The Leadership Podcast

We interview great leaders, review the books they read, and speak with highly influential authors who study them.

TLP493: “Sand People” - The Hidden Drag on Your Team's Performance 01/07/2026

TLP493: “Sand People” - The Hidden Drag on Your Team's Performance Jim and Jan tackle the uncomfortable truth about "sand people," those team members who grind everything to a halt, and why even your best glue guy can't overcome the friction they create. Drawing from their coaching experience, Jim and Jan reveal how to identify and deal with sand people before they destroy your team. They explore the telltale signs—projecting, hoarding resources, passive-aggressive behavior—and explain why leaders consistently wait too long to act. They also share the harsh truth that someone who is not performing well is costing more than they produce, and costing opportunities and damaging team morale in ways that are difficult to quantify. In this episode, you'll learn how sand people self-identify through their behavior, the specific ways they inhibit high performance, and most importantly, why it’s critical to move quickly.. Find episode 493 on The Leadership Podcast, YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [01:35] Jim coined the term "sand people" to describe team members who act as sand in the gears, preventing smooth team operation. [03:05] Jan noted that 60% of people in the U.S. are not in high-value jobs with only 31% engagement, creating a disconnect between economic growth and worker fulfillment. [05:12] Sand people often project by complaining about what others aren't doing, which is exactly what they themselves aren't doing. [07:34] Jan confirmed that one bad person on a team poisons everything, making it impossible to have a successful team experience. [12:33] A-players immediately avoid sand people and start looking for better teams because they expect leaders to uphold standards. [16:04] Jim witnessed Larry Yost pick up a cigarette butt when no one was watching, demonstrating how modeling behavior matters more than words. [19:17] Jan admitted being a sand person as a young cynical military officer, making wisecracks without anyone coaching her on the impact. [21:05] Jim acknowledged being too harsh early in his management career and emphasized the importance of learning from mistakes. [22:06] Jan's biggest business mistake was bragging about new hires then keeping them too long trying to fix them instead of recognizing sunk costs. [23:49] Jim advocated hiring for unteachable qualities like curiosity in salespeople rather than skills you can train. [26:34] Jan recommended "Top Grading" by Brad Smart for distinguishing between easy-to-change skills and hard-to-change qualities like energy and passion. [33:36] Leaders must be attracted to friction to identify where to remove resistance and lubricate the machine for team effectiveness. [29:57] Jan identified two coaching buckets: helping people prioritize time strategically and having difficult conversations about performance expectations. [33:21] And remember… “The path of least resistance is the path of the loser.” - H. G. Well Quotable Quotes "If getting rid of people is easy for you and you don't lose sleep over it, you're probably a sociopath." "The day it gets easy for you is the day you've kind of lost your soul." - "We've got to have good friction. Friction that produces traction, not friction that produces drag." "Your culture becomes the worst behavior you tolerate." "One bad person, even if they're a little bad, is way more powerful than the best person for a team." "Look for work, look for things to do, and give more than you take." - "Sand people are limiting your culture. They are in effect a toleration of sub optimal performance of weakness." "If we pay people that aren't getting the job done, then they're either a charity case or they are a thief." "As a leader, I think we need to be attracted to friction." "People are not fine wine." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Jan Rutherford LinkedIn | Jan Rutherford X | Jim Vaselopulos LinkedIn | Jim Vaselopulos xX | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39638840

TLP492: Stop Fitting In with Jinky Panganiban 12/31/2025

TLP492: Stop Fitting In with Jinky Panganiban Jinky Panganiban serves as Professor of Practice at the University of Oregon's Sports Product Management Program, founder of 1969Blue Consulting, and founding member of Oregon Sports Angels. She is a former Vice President and General Manager at Nike with over 20 years of global executive experience. She led multibillion-dollar businesses across Asia Pacific, North America, Latin America, and Europe. In this episode, Jinky reveals why "fitting in" kills leadership potential and how your cultural background becomes your superpower in global business. Jinky explains how the sports product industry has built intentional leadership development by translating a shared mission to fit local cultures instead of forcing one uniform way while maintaining a unified mission. She addresses the volatile state of global trade by emphasizing curiosity and critical thinking as essential skills for the next generation. Jinky argues that despite rising nationalism and tariff threats, consumers are already voting for a borderless world through their digital behavior and content consumption. In this episode, you'll discover how to leverage your cultural background as a superpower, build high-performing global teams, and lead with authenticity in an increasingly connected world. Find The Leadership Podcast episode 492 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Jinky Panganiban on Stop Fitting In Key Takeaways [04:09] Jinky describes how she started at Nike through a blind ad in Manila and was handpicked to help build Southeast Asia operations. [06:26] Jinky reveals how three white male mentors helped her realize her cultural background was her superpower. [09:47] Jinky explains that great leadership starts with being—knowing who you are and what you stand for—not just the doing of checking off deliverables and performance goals. [12:51] Jinky distinguishes influence from selling. [13:42] Jinky describes how SPM deliberately keeps students in the same project teams for 18 months because leadership is formed in the messy middle when deadlines are tight and not everybody agrees. [17:12] Jinky explains the collective industry commitment to raising next-generation leaders who will progress the culture. [20:32] Jinky demonstrates how global brands must translate their message locally. [25:17] Jinky shares how mentor Kate Delhagen gave her courage to leave corporate and explore angel investing. [28:58] Jinky describes her current advisory work with startup brands where she's both business advisor and biggest cheerleader, modeling what Kate did for her. [31:04] Jinky argues that despite borders and tariffs, the next generation of consumers already thinks globally through social media and digital platforms, celebrating differences rather than fearing them. [34:09] Jinky emphasizes that curiosity combined with critical thinking—vetting sources and asking why—is essential for navigating today's information-saturated world. [37:26] Jinky encourages everyone to celebrate where they've come from because there's only one of you, and you can't be more original than that—your background is your competitive advantage. [ ] And remember… "To be one, to be united, is a great thing, but to respect the right to be different is maybe even greater." – Bono Quotable Quotes "There's only one of you, so you can't be more original than that." "My cultural background and where I came from and all of my lived experience actually isn't something that I should shy away from or even be embarrassed about, but actually use it to my advantage and actually leverage it." "Great leadership starts with being. It's knowing who you are, what you stand for, and how you show up, especially when no one's watching." "We believe that leadership is formed in the messy middle. You know, when the deadlines are tight, the tempers are like rising and then not everybody's agreeing, but then you still have a deadline to hit." "Global doesn't mean uniform. The best teams share common purpose but express it in ways that feel very local." "Even if we put borders around things, the consumers will vote anyway to go beyond borders. Ideas, innovation, their talent, creativity, I don't think it carries a passport." "Human leadership never goes out of style." "Learn to lead yourself first. Build credibility, make sure that you practice empathy, and then lead through action and not titles." "If you don't know how to work in teams, you cannot work in the industry." "It's not so much exporting the culture, it's about translating it so that it works for everybody." "Cultural intelligence or cultural fluency is really critical because I've seen how that has become the one skill that could bridge global teams and communicate even beyond language." "Making sure that you find sources that are credible. Not just take things face value. Critical thinking is also something that's really important to ask the question why." "Culture, whether that's country culture or community culture, it's something to leverage, and it could always be a superpower for you." "We want to make sure that we leave this place better than we found it." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Jinky Panganiban LinkedIn | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39437500

TLP491: Letting Go of Old Frameworks with Jack Swift 12/24/2025

TLP491: Letting Go of Old Frameworks with Jack Swift Jack Swift is a West Point graduate, former CEO of TIFIN and Liminal Collective, and co-founder of Pacific Current Group and Sangha. He now advises frontier AI ventures, including Vantage Discovery (sold to Shopify), Brightwave, and Grid Aero, and co-founded Sangha, a community for conscious leadership. In this episode, Jack explains why the biggest threat to your organization isn’t outside pressure. It’s your need to be right. He shows why old leadership habits—command and control, chasing quarterly targets, and relying only on past wins—no longer work. He offers a different approach built on deep listening, less ego, and faster instincts. Jack talks about the blind spots he sees on boards, from big companies ignoring rapid change to startups burning cash to prove a point. He also shares how to spot the moment when governance stops supporting durability and starts blocking innovation—and what to do before bureaucracy kills your edge. Listen to this episode to learn how to drop old frameworks, trust your gut, and build a learning culture that works with AI instead of fighting it. Find The Leadership Podcast episode 490 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:28] Jack shares that stopping drinking a few years ago has been "incredibly clarifying" for his decision making and presence as a leader. [05:19] Jack shares how his perspective on leadership has evolved from military to entrepreneurship to board service. [10:11] Jack emphasizes three critical elements that make an effective independent board director: maintaining independence to evaluate organizational health, stepping into conflict early, and the ability to "look around corners" and anticipate future disruption. [15:07] Jack identifies the biggest blind spot for larger companies and the biggest blind spot for early-stage companies and founders. [19:26] Jack reflects on how his experiences as an entrepreneur shaped how he evaluates opportunities and risks. [21:48] Jack reflects on something 18 years ago that helped him learn without screwing up. [23:00] Jack discusses the role of ego versus intuition in leadership. [25:34] Jack defines governance in highly regulated industries like insurance and financial services versus the AI space. [29:56] Jack agrees AI works best in regulated spaces because "machine based learning and models work really well in systems, rules based systems" where regulatory review "may have taken humans six months to do, it can be done in like six minutes." [33:16] Jack describes how Boulder's ecosystem has influenced his approach to leadership and growth. [36:35] Jack advises traditional industry leaders to "let go of old frameworks" and "be open to how it might be done" because entrenched industries are "specifically ripe for innovation and disruption." [37:36] Jack says one piece of advice for leaders navigating uncertainty today. He explains why whole-body listening matters for the future of leadership. [41:19] And remember...“I know of no more encouraging fact than the unquestionable ability of man to elevate his life by conscious endeavor.” - Henry David Thoreau Quotable Quotes "Leaders make decisions and they look for and create alignment within an organization." "The need to be right is the biggest blind spot. Taking the position that I want to be right, I'm gonna burn capital to show the world that I'm right is a very risky way to go about your business." "I made a lot of mistakes. I screwed a lot of things up. Sometimes because I didn't know any better, sometimes because I let my ego make decisions, and sometimes because I was relying on old frameworks that just wouldn't work anymore." "Your go mind shouldn't always drive the car. Sometimes you need to put instinct in the driver's seat and let your brain be the passenger." "Let go of old frameworks. Don't think you know better. Work on self awareness, work on your personal growth edges. Better at you is better at what you do." "Listen with your whole body. Your body knows—that's your gut, your instinct, your intuition. The faster you can listen, receive, and act, the faster you'll be able to go." "Human beings are the only species that can imagine infinite future potentials and bring them into reality. That creative capability is uniquely human and incredibly special." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Jack Swift Website | Jack Swift LinkedIn | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39288895

TLP490: Reinventing Candy and Culture with Katie Lefkowitz 12/17/2025

TLP490: Reinventing Candy and Culture with Katie Lefkowitz Katie Lefkowitz is a neuroscience-trained entrepreneur and the founder and CEO of Harken Foods who's reinventing candy with gut health at its core. In this episode, Katie reveals how her neuroscience background taught her to demand feedback systematically and observe behavior over words—skills that proved universal across consulting, scaling, and founding companies. She shares why she chose measured growth at Harken after experiencing Caulipower's explosive trajectory. Katie explains how the "seven questions framework" helps teams navigate the market’s rapid shifts by keeping core values fixed while pivoting operational tactics. Discover practical approaches to data-driven decision-making, building authentic workplace culture, and leading through uncertainty without losing sight of core values. Find The Leadership Podcast episode 490 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:03] Katie explains her neuroscience background taught her the scientific method, helping evaluate questions less emotionally and with reduced bias. [04:05] Katie describes how all decisions need to be based in data, seeking feedback from every person on the Harken team. [05:44] Katie shares Harken was created after a health scare related to colon cancer introduced her to food as medicine. [07:25] Katie explains Caulipower grew as the fastest growing brand in all of CPG, but for Harken she wants to be more measured. [09:03] Katie confirms the Caulipower success gave her confidence to go at it alone with Harken. [09:48] Katie reflects on trying to be what she thought a leader looked like, being insecure about her age and gender. [11:45] Katie explains there will always be some imposter syndrome, but having Harken within her control has helped relieve that feeling. [13:20] Katie recalls a pitch where the first person said her product doesn't taste good, leaving her crying in the cab to the airport. [15:25] Katie describes watching if people take a second bite during tastings because behavior tells more than words. [16:36] Katie emphasizes listening more than talking as the key leadership lesson. [17:29] Katie explains the company uses Southwest Airlines' seven questions framework where core values don't change but goals and focus do. [19:05] Katie notes that running decisions through core values becomes second nature and prevents losing time on wrong priorities. [20:18] Katie states at their early stage it's about hiring people who believe in what they're doing because culture is what happens when she's not in the room. [21:44] Katie explains parents understand prioritization better because anything to get more time with their kid is of high value. [23:40] Katie reflects that taking pauses to pick up her kid allows her to process things better and make better decisions. [24:46] Katie advises knowing what motivates you—autonomy, mastery, purpose or status, wealth, power—and making decisions based on who you actually are. [27:41] And remember... "If there is no struggle, there is no progress." – Frederick Douglass Quotable Quotes "If you're not telling me I'm doing something wrong or questioning what I'm doing, very frequently, I'm gonna have a problem with that because there's no way that I'm doing everything right." "Listen more than you talk. You will always get a lot more from really hearing people than you're ever going to get from talking at them." "When you're just yourself, it actually comes off much more authentic. And it's those relationships that you're holding yourself back from if you're not able to be your full self." "Have confidence in yourself, own who you are. And it'll actually take you much further than trying to fit into some old mold." "All decisions just need to be based in data and not necessarily, you know, stories." "It's about keeping your core values and making sure that runs through every decision that you're making." "My time is my most valuable resource, not only to myself personally, but to the company." "Taking that pause actually allows me to process things much better. And having that breathing room, I think I just make better decisions." "Know what motivates you... Not who you want people to think you are, but who you actually are." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Katie Lefkowitz Website | Katie Lefkowitz Facebook | Katie Lefkowitz LinkedIn | Katie Lefkowitz Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39288880

