Legally Clueless
Legally Clueless is a weekly podcast by Kenyan media personality Adelle Onyango! Here, she documents her raw human journey as an evolving unapologetically African woman. It is also a space where Africans share stories from their lives; stories that teach, make us cry, make us laugh - real, authentic African stories. The #LegallyClueless hotline is +254768628790
info_outline
When Shame Turns Life Into a Performance | For Mannerless Women
01/22/2026
When Shame Turns Life Into a Performance | For Mannerless Women
What happens when shame quietly teaches you to perform instead of be? In this episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with Kenyan comedian, activist, and writer Justine Wanda for a deeply honest conversation about shame, identity, adoption, grief, and unlearning survival modes. Justine shares how growing up adopted shaped her sense of belonging, why humour became a shield, and how much of her early life, from school to university, was spent performing to avoid being questioned or exposed. She reflects on the slow breaking of that performance, and the relief that came with realising that everyone is carrying their own invisible struggles. This episode explores: How shame can turn your entire life into a performance Using humour as protection and survival Identity after adoption and loss Navigating grief, belonging, and chosen family Letting go of who you had to be to survive Learning to be seen without performing This is a conversation for women who have ever felt like they had to be funny, fine, or palatable to be accepted, and for anyone learning how to extend grace to themselves while becoming. If this episode resonates, share it with a mannerless woman who needs the reminder that her truth doesn’t need to be edited to be worthy. 🔗 Links & Resources Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Story submission form: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39823175
info_outline
The Loneliness After Boundaries | Mid Week Tease
01/20/2026
The Loneliness After Boundaries | Mid Week Tease
Setting boundaries is often framed as empowering and it is. But what we don’t talk about enough is what comes after. The quiet. The emotional exhaustion. The loneliness that settles in when you stop over-giving, over-explaining, and abandoning yourself for the comfort of others. In this Mid Week Tease episode, Adelle Onyango explores the rarely discussed emotional aftermath of boundaries, especially for women who have spent years being the strong one, the reliable one, the emotionally available one. This conversation is not about “how to set boundaries.” It’s about what it feels like to live with them. In this episode, we reflect on: Why setting boundaries can feel lonely before it feels freeing The emotional exhaustion that follows when your nervous system finally slows down How boundaries expose relationships built on access and emotional labour Grieving connections that couldn’t meet you at your new level Resisting the urge to undo your growth just to avoid discomfort Learning to sit with space long enough for healthier connections to form This episode is for anyone who set boundaries and wondered: “Why do I feel so tired?” “Why does it feel so quiet?” “Did I do something wrong?” You didn’t. You’re in transition. Join the Legally Clueless Africa community Newsletter: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39800435
info_outline
The Loneliness After Boundaries | Mid Week Tease
01/20/2026
The Loneliness After Boundaries | Mid Week Tease
Setting boundaries is often framed as empowering and it is. But what we don’t talk about enough is what comes after. The quiet. The emotional exhaustion. The loneliness that settles in when you stop over-giving, over-explaining, and abandoning yourself for the comfort of others. In this Mid Week Tease episode, Adelle Onyango explores the rarely discussed emotional aftermath of boundaries, especially for women who have spent years being the strong one, the reliable one, the emotionally available one. This conversation is not about “how to set boundaries.” It’s about what it feels like to live with them. In this episode, we reflect on: Why setting boundaries can feel lonely before it feels freeing The emotional exhaustion that follows when your nervous system finally slows down How boundaries expose relationships built on access and emotional labour Grieving connections that couldn’t meet you at your new level Resisting the urge to undo your growth just to avoid discomfort Learning to sit with space long enough for healthier connections to form This episode is for anyone who set boundaries and wondered: “Why do I feel so tired?” “Why does it feel so quiet?” “Did I do something wrong?” You didn’t. You’re in transition. Join the Legally Clueless Africa community Newsletter: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39800425
info_outline
Why I Chose to Be Childfree as a Kenyan Man PART 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 361
01/18/2026
Why I Chose to Be Childfree as a Kenyan Man PART 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 361
In Episode 361 of the Legally Clueless Podcast, we share Part 1 of William Genga’s story, a Kenyan man who made the decision to be childfree at a very young age and spent years defending that choice in a society that insists everyone must eventually become a parent. Born and raised in Kericho, William reflects on growing up parentified as the firstborn, constantly caring for younger relatives, and how those early experiences shaped his relationship with responsibility, autonomy, and choice. In this deeply honest episode, William opens up about: Why he decided he never wanted children, as early as primary school Being repeatedly told he was “too young” to know what he wanted Navigating sexual relationships while being firmly childfree Pregnancy scares and the emotional weight of reproductive responsibility The double standards around family planning for men versus women Doctors refusing to take his decision seriously How regret, accountability, and bodily autonomy intersect This episode explores childfree living in Kenya, reproductive choice, male responsibility, and the often unspoken emotional labour that comes with navigating intimacy when your life choices go against the norm. This is Part 1 of William’s story. In Part 2, he goes deeper into the consequences of these choices, family reactions, and the turning point that changed everything. 🔗 Connect with Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story anonymously: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39771990
