay to become more conscious of his language.
• How our words shape our reality.
• When we give our pain voice, we give it more power.
• How all words are conceptual thoughts.

[01:11:20] The Reality of Polar Crossing

• Why Akshay's now on a mission to share his storm with others.
• What makes him want to go back to Antarctica.
• Why his goal was to spend 115 days on the polar mission.
• What he was eating while he was crossing Antarctica.

[01:16:10] Turn Your Pain to Your Purpose

• Why we often want to skip and bypass grief.
• How anxiety is demonized.
• Why Akshay doesn't like to sound like a war hero.
• The importance of turning our pain to purpose.

[01:19:45] Suffer Well

• How we project our unprocessed emotions.
• Why even therapists project their wounds onto their patients.
• How happiness is a side effect of pursuing a meaning.
• Why the people that are constantly struggling are living in the past.
• How we can learn to suffer well.
• Uncommon by Mark Divine
• How silence opens up a space for our inner dialogue.

[01:27:00] Stop The Noise

• Why many bootcamps miss the element of stillness and silence.
• How stillness is very uncomfortable at first.
• Why pausing is the key to training our awareness.

[01:31:25] Is Parenting A Spiritual Task?

• Why Akshay's now focusing on his financial wellness.
• What makes him feel that raising children is terrifying.
• Why being a parent is a spiritual experience.
• How Josh knows children choose us as parents.
• Why children bring us wisdom.
• How being a father makes men into leaders.

[01:38:10] Find Beauty in Suffering

• How judgment comes from resentment or jealousy.
• Fearvana Instagram
• Why fear and nirvana are not opposite but complementary.
• Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
• How finding beauty in suffering makes life more joyful.

[01:43:15] Fear of Other People's Opinion

• Why Akshay doesn't feel directly affected by Indian culture.
• How he feared what people would think if he didn't make it through the expedition.
• Why other people's lens of reality doesn't change who we are.
• How Akshay only took a day off from walking Antarctica on day 50.

[01:47:30] Your Beliefs Hold You Hostage

• Why Josh wasn't able to start the podcast for 4 years because of his childhood conditioning.
• Inside Out (2015)
• Why all paths are a crossroad.
• We don't rise to the level of the desires that we want, we fall to the level of the struggle that we're willing to endure.
• How all the suffering Akshay went through was worth it.
• Why belief is built on the battlefield.
• We are not defined by our thoughts.
• How confidence is a result of an action, it's not the fuel for action.

[01:56:25] Connection with God

• Why Akshay didn't have a relationship with God when he was struggling with suicidal thoughts.
• When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner
• How he taps into gratitude and the essence of the human spirit.
• Hacksaw Ridge (2016)
• Why Akshay wants to help other people cross their own version of Antarctica.
• The One You Feed Podcast

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Power Quotes From The Show

What Creates All Suffering?

"On these voyages, out at the edge, you see two realities coexisting at once, which ultimately sheds the illusion that they are separate. The resisting or clinging to either side of any duality is what creates all suffering." - Akshay Nanavati

What Struggle Are You Willing to Endure?

"We as individuals, we will not rise to the level of the desires we want. We will fall to the level of the struggle we are willing to endure." - Akshay Nanavati

The Paradox of Oneness

"The paradox of oneness is the realization that all the opposites that encompass the human experience are not truly separate. They are interconnected and they are part of a greater whole. True peace and freedom are created through shedding the illusions of the conceptual mind that creates these divisions, seeing them as one, and embracing both sides as part of the greater whole." - Akshay Nanavati

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Links From Today's Show 

• Akshay Nanavati
• 606 Akshay Nanavati | How To Love Your Fear: The (REAL) Secret To Unlocking Your Pure Potential
• Fearvana by Akshay Nanavati
• 734 Kirk Parsley MD | Sleep As Medicine: How To Sleep Like Royalty + Stop Being Sick
• 612 Dr. Michael Gervais | Living An Authentic Life: How to STOP Worrying About What People Think of You
• Henry Worsley
• Man's Search for Meaning by Viktor Frankl
• 538 John Wineland | A New Masculine Paradigm: Leading With Love, Living Your Truth + Healing The World
• Uncommon by Mark Divine
• Fearvana Instagram
• Flow by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
• Inside Out (2015)
• When Bad Things Happen to Good People by Harold Kushner
• Hacksaw Ridge (2016)
• The One You Feed Podcast

 

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About Akshay Nanavati

Akshay Nanavati has overcome drug addiction, PTSD from fighting in Iraq with the Marines (where one of his jobs was to walk in front of vehicles to find bombs), depression, and alcoholism that pushed him to the brink of suicide.

Since then, by embracing his demons, he has built a global business, run many ultramarathons, spent 17 days in darkness and isolation, and spent 100 days alone dragging heavy sleds for over 1200 miles in the polar regions.

Despite 4 biological defects including a blood disorder that 2 doctors told him would kill him in boot camp, he is now a sponsored athlete and most recently he pushed his body to the brink of death, spending 60 days alone in Antarctica dragging a 420 sled for 500 miles on what has been called “the boldest Antarctic expedition in modern times.”

Combining his life experience with years of research in neuroscience, psychology, and spirituality, he wrote the book “Fearvana," about which the Dalai Lama said, “Fearvana inspires us to look beyond our own agonizing experiences and find the positive side of our lives.”

Now, Akshay travels the world sharing the wisdom he has unearthed from the most extreme depths of solitude and suffering. He is on a mission to help our human family explore the edges and fall in love with both play and suffering in order to create a life of greater meaning, joy, and fulfillment.

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