TLP489: Quitting – Knowing When to Walk Away 12/10/2025

TLP489: Quitting – Knowing When to Walk Away Annie Duke is a three-time bestselling author, decision strategist, and former professional poker champion. She holds a PhD in cognitive psychology and is co-founder of the Alliance for Decision Education. Annie's latest best-selling book is “Quit: The Power of Knowing When to Walk Away.” In this episode, Annie reveals why knowing when to walk away is the most underrated leadership skill. Drawing on cognitive psychology and real-world coaching with executives and venture capitalists, she breaks down why we're wired to stick with bad decisions, and more importantly, how to override that wiring. Annie explains how sunk costs, identity attachment, and status quo bias conspire to keep us committed past the point of reason. Listen now to stop grinding on goals that don't serve you, and start quitting your way to better outcomes. Find The Leadership Podcast episode 489 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Annie Duke on Quitting – Knowing When to Walk Away Key Takeaways [02:01] Annie reveals she's an avid tennis player and has a Bernadoodle dog not mentioned in her public bio. [02:54] Annie explains quitting is central to success because decisions are made under uncertainty and even perfect choices have bad outcomes 20% of the time. [06:25] Annie discusses how over-optimism harms decision-making by overestimating both likelihood and quality of good outcomes. [09:41] Annie describes Don Moore's research showing optimistic people just spend more time on unsolvable problems without performing better. [11:44] Annie clarifies that quitting feels too early in the moment but people looking back realize they quit too late. [14:27] Annie explains not quitting creates two problems: pursuing unhelpful goals plus losing opportunity cost of redirected resources. [15:03] Annie recommends using psychological distance through quitting coaches and kill criteria involving mental time travel. [16:19] Annie describes an exercise where executives set six-week benchmarks for underperforming employees, accelerating decisions. [19:38] Annie advises adding "unless" statements to goals since cost-benefit analyses change over time. [24:45] Annie addresses information paralysis by emphasizing the time-versus-accuracy trade-off in decisions. [30:49] Annie acknowledges self-knowledge matters but notes people have competing preferences between short-term wants and long-term values. [33:28] Annie explains how implicit decision-making allows bias to highlight factors supporting desired conclusions. [36:49] Annie explains explicit frameworks resolve short-term versus long-term conflicts by creating future accountability. [37:57] Annie tells negotiation clients every deal can be broken, paralleling keeping quitting as an option. [38:30] Annie addresses opportunity cost neglect where people focus on immediate goals without considering sacrifices. [44:32] Annie connects quitting to innovation since minimal starting information requires flexibility to pivot. [46:22] And remember…”If at first you don't succeed, try again, then quit, there's no point in being a damn fool about it.” - W.C. fields. Quotable Quotes "When you make decisions to start things, you are making those decisions under conditions of uncertainty." "When you're thinking about quitting, it will generally feel like it's too early. But when you're looking at someone from the outside, if you're coaching, it'll feel like they're too late." "We quit way too late, as judged by our happiness." "When we don't quit something that we ought to quit, we have a double problem. One problem is that we're doing something that isn't helping us achieve our goals. And the other problem is an opportunity cost problem." "You don't want the goal itself to become an object because it is a representation of a cost benefit analysis." "In order to be a really good innovator, you have to build in this whole idea of quit." "Every deal can be broken, and even if you break it's not broken." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Annie Duke Website | Annie Duke X | Annie Duke Facebook | Annie Duke LinkedIn | Annie Duke Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39288830

TLP488: From Fleeting Moments to Sustained Momentum 12/03/2025

TLP488: From Fleeting Moments to Sustained Momentum Bernie Banks is a professor and institute leader at Rice University and co-author of "The New Science of Momentum: How the Best Coaches and Leaders Build a Fire from a Single Spark." As a Brigadier General, he led West Point's Department of Behavioral Sciences and Leadership in his final military assignment. In this episode, Bernie decodes how fleeting moments morph into sustained momentum. Drawing on eight years of research, over 250 interviews and thousands of survey responses across sports, business, politics and the military, Bernie shares a tried-and-true model leaders can use to spark movement, sustain it, and redirect it when needed. Momentum doesn’t happen by accident—it’s built through small wins, clear culture, situation-readiness, and intentional follow-through. Whether you're leading a team, an organization, or your own career, listen in for practical tools to recognize the early spark, harness the energy, and turn it into a flame that drives real progress. You can find episode 488 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:27] Bernie explains the book originated from the 2017 Super Bowl when the Patriots came back from 28-3 to win against the Falcons. [06:39] Bernie explains momentum is overlooked because people view it as common sense rather than a vital leadership skill. [08:23] Bernie outlines the momentum model starts with leadership setting culture, then moving into preparation where leaders actively seek to generate momentum. [11:29] Bernie uses Nvidia as an example, explaining they made strategic decisions long ago to prepare for the AI revolution. [14:05] Bernie emphasizes "culture is not what you talk about, it's what you tolerate, it's what you reinforce." [15:35] Bernie shares Alan Mulally telling a disruptive Ford executive they needed a transition conversation because those behaviors wouldn't be tolerated. [19:23] Bernie quotes Warren Buffett on hiring: look for smart, driven, and principled people, never hiring someone high on the first two without the third. [21:57] Bernie explains hiring depends on whether you need to maintain or innovate. [25:05] Bernie advises being open and honest with people about gaps they'll have to address for the new reality. [27:39] Bernie explains momentum requires both managers who optimize systems and leaders who produce change. [30:36] Bernie notes the most effective leaders were high on both people and results orientation. [33:17] Bernie discusses the Pygmalion study, stating people rise to the level of expectations when leaders show vested interest in their well being. [34:51] Bernie explains he replaced "failure" with "embrace challenge" because failure has negative connotation and finality. [37:23] Bernie emphasizes intentionality matters, explaining legacy means our story will be told by others, not ourselves. [41:44] Bernie closes stating "momentum is leader business" and the book is designed as a how-to guide with immediate actions. [44:30] And remember…“The world is wide, and I will not waste my life in friction when it could be turned into momentum.” - Frances E. Willard Quotable Quotes "Culture is not what you talk about. It's what you tolerate. It's what you reinforce." "Results are one thing, but the how matters." "Momentum is not something they stumbled upon. It was something they actively sought to generate." "People will rise to the level of your expectations so long as they believe you have a vested interest in fostering their well being and that you're equipping them to meet those expectations." "In the best organizations, accountability is the word, and in many organizations, accountability is a bad word." "Challenges can lead to opportunities, and we can always learn things along the way as we push through challenges." "Legacy comes from the Latin word legatus, which means people, person, delegated, which means our story will not be told by self." “Be intentional. The great leaders are." "Momentum is a leader business. “ "A core obligation of every leader is to put their people in a position to win." "You don't put people in a position to win by watering down expectations." "Wherever there's a challenge, there's an opportunity." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Bernie Banks Facebook | Bernie Banks LinkedIn | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39246275

TLP487: Three Ways to Motivate Teams and Align Strategy 11/26/2025

TLP487: Three Ways to Motivate Teams and Align Strategy Hans Lagerweij is the author of The Why Whisperer: How to Motivate and Align Teams That Get Your Strategy Done. In this episode, Hans shares that he wrote the book after watching great strategies fail during execution. He saw a gap between understanding the importance of purpose and actually implementing it. Hans explains that you can't shout your way to purpose. Whispering requires getting close to your team and having two-way conversations. He emphasizes that leaders need to listen to personal motivations and ideas from team members. Hans presents three options when there's misalignment between personal and organizational purpose: change your personal why, take leadership to influence the organizational why, or leave. Listen to this episode to learn how to move your organization's purpose from theory into practice. You can find episode 487 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Hans Lagerweij on Three Ways to Motivate Teams and Align Strategy https://bit.ly/TLP-487 Key Takeaways [03:06] Hans reveals his first job at 15 was in a DIY store managing screws and tools, sparking his commercial curiosity. [05:04] Hans explains the “Why Whisperer” addresses the gap between Simon Sinek's purpose theory and practical implementation. [06:25] Hans attributes strategy failure to lack of discipline in communicating and aligning teams, not discipline itself. [07:06] Hans explains whispering means close two-way conversations with teams rather than top-down broadcasting. [10:37] Hans outlines three options for misaligned purposes: change your why, influence the organization's why, or leave. [15:35] Hans talks about clarifying the why and how that helps simplify decision making for leaders. [19:18] Hans recommends asking team members what makes them most proud to understand what drives them. [20:53] Hans introduces the "reverse elevator pitch" where leaders articulate direction, importance, and excitement in three minutes. [22:30] Hans explains “purpose” is universal across cultures but requires different communication approaches depending on cultural norms. [27:47] Hans challenges leaders to move “purpose” from wall posters into the organization's heartbeat. [28:50] And remember…“The louder the world becomes, the more radical it is to whisper truths. Not to be heard by all — but to be remembered by someone" - Lawrence Nault Quotable Quotes "You can't shout your way to purpose." " Whispering means you need to be so close with your team to have actually a conversation, a two way conversation and you know, to listen to ideas and personal motivations from your team. So yeah, it's really whispering to me is, you know, about getting people to own the why, not just follow it. So it is seriously going from a beautiful slogan on the wall to something that is, you know, in the hearts and minds. " "A clear purpose really helps, you know, to reduce options. Choices from a million to just a few right ones." "A clear purpose absolutely will save your time, will, you know, set your directions. As I said, it's your North Star." "Purpose is absolutely universal language, but, you know, you have to speak it in different accents." "In the end, the most powerful strategy is the one that your team believes in and that they're willing to fight for." "If there is a conflict between the two, if there's disconnect, it will always feel like misalignment. It will always feel like, you know, you're not at the place in that organization." "If you can synchronize individual and organizational purposes, you know, or wise, you know, then you create an authentic connection that really drives results." "In every culture, in every country, you know, people want to feel a sense of purpose. I think it's simply a fundamental human need." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Hans Lagerweij Website | Hans Lagerweij X | Hans Lagerweij LinkedIn | Hans Lagerweij Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39163290

TLP486: Unruly: Deconstruct the Rules, Defy the Norms, and Define Your Success 11/19/2025

TLP486: Unruly: Deconstruct the Rules, Defy the Norms, and Define Your Success Lauren Wittenberg Weiner is a speaker, business therapist, and bestselling author of Unruly: Deconstruct the Rules, Defy the Norms, and Define Your Success. In this episode, Lauren shares the pivotal moment that crystallized her unruly philosophy. When told she couldn't do something, she learned to transform that doubt into motivation rather than letting it paralyze her. She explains how reframing negative feedback as challenge fuel drives her leadership. Lauren explains the difference between gatekeepers who clone themselves and gateways who open doors. She tackles the transactional trap and why building an unconditionally supportive village matters more than networking scores. Lauren discusses managing multiple demanding roles through ruthless curation of priorities. She emphasizes that priorities must be constantly reassessed as circumstances change. Listen to this episode to learn how breaking free from conventional expectations can lead to more authentic success and fulfillment in both leadership and life. You can find episode 486 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | https://bit.ly/TLP-486 Key Takeaways [02:36] Lauren reveals she almost joined the circus as a dancer between college and graduate school after a friend who was a trapeze artist convinced her. [04:09] Lauren explains the philosophy of "unruly" crystallized over many years, starting when she was a "good girl" who did everything expected of her. [09:12] Lauren discusses her "prove me wrong" attitude, explaining she reframes negative feedback as a challenge rather than trying to forget it, using research about not thinking about a white bear. [13:09] Lauren outlines her three-step framework: know the rules, find the space between them, and change them when needed. [15:42] Lauren clarifies she's "not a big believer in breaking the rules" but rather in knowing what rules say, finding space within them, and changing them consciously and thoughtfully when they don't work. [22:16] Lauren describes the shift from leaders being "gatekeepers" who pick people who look and think like them to being "gateways" that allow different people to prove they're qualified. [25:28] Lauren discusses transactional versus non-transactional relationships, and emphasizes the importance of having an "unconditionally supportive village" of people who pick you up when you're down and cheer for you unconditionally when you succeed. [29:23] Lauren explains how redefining luck as preparation influenced their breakthrough when winning a $200 million SOCOM contract, saying "we didn't get lucky, we were prepared." [33:48] Lauren discusses "ruthless curation" of priorities as an iterative process, using the example of her kids being a priority but their spirit week costumes not being her priority. [37:54] Lauren advises her 35-year-old self to "stop worrying about what anyone else thinks, figure out what you want" and own your decisions without feeling guilty. [40:25] And remember…“Never assume you can't do something. Push yourself to redefine the boundaries.” - Brian Chesky Quotable Quotes "Just because you can do something doesn't mean you have to." "You can't hack your own psychology. You can't stop doing what your brain is going to make you do, but you can move around it and understand it and use it to your own advantage." "It's not about bringing people in that aren't qualified. It's about allowing people to show that they're qualified, even if they don't look or think or have gone on the exact same trajectory that everyone who came before did." "Transactional begets transactional and non transactional begets non transactional." "You've gotta have the same people who will pick you up when you're down and who will cheer for you unconditionally when you make it." "Stop worrying about what anyone else thinks, figure out what you want." "Nobody else gets to define for you what makes sense for you, but then own your decisions." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Lauren Wittenberg Weiner Website | Lauren Wittenberg Weiner Ted Talk on ""Credibility and Connection Through Thoughtful Authenticity ": Lauren Wittenberg Weiner Podcast | Lauren Wittenberg Weiner Facebook | Lauren Wittenberg Weiner LinkedIn | Lauren Wittenberg Weiner Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/39089260

TLP485: Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) 11/12/2025

TLP485: Transform Your Life (Before 8AM) Hal Elrod is the bestselling author of “The Miracle Morning: The Not-So-Obvious Secret Guaranteed to Transform Your Life (Before 8AM).” The book offers a practical morning routine that has transformed the lives of over 3 million people. In this episode, Hal describes discovering the six practices that became the SAVERS method (Silence, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, Scribing) during the 2008 financial crisis when he needed to rebuild his life and income. He shares how implementing these practices every morning doubled his income within two months and became the foundation for helping millions of others. Listen to the full episode to hear how Hal turned life's hardest moments into practical tools for personal transformation and daily excellence. You can find episode 485 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | https://bit.ly/TLP-485 Key Takeaways [02:44] Hal reveals he realized during cancer at 37 that he was a workaholic, so now he drives his kids to school daily and shortens his workday to align with his family priority. [04:33] Hal explains he learned the five minute rule at age 20 selling Cutco by feeling emotions for five minutes then saying "can't change it" and moving forward. [07:25] Hal recounts being hit by a drunk driver at 70 mph at age 20 where he broke 11 bones and died at the scene for six minutes but applied the five minute rule to accept his reality. [13:26] Hal confirms the five minute rule is the practical bridge to Viktor Frankl's concept of choosing one's attitude in any circumstance. [21:05] Hal explains the Miracle Morning program and why the morning routine is important for making every day your best day. [29:37] Hal shares that the expanded edition of his book adds 20 pages to the SAVERS section and two new chapters called the Miracle Evening and the Miracle Life. [33:00] Hal shares that he gives up three hours of work each day to drive his kids to school, choosing lasting memories with them over more book sales. [37:58] Hal explains that his experiences guide him toward a higher power’s purpose and shares that his parents’ response to his sister’s death taught him to turn adversity into service. [43:12] Hal defines a good life as fulfilling your potential in service of others by showing up as your best self every day from a place of love. [46:16] And remember…“When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” - Marcus Aurelius Quotable Quotes "It's okay to be negative and get upset when things don't go your way, but do not dwell on it for an extended period of time." "Set your timer for five minutes and give yourself five minutes to feel your emotions fully. Don't suppress them, don't try to act the way you think you should. Bitch, moan, complain, cry, vent, whatever you gotta do." "Every painful emotion that we experienced was self created by our resistance to our reality." "The last of man's freedoms, is to choose one's own attitude in any given set of circumstances." "You cannot change reality in this moment as it exists. You can only do things in this moment to change the next moment or the moment after that." "I believe that we create our own statistics." "Your level of success will seldom exceed your level of personal development." "If you win the morning, you win the day because you're putting yourself in a peak physical, mental, emotional and spiritual state." "Family men with businesses, not businessmen with families." (Front Row Dads tagline) "Everything you've been through is intentional and it's part of your journey, so you can help as many people as you possibly can." "Every day you wake up and you ask like, what's the best version of myself today? How can I show up at my best? How can I fulfill my limitless God given potential today?It's fulfilling your potential in service of others." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Hal Elrod Website | Achieve Your Goals Podcast | Hal Elrod X | Hal Elrod Facebook | Hal Elrod LinkedIn | Hal Elrod Instagram | Watch The Miracle Morning Movie for free: The Miracle Morning App | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38990000