info_outline
Becoming a Shame-Free Woman: Desire, Pleasure & Personal Liberation | For Mannerless Women
01/15/2026
Becoming a Shame-Free Woman: Desire, Pleasure & Personal Liberation | For Mannerless Women
In this episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with writer, filmmaker, and cultural commentator Abigail Arunga for an expansive, deeply honest conversation about shame, desire, pleasure, and what it truly means to arrive as a liberated woman. Together, they explore how women are socialised to shrink themselves, emotionally, physically, sensually and what it takes to begin unlearning that conditioning. From confronting internalised shame to reclaiming pleasure, body autonomy, and self-trust, this episode invites listeners to reflect on their own relationship with desire and personal freedom. This conversation also weaves in: Why pleasure is often framed as “frivolous” for women How religion, culture, and colonial history shape sexual shame The difference between sexuality, sensuality, and embodiment Why personal liberation is inseparable from collective freedom Learning to listen to your body without guilt or apology This episode is thoughtful, reflective, and empowering, a must-listen for women on a journey of self-knowledge, healing, and unapologetic self-expression. Listener discretion advised: Mature themes are discussed. Links & Community Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39739130
info_outline
Choosing A Life Others Didn’t Imagine For You: Being Childfree | Mid Week Tease
01/13/2026
Choosing A Life Others Didn’t Imagine For You: Being Childfree | Mid Week Tease
What does it mean to choose a life that doesn’t come with a ready-made script? In this episode of Mid Week Tease, we sit with the quiet, complex reality of being childfree, not as a debate, not as a defence, but as a lived truth. Inspired by Part Two of Hekaya’s story in Episode 360 of Legally Clueless, this conversation explores what it really means to opt out of motherhood in a world that assumes it is every woman’s destiny. We talk about the grief that can coexist with certainty, the identity work that begins when womanhood is no longer anchored to caregiving, and the ways relationships shift when your life doesn’t follow the expected path. This episode is for women who: Are childfree by choice and navigating misunderstanding or pressure Are questioning the assumption that motherhood is inevitable Have grieved imagined futures without regretting their real lives Are redefining legacy, care, and belonging beyond parenting This is not an episode about convincing anyone. It’s an episode about witnessing and reminding you that you are not incomplete for choosing differently. In this episode, we explore: Choosing to be childfree in a culture that assumes motherhood Why grief doesn’t mean regret Untangling womanhood from motherhood The myth that childfree women live “carefree” lives How friendships, dating, and family dynamics change Building chosen family and alternative forms of legacy 🎧 New Mid Week Tease episodes drop weekly. 🔗 Stay Connected with Legally Clueless Africa Join our newsletter community: Follow us on Instagram: Find us on TikTok: Watch full episodes on YouTube: Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39717375
info_outline
Family, Shame, and Becoming Yourself Part 2 | Legally Clueless Ep360
01/11/2026
Family, Shame, and Becoming Yourself Part 2 | Legally Clueless Ep360
In Part Two of Hekaya’s story, the conversation deepens into reproductive choice, healing, and what it means to consciously choose a childfree life. Hekaya reflects on getting pregnant while in university, choosing to terminate the pregnancy, and navigating the experience largely in silence. She speaks candidly about relief, guilt, and the shame that followed and how she continued with life before she had the language or space to process what had happened. This episode also explores Hekaya's journey toward identifying as childfree, not as a reaction, not as fear, but as clarity. She unpacks the societal pressure placed on women to justify not wanting children, the erasure of women’s identities within motherhood, and why choosing not to have children can be a deeply intentional and loving decision. Hekaya shares how healing came later through slowing down, therapy, inner work, unlearning religious conditioning, reconnecting with her body, and finding community that allowed her to feel seen and understood. This is a conversation about choice, autonomy, and trusting yourself, even when your decisions are misunderstood. If you’ve ever questioned whether your desires are “valid enough,” felt silenced around reproductive choice, or needed permission to define fulfillment on your own terms, this episode is for you. KEY THEMES Reproductive choice and bodily autonomy Terminating a pregnancy and navigating shame Being childfree vs childless Identity, motherhood, and self-preservation Healing after trauma and delayed processing Therapy, inner work, and unlearning conditioning Choosing community and chosen family THIS EPISODE IS FOR YOU IF: You’ve felt pressure to want motherhood You’ve made reproductive choices in silence You’re childfree or questioning motherhood You’re doing the work of healing and self-understanding You want stories that center women’s agency without judgment JOIN THE LEGALLY CLUELESS COMMUNITY: 🌍 Newsletter: 📸 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: 📺 YouTube: ✍🏾 Share Your Story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 If this episode resonated, please share it with someone who might need to hear it, and leave us a review, it helps more African women find stories that remind them they are not alone. Your body. Your life. Your choice.