TLP484: Balancing Innovation with Human Connection 11/05/2025

TLP484: Balancing Innovation with Human Connection Brandon Sawalich is the President and CEO of Starkey, leading 6,000 employees across 29 countries in the hearing healthcare industry. In this episode, Brandon addresses how healthcare leaders balance innovation with human connection. He explains that hearing health requires both cutting-edge AI technology and personalized care from healthcare professionals. He shares leadership lessons from guiding Starkey's transformation into a global brand while preserving its family culture. Brandon discusses how to maintain core values while under pressure to prioritize patient outcomes over stock market demands. Listen to this episode to discover how Brandon leads with purpose in an industry that transforms lives, balances innovation with human connection, and maintains company culture during global growth. You can find episode 484 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Brandon Sawalich on Balancing Innovation with Human Connection Key Takeaways [05:01] When asked about balancing innovation with human elements in healthcare, Brandon explains hearing technology has evolved from analog whistling devices to AI-powered solutions, noting "We were the first to pioneer using AI back in 2000, starting in 2017 and we're in our eighth generation now." [07:01] Brandon outlines leadership challenges in managing multiple stakeholders, emphasizing "What's best for the patient is best for our customer is best for Starkey." [08:26] When asked about protecting culture while growing globally, Brandon explains his approach: "We hire for attitude and develop the talent because that attitude has to fit within the Starkey culture." [10:04] Brandon describes their training philosophy as "the Starkey way," emphasizing mentoring over traditional training programs and stating "I want one way" rather than multiple programs. [12:14] When asked about balancing kindness with results, Brandon explains his leadership approach: "I work for you. We all have to hold each other accountable." [14:21] Brandon defines being "the best" in their industry by focusing on sound quality and ease of use, explaining "to be the best is yes, you have to run an efficient company" and have "the best sounding sound quality hearing aid in the world." [15:41] Brandon reveals the hearing aid industry structure: "The hearing aid industry is made up of five companies in the world. Starkey is the only US owned and operated." [16:56] When asked what makes him the best leader, Brandon emphasizes accessibility and continuous learning, stating "I'm always available to the team if they need it" and "I'm always curious." [19:58] When asked about being overwhelmed, Brandon explains he's not overwhelmed because "I love this company. I've been here 31 years and I'm honored to have the job." [24:06] Brandon shares pivotal experiences that shaped his leadership, including leading industry advocacy in Washington D.C. from 2017 and navigating COVID-19 challenges. [30:53] When asked about daily improvement, Brandon identifies time management as key: "my time management and am I spending, you know, the time on, you know, 20% of the things that are going to make an 80% impact for the company." [33:05] Brandon concludes with parting counsel for leaders: "Don't be a blockbuster. Push yourself. You know, innovate or die" and emphasizes "complacency kills." [34:19] And remember…"I have learned silence from the talkative, toleration from the intolerant, and kindness from the unkind, yet strange, I am ungrateful to those teachers" - Khalil Gibran. Quotable Quotes "It's not just about sound and amplifying sound. You have to personalize and customize something in a very personal business because you have to care and hearing healthcare professionals have to care about the patient in front of them and it's better hearing with a human touch." "You have to make your mistakes. You have to fail in order to improve yourself and move forward. You know, if you're going to fail fast." "If you got somebody that's not the right fit, you know, you have to be able to have the courage to hit that head on and make change." "It's not about coming up and say, well, you didn't produce this much. We need to sit down and talk. It's kind of sitting down and a little bit of a human approach. Common sense is, hey, tell me what's going on." "I'm not going to ask anybody to do anything that I wouldn't do myself. And I'll get a cup of coffee, I'll pick somebody up at the airport, whatever it takes. Because again, that's the team approach and very much lead from the front." "You got to be comfortable being uncomfortable." "Don't lose sleep over the competition, lose sleep over are we making progress or not? Are we getting better? Because complacency kills." "Don't be blockbuster. Push yourself. You know, innovate or die. And you've got to have the courage to change because change management. People's afraid of change." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Brandon Sawalich Website | Brandon Sawalich X | Brandon Sawalich LinkedIn | Brandon Sawalich Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38918060

TLP483: People Must Feel Valued Before They Can Add Value 10/29/2025

TLP483: People Must Feel Valued Before They Can Add Value Zach Mercurio is a researcher, and optimist instructor who specializes in purposeful leadership and meaningful work. He is the author of "The Power of Mattering: How Leaders Can Create a Culture of Significance," that reveals the psychological foundation that drives human energy and performance in organizations. Zach addresses why 60% of employees don't feel cared for at work and how this creates a mattering deficit leading to quiet quitting or toxic behaviors. He discusses the Optimism course he created with Simon Sinek, which focuses on developing human skills that show people their significance so they believe they can improve any situation. Zach reveals the three essential dimensions people need: feeling noticed (seen and heard), affirmed (their uniqueness makes a difference), and needed (relied upon and indispensable). He explains how organizations can maintain purpose as "the invisible leader" despite quarterly pressures, emphasizing that people won't contribute to bigger purposes until they first believe they're worthy of having one. Listen to discover why the age of AI makes human connection skills irreplaceable and learn the counterintuitive truth that people must feel valued before they can add value. You can find episode 483 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [05:59] Zach defines mattering as feeling significant through being valued and adding unique value. [08:05] Zach explains human energy comes from knowing we matter, with research showing lower cortisol in those who feel significant. [11:15] Zach describes the "mattering wheel" where feeling valued builds confidence to add value. [13:56] Zach notes 40% of feedback fails because people don't feel cared for by the giver. [18:54] Zach outlines "wise feedback": express belief, reaffirm capabilities, offer support. [22:12] Zach defines optimism as believing you can improve moments and explains how digital communication created human skills gaps. [29:22] Zach emphasizes only humans take moral responsibility while noting only 40% feel cared for at work. [33:22] Zach positions matter as a prerequisite to purpose - people must feel cared for before caring about work. [36:12] Zach advises asking "When you feel you matter to me, what am I doing?" and outlines three practices: noticed, affirmed, needed. [38:08] Zach states "hurry and care cannot coexist" and suggests using meetings for relationships, not information exchange. [42:17] Zach explains these "soft" skills need rigorous practice as attention spans dropped to 47 seconds and leadership requires separate human skills. [46:19] Zach challenges leaders to master human skills because leadership is a separate occupation requiring separate skills. [48:20] And remember…“The business of business is relationships; the business of life is human connection.” - Robin S. Sharma Quotable Quotes "It's almost impossible for anything to matter to someone who doesn't first believe that they matter." "All human energy is an outcome of knowing that we matter." "The ultimate energizer is knowing that you and your life and your work are worthy of your energy." "We don't build confidence on our own. We build true confidence when we know someone has our back." "People need to be valued to add value." "Feeling valued gives us the confidence we need to add value. The more we add value, the more we see the evidence of our significance, the more we feel valued." "Hurry and care cannot coexist." "When leaders can't connect, they usually try to control. We try to control what we don't understand." "Loneliness is not the outcome of being alone. Loneliness is the outcome of feeling that you don't matter." "It's the quality of the interaction that matters, not the quantity when it comes to loneliness." "People will not care until they feel cared for." "Leadership is a separate occupation. It is a separate occupation that requires a separate set of skills." "Optimism is the belief that the future can be better and that I have what it takes to make it better." "AI will take your job if you do not master the human skills to cultivate trust and care." "The heart of leadership is to inspire." "Feedback without a relationship comes across as aggression." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Zach Mercurio Website | Zach Mercurio Facebook | Zach Mercurio LinkedIn | Zach Mercurio Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38818750

TLP482: The 100 Best Books for Work and Life 10/22/2025

TLP482: The 100 Best Books for Work and Life Todd Sattersten brings over 20 years of experience in nonfiction book publishing, and is the author of "The 100 Best Books for Work and Life." He's also the publisher at Bard Press and has dedicated his career to helping leaders navigate the overwhelming world of business literature. In this episode, Todd reveals how he curated 100 essential books into 25 problem-focused chapters, moving beyond traditional business categories to address both professional and personal challenges leaders face. He explains why growth comes from believing change is possible and how daily effort accumulates into meaningful progress. Todd discusses the shift from data-heavy business books toward more introspective, permission-giving literature that acknowledges the chaotic nature of modern leadership. Todd discusses the difficulty of finding quality fiction with positive leadership examples and his preference for books that help readers ask different questions rather than provide step-by-step formulas. Todd concludes by stressing the importance of reading with intention, distinguishing between reading for entertainment versus insight, and building sustainable reading habits that focus on addressing real challenges rather than collecting impressive quotes. Listen to discover how to navigate information overload, identify truly transformative books, and develop the reading habits that separate effective leaders from those who simply accumulate knowledge. You can find episode 482 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:42] Todd explains his selection process started with 60-70 known books, then Todd describes how the 25 topics emerged naturally from the books themselves - goal setting, habits, leadership, relationships, motivation. [06:48] Todd identifies two key patterns to accumulate people's consistent actions: "growth comes from the belief that change is possible" and "daily effort matters." [13:28] Todd explains that great books redefine problems to create different solutions, citing examples like focusing on better customers rather than better products. [16:02] Todd reveals he's nervous about trendy books, especially about companies or leaders that don't hold up over time. [20:51] Todd believes people recognize tremendous value in listening to work others have already done, whether from Stoics, Buddhists, or other traditions. [23:50] Todd emphasizes reading requires choosing between entertainment versus insight, asking "how will I act differently after reading this." [27:03] Todd explains the data-heavy book trend came from 30 years of neuroscience research but now sees a shift toward permission-giving books. [31:50] Todd identifies "Your Brain at Work" by David Rock as his top pick for explaining brain function limitations. [35:40] Todd describes "Reboot" by Jerry Colonna as transformative for connecting personal stories to leadership effectiveness. [39:17] Todd concludes by encouraging leaders to "build a habit of reading" since most successful leaders are readers. [40:09] And remember…”The things I want to know are in books. My best friend is the man who will get me a book I ain't read.” - Abraham Lincoln. Quotable Quotes “Growth comes from the belief that change is possible.” “Daily effort matters.” “A different way to define the problem creates a different way to solve the problem.” “If you don’t understand the stories that you have about yourself, then you can’t possibly be the best possible leader.” “Fiction can provide a really great perspective.” “The work is internal most of the time. It’s not, hey, I need to go fix some business thing.” “Leadership is a journey of growth.” “A book still does something that almost every other art form doesn’t do.” “The people who understand the value of books understand there’s a tremendous value in listening to the work others have already done.” “Identifying a set of effective solutions… that’s what leaders need.” “Please build a habit of reading. I can’t think of a better habit for a leader.” These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Todd Sattersten Website | Todd Sattersten LinkedIn | Todd Sattersten Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38736860

TLP481: The New Language of Leadership with Michael Ventura 10/15/2025

TLP481: The New Language of Leadership with Michael Ventura Michael Ventura is an entrepreneur, author of “Applied Empathy: The New Language of Leadership”, and advisor to leaders at organizations including the ACLU, Google, Nike, and the UN. He has taught emotionally intelligent leadership at Princeton, West Point, and Esalen. In this episode, Michael explores why our natural childhood empathy fades as adults due to life complexity, cultural conditioning, and survival mechanisms that suppress this innate behavior. He explains how organizational design can create systems where empathy thrives through measurement, rewards, and leadership modeling rather than trying to change people individually. Michael outlines seven empathetic archetypes that leaders can shift between like gears: the Sage (practices presence), Inquirer (asks great questions), Convener (creates connection environments), Confidant (builds trust), Cultivator (provides vision), Seeker (values self-work), and Alchemist (experiments and learns). He emphasizes knowing when to shift archetypes based on circumstances and people. He addresses why leaders struggle to guide rather than control, explaining how successful leaders must transition from having answers to asking questions and empowering others. Michael explains empathy's benefits through a GE medical imaging case study where understanding patient experience led to environmental changes that cut pain complaints in half and increased cancer detection by over 10%. Listen to this episode to discover how empathy drives retention, innovation, and competitive advantage while serving as both leadership skill and business strategy. You can find episode 481 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:19] Michael explains that empathy fades as we age because life beats it out of us in some ways. [05:10] Michael outlines three types of empathy: affective (golden rule), somatic (physical experience), and cognitive (platinum rule). [07:27] Michael emphasizes that empathy must be embraced and modeled as a behavior from the top all the way down. Michael warns that empathy requires a code of ethics because "sociopaths are good cognitive empaths." [10:11] Michael clarifies that his keynote's first slide always says empathy is not about being nice. [13:06] Michael describes seven empathic archetypes as "gears in a manual transmission" that leaders should shift between. [19:05] Michael advises leaders to ask "How do you learn? How are you motivated?" to diagnose which archetype to use. [22:18] Michael states "Leaders should only do what an individual or team cannot do for itself" because leaders must transition from having all the answers to asking the right questions. [23:47] Michael shares that West Point teaches empathy because officers must lead people from "every socioeconomic stripe imaginable." [29:07] Michael cites retention as a hard benefit, noting it costs "1 1/2 times the salary" to replace someone. [35:54] Michael shares what he wandered; he's writing a book about moving from "North Star thinking to constellation thinking" for purpose. [38:33] Michael observes society lost its "emotional commons" where everyone shared the same cultural experiences. [42:17] Michael advises leaders to start empathy work "where the need is the greatest" rather than organization-wide. [43:42] And remember...“I think we all have empathy. We may not have enough courage to display it.” - Maya Angelou Quotable Quotes "Life beats it out of us in some ways." "We start to see ourselves as the main character a little too much sometimes and forget that there are other characters in the play all around us." "Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. And the only way you're going to know that answer is if you do two things that most humans don't want to do. Admit they don't have an answer and then go ask the uncomfortable question." "Sometimes the most empathic thing that you do is say the hard thing or do the hard thing for someone else." "Stop trying to be the most interesting person in the room and start trying to be the most interested person in the room." "Leaders should only do what an individual or team cannot do for itself." "Don't tell people what to do. Tell them what outcome you want and let them surprise you with how they get it done." "When something is powerful and something is effective, just recognize it can be used for bad as well." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Michael Ventura Website | Michael Ventura X | Michael Ventura Facebook | Michael Ventura LinkedIn | Michael Ventura Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38249565

TLP480: Number One Factor for Changing Team Behaviors with Tamara Myles 10/08/2025