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39688470
info_outline
Same Home, Different Childhoods: Sibling Dynamics | Mid Week Tease
01/07/2026
Same Home, Different Childhoods: Sibling Dynamics | Mid Week Tease
What happens when siblings grow up under the same roof, but carry very different emotional experiences into adulthood? In this Mid Week Tease episode, inspired by Hekaya’s story on the Legally Clueless podcast, we explore the quiet complexity of sibling dynamics, birth order roles, comparison, and emotional safety within families. Many of us were raised believing that shared parents automatically meant shared childhoods. But psychology tells a different story. Drawing from the work of trauma-informed physician Gabor Maté and psychologist Alfred Adler, this episode gently unpacks why siblings can experience the same household in entirely different ways and why naming your truth doesn’t make you disloyal or ungrateful. In this episode, we explore: Why siblings raised in the same home often have different emotional realities How birth order and invisible family roles shape adult identity The long-term impact of sibling comparison and quiet competition What it means when siblings aren’t emotionally safe How to honor your experience without villainizing your family This episode isn’t about blame. It’s about permission, to tell the truth, to protect your inner world, and to understand yourself with more compassion. If you’ve ever felt unseen, misunderstood, or conflicted about your sibling relationships, this conversation is for you. Listen & Connect with Legally Clueless Africa 🌍 Join our community & sign up for the newsletter: 📸 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 📝 Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39648090
info_outline
Family, Shame, and Becoming Yourself | Legally Clueless Ep359 Part 1
01/04/2026
Family, Shame, and Becoming Yourself | Legally Clueless Ep359 Part 1
In this first episode of 2026, we open the year with Part One of Hekaya’s story, a deeply reflective and honest conversation about family, identity, and the long road toward becoming yourself. Hekaya shares what it was like growing up as the last born in a family where expectations, religion, and control shaped how safe she felt to express who she truly was. She reflects on sibling dynamics, loneliness within family systems, creativity as a lifeline, and the subtle ways shame can be inherited and internalised. This episode lays the emotional foundation for a larger story, one that also touches on Hekaya's experience with terminating a pregnancy, the guilt that followed, and her journey toward healing and self-compassion. That part of her story continues in Part Two, which will be released next week. This is a conversation about understanding yourself beyond the roles you were assigned, and about recognising that even siblings raised in the same home can experience entirely different childhoods. If you’ve ever questioned your place within your family, felt unseen by those closest to you, or found safety in chosen family instead, this episode is for you. KEY THEMES Sibling relationships and emotional safety Birth order and identity formation Family expectations vs self-expression Creativity as survival and self-definition Shame, religion, and control in African households Beginning the journey toward healing COMING NEXT 🔔 Part Two of Hekaya’s story drops next week, where she speaks more deeply about reproductive choice, guilt, healing, and reclaiming her voice. JOIN THE LEGALLY CLUELESS COMMUNITY 🌍 Newsletter: 📸 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: 📺 YouTube: ✍🏾 Share Your Story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 If this episode resonated, please share it with someone who might need it, leave us a review, and come back next week for Part Two. You are not alone and your healing matters.
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39605525
info_outline
Surviving An Abusive Relationship Part 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 358
12/28/2025
Surviving An Abusive Relationship Part 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 358
In episode 358 of the Legally Clueless Podcast, Victoria shares Part 2 of her story, a powerful journey of leaving an unsafe marriage, rebuilding life as a single mother, navigating fear and displacement, and eventually experiencing deep love and devastating loss. Picking up from childhood trauma and survival patterns explored in Part 1, this episode focuses on healing, agency, community support, and what it means to choose life after years of endurance. In this episode, we explore: Leaving an unsafe marriage with children Rebuilding life from scratch during COVID Community support and dignity-centered help Navigating co-parenting and safety fears Finding love after trauma Grief, loss, and continuing to live fully Victoria’s story is a reminder that healing is not about perfection, it’s about persistence, courage, and choosing yourself again and again. Listen to Part 2 now. Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 Join the Legally Clueless Africa community: Newsletter: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39546020
info_outline
This Year Asked A Lot Of You: A Gentle Closing Before The New Year | Mid Week Tease
12/24/2025
This Year Asked A Lot Of You: A Gentle Closing Before The New Year | Mid Week Tease
As the year comes to a close, there’s often pressure to reflect, reframe, and rush into hope. This final episode of Mid Week Tease offers something different: a pause. In this episode, Adelle invites you into a soft, honest moment of witnessing, not to extract lessons or tidy the year up neatly, but to honor what the year truly held. This is a conversation for anyone who feels emotionally tired, quietly proud of surviving, or unsure how to carry this year forward. In this episode, we explore: When the year didn’t turn out the way you expected and why that doesn’t mean it failed The invisible things you survived without recognition Relationships you outgrew or quietly grieved Releasing versions of yourself that could no longer keep up Fatigue that comes from carrying too much, not from laziness The episode closes with a gentle reflective ritual no homework, no fixing, just presence: Three things you’re laying down One thing you’re proud of surviving One truth you’re carrying forward This is not a wrap-up. It’s a deep exhale. Listen when you need permission to pause before moving on. Join the Legally Clueless Africa Community If you’d like to stay connected, share your story, or explore more conversations like this, here’s where to find us: ✉️ Newsletter: 📸 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 📝 Share Your Story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39509805