TLP480: Number One Factor for Changing Team Behaviors with Tamara Myles Tamara Myles is a speaker, professor, and co-author of "Meaningful Work: How to Ignite Passion and Performance in Every Employee." She specializes in the science of human flourishing at work and serves as faculty at Boston College and the University of Pennsylvania. In this episode, Tamara challenges the biggest misconception leaders hold about purpose and productivity. She explains how leaders often view these as opposing forces, when research shows they actually create a virtuous cycle that drives engagement, performance, and innovation. Tamara emphasizes that self-awareness through intentional reflection time is essential for productivity, as leaders who carve out solitude to think strategically can better connect their work to meaningful impact. Tamara shares insights from studying positive outlier organizations and leaders who excel at creating meaningful work environments. She identifies role modeling as the number one factor that moves the needle in changing team behavior and performance. Discover how purpose and productivity work together to create high-performing teams that feel fulfilled in their work. You can find episode 480 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | https://bit.ly/TLP-480 Key Takeaways [02:53] Tamara explains the biggest misconception is that purpose and productivity "are at odds with each other" when they "create a virtuous cycle." [03:49] Tamara confirms leaders are responsible for 48% of our experience of meaning at work. [05:51] Tamara outlines her framework of three pillars: community, contribution, and challenge. [10:30] Tamara emphasizes that "clarity around values" is foundational to meaningful work. [12:49] Tamara highlights that reflection is actually a huge part of creating that meaning at work. [15:40] Tamara explains that bad management habits get passed down from generation to generation. [18:49] Tamara identifies "role modeling the behaviors" as "the number one needle mover." [21:48] Tamara confirms that alignment between spoken values and actual behaviors is huge. [25:57] Tamara explains to work on things that are important but not urgent yet. [30:02] Tamara defines community as "do I matter here," contribution as "does what I do matter," and challenge as "does my growth matter here." [32:29] Tamara shares that Americans are "much more achievement driven" while Brazilians are "much more relational." [36:38] Tamara explains workplaces are one of the last places where people from different backgrounds still come together. Tamara discusses that what really matters is how they design the time that they are together. Tamara connects consequences to "going back to clarity and expectations. [42:44] Tamara closes with three daily questions: "who did I connect with," "is something better in the world," and "did I learn something today." [44:44] And remember…“Let the beauty of what you love be what you do.” - Rumi Quotable Quotes "Purpose is a symptom." "Clear is kind." "Reflection is actually a huge part of creating that meaning at work." "These bad management habits get passed down from generation to generation." "The number one needle mover is role modeling the behaviors that they want to see." "Alignment between spoken values and then actual behaviors is huge." "We are all humans. We are fallible. Nobody's perfect." "Our workplaces are one of the last places where people from different backgrounds with different ideologies, different beliefs, different skills, maybe different languages, you know, still come together to work on a common goal. What really matters is how they design the time that they are together." "We can have discipline without being rigid." "Every meeting is a decision support system." "Sometimes you need to be direct and you need to be, you know, quick thinking and acting and sometimes you need to be patient." "People just don't know how to run meetings. People don't know how to do the basics of like, follow up and all that. It's just, it's really epidemic bad." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Tamara Myles Website | Tamara Myles LinkedIn | Tamara Myles Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37887705

TLP479: Make Work Fair with Siri Chilazi 10/01/2025

TLP479: Make Work Fair with Siri Chilazi Siri Chilazi is a senior researcher at the Women in Public Policy Program at Harvard Kennedy School, and co-author of "Make Work Fair: Data-Driven Design for Real Results." She helps organizations bridge the gap between research and practice using evidence-based approaches to workplace fairness. In this episode, Siri explains why workplace fairness requires redesigning systems rather than changing people, demonstrating how structured processes like predetermined interview questions produce less biased results than open-ended conversations. She argues that organizations must analyze workforce data to reveal bias patterns in hiring, feedback quality, and career advancement, treating fairness metrics with the same rigor as financial data in business decisions. Siri presents evidence from studies showing that traditional diversity training fails to change actual behavior despite positive participant feedback. She recommends structural alternatives like specific performance evaluation prompts, automated feedback reminders, and technology tools that flag biased language in assessments. She advocates for opt-out promotion systems that automatically evaluate eligible employees rather than requiring them to self-advocate, sharing how this approach increased women and people of color's advancement rates. Siri outlines her three-part framework: "Make it Count" through data tracking, "Make it Stick" via small process tweaks, and "Make it Normal" by shaping workplace culture through individual actions and standards. Siri addresses resistance management by framing fairness discussions around business results rather than ideology, explaining how even skeptical leaders find evidence-based approaches make practical sense for organizational success. In this episode, you’ll discover practical, evidence-based strategies for creating fairer workplaces through smart system design rather than individual behavior change. You can find episode 479 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:21] Siri reveals it's much faster, easier, often cheaper, and more effective to change surrounding environments rather than individual brains. [04:59] Siri describes a more effective approach involving asking all candidates the same set of questions in the same order and assessing answers comparatively. [07:07] Siri confirms fairness was chosen intentionally because research shows it's a universally shared human value globally that fairness resonates with leaders because it's impossible to spot talent accurately without it. [09:52] Siri clarifies data can be a powerful engine for change only if actively harnessed and analyzed to reveal insights. [13:48] Siri outlines how organizations should ask whether employees get feedback of the same length and spend different amounts of time at given ranks before promotion. [16:15] Siri explains bias tends to creep into potential assessments because they're more subjective with less formal data. [17:39] Siri confirms more than half a century's worth of studies showing diversity training basically doesn't shift people's behavior making performance evaluation prompts more specific and close-ended as a more effective approach. [23:30] Siri describes opt-out systems where everyone meeting certain criteria gets automatically evaluated for promotion versus opt-in systems. [27:31] Siri explains how an Australian employer reduced the gender gap by telling rejected candidates they were in the top 20% of applicants. [30:16] Siri outlines her three-part framework: make it count, make it stick, and make it normal. [32:54] Siri identifies the biggest resistance that occurs when changes touch leaders' own everyday work directly. [34:01] Siri explains her core aspiration is to shift discussions about fairness from ideology and emotion to data and evidence. [39:44] Siri invites everyone to think of one thing in their daily work they could tweak slightly to make it more fair. [41:04] And remember…“Though force can protect in an emergency, only justice, fairness, consideration and cooperation can finally lead men to the dawn of eternal peace.” - Dwight D. Eisenhower Quotable Quotes "Our behaviors are often shaped by the environments that surround us, right? The physical environments, but also the policies, the processes, the norms, the stereotypes, the culture, so to speak. And those external forces shape us to a much greater degree than we realize." "If we want to shift behaviors, it's much faster, easier, often cheaper, and most importantly, much more effective to change that surrounding environment, those systems and processes, rather than to try to change our individual brains." "There's a lot of research that shows that fairness is a universally shared human value globally. Right. People gravitate to fairness. Kids as young as 4 and 5 years old develop a really sophisticated understanding of fairness." "It's actually impossible without fairness to spot talent accurately, to truly hire the best people, and then to evaluate those people objectively so that we make sure that we're advancing and promoting the best, most competent people rather than the ones who, for example, appear most confident on the surface." "Data can be a powerful engine for change, but only if we harness it as such, only if we actively make the data speak." "People often subjectively love the trainings. They'll give it an 11 out of 10 on the score form and they'll report that, oh yes, I learned all these new things I didn't know before. I'm much more motivated now to make sure that I don't evaluate people in a biased way. But then when we follow up with them and see what they actually do in six months, in 12 months, in two years, we just don't see evidence of behavior change." "We often confuse confidence with competence. So just because someone's pounding the table, applying for everything, saying, me, me, I'm ready, give me a raise, promote me, put me on this, that doesn't mean that they're actually the most skilled or competent person for that task." "I really think if. If we make sure we create a culture where people matter, they're appreciated, and that they belong. And again, what surrounds that is fairness. Of course. And again, you know, the whole idea is, you know, you're working toward results. You know, you grow your people, you grow the company." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Siri Chilazi Website | Siri Chilazi LinkedIn | Siri Chilazi Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37874755

TLP478: The Consequences of Inaction with Nick Cooney 09/24/2025

TLP478: The Consequences of Inaction with Nick Cooney Nick Cooney is the founder and managing partner of Lever VC, an early stage fund focused on food and ag tech innovation. He also founded the Lever Foundation, a nonprofit dedicated to advancing a humane and sustainable food system, and authored "What We Don't Do: Inaction in the Face of Suffering and the Drive to Do More." In this episode, Nick tackles the Malthusian Trap debate and explains why more people face starvation today in raw numbers than ever before, despite technological advances in food production. He argues that capitalism alone cannot solve global food insecurity because it represents a complex systems problem requiring economic development, better governance, and philanthropic intervention beyond market mechanisms. Nick draws on evolutionary psychology to explain why people naturally care more about local issues than distant suffering, advocating for logic-based approaches to maximize impact. He emphasizes that organizational success breeds engagement more than empowerment structures, warning that flattened organizations often create accountability confusion and poor decision-making when people lack necessary expertise. Nick stresses that leaders should focus on helping teams achieve clear, meaningful results rather than prioritizing feel-good management approaches that may undermine actual effectiveness. Listen to this episode to explore how leaders can address complex global challenges while building more effective and engaged organizations. You can find episode 478 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | https://bit.ly/TLP-478 Key Takeaways [02:17] Nick reveals something not found online that he practices what he preaches by donating a large portion of his annual income to support efforts that reduce suffering in the world. [03:03] Nick explains the struggle with food distribution despite production advances noting that while technology has made food production more efficient there are more people living in extreme poverty and facing starvation today than hundreds of years ago due to raw population growth. [06:45] Nick outlines why investment money sometimes goes to the wrong places explaining there is a fadish nature to venture capital where certain things get in fashion plus ag-tech innovation is often slower to be adopted than other technologies and faces regulatory challenges. [10:26] Nick addresses why capitalism has not solved world hunger stating that while there has been good progress with the percentage of global population in extreme poverty trending down free markets alone are not going to be a full solution. [14:38] Nick explains what drives people to care about issues noting that humans are descended from apes optimized for survival in pre-Agrarian life giving us strong instincts to care about those close to us but having far less concern for those out of sight. [19:16] Nick clarifies his focus is not specifically on hunger but on animal suffering because he spends most of his time on animal suffering since it is an area where there is huge amounts of extreme suffering that does not have to be there. [22:05] Nick discusses managing teams in impact-focused organizations explaining he has been fortunate that his entities were working in areas with clear positive impact so people were attracted to work there because of the positive impact they knew they were having. [27:20] Nick agrees with concerns about flattening organizations stating that excessive flatness can lead to suboptimal results because people may not have the expertise to make smart decisions and it can make empowered people feel discouraged when they fail. [30:49] Nick confirms the abundance-scarcity parallel in organizational design explaining that companies flush with cash get very fat with higher burn rates while cash-tight companies are forced into much smarter decision making by economic necessity. [33:44] Nick explains the impact of inaction in corporate settings noting there is a huge bias towards focusing on what we are doing ethically rather than consequences of inaction but today the biggest harms are caused by failing to put time, money or mental energy into helping those facing extreme suffering. [39:53] Nick reflects on duty of care laws stating it is interesting that legally we treat a child 10 feet away versus 200 feet away dramatically differently even though the outcome is exactly the same if both children suffer and die. [45:28] Nick emphasizes the incredible power individuals actually have, explaining we can save hundreds of lives and spare hundreds of thousands of animals from suffering through really cost efficient charities which means we have a greater level of responsibility to use that power well. [47:21] And remember...“The worst sin toward our fellow creatures is not to hate them, but to be indifferent to them; that’s the essence of inhumanity.” - George Bernard Shaw Quotable Quotes “What did evolution optimize us for as a species? Survival." "I think it's really important to bring in logic, thoughtfulness, a quantitative analysis if we really want to do the most good that we can." "Any one of us, at least those of us living in the us, Europe, semi industrialized or industrialized countries, we have the ability to literally save the lives of hundreds, thousands of people, spare hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands of others from intense suffering." "Free markets alone are not going to solve the problem. They can help it, but there's, or in some cases could hurt it as well." "Today the biggest harms that we cause to others are not caused by bad actions we take. They're caused by our inactions failing to put time, money, or as you were alluding to mental energy into helping those who are facing extreme suffering." "We actually have this really incredible amount of power. We don't think that we do." "Occasionally when everyone is empowered to do something, like no one knows who's supposed to step up and do something, and you kind of get into this situation where you can be a victim of, let's say, the bystander effect." "There is a system for many things that does keep us in check about, keep us accountable for the things we do not do. And that would be in our legal system." "Part of the job of a leader, whether you're trying to run a business or a nonprofit or save the world, is you're trying to get people to care." "I don't know that we spend enough time on the design part and step back and go, well, how do we design an environment where we get the right behaviors psychologically." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Nick Cooney Website | Nick Cooney X | Nick Cooney Facebook | Nick Cooney LinkedIn | Nick Cooney Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37727685

TLP477: Myths About Intuition with Sara Sabin 09/17/2025

TLP477: Myths About Intuition with Sara Sabin Sara Sabin is an executive leadership and intuition coach. In this episode, she shares her core philosophy that leadership starts with mastering your internal world. Sara describes how leaders can rewire thought patterns through simple daily exercises, explaining the neuroscience behind how small efforts compound for dramatic confidence improvements. She tackles the biggest intuition myth that emotions equal gut feelings, explaining true intuition appears as clear, emotionless flashes while emotions masquerade as insight. Listen to discover why leaning into discomfort and maintaining sharp thinking skills will determine whether you thrive or become obsolete in an AI-driven world. You can find episode 477 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:21] Sara explains AI laziness wasn't "one lightning moment" but "a slow creep" of observing marketing and content "starting to look the same." [05:25] Sara distinguishes AI from human delegation, noting team members get the opportunity to expand in a certain area and to use their brain. [07:31] Sara clarifies AI can complement critical thinking if "used after you've done the critical thinking part" but warns replacement impairs your "ability to stand out." [15:01] Sara reveals her core insight that "leadership is an inside job" with every leadership skill having "an internal component." [17:22] Sara explains emotional regulation isn't about "transcending emotion" but "the ability to acknowledge emotions, accept them" when triggered. [20:50] Sara explains habitual thought patterns influence your belief systems which determine your actions and changing them is easier than you might think. [26:30] Sara busts the myth that "emotion is not the same as intuition," defining real intuition as "a very clear, emotionless flash." [32:36] Sara outlines her worst-case AI scenario where "everyone starts to look the same" mentally, losing creativity and becoming "open to manipulation." [39:41] Sara challenges listeners to lean into discomfort and not get lazy while maintaining a sharp brain. [41:17] And remember...“By far, the greatest danger of Artificial Intelligence is that people conclude too early that they understand it.” - Eliezer Yudkowsky Quotable Quotes "Leadership is an inside job." "Lean into discomfort. Don't get lazy." "Emotion is not the same as intuition." "Your habitual thought patterns influence your belief systems which determine your actions and behaviors and therefore your results." "A little bit of effort every day goes a long way." "Unless you understand the internal pieces that drive the external strategy and make it work, then you won't ever get to the realm of being exceptional." "Until you are in a place of emotional neutrality, you cannot be an excellent communicator, period." "Intuition is just a very clear, emotionless flash of something." "Use your emotional triggers and your resistance to things to learn something." "Pay attention to when you get triggered, it's pointing to a layer that you need to shed." "AI can be a tool to augment and improve critical thinking, but it can't replace critical thinking." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Sara Sabin Website | Sara Sabin LinkedIn | Sara Sabin X | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/38099915