info_outline
Surviving An Abusive Relationship Part 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 357
12/21/2025
Surviving An Abusive Relationship Part 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 357
In Episode 357 of the Legally Clueless Podcast, Victoria shares part one of her powerful life story, growing up away from her mother, navigating multiple homes and boarding schools, and learning independence at a very young age. From her childhood in Nyeri, Karatina, and Garissa to her school years and early adulthood, Victoria reflects on how emotional absence, instability, and silence shaped her sense of belonging and connection. In this episode, we explore: • Growing up separated from primary caregivers • Childhood loneliness and emotional neglect • Boarding school experiences at a young age • How early instability shapes adult survival patterns • The quiet ways trauma takes root Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 Join the Legally Clueless Africa community: Newsletter: www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica YouTube: www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39487285
info_outline
From Suitcase to Store: Zia on Building a Fashion Brand, Trusting Instinct & Doing It Afraid | For Mannerless Women
12/18/2025
From Suitcase to Store: Zia on Building a Fashion Brand, Trusting Instinct & Doing It Afraid | For Mannerless Women
What does it really take to build a sustainable fashion brand in Kenya, without overnight success, investor hype, or a perfect plan? In this episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with Zia Nyamari, fashion entrepreneur and founder & creative director of Zia Africa, for an honest conversation about building a business from the ground up, fear, faith, intuition and all. Zia takes us back to her very first business idea at 10 years old (selling popcorn on the street), through years of importing clothes in suitcases, quitting employment, navigating family pressure, and eventually opening a flagship store at Village Market. She shares the behind-the-scenes realities of growth, the fear of dead stock, imposter syndrome, and why consistency matters more than speed. This episode is especially for women who are: Thinking about starting a business Growing slowly and wondering if they’re “behind” Learning to trust their intuition alongside logic Navigating fear, faith, and self-belief In this episode, we talk about: Starting a business with what you have Why growth is rarely overnight The fear of dead stock and financial risk Quitting employment to bet on yourself Consistency as a business strategy Trusting intuition and feminine leadership Sustainability and slow fashion Affirmations, faith, and doing things afraid ZIA’s reminder is simple but powerful: “Believe in your idea so much it has no choice but to materialize.” 🔗 Connect with Zia Africa @nandigirl_ on instagram @zianyamari on TikTok @ziafrica on both IG & TikTok website: www.ziaafrica.com. Physical location: Village Market, New Wing, 1st floor. 🔗 More from Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 If this episode resonates, share it with a mannerless (or almost mannerless) woman in your life and don’t forget to follow or subscribe so you never miss a new episode.
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39451945
info_outline
When Your Light Makes People Uncomfortable: How to Stop Dimming Yourself in Relationships | Mid Week Tease
12/17/2025
When Your Light Makes People Uncomfortable: How to Stop Dimming Yourself in Relationships | Mid Week Tease
What happens when your growth starts to shift your relationships? In this episode of Mid Week Tease, Adelle Onyango explores the quiet, often painful realization that not everyone in your life knows how to sit with your light. This episode unpacks how dimming yourself can show up subtly, why some relationships struggle when you expand, and how to let go without bitterness, blame, or drama. It’s a reminder that you don’t need to make yourself smaller to belong and that release can be an act of self-respect. In this episode, we explore: Why personal growth can make some people uncomfortable The subtle ways we dim our joy, confidence, and presence How to recognize relationships that require self-erasure Letting go without villainizing people you outgrow Grieving relationships that can’t meet you where you are Choosing yourself without guilt 🔗 Stay Connected with Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39437660
info_outline
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming PART 3 | Legally Clueless Ep 356
12/14/2025
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming PART 3 | Legally Clueless Ep 356
In this final episode of Gachambi’s three-part story on Legally Clueless, we sit with the quiet, life-altering chapters that come after survival, grief, sobriety, faith, and the ongoing work of becoming. After being admitted to the bar in November 2023, Gachambi reflects on navigating unemployment, rebuilding her legal career at her own pace, and confronting the reality that being without work is often a systemic failure, not a personal one Gachambi 3. But the heart of this episode lies in the personal. She speaks openly about grief, losing her father, realising years later what “life without dad” truly means, and learning that grief does not have a timeline. Instead of trying to heal “correctly,” she chooses to honour her father by living fully and truthfully Gachambi 3. Gachambi also shares her sobriety journey, quitting alcohol in 2022 after years of heavy drinking, alcohol-induced health issues, and emotional numbing. She reflects on the clarity, discipline, and emotional presence sobriety brought into her life, and why choosing to be sober became one of the most life-affirming decisions she’s ever made. This episode is a powerful reminder that: Grief doesn’t end, it changes shape Sobriety is about choosing presence, not punishment You’re allowed to reinvent yourself at your own pace Your best version is still ahead of you Faith, community, and self-honesty can carry you through seasons that feel unbearable If you are grieving a loved one, rebuilding your life, questioning your relationship with alcohol, or learning how to live again after loss, this story will meet you gently. Plug into the Legally Clueless Africa ecosystem Newsletter: Submit your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 Instagram: TikTok: YouTube (For Mannerless Women):