TLP476: Engineering Social Change with Jed Brewer 09/10/2025

TLP476: Engineering Social Change with Jed Brewer Jed Brewer is the president and founder of Good Loud Media, a nonprofit organization that uses music and video to drive social impact in underserved communities around the world. In this episode, Jed describes how Good Loud Media operates by bringing together Grammy-winning musicians, renowned psychologists, and subject matter experts to create targeted media campaigns. Jed explores the concept of empathy in leadership and violence prevention. He explains how mass violence stems from a "death of empathy" where people demonize their enemies, and how perspective-taking through music can help restore human connection even in conflict zones. Jed shares his approach to networking as a superpower for creating change. He emphasizes that success is always a team effort and encourages leaders to view their network as the foundation of any meaningful impact. Listen to this episode to discover how music can be engineered to solve complex social problems and learn practical strategies for building powerful networks that drive systemic change. You can find episode 476 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:23] Jed reveals something people can't find about him online, that he grew up playing in rock bands and learned at 14 that "music has the power to bring us together" and can "create a place where people feel welcome when they don't feel welcome in other places." [03:36] Jed explains his journey from being a preacher's kid to prison chaplain and also describes how his passion developed through the fusion between music and technology that led him to study engineering while maintaining his love for music, understanding that "technology is a way to drive that forward." [07:02] Jed explains how he got into prison outreach and outlines his startup experience. He reveals a breakthrough discovery. [13:07] Jed explains the business case for underserved populations, noting that pharmaceutical companies are "leaving money on the table" because potential customers aren't aware of life-saving products like HIV medications that "could be using these products." [15:47] Jed connects his faith background to his mission, explaining that his personal faith centers on "love your neighbor as yourself" and finding ways to "reduce human suffering." [17:03] Jed explains how he brings high-caliber people together and he describes the Narcan project. Jed identifies the messaging challenge where some people viewed Narcan as "something that drug users would have" he also outlines his collaborative process where he works with subject matter experts. [24:27] Jed describes distribution strategy where they put the song "everywhere" - radio, social media, and in-person community outreach - celebrating most when "people amplify it to their own network." [26:54] Jed explains his international focus where he started building relationships with creatives worldwide for cost-effective production and he reveals their focus on preventing mass violence. Jed describes their Nigerian mental health success where they embedded therapeutic breathing exercises in music. [32:57] Jed explains music's unique power, noting that unlike speeches that tell people what to think, music tells them "what to think and how to feel at the same time" because "people don't have their guards up about music." [35:48] Jed defines empathy through perspective taking, explaining that empathy begins with consciously thinking "what would it be like to be this other person" and seeing enemies as human beings, even those you disagree with. [40:18] Jed emphasizes networking importance, stating "Your network is your net worth" and "I don't think anybody succeeds alone" because success is always team success, so "the question is, who's on your team?" [44:25] Jed describes his leadership transition where Good Loud Media is shifting from him "doing everything" to "setting other people up to be the people that are doing things" as they expand internationally. [47:27] Jed delivers his closing call to action, saying "You have a vision in your head of something that you can do to make the world a better place... Do it. Now is the time... The world needs you." [49:10] And remember...“Where words fail, music speaks.” - Hans Christian Andersen Quotable Quotes "I learned as a kid that music has the power to bring us together. I learned when I was 14 that music can create a place where people feel welcome when they don't feel welcome in other places." "I have always been a firm believer that networking is just how we all get where we're going. We all do better when we've got the riches of friendship." "Dig your well before you're thirsty." For me, the living out of that faith has to do with love your neighbor as yourself…I think that all of us can agree that whenever possible, lessening the amount of suffering in the world and lessening the amount of suffering that our neighbors and that our loved ones face is the morally right thing for us to pursue." "I have discovered few things that produce as much genuine magic as simply asking... There's a famous phrase, you have not, because you ask not. I have learned to ask pretty boldly for things, and most of the time people say yes." "Your network is your net worth. The people that, you know, are. That is your riches in life." "I don't think anybody succeeds alone... I think that success is always team success." "You're telling them what to think and how to feel at the same time. Music is a guided meditation that has both a cognitive and an emotive aspect happening in parallel."In mass violence, there's a death of empathy." "The only way forward is to see our enemies as human beings. And that really is what empathy is." "I think empathy in many ways begins and ends with perspective taking." "There are different seasons in life and there are different phases, and we pass in and out of them." "You have a vision in your head of something that you can do to make the world a better place. I know you do... Do it. Now is the time. Not next week, not next year. Do it. Get started. It won't get easier. The best time to do it is right now.We need you. Get to work. This is your moment, the sign you've been waiting for. This is that sign. Get started with your thing that's going to make the world a better place." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Jed Brewer Website | Good Loud Media Facebook | Jed Brewer LinkedIn | Good Loud Media Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37727570

TLP475: Democratic Leadership: Building Agency with Nicola Ilic 09/03/2025

TLP475: Democratic Leadership: Building Agency with Nicola Ilic Nicola Ilic is a social entrepreneur, activist, and adjunct professor of leadership at Georgetown University. He's the founder of Changelab and applies lessons from grassroots movements to transform how leaders build agency in others. In this episode, Nikola defines democratic leadership as enabling people to exercise leadership regardless of title when facing uncertainty rather than voting or consensus-building. The key difference is that instead of becoming the authority figure people depend on, democratic leaders create agency in their teams to handle challenges independently. He says that most leadership development initiatives fail to transform because they focus on comprehension rather than experiential learning. Nicola discusses the challenge facing emerging leaders who grew up in protected environments and can't handle uncertainty, explaining how leaders must create developmental challenges for their teams. Listen to discover how to enable others to reach their leadership potential. You can find episode 475 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:34] Nikola reveals he played basketball seriously in Serbia as a point guard, which taught him "individual excellence, work ethics and team play." [04:20] Nikola explains democratic leadership centers around "how do you relate to uncertainty" based on observing his young daughters. He notes that "authoritarians are always also fear mongers" because creating fear makes people search for a parental authority figure. [08:40] Nikola says to make our companies, our teams, our organizations better is to focus on the core, which is enabling people to "exercise leadership in the face of uncertainty, no matter what is their title". [11:53] He emphasizes that transformation requires "tacit learning" through immersed experience, like presenting to 40 CEOs despite being scared. [18:34] He shares his two most powerful questions: "what do you think?" and "tell me more" which he uses with kids, students, and everyone to develop their thinking. [20:50] Nikola explains how leaders course-correct reactive behavior is that leaders must enable all the talents because you need all the brains you can get. [26:07] He clarifies that "voting is not democracy - it's the ability to surface various ideas, let them compete and then come up with the best one" creating a "free market of ideas" and co-creation process. [31:15] Nikola teaches that effective democratic leaders must "differentiate initiative and extroversion from leadership" and act like "a conductor in the orchestra" who knows each team member's personality and draws out contributions from introverted members. [34:31] He notices three things in young leaders: people from "well protected childhoods" have "underdeveloped their ability to handle uncertainty," everyone is "looking for purpose," and many feel "there's something deeper that we need to change." [37:28] Nikola confirms students must test themselves and asks them "what is the highest good you can imagine?" because "when you aim for something that's huge" and believe in it, "challenges will feel very differently." [40:56] He shares growing up in Serbia during the 1990s war, joining a movement against dictatorship as a teenager, and discovering "we as kids can organize and use nonviolence to overthrow the worst dictator in Europe." [44:31] Nikola invites listeners to become "activists in unlikely places" by building allies through one-on-one conversations before making interventions. [48:15] And remember…“Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change.” - Confucius Quotable Quotes "It just makes you person with a title and authority. Yeah, it's. I like to use this metaphor of, you know, if you see a person with a knife, what do you say oh, here's a chef. Or do you say oh, here's a murderer? Well, it depends what they do with the knife. It's the same with power, authority and title." "The core of Democratic leadership is how do you relate to uncertainty? How do you enable people to exercise leadership in the face of uncertainty, no matter what is their title." "Once acquire self reliance, kill is now there. And it's part of her identity, it's part of pride." "What do you think? And tell me more. These are two most powerful questions." "If you talk to anyone who built a successful business, they always tell you it's about playing a long game because who cares about short term if it's going to be wiped out long term?" "It's not voting. Voting is not democracy. Voting is just A part of democracy, right? It's the ability to surface various ideas, let them compete and then come up with the best one." "As Nietzsche said, he or she who knows why to live can bear. Anyhow, if you're doing something that you believe in, challenges will feel very differently." "If you want to change something in your organization, you can, but you have to think about it as a little activist project." "We got to connect the comprehension to the actual transformation." "At the end of the day, country, company, whatever it is, the vote happens with dollars. Okay, where do consumers spend their money? Consumers spend their money. That's how the best ideas percolate to the top and win." "We control two things. Where we spend our time and how we respond to our environment." "Your circle of influence is bigger than you think, potentially. "There's three things you can do. You can suck it up, you can try to change it, or you can move on." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | ChangeLab | Nicola Ilic LinkedIn | Nicola Ilic's Newsletter: "Pulse of Change" | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37715705

TLP474: Four Barriers that Stop Leaders with Anne Marie Anderson 08/27/2025

TLP474: Four Barriers that Stop Leaders with Anne Marie Anderson Anne Marie Anderson is a three-time Emmy winner with 36 years in sports television, including a decade as a producer at ESPN working with elite athletes and executives. She's the author of "Cultivating Audacity: Dismantle Doubt and Let Yourself Win" and has navigated multiple career pivots throughout her professional life. In this episode, Anne Marie reveals that audacity isn't reserved for the naturally fearless but can be developed as a learnable skill. Anne Marie explains that true audacity requires getting comfortable with failure, surviving it, and trying again. She identifies four barriers that stop leaders: fear, time, money, and that inner critic. Elite performers don't silence their inner critic but examine its messages with neutral curiosity. Anne Marie teaches her catastrophize your life technique for evaluating risks by imagining the worst possible outcomes. This helps distinguish between legitimate concerns and irrational fears that paralyze decision-making. She emphasizes that the cost of inaction is always higher than the price of failure. Anne Marie introduces the concept of your front row, the people who challenge you and tell you the truth. She advocates for shape shifting leadership and shares how vulnerability became key to her transformation. If you're ready to stop letting fear control your biggest decisions, this episode is essential listening. You can find episode 474 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:42] Anne Marie reveals what's not publicly known about her: she did adventure travel before kids, rafting dangerous rivers, climbing to Everest base camp, and trekking gorillas in the Congo. [03:39] She explains that audacity requires practice with failing and getting comfortable with failure because "if you're not failing, you're really not pushing yourself to be audacious." [04:32] Anne Marie advises understanding why you want to make a change first, then evaluating what you're willing to risk to get there. [06:18] She identifies that elite athletes control their inner critic by recognizing it and examining messages with neutral curiosity rather than trying to silence it. Anne Marie defines audacity as "optimism that you're going to survive no matter how they work out." [08:26] Anne Marie intentionally shares her failures with her children, showing them rejections she gets to normalize failure as information. [11:36] She shares what to do differently to confront the fear and recommends catastrophizing situations to their ridiculous extreme. [17:06] She explains that your "front row" should be people who challenge and push you, not necessarily your best friends who want to keep you safe. [22:48] Anne Marie describes leaders as "shape shifters" who tailor their approach to each person's individual motivation and needs. [26:00] She distinguishes that urgent tasks are usually responses to others' requests while important tasks move you closer to your values and goals. [28:17] Anne Marie shares how her relationship with vulnerability has changed through the series of transformations she had in her lifetime and career. [31:03] She describes actively seeking rejection to desensitize herself, advising people to "fail first, go fail a lot." [32:54] Anne Marie's closing advice is for leaders to share their vulnerabilities and be "shape shifting leaders" who find the best in everyone. [34:16] And remember...“Inaction breeds doubt and fear. Action breeds confidence and courage. If you want to conquer fear, do not sit home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” - Dale Carnegie Quotable Quotes "It requires practice, and it requires practice with failing and getting comfortable failing." "If you're not failing, you're really not pushing yourself to be audacious." "Audacity at the base, right, is about optimism. And it's not optimism that things are going to work out the way you want it to. It's optimism that you're going to survive no matter how they work out." "If the price is too high to do the work, to create the change, then wait till you get the bill for regret, because that is super steep." "I would far rather have a list of failures than have a list of regrets." "You're going to get information as to how to take your next step. If you don't take that first step, how do you know where to go?" "Elite performers on that last one, inner critic, have great control of their inner critic power. They don't silence it. You can't silence your inner critic, but you can recognize it for what it is." "Your front row needs to be those people who will challenge you, who will push you, who will tell you the truth." "A great leader is somebody who's going to be able to say, obviously, I have all of these incredibly urgent matters. I'm carving out specific times to work toward our goals, our future." "Things that are urgent are usually in response to a request... Things that are important move us closer to our values, vision, goals, who we want to be." "I tell people, fail first, go fail a lot. Whatever the thing is you're most afraid of, do that one first. When you start actively seeking it out, it becomes easier." "To really understand human behavior, I think you have to understand what people fear." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Anne Marie Anderson Website | Anne Marie Anderson LinkedIn | Anne Marie Anderson Instagram | Sign up for Anne Marie Anderson book updates: /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37477580

TLP473: Leading Those Who've Served with Barry Jesinoski 08/20/2025

TLP473: Leading Those Who've Served with Barry Jesinoski Barry Jesinoski is the National Adjutant and CEO of Disabled American Veterans (DAV), leading an organization with over one million members. In this episode, Barry shares his unconventional journey from a young Marine who needed help to leading one of America's most respected veteran service organizations, despite never completing a college degree. He explains why he limits remote work, and reveals the two fundamental principles that every DAV employee learns from day one. He discusses how integrity and communication became the foundation for building organizational culture.. Barry shares what it truly means to be a "disabled veteran", and explains that many veterans with service-connected disabilities don't consider themselves disabled at all. Barry also reveals how DAV maintains effectiveness in Washington across changing administrations. The organization stays completely apolitical and focuses solely on what benefits veterans, their families, and survivors. This strategy has helped DAV influence virtually every major piece of veteran-friendly legislation while spending only 1% of their budget on lobbying efforts. This episode offers practical wisdom for leaders wondering how to build authentic organizational culture and lead effectively without traditional credentials. You can find episode 473 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Barry Jesinoski on Key Takeaways [02:19] Barry reveals that people would have to dig to discover he doesn't have a college degree, explaining "I believe most people assume that I have a degree, maybe multiple degrees, maybe an advanced degree. I do not have a college degree." [04:01] Barry outlines his journey from Marine Corps service and medical discharge to being hired by DAV despite lacking a college degree, then explains DAV's move from Cincinnati to their current Erlanger, Kentucky headquarters. [07:22] Barry describes their new headquarters' employee benefits and explains his belief that "collaboration and ingenuity production suffers when a workforce is remote, say even beyond 20% of the time." [11:44] Barry establishes his core leadership values of integrity and communication, explaining how these helped him succeed when promoted at age 23 over two colleagues with 20+ years experience. [18:29] Barry clarifies that many veterans with service-connected disabilities don't consider themselves disabled, noting the spectrum ranges from simple scars to full-time care needs, including invisible symptoms like PTSD. [23:54] Barry outlines DAV's broader mission including Washington lobbying, vehicle donation programs, employment matching, volunteer networks, and the Patriot Boot Camp entrepreneurial program with mentoring sessions. [31:06] Barry addresses DAV's political stance, emphasizing "We are completely apolitical. We have to be" and explaining they support anything "good for veterans, their family members and their survivors." [34:26] Barry directs people to learn more about DAV through their website at dav.org and mentions they have "about 1.4 million followers on social media." [35:57] And remember...“The supreme quality for leadership is unquestionably integrity. Without it, no real success is possible, no matter whether it is on a section gang, a football field, in an army, or in an office.” - Dwight D. Eisenhower Quotable Quotes "When I talk about integrity, I'm really talking about people who do what they say they will, people who always project a good image of our organization, people who listen before being heard, people who put in an honest day's work and take pride in their work, and people who respect others." "The communication part, that's really about communicating honestly, actively and proactively, really asking questions when you have them, especially when you're new." "I believe that distance or absence makes the heart grow colder, not fonder." "I'm a firm believer that collaboration and ingenuity production suffers when a workforce is remote, say even beyond 20% of the time." "Many of us who are technically qualified or considered to be by the VA disabled veterans... we don't consider ourselves disabled at all. I'm not. I didn't consider myself disabled when I was medically discharged from the Marines and I haven't considered myself as such a day since." "If it's good for veterans, their family members and their survivors, we're on it. If it's bad for that same group of people, we're on it. And we will call out lawmakers who are not doing right, we believe by our veterans any and every day of the week." "I found that operating with integrity and through strong communication served me well in my career." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Disabled American Veterans (DAV) Website | Disabled American Veterans (DAV) Facebook | Disabled American Veterans (DAV) X | Disabled American Veterans (DAV) LinkedIn | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37425095

TLP472: Embracing Uncertainty with Dr. Margaret Heffernan 08/13/2025

TLP472: Embracing Uncertainty with Dr. Margaret Heffernan Dr. Margaret Heffernan has written six books including "Willful Blindness: Why We Ignore the Obvious at Our Peril" and "Uncharted: How to Navigate the Future," both widely recognized as top business books. Dr. Heffernan returns to the Leadership Podcast with insights from her new book "Embracing Uncertainty: How writers, musicians and artists thrive in an unpredictable world." She challenges conventional wisdom on how we think about decision-making in uncertain times. She reveals why leaders need to step away from predictive algorithms and reclaim their human capacity for intuition. She discusses the difference between healthy uncertainty and harmful vagueness, sharing practical techniques for leaders who want to make better decisions without drowning in endless analysis. She reveals why agenda-free meetings often produce better results than structured ones, and how silence can be more powerful than speaking. Through personal examples, Dr. Heffernan demonstrates how apparent failures can become unexpected successes when we learn to sit with uncertainty rather than rush to conclusions. This episode provides actionable insights for leaders who want to navigate uncertainty with confidence, make decisions with incomplete information, and create space for the unexpected insights that drive breakthrough thinking. You can find episode 472 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:32] Dr. Heffernan reveals what's not in her public bio: she's been trying to grow vegetables for about 10 years and is still absolutely terrible at it, and she's currently learning Italian, which is a deeply humbling experience. [04:53] Dr. Heffernan explains that leaders can reclaim intuition for better decision-making by absorbing quality information through everyday observations—like walking city streets or eavesdropping on conversations—to "restock their mental kitchen" with rich ingredients that will inform future choices when needed. [10:11] Dr. Heffernan confirms that when you slow down, thoughts bubble to the surface - some mundane like "oh God, I forgot to feed the cat," others valuable like identifying the right person for a job that your brain was processing subconsciously. [11:59] Dr. Heffernan distinguishes between necessary ambiguity and harmful vagueness by explaining that decisions are always ambiguous because they're "hypotheses about the future," but harmful vagueness occurs when leaders don't ask clear questions or establish what decision needs to be made. [17:09] Dr. Heffernan describes transforming a board she chairs from having overly strict agendas to focusing on "what are the three most important things we need to be talking about right now," explaining she has more often seen time wasted from detailed agendas than loose ones. [20:33] Dr. Heffernan explains that "action is how you search" - you can talk, think, and research forever, but the only way to know if something will work is to start, emphasizing that what really matters is beginning, not necessarily where you start. [23:06] Dr. Heffernan suggests that risk tolerance may actually be lower than ever before, but people's level of anxiety drives them to reduce risk, working with wealthy companies whose "risk aversion is almost tangible" despite having enormous resources. [24:36] Dr. Heffernan acknowledges that artists and musicians must be vulnerable to put themselves out there, but explains that most people she's worked with have high risk tolerance because "if you're going to do something meaningful and worthwhile, probably going to be something you haven't done before." [26:35] Dr. Heffernan shares that her book "Willful Blindness" initially seemed like a failure with only a couple of reviews after six months, but took off after making the Financial Times Business Book Award longlist and continues to have readers over a decade later. [28:53] Dr. Heffernan explains her motivation for writing "Embracing Uncertainty" stems from her belief that "the marginalization of the humanities and the arts, the defunding of the arts" is doing "immense harm" and represents "a gigantic loss, not just to the arts, but to all aspects of life." [32:01] Dr. Heffernan outlines her ideal leadership retreat opening: "sending people out for a walk and coming back to report what they saw," explaining this practice "wandering around stuff" and would reveal amazingly different observations from different people. [33:43] Dr. Heffernan suggests the better instruction for the walking exercise would be "noticed" rather than "saw" because "you could notice in all sorts of different ways," allowing people to focus on hearing, feeling, or thinking differently. [40:57] Dr. Heffernan explains she's become "much less concerned about planning now," leaving more margins for things to go wrong and scheduling less frantically to create "space and time for things to happen." [42:39] Dr. Heffernan describes a transformative experiment where she appointed herself "the listener" in meetings, discovering that when you're not looking for moments to speak, "you actually are listening to the person who's speaking instead of rehearsing in your mind what you're going to say next." [45:48] Dr. Heffernan concludes that leaders should remember "what's uncertain is a whole range of things that are possible" and warns against "demanding too much certainty too fast" because "what's certain is what's known and something you've done before," while innovation requires exploring uncertainty rather than shutting it down. [46:57] And remember...“Uncertainty is a very good thing: it's the beginning of an investigation, and the investigation should never end.” - Tim Crouch Quotable Quotes "Intuition is a very accelerated retrieval of a lot of stuff that's been roaming around in your head. The issue is, how do you make sure that the stuff roaming around in your head is quality stuff." "Action is how you search. You can talk about stuff forever. You can think about stuff forever. You can research stuff forever. But the acid test is, do you start?" "What's uncertain is a whole range of things that are possible. Be careful of demanding too much certainty too fast in too many domains because what's certain is what's known and something you've done before." "If you're desperate to speak, you don't listen. I realized that's what I'd been doing a lot of my life - looking for the moment where I could land my brilliant contribution." "The only way I can know if I can write a book is to write a book. I can think about it forever, but actually, I will never know unless I do it." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Dr. Margaret Heffernan Website | Dr. Margaret Heffernan X | Dr. Margaret Heffernan Instagram | Dr. Margaret Heffernan Facebook | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37372105

TLP471: How Fear Drives Behavior and Why Traditional Leadership Backfires with Kurt Gray 08/06/2025

TLP471: How Fear Drives Behavior and Why Traditional Leadership Backfires with Kurt Gray Kurt Gray is a professor of psychology and neuroscience, and the author of "Outraged: Why We Fight About Morality and Politics and How to Find Common Ground." In this episode,. Kurt explains why our workplaces have become battlegrounds of moral outrage. Kurt's groundbreaking premise challenges the fundamental assumptions leaders make about motivation and conflict. While we've been taught that humans are driven by conquest and dominance, Kurt's research reveals we're actually hardwired as prey animals, constantly scanning for threats and seeking protection through tribal bonds. This isn't just academic theory—it's the key to understanding why your team members react with such intensity to seemingly minor workplace conflicts, why facts fail to resolve disputes, and why traditional leadership approaches often backfire in our current climate of perpetual outrage. Kurt reveals why social media has weaponized our ancient prey instincts, creating what Kurt calls "moral panics" that spread faster than ever before. Kurt introduces the revolutionary concept of "stories of harm"—the narratives that drive all moral conflict. Kurt also discusses the "vulnerability paradox"—how the strongest leaders actually become more effective by showing vulnerability first. Kurt outlines his practical framework for CIVil discourse: Connect, Invite, and Validate. This isn't corporate speak or sensitivity training. It's a research-backed approach that acknowledges our prey psychology while channeling it toward productive outcomes. Leaders learn how to connect with people as human beings before diving into disagreements, how to genuinely invite different perspectives without triggering defensive responses, and how to validate concerns without necessarily agreeing with conclusions. This episode is a timely reminder that outrage doesn’t have to define us and that leadership starts with understanding how others perceive harm. You can find episode 471 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:28] Kurt reveals he starts out in geophysics before transitioning to psychology, looking for natural gas in the Canadian wilderness before studying people's minds. [03:35] Kurt explains that while we think of humans as apex predators based on museum dioramas of cave people with spears, we're actually fairly weak and were more likely hiding from predators in the past, worried about getting eaten. [06:49] Kurt explains that people work together in groups for protection - one human naked in the wilderness won't survive long, so we need teams to help us survive and protect each other from threats. [08:17] Kurt explains that emotions and gut feelings drive our decisions more than facts, and when people have strong moral convictions, they dismiss facts from the other side as "not the right facts" or "not real facts." [11:24] Kurt suggests framing challenges as positive ways to rise to the occasion rather than focusing on fear, emphasizing resilience and future-facing thinking about how teams can be stronger. [13:21] Kurt emphasizes seeing people as three-dimensional rather than flattening them to just the opinion you disagree with, and highlighting common values and missions that organizations share. [14:54] Kurt acknowledges the trend of self-segregation but suggests focusing on deeper unifying concerns about protecting ourselves, families, companies, and nations from harm. [17:57] Kurt explains multiple factors including cable news, social media's ability to incite moral panics through limitless threats paired with virality metrics, and the resulting purity tests when people feel threatened. Kurt explains that debates often center on "who's the real victim" - in immigration, the right sees American citizens as victims while the left sees undocumented immigrants as victims fleeing violence. [23:16] Kurt explains that in group conflicts, minds think of moral competitions as binary (perpetrator or victim), and people stick to victimhood claims because it's better to be the victim than the perpetrator. [27:51] Kurt explains that vulnerability creates connection - when forced to be vulnerable with others (like being stuck in wilderness conditions), people bond incredibly because they're all in trouble together. [30:38] Kurt references Nick Epley's studies where people on Chicago trains think deep conversations would be awkward but actually love them, bonding much faster through meaningful questions rather than small talk. [32:54] Kurt confirms this, explaining our minds are hardwired to find threats, so when obvious threats like starvation don't exist, we expand minor threats into big ones - calling this "creep of harm." [36:28] Kurt confirms that our minds evolve to protect us from harm by paying attention to places where we feel victimized in the past, like always remembering an intersection where you get mugged. [39:01] Kurt outlines Connect (ask questions to connect as human beings before discussing politics), Invite (genuinely invite them to share beliefs with motivation to understand), and Validate (appreciate their vulnerability in sharing without immediately arguing back). [43:28] Kurt emphasizes asking "what harms do they see?" when confronted with someone who disagrees, as this takes you out of your own mind into theirs and allows you to meet them where they're at. [45:38] And remember...“Morality is not the doctrine of how we may make ourselves happy, but how we may make ourselves worthy of happiness.” - Immanuel Kant Quotable Quotes "We are more hunted than hunter." "Conflict flattens people and it flattens people to just the opinion that they have that you disagree with." "People say, you know what I want. I want the facts... And then people say, not those facts. Those are not the right facts. Those are not real facts. Facts are very flimsy, especially in cases where we have strong moral convictions." "Social media is so good at inciting moral panics because it has two features. One of them is a limitless supply of threats... And two, it pairs these threats with virality metrics." "The way to be comfortable being vulnerable with others is, in fact, by trying to get other people to be comfortable being vulnerable with you." "The safer we are, the more we take minor threats and we expand them in our minds to be big threats." "We should, as leaders take a Hippocratic oath to do no harm." "The reason we work is not just to make money and take care of our families. We work, you know, in the service of other human beings to make other people's lives better." "A lot of the behavior we see in the work world is based on fear." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Kurt Gray Website | Kurt Gray X | Kurt Gray LinkedIn | Kurt Gray Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37331670

TLP470: Blue-Collar Careers Destigmatized with Ken Rusk 07/30/2025

TLP470: Blue-Collar Careers Destigmatized with Ken Rusk Ken Rusk is owner of Rusk Industries and bestselling author of "Blue-Collar Cash: Love Your Work, Secure Your Future, and Find Happiness for Life". Ken is also a motivational speaker who achieved WSJ Bestseller status with Blue-Collar Cash during the pandemic. In this episode, Ken reveals why 77 million Americans still work with their hands, yet blue-collar careers remain stigmatized. He shares his revolutionary approach to employee engagement through what he calls "hiring the whole person" - not just the eight hours they work, but understanding their dreams, goals, and what they're chasing in life. Ken also discusses the critical difference between reactive and proactive work environments, why blue-collar workers often have more control over their outcomes than white-collar employees, and how leaders can create what he calls "momentum mechanisms" that align personal and corporate goals. He shares memorable stories from his entrepreneurial journey, including the moment he realized two employees were making him money while he worked elsewhere, and the life-changing experience of working for someone who "thought big" in every aspect of life. Ken's pragmatic approach to leadership development, employee engagement, and business growth offers actionable insights for leaders in any industry who want to create environments where people can design the lives they want while contributing to organizational success. You can find episode 470 on YouTube, or wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [03:11] Jan raises the question of how leaders can reshape the way society sees dignity and value in all kinds of work. Ken points out that nearly half of the 167 million fully employed Americans still work with their hands, a reminder that blue collar work remains essential. [04:59] Ken highlights that blue collar workers often have more control over what they produce, which gives them a direct connection to their work. He describes the “stand back moment” — a sense of pride in creating something tangible, a feeling that’s often missing in office jobs. [07:35] Reflecting on 38 years in business, Ken shares how his company grew from 6 to over 200 people. He talks about building a culture that made "ditch digging cool" before workplace culture was even a buzzword — hiring not just for the hours on the job but for the full person behind the role. [11:33] Ken talks about assigning someone the role of “Chief Culture Officer” or “Chief Cool Officer” to keep the company environment engaging. They swapped the word "goals" for "time pathways" and made personal milestones visible, so people feel invested in their work and each other. [14:08] Ken notes how side gigs have become more common. With tools like social media and mobile banking, many are turning hobbies — like making epoxy river tables into thriving weekend businesses selling for thousands. [16:00 Ken says his definition of success has shifted. What matters most now is time having the freedom to step back, see the big picture, and choose how to engage with his businesses. [17:15] One hard-earned lesson for Ken: drop the ego. He realized building a company isn’t about being the hero, it’s about finding people with entrepreneurial spirit and letting them lead because sometimes they’ll take it even further than he could alone. [19:15] Ken shares how he communicates financial responsibility by focusing on ROI instead of just dollars. He encourages department heads to think like owners by sharing profits from new revenue or cost savings creating buy-in from top to bottom. [23:49] When teaching ROI, Ken keeps it simple. He gives team leads a whiteboard and makes them subtract expenses manually — like balancing a checkbook — so they understand how their actions impact profits they can share in. [25:52] Ken encourages young people to ask "why" before choosing college or a trade. He suggests drawing a picture of their ideal life — the home, lifestyle, hobbies — then working backwards from that to choose a path. The key isn’t what you do, but what you do with it. [30:23] Ken shares two defining moments: one, realizing he could earn income even when not physically present on a job site; and two, working for someone who lived and thought on a massive scale. Both experiences showed him the power of big thinking and building something bigger than himself. [36:56] To close, Ken encourages people to block out the noise of expectations. Everyone knows what they truly want deep down. The key is to put that vision in front of you, let it guide you, and go live the life you actually want. [39:03] And remember...“The ultimate value of life depends upon awareness and the power of contemplation rather than upon mere survival.” — Aristotle Quotable Quotes "Almost half the people in the United States are in some form of working with their hands to create, fix, repair, build something." "When you hire somebody, it used to be that you hired the eight hours that they were alive and working. Well, you better now know what that something else is." "When you have corporate goals that are on the same track and same speed as personal goals of the people within it, that's where this amazing synergy happens." "Time is probably your most valuable asset that you're ever going to own." "Did I open this company for it to run me or for me to run it?" "You're going to find out that their seedlings might even be higher than yours. You might be your own self limiter." "I don't necessarily think it's as important what you do for a living as it is what you do with what you do for a living." "You really need to stop listening to all the noise of societal expectations and even what other people think you should do." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Ken Rusk Website | Comfort Peace and Freedom Foundation | Ken Rusk X | Ken Rusk Facebook | Ken Rusk LinkedIn | Ken Rusk Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37303380