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39399670
info_outline
The Truth About Vaginas: Dr. Sule Breaks Down Myths, Safety & Intimate Wellness | For Mannerless Women
12/11/2025
The Truth About Vaginas: Dr. Sule Breaks Down Myths, Safety & Intimate Wellness | For Mannerless Women
In this fearless and deeply educational episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle sits down with Dr. Kristina Sule, one of only two cosmetic gynecologists in Kenya, for a groundbreaking conversation on vaginal health, vulva education, harmful practices, and what intimate wellness truly means for women at every age. Together, they unpack topics we were never taught, including: The difference between the vulva and the vagina How millions of nerves make the clitoris one of the most sensitive organs in the body Why the vagina is a self-cleansing organ What’s actually “normal” when it comes to vulva appearance Harmful Practices & Dangerous Myths Dr. Sule breaks down the real risks behind: Vaginal steaming “Vajacials” Yoni pearls, oils, sweets & inserts DIY lightening creams … and how some contain substances potent enough to cause vaginal cancer. Safe Alternatives & The Science of Cosmetic Gynecology We explore medically sound options for: Tightness Lubrication Dryness after childbirth or menopause Aesthetic concerns Intimate wellness across life stages (including her clients in their 80s!) What Intimate Wellness Really Means “It’s when your intimate life is pain-free, comfortable, confident, and enjoyable — not mechanical.” This episode empowers women to: Understand their anatomy Seek help safely Let go of shame Exercise agency over their bodies Know what to look for when choosing a licensed provider You deserve the absolute best reproductive and intimate health. 🔗 Legally Clueless Africa Links Newsletter: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Submit your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39366595
info_outline
You Don’t Need a New You in January: A Kinder Way to Start the Year | Mid Week Tease
12/09/2025
You Don’t Need a New You in January: A Kinder Way to Start the Year | Mid Week Tease
As the year comes to a close, the pressure to reinvent ourselves starts to rise. “New year, new me” culture tells us we must transform, overhaul our habits, set 20 resolutions, and show up in January as a completely new woman. But what if you don’t have to? In this Mid Week Tease episode, Adelle Onyango offers a soothing, truth-filled conversation about stepping into the new year gently, without burnout, shame, or the pressure to rebuild yourself from scratch. We explore: Why January reinvention culture creates unnecessary pressure How the self-improvement industry profits from women feeling “not enough” What gentler, more realistic growth models look like Why healing and change don’t follow calendar timelines How to honour the version of you that carried you through this year Soft, sustainable shifts you can embrace instead of drastic reinventions This episode is for anyone feeling exhausted, uncertain, reflective, or overwhelmed by “new year expectations.” You deserve a beginning that feels kind, not punishing. Listen to more from the Legally Clueless Africa network: Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39342470
info_outline
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming PART 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 354
12/07/2025
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming PART 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 354
In this episode of Legally Clueless, Adelle shares Part 2 of Gachambi’s powerful and deeply honest story, a testimony of resilience through toxic workplaces, repeated exam failures, sexual harassment in the legal world, and the long, winding road toward becoming an advocate of the High Court of Kenya. After passing only four out of nine bar exams, Gachambi faced disappointment, self-doubt, and the pressure to keep going when giving up felt easier. She takes us through the emotional weight of resitting exams over two years, the inner dialogue of remembering “the smart girl she once was,” and the moment she finally passed her final papers in 2023. But her academic journey was only part of the story. In this episode she also opens up about: • Surviving toxic legal workplaces that drained her mentally and physically • Sexual harassment from seniors in the profession — and the silence surrounding it • Being fired just weeks before her admission to the bar • Navigating unemployment, anxiety, and the pressure to “have it all figured out” • Rediscovering her purpose through humanitarian law and volunteering • The role faith plays in her rebuilding This episode is a raw reflection on what it means to survive workplaces that weren’t built to protect you, how failure can become a teacher, and how purpose sometimes reveals itself in the ashes of what fell apart. If you’re in a season of career confusion, burnout, or feeling unseen in your workplace, this story will hold you gently. Plug into the Legally Clueless Africa community: Newsletter signup: Story submission: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 Instagram: TikTok: YouTube (For Mannerless Women):
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39312845
info_outline
Why Friendships End: Kui Mwai on Boundaries, Loneliness & the Truth About Adult Connections | For Mannerless Women