TLP468: The Power of Doing Nothing 07/16/2025

TLP468: The Power of Doing Nothing In this episode, Jim and Jan explore the power of doing nothing and why it might be the most strategic move a leader can make. They begin with a discussion on Jan’s Crucible® expeditions, and the consistent lesson is that you have to slow down to speed up. For Jim, it means intentional time without distractions. For Jan, it means hiking alone in silence, letting his mind wander and connect unexpected thoughts. They share how leaders like Einstein and Da Vinci embraced doing nothing as a form of active thinking. Jim and Jan also talk about character and discipline, referencing General Stanley McChrystal’s formula where character equals conviction times discipline. They explain how many people are disciplined but have never paused to ask whether their actions are aligned with their true values. They also stress that alignment is not a one-time event but a continuous process that requires regular feedback and adjustment. Jim and Jan also talk about the pressure people feel today, especially around layoffs and uncertainty. They highlight the importance of stepping back to identify the real problem before jumping into action. Jim points out that when leaders rush to act without reflecting, they waste those resources. Jim and Jan believe leaders need a think list, not just endless to-do lists. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, stuck, or unsure where to focus next, this episode is a chance to reset. You can find episode 468 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [01:22] Jan asked Jim what he learned from his three crucibles. Jim said the biggest lesson is that “you have to unplug.” Solitude and stillness are essential for deep thinking and avoiding distractions. Jan added that you have to slow down to speed up, a principle he discovered during a hike in the snow-covered mountains. [02:29] Jan shared that doing nothing doesn’t mean sitting still. His mind was racing during the hike, processing thoughts like a “1985 MTV video.” He explained that movement without distractions lets his thoughts roam freely and helps him reset mentally. He drew inspiration from Einstein, who used solitude to spark creativity. [04:04] Jan discussed General McChrystal’s formula: character equals conviction times discipline. He said discipline alone is not enough if your convictions are flawed. Jim referenced a quote often attributed to Abraham Lincoln: if you have six hours to cut down a tree, spend three sharpening the axe. He stressed the importance of thinking before acting. [07:02] Jan advised leaders to keep a think list instead of a to-do list. He asked Jim how he finds time to think. Jim shared how stepping back during his entrepreneurial journey helped him recognize the right opportunity. Jim said doing nothing is about quieting your mind to open your eyes and ears. He explained that opportunities often go unnoticed when you’re laser-focused or moving too fast. [10:20] Jan said people under pressure need to “do nothing” in a productive way, like building relationships. He recalled early career advice that helped him shift from non stop work to meaningful connections. Jan reflected on how aging helped him realize what truly matters. He emphasized learning from others’ mistakes to save time. [13:56] Jim used to tell veterans to focus on themselves before helping others. He later realized that helping others while seeking support lifts your spirits and sharpens your own clarity. Jim encouraged leaders to define the problem clearly before solving it. In meetings, he suggests everyone write down what problem they think they’re solving. If the team isn’t aligned on the problem, they can’t solve it effectively. [16:05] Jan shared a military lesson on shooting an azimuth to stay on course. He explained that even small mistakes in direction compound over time. Jim said alignment is not a one-time event but a continuous process. Jan emphasized the need for constant adaptability. Jan also noted that being “lazy” in the right way is really about being efficient with effort and resources. [23:40] Jim explained that efficiency isn’t just about maximizing profit. It’s about managing limited resources like time, money, warehouse space, and customer attention. Jan said energy is another limited resource that must be protected. [25:49] Jan said leaders must care for themselves mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. Jim closed by noting that throughout history, great leaders have stepped away to think. Those quiet periods led to their most valuable insights. If you never step back, you may never realize what you’re missing. [28:45] And remember...“Loneliness is the poverty of self; solitude is the richness of self.” - May Sarton Quotable Quotes "You have to slow down to speed up." "Some people can sit. I can't sit. My doing nothing is moving." "Character is conviction times discipline." "The pressure's on. Well, what do you think most people are going to do when they hear the pressure's on from the boss? Let's get busy, let's do something." "You should have a think list, not a to do list." "It's not about doing nothing. It's about quieting your mind so you can open your ears and your eyes to see things that were already there." "You gotta take care of yourself, mentally, physically, emotionally, spiritually..." "You have to schedule quiet time." "Loneliness is the poverty of self. Solitude is the richness of self." — May Sarton "Alignment isn’t a static thing that happened once." "If you don't take the time and make the time to check out, you'll never understand what value you're missing." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Jan Rutherford LinkedIn | Jan Rutherford X | Jim Vaselopulos LinkedIn | Jim Vaselopulos xX | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37270085

TLP467: Navigate Uncertainty with Kevin Eikenberry 07/09/2025

TLP467: Navigate Uncertainty with Kevin Eikenberry Kevin Eikenberry is a leadership expert with decades of experience and author of “Flexible Leadership: Navigate Uncertainty and Lead with Confidence”. Kevin explores what it takes to lead effectively in a constantly changing environment. He shares why being a “remarkable” leader isn’t about charisma or titles. It’s about intentional actions, self-awareness, and the ability to influence in complex and fast-changing environments. He challenges a common leadership trap: mistaking consistency for rigidity and explains how great leaders remain anchored in values while staying flexible in approach. He explores why so many leaders fail to delegate, how trust and influence suffer in remote settings, and the frequent mistake of promoting technical experts into people leadership roles without preparing them for the shift. He also explains that leadership hasn’t changed at its core, but the growing diversity of values has shifted the context dramatically. Kevin explains the confidence-competence loop and why the right leadership response often lies in managing tensions, not finding balance. He encourages leaders to slow down, reflect with purpose, and make conscious choices that align with the moment’s needs and not just their preferences. If you’ve ever wondered how to lead when the ground keeps shifting beneath you, this episode is one to listen to more than once. You can find episode 467 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [02:39] Kevin shared that he collects antique tractors and matching toy replicas. Growing up on a farm and being involved in his family’s agriculture business gave him real responsibility at a young age. That early exposure shaped how he sees leadership today: through the lens of contribution, accountability, and impact. [05:33] Kevin believes being remarkable starts with recognizing each person's ability to make a difference. It’s about instilling confidence without arrogance and acting intentionally. Great leaders help others believe they are capable and valuable, especially in environments filled with change. [09:40] Kevin challenges the false choice between being consistent or being flexible. He uses the image of a mature tree—rooted but able to bend—as a model for leadership today. Flexibility means changing your approach without compromising core values, especially as the context around you evolves. [13:39] Jim asked how the growing diversity of values affects leadership today. Kevin explained that while human behavior and leadership fundamentals haven’t changed, the context around them has shifted dramatically. [17:35] Many leaders want to delegate but get caught in the mindset that it’s quicker to do things themselves. Kevin frames delegation as an investment, not a transaction. Building trust and capability in others takes time up front, but it's essential—especially in distributed and hybrid work settings. [21:02] Kevin points out that organizations often promote top performers in technical roles without preparing them for leadership. He draws a parallel to sports that great players rarely make great coaches. [23:33] Kevin shares that to be intentional, leaders must slow down and reflect. Whether it’s quiet time during a commute or a simple end-of-day check-in, asking what went well and what could improve helps leaders stay grounded. Kevin stresses that reflection isn’t about ruminating, it’s about learning and adjusting. [29:02] Kevin notes that progress often comes after setbacks. When leaders own what’s theirs and shift focus to outcomes and others. Getting stuck in guilt or blame prevents forward movement. The key is to learn the right lessons and redirect energy to what matters next. [35:13] Kevin leaves us with a challenge: if you're still leading the same way you were before the pandemic, it's time to reassess. The world has changed. Flexible leaders recognize what the situation requires and adjust their approach—not based on habit, but on what will serve their people and outcomes best. [36:52] And remember...“All fixed set patterns are incapable of adaptability or pliability. The truth is outside of all fixed patterns.” - Bruce Lee Quotable Quotes “Being a flexible leader is about being willing to change my approach based on the context of the situation.” “Delegation has to be an investment.” “To be a truly flexible leader is a really hard task, because I'm suggesting that you have to go past your autoresponder.” “Reflection that informs maybe where the discipline should be.” “The confidence, competence cycle. Right. As we become more confident, it helps our competence, and as we become more competent, we become more confident.” “We think about leadership as being about three O's: outcomes, others and ourselves.” “What we need to do is manage the tension between things more than trying to find a perfect answer.” “If you haven't, if you've been consistent as a leader from then until now, do you think that all of those changes have conspired to make your approach to leading more effective? I'm not taking that bet.” This is the book mentioned in this book Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Kevin Eikenberry Website | Kevin Eikenberry You tube channel - Kevin Eikenberry The Remarkable Leadership podcast - Kevin Eikenberry X | Kevin Eikenberry Facebook | Kevin Eikenberry LinkedIn | Kevin Eikenberry Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37234600

TLP469: A Leadership Pyramid Model with Ray Palumbo 07/04/2025

TLP469: A Leadership Pyramid Model with Ray Palumbo Retired U.S. Army three-star General Ray Palumbo is co-founder and senior partner of Venturi Solutions, having served 34 years leading conventional and special operations forces during peacetime and combat. A former 160th Squadron pilot and West Point graduate, he now serves on multiple boards and is passionate about supporting injured military veterans and Gold Star families. In this episode, Ray discusses the critical distinction between leadership and generalship, explaining how generals must orchestrate multiple military capabilities while understanding how military power fits into broader national strategy. He reveals how his humble beginnings in a Pennsylvania steel town, raised by educators and coaches, instilled the mental toughness and values that would serve him throughout his military career. Ray explores the transformative experience of joining the elite 160th Special Operations Aviation Regiment, where constant assessment and high standards created a culture of excellence that changed his life. He breaks down his leadership pyramid model, emphasizing how successful organizations must establish unchanging values, cultivate culture that aligns values with behavior, build strategic capabilities, and communicate vision beyond immediate goals. Ray also addresses the complex challenge facing military veterans in today's polarized political environment, offering hope that stronger, more moderate leadership can bring the country back to "competing within the 40-yard lines." For leaders transitioning from military to corporate environments, veterans feeling disillusioned with current discourse, and executives seeking to build values-based organizations, this episode provides powerful insights on authentic leadership, strategic thinking, and the importance of maximizing life's "scraps of time" for continuous growth. You can find episode 469 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Ray Palumbo on A Leadership Pyramid Model Key Takeaways [05:02] - Ray explains his grandparents owned Columbus Tavern in Johnstown, Pennsylvania, he grew up in a coal town, came from a family of educators and coaches, his dad was a high school coach who became principal, and all family members had to play sports which taught mental toughness, discipline, and academic excellence. [06:41] - Ray confirms that the mental toughness his dad instilled, being educators who demanded academic excellence, and learning to be a team player, win, and lose with dignity was definitely ingrained growing up. [07:32] - Ray advises to "hang tough" because "the pendulum swings," believes the political discourse is polarized, and thinks stronger moderate leadership will bring the country back to "fighting the game between the 40 yard lines instead of from end zone to end zone." [09:29] - Ray explains there are similarities between military and corporate leadership, it comes down to values, mentions the army values of loyalty, duty, respect, selfless service, honor, integrity, personal courage, and emphasizes that values must be lived, not just carried in your wallet or on dog tags. [14:22] - Ray distinguishes that military leadership focuses on mission above self with potential personal sacrifice, while corporate leadership focuses on company loyalty and profitability. Generalship involves manipulating multiple capabilities and understanding how the military fits into all elements of national power including diplomatic, information, economic, and financial elements. [19:55] - Ray describes running a Combined Joint Special Operations Task force in Afghanistan where night operations sometimes resulted in civilian casualties, creating information challenges at local, national, NATO, and global news cycle levels, noting they "didn't figure it out at first" but "got better at it as time went on." [23:53] - Ray recalls a two star general telling him "we are all benefited and limited by our experiences," explaining he came from special operations with high expectations and had to learn not to "outrun your headlights" when commanding conventional forces doing complex air assault operations in Germany. [26:20] - Ray mentions working for General McChrystal in JSOC and reading "The Speed of Trust" by Stephen Covey, emphasizing that "trust goes a long way on cold, dark nights" when you have no control but must believe someone will get you where you need to go. [29:14] - Ray describes his pyramid model: establish values as the foundation, cultivate culture that reflects those values, build strategy to achieve desired ends, and communicate vision constantly, emphasizing that leaders must establish organizational values while culture aligns those values to actual personal behavior. [33:31] - Ray believes stronger moderate political leadership is needed but has strong opinions against senior officers opining about the commander in chief because it creates dilemmas for current soldiers who must follow orders while also respecting their former commanders who criticize the president. [37:48] - Ray explains that families have "suffered enough" during military service, today's political discourse involves digging into personal history, and many feel they've "given a lot already" and prefer other ways to help rather than dragging families through political campaigns. [39:09] - Ray shares a story from West Point where General Maxwell Taylor spoke about taking advantage of "scraps of time" throughout life, explaining that instead of hanging out drinking beer, using those moments for reading, studying languages, or practicing skills will put you ahead of competitors over a lifetime. [41:15] And remember..."Humility and knowledge and poor clothes excel Pride and ignorance in costly attire." - William Penn Quotable Quotes "We are all benefited and limited by our experiences." "You don't want to outrun your headlights at times." "When it comes to mission focus, military leadership is loyal to the Constitution and puts mission above yourself." "Generalship, in my view, to answer your question, finally, is understanding the nuance between management of military capabilities and how military, how the military fits into all the other elements of power at the national level." "We need stronger leadership that's more moderate." "I believe that organizations have to be successful organizations and successful leaders have to establish values of the corporation." "Culture is so important in my mind because what is culture? It's. It's aligning the corporate values, the base, to actual personal behavior, how they behave." "If you take advantage of your scraps of time throughout a lifetime, and all things being equal to your competitors, you're going to be ahead." "There's stuff you want to do because you have a bunch of tools on your tool belt. And then there's stuff you should do because the community, country, society, whatever, needs you to do those things, which is going to require sacrifice." These are the books mentioned in this episode Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Ray Palumbo LinkedIn | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37282505

TLP466: Story Is The Vehicle, Not The Cargo with Dan Manning 07/02/2025

TLP466: Story Is The Vehicle, Not The Cargo with Dan Manning Dan Manning is the Chief Story Architect at Build The Story, and a former fighter pilot and U.S. diplomat. Dan digs into the difference between storytelling that entertains and storytelling that leads to decisions. Dan breaks down how he helps people choose the right story for the right moment and how every story should reflect a transformation: from fear to confidence, from confusion to clarity. He also talks about the power of visuals in storytelling, advocating for using them as prompts rather than distractions. Dan shares a story about giving tough feedback to ChatGPT and what it revealed about truth and trust in the digital world. If you’re in a position of influence whether that’s in a boardroom or on a Zoom call, this conversation will get you thinking differently about how you communicate. You can find episode 466 wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [04:11] Dan shared how his varied experiences led him to storytelling.His background as a combat pilot and diplomat gave him lots of real-life stories. Each role taught him how to speak and connect in different ways. He says great stories come from living a full life. Teaching storytelling helped him improve his own skills. [05:57] Dan explained how he chooses the right story for the moment. He starts by asking what change he wants to spark. He chooses stories that move people from one mindset to another. It’s not about entertaining; it’s about making an impact. [09:26] Dan compares storytelling to how fighter pilots share lessons after missions. These “never again” stories are about mistakes and survival. In business, they help others learn without repeating those same mistakes. [11:11] Dan elaborated on how to make ‘never again’ stories work in business.Dan says a good story keeps people curious about what happened next. That curiosity helps the lesson stick. [13:37] Jim asked Dan about making his storytelling economical and precise. Dan always starts with the key message. He removes extra details so the main point stays clear. This helps people understand and remember what really matters. [19:59] Dan discussed the role of visuals in storytelling and whether we should ditch PowerPoint. Dan’s not a fan of slides, but he sees their value. He says visuals should support the message, not steal the spotlight. Use them to help people remember—not to do the talking for you. [25:22] Jim asked Dan about achieving conscious competence in storytelling. Dan learned to tell clear stories in high-stress situations. His military background taught him how to share complex ideas simply. Now, his goal is to help people act on what they hear. [29:38] Jan asked Dan about the paradox of emotional storytelling requiring emotional detachment. Dan says emotional stories must still stay focused. Even when a story is deep and personal, it should serve a purpose. If something doesn’t support the message, cut it out. [32:56] Dan explained his interaction with ChatGPT about “tough feedback.” He once asked ChatGPT for help and got a made-up excuse instead. It reminded him that AI can’t feel or judge—it just talks smoothly. He says let AI handle the easy stuff, and save the hard, creative thinking for people. [37:48] Dan believes good stories don’t just teach—they make people think. The real power is in getting listeners to reflect and ask their own questions. That’s what makes the story last. [39:33] And remember...“Humans think in stories, and we try to make sense of the world by telling stories.” - Yuval Noah Harari Quotable Quotes “You will never live long enough to make all the mistakes yourself. You have to learn from the mistakes of others.” “Story is the vehicle, not the cargo. The cargo is the important thing.” “I'm not trying to push my story onto other people. I want to find what is already in their mind that they're already interested in that makes them want to pull it from me. “ “Every story is a story of transformation.” “storytelling is the easiest way for humans to process information and use it to make a decision… And if I can be effective at conveying a story, I can shape the way that a person receives the information that I'm giving them. I can help them, I can drive their imagination to imagine what it would be like if you did the thing that I suggested that you should be doing. “ “I'm not telling stories for the sake of entertainment. I'm not telling stories so that people will laugh and nod and say, man, that guy's a great storyteller. I am telling stories because I want people to do something. I want them to make a decision too.” “If someone doesn't believe that the story you're about to tell is going to somehow benefit them, you're. They're not going to listen to you. “ “The more that we begin thinking about how we make decisions with tools like AI, the better off we are, because it's easy for us to just offload what we consider to be the hard work to AI, but we really need to be offloading the easy work to AI so that we have more time to do the hard work ourselves.” These are the books mentioned in this episode. Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Dan Manning Website | Dan Manning LinkedIn | Dan Manning X | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37157800

TLP465: How Mental Toughness is Developed with Dr. Andreas Stamatis 06/25/2025

TLP465: How Mental Toughness is Developed with Dr. Andreas Stamatis Dr. Andreas Stamatis is a Professor at the University of Louisville and a Mental Performance Specialist at UofL Health, blending sport science, psychology, and leadership to help individuals and organizations thrive under pressure. In this episode, Andreas explores the foundation of mental performance—how it’s developed, why it’s often misunderstood, and what separates sustainable performance from momentary hype. Andreas introduces the “existential positive psychology”, a framework that views adversity as a growth opportunity—but only when it’s relevant. Andreas challenges the idea that mental toughness leads to selfishness. He explains that mental toughness is a personal construct—true strength lies in managing competing demands without losing yourself or others. He also tackles the corporate tendency to overvalue outcomes and undervalue behaviors. Andreas challenges that mindset, insisting that behaviors are more controllable, more consistent, and more ethical to reward. Andreas also sees potential in how AI can help shape behavior and context if used wisely. He compares it to any other high-performance tool: powerful when used with clarity and care. This conversation is for anyone who wants to build a mentally tough team, avoid burnout, and embrace the kind of leadership that values people over performance metrics. You can find episode 465 wherever you get your podcasts! Key Takeaways [03:14] Andreas breaks down mental performance, bringing with real-world examples. Andreas explains that mental performance isn’t about motivation—it’s about creating a “psychological infrastructure” that holds up under pressure, enabling sustainable, adaptable, and ethical performance when it matters most. [07:16] Andreas delved into existential positive psychology, using Lent as an example: “We do it because we understand that through stress, adversity, difficulty, we grow.” [09:28] Andreas pointed out what is relevant adversity. Forcing someone to run a marathon when they’re a diver won’t make them stronger—it’ll just derail them. True growth comes from adversity that aligns with personal goals. [10:45] To counter the perception that psychology is “soft,” Andreas uses data to show that mental toughness is a performance multiplier. His team collects evidence through interviews, questionnaires, and observations, proving that mental toughness improves not only performance but social cohesion and reduces issues like screen time addiction. [15:27] When asked if there’s such a thing as too much mental toughness, Andreas acknowledged the danger of a “machismo mentality.” While grit is valuable, it can become toxic when it turns into blind persistence that sacrifices well-being. [19:04] One of Andreas’s most powerful insights came when Jim quoted him: “The entity cannot be more important than the humans that support it.” He critiqued the “performance trap,” where results are prioritized over ethical behavior and people. Andreas advocates for a shift in culture—focusing on the process, the mindset, and the individuals who drive performance, rather than just the outcome. [24:08] When AI came up in the conversation, Andreas compared it to any high-performance tool: not a replacement for humans, but a servant to human potential. He envisions AI helping people fine-tune their focus, regulate emotions, and stay resilient by providing real-time, personalized feedback. [31:18] And remember...“Nothing can stop the man with the right mental attitude from achieving his goal; nothing on earth can help the man with the wrong mental attitude.” - Thomas Jefferson Quotable Quotes "So existential positive psychology says, yes, be proactive, work on your strengths. However, that trauma, stress, adversity that you go through, it has the potential for growth." "Even in your darkest hour, there could be something that could help you grow and become better human." "So we’re not looking for adversity just to look for adversity... we need to take them through the process that would lead them to put them in a better position to be successful towards those goals." "Mental toughness is a multiplier." "The mentally tough mindset is purposeful, which means you know where you're going. There's direction, and there's energy towards those goals as a purposefulness." "The mentally tough mindset has efficiency, which means there's a congruency between your behaviors and your goals. Otherwise, they're just dreams." — "When you have a goal in order to achieve that goal, there are behaviors that you need to do in order to achieve that goal. Behind that one step before that is the mindset." “mental toughness is a personal construction. There’s no team mental toughness. It’s. It’s something that you have to work on yourself. I don’t see it as something that necessarily is negative. I see it as empowering." “an actual real mentally tough person can work with conflicting goals, that’s how we say, or interest." "So metrics start to, in a way, overshadow mindset and then the behavior becomes transactional. So that’s the performance trap. So we reward results even if they were achieved unethically or unsustainably, and we punish failure even if the process was sound and value aligned and we did the best we could under the circumstances. But the truth is this. Outcomes are variable. Markets shift, opponents adjust, life throws curveballs. But mindset can be trained, stabilized, and eventually applied across all of it." “When the standard, people know what's expected from them, no matter the result, the culture becomes behavior driven and value based and performance becomes more consistent and stress goes down." Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | Facebook | LinkedIn | Instagram | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37131245

TLPMM012: On Character with General Stanley McChrystal 06/18/2025

TLPMM012: On Character with General Stanley McChrystal In this Mastermind episode of The Leadership Podcast, General Stanley McChrystal returns for a third conversation—his most personal and revealing appearance yet. Stan discusses the defining choices in his life, the moments that shaped his character, and the values that continue to guide his leadership. He talks about how his parents influenced his values through action, not words, and how his mother’s sudden death when he was sixteen changed the trajectory of his life and family. Stan shares his experience including near-expulsion from West Point, and another in his early Special Forces days when he learned that trying to be liked is not the same as leading well. Stan describes what it was like to work under leaders who lacked character, and how those experiences helped him define the kind of leader he never wanted to become. He discusses how having strong peers and a grounded spouse helped him stay true to his principles, even in environments where it was easy to lose direction. Stan shares how aging has narrowed his circle and sharpened his expectations for friendship. He also talks about how his views on war have evolved. He argues that true change in leadership and values may require discomfort or even crisis to take root. Stan shares why he believes society needs shared standards again—not to suppress individuality, but to maintain mutual respect and unity. Whether you’re a young professional, a seasoned leader, or someone thinking about the legacy you want to leave, this episode will challenge you to reflect. Stan reminds us that we’re not passengers in our own development. We can choose the kind of leader we want to be. You can find this mastermind episode wherever you get your podcasts! Watch this Episode on YouTube | Key Takeaways [04:05] Stan shared how the foundation of his character was quietly built at home. His father, a combat infantryman, was steady and soft-spoken—the kind of man young Stan wanted to emulate. His mother, a thoughtful Southern woman, modeled integrity and social conviction. Stan said, “They never sat us down and talked to us about values… they just lived in a way that you thought, well, that’s the right way to go.” [07:11] Stan reflected on the emotional toll of losing his mother at 16. Her sudden death shook the entire family and deeply impacted his father, who, despite being a general and a warrior, visibly broke down. [09:01] When asked how he became the person he is today, Stan talked about trying on different leadership personas. He once tried being the “hard-ass” and even channeled General Patton, only to discover none of them fit. Eventually, through reflection and mistakes, he said, “At some point, there is a you, and you’ve got to sort of figure out what that is.” [11:43] Stan admitted that he came dangerously close to being expelled from West Point. It’s a story he laughs about now, but he acknowledged that if he hadn’t graduated, “we would not be laughing about it now.” [13:01] One of Stan’s earliest moral tests came during Ranger School. Exhausted and frustrated with a peer leader, Stan and a few others simply refused to follow orders. “There was a right and wrong… and we did the wrong thing,” he confessed. He’s carried the shame of that moment ever since, not because of the person they disrespected—but because he remembers what he did. [15:20] Stan looked back on his time as a young Special Forces lieutenant and admitted that he tried too hard to be liked. Over time, he learned that leadership isn’t about popularity—it’s about standards and setting the tone. A pivotal leadership lesson came when Stan was publicly fired by a seasoned commander after making a cocky remark in a meeting. “I’ve decided relieving you is wrong,” the major later told him. “You’re going to stay here, and I’m going to teach you to be an Army officer.” That humbling moment became a turning point—one Stan says he was lucky to receive. [20:19] Early in his career, Stan served under a battalion commander who taught him how not to lead. “He humiliated himself,” Stan realized, after being screamed at during a march. Later, that same leader quietly reenlisted an unfit soldier just to hit a metric—an act that shattered any remaining trust. “You don’t need a lot of examples like that to say: I will never do that.” [24:04] When asked if a public figure ever failed the character test, Stan said yes—and the disappointment stuck. “You start to say, well, if they’re really good at what they do, is it okay they do things they shouldn’t?” His answer: No. “Everybody’s got weaknesses… but there are bounds of acceptability,” and if someone crosses them, he simply steps away. [26:20] Stan shared that as he’s gotten older, his circle has gotten smaller. “I actually have a very small number of friends,” he said. While he’s become less judgmental, he’s also more selective. “I’m going to have people that I really respect and like—because that’s who makes me respect myself.” [27:50] Reflecting on whether younger people can shortcut the wisdom that comes with age, Stan emphasized the power of reading. Books like Once an Eagle offered different lessons at each stage of life. “Life is nuances forever,” he said, and engaging with deep, thoughtful material can guide us when experience hasn’t caught up yet. [28:54] Stan talked candidly about how his views on war have evolved. “Wars don’t actually solve the problem that we hope they will,” he said. After seeing combat firsthand, he became more cautious. But he also noted how those who sacrifice gain legitimacy in shaping national decisions. “They now felt legitimate,” he said of Israeli soldiers after Gaza—ready to sit at the table. [34:13] Stan’s call for a national conversation on character is rooted in concern for our systems. “We’ve let character erode,” he said. Good people enter politics and emerge changed—warped by the system’s demands. He doesn’t believe politicians will lead this movement. “It’ll start in schools, on teams, in churches,” he said. “Most of you are not being the people you even want to be.” [38:11] On the question of whether pain is necessary for change, Stan said plainly, “Yes, I think there has to be more pain.” He saw it during the transformation of JSOC—reform only came during failure. While he believes powerful leaders could spark change, he warned, “The history of very powerful leaders is you get something you don’t want.” [39:35] Stan acknowledged the tension between individuality and unity. “There need to be standards of decorum,” he said. He isn’t advocating for hats and skirts, but for shared norms that show respect. “The society doesn’t work without some kinds of rules,” he warned—rules that give us common ground. [42:18] Stan offered this insight: “Who you are is not an accident… make it intentional.” He believes we each have agency over our convictions and our discipline. His advice to young people: “Expect to stumble, expect to make mistakes… but move toward who you want to be. Don’t drift.” [45:07] And remember...“I think. Therefore I am.” - René Descartes Quotable Quotes “A leader is not an individual rock that everybody comes around. It’s a group of people, and you reinforce each other.” “Everybody’s got weaknesses… but there are bounds of acceptability.” "Leadership is never about the leader. It's about the mission, the people, and the values we refuse to compromise." “Life has nuances forever.” “Wars don’t actually solve the problem that we hope that they will.” “Who you are is not an accident. That just happens.” “Make decisions on who you want to be and then move toward that.” “Expect to stumble, expect to make mistakes.” "Why do we allow politicians to lie to us when we know they're lying and they know we know it? Why do we put up with that?" “Becoming who you want to be starts with deciding what that is.” “Character is the only metric that matters.” "You may not control your physical surroundings, but you control your mind." “Reaching our convictions demands deep reflection.” “The most critical discipline is to think for ourselves.” Books mentioned in this episode: Resources Mentioned The Leadership Podcast | Sponsored by | Rafti Advisors. LLC | Self-Reliant Leadership. LLC | General Stanley McChrystal Website | General Stanley McChrystal X | General Stanley McChrystal LinkedIn | Facebook | /episode/index/show/theleadershippodcast/id/37050715

The Leadership Podcast

TOPICS