12/04/2025
Why Friendships End: Kui Mwai on Boundaries, Loneliness & the Truth About Adult Connections | For Mannerless Women
Journalist and writer Kui Mwai joins Adelle for an unfiltered, deeply relatable conversation on adult friendships: why they end, how they evolve, and what it means to outgrow people you still love. In this episode, they unpack: ✨ Why Kui revisited four former friendships for her viral Vogue article ✨ What really happens during friendship fallouts, guilt, anxiety, disappointment ✨ Why adult friendship feels so different from school-era connection ✨ The loneliness and emotional risk of solitude ✨ Navigating boundaries in a culture that isn’t always taught them ✨ The pain of friendships that “fizzle” with no explanation ✨ How to rebuild connection without losing yourself ✨ Why friendship seasons are normal and nothing is wrong with you Kui also opens up about her writing journey, her upcoming novel, and what solitude taught her about inner strength. If you’ve ever questioned your friendships or felt guilty for choosing yourself, this episode will feel like a warm exhale. LINKS Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39265590
info_outline
When Joy Feels Out of Reach: Navigating Burnout, Numbness & Seasonal Pressure | Mid Week Tease
12/03/2025
When Joy Feels Out of Reach: Navigating Burnout, Numbness & Seasonal Pressure | Mid Week Tease
This week on the Mid Week Tease, Adelle opens up a gentle, grounding conversation for anyone who feels emotionally out of sync with a season that demands joy. If you're navigating burnout, numbness, sadness, or simply feel “flat” during the holidays, this episode offers validation, psychology-backed insights, and practical tools to help you honour your emotional truth. We explore why joy sometimes feels far away, from allostatic load and emotional blunting to comparison culture and end-year fatigue and how to give yourself permission to feel exactly how you feel. Adelle also shares personal reflections and science-supported exercises to help you reconnect with yourself in soft, realistic ways. Whether you're overwhelmed, exhausted, or just not in a festive mood, this episode reminds you that you’re not broken, not behind, and not alone. Your humanity is welcome here. In This Episode You’ll Learn: Why some people feel numb, low, or disconnected during the festive season How burnout and emotional overload affect your ability to feel joy The psychological roots of emotional flattening: allostatic load, emotional blunting & seasonal depression How societal pressure creates “performative joy” Personal reflections from Adelle on seasons when joy felt out of reach Science-backed practices to support you through this season: Name It To Tame It (neuroscience-backed emotion labeling) Micro-Joy Scan (positive psychology) A 30-second nervous system reset A CBT-inspired reframing for lowering unrealistic expectations A “permission slip” exercise to soothe internal shame Why joy eventually returns and how to create room for it gently Perfect For You If You’re Experiencing: End-of-year burnout Emotional numbness Seasonal depression Comparison-triggered shame Pressure to be joyful Low energy, anxiety, or overwhelm A desire for honest, soothing companionship Explore More from Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39248670
info_outline
When Joy Feels Out of Reach: Navigating Burnout, Numbness & Seasonal Pressure | Mid Week Tease
12/03/2025
When Joy Feels Out of Reach: Navigating Burnout, Numbness & Seasonal Pressure | Mid Week Tease
This week on the Mid Week Tease, Adelle opens up a gentle, grounding conversation for anyone who feels emotionally out of sync with a season that demands joy. If you're navigating burnout, numbness, sadness, or simply feel “flat” during the holidays, this episode offers validation, psychology-backed insights, and practical tools to help you honour your emotional truth. We explore why joy sometimes feels far away, from allostatic load and emotional blunting to comparison culture and end-year fatigue and how to give yourself permission to feel exactly how you feel. Adelle also shares personal reflections and science-supported exercises to help you reconnect with yourself in soft, realistic ways. Whether you're overwhelmed, exhausted, or just not in a festive mood, this episode reminds you that you’re not broken, not behind, and not alone. Your humanity is welcome here. In This Episode You’ll Learn: Why some people feel numb, low, or disconnected during the festive season How burnout and emotional overload affect your ability to feel joy The psychological roots of emotional flattening: allostatic load, emotional blunting & seasonal depression How societal pressure creates “performative joy” Personal reflections from Adelle on seasons when joy felt out of reach Science-backed practices to support you through this season: Name It To Tame It (neuroscience-backed emotion labeling) Micro-Joy Scan (positive psychology) A 30-second nervous system reset A CBT-inspired reframing for lowering unrealistic expectations A “permission slip” exercise to soothe internal shame Why joy eventually returns and how to create room for it gently Perfect For You If You’re Experiencing: End-of-year burnout Emotional numbness Seasonal depression Comparison-triggered shame Pressure to be joyful Low energy, anxiety, or overwhelm A desire for honest, soothing companionship Explore More from Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Share your story: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39248665
info_outline
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming | Legally Clueless Ep 354
12/01/2025
My Journey Through Grief, Bullying & Becoming | Legally Clueless Ep 354
In this week’s episode of Legally Clueless, Adelle shares Part 1 of Gachambi’s powerful story a deeply human journey through childhood displacement, bullying, grief, academic pressure, and the long road back to herself. Born and raised in Kasarani, Gachambi grew up a brilliant child… until post-election violence disrupted her life and forced a school change that altered everything. She opens up about being bullied in high school, navigating independence for the first time, discovering club culture in university, losing her father while in first year, and silently battling depression she didn’t have the language for. Through community, friendship, faith, and sheer resilience, she kept going even when she wasn’t sure she could. In Part 1, you’ll hear: Growing up between stability and sudden upheaval How bullying shaped her fear of physical harm The pressures of being a “smart girl” and eldest daughter Drinking, club life, and the escape it offered The unexpected loss of her father and her emotional shutdown How unprocessed grief followed her into adulthood The role of community in rebuilding her academic life The complicated balance of identity, expectations, and survival This story is an honest look at the messy, nonlinear path of becoming and the quiet battles many people carry. Listen, reflect, and share this episode with someone who needs to hear they’re not alone. Plug Into The Legally Clueless Africa Ecosystem WATCH: For Mannerless Women, raw conversations with African women rewriting the rules of womanhood. YouTube: LISTEN: The Midweek Tease grounding weekly reflections with Adelle. JOIN US: Sign up for our newsletter & submit your story: Newsletter signup: Story submission: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 FOLLOW: Instagram: TikTok:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39219475
info_outline
When You Feel Like You Didn’t Do Enough This Year | Mid Week Tease
11/25/2025
When You Feel Like You Didn’t Do Enough This Year | Mid Week Tease
This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle opens up a grounding, compassionate conversation for anyone ending the year with that heavy feeling of “I didn’t do enough.” If you’re wrestling with shame, comparison, or pressure to have a picture-perfect end-of-year story, this episode is your reminder that growth isn’t linear, timelines aren’t universal, and your quiet seasons matter too. Adelle explores: • Why end-year pressure amplifies shame and self-criticism • How unrealistic expectations shape our sense of “not enough” • The truth about nonlinear growth and “foundation years” • Gentle reframes that help you recognise the progress you actually made • A simple self-recognition practice to close the year with kindness • How to release comparison culture and return to your own pace It’s a soft landing spot in a season that can feel overwhelming and a needed reminder that your story doesn’t have to look like everyone else’s to be valid. LINKS Newsletter signup: Instagram: TikTok: YouTube: Story submission form: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39169565
info_outline
Preeclampsia, Pressure & Becoming PART 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 353
11/23/2025
Preeclampsia, Pressure & Becoming PART 2 | Legally Clueless Ep 353
Episode 353 continues the powerful journey of Ciru Karimi, whose pregnancy story took a terrifying turn after a sudden preeclampsia diagnosis at 26 weeks. In Part 2, she shares what happened after her emergency delivery, from the shock of seeing her premature son for the first time, to the emotional weight of the NICU, and the long path toward healing. In this episode, Ciru opens up about: • Delivering at 29 weeks after severe preeclampsia • The fear and numbness that followed her baby’s birth • Daily NICU visits, kangaroo care, and milk expression • The mental load of caring for a 1.2kg premature baby • Postpartum depression and the moment she realised she needed therapy • Navigating societal pressure to “have another child” • Her husband’s hidden emotional burden during the crisis • The long recovery, the second pregnancy, and finding the right doctor • Why preeclampsia awareness is urgently needed for African women • The need for more support systems for preemies and their parents This is a story about survival, motherhood, trauma, mental health, and the resilience it takes to keep going when society keeps demanding more. If you’ve experienced preeclampsia, premature birth, NICU life, postpartum depression, or pressure around motherhood, you are not alone. Ciru’s story holds space for so many women who’ve endured these journeys in silence. Join the Legally Clueless Africa community: Newsletter → Instagram → TikTok → YouTube → Submit your story → forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 #LegallyCluelessAfrica #PreeclampsiaStories #PrematureBirth #NICUJourney #AfricanMothers #PostpartumDepression #PregnancyComplications #MentalHealthAwareness #AdelleOnyango
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39141180
info_outline
Why You’re Not “Just Angry”: The Hidden Emotion Underneath | Mid Week Tease
11/19/2025
Why You’re Not “Just Angry”: The Hidden Emotion Underneath | Mid Week Tease
This week on the Midweek Tease, Adelle unpacks one of the most misunderstood emotional patterns: how fear often disguises itself as anger. Rooted in psychology and the lived experiences of African women, this episode explores why we react the way we do, what’s happening in the brain and nervous system, and how to understand the emotions hiding beneath anger. In this episode, you’ll learn: Why anger is often a secondary emotion How fear, shame, overwhelm, and hurt drive our reactions The “Fight Response” and what it means for your mental health How childhood, culture, trauma, and pressure shape our emotional patterns The four faces of anger and how they show up in relationships Simple psychology-backed tools to regulate anger with compassion How to identify what you really need in heated moments It’s a soft, grounding episode for anyone who has snapped, shut down, withdrawn, or felt overwhelmed and later wondered, “Where did that come from?” If this resonates, share it with another woman who needs permission to feel without shame. Connect With Legally Clueless Africa Newsletter signup: www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Instagram: www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ TikTok: www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica YouTube: www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube Share your story with us: forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 #MidweekTease #LegallyCluelessAfrica #EmotionalWellness #AfricanWomen #AngerManagement #FearResponse #HealingJourney #MentalHealthAwareness
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39091670
info_outline
Preeclampsia, Pressure & Becoming PART 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 352
11/16/2025
Preeclampsia, Pressure & Becoming PART 1 | Legally Clueless Ep 352
Episode 352 of the Legally Clueless Podcast features Part 1 of Ciru Karimi’s powerful story a deeply honest journey through childhood, societal expectations, studying abroad, navigating adulthood in Nairobi, and the frightening moment her first pregnancy takes an unexpected turn. In this episode, Ciru opens up about: • Growing up between Donholm and Westlands, and the identity shifts that came with it • Culture shocks in primary, high school, and university • The transition from campus to job-hunting in Kenya • Societal pressure on African women around marriage and children • How anxiety first showed up in her life • Her complicated pregnancy and preeclampsia diagnosis at 28 weeks • The emotional, physical, and mental toll of a high-risk pregnancy • Emergency delivery and the fear of navigating premature birth This episode is a must-listen for anyone interested in African women’s stories, preeclampsia experiences, pregnancy challenges, motherhood in Kenya, and the unseen emotional labour so many women carry. Next week, Part 2 continues Ciru’s journey as she shares what happened after her emergency delivery, life with a premature baby, and the resilience she didn’t know she had. Join the Legally Clueless Africa community: Sign up for our newsletter → IG → TikTok → YouTube → Submit your story → forms.gle/kMn7Wae5N563JFGQ8 #LegallyClueless #LegallyCluelessAfrica #AfricanPodcasts #PreeclampsiaStories #PregnancyJourneyKenya #WomenHealing #MotherhoodStoriesAfrica
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/39049795
info_outline
Redefining Ambition: From Hustle to Harmony | Mid Week Tease
11/11/2025
Redefining Ambition: From Hustle to Harmony | Mid Week Tease
As the year winds down, many of us are running on fumes, juggling deadlines, expectations, and the pressure to “finish strong.” But what if success didn’t have to come with exhaustion? What if ambition could feel soft, steady, and nourishing? This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle explores how to redefine ambition, moving away from hustle culture and into harmony. It’s a reflective conversation about ambition that honors wellness, rest, and purpose without guilt. In this episode, Adelle shares: - The myth of hustle culture and how it silently shapes our self-worth - How burnout has become an identity — and why that’s dangerous - What ambition looks like when you center peace instead of performance - Practical ways to build dreams that don’t drain you As we reach the end of the year, this is your reminder that you don’t need to prove your worth through exhaustion. You can still be ambitious and rested. Driven and grounded. Focused and free. Join the conversation: How are you redefining ambition for yourself this season? What does success feel like when peace becomes part of it? LINKS: ✨ Newsletter signup: 📱 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 📝 Story submission form:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/38995725
info_outline
Healing, Purpose & Her Grandmother’s Spirit | Legally Clueless Ep 351
11/09/2025
Healing, Purpose & Her Grandmother’s Spirit | Legally Clueless Ep 351
In this episode, we meet Nile Dawta, a reggae singer, songwriter, producer, and gender activist from Shauri Moyo. Her story is a moving journey through identity, purpose, and spiritual awakening. She shares how growing up next to Kamukunji Grounds shaped her activism, how she walked away from a stable job to follow her music, and how heartbreak, loss, and ancestral connection led her back to herself. This story beautifully reminds us that healing and creativity often flow from the same source: the ancestors who walk with us. Connect with Legally Clueless Africa: 🌍 📩 Sign up for our newsletter: 📱 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 🗣️ Share your story:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/38967435
info_outline
Healing, Purpose & Her Grandmother’s Spirit | Legally Clueless Ep 351
11/09/2025
Healing, Purpose & Her Grandmother’s Spirit | Legally Clueless Ep 351
In this episode, we meet Nile Dawta, a reggae singer, songwriter, producer, and gender activist from Shauri Moyo. Her story is a moving journey through identity, purpose, and spiritual awakening. She shares how growing up next to Kamukunji Grounds shaped her activism, how she walked away from a stable job to follow her music, and how heartbreak, loss, and ancestral connection led her back to herself. This story beautifully reminds us that healing and creativity often flow from the same source: the ancestors who walk with us. Connect with Legally Clueless Africa: 🌍 📩 Sign up for our newsletter: 📱 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 🗣️ Share your story:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/38967430
info_outline
When You Feel Behind in Life (You’re Not Late, You’re Right on Time) | Mid Week Tease
11/05/2025
When You Feel Behind in Life (You’re Not Late, You’re Right on Time) | Mid Week Tease
This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle unpacks a quiet but familiar feeling, that sense that everyone else is moving faster than you. You know it, the comparison, the “shoulds,” the sinking thought that maybe you’ve missed your moment. In this episode, Adelle explores timeline anxiety, how it shows up, why we experience it, and how to soften it with truth and self-compassion. In this episode, she shares: Why “life timelines” are myths we inherit, not truths we must follow How comparison culture disconnects us from our own rhythm Why growth isn’t linear, it loops, pauses, and redirects How to redefine success on your terms This is your reminder that healing, purpose, and success are not races they’re rhythms. And you can’t be behind on a path that’s uniquely yours. LINKS: ✨ Newsletter signup: 📱 Instagram: 🎵 TikTok: ▶️ YouTube: 📝 Story submission form:
/episode/index/show/legallyclueless/id/38927735